Sex With Emily - Happy, Healthy & Fearlessly Sexy with Fran Drescher

Episode Date: November 2, 2019

On today’s show, actress, writer & activist Fran Drescher, aka “The Nanny,” is joining Dr. Emily & the two of them are talking about ways to live the most fruitful & healthy life possible. They chat about the importance of being a medical consumer – not just a patient, how to make a “clean” living, and why getting multiple doctor opinions might just save your life. Plus, they talk about sexual trauma and a few ways to heal so you can get back to a healthy sex life. Follow Emily on all social: @sexwithemilyFor even more sex talk, tips, & tricks visit sexwithemily.comFor more information on Fran Drescher, click HERE.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You know, I realize that we're looking at the problem completely wrong. We're trying to solve the end symptom, trying to fix this breast or that testicle or this cancer. And it would not look in a causation. Why are we getting sick in the first place? Let's find out what's causing us to get sick in the first place and eliminate it. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily and on today's show, I'm joined by actress writer and eliminated. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily and on today's show I'm joined by actress writer and activist, you probably know her as the nanny, Fran Drescher.

Topics include why it's so important to be more than just a patient, but a medical consumer. Well, we'll tell you what that is. What you can do for your health to ensure you're living your best life possible, a.k.a. clean living, but it's not as hard as you think. A couple of ways to overcome trauma and get back to a healthy sex life and why second, third, and sometimes fourth opinions, go on your doctor, matter. All this and more, thanks for listening. Into his eyes They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex Eyes that mock our sacred institutions

Betrubized they call them in a fight on day Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute The girls got a hair stand Oh my The women know about shrinkage Isn't it common, Emily? What do you mean, like laundry? It's drinks

Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my God, I'm off here. So, I'm drunk. Being bad feels pretty good. You know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information check out sexwithemily.com.

You're gonna love our site and follow us on all social media. It's at Sex with Emily across the board. And you can find me on Siri Sex and Radio five nights a week. I can answer your questions there. Monday through Friday, five to seven pan Pacific on stars, one, oh nine. And you can also just call me, triplate nine, four, seven, eight, two, seven, seven,

or get a free 30 day trial at sexwithemily.com slash SXM. Also, if you haven't heard the news, and you haven't seen it yet, you've got to check out my Sex with Emily Vesper, which essentially is the coolest piece of jewelry slash vibrator you've ever had. It's an elegant vibrator. You wear as an necklace. It's really strong. It's USB rechargeable, and then you can get this limited edition phrases that I wrote for

you. It's I Comfirst, Turn Me On, or Meditate, Maths Rate, Manifest. You guys have been loving them. I never take it off a guess as a vibrator and it works. Great conversation piece, super empowering and you always have your vibe with you. And you can find that at sexwithemily.com slash Vesper. All right, guys. I hope you enjoy this interview with Fran Drescher.

I am so excited to welcome my guest. I have Fran Drescher's here. And she is, you've no friend. I think I'll know you from Danny. I hope so, she. You're a legend, I love you. I'm so happy that you're here. We're all so excited.

We all have our moments of like our favorite like Fran moments. But what you've been doing. Tell me I didn't realize you were a doctor. Yeah, I'm a doctor of human sexuality. Not a medical doctor, but I study human sexuality. We got a doctorate. Yeah.

Good for you. Thank you. Excellent. That's what I do. I help people. Yeah, you know, I am. Maybe next year we should have you speak at our summit. Yes.

Well, that's one thing I was looking at your. All year we curate the most fantastic speakers Oh, I would love to speak at your summit. So this is we were here to talk about many things So let's talk about that you're having a November 2nd you're having a summit. Yeah, Los Angeles I'm masterclass house summit at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion in the Los Angeles Music Center You could get your tickets at can.cancelashmance.org. And I'll be there in all year I've curated amazing doctors to blow your mind. Basically, people don't even want to go to the restroom because for fear, they're going

to miss something. And it's just one powerful talk after another that covers the gamut of global health. And it's fantastic. And you walk away with a lot of tools and call to action and motivation and education to really start rethinking everything that you do. Now, tell me about it. So it's a women's health. Well, we're in every women's health. When you're in an organization,

