Sex With Emily - Let Your Body Talk with Aaron Alexander

Episode Date: October 5, 2019

On today’s show, Dr. Emily is joined by movement coach & host of the Align Podcast, Aaron Alexander & they talk about how our daily physical work plays a role in how we get in touch with our bodies in & outside the bedroom.They discuss how the physical alignment of a body can shape a person’s mood, ways that vulnerability can be seen as a strength rather than a weakness, & how masturbating can lead to making better life decisions — or in other words, “post-nut clarity.”Follow Emily on all social: @sexwithemilyFor even more sex talk, tips, & tricks visit sexwithemily.comFor more information on Aaron Alexander, click HERE.   Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Most people are in this fight or flight. I would say the majority, I mean, do meet maybe just people I hang out with, but like we've had trauma where we're stressed, we're running around, and a lot of us live, we don't learn to ever breathe correctly. Yeah, we're attuning to each other too. You know, so yeah, like you would any one person wherever their state is at, the typical tendency is for them to find other people that are in that similar place. Because we only want to be around people that are similar to us typically. Typically. Yeah. Or finding like a polar like someone that's on the opposite side of the pole to kind of

even you out as a thing as well. But when we're hanging out together, we're going to start to take on similar facial affect. We'll take on similar postures. We'll take on similar breath. Because in order for us to be able to connect, we create that rapport. We need to kind of see the common ground. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily and today's show I'm joined by Movement Coach and host of the Align Podcasts Aaron Alexander to talk about

how our daily physical work plays a role and how we get in touch with our bodies. In and outside the bedroom, topics include, Did you know that your structural alignment actually ties into how you're feeling about yourself every day? Would it mean to be emotionally vulnerable and why it's a strength, not a weakness? How masturbating can actually help you make the right decisions in life? Hey, it's called post nut clarity. And the more time you spend with your partner, the more likely you are to adopt aspects of their personality.

Did you know that? All this and more, thanks for listening. Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Betrumaise they call them a lie on me. Hey, Aveline, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got a hair stand. Oh my. The women know about shrinkage.

Isn't it common moment? What do you mean, like laundry? It shrinks. Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm off here. I'm so drunk. Being bad feels pretty good.

You know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information check out sexwithemle.com. I love our site. Also, you guys, find me on serious XM stars. Channel 109, I'm there Monday through Friday, 5 to 7 PM Pacific, and I love it. You guys should totally call in and you can get a free trial at sexwithemily.com slash

sxm. And you can always call us, triple 8, 9478277. Find me on social media. It's at sex with Emily across the board. Also you guys, special announcement. If you haven't heard, I have a new vibrator necklace. Now when I say that I know you're picturing like a big, I don't heard, I have a new vibrator necklace. Now when I say that I know you're picturing like a big, I don't know, dildor around my neck, but it is a beautiful

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your sex life. Feedback at sexwithemily.com. Alright guys enjoy the show. Erin this has been quite a morning already. You just like showed up 20 minutes ago and I've had my whole everything is shifted now. I'm grounded in my seat looking at you across the table. You grounded me into my body like the last time I saw you. I've even met each other twice now Like the last time I saw you, I we've met each other twice now. And the first time I was in your podcast, a line podcast,

and now you're here for the Sex with Emily podcast. And I actually was kind of hoping when you came in, we would do that. How would you explain what we just did? Well, it's called a choreography yoga. And we just did. Yeah, people probably from there with that. And essentially. The hours were special. Of course, was special. Especially the snuggle at the end. I just wanted to snuggle.

I love snuggling. I think that so partner acrobatics or acro yoga or any form of like excuse to touch, I think is one of the most valuable things that we can do in Western culture because we essentially have like two gears of contact. There's like, you know, maybe three, there's no contact at all, and then there's physical violence contact, and then there's like full-on penetration sex. Yeah, exactly. But then within that, there's this whole spectrum of contact that I think that it's really

important that we learn. It is important, especially with touch. I think we crave touch. We need touch. I think there is this epidemic of loneliness and we're not getting out. We're not even hugging that thing when I came in. You're like, that was a big hug. I'm like, have you ever failed you to thrive before? Have you heard that?

Yes. Yes. There's been all sorts of instances of that. Essentially, when a child doesn't have enough contact, they get this signal that their mother or their caretakers isn't around to take care of them, and their metabolism slows down, and their growth just kind of comes to a halt.

They start developing all sorts of emotional disorders, and the potential theoretical reason for that is that they get this signal that there's no one there to hold them to take care of them So it's safer for them to go into the kind of this like hibernation winter mode and so their body kind of Goes into this hole and so you see that in What was it the Armenian orphanages? What was the hungry? No?

What was the orphanages that they did that? It was the, you remember this? As you remember this? As late 80s. Anyways. I remember the same study with the bunnies too. They did. There was like a professor at Stanford who did a study with bunnies and there was like remaining orphanages.

I think the remaining orphanages. The kids, because they, okay, got it. No, it's important. I don't need you. Couldn't have let it go. But yeah, that's true. We all crave, like, touch and we don't even think we need it or maybe we didn't have enough when we were little. So we think we don't even think we need it or maybe we didn't have enough We're little so we think we don't need it

But I think what does it say also you should have like how many hugs a day or a lot a lot Yeah, it even stimulates I'll get into like other things and aren't just like studies and stuff like that but It stimulates neurogenesis in in mice specifically there was like an interesting study where they were a tickling rat pups. And so they would take them through this like this tickle protocol. And what they found is that it actually stimulated their brains to grow. And so literally this touch, this contact, like we think of nutrition as being the only

thing that's like the, you know, the raw materials for us to grow. But there's so many other materials. I think touch is one of the foundational ones. It is. It is. So is that so tell me about your journey. So you are you have started moving called the line movement. Yeah, a line method. Yeah, not looking at my notes. Well, what a line method. A line podcast, Aaron Alexander is who's here with me today. So pick so back up from it because you we get into what you're doing now, but how did you you even got started as a bodybuilder, right? And I- Insecurity.

Insecurity. That started with insecurity. You started with insecurity? It being an insecure man, which we know there are many insecure men as there are women. So how old were you when you were like this, you were kind of struggling at your- So I became really obsessed with packing on muscle.

I was sent to them when I was like 14, so I came from like a really awkward, I had like this sweet bowl cut that my mom did and was all uneven. I had like big buck teeth and just all the things were off. And I was like, we're going up like a stropensylvania, a homage country. Okay. So everything was essentially like about as awkward as it possibly could have been. We've almost no. Okay. Yeah, that would have been more. That would have been extra interesting of how's homage to.

But with the haircut though, it would seem. You would see. You would think. You would think. So you were like, something that I just don't feel. Well, so then, I mean, so my dad started getting into crack. I thought you were going to say like, crack go geneticist, but like crack. You crack, into crack. I thought you were going to say like, crack-o-genesis, but like, crack.

You crack, that's like crack. Yeah, and I started pimpin' women and all sorts of weird stuff started happening at home. Before that, he was like a falconer, like we would hunt bunnies with hawks together and shit like that is very interesting. He was the president of the Nature Conservancy and he was a stockbroker and he like led all this. Wow. Yeah, it very interesting. He was the president of the Nature Conservancy, and he was a stockbroker, and he led all this.

