Sex With Emily - Making Moves & Sex in the News with Menace

Episode Date: August 28, 2019

On today’s show, Emily is reunited with radio personality, friend, & former co-host Menace, & they’re going over some current Sex In The News. Plus, they’re answering your emails.They chat about the most annoying parts of sex that no one likes to talk about but most of us have been through, how Siri & other smart devices may be listening in on our sexual encounters, & what to do when your partner is hung up on your past.Follow Emily on all social: @sexwithemilyFor even more sex talk, tips, & tricks visit sexwithemily.comFor more info on Menace, click HERE.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I had a freshman when I was a my see you answer. Nope, my see you answer. I want to answer you though. No, maybe. Because I have another, no, I have another thing that I want to say. Because I don't, I don't want, I don't want, no. I'm just saying I don't want Jordan to be like my ex girlfriend where he comes back a year and a half and he wants to be with that girl.

Sure, it's work and heart. I believe in true love. That's why you're here. I believe in true love. That's why you're over here. I believe in true love. I love this penis. It gives me power. This is from Rebecca. I know you can't see it because it's a podcast,

but she's swinging a penis at me in anger as we're talking. And it's a hard beat. It's like, oh, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's taken eye out with that thing. OK. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. On today's show, I'm joined by Radio Personality Menace. Now, you might know him from the Woody show, or if you're new to this show, he was my co-host for many years, and he's dropped by for some sex in the news and to answer your questions.

Topics include, the most annoying parts of sex that no one talks about, but most of us have been through. How serious other smart devices may just be listening in on us having sex. What to do when it seems your partner has a hang-up on your sexual past, and how to get over your pre-nerbs of potentially starting a long distance relationship? All this and more, thanks for listening! Look into his eyes! They're the eyes of a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man.

I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man.

I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man.

I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a man. I'm not a cute. The girls got a hair stand. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common all the way? What do you mean, like laundry? It shrinks. Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm so dumb.

Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, check out sexwithemily.com. You can also find me on Series X and Radio. It's channel stars 109. It's Monday through Friday, 5-7pm. Pacific. You can get a free 30-day trial at sexwithemily.com slash S-X-M. And you can find me on all social media across the board. It's at Sex with Emily. All right, guys, I hope you enjoy the show.

All right, so I'm here with Menace. If you don't know who Menace is, Menace. Menace is at Menace everywhere, Emmy and me. Yeah, on Twitter and Instagram. And you might recognize him from the morning show, the Woody Show. Yes, the Woody show, it's naturally syndicated. You can check it out at thewoodishow.com

or it's podcasted daily. Just search the Woodie Show on iHeartRadio on iHeartRadio app. Amazing. You don't do the intro anymore. So just a little background story. If people don't know, if you're new, if I'm new to you on this X with Emily podcast, I've been, I don't know, kind of involved with your podcast. What, 13 years or so? Yeah, I've been doing it for 14, so I probably bet you, I bet you, I don't know, kind of involved with your podcast. So, what, 13 years or so?

Yeah, I've been doing it for 14, so I probably met you. I bet you were in. It's like a year and you know. I met you a year and I met you in 2006 when I started doing a radio show. Yeah, and then I haven't been around for maybe like a year or so. Right. And the reason being is I was like, I don't know, I think I was down the dumps. I usually go through this thing where I get too fat,

and I don't wanna see anybody. And I think that happened to me. And again, this weird thing, like, oh, I don't wanna, you know, I get at a point where I don't wanna see anybody, but I've been back in the gym like an hour a day. Wow. Every day, I still need to lose like 30 more pounds, I think. But for how, no, you look amazing.

But I think I'm in a comfortable position where I get actually go out and see people again Wow, how much do you get so you gained? Yeah, just gained like way too much way I never even I never even went on the scale to go look But I just knew it was bad because every time you know, they take a photo or something Oh, that doesn't look good or you like you try to crop it at a certain point and he there's not enough crops left You try to crop it at a certain point. And there's not enough crops left. So yeah, and I think it was really bad.

I'm friends with this comedian, his name is Joe Koi. He has a special right now, and Netflix, you can check it out. It's called Coming in Hot, it's hilarious. But I went to one of its shows, and it was my birthday. And after the show, he got the entire staff of the comedy club to sing Happy Birthday to me. It was super funny. It was super nice. But when I saw the video myself, when he was singing to me, I'm like, oh man, that's horrible.

Okay, so then it looked really bad. So then that kind of thing. And your members, so you worked as a October? Yeah. And then, so then I did some vacations and you always have to hog out while you're on vacation Of course, but when I got back and it was a you know a new year I figured okay Gotta do something so then I just slowly and you know what helped me so much is the eye watch

The eye watch like completing your activity rings every single day that has helped me so much. Yeah Well, it's called it's called that no it's called, it's called Apple Watch. No, it's called the Apple Watch. See, look at you. You're correcting me on tech. Yeah, what the hell did I watch? You mean the Apple Watch? Anyways, long story short,

it's been like involved with your podcast for a number of years. I haven't been around for a year. Back here today, because I miss you so much. I often't been around for a year back here today because I miss you so much. Yeah. I often ask about you all the time, and I talk about you all the time, but I just just so you know for some history,

is that I started the podcast in 2005, and in end of 2006, I got an offer to do a live radio show on a FM station when San Francisco, they're doing FM talk. It was cool, free FM. And they're like, and I'd never done radio before. And I was like, oh my God, okay. And I wasn't like, I started a podcast to get on radio.

I was doing a podcast. So they all they told me, they called me, went in. It was Saturday night. And they got in maybe like a 30 minutes for the show, was an 11 p.m. show. And the guy said, oh no, maybe it was the day before the show. Whoever the program director says, okay, here's the cough button. and that was about it.

Like if you cough, you press this button, have a good show. So then I show up the next night and menace is working with the board. Yeah, so I got assigned to you and they said, well, she's never done radio before and this is right after like Janet Jackson, and And the FCC came down on Radio Hardcore. You had to be super clean. And they're like, oh yeah. So here is Emily. She's never done a radio show before.

And she does the podcast about sex. Keep an eye on the dump. It's called the dump button where I have the cut out certain sections of what you're saying because it's not appropriate for the radio. So Emily has no idea. And then I love it when, so when I got assigned and help put the show on the air,

when you couldn't say certain things, you had perfect view of me hitting that bun. And you would say live on the air, why did you hit that bun? I can't say. And you would repeat the thing that I just cut out. I can't say blotup. And then you kept dumping it again. And like, why can't I say blotup?

And then you dumped it again. Yeah. I'm like, why are you doing that? So yeah, it's funny. When I decided he hated me. Oh no, I was stressful. You were stressful. But don't you actually run out of dump tape? Yeah, at a certain point, you hated me. Oh no, I was stressful. It was stressful.

Don't you actually run out of dump tape? Yeah, at a certain point, you run out, and then you have to cut to commercial. Yeah. So, yeah, we did that for, I don't know, about... A year and a half, two years? Yeah, a year and a half, two years. And then...

The station we had business. Yeah, that's the... Yeah, they switched formats. Yeah, they switched formats. It was like a dumpster fire. And then, you know, you just continued the podcast and I think there's been like so many different variations of you just keeping this thing going.

Stopping. And I always, I know you probably never hear it, but I always shout you out on the radio and on podcasts all the time on like how you just kept this thing going and like has built this empire. Yeah, well now we see men is that podcasting is a thing. I know, right? You were just cool.

You're like, I'll do it with you. And you're so great men. It's because men is like the hardest working person I know. I mean, I believe at the time you were sleeping at the radio station. Yeah, absolutely. You're sleeping at a car like a big prop. And you must have been 25 maybe or now.

I was probably like, yeah, 23, 24. I mean, yeah, 23, 24, maybe. You were sleeping at the station and I didn't even know that. But you were so much, there's things you work so hard. And I didn't pay you until a few years ago, I think. I don't think you ever, I wasn't making money. But you just kept showing up and do what you used to let me sneak into CBS after hours,

because you were CBS radio and we would do it after hours. Sorry, CBS. And then you would, and then you would be at Stitcher. Stitcher. So cool. We used to record in this tiny little booth. Like, it was so hot. There's no air conditioning. There's no air conditioning.