the Cancer Shmance Movement is a fundraiser for Cancer Shmance, but our kind of fundraiser is putting on a real education program of doing what we do, of actually showing you what we're about. And we're a health organization, Cancer Shmance Movement. We started focusing on women because I may gynecologic cancer survivor, but very shortly after we started, I began to see that the problem with, you know, this unhealthy paradigm in this country is not about a particular

agenda or even a particular body part is about how we're living how we're exposing ourselves to a Cacophony of chemicals and carcinogens and toxins and we have to stop that because how you live Equals how you feel and well, let's okay. So yeah, all of that. Yes. Yes. Yes. We were talking before when she first got in here like water bottles Like plastic. Why are we drinking out of plastic? So it's also bad for us, but I want to back up to your story. And you have for the planet. You have for the planet.

And where one big living, interdependent organism, so. But I think we're just starting to get it. But like not everyone, not every road, not every time. One other thing is when you look at, you know, like the human history, there are these pockets where we go into dark ages and we get dumbed down and numbed out to things that maybe other people knew. We're getting close to understanding that we must live at one with the natural world, but truth be told, the indigenous cultures

have known that for eons. I know, eons. I know it's true. It's true, but we're just I mean, well, but the thing you're right and I hope that we're getting there And I love that you're putting on this summit and it's been so successful But I just want to go back to something you said because you that you have cancer and that's kind of been We always say the silver like you know silver lining or lemonade our lemon Like you successful actress super driven and you were were just going, going, going, going, working it, working it, as you know, a lot of us do here.

And then you were misdiagnosed. You had pariamen-aposal symptoms. So who doesn't, right? I mean, I do, I know what you're saying. And they're like, no, no, it's just you and the go-to, you know, go home and sometimes the gynecologist tell women, get a glass of wine, take hormones, put some synthetic hormones,

it turns out you would cancer. Right. And, you know, I was very lucky that even at the end of two years, in eight doctors, I was still in stage one. So I had a slow growing cancer. If it was a varying cancer, I'm sure I wouldn't be sitting here talking to you right now. And the more I wrote a narytime specialler by the same name cancer. Cancer. And this is also when I just want to say this, you guys, if you right now. And the more I wrote a narrative time special about the same name, cancer, and... Cancer, and this is also, I just want to say this, you guys, if you want to go to the organization,

you want to go to her health summit, on November 2nd, Fran Drescher's health summit, it is groundbreaking, you should go, we're putting it in our show notes, go to sexwithm.ly.com, you can click on the link there. Thank you.

So, okay. Okay, I just want them to know. Yeah, I appreciate that. I appreciate that. I appreciate that. You know, I realize want them to know. Yeah, I appreciate that. Yeah, I appreciate that. You know, I realized that we're looking at the problem completely wrong. We're trying to solve the end symptom, trying to fix this breast or that testicle or this cancer and it would not look in a causation. Why are we getting sick in the first place? Let's find out what's causing us to

get sick in the first place and eliminate it. Let's not get cancer in the first place. Let's find out what's causing us to get sick in the first place and eliminate it. Let's not get cancer in the first place. I was that for a cure. Well, that would be a great cure, but what you're saying is you had to get a second, which I always tell people get a second opinion, get a third opinion. You're right.

Your doctor doesn't know. I talk a lot about functional medicine, Eastern Western, and I think a lot of our listeners are all over the world, but all over this country for sure. Oh no, that's my phone. Wait a minute, I'm sorry. Usually it's me going off. Who's that? I like your ring now the world, but you know, all over this country for sure. Oh, no, that's my phone. Wait a minute, I'm sorry. Usually it's me going off.

Who's bad? I like your ring now. Oh, thanks. That's why you're happy. You look beautiful, by the way. Oh, you do, like your skin, could you come back another time, we'll just talk about your skin and regimen. But maybe it's all the thing.