Wow. Yeah, it was interesting. And then all of a sudden, then he started to crack. Then he started smoking crack. Wow. Within that. And your parents are they still married? Yeah.

Until he went to prison. And so that happened when I was around like 16. Before that, I think subconsciously I was starting to kind of sense some, you know, because kids are really sensitive. Yeah, we know what's going on. All the parents who are like, we can't, we just say together for our kids. No, they know you're miserable. Yeah, like, like, seek, I think, create joy in the house. Teach your child how to, how to boldly find joy in their life. I think that's like a really

important thing. Like if you're living in that way, like that exudes through the whole place. I think that's the most important thing. But within that, I'm nothing but grateful for all that. And now my dad's like, he's like, loves Jesus now and he's like, selling insurance, he's don't great stuff, and he's buying a house in Florida, and he's like, we have a great relationship,

and it's like, it's very cool. But in that, I think I was sensitive to the kind of like, lack of safety in the house, and that translated into becoming obsessed with packing on biological safety in the form of slabs of muscle. So I just became totally obsessed with all the front muscles, so like biceps and pecs and abs and all of that, like everything that it flexed in front of the mirror. And then my body essentially started exploding in in the sense of like joints dislocating and like chronic pain and anxiety.

And as a teenager. And as a teenager. Mm-hmm. Because you were doing it how you felt, but you were obviously following certain protocols, your position. So just following superficial, all the superficial indicators, anything that I could do for superficial validation, I was going hard into that. Okay.

As far as having like any teachers to help go in and tidy up the internal bits. Yeah, I know it was like pumping iron and the movie pumping out with our, and we were drinking bottles of robotus and shit, just wanting to get high. And it was a weird, it was a weird, didn't you hear your confidence, at least superficial?

Robotusson? No. Maybe. I don't know. Hey, I'm open. Whatever works. I'm not building it. For sure.

It's temporarily. But then you put too much of yourself, you know, you hang your hat on that part. Right. As long as you hang your hat on that part, essentially, it's like, you know, the, an analogy could be like, you're building your house on the side of a volcano. You're like, oh, it's totally dormant. Like it's all good. It's like, okay, like I've been in this too much into that house. Because any point you could be taking away. So then you started feeling so you got built though and you started getting,

did you start getting more attention from women? For example, was that where you were feeling insecure? Were you just feeling overall like you're at your ass kick because you were a small kid? I think my heart was too closed off in order to actually allow any meaningful relationships in. I'm still like working on that. I think it's still something that's like the highest order for me. Right, right, and I'm there too. So heart clenched.

Clenched. Clenched. Clenching. Everywhere clenching. That were these clenched. My anus was clenching. Yeah, exactly. How did you know?

I mean, it's better. I'm learning. Okay, good. But so that it's better. I'm learning. Okay. Good. But so that I found your tool that you offered to be helpful. What tool did I offer? Oh, the prostate though. Was that a prostate wasn't a prostate? Oh, what was it? I thought it was a smoothie stirring stuff. It goes in the vagina. It goes internally and then that little thing sucks on your clothes. I thought that was for my anus. Maybe you could go in the afternoon. Well, it's too late now. I'm like, just wait, though, we've got some choice. Don't you have an anus thing? Do we've got be guys? Do you know what beef is for me? No, I will give you

some butt. We love the be vibe. When you leave here, you're going to go shopping in our sex. Can I take you there? I'll go again. What I get, did I say what I used up? You're saying I gave you you last time, Can I take you there? I'll go again. I'll go again. Did I say what you're saying? I gave you last time, or just now, you're talking about that. You gave me some type of apparatus for an orphan. Oh, oh, oh, I gave you the nearest. I thought you meant the thing we saw out there. No, that was the last time you were here.

The clip suction cup. That was a clip whisperer. I gave you an eneros toy for your prostate. Oh, see? That was right. I know. You were right, but you didn't use it. Well, you know, okay, got it.

But you didn't use it. Can we talk about opening the heart that? Yeah. So no, seriously, I was right. I know, you were right, but you didn't use it. Well, you know, okay, got it, but you didn't use it. Can we talk about opening the heart then? Yeah. So no, seriously, because I feel like in ways I was very similar to you where I took to working out when I was about, I didn't start to later though. I was, I think I was like a freshman in college. And I kind of sent high school years just sort of,

you know, had a very like emotionally neglectful childhood for sure. And then I did find exercise like I started just running. Like I was just running marathons and exercising. And it felt, I felt so good. I got that in Dwarf and Rush for the first time because I was not naturally athletic as a kid. I was like, got no to get out of gym class. I always was smallest.

Like the last one picked. Like I didn't, no one played sports in my family. I just didn't feel confident in that way. And then I started to work out and I felt like I was moving my body and I was in my body, but I realized a lot of that was just to get the like endorphins and then to like look at, you know, a lot of it was maybe superficial in a way, but mostly what I've realized now is it's been more for the dopamine for my mind and all that stuff. But through all my movement I've been doing, and you think like the heart is all a part of it because a lot of your work has to do with breath, right?

Breathing through and I think a lot of us, you might not, like listeners are thinking, oh, I feel my heart's open, but I think a lot of us, as a reaction to things that happen in our life, either it's big traumas, little traumas, you just kind of slowly shut down and you'd be like a wall around it, right? You can check into your breath at any time

and see a one-to-one relationship with the state of your nervous system, whether you're actually in a calm, restful digestive healing state, or whether you're kind of stuck in more of like a fight flight panicky type place. How do we do that? Something we can do right now.

So you can bring your hands to the sides of your ribs. Oftentimes we learn like in yoga world and we want to like breathe into the belly. And we just kind of like extend our belly out. And we think they were diaphragmatically breathing. That doesn't mean you're actually utilizing diaphragm yet. So an even more effective test would be just bring your hands aside your ribs. And then breathe and feel that the heart is on tality feel the breath going out to the sides. Yeah, it's one one or so. So out of the side and then you can emphasize the breath out. So you can do like four seconds.

So your nose are. No, it's no, no, no, yeah. So you can go four seconds in and then try holding for four seconds and then try six seconds out. And then hold for four seconds and then try six seconds out. And then hold for four seconds while you do this once. And then mech in. And then you can go through a repetition of that.

And so some people oftentimes, they're kind of stuck. Like, think about when you get surprised. You go, there, you take a big breath of your mouth and you go, and your, your clavicles, the bones up around your neck could go up and it's all this upper, you know, vertical type breath. When you are calm, you're able to really emphasize that breath all the way out, out, out, out, out,

out, out, out, out, out, and you can get that last little bit of exhale out of your body. At the same time, what you can do is you can kind of like speak into your nervous system, your emotional state by starting to activate more of that physical sign, thinking more like kind of like bottom up, you know, my body affects my mind. And so you can start to leverage those same practices and emphasize that breath out to really bring yourself into more of that parasympathetic like restful by just the state. Well, that's the thing we're talking about.

So what we're saying is like most people are in this fight or flight. I would say the majority, I mean, do me, maybe just people I hang out with, but like we've had trauma where we're stressed, we're running around and a lot of us live, we don't learn to ever breathe correctly. Yeah, we're attuning to each other too. You know, so yeah, like you would any one person wherever their state is at, the typical tendency is for them to find other people that are in that similar place. Because we only want to be around people that are similar to us, typically.

