Sex With Emily - Oral Sex Moves & Grooves with Call Her Daddy

Episode Date: July 20, 2019

On today’s show, Emily is joined by Alex Cooper and Sofia Franklyn from the popular podcast Call Her Daddy & they talk about oral sex tips for all and why we all need to speak up a bit more in the bedroom. Plus, she’s taking your emails.  The three of them go over the “gluck gluck 9000” & “cooch gobbler combo,” – what they are and how to do them. Then, Emily gives advice on how to respect the faith of your overly religious partner and still remain sexual, what to do when you’re finishing too fast (as a woman), and how to stop thinking about your ex and focus on your current partner.  Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep the show FREE: Good Vibrations, Apex, Magic Wand, SiriusXM, Same Day STD Testing.  Follow Emily on all social: @sexwithemily For even more sex talk, tips, & tricks visit sexwithemily.com For more information on Call Her Daddy, click HERE.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you use two hands on a man's penis, he is going to feel like he is the biggest penis in the world. I think a lot of girls assume it's all about the deep throat. It's no. It's really not. But first of all, what if you're not into it? What if you're like, ah, but the smells better taste than we get it all the time? Absolutely. I think that a lot of girls... Why doesn't you join it when you're doing this? This is the thing. I think that a main reason people don't like to do something is because they don't know how to do it or they're not good at it.

So I say practice is perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. On today's show, I'm joined by Alex Cooper and Sophia Franklin from the popular podcast, Call Her Daddy. And we're talking about oral sex tips on both sides and while we all need to speak up a bit more in the bedroom.

I'm also answering your emails, topics and clips. What is the Gluck Gluck 9000, and how do you do it? So your partner is overly religious. How do you respect their faith and also get sexual? You're a woman who comes super fast, ways you can slow things down and enjoy sex longer. And you just can't stop thinking about your ex. How do you stop the thoughts and focus on your current partner? All this and more, thanks for listening. Hey, Avaline, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got a hair stand. Oh my!

The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common, what do you mean like laundry? It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm off here. I'm so broke. Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Avaline's not the kind of girl you just play with. I'm not a bad boy.

I'm not a bad boy. I'm not here. So, I'm going to be in bed, feels pretty good. But you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between for more information. Check out SexWithEmily.com. You're going to love our site. Lot more information on there to help you have the sex life, the relationship, the dating

life that you all want, and deserve. You can also find me Monday through Friday on Series XM-Sylight Radio, it stars Channel 109. It's 5-7pm Pacific, and it's been awesome. You guys should totally call in. You can call in any night. Even if you don't have serious, you can call in Tribal 8-9-4-7-8-2-7-7 or get a free 30-day trial at sexwithemily.com slash SXM and find us on all social media wherever you're at. It's at sex with Emily across the board. All right guys I hope you enjoy the show. Oh, I'm so excited my sexy guest just walked in This is exciting. Okay you guys. I have my guest Sophia Franklin and Alex Cooper we're gonna get to...

We've had some tech, it's been like Mercury's in retrograde in the studio the entire night so far. Okay. But it's only been 20 minutes, so it's all gonna work out. They do an awesome podcast called Call Her Daddy, it's at Call Her Daddy, it's a podcast, you can find it everywhere, Call Her Daddy, it's Barstool Sports, they played on the ear and series XM. Yeah. It airs at 11 p.m. Eastern on Barstool Radio Channel

and it's available on demand on the Series XM app. And you guys are a blast. I love being on your podcast. But we'll come out soon. I get it. I will, yes. Okay, which is great. But last time I got to ask you something,

Sophia, the delayed ejaculator, just give me update. Like that's. Oh my god. Emily? We thought it's so crazy you're asking because we recently just discovered. Emily, so I never talked to him about it and I ended up talking to him about it

and because we're still dating. Stop, you were still seeing. Okay, okay. And you know why he told me and you always say like to use communication, which I wasn't doing, I never brought it up to him, I just assumed he was, He was in February, okay.

Right, so I talked to him about it and he was like what are you talking about? He's like you've just never told me to come and I was like well, what do you mean? He was like he's like you've just never told me to do it so then I was like okay, well then show me And they had a quickie and we had a quickie and he came in like 15 minutes. I'm shocked I know my sex hat right now in like 15 minutes. I'm shocked. I know. I know.

I know. I know. Because of delayed ejaculation, like to recap, we were dating a guy that did not, like he just took forever to come, or he never came. What was it like for ever? Like it was a two to three hour situation.

Two to three hours. Yeah, I'm tired again here. Like you don't even need to work out. Yeah. The sex is your work out. Yeah, it sounds kind of like a two for a but. It was fun. I mean, it was fun, but there were times where I was like,

okay, I can't be doing two, three hours every single time. No, it's exhausting. So finally, you're just like, hey, I brought it up to him, which I wasn't bringing it up, which was my fault, but I brought it up and he was like, well, what are you talking about?

He's like, I could come in five minutes if you want. And I was like, well, then show me. And he showed me. I gotta say, this guy's just been elevated because a lot of guys don't know. I know. I know. I know. So he's just on a good level.