You're dying and we would do a show every single day from that one year. We did it from 12 to one every day. Yeah. We tried to have video cameras. We tried every iteration, but I, and I think it's because of you two, minus you were there for me. Like I hadn't, I wouldn't have known. I do, I still don't know how to upload it.

There's no issue. I don't think I ever was do, I still don't know how to upload it. There's too many. I don't think I ever was the one who was on the technical part of the show. I don't think I ever really was the one who uploaded it. I mean, there was one point where you had to do some technical stuff where you moved to Los Angeles. And it was a year before I moved to LA.

I had no idea I was gonna move to LA a year later. But we would continue the podcast and you would have a recorder. My little MP3 because that little tiny M.O.O. player. And you would be on the phone and I would be on the phone with a recorder and then we would match up the files

and make some like we were in the room together. But on telling you people, if you're listening to this podcast, the first 45 minutes was me just making sure that Emily was recording on her end. Yeah, exactly. They kept it going, but nice, you always showed up for me. You really did. You were like, you didn't have to?

I try. Yeah, but thank you. I knew it was always fun being around you and doing this. And that's, you know, I always thought, I did radio and I did the podcasting stuff and I go the money will come later and it definitely It does it like anybody listens like if you go after something that you're super passionate about it and you do Well and people recognize that and they'll eventually pay you. It's true You know and I and I knew

podcasting would eventually be a thing It's definitely took a lot longer than I thought it would be, but it finally became super easy and accessible to the general public. Sorry, sometimes it's not great with my words, but it'd be easy for people to find. Yeah, I mean, it really did when I think about it, because now I've been at it for so long,

even if someone said, how do I start a podcast today? I mean, I started it before did when I think about it because now I've been it for so long like even if someone said How do I start a podcast today? I mean I started it before there was really a podcast But I would say the advice would still be just to keep keep doing it be consistent Do it all the time, but I don't know what else I would I mean I think I made a lot of mistakes with it too Maybe but the best thing was just to keep going yeah, I think being supportive of other podcasts too Definitely helps if you. If you're and if you're listening to this and you want to start your own podcast, um, yeah, well, let's give some advice. What do you think being supportive? Yeah, having other podcasts. Be supportive.

And then definitely bringing people on. So, um, we haven't even talked, but I do a podcast once a week now, but it's basically about traveling food and then I interview like artists and things like that. That's what's it called. It's called the What's New Podcast with Menace. I like that. Yeah, you can search Menace on the I Heart Radio app and find it or just go to What's NewPod.com. But I interview people like Tom DeLong from Blink 182 and I'll ask him, he's super in aliens and then so the you know the big move it storm area 51. and I'll ask him, he's super in aliens and then so the big move it's storm area 51. So I'll ask some things like that. Okay. And then of course, you know, I love food and I love travel. And of course, he's like, you know, like cruises and going different. Yeah, all over the place. So

that's what I talk about. Not really about sex. I did have one adult film star on. His name's Ryan Driller. Okay. Driller, is that his real name? No, but you would love him, he's great, he was a great guest, so I'm definitely gonna recommend him to you. But of course, me, I don't really even ask him about sex, I just ask him like, how does- Of course not. I just ask him how his job affected his family

and how his family took it and stuff like that. We rarely didn't talk about your sex a lot. I mean, we always had to show about sex, but you didn't often talk about your own sex life. Because I didn't think it was as entertaining as the guests. Yeah, but sometimes we didn't have guests. Yeah, but people are not at the sex-to-only podcast to hear about your sex life.

To hear about my sex life. I'm not sure. They want to know about your sex life. Your relationship. My relationship is great. You're still in it, right? I'm still in it. How many years and now?

Eight plus, but here's something here Here's an announcement We are getting married next year. No way. Yeah, menace. Yeah, so happy Yeah, I mean you probably don't know because we didn't like go on social media There's no photo of me on my knee with a ring or anything like that. But yeah. I'm gonna cry right now, I'm so happy for you.

So next year. Can I come? It's going down. No pressure. But I hope Tom will give you a great time. Of course it's gonna be the most annoying topic of life if you listen to the show for a number of years. I always talk about Las Vegas

and a will-be-n-l Las Vegas. And of course, the Las Vegas. I of course, it will be Las Vegas. I want Las Vegas to be my second home. And it pretty much is, I'm there almost. You actually debunked my myth about Las Vegas. I'm like, guys who love Las Vegas are kind of like guys really into gambling and cheating on their partners.

But you actually are not. No, I wasn't there. I was just there last Friday and I saw Janet Jackson. Oh my God, really? Yeah. Yeah, you still, you do love Vegas. That's great. I'm so happy you guys stuck this out.

Thank you. Yeah. Wow. That's it. I'm going on with your life. I just want to go ahead. I just want to go ahead. Okay, so my life is interesting.

You know, it's funny. I don't, you know me. I never listened to these shows. I don't go. I'm not as used to headed the shows, right? Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. But I really have not listened to, I would say in almost 15 years of

podcasts, I've probably listened from start to finish maybe four or five. And I've probably done thousands. Yeah. I started 14 years ago. And we were always at 14 years ago, which you can recall was like, I was like learning about sex. I did not my doctorate. I was like, Oh my God, I went to my first sex party.

I was with Captain of Rotacomb. Remember, all the people who were on early stages and then I was in open relationships and I was exploring it all. And I went through periods where I'd have like three dates a weekend or dating three guys at once. And then I was in relationships with people and you've met some of the guys.

Yeah. And now we're in my app. Now I actually had another break from dating for the last seven months. I'm going to be 20. Yeah, because last time we were talking about you were with somebody. Oh, right.

Yeah. Yep, not with them anymore. No. So I broke up with him like seven, eight months ago. And I decided that it was just a time to kind of work on me again. I used to call them Manatorium, giving up men, which I did that once before, like 10 years

ago. Yeah. And then it was a big thing. And I actually did it. Like I did not have sex, I think, for like, whatever, a few months. So I really just worked on like making a home and making this business, you know, we started the show in serious seven months ago. So now I'm starting to date again, but I don't have a lot of information about that other

than like I feel like I'm in a good place right now to Start date. How are you doing it? I'm on my own. I got fixed up with someone who only wanted to sex and have sex. Yeah, that was my first date I got fixed up with someone. He was actually really cute and I was like But it wasn't like he only wants to have sex with me because you think well sector them. Well, of course What else am I gonna do with someone with such a name? think well, sector, then, of course, what else am I gonna do with someone with such a name? I, I, I, mon apps, I don't love you in the app. Some get into that. That apps are crazy.

So I have a friend. Yeah. Who posts all the messages that she gets from guys on, on our social page. I mean, she hides up their identity. Right. But. Oh, hilarious stuff. I'm, well, guys are really messaging women like this.

This isn't insane. Yeah, exactly. Oh, the guys are, oh well, I just sold my company and I have a bunch of free time and I would love to take you out on a date. Or my dog just died and oh, I'll pay $50 to see your feet. Yeah. Well, dude, speaking of the foot fetish thing,

I gotta tell you something really funny about that. So, it's a good side hustle if you guys want to start it. Yeah, right? The feet stuff. It is more and more prevalent now. So, I got interviewed by a journalist in Montreal yesterday. And she has been a fan of the podcast for 10 years,

at least because she says, well, I remember you and Menace, and it's just so weird to me, she was like throwing back me, and she was, you and Menace, to use talk about foot fetishes and say, we're confused, but if you have a foot fetish, email us, call us, talk to us, and no one would come up about,

no one would follow up. It'd be a code that we've been trying to crack forever. And I'm rocking this up on the morning show that I work on, the Woody show. Still, I try to get calls. I've cracked it. Oh, okay, good, thank you. I've totally cracked it. And, okay, good. Thank you.

I've totally cracked it. And we actually did a show about it yesterday. We're doing a serious show. But it was just funny that she was throwing back to that. And I was like, God, you've really been listening a long time. She remembered a ton of things that I did not remember. But then it's like, so first of all, we do understand more about it now. And I just saw the Quentin Tarantino film because he has a foot fetish.

