Sex With Emily - From Mouth Parties to Bedroom Parties with Kandi Burruss

Episode Date: December 14, 2016

In today’s show, Emily is joined by Kandi Burruss, Real Housewives of Atlanta favorite and creator of the sexy Bedroom Kandi line. Together they share their hottest sex product picks, trade tantalizing bedroom tricks and get candid about giving (and getting) the best oral sex. Kandi also assists Emily in answering your emails on sex-toy shy partners, getting your lover to take the reins in bed, and finding your sexual confidence after a long break from dating. If you love sex toys, sex tips and totally uncensored bedroom talk, this show is not to be missed! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everyone, thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. And today's show I'm joined by Candy Burr, a star of the popular Real Housewives of Atlanta and creative of the female centric bedroom candy line. I've got menace here. Oh god, you're gonna love the show. Thanks for listening. You know how I'm always encouraging you to get a little more adventurous in the bedroom? Well our friends at Sportcheats, you know, the ones who pioneered easy to use bondage

gear, have just released the perfect products for your next adventure, the all-new midnight line. Midnight is a collection of sophisticated, playful, and adventurous accessories like lace cuffs, blindfolds, and one of our favorites, a lace collar and lace. Hey, pretty surmaticin. Remember that time I led you around the trade show wearing one?

How was that for you? You know, um, surprisingly good. It's really comfy. I liked it more than I thought I would. I know, right? Fun for everyone. Want to turn up the adventure dial a little more? No problem.

Midnight has a whole selection of high quality nipple clamps that not only feel amazing, but are really beautiful too. Hey, producer Madison, remember that, just kidding. Okay, don't underestimate a little nipple play. Trust me. Each item in the midnight collection is made from the highest quality materials. Everything is nicely weighted and feels amazing to use.

These are really the perfect way to bring a little special twist to your sexy playtime. Sportcheats has been keeping couples connected for more than 20 years and the Midnight collection is their latest masterpiece. To check out this or any of the other fun sportcheats products, click the Sportcheats banner on my website or visit sportsheets.com. That's s-p-o-r-t-s-h-e-e-t-s. dot com. Book into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex.

Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Betrubized, they call them in a bag on day. Hey, Emily. You got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got everything. Oh, my.

The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common, not only? What do you mean, like laundry? It's drinks? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh, my God. I'm so, so, so, so.

Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithemily.com. Have you not been there lately? Oh my god, you gotta check it out. You guys know we are updating with amazing content all day, every day so you can have better

sex just like this show. And when you make it easier than ever to subscribe, you can subscribe to everything. Our newsletter, social media, which is sex with Emily across the board. And most importantly, subscribe to the podcast. We love that and we love hearing from you and you can also shop the store. God, there's so much happening. I'm excited for the show.

Hello, Menace. Hello, how you doing? I'm great. How you been? I have been great traveling all over San Francisco or old hometown. Yeah. Where else have I been?

I don't even know. I don't even know. So anyways, yeah, I'm going to go do some more traveling. But I thank you everybody that's been embracing the new station that I'm on in St. Louis, Alt 1049, tune in, money through Friday, 6 to 10 AM, and also hearing about the Angeles, the Woody Show on Alt 987.

So many sex with Emily listeners, they listen to both shows. It's crazy. I love that, right? They get a little sexy, a little medicine in the morning. Yeah. That's crazy. We got to get you back on the show.

I want to come on the show. That was fun. I want to steal your chick there. She had no orgasm yet or what? No, she hasn't. She needs you to save her. Too okay. Let's say candy.

And we got a piece. If you don't know candy, because if you've been living under a rock which is totally fine There's a lot going on in the world today, but candy is amazing. She has a real house. What is it with Lanna? Yes, for what? Nine season right now. Well, it's been on for nine seasons, but I'm on I've been on for eight Okay, yeah, I came in the season two. Okay. I feel like you've been there. You're like the most I mean, I don't know I think about you. I think about you. I think about you.

I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you.

I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you.

I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think about you. I think always Joe it's actually a real but I joke about it because people I don't believe me that I literally have like stored you to its fill with just next toys I get very nostalgic about them But I remember you brought me was like five product was the lipstick. Yeah, it's so beautiful You'd really great products and now you have like a thousand products. I know already

It's really grown. Yeah. We've grown like so much since when we first started. Like I can't even believe it's something myself sometimes when I look at all the products that we have and everything we're doing. I know. It's pretty. And then you have, you know, you've just like mobilized troops around the country. Well, we have very candy buttea consultants.

So basically, you know, people who will come to you and bring the parties. You know, you just invite your guests and then we just help you have a great party. So, you know, and then, you know, of course, we, you know, have the products there for you to check them out and learn more about them. It's fun. I love that. We're going to get more into that later because I would just love to hear about that because I feel like, well, the reason why we just dived into this, because we're saying sex is,

people want more information about sex. We got the podcast, people can listen to, what else do people go for sex information? I'm not sure where they go besides here. You might not know. I mean, this is where you get the truth. I mean, if it's on TV, it's kind of, you know, you don't really have anything out there.

Right. And it's like wherever you go, literally, I just was getting a facial before, which is why my face is super red. If you were, and you might probably were not thinking that, but I'm just saying. But she was like, I never met her. I'm like, I'm super red.

I'm super red. But she said to me, and you probably get this too. She's like, wait, you do what? Can I ask you a question? And everyone's got a question. And she's like, my libido just isn't what it was. I'm like, okay, well, you're asking me one of the top five questions I get at, probably every single day.

And it's just, here she is a nurse. She's been in a light. But there's really people don't feel comfortable talking about it. I've just had a lot of places to go for it. So what I love about the parties that you do is that it is like women coming together and they're sitting and they're talking and it's comfortable.

Yeah, it's very comfortable. And then I mean, people can't, a lot of people don't even understand like a majority of women haven't even had it orgasm ever. So to be able to, you know, get tips from, you know, a group of your friends that you feel comfortable with, or you know, you have this consultant there

to answer any questions that you may have and tell you the right products that can help you get it. Exactly. I mean, if you watch Candy on television, she's never been shy about it. Never. Of course. That's like my favorite subject.