He's a unicorn. Okay, so Alex, anything dating? Oh, you know what? What do you know? I've been dating almost a lot. We always joke we're like research purposes. Yes. And I think it's terrifying to some guys,

and we've talked about it with you where it's like, they know that I have this podcast and so when I'm going out on dates, some of them try to pretend they don't know I have the podcast, it's 2019, you stalk people before you go on dates, you know I have this show. So recently I've been dating a guy that I think he was right up front and said, I've listened

and I think it's hilarious and it's been way more successful than the guys that are like, so what do you do for a living? Right, and the guys that talk about sex. And the guys that do that, it always comes out. It always comes out. They always say something that you're like, you would only know that from.

Exactly. And if we talk about the guys that I listen, like, well, your mom and Florida, I'm like, how do you know my mom's a Florida? There you go. You fucked, you know that. If you don't listen to my show. So that's good.

So that's what you want. You want someone to be down with what you're doing. Yeah, totally. Well, it's definitely him. I do. I think I've realized that going into this business, it's going to take a very confident man to be with us, very. Because they're so insecure.

If you hear about our show, you have to have some big hoonist to get on. Yes, absolutely. And you'll be able to find them. I mean, I told you this, this is, and this is still, and you guys guys get this I feel like they're like my we're all in the same boat every day I get asked this the same thing is a hard and I've met guys It's not a problem. You're always gonna meet the guys like they're gonna be confident. They're gonna be you'll meet a man Yeah, I'm like yeah, they take about sex. They're hilarious. I appreciate their art what they do. They're amazing I'm great. We're gonna have amazing chemistry and I'm gonna give her what she wants

If you can't handle it, then it was Okay, so how's your sex life going? Oh, I need to know, like, what's, tell me about it. What's great about it? I think that my sex life actually has gotten even better because of the hot sweaters. We just can ask you guys. So naturally, I know some girls,

which we try to get our audience to talk more about sex. And I know you do too. It's like, there are so many girls that are so upset because they don't have girlfriend that they can be like We're how do you give them a blowjob? And what are you doing when you're on top? Yeah, and so because we're so open about it and even more open because it's our show and it's our job now to talk about it We have been I think Exploring more options so that on Wednesday we can give people I think exploring more options so that on Wednesday we can give people the rundown.

You have a story. So that makes so much sense. So for sex, I mean, yeah, it's got better. I mean, absolutely. And we're having to sit there and be like, okay, so like what made this one experience so amazing? What made this sex so great?

So we're sitting there kind of detailed. Yeah, going through it. Yeah, going through it. Okay, so when I started my podcast, it was like, before I was even like went to school for sex, I was just like, when people would tell me they had amazing sex and like, back up, what does that mean? So is that what you guys are like?

Yeah, I think the love that, the first. It is good. I think the first thing that we really hit with our audience was blow jobs. And because we realize, not, you're graphic on this. No, dude, okay. But like, a lot of girls know how to give a blow job. Yeah, they just don't. And I think that we always say listen,

you're not going to not get a man because you're not going to embed, but sex is a huge part of the relationship. Hell, so we talk girls how to do what we call as the Gluck-Gluck 9000. I don't think I know this. Okay, it is this. It's the double hand twist, Gawk Gawk combo.

It's every man's kryptonite. Oh, I don't tell me. Emily, these girls are writing in saying, oh my God, I've changed my life. This has changed my life. Can you guys do the gluck? Did you guys, did you make this? It's on Urban Dictionary now.

People wrote it in out. You can look it up. Yeah, so basically, I think a lot of girls did not, like we said, did not know how to give a blowjob So we started with the basics and we went so into detail what to do with your hands what to do with your mouth the sloppyness the saliva Girls don't know how to give blow jobs and I swear you can give a blow job You know what because I watch their soul leave them when I give it to like I'm kidding, but from personal experience I

I'm kidding. But from personal experience, I didn't know, and Alex told me about the Glockluck, and then I tried it, and this guy was like, what did they come from? What is it? Tell me. So I wish we had a thick up. Okay, so basically the gloves, yeah. The Glockluck is contingent upon the hands,

and we always tell girls, like if you use two hands on a man's penis, he is going to feel like he is the biggest penis in the world. And the thing is, is even small penises, you can use two hands, you just use your index finger and your thumb and then you just get bigger. As the penis gets bigger, the more fingers you put on it and the more grip. So if it's a small penis, your index finger and your thumb come together and then you're left in your right hand You go on top and then you're going double your 20 and opposite direction. There's a 3000 where you go in the same direction and then the 9000 you take your hands and go in opposite direction

Yeah, I think a lot of girls assume it's all about the deep throw. It's no It's really not I think the sloppiness is one of the biggest things that we've taught girls and they had no idea. We're like, the wetter that thing is, you need to act like you're in the desert, dying for water and it's like a bottle of Poland's bread. And you are dying for that dick. And I know it's graphic. No, it's graphic.

We're being graphed. But you're not dying, but you guys are in joy. No, you guys are super, super, super, super. You're gonna get kicked out. It's a sex, but it's like, no, I'm, but first of all, what if you're not into it? What if you're like, but the smells better taste? But we get it all the time.

Absolutely, I think that a lot of girls. Do you guys enjoy it when you're doing this? This is the thing. I think that a main reason people don't like to do something is because they don't know how to do it or they're not good at it. So I say practice, yeah, perfect. Start practicing. Just say like, I want to try something on you, babe. Tell me

if you like this because every guy is getting very, very average head on a day to day basis. Girls are just like doing one motion the whole time going up and down. They're just a lot of girls. I mean, a lot of girls. No, I'm trying to think. I just, yeah. The, the fee back when you go to service them because they don't, yeah, you should use hands. You're using a lot of, you're playing with the balls. They don't even know the tip of the ball. Do you guys know about the frenulum, the underside of the penis? Like, this is the tip, so here's the penis.