Yeah. Do you know that? There's a lot of the dirty feet in one scene. Yeah, I know he had one, yeah. So I haven't seen one. I haven't seen the movie. I saw a movie before you. I know, that there's a lot of the dirty feet in one scene. I know he had one, yeah. So I haven't seen one. I haven't seen the movie. I saw a movie before you. I know, that's insane. I might not see movies with me anymore.

But anyway, I saw what's time and yeah, he keeps planking down these foot fetishes, but it's just interesting, because it goes back like since the beginning of time, people have had foot fetishes. And a lot of us do with the feet being, having so many nerve rings in it, looks, first of all, reflexology,

how people can like pressure points on the foot can actually feel really good. For it to the foot look like a penis. A lot of men have early fantasies in life or they don't even realize it, but like they could be like in class when they're like nine years old. And maybe they're like 12 and they're just starting

to have like feelings about sexual feelings, but maybe at that same moment, their teacher is saying something very loving to them. And at the same moment, they're looking down to the teacher's feet, and then all of a sudden, feet get linked up with erotic images. And then whenever they have to get off, they have to think about feet, they have to have feet

in front of them, and the features can be an erotic zone. And I feel like now, foot porn is one of the top search terms on all the porn sites. Yeah, but is it because it's talked about and then it's put into people's heads that they should go check it out? No, I believe what it is is that people actually have, it's kind of like a latent foot fetish so that it might already be festering inside but they're repressing it.

But now that it's more available, they're like, oh yeah, that's familiar to me. I actually am into foot fetishes. So I think people are coming out more and more and so all these women that I's more available, they're like, oh, yeah, that's familiar to me. I actually am into foot fetishes. So I think people are coming out more and more. And so all these women that I, not yet, since I just started on apps, they're all getting guys asking for feet. And that was not happened 10 years ago. So I don't know, like, it's a tail wagging the dog here. What came first, but I think foot fetishes the most common fetish.

Yeah. For many reasons. That's one of them. I guess that halfway explains it to me because I still think of, you know, the female body and so many other things I would like to highlight other than the feet, you know. But here's the other thing. We all know you've learned this that men's sex can get very boring, right? And we all need to update our sexual bag of tools, our sexual toolkit as well. And so if you, if, if feet can be a right, I'm telling you, I've had my foot feet toe sucked on and they were clean. And it feels really good. I mean, it kind

of, it, it feels very erotic to have like this appendage in a way, going to someone's mouth and they're sucking on in it. It can, it is sexy. And so if you have something else on our body, we get bored. If you're just going for my genitals. I'm already bored. Hmm after a few months So why not bring the feed in if it's something that you haven't tried yet I'm just saying so that's what it is. Yes, we have all the other things but for some people it can be really Rotic not for everybody just something else to play with Okay, good to know all right So so anything else with your,

did you think else with your, your sex life or anything? My sex life or your relationship life or I think it's better now that again, I've gone back into the gym and lost weight before. How can we stick here at this level? Because this, you do do this every few years. Yeah, the, so let's see you again. Yeah, you too. Please don't make go down the road. I mean, down the path again. Ah, I don't know. I think not being complacent in my day-to-day life. Well, you work far too.

You work the morning. Yeah, so my- I'm 45 A.M. If no one knows my schedule, live on the West Coast, but I live on kind of a East Coast schedule of where, our show brought cast on the West Coast, and but it could be heard on the West Coast, but I live on kind of a East Coast schedule of where our show broadcasts on the West Coast, but it could be heard on the East Coast if that makes any sense. So I have to get up at 1.50 a.m. every day and then we broadcast from at starting at 3.00

a.m. because at 6.00 a.m. on the East Coast for all the morning radio out there and then we kind of just go for seven hours straight. And it keeps on dropping off. Crazy. As you come back to the West Coast. So it's crazy. So when do you have time to like, yeah, and then you work late? Yeah.

So I have to be in bed every day by 8 p.m. And you do that, you're like lights off, shut down. Lights off, you gotta be super strict about it. But what I was doing before is not caring about what I ate and it would just be a cycle where I'd be exhausted and just every day that would be my schedule. You came up in light right now. I know, right?

I like that I'm just a little bit more concerned. I remember all the times I would come in and I could barely keep my eyes open. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, well I like this healthy menace. So I know some people are listening, and they might have been in the position that I was in before, and I, it sucks.

Going to the gym, it sucks. I'm telling you, it never gets better. I'm not gonna lie to you and go, oh, I feel so much better. I feel great going in the gym. Those are lies, but There was there's this guy who works with Conan his name's Andy Richter, right? And I would see Andy Richter on my way to the gym and

He kind of just said something to me while we were in the elevator and he goes just got to do it Just got to go just got to do it. That's what you gotta do. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it.

So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it.

So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. So you gotta hurry up and do it. I crave I enjoy it, but it's not for everybody. Some people never ever get there. Yeah, I don't think on that person But I just say I gotta do it. That's it. Well, that's and it will

Make your life a lot better. Yeah, well, I can see it in your eyes. I can see it in the way you're moving and talking Yeah, that's great because we want you around for a long time. Thank you. Yes. So what have you learned about sex? Since I've been gone. Oh my god so many things that I was gonna ask you that But I was gonna say, so since the, what were you calling it, the eye watch earlier? It's actually the Apple watch. But I wanna know what you think about this, that Apple's Siri routinely recorded you having sex.

Have you heard this? Starting that came at this discovery. I have. I was trying to, I was trying to repast just the headlines about it. I go, was it, I don't know, accidentally activated? No, yeah. It is constantly listening.

There's consultants who go in, they hire Apple Hired Consultant to leak this story, which is like far those for the consultants. But they leak these stories that they said, even the sound of a zip, Siri, here's a zipper as a trigger. And then she starts recording, everything that you're saying. So private discussions between doctors and patients,

business deals, sexual encounters, and so on. I hate to break it, everybody, but it's not just Siri. It's a collection. It's a collection. If you read the fine print in every single app that you download and it says access to your microphone, they're doing that. They're listening to everything you're saying.

Why do you think some of the apps I have ads? That's chills and scared. And I want to tell you something. I have ads that pop up that you haven't even searched on your phone. Like why you, why suddenly you're talking about going to the Bahamas and then there's an app for a cruise for the Bahamas on your phone. It's because they're listening to everything. They're listening for triggers.

What are you saying? I'm not a big brother like crazy conspiracy guy. I live my life where I'm not going to do anything that's going to put me in jail so I don't really care what they're listening to. Listening to and I go, oh wait, you're going to show me an ad of something that I'm interested in. I don't really care, you know, and I know some people are super paranoid about that. But that's just how I am. I did just happen. I was googling a flight for something, and then all of a sudden it came into my Google

that I was googling on my computer, on my phone. I got something. Well, because that has to do with your web browser, because your web browser's recording is in your saying. All that stuff. But you think people are really okay. So that's just funny. When it comes to what it comes to sex and online,

there's the biggest scam that's making people afraid and they're getting blackmailed a lot of time. There's a lot of emails that are coming up where you'll get emailed go and it says, I know everything you've watched regarding porn, your camera has been recording you, and we can see what you've been masturbating to, and if you don't send this amount of money,

we're gonna read. Oh, that happens all the time. And some people get afraid, and they think that's actually happened. They go, we've recorded you, we're gonna release these videos to your contact list. If you don't send us a certain amount of money, you haven't heard about this? No, have you guys, I haven't heard about this. Yeah, cause I send us a certain amount of money. You haven't heard about this?