Right. I love that. So how did you, so for people who don't know maybe they haven't watched or how did you get into them or how is it? Um, actually Derek J. I don't know if you guys know him. I think they had him when Kim Zosie actually used to be on. He used to do our hair for her sometimes, but, um, he used to do my art too, but he was a friend of mine and he had told me he was like, yeah,

they looking for, you know, new housewives. He was like, I'm going to tell them your name because they need somebody with their own money. And I'm like, huh? What are you talking about? So that's how it all began. Okay. He introduced me to them and I mean, I guess they wanted to interview me and they, What are you talking about? So that's how it all began. OK. He introduced me to them. And I mean, I guess they wanted to interview me.

And they chose me. And I was like, OK, cool. But I had no idea that this was really going to be something that I would do for so long. I just was like, OK, it might be cool. Yeah, for a show. Yeah. You still like doing it?

Shooting part is not it. But we just didn't know. It can be intense. Yeah, because I Well, this is what I want to ask you. I'm sure it's very stressful to live through everything twice No, because it's crazy in the moment and then it gets put on television and then you got a wait and then everybody else Has their feedback and they're chiming in. So you have to live through everything like that. And then the media and every entertainment blog and all that kind of stuff has to chime in. And then they wait for you to respond and things like that.

Yeah, it's very stressful, especially when you're the person who has a big drama or something bad, where crazy happens, it's like, you know, you're dealing with it at that moment. And then you have to deal with it again when it airs. And then you have to deal with it again when we review it at the reunion. At the reunion show, it's right.

Yeah, and your like, we'll never die. Like usually you just have drama with someone and you be healed. It's gone. And everyone twists everything that you say. Yes, they do. Everything. Yeah, we're not at your level at all.

You're at a much higher level of like the The people that have the eyes on what everything that you say but even at this level It's just like any little tiny thing you'll get a tweet about how you're a horrible person Exactly, I can't even I can't even read I tell you to delete the emails all time. I know really I They say crazy stuff to you. Not as bad, I mean, honestly, like, she pronounced that word right. What would be the say? How did she hate on sex?

People hate on everything. What? I'm on. People like to hate on everything. But I gotta say, for doing this for 11 years, I don't think we get a lot of it. We don't get a ton of hate. But I'm also not interacting in a way

with there's like drama. I'm like, try to help you all have goddamn orgasms during intercourse, if you can, or talk to your partner about sex. So there's not, but every once in a while, people are like, slow down, you talk too fast, or whatever it is, but we don't have that stuff. This random stuff, yeah.

Random, random, random. We were gonna do, so we do a little sex in the news, little segment here, which I had a very warm spot in my heart about this one. The menace that reminded me of you. Okay, what? So, candy little background is that I, so we were saying that I started this podcast when

you came in like in 2005. And I really was just doing it because I was, like I said, had to have the best sex in my life. I mean, it got better by then. But I thought, there's got to be a place like where we could all learn from each other. And I just started interviewing people about their sex lives or relationships. So I started a podcast in my living room. And then six months later, I got a call from CBS Radio in San Francisco.

They were starting the station called Free FM. It was FM talk and they said, do you want to do your show live? I was like, sure. You know, I've never done that. But wow, that wasn't even a goal, but I'll go in. And so what I didn't know was that there's not, you know, FTC regulations, there's a lot of stuff you can't say on the radio.

So my first show or my second show was about masturbation. Well, this kid Menace was starting out. He was, yeah, I was in control of the dump. The dump. He met us, this was 11 years ago. So Menace was like sleeping at the, I was in control of the dump. The dump. Menace was 11 years ago. So menace was like sleeping at the station, building his way up.

Now he's on billboards in LA, and where he's going up. But proud of him. But the show, I'm like, well, would you meet a cancer masturbation? They're like, no, like once every 15 minutes, maybe, but you've got to come up with some other words for it, like euphemisms. So we started doing, so now there is a, our section of the story has to do with masturb, like euphemisms. So we started to do, so now there is a,

our section of the story has to do with masturbation euphemisms. Oh, nice. That's the background. Here are the greatest masturbation euphemisms from around the world. Here in America, we're pretty creative with our masturbation euphemisms. As you've probably noticed, this is probably

because there are literally no synonyms for masturbation. So here's what they say in other countries. Sweden waxed the salami. Russia greeting the unemployed. Can you somehow break this down for me? I have no idea. I heard that one.

Yeah. Romania. Shake hands with the president. Are you like, Hey babe, I gotta go. I'm just gonna go shake hands with the president. Like does that's not even sexy. She can't the president. Like does that's not even sexy. I don't even know. Finland to play the leather best soon. Would they be okay? There's been CBS radio. They told they wouldn't find Japan a thousand rubs.

France, milk, the cow. That's normal. Thailand pulling on a kite string So on trash or radio we can't say blow job. So what we say is mouth-party That's right. That's good. Let's go put C. I love line. That was it. But that was after love line We were able to I was you know love line. I was the last four years I was hosting it when I moved to LA. It just went off the air after 35 years. But when I tried to explain to you, you can say blow jobs. You can say blow jobs when you have some of the doctor, a doctor like Dr. Drew, like you can get away with saying things like that.

But you say mouth party, which actually it is a mouth party for some for others not so much. It's a mouth. I like it. I mean, blow jobs too. I mean, blow jobs, but I like mouth party. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a mouth party. Come on, let's have no jobs too. I have no jobs, but I like that party. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a mouth party.

So come on, let's have a mouth party. So in Atlanta, you know, I mean, every different city has their own, you know, type of slang, you know, what would you say if, is there anything out there that we don't know about? That's what I'm trying to think, is there anything? I mean, does that have to be masturbation? I mean, you may, oh, like poppia chairs.

Yeah, yeah. Hey, like, my mind is going to like, right? Yeah, it's fine. How are they? That's what happens to me when I get put on the spot. Yeah, it's like, I hate any point in the spot. Don't put me on the spot. But, um, so anyway, that was a little news because it reminded me of you. And so my question is, what about though,

when you said you're always been Disadct the box the box yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, totally normal right? Isn't there one like beat the beat box or beat in the box or I Give you a G if you beat box right now. But isn't there, I know what's the music thing. I'll give you a G if you beatbox right now. But isn't there a box? You've fromism that we've done in our list of you, I don't know. It is called a box, though.