Like, so this is the tip. We're using a sharpie everyone. So this is the tip, right? And then where the shaft meets the head, this underside is the frenulum. It's like your new best friend. Can you make it like the friend friend Glock glove, 2000? But you lick that little shirt, is that part of it?

Yes, yes, yes. And even like lick it. The weiner hole, we joke. But like weiner hole. That is something you should, every part of the penis you should be stimulating. Even the side of his dick, I found a lot of guys, if you start licking on the side, they freak out. There's just so many layers that girls are only going up and down and thinking that's a blowjob. And I swear if you start to incorporate the sloppiness,

the wetness, it's going to be wet. Yeah, I'm going to use the loop. Have you guys used the loop? Oh my gosh, we brought you some loop too. I knew we did. I mean, course so how I want toys. Because I bought the womanizer because I heard it on your show. Okay, and it changed my life. Tell me. It's amazing. Right? I didn't like vibrators really.

I couldn't have orgasms and then I tried the womanizer and I'm upset. Oh my God, it's so happy. It's like a clit whisper I call. It's like interreply similar to clitoris. So you guys, I know that first of all, the blow-dup thing is amazing. Now, what about oral though? what about guys going down on you?

Okay, the coach gobbler combo. We have the weirdest words. We put titles with everything so that you need to remember the coach gobbler combo. Coach gobbler, okay? Yeah, so when we told guys kind of exact how to do it, so many girls were complaining, guys were just going in there, putting their face in there and just slapping up with peanut butter. And we were like, women's clips are sensitive. So many guys don't understand that. And we gave them a play by play. The coach golver is like, the figure eight motion with your tongue. We told guys to hum on a girl's clip is actually like a great feeling. And make out with it. Make out with it.

Start slow is a huge thing. Yeah, it was gonna start slow. I think a lot of guys didn't know the humming on the clip, which is, again, it has to be done very correctly. Correctly. But it has every woman's good. Not every woman's good.

It's not a tricky piece of every woman's different. Yeah. And that's the thing we tell guys. So it's start doing something. Yeah. And if you feel her body tension. Check in. Yes. And guys, I think are just as insecure, thing we tell guys so it's start doing something and if you feel her body. And guys I think are just as insecure even if not more when they go

down on a woman than a woman going down on a man. A guy doesn't with his ego. He doesn't want to be wrong. He goes down there. He thinks he knows who doing. Sometimes he doesn't want to ask. They're at least our age specifically. Yeah. I love when a guy's like babe do like that. Absolutely. I'll tell you. Do you feel like guys do ask because they don't ask enough. I don't think they do. I don't think guys ever ask.

So we're telling guys now, they should ask. Younger guys do not ask. But then they don't want to feel insecure. Right. They don't want to feel insecure. Like there's nobody. Right. Like they's like, I gotta know the way I'm a guy.

I don't ask for directions. I already know what to do. No, I don't even know. No, I don't even know. It is so hot when a man makes you know he wants you to come. And he's going to do whatever it takes. I got a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little Anything like you fantasize about I I kind of have been into like the daddy daughter stuff I think it's kind of fun when people don't like to talk about that But I have podcasts is called call her daddy He's called her daddy is their podcast you have to check it out

It's also here on barstool sports at 11 o'clock on Saturday and color daddy. So that's hot. The why don't people want to talk about it right? Yeah Because like daddy daughters and that's the thing The why don't people want to talk about it? Right. Yeah, because I think daddy don't. And that's the thing we always say. It's like, you gotta get over that. Fanacies don't mean you actually want that in real life. Right. We've talked about rape fantasies with you.

What do you call it? I like to talk about it. Yeah. A force, yeah. A force, yeah. A force, yeah. A force, yeah. It's like you're role playing.

Not consensual sex. Yeah. It's like role playing and it doesn't mean you know. We haven't talked about that on our show yet, but that's better sex. Yeah, it's like role-playing and it doesn't mean you know. We haven't talked about that on our show yet but that's their plan. Yeah, I think the thing is, I think you guys should because I think it's so interesting that people, yeah, right, not all fantasies are actually you want to get enacted. But the reason why role-playing is great, it's like it's in the privacy of your help, I mean, with your partner, but also it's like, like why do you like it so if you could explain

it? Like, it's hot to be like the little girl. Like, to explain what's in there. Yeah, like, but like, dominate. I know could explain it? Like, it's hot to be like the little girl. Like, take a look at that. Yeah, like, but like, dominate. I know, just him being dominant. Which is what most women want. Right, and that's like what they want.

Do I really like teacher? And I really think my dad absolutely not. It's the dominant thing. It's like when you're taking charge. When taking charge. Which is like the top fantasy for women is that men, that they're dominated. They're part or dominate.

That's the same thing with the four sex, right? It's a similar thing. Yeah, exactly. We just want to feel like with that whole thing, we're like the right fantasy or the non-consensual sex, it's something we want all those things. It's just that we, women have the desire to feel like a man can't do it.