No, have you guys, I haven't heard about this. Yeah, it's happened to people that I've known. Do they send them money? No, they don't send them money. I hope not. Don't ever send money to anyone that I know. Yeah, don't send anybody. Oh, you remember the things we used to talk about is there was the,

just like- How many sex over the internet thing that I've talked about years ago? The whole thing, everything you predicted has happened that we talked about is being able to have sex with the toys that can communicate and not in a virtual reality. I know, remember people used to laugh at me, I go, dude, there's gonna be one thing,

there's gonna be a thing where you can have sex through your laptop and then on the other side of the country, your partner's gonna have a toy and they're gonna be feeling what you're having sex with. Yeah, and that's that happened, that's that happened me. It's really I know a lot Well, that's a thing and thinking about what's changed over the last 14 years I don't think we started we didn't have social media. We did of my space Which I never did and then I remember one day I'll never forget this was like 2008

You're like dude you got to sign up for this thing called Twitter. Yeah, I was like you like pull I was in a meet you're like you have to get on Twitter. I'm like, okay Yeah, but there that was 2009 2008 and now it sucks because there's so many things You know being based in San Francisco. We saw exploding and I go why don't we spend extra five minutes and try to monetize that Part of that more. Yeah, We love doing what we're doing. I know. I remember going in the Twitter office and it was a little bit bigger than the room that we're in now.

Exactly. Just a little bit of a man that was great. You know what? I could have swept the floors for you or whatever. I know. It's okay. We're doing well now. We're doing well.

We're doing well. Yeah. Did you still love doing radio? Absolutely. Yeah. It's super fun. That's good. I'm not complaining. That's good. You seem like you're good. I would like to do it from a yacht, but.

Could you do that? Could you get a ticket? I'm not. Yeah, I could, but I wanted it to be a yacht that I own. You know what I'm saying? Are you investing your money? Did you buy a place? No, almost a lot of place in Las Vegas.

Do you love it that much? I do. Okay. I do. I just don't do like all the cheesy go-to club every single night and Sleep until four in the afternoon the next day. I just go to I go to shows check out nice restaurant. It has nice shopping It can't be the cost of living there. I just kind of just want to as a second home. That's all I'm not gonna I'm not gonna move there and be based out there, but I Don't want to pay for the hotel rooms anymore, you know, we have to doesn't your company pay for it a lot

Yeah, we had the shout out to the I heart radio festival coming up September no September 20th 20th in 21st Go to the I heart radio festival All right guys, we're gonna take a quick break and we come back. We're gonna get into your questions. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ So what about this? The most annoying parts of sex that no one talks about. Talking after?

Just talking in it all. Exactly. Yeah. I love that part of it. What? That's my favorite part. I know, you will talk to somebody to death. I love that part of it. What? That's my favorite part. I know, you will talk to somebody to death. I know, I love it.

Getting a pubic hair caught in your throat. Okay, I haven't had that happen. Okay, when the ejaculate seeps out afterwards, that doesn't happen to me either. Oh, guys afterwards? Well, if you ejaculate into a woman. Yeah. Or, yeah, I guess a woman.

What are you just like cleaning up afterwards in general? Well, you can't even get up and go to the bathroom and then there's like stuff dripping down your leg, you know. Yeah, the overall cleanup. This is the right thing. The overall cleanup. That can't be annoying too. Hip cramps.

Yes. Do you get cramps? Uh, not recently, but I have. And you try to fight through it too. Yeah, but sometimes you got to stop because the pain is just overwhelming. Right, exactly. Sleeping over afterwards, not as comfortable.

People are just, people are sort of setting their ways now. I mean, you're in your relationship, but some people just don't want to sit over. That's my favorite part, is the cuddling. Yeah, I don't, not my favorite part. I don't think I'm running a situation where I'm like, oh, you need to leave now. No, no, no, no.

Stay if you want to stay. You're like, I'm out. I don't care. I've already passed out. Yeah. The suction cup sound when things get really sweaty. Yes. Do you think that's annoying?

I don't think it's annoying. I don't think all this stuff is annoying. Yeah. Okay, so we can. Maybe I'm just not that mean. I know. Maybe you've got nicer. I don't know. Maybe. Okay, so we got it. Maybe I'm just not that mean. I know, maybe you've gotten nicer. I don't know. Okay, what else do we got here?

When the pressure feels so good and you feel like you're gonna pee, that happens for women. All right. Let me tell you this guys, here's a tip. If you guys are gonna pee, well they don't, right? Yeah.

Because some guys would. Some guys in the past would. I'm seeing my eyes, I think you've been sure. That stuff you don't guys would some guys in the past one Seema's I think you matured used that stuff you used to think would bother you know, what it I? I'm trying to think you're like a man. I know if You listen to me over the past I don't know many years I've always said that most of these hangups that women talk about that they're afraid of that what a guy would think guys don't care Guys are straight dogs man They are right. What if you let's give them a treat and they're happy. You really don't care. You don't care about it

Like no don't care like we're not looking at your Yeah, your body in the way that we think you are not at all So we just we're just happy that like guys are just happy that you're there and you're having sex with them. Yeah, they're so happy. And they think there is some dicks out there who want you to leave immediately. But that's not all the guys. No, and I found some of these men who were like,

oh yeah, she has to look perfect and do all these things. But like I'm just like, that's not your purpose of them. There's some like psychos, honestly. How about sleeping in the wet spot? Sleeping in the webs? Do I want to? No, why isn't there something that we had that like seeps up the wet spot that you put powder on it?

Or there's some kind of spray or there is? Yes. We can give you. Are you ready to go into the sex closet yet? It takes time. No, I'm afraid you have the door shut. I don't even know what you have in there nowadays. It's amazing.

Did you ever use it? Oh, do you know what's hilarious? I was talking to somebody to be nameless, but it was a gay guy that we were around and you gave him a fleshlight. Okay. You probably don't remember. I barely even remember this.

I know that you had a bag of toys one day when we were hanging out. And he's like, you don't understand how great the fleshlight is. It's the best. I use it with my partner. I'm so glad. Yeah, and I always thought like a fleshlight thing was kind of a heterosexual thing.

No. I never thought if you have a penis. I get it. I understand. But I think, I don't know. I always thought like a heterosexual guys are the ones that are going out and buying all these things because understand. But I think, I don't know, I always thought like of heterosexual guys or the ones that are going out and buying all these things because gay guys that I know,

they have no problem of just finding other gay guys that have sex with. But it's about variety. Yeah. So it's something different, because it's like masturbation, the thing with a flashlight is you use your hand. Or something a little bit different.

I was always trying to talk you into trying that. You wouldn't try it. Yeah. I get it. But he swears by it. I could bring him more. Yeah. I get it. But he swears by it. I could bring him more. Yeah. I could give you more for your friends.

There's something called the hot octopus now, which is a, what? He put it around your penis. It's like a little cozy for your penis kind of, and it has a little vibrator inside it, it's around your friendy limb. Do you remember where the friendy limb is? The friendy limb. Do you remember the friendy limb? No, I don't.

Have you learned stuff? You've learned. The underside of the penis. So here's your penis. And there's a tip to your penis. We need our penis prosthetic penis to be here, not like a real penis. But on the underside of the penis,

so it's cut. This part, where the shaft meets the tip, right there, that is the magic spot. So it has a little oscillation and it goes around and it kind of cozyes up to your penis and then it does a little tear around and it makes it feel good. And it has a lot of things and stuff. So you could take one of those. How long do you last have you had races? No, it depends on you are, but maybe you do have one. Not very long. We

should just leave these on the table. Okay, wait, so here's your boy. Oh, look, thanks, Jane. There's goodness. Here's the Frenelum. Okay. Yeah, I have one of those. So this is like, you two. So we're looking. So is this a circumcised penis? You think?

No, this is circumcised penis. Yeah. Okay. Circumcised penis. Shaft meets the head. Yeah. The shaft meets the head. I feel like I'm in sex ed right now.

You should. Have you seen the movie sex head on Netflix? Yes. Yes. It was great. Yeah. It was really good. So there you go.

Right there. Wow. That is the magic spot. So if you're with a penis owner, as we say now, and you're licking it or touching it, do you know we have to all the things? Yeah. So we are licking it around it. That's just the spot that that is a happy spot.

So this toy. Yes. I like this. Have we had this for Jamie? We've had this is the one that was in the dome. Yeah, that's the light up penis that spins around and lights up. Wow, on display. Yeah, it's like you know how you used to get those like glass things. Yeah. Where that like if you put the light on and it was like in the middle of the glass it was like a wool fur giraffe or something. It's like but it's just you put the penis on top. Nice. Yeah, dude.