It is. It's hard. How is it, though? So you've always been open to sex. So on the show, do you feel like, how is it greeted by your family, friends? Do you feel like you've... I mean, now you're still out there now, I know.

Well, I mean, as far as, like, I feel like my family, in general, like, on my mom's side of family, everybody's always been open-minded. Like, when I was younger, like, not way younger, but like, you know, by the time I was 20, like, why, we would have strippers come over for the birthday parties and baby showers. Like that. You've always been okay right. Yeah so it was never out. Just like my house.

You do. Right. Okay that's good. You know what? You kind of someone's needs that person in the group that's always open. Were you always that you that girl though like helping your friends? Oh no. Yeah I definitely was that girl.

Like I you know, I was the the fasts when that, you know, I was always looking at the nasty movies early. You know how when your cable box used to you could like wiggle something in the air kind of like straighten up the channel. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we used to try to look at the poor channels. Yeah. But you know, my friends, we at one point when I moved out my mom's house We used to have like all our friends used to bring the porn the new porn videos over like oh, did you see this way? Yeah, I was like a group of friends. Yeah, well, you know like yeah, like if you had a porn like you could tell your friends about it or whatever and and

You know we used we talk about it. I used to have know all the great nasty jokes, you know, or any type of tip that I had heard, like, oh, you know, if you get some like halls or whatever, and you give hit, it's the ball. Yeah. But you guys have stuff like that in your line that flavored, you guys have a couple of. Right? can we talk like flavored loops and stuff right?

Oh, yeah, we got favorite flavors. We have I nipple I mean we call it kiss and tingle But it's like different flavor to like creams you can put on the And it tingles and it's great and it's flavored Why don't I know so Okay, we put some of my nipples right now? Maybe later.

So you can blow it. You have a lot of, because someone is, they can work as a nipple. It is raspberry. It's a nipple, yeah. Yep. Wow. Or you can put it on your lips too.

It makes it. It was crazy though. You go give low jobs, so it tastes better. Is that what you're sitting put in? Well, yeah, yeah, no. Some people just like to put it on their lips. Because it tingles. Yeah.

Can we have a tingle party right now and open this? Okay, let's do this. Let's do it. A tingle party. I love everything, Nipples, because I just, I've never had a Nipple orgasm. You have it? No.

Have you? Apparently. I haven't had a full Nipple orgasm, but it's got me very close. Okay. That's like a goal. But you know what? I'm kind of weird because like, okay.

Everybody in my life, you know, I'm married now, but, you know, prior to some people will pass, you know, relationships, could lick my nipples and it didn't do anything for me. And then some people do it and it's just, it seems a tingle up and down. It's fine. You know? It could be chemistry, it could be because they're not laughing at like a dog, but they're really building around the nipples, breathing on it.

So let's go back to what you were just saying. So this bedroom candy, any glasses, it's the whole new thing, it's really fun. It's the whole new fun part of my life. So it's, oh, tingle, lip and nipple bump. Oh my God, I love this. So you put it's um, oh, tingle, lip and nibble bump. Oh my god, I love this. So you put it on. So it's tingles, but then if someone blows on it, it's even more enhanced. But you could use it on your own too. Yeah. Yeah. But it's great. Oh my god. It is.

It is so crazy. Just to go back like, well, back to the nibble orgasm. Well, to the nibble orgasm, yeah, I, you know, some someone can orgasm from that, but I just want to say just a just a line in general When we first met you and you had a couple items like I walked in and just you know, there's a whole table of stuff Do you have some favorites? Yes, I do have a favorite you all I have mini But okay, of course I always love our candy kisses, which is the lipstick. That's kind of like a go-to for anybody.

That is my go-to, I buy that for guests for friends. It is just because it actually looks like a lipstick. Yeah, it really does. And it's powerful. It's powerful. It has many, it has different settings that you would love. And then, you know, for people who have kids, you know, you don't have to worry about them finding it and being like oh my god, you know, it's really easy to Just greet with my lip her tangling. Oh

Is anyone blowing on? Okay, don't come up other favorites is The turbo it's one of our new ruins. Oh, I don't know it. It's strong. It's a little thick and I just love it It's it's it's terrible like juice. Yes, insortable. Okay, and then I also love the cuddle because it has a little curve to it so I love that one and You know, I mean the The happiness enjoy is always one of my favorites because it vibrates to music. Yeah Yeah, you really want to be adventurous. I love that. Yeah.

But some of the none vibe products that we have that I think are great. Like, okay, they're going to show on the housewives of this on the next episode. We're tired and I have like a little fun time. Nice. We bring out the bedroom candy body chocolate It's chocolate body paint and basically we give you the brush with along with it But you can warm the chocolate up and you can like I like it when he kind of paints his name or whatever he wants I'm in licks it off. It is so good Yeah, so good or either like our candles. I always tell people you have to have our melting massage oil candles Because it goes straight from you know, you light them up. We call them like my fire You light them up. We have different flavors and when it melts you can pour it directly on the skin and it won't burn

Right people think it's waxy Yeah, it's not it turns into massage oil and you massage it in and it feels so good You can lick it off. It's just so great. Oh my god. Oh, you should you test them all out for yeah, okay? I'm the masturbator tester Get it that's hot. It's okay So I knew I know that Todd knew you a little before you guys started dating Did he embrace all this stuff right away? That was my next question too. Yeah, did you start?

Or was he a little scared? I'm keeping 100. I would be scared. I'll be a little. Well, he started busing out the whole line. No, I think that he had some chicks who probably were freaky or than I was before he met me. So he was open to.

He was all about it. Yeah, he was all about it. It's almost like he can't be with someone who's not at this point right in life. I would be bored if I did not have a man who was you know kind of open mind it to Trying things in the bedroom like definitely like even like when we first did our Our helping hand which is like you know our what do you call that for other companies? Where, you know, it's for the man, the man he can insert himself in. Yeah, the masturbation sleeve, right. Okay.