It's all the thing. Thank you. It's the clean living. Organic. I sleep on my back. I talk to myself to sleep on my back. Yeah. And, you know, organic is key. Organic I sleep on my back. I taught myself to sleep on my back. Yeah, and

You know organic is key and organic products for your skin is very important. Okay, and then you know Balancing mind-body and spirit shows and Having a clean liver is really important Yeah, cuz your liver tells you everything about your skin and then there's so When you're getting a second opinion or third opinion, but what you decide was like, I feel like you are training people to become like medical consumers, you say. Right. We should be, we should be asking, bring a friend,

take notes, recline what your doctor's saying. Yes. Don't assume that I, because it's like doctors aren't gods. Not gods. Not gods. Yes. Of their own and their bludgeon by big business health insurance to go the least expensive route. Exactly. Doctors aren't gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods.

Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods.

Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods.

Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. Not gods. and ask that's a doctor for you. Move on, it's your life. Because when the doctor calls and tells you of cancer, at the end of the day, he goes home and eats dinner with his family. You go home and eat your heart out with yours. So it's your life, take control of it. And what we try to do is, you know, educate, motivate,

and activate people into taking control of their bodies. So what does that look like? So this is through cancer, schmancer. I can't say schmancer. Schmancer. Schmancer. And then they come to the summit. So it's like a lot about you're saying

the mind body connection. I know you're having cannabis, which, yeah, we always have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary.

I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. I have a granary. expert and really is a radical in the forefront of the revolution and his brilliance and really to the mind body. Is it what kind of things with cannabis? Well, whatever is happening here. Well, we have a very progressive program called Detox your home at Kansas, Shmansa.

The home is the most toxic place we spend the most time in. And ironically, we have the most control over. So we ask you to learn about that. Take the in, on, and around you challenge. What are you putting in your mouth? What are you putting on your skin? All your personal care items and oral hygiene. What are you cleaning? What are you gardening with? You know what what aromas are you using in your house candles and those things that stick in the sockets anything that has a long-lasting scent is probably carcinogenic. those things that stick in the sockets, anything that has a long lasting scent is probably carcinogenic.

Oh, no. We have to start thinking about all that. You're kind of moving. Okay, we go back to what those candles, I love my candles. You got to get her. I like incense. Is my incense okay?

Well, it's nothing, you know, the India. Yeah, the incense is probably okay, but still, I would make sure that what, you know, what you're buying is extremely pristine. You know, you can do everything. Just make sure that you're buying very pristine and nothing that has a scent, you know, that says that it's like just what about a sexy scent that you want in your home? It has to be an organic essential oil. Do you use it to feed you? I do. But it is they are or I do use organic essential oils. But it's great. Oh good. I was afraid I had to throw the whole thing away.

Oh no. I was like another alternative. I have another thing in the trash. I roll if I have it on me. I roll on perfume. That's essential oils. And if I tell you, roll on perfume. That's essential oils. And if I tell you every single person, I wonder if I have it. I love organic. I like the roll on because it's sexy. You put on the nape of your neck wherever else you want everywhere. Everywhere. I don't have it. I don't. That's okay. But you know, that's what you have to do. You have to shift gears and find the replacement. And it takes a little bit of time, but it's so worth it. Because so much of the dis-ease

that we're experiencing today is almost completely because of all the crap that we bring in to our home. I told you, okay, I totally do it that way. Let me just talk to you. I'll be just like, yeah, no, I'm just saying who I'm talking to, people don't know they just tune in, they just got in their car. Fransrashers here, you guys, she's thrown down some serious wisdom here.

A lot of your stuff in your home, not to be the bearer, Brad News, you might have to throw it out, but it will have to be a better sex and better love. We're finishing. You just finish it. You just finish it. But then when it's time to get wasted. Right, so my mom, wait till you finish it and then, okay, you guys can cause anything. I'm here with Fransrashers, she's got a health summit on November 2nd.

Everything on one of these doctors went to medical school, drank the Kool-Aid, started practicing, got woke, and decided this got to be a better way. This is a profit driven business sickness, and you have to realize that. And you know, it's supporting hospitals, it's supporting doctors, it's supporting pharmaceuticals. It's so true. And you know, where the consumer, where are the ones that enable everything from the irresponsible manufacturer, the sociopathic, big business manufacturer, who doesn't really care about anything but making of the bottom line?