Typically. Yeah. Or finding like a polar, like someone that's on the opposite side of the pole to kind of even you out as a thing as well. But when we're hanging out together, we're going to start to take on similar facial affect, we'll take on similar postures, we'll take on similar breath. Because in order for us to be able to connect, we can create that rapport,

we need to kind of see the common ground. Right, but it's not even conscious, it's kind of like tantric sex. Totally unconscious. If they give you the tantric practices, if you're just looking to other's eyes, then eventually your breath will start to sink up. Yeah, yeah, but unicity feeling.

Exactly, so, but what I'm saying is, okay, I don't mean everyone, but many of us do not ever learn to properly breathe. Maybe sometimes we do and we're calm, but a lot of us just live with the vertical breath. That's sort of like, I always think we haven't, or it's sort of like, we haven't done like the 12 inch journey from our head to our heart,

and we also haven't, like, we're just sort of living above our heart. So this breath is so, I feel like breath is the new Omar works into meditation. I wouldn't use meditation, but now I feel like we really, I think it would do us so much better practice if we just learned how to, to even that deeper diaphragm breathing or in yoga.

Like I almost got confused with which breath do I do? I've learned so many different types. Does it matter? Or should we all just do think, do you recommend that everybody practice this? So starting off with basic tools to get you closer into a place of like balance or integration and that eventually you have to let go of all the tools.

So it's like you use the raft to get across the river and then once you finally get across the river, now it's like okay you have to drop the raft and keep one walking. So those tools can like the breathing technique we just did that can help you get to a point of like okay I'm not in just this total panic state. So I'm back into somewhat more of like a place of homeostasis. And then eventually, okay, how do I find, you know, you could call it like your original breath. You know, so an interesting thing,

it'll be look at a picture of yourself as a kid or look at a video of yourself as your kid as a kid. And see, wow, how did I move? How did I breathe? Like what was my kind of my perspective of the world at that point? And then as an adult, now perhaps I have this blood pressure issue or I hang on to fat or I'm chronically stressed out. That's just all baggage that you've packed on over the last 20 years that you totally

have access to dropping. Okay, so let's talk about that. So this goes back to your practice and you're that you've developed the line methods that way you do. I mean, do you feel like you go to people and you look because we have so much, I think a lot of us have a lot of pain and I do believe that we hold a lot of it as emotions and stress. We hold in our body and we're constantly just repeating patterns and from our habits, right, that aren't necessarily healthy. And so I mean, I want to understand more. I know you have a book coming out soon, right?

Descendants. A line method. So, please sound down. Actually, yeah. Oh, okay. It's called the line method. Five movement principles for a stronger body, sharp or mind, and stress-proof life. So can you just talk about, I mean, I feel like that's kind of a good lead into what you

actually do, what you've developed in these years. What is it, okay, I know you've been trained in golfing and a lot of different modalities, but talk about the Aaron Alexander method here. Really? Because I think that this is very, I, every, you know, we live in LA,

there's a lot of people doing things like this, but I think a lot of my listeners are all over the world for sure, and I do believe that this is cutting edge and innovative because I think that for disease in the body that a lot of it is because we have we haven't breathed properly. Obviously we don't eat, we don't move a lot of times, but if we can get rid of the stuff that we're storing, emotions, the tightness, the clenching. Well, so an interesting example is your posture starts, it spills into kind of same thing like the bottom-up thing.

Your posture spills into the way that you think, it spills into the way that you feel. And so there was a study at university in San Francisco where they took college students and they had them hunch over into this position, which is like the typical position that you're in every time you're staring at your cell phone or driving your car or plane seat in front of your desk, you're in that hunched over position. When people are in that position, it's more easy for them to access kind of more like challenging depressive type memories. Then when they put, there's a cool now like shake it off and put you in an upright position where you feel strong and stacked like you

just want a prize. You know, from that position, all of a sudden, it's a lot easier for you to access these like feel good memories. So there's not one that's any better or worse because it's good to be able to go into that deep introspective, like don't be scared of the dark. Like go all the way into the dark. And then I think that if we do allow ourselves to go all the way into that, we can kind of naturally come out, whereas a lot of people we get like this self-help stuff,

and you know, you need to move to the world, like you have this like stick up your ass all the time in order to feel good. Like that's not it either. Well, so then what is it, if I come into you to see you, if I get to the point where I'm coming to see you? Like let's walk through the first thing you do,

is you check posture, you check how they walk, you check their alignment. Yeah, kind of sort of, I mean the first thing I do too, because I flip people upside down. Like what we just did. See you do that with everyone. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah, done it with like large human beings of all sorts.

And it's easy to do, you're just stacking your own stuff. Yeah, no, it's not that big of a deal I promise it is But yeah, so from there, that's a really great way of just for people to start tapping into the breath You know, so the very first thing like every meaningful movement practice yoga, chie-gong martial art dance You know for thousands of years the very first thing is what you're doing right now. It's just feeling that breath. You know, and so forever in my life, and only really until recent, I would just, I could go to classes or Pilates or whatever and just be like, shut up about this breath stuff. You know, like, do a backflip, do something cool. I'm like, I don't want to hear about breath. You know, and recent, all of a sudden,

it's becoming much more evident, especially upon like, you know, writing the book and like going even deeper into the whole breath thing, one of the chapters all about breath. I realize like, okay, there's a reason that every single individual that had something meaningful to say throughout history from a movement, mind, body perspective was coming back to breath. So that's the first thing to know. Where are they? Interesting.

Like you were back in the beginning, okay. Yeah, look into the Bible, look into the Bhagavad-gita, look into the aponashad, look into karate, look into anything, weightlifting, Olympic lifting, like all the things, you need to figure out compression in your midsection, that's how you get power. For more of like a bodywork, relaxation, elongation place, you need to figure out how to get that long out breath in.

Oh, and start to utilize your voice as well. So many people are bound up in and around their throat. You know, and they kind of always have that sensation of like they're biting their tongue. They don't really speak their mind. Again, that sounds like some new age woo-woo crazy fish. Yeah, it's true. But it's real talk when you actually see clients regularly. And there's people that have stuff they've been meaning to say to their husband or their wife,

or you know, they want to oh they want to like come out and be seen, but they kind of just Titus around their throat and oftentimes what you'll see is people start to unwind some of those places Physically all of a sudden they'll start expressing themselves in their relationships differently as well after they're doing this work after they're doing this work Or maybe even they could start you you know, take a, go join a chorus group. Start singing or something. Start singing, yeah. Okay. You know, and from there, I'll be saying,

well, I'm singing, and now I have this softness around my neck and my shoulders are kind of dropping down. I don't have this chronic tension in around my chest. And I was like, oh, well, a lot happened there. It wasn't just that you were physically singing. That's huge. Tone's the fake, it's nerve, and does all sorts of It wasn't just that you were physically singing. That's huge.

Tone's the fake, it's nerve, and does all sorts of great stuff. Releases oxytocin through your body. It makes you feel good and safe and loved. But also just standing up and being seen and being vulnerable. I think it's one of the most important things that any fucking person can do. That's true.

No, it's so true. It's so, even, yeah, the public speaking is the number two biggest fear I think next to death, right? Like I talk to you all the time, like, how do you do that? How do you talk? How do you get in front of you? And I think it's because we're all so afraid of expressing ourselves and we walk around with this tightness in our chest.