Well, ours is called helping hand. Okay. So when we first, I wanted to try it out. So I put a little by loop in it and see ours has a hole on both sides. So as I'm using it on him and giving him a helping hand, I also have my mouth on the other end. So I'm able to catch the. Right. It's like a blowjob helper. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah. So for women who have a problem with catching their men's come in their mouth. Right. They can catch it inside the sleeve

and it will still feel good to him because it feels like a good time. Right, it's happening. Do you know what I thought you were gonna say there? And you're comfortable talking about this stuff. But a question I get asked all the time, especially Thanksgiving dinner, which was interesting with a generation of women,

as much as a friends, it was like a grandmother or a mother or a daughter. And they were like, my job's so exhausting. I just wanted to be over with, my jaw hurts, it's like a grandmother or a mother or a daughter. And they were like, blow job so exhausting. Like I just wanted to be over with my jaw hurts. So, right? Do you get asked that? They're like, I don't want to do it. It's not just the taste.

It's everything. Right. Let's see. That's the problem. If you don't like doing it, then you're not going to be good at it. Yeah. But that's why I also tell people who don't like giving a blow job to their man, they definitely need to get like our bedroom

candy helping him because then you could play with his penis. Only you don't have to totally suck the whole time and he's still into it. He feels good and you know, it gives you something. It's like a blowjob hack. Yes, yes. But for me, I love to do it. I love to give my man And he loves it in his grip right?

You're fine, but but I'm spraying exactly You got a super happy now, but it is kind of the top things. What are the other big quiet? I'm so he's wondering because it's so nice to have another woman who's in this world of sex But what are some of the the questions that come up like maybe at the parties or just in your life. Like is there like a common question that when you're a girl eventually can't you gotta talk about blank like what comes up lately? Well I mean speaking of okay when we just talked about giving kid but receiving it. Yeah. I had a friend who actually told me that she did not like when her man gave her oral sex.

Yeah. I said that's because he doesn't know what he's doing. It's no way. You're speaking to Emily's heart, by the way. Yes. No, if it won't make you solve that. I've all about it. I'm like, come on.

You got to be like, OK, at this point, you might need to try somebody out. Or how about you get some educational tools or listen to sex with Emily so she can tell you exactly where you need to go with this. Right because, um, you know, you have, I mean, to me, oral sex is just part of foreplay. Like that's a natural part of foreplay. Right. And I hate when people are not open to it. You know, it's the women. So for I hear that for women all the time, like in fact, recently a friend was like, she's like, I used to love it. She's been with her husband for a while now. Probably 20 years. She's like, you know, I used to love it. But now I just like, oh, when he goes down there,

it just doesn't feel good anymore. And I think there's so much about, she's probably stressed about the kids and like, you got to kind of relax into your, I know. But it's like, it's going to take a while. No, okay. This is why this is when it doesn't take a while And that's why I say like for me like I love to have like either candy kisses or even like a um Like the other one I was telling you about the turbo Right like I like to have a vibe inserted in while he's Looking like it right when I tell you it's like It's like heaven opened up,

it's doors and I floated up. Exactly, exactly. We will definitely make it go by quicker and faster. So for a safe instance, if you are somebody who doesn't like giving a oral sex to a woman, but that's what your woman likes, then it would help you to have a toy in certain,

and while you give it or it's like because it will make it go by really quick right and she'll just melt exactly or it also you can use a literal toy but he gets someone using his fingers and also use a little yeah yeah yeah definitely right and then so anything just use a toy it's a toy yeah something and I think some women too and this goes back to the um, and I think again, this is why I love the idea of having group parties. I've been wanting to do them. Like, I was even talking to people. I was like, we should do one here because my friends always like, kind of come look at you because that whole closet behind you is like filled with

toys. Well, we should join up and have a party together. I would love that because I'm just like, I really, because I truly, my heart, thank God, for 11 years, I want to help every single woman. Like, I'm at the dry cleaner dry cleaner I'm like even an orgasm can I bring you back a toy like I want to help you but I feel like a lot of it is self-confidence and there's a lot of women who don't have that confidence in their body they don't feel sexy they're still in securities but they might not want oral because they think that something's wrong down there. No no no no as long as you keep it clean and it smells good okay okay, let's work with it.

Now, if it doesn't smell good or it doesn't, you know, you might need to go and get your check or whatever. And we also have other products that are good, you know, body safe products that will keep you clean and fresh. Okay, so, but with that being said, I feel like, if you are a person who's insecure about your look, if you are there with somebody who wants to be with you,

stop being insecure. Because there are girls who are dropped-egg or just who doesn't, they don't have anybody. You are there with somebody who wants to be with you at that moment. He's there. He's not thinking, oh, that lip is a little... Exactly.

And I'm telling you, I mean, sometimes I feel like, you know, my body isn't where I want it to be or whatever, whatever. And so what, who cares? He's still loving it, it feels good to him. And I'm gonna give it to him. Like, I know it's the best thing popping. Exactly, that's what makes it sexy.

If you come in the room and you're confident and you feel like you're putting it down, then he's gonna feel like he's holding. Exactly. He got it just that. I've said it forever. Like guys are so simple, you know? Like don't overthink. Like they're not thinking about so many things that you're thinking. No, no, we're so worried. He's gonna notice that I got this little dimple here.

One of my left breasts is bigger than my right. You're in bed with him. He's really doing all right now. That's the last thing. He's waiting for your lips to get around his penis and he's waiting for the side of you. Exactly. That's not on his back. And come with the best tricks. Hello, come with the best tricks. Give the best head. Ride the best. Okay. That is a good, that is a good, when we come back, we're taking a quick break. I want to hear your best tricks.

Okay, big shout out to our sponsors. Thank you everyone for supporting our sponsors. We love you and when we were back with Candy's best BJ tricks. I love it. I've got the solution to a problem that more than 30 million women encounter in their life. I bet you know what it is.

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Okay everyone, thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. We are back with Candy, whereas from the real house, we're doing with Landa, and she's got her candy line, bedroom candy. Okay, let's talk about that. Let's talk about riding it and doing it right and some of the best tricks. You said women gotta come arm with tricks.

Yes, I do think. I mean, you want to keep things spicy and new and different. You know, I want to get monotonous because it gets boring. You want to just sometimes do something unexpected, okay? So, okay. And this is one that I personally loved when it was done to me before, you know? Okay, so this is one that I personally loved when it was done to me before. You know, okay, so this is something simple.