He can't handle himself. He wants to ravish us. He loves to so, everything he just wants to, oh, and he's a gravisan it throws down, you know, and totally 100% per say. Yeah, but we want to be the I you know the object of their face. We always say on our show we're like, listen, if it feels good, don't deny it. If you like it, there's so many guys are afraid to talk about oh my gosh being stimulated in their their a-ness and it's like, but if it makes you come,

why are you acting like, oh, that's gay or whatever? If it's not gay, straight, whatever it is. If it feels good, do it. Right, yeah. I do know what you mean. If you guys had a guy to ask you to do that, if you pegged anymore, a good man. I haven't pegged anyone, but I've definitely played around with the brush.

Did you think her? Yeah, yeah. I think her mouth. Every time, how do you guys test that with a guy, putting a finger? I just, I usually do it obviously. Inus. I usually do it during a blow job's usually doing like a blow job.

And I'll start to just kind of ease there and play on the outside. And then maybe start to go in a little bit. And I've had guys usually, they'll be very upfront if they don't want it. Right. No, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not into that. I think also the licking, I know some girls are so grossed out,

but when you go down near the taint area, I find like a lot of men love that. And so if they stop you totally, but I'm totally down here. Yeah, go look around that whole area. I love that you got the whole thing with all the hands and the things. Because it turns me on to turn him on.

And that's why I think giving a blowjob is so hot to me. It's like, you can make it hot because you're watching him, you own him in that moment. Yeah, exactly. You can do whatever you want and he's gonna love you for it. And so it's hot.

And your color off? It's on that. Because we get a lot of calls from women on the show. We go call in. You guys can call us triple eight nine four seven eight two seven seven. Call her daddy. Call her dad. Awesome women here.

And they say like, I just don't like it. How do I get into it? It's kind of like they either had a bad experience. Someone told me they were bad or it grossed about. Oh no. And it's like think about it. It is. First of experience, someone told them they were bad or it grossed them out. And it's like, think about it, it is. First of all, you're in the power position. And you're like, this is an extension of this person that I love or I like enough to have

sex with. And you just look at it, it's another part of it. And you get into it. Right. I'm there. I'm one with your penis. I'm licking it. And I would love to tell women that it's not like if you can get out of your head and

just be like, this is something I'm pleasing him. And the more you're doing it, you're realizing you're doing the right, when enthusiasm is like the number one tip. Oh yeah, that's you, just the enthusiasm. It's like the pollen springs in your head. It doesn't look like you're dying for that dick. No, but seriously, whenever I talk to my guy friends,

he's like, listen, every guy loves a blowjob, but it is kind of shitty when you look down, and this girl looks like she wants to fall asleep. She's not. She's not. And you hear that from guys that she's young. Yeah.

And it's like, okay, well let's just have sex then because this is boring. Right. So, you know, show that you're into it. Imagine if you saw your guy going down on you and he's like falling asleep. He's done that. Or you just. Not my guy. Well, well, historically.

Do you feel like guys, but I think it's the same thing. Like if a guy goes down and he's like, yeah, I'm going to do this. And then he goes down and he's like two seconds. Like he does like lick lick and then comes back up. What do you do? What do you do that did nothing for me? You know, we call those little bitch boys. You can give me a sandwich, right?

You got to wake up. I'm on. Yeah, I'm on. But you like it. You guys like receiving oral. Oh my God. Oh my God. 100%. Give it to me all day.

Do you require it? Do you tell like, go down to me first? Absolutely, if that would be like a deal breaker for sure. Yeah, if a guy said he wouldn't. I think for sure, 100% almost. Yeah, almost 100%. Like, if a guy is not, especially because of how much I'm reciprocating oral, like if you're not gonna go down on me

then I don't know. Right, why would you? It's like a quid pro quo. I'm trying to think if it's like, there's like kind of a blow job, like a big blow quo. Well, I also find like when I am so giving, as you would say, in these blow jobs, like I find guys then are more eager to go down on me and like wanna to do the same amount of energy.

So it's great. I'm afraid of you guys to be single now and dating. Like look what you're talking about. Jesus, you know what I mean guys are like. We're scared why? Just because I want you guys to be safe here in New York talking about giving the best blow jobs ever. That's all my parents are scared to.

No, I don't know. My parents were, I'm just like, you know what's the last. No it's a big place. It's awesome though. Okay so you guys have kind of gotten toys. You said you do the womanizer but then did you do a show? You talked about getting into toys or? So yeah, we talk, I mean, we talk about all of them.

I think a lot of people have never used butt plugs, which is like girls are like, oh my god, I'm so scared. Yeah, like, you know, we try to explain to girls. It's not scary. But plugs are great vibrators, clit stimulators. Yeah. And we've kind of tried them all. Yeah, I favorite being a woman We've well-humanized them.

The womanizer's great. I think the butt plugs is huge because a lot of girls don't know if you're having your clit stimulated and you have something in your ass, like your orgasm feels so amazing because of kind of like that fullness. We talk to a lot of girls that are like college, or there's even a little bit of high school

and early 20s and a lot of girls that are like college or even a little bit of high school and you know early 20s And a lot of people don't know this guy's I'm so glad they have you they don't know Yeah, I don't even have vibrators and they're like oh my god I'm scared to order it because I'm connected to my parents credit card Yeah, yeah, what do you do with your parents credit card? They're like how's it? On with your parents credit card, they're like, oh my God, how's that count? I haven't sent to you a friend call, right? I didn't come on. Work around it, work around it.