Check that shit. So that's amazing. I just want to hear all the time. I just feel like I'm always doing a lot of gesticulating and I can just show it now. What else do we got? Oh, I want to ask you. So how fun is it though?

I mean, I know we love doing podcasts, but being on serious, except radio, it must be so fun to talk to people, because initially that's what our, you and I first started was on radio, so we can get people to call in. And there are no dub buttons. Yeah.

No dub, I know, that's amazing. And people call in, our lines are pretty full every night. And we have people calling in from all over America, all over this America, asking questions and the thing that I love about it, Manus, is that it's really like changing lives. Like on the podcast, we know that people are emailing in with questions and it's great on how to build that way. But now getting to talk to people and helping them through all wherever it is in five minutes or less and helping them even just figure out the next step for wherever they're stuck,

sexually, romantically dating dating all this stuff. It's pretty, um, that's what I know and love about you too, is that you love talking to people. You're not like a shut in where I don't want this person to talk to me. You definitely will talk to anybody that will come by and immediately ask them about their sex life.

I immediately will tell me and sometimes, there have been times I'm like, can we knock it into what I do? I don't remember, I was in it. I was somewhere, I'm like, so tell me about your work and what you're doing. I literally had to turn around and be like, I can't talk about work right now.

But mostly I love it. I love doing the show, I love doing radio. What is it though about radio, you think, minus why do we love it? Because also I remember, as you might remember this, that my dad, who died when I was young, he loved radio too.

He was a DJ and then he went on to be a lawyer, but I know he always loved radio. And I love it just because of the immediacy of it and you're so, I don't know, you're in the adrenaline and you have to be so focused, but what is it that you love that radio? I think maybe because I started from film and television and it was such, I mean, not that radio

is not a collaborative effort. It is. But it's more of your ideas, you can just do them. You know, when I, when I went to film school, I always had a compromise. And I do work on a show of, there's 10 people, but there's very little compromise on ideas. And I hate when somebody has an idea and it gets shut down. And I don't think you get too much. It's like when you do radio, you do that idea and you see if it works.

And if it doesn't work, you'll know right away. You just let it go. How do you know? Yeah, we should talk about that. I don't know. Well, we have a texting system for our show that people text in in real time, and they'll tell me if something's working or not.

Who is it though, like listeners? Yeah, just listeners. Yeah, they, from all across the country. Yeah, they're like this sucks, man, it's stuck to in the second right now. It'll be in the middle of the segment that are like, this is terrible, move on. But why do you know, like, got it?

But you gotta, you kinda have to trust your gut and breathe like, like, like, like, you can feel it in the moment it's going. Yeah, if it's good or not. Right. And some things I push through and I'm like, oh man, afterwards, it'll ruin my day sometimes. Yeah, I know, but I'm saying.

Yeah, not for what the people say because, you know, you gotta have a thick skin. People will destroy you over nothing. It's social media, which I feel bad because I, I actually, I was talking to a younger radio person just recently and he goes, how do you deal with it? Because he's afraid to progress even more to try more because he's afraid of what people think. And those people that'll hit him up on social media and say, oh, you're terrible or things like that. And finally, I've got a thick skin,

but I hate disappointing myself. You know, I have an idea and I execute it and it didn't go well. I'm disappointing myself. I don't care what other people say. No, that's how I am too. I feel like when I can feel it, like I didn't execute it well,

or I wish I was more prepared for it, or just didn't go well. Like I'm like, yeah, it, it's about that, pardon ourselves. It sucks. But I want to go back to your dating life real quick, because people are interested in that. So you're off the apps, which I kind of support because, man, again, talking to my friends and the messages that they share,

it just out of this world, How do you find somebody legit? I feel like I've been, and I, and I like through friends kind of things. To friends, through friends, through going out, I meet people when I'm out, when I go out. Yeah, I just got fixed up or I'll meet people. I'm just writing, I feel like the thing about dating and this is what I always tell people,

it's actually true when you are ready to date. You have to let people know that you're single, like let your friends know, like I had a few people fix me up. I was out with a friend last night, she's like, oh, I'm gonna come single and you can totally fix me up. She's like, let me think about it.

So now I know in the moment she didn't have anyone, but I'm sure if something comes up, so think about it. We don't think to tell people that maybe because we feel like it seems desperate or we don't want to bother you but people love finding love people. They're like, how great if I could.

So then you plant the seed. It's like when you're looking for a job, you let everyone know that you're single. And I think I think I do those the same thing. So I also, I mean, it's just starting now. I feel like I meet you. But I also am much more the thing. I've gotten a lot better at menace is tell you is I know more what I want and what I don't want and what I will tolerate and what I will not.

And so I feel like in a sense, I know myself so well that I can just kind of, I can just have a few, and I don't mind talking to someone before he on the day. I think it's really important. I don't wanna get ready and drive costs down and do my makeup and get ready and show up and be like this date is not it.

So I can already tell there's no chemistry. So I will like face time before the date, or I will talk about the date. And tell you what I'm gonna be like, oh, that's gonna kill it, that's gonna, no, I save time, be efficient. I'm like, this is what I want, this is what I'm going. And I think in my 20s, I was like,

I have all the time in the world to date people who suck or whatever, like you used to make fun of me. Like, who the hell are you dating? Like you used to make some of the guys you're like, really that guy? Remember I crashed like guys car that one time and you were in it. Yeah, that was pretty bad. But what happened?

I'm trying to arrive back into a pole. He was a jerk. We talked about this numerous times over the years, not wasting time. Like shoot your shot. If you like somebody, shoot your shot, see what happens. Again, you said this probably a billion times on the show. You're not going to die if they say no. Nothing physically is going to happen to you.

You'll be disappointed to be sad, but at least you haven't wasted any time. You know, you can go on and meet the next person. We do the thing on the Woody show where it's called, so there's the Baselrett, which people love. Yes, no, I'm into it. I watch it for the first season. I haven't watched one second of it.

Okay. So we- Ever in your life. Ever in my life. I just started- But we do the segment and it's called A-bashlerette. So we interview women on the street and talk about some of the dates that they've been on.

Okay. And I'm gonna tell you right now that if you're a guy who thinks that they can't get a date, you should hear some of these stories on these dates that they've gone on with these guys. And if these guys can get a date, I'm telling you right now, you can too. So what an example just recently, one that we played.

This woman was like, oh yeah, I was on a date with this guy and he got a call and it was from this woman that he used to date and she was in labor because she was having his baby. So he didn't have a car. So I, we left a date and I drove him to the hospital. Stop. Yeah, I drove him to the hospital and I sat there with him.

I actually even went into the labor room and brought him coffee because he was tired. He didn't even know that she was having his, or did she know he was having his, okay. But he knew. But this is like, yeah, this is a first date. And this guy is getting women to drive him to the hospital.

Crazy. And then they're like, oh, did you continue to date? Yeah, we want a couple more dates. Oh my God. So if you're listening to this podcast, you're like, I can't get a date I'm telling you the guy who has no job no car Who's having a baby with somebody else is having a woman drive him to the hospital. I'm telling you can get a date

You can't be shy. You can't be shy and I used to be the shyest person ever But now I just don't give a crap I know that's true too when you're younger self like what would you tell your younger self? You say, just go do it. Just do it. Yeah. Just ask them out. Find out if they like you or not. And now, we know I think we're in two minutes. Where I think that women are asking about women are asking out. That's something I've always said on the show too. Yeah, just do it. Just do it. Women do. I think you used to be anti that. But I think you're on board now. I evolved. But I think I used to be

more like, Oh, I think that meant that men, that, but I think you're on board now. I evolved, but I think I used to be more like, oh, I think they met, let men, they need to do the chasing. I believe in evolutionary biology that this man wanted chasing, hunting gather. And I think that now we're all more equal that we, I think, yes. We always talk about how men can't read signs. Men, again, we're dogs, we're dumb. I'm sorry. And if you're a man, you're listening to this and you're offended by that, you know it's

true. We can't I think some men are more emotionally available right emotionally more mature But I think it typically was a study that came out years ago that said that men just typically can't read some of the signs Yeah, I Know idea if you like me or not. I you're nice. Maybe you're just being nice to me, right? I don't know if you're actually into me or not. Right. I think so.