Well, like, so I think I was heard you say, so we're here in the business of sick, not the business of getting sexually, not as I say sexual, have any healthy. I can't have the thrown the sex. We are in the business of keeping people sick and not help. If you watch TV, you see all the ads and take this drug and that drug,

but we're not like saying like, here's some organic reasons why you should buy this and that, we buy this cleaner or this soap or it's all, you know, we're out in this area. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things.

And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things.

And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. And we're creating new things. with all of these chemicals. Let's talk about how the chemicals that, specifically, what is a, like people are like,

whoa, I didn't know that. Well, first of all, it's starting with one of those major brand toothpaste that say, do not swallow a cold poison control. Get rid of that toothpaste. That I will say throw away because you cannot, that it's your mouth. It should be made of herbs that grew in your grandma's garden. I mean, it's

you cannot put stuff in your mouth one, two, or three times a day and not expect it to start seeping into the gums as the gateway to a lot of disease. Never get a root canal. That is the only part of the body that's allowed to be dead and remain inside the body within the entire medical community. And it's not good. Never get a root canal. I mean, I know our gums are the secret to our, you know, if you back down to that, just take a flat death tooth and put in, you know, like an implant, an inert implant, because

the tooth has trillions of microscopic holes in it when it's alive. That's part of its filtration system. But when it's dead, it's just leaching crap down your neck into your thyroid, into your breast, into your heart. It's not advisable, or even, you know, you could be getting sinus infections, headaches. It can all be avoided by the foods we're eating. The dentist, like we have a biologic dentist coming. Most biologic dentists said.

Biologic dentists. Yes, and how about that? He wrote the mouth body connection. And you know, most biologic dentists make me want to floss right now. I love to floss. Okay. I'm not going to, you know, advise you to get... Because they were trained the way they were trained.

Because they had to send even prophylactically taking out wisdom teeth when there's nothing wrong with them is a mistake because every tooth connects to a different energy meridian in the body. Your average dentist isn't thinking about that. So we don't have to get the requisite, was it? I would, you know what, whatever your dentist says if he's an old school dentist, I get a second opinion

from a, from a biologic dentist. So who else is going to be there that I want to see? Oh, we have a, well, Sharon Osborne is going to be sharing her compelling story of case and her surviving. Amazing. OK. She's delightful, such a sweet woman.

So she's kind of like our celebrity speaker. OK. Besides you. I love it. I love it. Yeah, besides me, I do the whole show. I mean, I'm either introducing or doing one-on-one interviews or doing a panel discussion.

And if you buy a VIP ticket then, at the end of the, after the last speaker, you go into the exquisite founders room and get to have a one-on-one with the doctors and me. So we, and you get to just hang out. Yes, exactly. So at the end of the day, you'll have questions. There'll be someone in that constellation of doctors that you're going to want to get in front of.

So you hoping is your hope that people leave their feeling at least? Because I feel like I'm going to work. In power. In power. In power. Educate it. And feeling like, OK, I got a game plan.

I know what I can do. Right. Instead of being scared and feeling impotent, what we do is pivot it because there are so many problems with the world. And at the end of the day, change yourself. That's what you have complete control of. So start doing that. Start changing yourself.

Be on the planet, on your body, and use your purchasing power as not only your vote, but your protest. So, okay, so what I'm saying, people who are listening, I think people know now they have to start in myself. We have to make changes. And I've started, I started with the organic the, the, the, the, the deodorant going from regular deodorant to the organic was like a whole thing. Like, if you smell bad, yeah, me too. Good. Yeah. That's a trial.

But I'm saying just the baby steps of starting like the deodorant and then you start with it. But what are you giving steps? Because people can't go home and throw all their stuff right now. But like, no, you don't have to throw it out. But I would never use an into perspiren. Right. Because that has aluminum in it. And people with dementia and all timers have massive amounts of aluminum in their brain. And that generation got it from cooking with aluminum foil, aluminum cans, aluminum, how about when I used to sun tan

aluminum foil? They used to have. Did you get the sun? Did you wear suntan with a little bit of oil? Yeah, I did in, but... No, look at your skin. You did it. I did. I never liked smart. So much now. I just want the sun.

That's what I've been in. It's not so long. I walk around with a parasol. I'm so eccentric. That's so romantic, though, too. It's kind of sexy. People, women will say, man, say, oh, I'm going to start doing that. I have friends who do that.

