Sex With Emily - Pleasure Imposters & Open Rosters

Episode Date: March 17, 2020

On today’s show, Dr. Emily is talking about “imposter syndrome,” what it is, and how that may be affecting your relationships. Plus, she answers your sex & relationship questions.She gives insight on why some of us feel we’re “imposters” when it comes to work, love, and friendship – when really, it’s just anxiety. Plus, advice on what to do when your partner has a touch of performance anxiety, how to bring up an open relationship to your partner, and whether or not there’s a magic sex number when it comes to frequency.Follow Emily on all social @sexwithemilyFor even more sex advice, tips & tricks, visit sexwithemily.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. I'm Dr. Emily and on today's show, I'm talking about imposter syndrome and how that may be affecting your relationships. Topics include, why we feel warm postures when it comes to work, love, and friendship, when really it's just anxiety. Is there a magic sex number? So you're dating someone new and they have a touch of performance anxiety. How can you get them past it? And you're curious about open relationships. How do you bring it up to a partner? All this and more, thanks for listening. Music

Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mark our sacred institutions. Betrubized they call them in a fight on day. Hey, Avaline, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got a hair stand. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage.

Isn't it common, not only? What do you mean, like laundry? It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm so dumb. Being bad feels pretty good. But you know, Avaline's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily.

We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information, check out sexwithemily.com. You're going to love our site. There's a lot of posts on there, blogs to help you have better sex, and then we're sex with Emily across the board on all social media. All right, intentions with Emily. For each show, please join me in setting an intention for the show. I do it. I encourage you to do the same. And what I mean is like right now, when you're listening, what attracted to the show? What, why do you want to listen to it? Think about what you want to get out of this particular

episode and how it could help you. Maybe it's like, wow, I've always felt like this and I didn't know that there was a name for it or I'm curious about Imposter Syndrome. Maybe my partner is experiencing this. My intention is to give you a little piece of mind that you're not alone in your strive to feel perfect. I've suffered from Imposter Syndrome.

I still do and I want to tell you a little bit about my story so it can help you deal with your own challenges. Enjoy the show. I was gone. I went back to the Bay Area. You know, I was in San Francisco for a long time, 25 years. And I was invited to speak at this women's conference, a group called The What.

And it's a group of really interesting, accomplished women who started a group essentially for women helping other women. So like they have a really active Facebook group where you can kind of post like, I need help with kids or travel or work. And it's just like a collective of women who are supporting other women's businesses.

And it's become like this huge online thing. And now they have a website and they had a conference. So they invited me to speak about sex, and they just put it if you speak about cooking, and it was super awkward, no, I'm kidding. Like, of course they were like, Emily spoke for an hour on cooking eggs. Yeah, exactly, there's specials.

They looked at me, I'm like, it's just turned. So it was like, what'd you speak on? I'm like, horticulture, front of my ass. What do you think I talked about? Jesus, your plants will die, but I'm like, what'd you speak out? I'm like, horticulture, front of my ass. What do you think I talked about? Jesus, your pants will die, but not your love life. So I went there, and it was, first of all, it was at Sky Walker Ranch, which is where all the magic happened.

If you're into Star Wars and George Lucas, anything. I was so jealous, it's so awesome. So we get there, and it's the most beautiful place. You really, it's not open to the public. You have to go through like six security guards and apparently they only allow like two groups there a month. And so we got to stay overnight. And there's about 150 women.

And so I was to give a speech the next day. And my speech is about prioritizing your pleasure. So throughout the day, I'm the sex speaker. But there was women there. There was probably about 10 15 speakers Another you know about people talking about hormones and people talking about business stuff and like tapping Which is like a type of therapy tapping? There was a button, but I didn't make it to the other things

I was you know prepping my speech and I was working on it and it's funny because I was and I was just actually Ran into a bunch of friends because I lived there, so it was all my peers. But as I'm working to speech mostly the night before and then a little that day, I gotta be honest with you that even though I've been doing this for almost 15 years, I'm a doctor of human sexuality and I've helped millions of people

have better sex and relationships. I got and I was nervous. I thought of all the places I speak, like now I'm talking, I don't know who's listening. I mean, I know a lot of you are listening, but I don't know you. But when you go somewhere to speak, I'm like, well, what if they already know this stuff?

What if they know? What if they prioritize their pleasure? What if they masturbate all the time? What if they are having amazing sex with their partner? And they don't need my help. Or what if they already have their communication skills or on point? and I started thinking, you know, they knew me back.

And the day in San Francisco, maybe they're, you know what I mean, then I realized it reminded me of something. I know something called imposter syndrome. I don't know if you guys have heard about this, but I remember my mom telling me about it because I used to have this, I'm trying to think I was like in my 20s,

the first time I brought it up, but essentially here's what imposter syndrome is. It's this feeling essentially that you're a fraud. And they say there was a study that showed like the top 5% of all CEOs and entrepreneurs and companies had a fear that one day someone's gonna knock on their door and be like, sorry, Mrs. Jones, when the study was done, you're, this isn't your job, you're supposed to be in the mail room or something like this fear that, like, no matter how

much we prove ourselves and how well we do in life, we're still kind of like fraud. I mean, it's also tied to self esteem and insecurities and all those things. And so, and then it came up because I was talking to another one of the women there who she also was an entrepreneur and ran a business and she had, it was a friend of mine that I hadn't seen a while and she got it gotten a really bad call. It was right after my speech actually

and she was like, talked her that night and she said she felt like she was always feeling and she got this multi-million dollar business. She's super successful and she was like, I feel like every day the company's gonna go under. Like something's gonna happen, someone's a food company, someone's gonna eat a bad piece of food

and like just this fear that she doesn't know or that someone else is gonna take over. So I just thought how that, it's just a really interesting to think about how we all have this, if this resonates with you. So essentially it's imposter syndrome and it's a condition, it's in the DSM3R.