Or go by your own, it's like, we bought you some toys too. Oh my God, I'm so excited. And we got you some fun things, I know. So what else has happened lately? Like, sex thing, anything new, you said you're being guinea pigs, what else have you tried? I need to know.

I need to know. What else have we been trying? I mean, just, like every Wednesday, you've like the pressure, right? You're like, it's definitely a lot of, but it's, it's so exciting because we have so many people writing in stories. We had a girl write and actually she was into like BDSM with this new guy and then recently she walked into his apartment and he was like, take off all your clothes, go into my drunk

drawer, take that marker and write all over yourself what you want me to do to me. So like she wrote in her inner thighs, like, bite me and like, like me. And then like, on her tits, she wrote stuff on her ass. She was like, daddy's little cum, whatever. Like, oh shit. And she did it with the craziest sex ever. And it was great because she wrote all this stuff all over herself. And it was another form of four-plates.

It isn't nothing. The word dressed in a butt. It's so hot. So I never thought of that. No, that's a really good one. So you could do that. Do you have a permanent marker or just regular one. So you could have a permanent marker, just regular markers.

It ended up being a permanent marker. And she had to go on like a beach trip the next day with her family. And she was like, Yeah, that's the best. She like faked the flu. And she was like, oh my god, I have like daddy's little cum slap about my belly button.

I'm like, I can't go to the family beach trip. I'm sorry dad. So she like faked the flu. Like my god. That is amazing. So good. I love you guys. You're awesome. Okay, wait. I've questions to ask you guys Right this is what we ask everyone. Okay, ready? How would you describe your sex life in three words each one of you? I could ask you oh Oh my gosh

Progressive. Oh, I like that fun and Oh my gosh, okay. Progressive. Oh, I like that. Fun and sexy. I know sexy might sound like that, but I can do it. No, nothing lame about the colored daddy girls. I would say wild adventurous and like hot steamy. Nice. Okay, she got more words.

Okay, you can add another one. Okay, what's your biggest turn on? One thing. I think when a guy can finger me really well, that's like the hottest thing. I'm so attracted to a guy that knows how to finger her. He knows what to do. Okay, and I would say when a guy knows how to give me oral.

Okay, yeah. Okay, good, good. Big female pleasure. Biggest turn off. When a guy is clearly so in it to get off, and he doesn't care about you getting off, you can tell. Good Jackhammer with the fingers,

Jackhammer with his dick, you're like, oh my God, I'm just literally like a pocket pussy right now. What is going on? Yeah. Okay, wait, what is yours? Oh, this is gonna sound super lame, but if he sucks at kissing, oh my God, that's a big bad thing. Because I'm immediately, I'm like, so is this going to translate into bad? Yeah, I can't,

I can't, but you can, there's a worker out for that. But I have your say, okay, your number one sex tip. Confidence. You fake it till you make it. Even if you don't feel confident in that moment, you go in there, you get on top, you ride that thing like an equestrian, you do your thing, and you're good. I would say communicating like this guy thought I had deleted Acculation for four months and he didn't I this is a So much just this little time here. Yeah, you guys. Thank you for being on I so appreciate you both You've checked out Sophia Franklin Alex Cooper. It is at Color Daddy everywhere else if I write podcast daddy the podcast comes out every single Wednesday. Yeah, it is at ColorDaddy everywhere. We're also at the right podcast. ColorDaddy, the podcast comes out every single Wednesday.

Yeah. It's awesome. Thanks for being here. All right, we're going to take a quick break and we come back. We're going to get into your emails. All right, guys. Love answering your questions. I like when we get to this part of the show, if you have a question you want answered on the show,

just go to my website, sexwithemle.com, click the Ask Emily tab, belt a short form and boom. Or you can email feedback at sexwithemle.com, but please, please, please include your name, your age, where you live, and how you listen to the show. Okay, thanks guys.

Alright, Jamie, you wanna read the email? This first one comes to us from Pamela 46 in Ohio. Hi Emily, I'm a divorce single mom at the young age of 46 and have been in a relationship with a wonderful man. He's 54. He's very, very strong faith and does not believe in premarital sex. He says, I'm different and does not want our relationship based on sex. He asked me why I'm willing to give up the marriage benefit without being married. He's also divorced. I've discussed with him my concerns. I've told him that sexual chemistry is very important to me. I've even asked him about oral sex. He says he's attracted to me and we passionately kiss and make out, but he hasn't even tried

to touch my chest or any other body parts. How do I argue with what the Bible says? I'm trying to respect his faith and not seem like a sex crazed nymphomaniac, but looking for any insight you may have on this matter, I have not experienced anything quite like this before in my previous relationships. Thank you. Alright, Pamela. Okay, here's the deal. I understand that this guy, you been with him for six months and you're the young age of 46, which I love. 46 is very young. You have a whole lifetime ahead of you of sex. And I, he might be a great guy and you feel like you really know him so far, but you are never gonna get him to change his beliefs,

especially at 54. It's who he is. And so I just think even the fact that he's not even willing to be touching you right now, you must be like, maybe I should just marry him so I can actually figure out and have sex with him You know because he's not giving you what you need right now And I'm not sure you can't guarantee that you're gonna marry him and you're gonna get what you need then either Especially if he's not that into oral sex or even exploring right now

Do you even touch do it all so I think you have to really decide? Is this guy the one for you? If you've been listening to the show, you know how important sexual communication is. And you know how important it is to give up some beliefs that might no longer serve you and figure out how to be a great partner to yourself and to others. And so I'm not sure he's going to be the guy that's going to be able to even communicate about sex once you are married. I mean, once you tie the knot, what if things aren't as great with him?