And we're scared to be judged. So we typically wind up wearing some mask because that mask, we can throw it away if someone hates your mask. You're like, well, it wasn't me anyway. And so then you can live your life for 30, 40, 50 years until eventually, I can't live my life with a mask anymore. Do you feel like there's one guy that's like, we're always shedding masks, though?

Is that why? Yeah, I think that's the process of being here on Earth. Yeah, you're peeling back the layers. When I first started on my journey, I was like, oh, you peel back the layers of the onion. I was like, okay, but eventually you got to end that onion and it never ends. There's a lot of layers. Why do you think we're here on earth?

Oh my God, that's, I'll tell you why. Okay. I'll tell you why, I mean why humans are here. It was a point of all, it's a point of all. It's a point of all, it's a point of all. I think to make sense of all the suffering and all the stuff that a lot of us go through, I mean, if you go back to the beginning of time,

the Buddha was the first thing you said, like it's the universal law of suffering. And in that, what he meant by that is that it's our minds are gonna cause us the most suffering. It's not even the external things, a lot of times there are external, but how are we going to deal with that, that our voice in our head,

and how we gonna turn that into presence and mindfulness? Yeah. So anyway, once you take a look at those things, I think that we are here too. I actually believe in some ways perhaps we choose our life before pre, there's a lot of different, I chose my parents because there was a less I need to learn.

I chose his family. And I think that just to answer, however you believe we got here, whatever situation you're in, I believe that we are here to work through issues from our childhood and everybody has them. You didn't have a perfect family, there's no such thing as a perfect family. I believe that our parents loved us.

I believe that they did the best that they could. But you can't help but just look at, I mean, take your parents who they are as humans. I know you, people are like, but I love my parents, but I'm like, I get it. I love my parents too. But like you were talking about your dad. You said, you talked about your dad

and you said, well, I'm grateful for that. Totally. Because that's where you chose to learn from that. You could have been often be doing crack yourself. And you- And I learned from that as well. It would be perfect. Which is annoying and new age we should say again,

but nonetheless. It would have made sense. A lot of drug addicts are the smartest, most sensitive people walking around the globe. Yeah. They're just sensitive to how kind of funny the system that we live in, that we presently live in are.

And they're like, I can't take it. Well, yeah, exactly. We're all trying to numb with something. But no, don't you think we're here to work through whatever happened in our patch of re, because you're even saying that we're rewiring stuff that we're clenching, that we're holding on to. We weren't touched as a child or we weren't, we weren't encouraged to express ourselves or we lived in fear or anxiety or something happened.

Like, it doesn't have to be every day of your childhood, but things happen and then we just keep building these habits and patterns and the way we move and the way we are that don't really service anymore. So then we have to get to a point where we start to, on the path, I suppose, and start to build ourselves again. Why do you think we're here? I don't know.

I like to believe what you're saying because it makes me feel like I have purpose, especially it's like a masculine quality. It's like, okay, there's the goal. That is the purpose. We're marching up the mountain. But then I was reading last night about the sun will likely consume earth in like seven and a half billion years.

And which that's a long time. Yeah. We probably won't live to that level. Probably not. Probably not. But nonetheless, like I wonder as far as like we're building up the human species in this and that, and it's like, well, at some point all this stuff is going to be consumed by the sun anyway.

Okay. Well, what about it? Right. Like, who would have... Well, I don't know. It doesn't mean you feel bad. It's kind of nihilistic, but nonetheless, it's like, I like, I think we need to create stories to live by that, like that's need to create stories to live by that view.

Like that's, we're going to live by our stories. And so you can shape somebody's life and the outcome based off of the story that you teach them. Right. The story that I teach them. The story that you teach them. And that you teach yourself. Yeah.

Well, I think a lot of times our narrative too, this is the other thing about being, you know, going through the process, like doing your work. However, that work looks to you, I think is rewriting your narrative because if mine could have been, or yours could have been like, I grew up with parents that weren't available, or my dad wasn't there and did, and like, now power me, but you're like, flipped it and like, what could I learn from that? Yeah, it's like a, it's a major superpower to be able to control your narrative. It's a major superpower to be able to control your narrative. So most of us, what is it?

Over 50% of Americans can't afford a surprise unexpected $400 bill. It's crazy. A cell, an iPhone costs like $1,200. So over a half Americans can't afford that. 95% of diseases are considered to be stress related. I believe that. Certainly. Yeah.

It's probably more than that. You know, but so I believe that most things are because we haven't learned to live our lives, to process our emotions. Yeah, so if you're living in a model, you know, so let's just say 50% of people, $400 bill, that's like the carburetor gets funny in your car or whatever. All of a sudden, you can't feed your kids that month or you can't pay rent that month

or whatever it is. That's going to wigg you out. Yeah. You know, instead of be able to get out of that model of living and go into a next one where you can start to begin the beginning stage as if really like creating a reality, it's a huge, huge deal. It is. So to be a person that you can actually like weave your tail

and tell your story, like write your own autobiography, you know, make it as interesting as you possible want, like it's crazy. But how did you so then give it to you? That is crazy. Is that, is that, yeah, you're right. I can say people don't even, yeah, but if you're, but here's the problem.

And I've been in, I've gotten those bills when I couldn't pay them and financial stress is a huge, it, when you're stressed about money and I would say that this even impacts men, I think in a different way than women, but it's like you feel, it can feel a masculated. If your work's not going well, like jobs aren't going well, and then as a result, it's really hard to kind of say, well, I'm going to rewrite my narrative and keep it positive.

But I know when I was going through financial stress, it was like, yeah, it's really hard to kind of say, well, I'm going to rewrite my narrative and keep it positive. But I know when I was going through financial stress, it was like, yeah, it's like debilitating, but I had to keep it. I was like, listening to secret and all that stuff was that. I was like, I had to say. So how did you move out of that? Oh, we interviewed me. How do you move out of, how do you move out of,

how do you move out of, going from financial stress to, what's the steps? Like there's a transition. Because once you get momentum, it's almost like cheating. Yeah. If you have, if you're like Trump and your dad gave you a 500 million bucks or whatever it was, it's like, all right, come on.

And it's still like great. Like you started, you know, halfway to home plate and you ran to home, you know, and it's nothing against anybody like that. It's all a matter of what you did with that. But that transition of actually getting out of like, broke, maybe emotionally as well. I think it might be a little bit of a problem.

How did I get out? I mean, I think I just started to, I never gave up. I believe it was doing this podcast. I like, in 2009, I started in 2005, in 2009 still not making money. Like it was just financially, I wasn't, the messages I was telling myself was I would, wouldn't be good at business. I didn't understand it. It was me too hard that everyone's just messages I was telling myself was I would wouldn't be good at business. I didn't understand it. It was me too hard that everyone's just, I was very naive.