I think. And then so just make it apparent to a guy. If you feel that you're letting a guy know that you're into them and the guy has not taken any action on it, then maybe they're not picking up on those signs. Just tell him, hey, would you want to go out? Yeah, just say like that. Exactly. they're not picking up on those signs. It just told him, hey, would you want to go out? Why not? Yeah, just say like that. Exactly.

I think it is a different world right now. And I think that every, there are more single people out there than ever before. And so to think that you can't find anybody, I think is ridiculous. To think that you live in the worst place ever to date and everyone thinks that wherever they live sucks. So try it, go out, ask, put yourself out there,

be vulnerable. That's all great menace. I know. Don't be afraid. Don't be afraid. Don't be afraid. I'm just trying to think of what changed. There were dating apps. And the study came out last week that's a show that like people are meeting online now more than anywhere else. So it's not that I don't like and I do have the apps. No, that's not. I just don't enjoy them getting back to people the texting. I already was suck at texting. Yeah. I have. I have people in my life who got married off a Craigslist, you know? Yeah, exactly.

I'm not poo pooing the dating online thing. I'm just saying that I, as a woman, I don't know how you deal with it because the guy, the guys out there, it's just crazy. Yeah, because you're hearing, well, those stories that I was enlightening about the woman who's like, yeah, but we will put up for so much, but I think it's just crazy. I know, because you're hearing, well, those stories that I was enlightening about the woman who's like, yeah, but we will put up for so much,

but I think that men do too. But there's always diamonds and the roughs. There are, but do you think it's really different in your mind? It's because we both have the Stanford Disco and the LA experience. Yes. You do think it's different.

Absolutely. How so? Dating wise or just life wise? I think in your, probably part of the problem is the distance thing. So when you live in a concentrated city like San Francisco, Chicago, New York city, it's easy to get around. And here, there's a weird thing too about there's the valley and then people in West Hollywood

don't like the valley. And the funny thing and they won't don't like the valley. Right. And the funny thing, and they won't go over to the valley. I absolutely love the valley. And the thing is, which I find hilarious, is the people, let's pick on West Hollywood for a second. Okay. People in West Hollywood think they think they're above people that live in the valley. And it's funny because then I'll go visit them

as a guy who does live in the valley and say, wait a minute, you pay how much for this shitty apartment? And I, you live and people where I'm from living a way nicer place, but yet you're think, I'm better than you, you're better than me. But is there a better seat this way? No, there's this weird thing, but it's, again,

let me get back to, I'll get to my point. I don't think I'm better than I am. I understand. But there is like this weird thing where. I don't drive anywhere. I go, my whole life is 1.2 miles. That's the point that I'm about to make, is that people won't date outside of a certain

just that. Oh, that I can't do because I'm not driving unless they drive to me all the time. I'm not going to drive. Yeah. So you limit. It's limiting. Yeah, you limit the circle. So I think that's what's much different about dating and different city. It's a very small town. Yeah. And you could do it anywhere, although now it's traffic and all that is like, remember there wasn't traffic on your own. Oh, it's horrible. It's just as bad. You're never gonna go back though.

Uh, eventually, yeah, I will. I think so. You're gonna like babies and stuff? No, no, no. I have my friends for dogs. I'm good. You're not gonna have kids. No, I'm good.

Yeah, that's good. I get it. Same. I hate it. And it sucks, I hate to say this, but I would say, I don't know, out of the 100% of people that I know that have kids. And it sucks, I hate to say this, but I would say, I don't know, out of the 100% of people that I know that have kids.

Oh, tell me. 90% of them just tell me how miserable they are all the time. Because of the kids? Yeah, they just vet. But there is that small percentage who just absolutely love it. I mean, they love their kids, but life is harder, and here's the other thing. It is no secret that when you have children, it does take a huge toll on your sex life

Yeah, and anybody that's not sitting that don't be surprised Yeah, and anybody that's just saying that has kids. I'm you know, I Feel for you because I hear these stories from my friends on stuff that they have to deal with and it's horrible and You guys off the air were talking talking about the TV show Euphoria. And I think, the Euphoria is like almost true. I know some of it's like hyperbolic, but it's kind of, it's kind of true to life, I think in urban,

just urban life, like drug use with young people and stuff like that. And I couldn't imagine going through that. I know we definitely have friends and family have gone through drug issues, but having a child that you raised who was this innocent little kid who has to go through something like that. I don't know if that's something that I could deal with. I still have it. I know it is rough and I sell my own things to deal with

and managing my own life. It is a harder time to grow up. Now it's funny, we were talking about this because millennials get all this slack right now. Are we slack? Is that the way we get all this crap to millennials? Because they're just whatever people say about millennials that they're only connected to their phones

or they're lazy, or whatever. But we were saying it, and I don't think that, I mean, obviously I have wonderful millennials who work around me, but Jay was saying that Gen X, our generation, we don't get much. We're kind of the generation that, baby boomers were above us,

they had a bunch of, but we're Gen X, right, you're not a millennial. No, thank God, right. We barely missed it, yeah. But we, what is our thing? We grew up, it was still more innocent. Absolutely, I think. I don't think that we had as much, I mean, there were like, drugs, maybe I never saw drugs

until I was like, just sex. Well, Andy will definitely just have way more access to all the stuff. When I, when I want to watch porn, I had to look at a scrambled signal and I would see a boob. Right. Exactly. Like here, every kid, when you go to a restaurant, they have a tablet, you know, and they could pull up horn if they wanted to. And you're like an apple bee and you're little kids, you're looking at what they're eating. They can see everything they want to see.

I know. They can get whatever they want. But yeah, exactly. So Euphoria on HBO has been, yeah, it's really, it's, it's, it's harrowing. It really is. And it's kind of, I's it's it's harrowing it really is and it's kind of I'm obsessed with it I watch every single episode yeah I am I'm almost there watch it if you haven't watched it people what else have you you said you watch sex education sex education of course I'm always I'm still into all the reality shows they've done I don't watch the bathroom. I love the interprompers and all the bravo shows. Do you still watch all the bravo?

Menace and I were on a bravo show. Yeah. Two more to the quick second. Yeah. We were. We had one season, 2012. It's called Misadized. Out of all my friends, they met everybody in my life.

They only liked menace to be on. Oh, thank you. Yeah, do you remember that? Yeah. Dude, that was hell. But it was a good show. It was a good show. It was fun.

Should we do one of the answers to some emails like old times in front of us? Yes, please. It was a good time. It was fun. Should we do you want to answer some emails like old times? Yes, please. We love emails. Yeah. Alright guys, we're going to answer your questions. It's what we, why I love doing this. If I love answering emails, if you want to answer an email, you cannot email me feedback at sex. The mme.com or go to the Ask Emily tab on the section of Emily Sipa, no matter how you do, it includes your name, your age, where you live and how you listen to the show. Yes. Ready.

Do it. Alright. This is from Jordan, he's 20 in Maryland. Hi, Emily. I'm transferring to an art of state college this fall. I've had a summer. Sweet. Right?

Yeah. I've had a summer fling with my prom date. Yeah. From high school, that is now turned into a relationship. I'm a pretty loyal man, pretty loyal, but I'm concerned about the stereotype slash temptation around sex in college. Any tips on this would help also how to handle being the more experienced partner since I'm my new girlfriend's first.

Let me tell you this, Jordan. And we've always actually differed on this subject. Oh, have we? Well, I'm going to say, I don't even know that we were like an old couple. Like, I don't know. Do we disagree the fact that you should not bring your Don't bring Santa the beach. Don't bring your egg your your love from high school to college. Do not do it Don't you are twenty years old?

I Think that your prom date from high school. No go to college. You will have sexual temptation in college You already had a summer fling that turns into something at your age You're very susceptible to finding people that you're gonna be attracted to and believe me the second you step foot in campus There's gonna be a whole lot more and I just think that in college that you can get distracted if you're always talking to people back at home And you're texting and emailing face timing You will not be able to be fully present with your college experience and that includes meeting new people What do you think, Linus?