Let's say you run him a bath, right? But you tie something, blindfold him. Then you bring in a tray and it has to have like a cup of whipped cream, a cup of chocolate, and a cup of caramel. And then you have, you you have different fruits, right? So you could dip a piece of banana in the chocolate and feed it to him. He doesn't know what's coming.

Then you dip the strawberry and whipped cream and feed it to him. Then you dip something else and another fruit in there and you feed it to him. And next thing you dip your finger in the chocolate and put it in his mouth and he's like whoa, what was that? That was not fruit. Okay, then you go back to the fruit and then you come back with the nipple. Oh, my God. So he's like, it's like a surprise every time something comes in his mouth, it's something that's a surprise. Wait, I love this tip. This is so good. Because I'm always

talking about blindfolds, but I'm always saying doing by the bed with maybe some ice and different sensations, but I love the fruit and the dipping in them. Can you use your chocolate, candy chocolate sauce? Yes, you can. I mean, the bedroom candy body paint, you can use the chocolate sauce for anything. Because it's edible.

It's vegan-friendly, OK? All of our products are, so check it out. But yeah, it's something that's simple, this easy to do. And then it's something, it's really just about variety and doing something different. Like how many guys have had that done to them? Like not.

Probably not. And then the other one, Mance like feed me pizza with lime. Yeah, do a pizza and then talk about. I'm not sure we've heard this one before. And I told somebody else this recently, it's like you could take either a peach or you can take a pineapple, but you just cut it all around, shave it around,

and then cut a hole in the center. OK. Warm it up a little and stick it. When you're giving your man head, you stick his penis in the middle of the fruit. And you use it just like you use the help of hand, you know, jack him off with it while you're giving him head. Wow. And so it's taste good because it's sweet.

So like let's say we use the pineapple, you sticking his, you sticking his dick inside of a warm pineapple and you're giving him head with it. Wow. It's great. I thought it might have been a lanyard thing, George's peaches. You know, I know. You know, but a pineapple. No, just make sure it's not too hot when you warm it up.

No, right. You don't want to do it too hot. That's amazing. So because it tastes good because if you're not, you will be bad. You want a pineapple, Veeja? Well, I'm sure because you've warmed up. I'm sure it feels really good. Yeah.

Again, but if you don't warm it up too much. Because you know, it makes it softer. It makes the fruit get a little soft, so it's easy to mold around. It's really easy. Right. And you could just use it and go up and down and then it tastes good.

If you don't love the taste of a seaman, for example, it will taste like pineapple. At the end, you just get some juices and it those are some good tips. I agree, just update your toolkit. Like update, you know, it doesn't take much. Like if you've been with someone for a while and you keep kind of, we all kind of fall into our routes

we're doing the same things and you do one day you show up with a warm peach. Yeah. You get points there. You got a blowjob to remember. One for the book. Yeah, and I think sometimes sex can start before we even get home, right? So like we have our bedroom candy control me Which is like it's like a little vibe that sits inside of the pocket of your panties, right?

But it comes with a remote so let's say you put the panties on with a vibrator And then you give your man the remote as you walk out the door and say control me And so every time he feels like it, he can turn you on literally. Right. I love the turning you on. We always have to vibrate. I didn't know that you guys really, like you're right, man. I was like three toys and now it's like 500.

Yeah. I love the vibrating panty trick because that is so fun at a party. It's like, we're playing and then you get home, like. And nobody else in the room knows that you two are playing this little game with each other. Yeah, you know? If people want to see what we're talking about, what's the website? That what is it?

So it's bedroomcandy.com, and it's K-A-N-D-I. All right. Bedroomcandy. People can browse the website as we talk. Yeah, and they could also host their own parties, which I want to talk to you, but I want to do one. Like I just want to want to do one like I love you to have one and I want to be there so we can You come back to LA. Yeah, I mean I would come for that you come for a better game party And you will come to so and the people are interested also I know I just heard about this that they could they could host their own parties

They can become a bedroom candy. Yeah, if you want to become a bedroom candy consultant, honestly, it is a great idea because, I mean, you can make up to 60% of whatever you sell. So it's a lot of consultants out here will have been with us that have been able to make that their business so that they don't have to work for anyone else. They have that room candy.

Or even as their side business to totally pay off their debt and all that stuff. And how fun is that if you get to like, it's like, you're writing all your friends over. And this is the kind of, I just know from my life, it will grow. You'll tell all your other friends, you get to get down, you have some champagne, you buy friends over and you're showing them these toys. So that would be bedroomcandy.com with a K. And then if you go slash Emily, we have this, we just, we just found this out that if you want to send up as a consultant and if you enter code Emily 30, check out, you can save 30% off your starter kit so you can just try it out.

You can just see like how are all my friends gonna buy these toys and I can tell you that wherever I've gone in the world, all my friends, there's been nobody, even the ones I like, they're never reading this, they're the ones who want. Yeah, I mean, it's so funny because it's like, you know, most people that become consultants, they'll start off with just their personal friends. And they're like, okay, but you never have a party where you don't sail anything. Like it's as long as you're having fun, everybody's open to try something. Right. You know, and you know, we have more than just, you know,

the actual toys, we have more than just the actual toys. We have the candles that I was talking about that milk and turn it to massager. We have the body chocolate. We have so many things. And you stuff for men now too, a lot of really cool men products too. Oh yes.

Like the lobes and the legs. Yes, we have a lot of great things. We even have some anal play toy. Play toy. Anal's huge. OK, so I've been talking about anal obviously for a long time and saying, like, prostate, like men like figure their prostate, it's there.

Like what if you, you know, you're on your deathbed and you're like, oh my God, that felt amazing. And my whole life I could have been having this like prostate orgasm. Yeah. Some men are not open to that. True. And you know, and I don't feel like you should force them on anybody. But if they are open to it, you know, they fool and brace it.