I was like, everyone's, but this show, people love, people, everybody's gonna want to listen because everyone doesn't know anything about sex. And people try to pay me down and be like, who's your audience? Who's your target? I'm like, everybody, it's gonna be men and women of all ages because that no one knows anything about sex. But I think then I realize when you get nothing when you have no money and it's desperate And I'm like selling like everything which I didn't even have that much and like living on a friend's couch

I realized it like I I Believe too much. I took a lot of I took some jobs So I had to be humble and I had to take jobs doing things that I wouldn't want to do normally do and Then to get the stability the funny like I did things that were wouldn't want to do, normally do. And then to get the stability, the funny, like I did things that were way beneath my scale set, but it was just to have the money coming in, so I could kind of have the confidence

be like, I'm not gonna give up on this dream of such that I'm leaving, but in somewhat something about that humble like answering phones, or like, I cleaned house for a weekend with a friend, like, we did everything. And I thought, I think that that actually made me realize it like I didn't die. I could do it. I could be humble and then still work on my dream on the side and then also realizing that um that taking baby steps into business like like just going I don't know like saying like I can do business like my messages were like

but Excel spreadsheets make me anxious you know just kind of starting talking to sponsors people I don't know I just figured it starting talking to sponsors. People, I don't know, I just figured it out. I think I got confidence because I wasn't gonna give up. I knew I was gonna give up so I had to face my fear. And that fear was talking business with people. And then I was like, I'm just gonna figure it out. And that's what happened. That's my story with that.

I like the idea of you have to put, what is it? I'm gonna mess this up, I mess all these up. You have to put wood into the fire, into the stove in order to get fire. I think oftentimes like in the millennial generation, we just kind of expect, and I feel this way, I felt this way throughout my life.

I've had this kind of like, I think, like a young age almost like this like Jesus complex of like, I'm here for this destiny and things will just work out. That's, yeah. I think I'm a millennial, like in a, I feel like I was a first millennial. I'm serious because I feel like the way I'm here for this destiny and things will just work out. That's, yeah. I think I'm a millennial. I think I'm a millennial. I feel like I was a first millennial.

I'm serious because I feel like the way I'm like, I wasn't prioritized marriage, a kid. I just want to build this dream and I believed I could do anything. And I believed that of course it'll work out and then slowly it didn't, you know, so yeah, I get that. But it didn't work. Okay, so, but now it works. Yeah.

And I'm grateful for all the things that were, you know, hard with it. So when I've been in the situation, which is still, I mean, it's still with regularity, like I have an existential crisis almost every day. Okay. Really? Okay.

You don't? Existential. I wouldn't have come existential. I would say I have crisis every day. Little mini crisis. What was the flavor of the crisis what about yours give me what was your existential crisis today? Is it too early? No, it's never too early for an existential crisis. I essentially what I'm talking about right now Like we're gonna burn up by the sun. Oh, oh, that's a lot easier to go into that world because I don't worry about that stuff Yeah I worry about like I'm yeah, I don't think this is simulation. I don't think that's a

50% chance of the simulation that right now we are in a simulator. Absolutely. Have you worn the VR goggles? I have, but that's I knew I was in the goggles and I need touch and I need human interaction. So I'm not when I'm present. I'm so present right now. This is like the kindergarten preschool version of VR. You know, like as you get to the point where it's okay. Now we're going to incorporate like a cool breeze into the VR experience. And now we're going to have somebody actually touch you. And now we'll spray some central oils and smells into the room. What about nature? What about real nature? What about sand? You live on the beach? What

about walking in the ocean and all that stuff? Like, I wouldn't be surprised if at some point in the near future VR gets the point where it would be it would be Close to impossible to tell the difference between whether you're in the simulation or whether you're actually at the beach Like I think maybe I don't know how I've known you have no idea maybe 25 years There's no one that everyone who's California is a good news Yeah, right, so that's and then all of a sudden you're a person, you're in the middle of like, you're in New Jersey or whatever, you're like, cool, I'm going to be sure. I'm going to be sure now.

Yeah, I'm going to be sure now. You're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, I like that. You're like, you're like, you're like, you're like, wow, like I want my relationship with my wife to be this, so I want to have an open relationship and she wants to this and I want to have this kind of, I want to push, push be cool. Okay, we're going to take a quick break and we come back more with Aaron. So how is your work sort of helped you get more in touch with your body and help you with

your sex life if it has? Yeah, I mean, yeah, without a doubt. I think just you read the book Pussy, Mama has. Yeah, I mean, yeah without a doubt. I think just, you read the book, Pussy, Mama Gina. Yeah, I love Mama Gina. Yeah, she's good. So I just finished that recently. So they talk about the, what is it called? The Kagura Festival in Japan?

Yeah. Or they have on the girls come out and it's like based off this old mythological tale where this girl got raped by her brother and then he stabbed her. It wasn't a girl. It was one of the gods of light. Goddess of light. I think I was a god. Yeah. Yeah. And yeah. Right. So her so her god brother ended up like rapin her and told us terrible stuff and like stabbed her pussy

with a some type of rod thing whenever. Jacked her up. So she became all shameful and she ended up moving into this cave. And then when she was in the cave, all of a sudden darkness came upon the world and everything starts turning into this hellish environment. And then there's just other goddess that wanted to pull the goddess of light out of the cave. And so what she did was she gathered up all the deities around the cave and they did this dancing ceremony and the goddess of whatever was earth or something like that. She pulled her pussy out and that was like the dance. She was like showing everybody her pussy. And it was like this liberating thing.

Because look at my stuff. This is me, it's all of me. So within that now they still do that in Japan. How does it have your sex life? Well, just I think exposing your part. I love how your parables do. Exposing your parts is a valuable thing Not like offending anybody but putting yourself in controlled situations where you can actually be every square centimeter of your physical mental emotional self

Is any sexual situation any situation? I think all the other situations lead into a healthy Situation healthy sexual situation. Okay, but like tell me about like though'm trying to, Aaron, I'm trying to talk about the work that you do, you're aligned, like you've been successful with the opening people, and you're just like, going, and I appreciate that. So touching, so physically touching people in all of their different parts, getting into like adductors and like pelvic floor work,

and getting, you do that, that's the work that you kind of help people open up. Yeah, I mean, everything. I put hands and mouths and noses. Yeah, I mean, everything. I put hands and mouths and noses. Yeah, I mean, we touch all the parts. I don't touch like generals or like anus, but people do that. Yeah.

You know, people that have their coxics that's kind of folded under from like falling or something like that, a finger up the bum to help pull that back and be really helpful. Well, how about your client's end if you heard about that because we're gonna get back to your sex life.

Okay. But has your clients said that they, that they, that their sex life says they've had more, do they talk to you about this? Yeah, absolutely. I mean, now at this point, just because I've been doing, working with clients for 16 years, been doing manual therapy stuff for about 12 years. Wow. So in that time, I mean, eventually you just get kind of tired or bored of like the purely

mechanical conversation. And so I really want to hear about people's internal world. And so we're hanging out, we're like, we're talking the whole time. I think we did it last time. We're working together, probably. You know, and so I really want to understand what is it that's what it's the operating systems that you're running that causes your postural patterns to be held in this way. Because if you're currently tenseed. You're like a part therapist, right?

In some ways. Yeah, I mean, I don't say that, but yeah, without a doubt, that's what it ends up being. It's like, okay, so then what, because don't you think there's just this whole opening of that for everybody that I think that helps them? Totally. That we are tense, that we are, having enough blood flow, like if you can't get eruptions or you can't have control over it or for women too, not having orgasm. I feel like every pretty much women,

we can have orgasms, we just don't know how because we've stopped the blood flow, we haven't paid attention, we haven't breathed. And a huge part of getting that blood flow down there is in your brain, in your mind. So you can have full orgasms, you need to ejaculate in your sleep, nothing ever touched your cock, your vagina, your clad or whatever, you're like, you're like a car. You know, like, you know, I brought my tire popped. And I'm like, oh, we changed the tire.