What if he's not as giving in the bedroom or he's not able to, you know, to participate, actually, in the, because you know that relationship take work and to keep the sex interesting, you want to keep expanding and growing. We don't even know any of this yet. It's like you're signing on this dotted line

without knowing what you're buying and that to me is really of concern. I mean obviously you can't argue what his interpretation of the Bible says I understand that but you have to think about your own religion and what you want and what's important to you It sounds like you are doing all the compromise here and he's not so you're saying I'm trying to respect his faith And that seemed like a sex crazed nymphomaniac There is zero things that make you a sex crazed nymphomaniac. There are zero things that make you a sex crazed nymphomaniac because you want to explore with him sexually before you get married. I mean, the fact that there's not even any touching

or oral or he hasn't touched your nipples yet, I would be jumping out of my skin. So what you could do here is just sit down with them and say that there has to be some give and take here, that you're gonna need some more intimacy with him before you can actually decide if you wanna walk down the aisle with him. I also don't see what the rush is.

Six months into me is not enough time to really get to know if he's your guy. Remember, it takes us sometimes people, the first year we don't even show our true selves. We just bring our representative. So I think at least a year you'll know more. You have some of these really serious conversations with him so you can figure out if he's a partner for you or not,

but I wouldn't jump into it yet and keep talking. Thank you so much for your email, Pamela. This next one comes to us from Alexis, 27 in Paris. It is a mail. Hi Emily, I'm contacting you because I haven't had sex in two years, and I feel like I'm losing my flirting confidence, so I figured that you might help. I'm pretty sure I'm dating material, attractive, social, and fun, and I pursue many interests like Latin dances, but I constantly have this feeling of being friends and by girls, or maybe it's just my lack of confidence. In your

podcast, balancing your sexual energy, you talked about us having masculine and feminine energies, which made me realize that I'm naturally attracted to women with a very feminine energy, but my dominant energy is feminine as well. I talk about my feelings easily, I listen to my intuition, and I have a lot of empathy. It's ironic because in my life I'm very proactive, and when I dance or when I'm in bed I'm very dominant, masculine energy. I take charge. Unfortunately, I often don't make it to the bedroom because I'm not masculine enough in

the flirting process. I know that it's in me naturally, but I just feel like I'm unable to express the side of myself to the lack of confidence, so it's a vicious cycle. I really want to unleash my masculine energy to better flirt with women. I was hoping you would have some good advice and that it would not only benefit me, but I'll mend who don't feel confident enough to openly flirt at love at first sight. PS, your show is awesome. Hmm.

Thank you, Alexis. And thank you for listening to the show. I really love this question because there's so much about dating that is about our self-confidence. And being confident and just to go out there and start talking to people and not second-guessing yourself, so that is really real. And I think that you've such a maturity that you're actually noticing this in yourself. And women have it too. We start to second-guess ourselves and then we actually keep ourselves from putting ourselves

out there and finding what we want. So first, let me, let's talk a little bit about the masculine and the feminine energy. So what I was talking about in that podcast and what I often refer to is we all have masculine and feminine energy, whether a man or a woman, you know, same sex relationships. We talk about masculine and feminine. So typically, I think I was saying that I'm more masculine during the day. I want a business, I'm doing a show. And then when I'm sexual, I'm more feminine.

So I want to be with a partner who brings the masculine so you have that polarity in the bedroom. So I think what we're talking about here is that is you bringing that polarity to your flirting process and once you get into the bedroom. So what you really have to do is practice taking when you say that you are more masculine, when you're dancing or when you're when you get to bed, when you're in bed, I think the thing you got to do is think about who Alexa is in those moments and then bring that confidence into the room when you're walking up to someone to flirt with them or when you meet someone. Now typically, the masculine brings the structure, right? The masculine is sort of a container for women to feel safer to express who they are and

express their feelings and feel like it's going to be held by a man. Right? And so the masculine is receiving feminine energy and that's sort of nurturing him and it's a cycle. So the more that a man can hold the energy for a woman, the more that she's seeing it feeling his masculine energy because she feels safer on him. So that means that, you know, you feel past her words, you feel past what she's saying and you just hold a safe space. And that is about breath, and that is about you feeling connected

to your body, which actually brings confidence. And so you want to make her feel like you are the kind of guy that she can open up to, and flirt with. You sound so evolved to me for your age, especially. And I know you haven't had sex in two years, and I feel like the only thing is you're getting your practice, just like you practice dance or other things. Remember that flirting and talking to members

of the sex that we're attracted to takes work. I mean, it's like a muscle. It's like a muscle, and if we don't use it, we lose it. And the problem is, the more we're not doing it, those messages creeping our head like, well, now no one's gonna like me. It's been so long, I don't have the confidence. And so, I feel like leading with your masculine would just be going up to women.

You say that you are definitely talk about your feelings easily, but this would be more listening. And maybe it's also the way you hold yourself. And it's practicing a confident stature before you go into a place and being more in your body and presence. So if you do any meditation work, it sounds like you're dancing. So you must be very in touch with your body. And I feel like you're closer than you think.