I mean, like everyone else. you should force it on anybody but if they are open to it you know they fall in the race. I was just saying to Howard Stern and there's another radio host he's like professional skateboarder back in the day he's crazy guys names Jason Ellis and he started embracing it and now he was like all about it. I was on a show I'd see Zika that's like that the first thing. Yeah so last time my girlfriend was taking her finger on it, but come for you! How and how was that for you? Tell me more. It is not for everybody though, and you gotta try

to tell everybody what you're doing. You're talking about pegging and all kinds of things. Pagging's the only thing. We actually have a couple of the same sex toys that's coming, but we have the, what is it? Strap-less strap on. What is a suction to your pubic mind? No, it's actually it.

It's a little piece that will insert inside the givers. Okay. vagina and when she's giving to the vibrates in front of it can vibrate to both. Yeah, like a double. Yeah, it's like, yeah, it's like curves. Yes, no, I've seen those. I've heard of those.

Yeah. That's. Just take it to the next level. And then what do you want? And you can take something out with you. This is fun. Oh my god. I love this.

OK. Do you want to, you're here. I'm going to have you help us answer some questions. OK. We get a lot of questions from listeners. And we love having me blops out. So thank you everybody for emailing me feedback. It's like, oh, no, actually, here's how you do it now. All right. If you have a question you want

to answer on the show, love that. And now it's easier than ever. Go to sexwithelm.com. And you got to look at we got to drop down, go to ask Emily. And now you can ask the questions straight from the site. And you can also say, check, I'd like to be called. We're setting up phone calls now so we can start setting up a time. Assistant producer Eddie will call you and we'll take your call in the show.

Awesome, that's cool. So and you can also leave us a voicemail eight when a Ask SWE1. And as always, we love. When you include your name, your age, where you live, and how you listen to the show. OK. First one's about sex toys.

How about that? Hey, Dr. Emily, I will listen to your show for the past few months. I love it. My question is this. My boyfriend, I've almost two years, is skittish about sex toys. He thinks I want them because I'm bored in the bedroom.

He thinks if I want a toy that means he's not doing a good job in the bedroom, truth is, he's doing a great job. He brings me to orgasm so much more than any previous relationships, including my ex-husband, who was very, very giving him bed. I used to have a ton of toys, but I've since got rid of them since they were fairly outdated, used with previous partners and just antiquated. I want the wee vibe touch, the womanizer, some others, and he's so afraid that it's because I'm unsatisfied.

What would you suggest to help lubricate him toward the idea? Thanks so much, age, Mary age 35 from Guam, believing in Indiana, the whitest state in the country. I listened to the podcast on an Android. You know what I found so funny about this? Is after 11 years, this was the question I got asked. I used to have to, my caveat, any time before I talked about Toyota, I was like, OK, guys, it's not going to replace you.

It can't cuddle. Exactly. So when this still comes up, it's like, oh, interesting. I understand it. A lot of men are threatened by it. And I get that he's worried that he's not being satisfied. He's going to be replaced.

And I thought, candy's eyes are like, really? You say that thing. I get this question a million times a day. I loved, OK? So I'd love to hear. I talk about it. I would love to hear where you say to these people. Well, I totally agree with you about saying

that this is not to replace you. It's just only to add some spice and enhance you enhance you. So the thing that I always tell women is if you want to introduce one, introduce something that absolutely will not intimidate him at all. So that's why the candy kisses. The one that looks like the lipstick is the perfect one because when a man sees it He's like, oh, it's a cute little lipstick. He is like, oh, yeah, it's not a big deal because it doesn't even compare to him Physically, it's not it's not big. It's not you know, but it gives you a little bit of that power that you need So you know, if you tell him babe, I just want you know why you kissing me down there

I want you to play with it. I mean, you know play with me down there while you kissing it He won't mind doing it because it's just like I just might don't my wife's little lipstick I was no big deal and then he'll start seeing your reaction and that will make him like it more or Either like the vibrating panties, you know, that's an introduction. Exactly, but we have some, you know powerful toys Like say for instance the hip hop or even with the make me over which looks like a makeup compact, which will allow him to say. When you know, it has the little hand just like how a makeup compact is, you know, it's like a powder puff that has a handle on it. Well, when he puts his hand on it, he can be hitting you from the back while he's holding it up against the front of you. Right. You know, I mean, I like advice starting off really small because as a man, I think

oh, sex toys like huge dicks. You're thinking of big dildo, phallic thing. Exactly. And it never, you know, so guys will get intimidated by that. They're like, wait a minute. I'm here. What do you need that for? Exactly. But if it's something small, they won't mind it. Now another thing is like, say for instance, our hip hop, it's kind of strong, right? But like say for instance, when you're giving your man head, he sees this little small little hip hop toy that we have, right? But when you, if you let the vibration be under your chin,

and he feels it at the base of his penis while you're giving him head, or at the, you know, his balls, and he's feeling the vibration. He's gonna be like oh my god it feels good because it's like subtle but it's intense you give me head and he feels the vibration as well. Right men like the vibrations too they just don't know it yet. Yeah yeah I think that's true I feel like it's just like always it's like a kutra bomb I mean mean, it's not like it's replacing you. It's like if you had this hot butt sundae and you like your hot butt sundae, you know,

and you're getting it, you get the, you know, you get the cherries, you get the whipped cream, you've got the ice cream, and it's great. And you're like enjoying it. And someone's like, you want to try a few sprinkles? You're like, oh, yeah, that's really good too. It's not better, but there were some sprinkles on it. You're adding to it. It's not., but there were some sprinkles on it. You're adding to it.

It's not- A girl, get one of those a little strong vibe and put it on the side of your mouth while you get in the hand. And he feels that vibration coming through your mouth. He's like, whoa, let's keep this to it now. Right, and the lipstick one is good for that too. No, I agree. And that's what I just tried to explain.

You do the lipstick, you do the thing, and don't forget anything that's larger than he is. Or anything, nothing fall. There's a lot of great options now. So what you gotta do? lipstick you think and don't forget anything that's larger than he is or anything yeah nothing felt like you we've there's a lot of great options now so what you gotta do another question it's crazy that that's that's little you know comment of starting off small like I don't think we've ever talked about that before oh really because immediately like bringing sex toys and relationship like I said before I just think huge vibrators anything like that

Never never thought about like okay. Yeah, we can start off with something like really really small like lipstick Oh, yeah, no, we say a little time. I'm thinking like rabbit, you know Crazy do not walk in with your rabbit No, nothing actually nothing I say no, but like one penis I say no, no. And then we have one penis in the room. Yeah, yeah. His penis. It never occurred to me as something that's something that small. Yeah.