You know, but in the physical body, it's like, oh, no. Like that asthma or that anxiety or that IBS or that fill in the blank dishease that you have, it's very unlikely that you can't get it out of your car. You know, I'm like, oh, I'm going to have to go out and get it out of your car. I'm going to have to go out and get it out of your car. I'm going to have to go out and get it out of your car. I'm going to have to go out and get it out of your car. It's like, oh no, like that asthma or that anxiety or that IBS or that's filling the blank dishears that you have.

It's very unlikely that it's just a product of that one specific point in your body. That's it. So it's it's a symptom. It's a symptom. Yeah, so your body is shooting up a flare saying I've inflammation in my digestive tract. And they're like, okay, cool. Like where is this coming from? It's like, well, I kind of feel shameful in my digestive tract. And they're like, okay, cool. Like, where is this coming from? It's like, well, I kind of feel shameful in my body. I kind of feel like not enough when I walk into a room. I kind of feel isolated and disconnected. You know, like, perhaps that could be a reason for your body

to sell you a level to start to say, like, wow, you're a piece of shit. Like, we need to take you down. You know, and that's like going into places that I'm like out of my like expertise realm, but I think autoimmune disease and things like that. Or there's a really interesting psychosomatic conversation on that.

I mean that too. You might say it's a attack itself. It's like, huh, why would you attack me? Exactly. So that's on your realm. But what if we were bros? Exactly. Well, I believe that too.

So what about confidence though? I would think that a lot of your patients do come in and say to your clients, do you say clients or patients, if they come into you and they're like, they don't feel confident, they don't love their bodies, they don't feel... So, think like adolescent girls have the highest incidence of scoliosis. So, scoliosis, your spine starts to curl over and twist and put you in this curled, contracted twisted place in your form. So as you're an adolescent girl, your chest is growing in these weird ways and bloods coming

out of your body and guys are starting to objectify you. And there's this weird competition. It's like, for a lot of people, I think a decent option would be to come to school and just put a box over their body. Exactly. That's what they hunt in. So it's like, okay, well, that wouldn't be socially acceptable to put a box over my body. But I could hide and wrinkle and twist inside of my own form and kind of convey to my internal self that, okay, people can't see me. I just don't want to be seen. You know, so a big part of having structural alignment

is to be okay with being entirely seen. You know, so when someone comes in and they have kind of like a folded, like high speak into that mental emotional part through changing the physical form, and we can also start to speak into the physical form by talking through the mental emotional part. I mean, that's a lot though.

I would think you will come into you because that's what you're, you're a whole thing is structural engineering. Not everybody knows what structural engine you have to understand. Not everybody knows what that is. So you're going to have to break down some of this because that's your, that's what you do. And in your book, I'm sure the line method, structural engineer, what is it? What is it?

Like you work on people that don't even try to know structural integration would be a term. It's an integration. That's what I mean. Like people because people keep, okay, we are in LA. My friends have had it. I was like, I'm going to see it. You should go simultaneously. Let's speak.

Go see my SI person. Oh, good. Oh, you like Sammy with the SI world. Great. Yeah. I don't think you met. Yeah. It's a structural integration.

Yeah, it means a great term. But you're not doing that. Isn't this part of what you do? Roll phase. It's been what I've done for the last decade. And now it's turned in more into like. You're being invasive. I'm asking you. So it's questions. Right? what I've done for the last decade. And now it's turned into more into like, You're being invasive. I'm asking you to express this.

Right? I need you to answer. Like, what? No, start with the, yeah. What's the question? I'm not talking to you. I'm not talking to you. No, what's the question?

Hit me with a question. I want to know. I won't tell any more parables. I love your parables. I'm just saying, OK, we don't also want to say or we talk about breath and sex. Tell me about your sex life. Tell me your dating life.

I don't know what you were talking about. Well, sex life. A dating? Yeah, well, so with sex life, like I mentioned, like I've, the thing that I'm most enamored with these days is being emotionally vulnerable with especially a female. I think throughout my 20s, most of my 20s, I would have liked to have believed

that I was available, but I wasn't. I was totally closed down contracting. And so what I ended up doing instead, what I would do essentially be like the dose accus man of adventure was like my goal. So I would do essentially be like the dose ecke's man of adventure was like my goal. So I would do motorcycle, I did it seven months long motorcycle trip through Mexico and Central America

and living in a hammock and surfing and taking pictures next to hot Mexican chicks and showing the world like, look, look at me, I'm doing it. We're climbing mountains or doing these things. It's kind of like a right of passage of some sort, I think. And all that was again just like more mass.

So it turned from like muscle mask to now like life adventure mask. And now I'm just starting to become like tired, I think. Right, but tired of that. To make me tired of that. To make me tired of like, that was a lot, but that's also kind of just like, maybe it's also running from what's happened. Totally. I mean, because I had a 20s very, sometimes I do feel like a dude,

like I was a lot of the ways I've coped, but in my 20s, same thing, adventure, travel. So now you can back and you're like, oh, that was very external, but now you're ready to like feel. I mean, I think I am. I mean, that sounds like the mountain. That is me.

So before it was like, like surf this big wave, or do you know whatever the thing, now it's like I'm pretty sure just being completely okay with being seen especially by a woman in any state. You know, not feeling like I need to put up some type of wall and maybe dodge some question by telling some Japanese parable. Yeah. Exactly.

Yeah, but it was good. I was with you. They're flashing pussies and I loved all the way. But that was real. That was legit. That was meaningful. That was meaningful. We got it.

It's weird. It's weird that we have cockshame or anishame. I've been ashamed of my anus since I was a little guy. I'm still ashamed. What? Which why? No, I don't feel like that. Beautiful. Do you think your anus is beautiful? I don't hate it. I mean still shanemainis. What? Which why? I don't know. I don't feel like that beautiful.

Do you think your anus is beautiful? I don't hate it. I mean, I don't like my I hate my I hate my like do you mean like my anal open like my butt or like my anal opening? I don't. The whole the whole thing. Like if I were to expose my anus like the like the the Japanese deity exposed in her pussy, it would be a lot of there be a

moment as I was I was looking into the the Kyoto Japanese parable thing. like the Japanese deity exposing her pussy, it would be a lot of, there'd be a moment. As I was looking into the Kyoto Japanese parable thing, I saw this YouTube video of this girl, she's an art exhibit and she was standing in front of this vagina picture and she just pulled up her skirt and just showed her pussy for like, it was like five minutes, so I was like the duration of a song

and all the people at the museum were there just like, stand her, she's just sitting, Stan, her Gishy just sitting. Where were you? It was just YouTube. I'm just looking at YouTube. A research. So she just shows her pussy. She sits there.

You know, and everyone starts applauding and it's like this amazing thing and like the guards are trying to like, stop her from showing her pussy. And it's like this. That's amazing. I think more people ought to do stuff like that. Thank you.