And I think for a lot of men, it really is just, and for women too, it's a practice. So maybe Alexis, when you're out, you're at parties or you're at an event, or you're even in the workplace, or you're getting lunch at work, and you see someone attract over, you see someone you'd like to talk to,

just practice talking to them. There's not a pickup line, those don't work. It's really just in your most comfortable way, saying, great whether we're having, where'd you get that sandwich from? Literally just asking about something that's happening in the moment, observing something. Like if you're waiting in line for coffee,

you can observe something and then you ask a question. I didn't realize I started selling lattes here. Have you had their lattes? They answer question and then you respond. I mean, you said that you're sociable, you feel like you're attractive. And so I think you've just taken yourself out of the game. So sometimes practicing of the people that we maybe were interested in, maybe not, but just exercising that muscle, asking the questions, observing things that are going on and listening, being a really good listener. That's half the battle. Think of when you meet a new friend, or you go somewhere, someone likes you,

when you're at a party, it's because you're talking, you're exchanging information, and you're truly connecting. So maybe this will also help you take these women that you're flirting with off a pedestal and just realize it is a conversation, and we all want to feel safe, we want to feel heard, and we want to feel that people notice us. So noticing certain details about them,

and maybe compliments are great too. Compliments have been very specific. Like, I really like that color of your eyes. It's really pretty green or even I like your shoes. I think that you're way closer than you think. I can tell by your email. So just get out of your head. Don't beat yourself up for this and just talk to people and continue to do activities

you like. Things that you're interested in. That's also where we meet more like-minded people. And I think you're gonna find that that flirting is just there and it's a natural skill that you already have within you. Thanks Alexis. This next one comes to us from Myra, 33 in California.

Dear Emily, I love listening to your podcast. I've married 15 years and we have a good sex life, but the problem is I come way too fast. I'm very kinky and into pretty much anything until I come. Then it's like a bucket of cold water is poured over me. The dirty talk becomes almost annoying at that point, and I cannot wait for him to be done. We're interested in having a threesome,

and I love fantasizing about it, but I'm scared that if we go through it, I will be over it, and I will regret it. What can I do to not be completely out of it once I finish? All right, Mera, okay, thank you for this question. I think a lot of you are going, wait, what, she comes quickly?

I wish I could come quickly. Most women don't, or even orgasm through sex. So it's not as common, but this definitely happens. And what I'm going to tell you is, you have so much potential here to learn to have sex and pleasure in other ways. Now, our first step I'm going to tell you is what I tell a lot of men who come before they want to

or come quickly is edging and teasing yourself, meaning when you're masturbating or even your partner can do this, they can tease you until you feel like you're about to have the orgasm and then you bring it back down, you breathe. And then you bring yourself up again and then you bring yourself down so you can extend your pleasure and extend your orgasm. So when you finally do come, it's going to be a lot more intense. And so I also think like there's potential for you to also focus on other areas of the body.

It sounds like if you have this one, you know, orgasm just from sex and you are really kinky, I think, getting into other areas like power play or BDSM might really help you, you know, just take out the penetration, even take out the genital touching, but maybe some more playfulness with your partner and bringing some more like kink into it, like you said, and not going right for penetration will be great for you. Also, the part about like, oh, when you're done, you're done and you feel like you got cold water poured over your head, that's your brain telling you that. That's probably is how you have felt, but that is not how you have to always feel.

You really seem to learn to retrain, I suggest that you retrain your brain and your body. And that meaning that when you're done with that orgasm, just breathe into it, okay? Breathe into it, and maybe you start to please your partner at the point, I know you don't really feel like it, you said you're done, but what if you just breathe and see, am I really done? Maybe you have your partners have to touch you and other parts of your body.

You know, fingers off the clitoris, not even the vulva, but maybe they start to tease, you know, your neck or your chest or give you a massage because then the sexual energy can start to build again. So once you retrain your body, you'll realize there's more potential here to experience more types of orgasms and more types of pleasure than you've even experienced before. I would definitely take the threesome off the table for now, even though you love fantasizing about it until you guys figure out a new way to expand your sexual repertoire together and I think you got to bring him into this process You've been together for 15 years and I think letting him know that this is what's happened in the past You feel like it's a cold bucket of water and you're done

Which you probably know is but saying I'm gonna try some of these new things So the master patient part you can do in your own But let him know that you'd like to try new things right after you come to see if you can have a different experience, and I totally think it is possible for you, Myron. Alright, this next one is from Austin 25 in Louisiana. Hey Emily, I've been having thoughts lately on my first real ex. I'm currently in a really nice relationship that's doing fine, but it seems lately I can't get my mind away from her.

Now this ex was my first real and longest relationship. The breakup wasn't bad, and we hooked up once or twice afterwards, but it didn't go anywhere. I'm afraid that my mind drifting to the thoughts of my X have been keeping me from holding a relationship since. Even now, I'm beginning to feel like I'm drifting from my current girlfriend, and I really love her and don't want to lose her. What do you think? All right Austin, so just so you know you're not alone here. Our first boyfriend, our girlfriend, our first relationship,

is really the one that we hold. It's the most difficult breakup. It's the one we often remember the most, because it's the first time we really fell in love, and it's the first time we really went through a breakup. It's a very common pattern to kind of have this thing, this euphoric recall, that everything we remember about them is amazing, and we put it on this pedestal, and we think think it was the best relationship and how can we get back to it.