It's always something big. I love it. You're still learning. Yeah. So great. That's awesome. So good. Yeah.

Okay. Okay. So let this one have that goes, Mary, but go for it. Don't just throw it at your toy. It's crazy that she mentioned that she's from Guam because my buddy's married to a nice lady from Guam and he says that girls from Guam are like the biggest freaks on the planet. I love you. Super freaky.

Are you serious? I know it's like a dude from Guam. I know it's like a dude from Guam. They're super freaks. And now she's stuck with a boy guy. And now she's in Indiana though. She's gonna change him after listening to the show. Yeah, she is. I hope so and also I always tell you guys

If you're with your partner and you're having a hard time like kind of having that conversation You we talk a lot about communication on the show listen to the show together. Yeah Mary He doesn't listen to this one because you talked about him But we got thousands of other podcasts that I agree. It's just a bridge Just you know you don't have to bring it up. With that lipstick. Okay. We'll give you one, two minutes. All right.

Okay, so let's get to another one here. Dear Emily, I was married for 27 years. Oh, I was married for 27 years. I've had some health issues and I'm unable to exercise. I still don't consider myself fat. I know I'm pretty, however, I do have a lot of salulating on my legs and very flat chested. I'm so self-conscious of this. I want to date, I do it quite often, butulay on my legs and very flat chested. I'm so self conscious of this.

I want to date, I do it quite often, but I'm afraid to go to the next step of having sex because I'm afraid of looking less in their eyes. I love sex and I would like to do fun, interesting things. I haven't in my 27 year marriage, but can't get over this. And he said, Justin, tell me through this. It's her 27 year marriage. She's a baby. She was married.

No, she's married now married now no she's divorced now She was made for 27. Oh, okay, so now she's 57 I'm just trying to get out there and date again and not feeling great about herself What we talked about earlier guys love it. Yeah What do you think they they are gonna dislike more not ever having sex, or just knowing that you have, boo, so I don't think he'd be more angry about not having sex. I know, right?

We're on our heads, we're on those critics. We're touching, judging, judging. Eyes don't care. Yeah, one sees inside of it. He sees good. Whatever. You got them. So she's just putting a lot of pressure on herself,

because she's just getting back into the dating scene if that wasn't clear. So I say just take some time too, you know you trust a guy tell you know someone you don't have to have sex right away And work on masturbation means for me like when I'm going through You know I'm not dating or I mean it's been a while, but when I'm just not feeling I masturbate a lot I get my mojo back on my own and you start feeling good and knowing your body and if you have that sexual energy flowing Because when it's shut down it's shut down. So make sure you were somebody trust, start masturbating, loving your body, looking in the mirror, being

like, you're walk around naked, I'm telling you this works. These exercises work when you're naked and you're like, I am beautiful. I just say it until you believe it, it will work. It does. Or you can just go outside and you'll have guys firing on you. They'll be okay. You'll be all right. Okay, one more question. All right.

We got to go. Okay, hey Emily, my wife and I have a pretty steamy sex life that's almost 100% of the time comes at my prompting and suggestion. How do I convey to my wife that when she initiates the acts I love, it makes sex a thousand times hotter. I'm always prompting or hinting or do things I love, while also being considerate of her needs and not asking of it too much. I've told her several times that when she spontaneously offers

to do an act I love, it just makes me wild about her. Mind you, I'm not asking for these things daily or even weekly yet, I'm always having to ask or suggest what do I do Will age 31 So, you know, it sounds like he's having great sex like when the sex happens. It's great But he wants her to initiate sex more and and and I can see what he says it like hinting He says he's hinting sometimes hinting doesn't always do the trick And I think that a lot of couples fall into this rut because they say well, I told them I told her I told her I told her I needed this.

This is a new behavior. We're trying to teach someone how to initiate for whatever reasons she's not comfortable initiating a lot of times men aren't comfortable in this shooting. We hear the same things. And so he kind of has to break it down for I think I think he's got to say, you know, I've told you in the past, I love when you initiate sex with me, and I look forward to it, and here's what my, what it might look like for me. You can even tell her, when you come home, when she gets her, you're like,

oh, you're right now if you came over and started kissing me, that would feel good. Or we could hint to her. Text her in the middle of it. But I thought he said, he told her already. It sounds like he's dancing around everything. Let me ask Candy, okay., well, it sounds like he's dancing around everything. Yeah, we asked Candy, okay.

What about if it sounds like he's dancing around the subject by hinting everything? What about if a guy just came straight up to you and we're like, all right, this is the deal. You know, you're not, like would you be off-putted by that if he was just trying to... I mean, it's not because that's my husband, so... Yeah, it's just that it's...

It tells you. Yeah. I mean, I'm not gonna lie sometimes you know my husband and I we've gone back and forth with that like I'm tired of being the one who's initiating you need to initiate and back and forth so you know you definitely have to continue to say what you want and maybe you should maybe like you said maybe he should drop off a gift of something that he wants her to wear.

Right. Right. I've been thinking about you all day in this. Like, I would love you to come home and be wearing this. Yeah. Yeah. Be wearing this out. Why don't you have that on when I get back, get there.

Yeah. Little suggestions. Yeah. And I think that the other thing is that he can also go further to say that it's not only that I like kind of want. I actually require it, I actually need it from you. It would make you feel really, really good if you came in because when you do that, it makes me feel like it's hard will, you may not use this verbiage, but it makes me feel desired.

And so this got me thinking that I'm meeting these things from you, what might you be needing for me in our sex life? Like this might be a great way for them to start talking about sex. Yeah, and I was like a therapy session. But what might you need for me? Yeah, I need. Okay, but listen, these things, you got to be awesome. I mean, yeah, I think, I think, you know, I was like, I like what you said before.

He should text and be like, hey, when I get home, I want you to have one that thing that I love that you wear. And I'm happy. Drop your knees. Yeah, be more direct, but not demanding. Be direct. See what she says. Yeah.

These are feet right, exactly, because he's hinting, hinting, hinting, hinting. He doesn't respond and check her phone, see who she's texting. Who she's saying? Who else is banging? Yeah. But the thing is that I think that the main point is you're right. I get therapy, therapy is good.