I bring back the parasol. Yeah, why not? You always have something do with your hand. Yes. It's kind of sexy, like to walk around. And, you know, the one that I'm using now is like white nylon, so it gives that beautiful cast of light. Oh, so it's almost like having a selfie camera

in front of you all the time. Like, I wish this camera here that's filming our, I wish this followed me around all the time. Yeah. So that's what the parasol does. You should make your own now and sell it that way. And like, you're still thinking about your own. You're going to get me from the side. We're getting you there.

And then we have also secret cameras. Oh, I see. Okay. Good. So I think that's getting her from you. I'm not. We're getting it all. It's going to be beautiful.

Because then we've got a whole camera thing going. There's someone downstairs looking at us now. Why don't you even really know? But apparently, we're sitting in the hall at the time. I was like, you're always there, like, even on the breaks, when I'm like, you know, so that's what happened with it. I know they're looking at us. Okay, guys, we're going to take a quick break

and we come back more friend-dresser. So you know I'm so amazed by you and my deep dive into all things, friend-dresser, is that you got diagnosed with cancer in 2000. And then you wrote a book two years later, a book came out. So did you get diagnosed? You're like, okay, change, pivot, gonna change the world and my life changed. I think that's amazing just in itself. You gave birth to this book. Yes, well that's true.

And that's why I put it too, because, you know, I was in a relationship with a guy that was 16 years my junior. And he was the first person that really kind of awakened those maternal feelings in me. I wanted to have his baby first time. But then I got diagnosed. And the radical hysterectomy was my cure.

So that kind of ended that. And we kind of lasted maybe two years after. He was amazing and very helpful and, you know, really an angel. But I never had that kid and could never after that thing in the natural way. So, but I did get birth to a book. And, you know, I remember thinking that I didn't want what happened to me to happen to other people by means of misdiagnosis and mistreatment. And it wasn't really until, and I had a write four drafts of that book long hand with a mom-blung pen. And because I wasn't computer-savvy then to write my whole book. And I'd like putting pen to paper.

And I really, I mean, it took me four drafts to find the funny bone because in the beginning I was very angry and bitter. And I thought I felt kind of screwed over from the medical community and by my own body quite frankly. And I had always likened myself to be everyone's else's caregiver and the superwoman and the stalker, and then I was so leveled to the ground. I mean, I was so weakened to press after that surgery and they kind of decided to take out my appendix

without even talking to me about it. And they kind of said, well out my appendix without even talking to me about it. And they kind of said, well, you don't need it anyway. And you're only at risk of getting infected once we open your abdomen. And, you know, fast forward 19 years later, it turns out in the community that I, you know, work that the appendix is really the brains of the lymphatic system. So basically my lymphatic system got a lobotomy and I have chronic inflammation as a result of it. So at the time, if you had known this with the cancer diagnosis, you had the radical

hysterectomy you said, that's not, would you, so what would you've done instead, you would have kept it obviously. I would have kept my appendix Right appendix right, you know, I probably would have had I Mean I don't know I probably would have had the his direct to me, right, but I wouldn't have had the appendix removed 40 lymph nodes to Well, that's a lot that also compromises the lymphatic system. And I turns out I was in stage one, but the surgeon, the oncologist, was worried because

when she did her own endometrial biopsy, she was picking up on cells that were grade four and four is the most mature. So she didn't know, she figured you've had this for at least two years. And I don't know how advanced it is. So we're just going to take everything out. So that's what happened. We're going to take out, yeah, the 40 lymph nodes. We're going to do a full cavity wash and hope for the best. Okay. Then when the whole the pathology report came out, they said that I was in stage one grade two. So the majority of the cells were grade two. And the tumor was stage one,

which means it hadn't even penetrated the wall of the endometrial lining. It was just sitting there kind of getting bigger. So this was, so I said the history because a lot of people, I was thinking about the radicalness of just having that, but then your appendix. So that's the part, the lymph nodes, you wouldn't, you wouldn't have done because now you realize, but let's talk a little bit about your history before that, because I know you've been through a lot. We're going

to move into some experiences, sex, trauma. Yes, well, you know, I married my high school sweetheart, Peter, and we met when we were 15. And we fell in love, you know, and had a lot in common in a really soulmates. And we're still the best of friends and very much a family. But you know, he realized that his true orientation was being gay. And we needless to say, we split after that.