Would you do something like that? Would you expose yourself? I'll do it with you It's a challenge. I'd want a team member. Yeah, so it sounds like Why not right I like it's been a while since I've been kicked out of anyway. Oh, that's good. Yeah So Aaron to tell me so so your. So you're doing this work though that I would think would be like even us you came in, we're doing the the acro yoga, which I am on your Instagram. I've seen it Is it what is your Instagram? Aligned podcast. I cast a line.

I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, and you're doing a lot of this stuff that is very, it's like intimate or breathing. We're like, you're flipping me around, you're doing it with other people too on the beach. I see that's not just special, but there is a connection that you have with people. And to me, we're talking about the three kinds of touch. Most people go right into the penetration. It's sort of like this for play that is so mean that I think if a lot of it just spent more time stretching and moving before sex and before any kind of interaction, maybe

you can even get a dry brush and just start dry brushing your body. You know, like, your skin, it's the largest, the largest organ of your whole system. You know, your fascia, your connective tissue has more sensory receptors than your eyes. For, for ever, it was like your eyes are most sensitive places. Like, no, your, like your body, your fascia, like all that stuff. Like a dry brush, I haven't used it yet. Oh, it's great. It's like a gift. Like, it's like another thing to do. Yeah, so before you get in the shower or whatever, like all that stuff. I'm like a dry brush, I haven't used it yet. Oh, it's great. It's like a gift. It's like another thing to do. Yeah, so before you get in the shower or whatever, like scratch your back and scratch

your butt and the back of your hand strings. I'm not joking. Yep. Okay. Yeah, your calves and the bottoms of your feet, something like that, like we need to create a body map of awareness of where we are in space. Is that some kind of circulation? Yeah, stimulates brain function, stimulates creativity, stimulates circulation.

Like you, your brain is like the brain brain. That's like a processing system up in your head. Like your brain really, like your, is really your whole body. And they call your guts your second brain. It's got millions of neurons and it relates throughout. And it's, you know, it's like, I think 95% of the dopamine is created inside of your,

your guts as well. It's like they call it your second brain. It's just your brain. Your whole body is your brain. Exactly. When you put yourself in a certain postural pattern, it affects the way that you think and the way that you feel. If you can start to take baseline fundamental mechanics, which is what I get into the

line method, of essentially it's a driver's manual for how to operate your body and your mind. So, if you have this baseline fundamental mechanics of how to move on a momentary basis, you're good. You know, you'll be 100 years old and still be autonomous and still be strong and still be working on getting better at tennis or whatever it is that you're into working on. So in your book, people can actually read this and learn these methods that you've been prepared for so many years. Yeah, without a doubt. So they will learn the little incremental methods it takes to kind're into working on. So in your book, people can actually read this and learn these methods that you've given for so many years.

Yeah, without a doubt. So they will learn the little incremental methods it takes to kind of realign ourselves. Yeah. And then so there's, so it's broken down into five, like movement principles. So it's just like five daily movement practices that people can start to integrate. It's super simple. Okay. That has massive reward.

One is just spending more time in the ground. On the ground, yeah, you talk about that. It's a huge deal. So cultures around the world that spend any amount of time on the ground. So they eat on the ground, they poo, they pee, they just like are down in those positions. They've minimal to no incidents of australia

thrice around the hips of the knees. Just sitting on the ground. Without without without. And on the ground, yeah. So you, you, you, those positions, what your body needs in the same sense of like how you need to be like a scene, you know, in order to not have like a shadow around certain parts, you also need to be moved.

So your body is built to be moved in all these different positions that in a natural environment, which is where you've come from for the last ever, you would be squatting down on the ground, you would be reaching out, maybe grabbing off of a branch, you would be, you know, like, it would be natural part of your life. Yeah, you're eating around a fire, you're all, you know, you're down and then you're up and then you're down and you're up. That has been built into your biology to heal all of your parts and to circulate all of your fluids.

When we're in these positions where we just become like talking heads, here we just sit, face moves moves, I'm doing working, like, that's like your body's like, what are we doing? You're working on the floor? You're sitting on the floor, like working on the floor? Sex on the floor?

Sex on the floor, yeah. So getting yourself like a really comfortable rug, like making the floor really inviting and comfortable to a huge deal. That's what I've just done at my house. I was like, I just want everything to be comfortable and cozy, I'm gonna be able to sit. And sex in the floor really inviting and comfortable as a huge deal. That's what I've just done at my house. I was like, I just want everything to be comfortable and cozy. I'll be able to sit. And sex in the bed really is, I mean,

it's kind of restrictive unless you're creative. Like if you're having, if you have like a comfy floor area, you know, and there's like, there's like cushions and there's a couch and you can roll around the room and now we're in another room. And now all of a sudden we're like,

you know, that's what, yeah, that's absolutely. Yeah, like imagine doing like, if people do jiu-jitsu or something like that, imagine doing jiu-jitsu on a bed, be like, okay, we can do this, but like, can we just get a mat? Right. You know, I'm trying to like be able to move,

I want to like throw and twist and turn. You know, so- No limitations. No limitations. Yeah. Yeah, so make your ground comfortable and friendly and inviting. And then as you're sitting down while you're checking your male,

like your email or your eating or, you know, whatever you do, get your, your butt up on a, on a high cushion. It's really important that your butt is raised up above your knees. That way you're sitting on the front edge of the sit bones. And then you start to stack your spine. So now you're putting yourself into that position of elongation, which is a healing, confident position. And now you get all the way up from that position and you're more confident, you're more circulated. You just feel better.

That's my meditation cushion. Like, yeah, it's supposed to be elevated or knees down. That's right. That makes sense. Yeah, our bodies are built to heal. Like your body going through a chronic pattern of dis ease, you know, we like we light more fires and then we have to extinguish them. And then we wake up, we light more fires and we have to see a therapist extinguishing. That's not human. That's a product of you going against your natural movement patterning and thought patterning, I think, as well. Like hunter-gatherer tribes, their concept of

work is a lot more playful. You know, they're problem solving and they're walking and they're, you know, they're, they're, they're, okay, cool, their storm is coming. We have to figure out how to do this. We have to build shelter. Oh, I hunted an animal. So I'm, I'm tracking and I'm looking at the, you know, the, the prints on the ground and I'm, you know, I can smell in the breeze like you're, your whole body's lit up.

Like that is you You know, so when you go on some trip, you know, so some far off land or you know, whatever I think it's people should play make believe Yeah, you know get your partner. I don't think we play enough. We need to play We do that's the foundation of your health and well-being and your sexual health, which is another foundation of your health and well-being It is I mean for sure playing for sex it takes sex so seriously we get bored with sex because we're having sex in the bed all the time. Yeah get out of that bed.

And we're not doing something different. Yeah, we can do better. That's how we started. Throw up on the counter. Exactly throw up on the counter. Because it's much easier to throw around throw up on the counter. Yeah do something different. Aaron Alexander.