That's what I do. And I want couples to talk because they don't know how to talk about it. But I also don't, couples get very frustrated because they think a hint and talking about it one, two, even three times is going to change a lifelong behavior. She maybe she's never initiated sex in her life. She's never done it. Or maybe they should make it a game. Make it a game.

Be like, you know, every other Wednesday, you're gonna have to come up with a different way to turn me on. And this is a game. I love it. Put on the calendar. Who does it the best? And so it's like a competition at that point

for her to figure out ways to outdo him. Yeah, that's, I love that. I love that. And you guys could track it. There's probably an app for that. I don't know outdo him. Yeah, that's, I love that. I love that. And you guys could track it. There's probably a nap for that. I don't know. Put on the calendar, right? And then again, with so many great products out there,

it's like one night, like they're putting this on, and they're like tickling the start. What is this? The, oh, kiss and tangle. Yeah, kiss and tangle. Like I want this every night, but maybe one night, like if you just go shopping and you're using, like really, you have products, like we're going to try out the vibrating panties on Saturday night. Hi, like if you just go shopping and you're using like really you products like we're going to try the vibrating panties that's there. Hi, like

that's that's what you do. Yeah. Have some fun with sexy. Well that's just that's what I want. We make it so difficult. For 2017 I say we have to have a game every Wednesday and it's a competition and every month we're gonna figure out who does it best. Yeah. I like that. I think we should launch a sex-themed game like that sponsor right bedroom candy. This is awesome. Thank you so much for your who does it best. Yeah, I like that. The ladies are the amazing. I think we should launch a sex-domy game like that. Sponsor by bedroom candy. Yeah. Some of these toys.

This is awesome. Thank you so much for your tips. Oh, this is amazing. And I, you're like, what? Yeah. No, you've already been great. Am I enjoyable? Thank you so much.

You have been amazing. And I'm so glad you're here. I'm so proud of all the work you're doing. Just, it's amazing. I love your bedroom. Candy line. All your success. I love your bedroom, Candyline. All your success in my housewives, just all your businesses, and just a great role model.

I love it you're here. I really want people to check this out, because I actually do want to do a part of your. I was talking to some people, like, work with you, Brian, so you guys, I want, why aren't I doing parties? It helps people, and your friends, it's a way to get together with people, become a representative of you guys, I want, why aren't I doing parties? Like, it helps people and your friends, it's a way to get together with people,

become a representative of the bedroom candy line, which I literally just try it once, and I swear to God, like you might be quitting your day job if you do one day that, which most people do. Okay, and if you're interested in having a bedroom candy party of your own, or just want to learn more about it, bedroomcandy.com slash Emily, and apparently till February, code Emily30 at checkout,

and you save 30% on your start-to-kit, or just check out these co-products. Cause they're awesome. One more thing, Candy, before you go, I've got five questions for you. Rapid fire, we ask all of our guests. Here we go. Okay.

Candy, what's your biggest turn on? You mean another person know what they're doing to me? Anything. It's what yeah, either. Oh, looking on my nipples or eating my pussy. I almost could end here, but biggest turn off. A person who doesn't know how to eat pussy. Only sisters. Please use the place you've ever gotten busy. Who doesn't know how to eat this? Oh, my sisters. Please use the place you've ever gotten busy.

Oh, I don't know. Oh, out in a park. Like, I was on a picnic park. Do you have any picnic I've done that Yeah, picnic park. Do you have any picnic after that, too? Park. Sexiest word to you. What? What? What?

What? What? I'm glad you said what? What? Is that Southern accent? That's Southern accent. It is Southern accent. What's the one thing you wish you could tell men

about female pleasure? Do you think all men need to know? Take your time, don't rush it, kiss softly, and never put a dry finger in a woman. Always lick your fingers. And see. And see. That's awesome.

Thank you so much, Candy. And people can find you, tell me like, are your social media. It'll all be on our website too, but you're at Candy everywhere. I'm at Candy on Twitter and Instagram. My Facebook does have Candy Burris, which my last name is B-U-R-R-U-S-S. But yeah. Everywhere. I'm gonna get all the love. So you can find Candy. Just Google Candy. Even if you spell wrong, it'll be Candy. It'll come up. Okay, everyone, thank you so much.

Thank you, Menace. Thank you. Five menace at Menace. Everywhere. It's actually Emily. And thanks everyone for listening. Thank you to my amazing team. Thank you, Madison, Jamie, Eddie, Ken, Laurie. I love you all.

And thanks for listening. Was it good for you? Email me. Feedback at sexuallyecu.com. Emily.com. MUSIC All right people, it's time to introduce you to something that combines two of my favorite topics, oral sex and lube.

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a flavored water-based personal lubricant that is sugar-free, paraben-free, and the perfect addition to any and all forms of for-play. So next time you're craving something sweet, skip through a fridge or and go straight to the bedroom. With Joe's gelato lube line, you are the dessert. Go to my site, click on the gelato banner or go to my store to shop the complete selection of Joe lubricants. There's a formulation for every occasion. Trust me. So if you're ready to be dessert or just some gelato for yourself at sexwithenley.com today. Let's talk about the orgasm gap. You don't know what the orgasm gap is? Okay, so a little refresher. Men take anywhere between six to eight minutes to orgasm during

intercourse. Women between 20 and 40 minutes. You see the issue here? There's like a gap. between 20 and 40 minutes. You see the issue here? There's like a gap. Even if you don't have an issue with premature ejaculation, the fact remains we may take longer to achieve orgasm in the menu. A lot longer, but you can take action. You can. For starters, more for play. For plays not just a suggestion, it's actually mandatory. And to help you narrow the orgasm of getptery, and of course, even more, try promising. See, promising is a clinically proven FDA-proof product that can significantly delay ejaculation. So why is that a good thing? Because if you're able to less-songer,

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That more orgasms? God, that sounds good. Permessent is a topical spray that gets applied to the penis to a proven man's stamina. Unlike common delay sprays that make you numb, permessent is quickly absorbed, allowing you to enjoy the sensations of sex. When used properly, it won't transfer to your partner, which trust me, nobody likes.

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