But prior to that, I had become a victim of a violent crime. Man that was on parole and his brother burst into my house, knocked down the front door and raped me and my girlfriend. And how old were you then? I was, I think, 27. Okay.

In New York. Yeah, I think I was, like, 27 years. Okay. And they like that. I was afraid to feel my pain. That's right. And that was a thing that I kind of had, it's post-traumatic stress later when I was early

in doing the nanny. One of the tabloid television entertainment shows did a whole piece on that I had been raped. And they even went to the jail to try and talk to the rapist and For me and people were calling my parents like it had just happened. It sounded like it had just happened and And that at that point I was actually already in therapy because I was having Issues with my marriage You know for obvious reasons, but we didn't know that that was the reason

at the time. He was just so controlling. And later we found out that it was because he was trying to control himself. So he was controlling. Yeah, because he was gay. But he loved me. And he wanted to be with me. And he didn't, you know, really want to lose everything he had. So back up, one thing about the rape then why do I have to go on to your gay date? But you know, I know that you're a sex doctor and you know, after like the first two or three weeks, I mean, we had sex for the first time, Peter and I. And it was suggested that we kind of dive in the deep end and go for it. Okay.

After you after the after the the, after the rate. Okay, with your husband, they said, just go ahead and have sex again. And then we'll try it. Yeah, try it. Don't have like, be brave, or, okay. You know, yeah, so we, um, it was really an amazing thing. And I'll never forget it because I think that Peter saw in my face with my eyes closed, that I was kind of grimacing and maybe back.

Yes, of course. At that night of the attack, and he said, open your eyes, it's me, it's just me. I love you. And you know, and even now I kind of can get a little choked up thinking about it, because it was just so sweet and loving. And I did open up my eyes and I could see them right now

over me being so gentle and loving. And not all men are like that. And not all husbands are like that. They kind of can make it about them and start sulking and reject. Ever since this thing happened, you never want to assess this. Exactly.

Since you've had pain or you've had this, or they reject you. Because they feel like somehow you're soiled or whatever and they don't want to be with you because this man has weight with you or something. You hear terrible stories. Oh, you do. And as I said, when we're off the air, women often have me sign their books from interwining

where I write about it. Bad things happen to good people and I talk about it in the second book too. But the thing is, so we know one in three women are raped in this country, and typically, you know, women who have been raped or had any kind of sexual assault when they call into the show or men, I often say that it's not going to go away just because if the more you repress it, you know, whatever you resist, persist, and what I recommend a lot, these days I found that EMDR therapy, trauma therapy can help for a lot of people, not just talking it, but you kind of have to get into your body and release a lot of the,

you know, we store emotions in our body and stuff. So what, what did you do? What kind of like, because I know you also said, I know it's a lot going through this. You said that you learned, you weren't vulnerable. And I get that I've brought up in career woman Not vulnerable keeping our emotions. I trauma I kind of I thought I'm okay You know, I didn't get like I thought I didn't really get hurt right me. I didn't get be I could have been worse We say like oh I could have right and you know, he didn't beat me up or anything. It wasn't a

Violent it was a violation for sure and you know, he didn't beat me up or anything. It wasn't a violent. It was a violation for sure. And it was violent, but it wasn't like it could have been worse. I could have been brutally battered and wasn't at all. So, you know, I thought, okay, I'm just gonna get on with my life. But not really dealing with how it truly impacted me emotionally, had its repercussions.

And I really think that that contributed to why I got a gynecologic cancer because, you know, you hold the pain and it's almost poetic that that's where the cancer law itself in my uterus. So you know, you got to really feel your feelings, even just today. A girlfriend of mine wrote me and said, her mom passed away. And I felt so bad. but the thing that I tell people always is feel your feelings. Feel them now, don't repress.