But a lot of it just has to do with some nostalgia and it doesn't necessarily mean just because you're thinking about them all the time that you should be with them. It could mean so many other things. Like maybe you just miss romance. Maybe what you're missing right now is you guys had more romance with that partner and you're not having that now. Maybe you liked the way that she made you feel and you're not necessarily having those feelings right now.

You're like, essentially, you, there are certain aspects you liked of that relationship that you are telling yourself you're not having now. So it's sort of nostalgic. Now, I think what you could do, another thing is it could also be keeping you safe by constantly having your ex to think about. It's sort of a process that it's allowing you to, it's keeping you from being able to

really commit to your current partner. Maybe you have some fear on your current partner. Maybe you know deep down, she's not right for you, or maybe you know deep down, she is and you're afraid of those emotions. You're afraid of getting hurt again. You're afraid of really opening your heart again, which is really a process. A lot of us just, we go through break up, we shut down and we're afraid. So all of these things could be going on, but I don't think it necessarily has to do

with the fact that you should leave this woman and go be with your ex. I think what it does is just take, don't fight it to say, oh, there I am again, thinking about my ex. What am I thinking specifically? And then you can go granular. Are you thinking about you and your ex-onification together? Are you thinking about things you used to do together? And then you could think, well,

I actually want to create new memories with my new partner. What could I do to turn all the attention I'm putting toward the ex towards my current relationship? Because then you'll know that you're actually trying to make this one work and you'll be able to really make a great decision, is this person for me or not without having the shadow of the axe hanging over you. So that's my best advice for you Austin, but don't be yourself up because we all do this a little bit.

God, I tell you, never forget that first. Never. All right, this last one comes to us from Tina 34 in the United States. Hi, Emily. My husband struggles with anxiety and depression for which he takes medication. As Sistose has gone higher, his libido is nearly non-existent. Ironically, he hates taking medication. So I'm hoping you can guide us in the direction of more natural remedy.

They may help lift him up, pun intended, and get him in the mood. Love your show. Hey, Tina. Okay, so anxiety is rampant right now. I feel like everybody's got some anxiety and we keep hearing about it. We're reading about it. I have anxiety. It's just common, right? The most common thing could be for a million different reasons. But let me tell you the best things that I know about anxiety and it takes work

and it doesn't go away unless you stick with specific practices. Let me get to the list in one second. But first about the anxiety. If he has to say on his medication for anxiety and depression, the first thing he has to do is go to his doctor and set, let your doctor know that I no longer

have a libido, I'm not feeling a rouse anymore, can have a direction or whatever it is, and then the doctor can play with the medication. He can take them down. He can take them down in some medication. He can bring other medications in. So there's definitely ways to work on this. So many people suffer from the sexual side effects and they don't have to. So that's the first thing.

The other thing is, I can tell you, from more natural holistic remedies is breath. Our mind dictates everything that we feel in our body. So if you learn to breathe and to meditate every day, there are so many great apps out there right now. Simple habit is a great app that you can use because it's like you don't even have to think of a meditation routine on your own. You can find one on different apps. You can do it two minutes a day.

Practice breathing, practice meditation, movement. Also really, really important for anxiety and depression. Yoga, stretching, just moving your body and also sleep. Sleep is super important too. If we have really good sleep like eight hours a night, we will lessen the symptoms of anxiety and depression and diet as well. If he's drinking a lot of caffeine,

a lot of sugars, a lot of foods that are not great for him, that's also gonna amp up the anxiety. So I don't know of a natural remedy, CBD, actually many people like CBD, so Veritas Farms is one that we love, V-E-R-I-T-A-S. I like them because they actually have a farm and they make their own CBD, so we know the source. And I know that CBD has helped me taking some of their tinctures and I think that you can kind of explore that

I mean if you could try some CBD and that could help him and that's a more natural remedy It's a plant so I think that would be great try some of these things out talk to him about it first talk to the doctor No one should ever stop taking medication without talking to a doctor and then also Tina It's really hard to start new habits. So I know you've heard of breath before. You've heard of meditation. You've heard of yoga. You've probably read about it every time you pick up a magazine.

But really sometimes having a partner do it with us Tina, so maybe along with your husband, you guys could wake up in the morning and meditate for five minutes together. You could go for walks at night, so you're a nature and you're moving. So perhaps there's a way that you can also help him with it, so it's not on his own trying to figure out how to deal with the anxiety and depression, which is also the biggest killers of our sex drive. So I think all of that is tied in, and I think it's great to get more information from the doctor and to work with them.

And for more information about Veritas, you can go to sexwithendily.com slash Veritas. Thanks for your email. Veritas, you can go to sexwithfamily.com slash Veritas. Thanks for your email. All right, guys, great show. Thank you to the caller daddy, women for being on the show. That was a blast. Thank you. Everyone for listening and for supporting the show,

I love getting your emails. And it's so great when you subscribe to the podcast that helps us as well, wherever you're listening, you subscribe. And also when you tell your friends, in listening to this, maybe there was an email in here that you really thought was helpful for someone to hear Send it to them share it. It's really easy to share podcasts tell your friends about it spread the word

We so appreciate that we're releasing three podcasts a week and we do it because we love doing it So the more you spread the word the helpful the more helpful it is for all of us So thank you everyone. Thanks for amazing listeners and my team Ken, Kristen, Michelle, producer, Jamie, and Michael. Was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithemily.com.