See, this is where we differ. Okay. I mean, if you were in relationship, I would say, go ahead and, you know, try it, try to continue the relationship if you want to. That's what I'm gonna say. Because if you're in a college, if you get to college,

I'm gonna give you a story in a second. But when you get to college and you're just gonna do it, just to do it, then what does it matter? You're just like, oh, because I just wanna get my numbers up because I'm in college and I'm just gonna hook up with all these chicks just because I want to and to have the real college experience. I say, if you really, really like the person and you think you can continue the relationship, go ahead

and try it. I'm going to tell you right now, I was in a relationship just out of high school. My partner, she went off to a different school. We tried to continue relationship. Two weeks later, I got a call and say, what do you think we're going to be at? I go, I don't know, hopefully together. Well, yeah, I don't think it's going to, it's going to work out. Right? So fast forward, maybe a year and a half later, she was, she couldn't continue school. She had to move back home and try to call me and that continued relationship. I didn't want to continue it.

So that's what happened to me. I'm not saying what I'm saying is don't automatically do the stereotypical thing. Well, I'm off to college. I need to automatically end my relationship. Okay, but let's just think about this. Let's talk about Jordan though. I think that's so clever. He had a fling, and it's his first.

So now he wants to know how he's more experienced and now he's got a teacher out of sex and he's not even going to be there. He's moving out of town. He's going to an out of state college. He's going to be in another state. I get it, that's what I just said. That's the thing, that's the textbook thing

that everyone's going to tell you to do. Automatically break up. They Be earlier together. They had a flame. I cap a left. Flink. Wait, hold on. Read that email because he said I'm in a Russian summer fling with my prom date. That's turned into a relationship. It's summer, dude. It's summer. You're glossing over the part that it turned into a relationship. You're in a relationship. I'm Dr. sex doctor. I'm done. I understand. I appreciate it.

Okay, do the textbook thing Doctor. I'm done. I understand. I appreciate it. Okay. Do the textful thing then just break up the textbook thing I'm a done. I'm a man. I understand madness I'm right. I understand you're right. I understand you're right But I'm just saying like least if your relationship leaves Try to continue Christmas or something for the break I mean, I dated my husband a little from this. I can, I told you we differ, but we're done different, and now I'm stating what you do. Oh, okay.

Jordan, appreciate your input. Yeah, Jordan, I don't mean to like put two different answers in your head. Okay, you can listen to menace. No, no, okay, maybe I can reword it. Okay, try. Okay. Do you no no wait, okay, maybe I can reword it. Okay, try okay Do you really really really like this person? Is this something that you really want to be with? That's what you should ask yourself and then you can make it

Don't see her when you get on temptation Island in your campus and there's all these new women walking around you want to hook up with I get I understand I get it. Yeah, I can teach her things things and you're 20 I just think I just don't want you because I was a freshman in college. No, I'm not holding on. I had a freshman I was okay. I let you my see me. Let me answer nope my see I want to answer you though No, maybe because I have another no I have another thing that I want to say because I don't I don't want I Don't want, I don't want, no. I'm just saying I don't want Jordan to be like my ex-girlfriend where he comes back

a year and a half and he wants to be with that girl. It's work at heart, he's transferring, which means he's taking his life seriously. I get it. Even the con he's leaving, that's hard. He's got the family shoulders. But look, okay, let's say he gets out of college and he goes, you know what?

I ran through all these girls and it didn't fulfill my life and I want to be with The girl I told him that bridge and we come to it, but right now why is that necessary? Why not try to continue? Why? Okay, here's my story. You don't want to hear it when I was a senior in college high school. I believe in true love That's why you're here. I believe in true love. I believe in true love. That's why you're over here. I believe in true love. I believe in true love. My high school boyfriend I He's amazing. He's great guy, but we were together senior then I went to a different college And he did and I spent all the freshman year driving back and forth at his college and my college

I'm I get it. I'm not driving We talked about this It was like I should have been present in my college meeting new people, but I was like, oh my boyfriend blah blah blah. Guess what, it didn't work. In fact, none of your relationships, there's many relationships under the age of 30, are not going to work. So that's the other thing.

Wait until you're 30, at least they get married, Jordan. So go to college and have fun. That's like you married. Dude, we're moving on. Okay. But Jordan, you know that I'm right. Okay. Okay. Godspeed God speed Jordan ready. Okay. I Love this penis. It gives me power. Yeah

This is from we're back. I know you can't see it because it's a podcast But she's swinging a penis at me in anger as we're talking. Yeah, it's a hard pizza. Yeah It's a man taking an aisle with that. Okay, this is from back at 26 in Ohio. Okay, Emily, I love listening to you while I'm at work. It's a great show and it helps me a lot. I build my person for about four months now. He's sexually inexperienced and I've had quite a few sex partners. Every time I mention something such as hustler or anything sexually related, he makes a comment.

I'm sure you've been there a million times or I'm sure you've done this before with someone else. Even if I have that none of his business and also makes me feel bad about myself, it's like he sees me as a fluzie or something. So it's the kind of slut-chaminger. Is there any way I can get him to stop saying those things or do you have any idea of why this would be? Thank you so much. Rebecca. Okay, Rebecca, here's the thing. You've been with him for four months.

He's an experienced listen. When somebody feels that they are less experienced than you are, whether it's the man or the woman, they're gonna feel threatened. And how it's coming up is his insecurities, like, oh, you've probably done this before. You probably know all of this because he's super insecure about it.

So I think the more you can not even pay attention to his comments, like, because he's not meaning to hurt you and he's not trying to treat you like a fluency. What he actually is saying is like, I feel really insecure right now. I don't have this experience. So I think what you can do is it sounds like what he needs for you is some reiteration

and some confirmation that he's doing fine as he is and the things that you really love about your sex life. Because you're not saying that, you're saying he's actually an experience, but you're not that, you're saying he's actually an experience, but you're not emailing me saying, he's actually an experience. How do I teach him what to do? You seem like you're probably pretty satisfied

in your relationship. Your question is, how do I get him to stop feeling so bad? So I think you really just have to affirm what you like about it and say, you know what, I'm not really concerned with my past right now. Oh yeah, I'm really focused on the sex we're having right now. Yeah, the second you threatened, you threatened that,

I don't say, oh, I'm not gonna have sex with you anymore, but the second you started getting that in his head, oh, wait a minute, she's upset with me, he's gonna wanna stop that right away. You know, that's gonna cut off the good time that you guys are having together. Exactly. Again, we've always talked about this.

And you always have the tagline, communication is a lubrication. I still have it. Yeah. Be direct. It goes back to not wasting time. It's something that bothers you. Yeah.

Tell them, and if he continues with it, then you have to think, do I want to continue this? Yeah, that is true. I mean, you could, I still think that you could just Reinforce what he needs to make it feel like he's a really good lover But if you keep saying these things instead of saying why do you say that it makes you feel bad? You could say you could say when you say those things to me it makes me feel like you're you have a judgment around my sexual past But I'm what I'm reading through the lines here is is that he's just insecure,

which in a sense. So I think you could either just address his comments and or just focus on what you love about your sex life together. And that's going to bring up his confidence because maybe he's just not feeling it because it's hard to be as someone who's more experienced. Have you been with someone more experienced before? Yeah, but I'm not being a bitch like this dude. Well, right, he's a... I say that in a nice way. I know you do, a nice, it's why. This is from Marissa, she's in New York,

just one year. Family, I love your show. I love your city, by the way Marissa. I love New York. My boyfriend, I have a very healthy sex life. This is why I miss you, man. And she's like, they have the best burgers and this stuff.