You're amazing. around throw up on the counter. Yeah, do something different. Aaron Alexander. You're amazing. People can find you at AlignPodcast.com and at AlignPodcast everywhere, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter, ALIG, and all the places. And get your book pre-order it. They can. I greatly appreciate that. This will be in our show notes. Yeah. The line method. There's an online program as well that exists. It's also called the

line method. So all the stuff that we're talking about in here, and that's all in there. Then we get into lifestyle stuff. Another aspect of the book slash, I think just like meaningful things, is moving your senses, you know, so starting to incorporate more sensuality, which is all the touch stuff as well, but also noticing the sounds in your environment, also noticing your visual spectrum, are you chronically staring into a cell phone, which is inherently stressful? Yes. Are you chronically inside of these boxed walls where you're not able to actually look

out over the horizon, like you've done for, again, the last forever, this brand new stuff that we're in a position where we're so concealed and contracted and inside. Right. So when you're looking up close at your cell phone, literally the, they're called the ciliary muscles in your eyes, they contract in order to refract that light. They need to bend that light, pretty to perceive it. When you look out into the distance, all of a sudden those muscles don't need to bend the light because it can come in straight on and your muscles of your eyes can just relax.

And so when you look into the over the ocean or the mountains or maybe we don't have enough nature in our life. We don't need supplements. We need nature. Yeah, we're doing all this bullshit to replicate nature and you're spending like top dollar for it. Like go for a walk in the park. You can just leave your house right now.

Walk outside. Listen to this podcast while you're walking. Yeah. That's what I do, listen to podcasts. Okay, you're like, I gotta see the questions. We have five rapid fire, right? Ready? Yep.

What is your biggest turn on? Mm. I think I quite like, and I mean, there's, so just go and straight to like graphic sexuality. I quite like when a girl attempts to be aggressive, because then it gives me permission to like, like really be aggressive. You know, like, so like having like that, that game of kind of like cat and mouse, I think

is very cool. Like, kind of like she's after years. Yeah, so if you're like a like the like the dead fish thing, I'm just like, why don't we don't here? Right, right. This is not it. Okay, so you wanted to bring it. Bring it a little bit. I got it.

Biggest turn off. Dead fish. So that, but then also poor body mechanics. So for girls, like has big fake tits, but no ass, and she's walking around and heels and just like the mechanics of her body. If she was in the woods, and that's really what we're looking at, that's why men are attracted to big booties.

As big booties and indicator that she's going to be able to a birth child, but also maybe help with building, help with gathering, and help up and down. So if you have good hip mechanics, then you'll naturally develop a sexy booty. But if you if you have good hip mechanics, then you'll naturally develop a sexy booty. But if you don't have good hip mechanics, and you're just like plastic surgery-izing yourself, like it's not sexy.

Okay, got it. That's okay. What makes good sex? It's good. Sensuality, connection, breath. I think just connection, like having meaningful connection the whole time with someone that you actually love and care about, realizing that you literally are merging with that person.

Like there's a fancy unnecessary term called tologeny, which is theoretical, but when you're jizzing inside of a girl, I love that word. It doesn't exist. It's good, it just, I love when you say it. Yeah, so when you're jizzing inside of a girl, she literally, I love when you say it. Yeah, yeah. So when you're using it side of a girl, she literally, potentially, look up to Lodge and it's fun. She takes on your genetics or the genetics of that male. And so when you have a child,

you're actually potentially having a child of all of the men that have ever just inside of you. Yeah, exactly. So the reason I was saying that, one, it's just interesting and fun. And it's theoretical as well, look it up, it's just fun. No, no, I've heard this. Yeah.

So within the, that's what, like, hunter-gatherer tribal cultures have thought forever. There's another term that I don't remember, but they thought that once you fill a girl up with enough semen to build, to create life, that's when a human forms. Yeah, I've heard this too. And that's also why the penis is shaped the way it is.

The pull of the seminar from your main. It pulls that Jizz out. To pull the other Jizz out. Yeah, pull that Jizz out. And potentially why? This is all, do you know Chris Ryan? You have one here before? Yes, that's exactly, yeah.

No, I haven't had a mom, but I know what I don't know. Yeah, I had lunch with him like eight years ago. Okay, great. I told you we'd love to see him again. Yeah, that would be great. So he broke down for me the female copulatory, what is it, vocalization, Michael's moan, which potentially, again, all that stuff is theoretical, but potentially the reason that is, because it's almost like weird, like why don't guys moan like that?

He said, I should make my moves. I agree. More noise. Yeah. So, within that though, the reason for this female copulatory vocalization potentially is to attract more males to increase the likelihood of getting pregnant. Pregnant. Yeah, exactly. And also isn't it because to let the men know that she's actually with someone too at that moment. Well, I think I think that what it is, what that theory is saying is that it's, it's, you're letting you know that you're

with someone, but it's letting you know, know like your flat your flowers open. My flower is open. Come on in. Yeah. Flowers open boys. Okay. What would you tell your younger self about sex? The same thing. Be careful with hooking up with people that you don't want to become. You know, so if you don't want to merge with a person, you know, stay away. Like the, like what's it called, Jim run. I posted on the on the gram today, I quote from Jim, right? So you you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with. I've heard that. That's true. So I'd say you become the average of, you know, the people that you sleep with as well. Huh. Yeah. So watch out for food. Yeah. If you're in a powder, we're now

dating the same people who are over getting you might want to stop that. Yeah, I think I'm gonna serve you anymore. Yeah, I think so many people like were we're practicing sex work, which is nothing. I don't know about any issue of sex work. I think it'd be great if it was legal personally, but that's like a bigger conversation. Obviously, there's like lots of different conversations that I'm saying like controlled, like empowered females. Like this is what I wanna do and I wanna support the world,

and all that stuff, like human trafficking. It's a super not okay thing. But we're like the one sex work. Like if you're hanging out with somebody that you just wanna slam your body against them, like that's the reason you're calling them. And you're like, do you wanna, we could, do you want to,

we could, could she dinner? It's gonna feel good, yeah. Yeah, it's like, dude, just bang. I just meet up and have sex. You know, like, what are we doing on these obstacles and hanging out with people that we don't really want to spend time? I don't know, I don't know with that.

I think it's for intimacy, even. We wouldn't say that, but we want, we maybe we're, you know, because we could just masturbate, but we're like, we want to be- Oh, yeah, masturb masturbation is such a powerful tool every time I have that potential inclination to reach out to somebody that I'm like Oh, like I don't I'm not like I'm love with this person. Yeah, I don't really but we can have sex and be fun It would feel good And then you masturbate you're just like well back to work People that are potentially people that you are potentially not right for you are just

stuck in. Yeah, they're not right. What are you doing in your time? Yeah. You know, you're investing yourself into that same thing with work. You know, if you're investing yourself into some work that doesn't feed your soul and doesn't support you, you're developing roots into that work. Yeah, that's true.

And it's your meeting all the people within that space and you're learning about that. And you tell yourself that in five years You'll get over the hump and you're gonna like do your own thing is like dude in five years You've grown your roots so deep into dissatisfaction. That's all you have now you have to uproot all that shit But you got to find our passion. I think you're gonna find that passion. It's true. Okay number one sex tip God, I think I'm so consistent with all my things. I think it's all like Yeah, yeah, just focusing on connection You know, okay and lubrication

Communications lubrication it's true. You got that right. I think it's right here Okay, thank you so much to your Alexander for being here check my line podcast. This was fun Yeah, thanks so much. All right guys. Thanks for listening to the show Thanks for reviewing us wherever you listen to podcasts, giving us five stars, that's awesome, share with a friend, and thanks to amazing team Ken, Kristen, Michelle, Elisa, producer, Jamie and Michael. Was it good for you? Email me, feedback at sexwithamily.com. you