Yeah, honor the relationship, grieve, grieve. We don't know how to, this is why I'm saying it's like, I, in my own experience, like my dad died suddenly when I was 19 and he was 49. Wow. And I didn't, I know. And I didn't, I knew that I went back up to school, got three jobs, took a bunch of classes, been driven, right? But that I didn't, you know, and I didn't, I knew that I went back up to school, got three jobs, took a bunch of classes, been driven, right?

But that I didn't, you know, when I knew I'm like, I haven't really dealt with it, but I didn't know what that looks like to deal with grieving. You know what? There's no like manual, this is how you grieve. So I always just tell people like, when my friends cry or anyone cries, I'm like, good, feel it, keep crying. It's good when my producer Jamie started crying earlier this year. I said, feel, feel, because she hadn't felt she kept things down So it's like I think it's so right. You're so women Yeah, it's good. It's good my manager of 38 years. It was like a surrogate mom to me Went out to lunch one day and dropped it. I never saw her alive again and she was the first person that I

Really truly loved that died. So, I was lucky that, you know, it was only four years ago. Right. Do you know how to feel by that? You would learn how to feel by that? I did. Well, I honored that profound loss with grieving and not being embarrassed that I started, would start to cry in front of people.

It's not funny that we get so embarrassed to show it. And that's why we do a lot of great models about how to show emotions. I hope it's in front of people. It's not funny that we get so embarrassed to show it. And that's why we don't have a lot of great models about how to show emotions. I hope it's getting better for people, but definitely taking care of your health, your wellness. Yeah, I know. So, if honor the relationship, you can cry. And if anybody's uncomfortable, you know, the adios.

Okay, fan, we just have a few minutes. I have to, before we go, I have a few things. Okay. I have to ask you the five questions that we ask all of our guests, and they have to do a sex because we haven't gotten much in the sex, but I gotta do it, Fran, just rape. But I think rape going for rape sex.

I know, Fran, so let's, you know, little bit sex. Okay, biggest turn on. Okay. No, I have to admit something here. I actually have dreams about Brad Pitt. Oh, okay. No, I have to admit something here. I actually have dreams about Brad Pitt. Oh, okay. And he's the only you're loving too. I love him.

He's so hot. He's the only star that shows up in my dreams. Yes. And in the last one, he was in some kind of trouble and I agreed for the sake of publicity I would marry. Okay. Fine. Just once. trouble and I agreed for the sake of publicity I would marry. Okay, fine. Just I guess he turns me on. I don't have these jokes.

I've imagined it. I'd be so too. But I like a nice kiss is, you know, like really delicious pillowie kiss. Yes. Biggest turn off is oh, the biggest turn off. Oh, I thought you were saying that's your biggest turn off. Don't you dare kiss me. No I love kissing. No I'm soft.

You know the biggest turn off is probably bad breath. Yeah. Hygiene's a big one for people. What makes good sex for people? Many people Hygiene's like a big category, category, my Michigan, category of a... I think what makes what? I don't know what makes good, I just want to count, yeah, what makes good sex? I think that both people really being in the moment and very present and really connecting and being extremely tactile and having it just be slow enough that you're making a connection.

Okay. Your number one relationship tip or sex tip. You know, get like really comfortable with being naked. Enjoy being naked. Yeah. Learn to love your body. Yeah. Totally sell it. Sell it your body. Yeah, totally sell it. Sell it at whatever it is, just sell it.

Okay, this just in from the other room though. Your director said, what's your type of sexy man? What's my type of sexy man? You know, I think ultimately it's probably in real life, I think that. Brad Pitt? Yeah, but I don't usually date blondes, even though Peter's kind of on the lights side. I had the best sex with an Argentinian.

Oh, I love that lover. Okay, Fran Drescher, thank you for being here. We gotta go. Check out our fifth annual Master Class November to Health Summit on November 2nd, cancer schmanceur.org. It's all on our website, sexwithamily.com. All right, guys, thanks for listening to this show. Thank you for operating at Five Stars, wherever you listen.

I love when you do that. That really helps us so we can continue to do more shows. We know we really show three shows a week now. And thank you to my amazing listeners and my great team. Love you, Ken Kristen, Alisa, Michelle, producer, Jamie, and Michael. Was it good for you? Email me.

Feedback at sexwithemily.com. was good for you, email me, feedback at sexwithemily.com.