Yeah, they do, oh yeah. I'm here, there's a show, I'm just gonna love a food. Oh, New York, what's up to black tap, love black tap. They finally have a black tap on the West Coast. Yes, love it. Okay, hi Emily, I love your show. My boyfriend and I have a very healthy sex life

and great intimacy. We talk about fantasies and we're very vocal about things you wanna try. We fantasize about threesomes, dirty talking bed or sex thing, and in order to be on the same page, we've started picturing a mutual friend of ours. However, I've already tried to threesome once years ago with my ex and it was with that same friend. My boyfriend has never tried to threesome and I never told him about it for two reasons. One, it was with our mutual friend

and I didn't feel like disclosing a sexual experience of hers when we agreed never to tell anyone. Number two, it was such a blip on the radar, a drunk experience of my ex when we weren't happy, our sex life was nothing compared to what I had with my current partner. I don't want to tell my've had this experience, but the more we talk about fantasies, I feel like I'm lying, and would hate for him to feel like I kept something from him.

And aside, I'm not sure what ever actually go through with the threesome, or is it simply a bedroom fantasy? What do I do? So I- Don't tell them, please. Never, ever, take that to the grave. Also, she brings up a good point.

Sorry to cut you off, and that's her right away. Yeah, I don't know. This is the sex with them in podcasts. I'll sit back. Can I just say it real quick though? Oh, jeez, just cut. No, I'm just saying like, from a guy's perspective, yeah, don't tell him. It's unnecessary.

And she brought up a good point where it was with somebody else that you greed that you would not tell anybody. And that's not cool. Right, yeah, okay, so let me say this. I don't think, first when I was reading this, I thought that you were saying, should I tell my boyfriend that it was with this friend?

But you've never even told your boyfriend that you've had a threesome. Now, if it was one threesome years ago, I don't think you have to tell him. I don't think you have to tell him about a threesome. I don't, especially because he's going to say with who and then you're going to be lying about the friend. So I don't think that. However, I think that if you actually do want to have a threesome with him, I think go ahead and do it and just don't have it with this friend, obviously. There's many people that have a threesome with, I mean, you're in goddamn New York City, plus all these apps, there's all these places to find a third person.

Yeah, what's the app? I had a cohort. Field, F-E-E-L-D, and then there's Cassidy, and then there's Fett Life. There's a bunch of them. We have a thing in our site. I think it was Fett Life, she was talking about. Go to sex.com. We've got a lot of posts on the site. I think it's a bunch of them. We have a thing in our site. I think it was fat life she was talking about. Go to sex.com. We've got a lot of posts on the site.

I think it's kind of fine to third. So check that blog out. So I believe, okay, here's my thing. I also feel this way, like, if you're in a relationship and maybe you kiss someone or maybe you would sex, even sex, but you regret it. And you don't feel like it's an ongoing thing. I don't think you should tell.

So in this case, you've already told me you have an out of three, so it was a drunk in experience. I think've already told me you haven't had a threesome. It was a drunken experience. I think though, if you guys want to have a threesome together, I think that don't obviously bring in this friend, find a new third and create a new experience together because I don't think you have to know about your drunken hook up with an ex because we'll never forget it. And I think that when you do share, sometimes it's too much for our current partners to hear about past sexual issues.

I think also, yeah, yeah, it guys, they act like they're super confident, but it does bug them. And I also want to say, if you're the woman that brings it up, and I think you can find another partner easily. Yeah. If it's a guy trying to coordinate it, it's not as easy. No, you have to be, you both have to be attracted to the woman. And let me say one thing, Marissa, what you are doing well here is that you fantasize about threesomes.

And this is like your step one, I always tell couples before you just jump into a threesome because we're bored or we want to spice it up. Start role playing it, fantasizing about it, talking about it, looking at porn with threesomes, like really thinking what, can we do this because that's the next thing to having it. So walk it through and then of course you discuss boundaries and Once again happen I think going to Vegas having three sim is a bad idea. It's a good idea. Have you done that yet? I support it No, I haven't I don't think you what would you would I? I don't know would you probably But no, I have not done it. No, I wonder if you've opened up at all sexually have I in a three-someway? No, okay in other ways maybe after eight years

Yeah, I wish okay, should we do one more here? See, okay. How about oral oral? I do it. It's been Cali 26 in the USA Hey, Emily, I'm 3.5 years into a relationship with my boyfriend. He actually recently became my fiance He really wants to give me oral sex, and I love that he wants that, but honestly, I find oral boring. It feels fine, but I'd much rather be doing other things. I love giving oral, but receiving doesn't do much for me.

Anyone when I tell this to says that my partner must be not good at it or he must be doing it wrong. I've had five or six sexual partners, and I felt the same way about all of them, even when I'm guiding them through it. Is it possible that it's just not for me or everyone else has right, and I'm just receiving it, not receiving felt the same way about all of them, even when I'm guiding them through it. Is it possible that it's just not for me or everyone else has right and I'm just receiving it, not receiving it the right way?

All right, Cali, let me tell you this about oral. There's two answers here. First, you actually might not love oral. You might be having a lot of pleasure from your partner in other ways. There are some women whose clitters are really sensitive and these are women who tend to be multi-organic

and they can have a lot of orgasms during intercourse. That might be you. However, there is a shot, there is a chance that 26 years old you might not have had oral sex that actually feels right. Emily's a oral pusher, everybody. I am an oral pusher. I love oral sex. She's a dealer. I am. If I could just deal with oral sex every day. Boom, boom, boom. I would fucking do it. Yeah. So dude, I gotta say, Cali, that if you, if he likes doing it to you, maybe the, and I'm just gonna check in here, like, do you have orgasms? Do you pleasure from sex in other ways? So no, like I said, there are small percentage of women who don't just don't love oral because it's too painful, but also for some women, it's also because maybe they had a

bad sexual experience with it. They feel like there's something wrong with their vagina. It looks bad. They're, I think their partner isn't really into it. So if that's you, Cali, that you're like embarrassed or shameful around it, like the only you know that, then I would say, then it's your fiance. I would say, you can let him know that you have some, even some shame around it.

And then his job would be to praise it and tell you to sit back and he's not going anywhere and he wants to go down in you and he's got all night long. What to me, that's the most assuring thing women need to hear. Know that he's into it and tell you to sit back and he's not going anywhere and he wants to go down in you and he's got all night long. But to me, that's the most assuring thing women need to hear. Know that he's into it and he's saying and he loves it and he loves the taste and he wants to be in there and all those things. Yeah, I agree with you. It might just not be, I know you like that, right?

No, I think it might not just be for her or again, she's pretty young. She might not have found a person super experienced it. Yeah, took me a long time until I found that person. Those people's family goals. Now you've been addicted ever since. I love it. Yeah. The world's amazing.

I mean, come on. I mean, also, we only know that 20% of women orgasm during penetration alone. I know, right. How do we fix that? We fix that by doing a lot of oral and using our fingers and becoming very ad depth at other things. All right, Menace.

It's been great seeing you. I love seeing you. This is fast. Can I just say what's up to a couple things real quick? Yeah, do it. All right, so I will be, if you're in Las Vegas, I will be at the Heart Radio Festival look for me on September 20th and 21st. If it's October and you live around Palm Springs,

I'll be at the Marango Casino October 18th. And yeah, just listen to my weekly podcast, not about sex or oral or anything like that. If you wanna know about travel and just pop culture, just search menace on the I Heart Radio app or just go to whatnewpod.com. And if you happen to listen to FM Radio search menace on the iHeart Radio app or just go to whatnewpod.com. And if you happen to listen to FM Radio on the Woody Show

and just search the Woody Show on Alternative Radio stations across the country or just search the Woody Show podcast. Yeah, so pretty, but you're doing great. Congratulations on all of your success. And I love you dearly, like a brother. I miss you and I promise I'll be back more. Yeah, just keep going to the gym and come back. Yeah, yeah. I love you.

You look amazing and I'm really proud of you and congratulations on your own. I'm proud of you. Look at you. Doing radio all the time. It's awesome. Give both of us. I know. I love it. Okay. Thanks, man. Thanks everyone for listening.

All right, guys, I hope you enjoyed the show. Thanks for following us everywhere you're on social. It's out. It's thanks for the Emily and for subscribing to the show, reviewing the show, and letting a friend know. If you found something useful, I'm sure they will too. You can share the episode with them. And thank you to my amazing team, Ken,

Kristen, Michelle, producer, Jamie, and Michael. Was it good for you? Email me, feedback at sexwithamlee.com. at Emily.com.