There's TED talks on it because I went down a rabbit hole. Of course. How quite explain it. It's an the DSM3R. There's TED talks on it because I went down a rabbit hole. Of course. How quite explain it. It's an internal experience believing you're not competent as others perceive you and it's usually applied to intelligence and achievement. It has, it also is links to people who are perfectionists and people who think they have to do it all.

Super women. So it's actually in the DSM3R, the diagnosis, statistical manual of mental disorder. So like it's a thing. So it's not like I'm always everyday going, I hope people call it, they don't think I'm not really a doctor or whatever. But it comes up in places to tied loosely to social anxiety and stuff.

So I was thinking about how it relates, how it, you guys would feel about it. Do you know, like, I, and then, yes, I didn't know there was a name or a term. Right? But I feel like I definitely have that in like the sense that I do. Like I just feel like I always am striving to do

as much as I possibly can. And even when I do that, like, is it really enough? What could I have done more of like, how is this even my job? Like, why is it me doing this? I think that all the time. Or if I don't not good at something right away, because I normally am, I'm like, why am I not good at that? Like, I feel like it's already a failure, because I didn't get it right, like, right away. Right, exactly, because you, you, a lot of things have come easy to you. Exactly. And if it doesn't, you're like, I'm,

I'm bad, I'm wrong. Exactly. And so I feel I feel like that, but this is also, I think, the human condition that we all are really, we have this negative self-talk or we have self-doubt, self-esteem challenges. And I think that is the human condition. I mean, if you know anything about the Buddha, he would say that we all suffer in some way. The universal law of suffering is that we all have these monkey minds. And we all have this, like, and we believe it's our self, but if you really think about it, it's like, it's, it is our own voice and our head talking to us. So once you realize that voice saying, you're not good enough, she's going to leave you. Your penis isn't big enough. You're not a great enough lover. I think she still loves her ex.

What all those things running through your head are the human condition. I think our lesson on this planet, one of the life lessons we have to learn is how to overcome this kind of mind conditioning and realize that you guys get to control your mind, which is why we see such a, why we see the spread of

popularity of meditation and breathing apps and yoga. It's all about self-care. So all this self-care breathing mind stuff is because humans, we're the first mammals, the way we evolve to actually have a brain that's allowing us to think these thoughts. We can have positive negative thoughts. And so since we were, our ancestors, we had to worry about like fight or flight, get it catching food. We're always, you know, are we going to have enough food for our family? Are we going to get eaten by this wild boar that our brain sort of going to fight or flight?

And we're constantly scanning the environment for danger and thinking like, what could happen? What could happen? So, you know, this is just another version of that. What could happen is I could give a speech and be judged and I'll be outcast by people or we're worried our partner's gonna reject us. So I think. Do you think that's why? Cause like I noticed with a lot of people

that email in and call in that like, there's one person that's always trying to do all of it. Like you do all of the fixing in the bedroom and all the fixing. Absolutely. Like that's like, because that they're suffering from that maybe. Yeah, oh, the bedroom and all the fixing. Absolutely. That's like, because they are suffering from that maybe. Yeah, oh, that's a really good point. Absolutely.

I think that what happens in relationships, yeah, we don't want to talk about, and I hear this from women a lot, that we think that we have to fix everything. And if there's something wrong in the bedroom, it's our fault. We're not sexy enough. We're not making much of an effort. Our partner's not attracted to us anymore. We are responsible for the mental health, the physical health, the sexual, the sexual health of the relationships. And I feel like that is something that and meant to. We all,

I think we all feel that, that one of us typically would I see is there's one person in relationship who wants to improve, who kind of is getting into self-help or therapy or they're realizing that like, hey, there's a problem here and we can work it out and a lot of times there's one person who just doesn't, isn't evolved in that way. They don't have the emotional intelligence yet or interested in self-improvement, self-reflection and actually communicating about what's really going on because I think if couples realize that it's not one person's fault, you're both in the relationship, you're 50% of the and actually communicating about what's really going on because I think if couples realize it, it's not one person's fault.

You're both in the relationship. You're 50% of the problem. That we all, I believe that a lot of relationships could be saved if we do, if we learn how to talk about all of these things and not just take it on ourselves. I think what is stopping people from even thinking about sex or talking about sex is because they feel that if they bring it up

that their partner is going to tell them something horrible they've been doing or or their partner is going to judge them for asking so we just shut down. We don't want to be found out as a fraud as someone who's not doing well, who's failing, flunking sex. And we're like this conversation is easier just to repress because it's so deeply, it's so taboo, it's so we don't have practice talking about sex. We can bring up the dishes and the laundry and money, but with sex it's like, it's so as deeply tied to our self-worth. So that's what's happening. Wow, sorry, that's like deep. Yeah, deep. We're gonna take a quick break and we come back. We're going to get on to your calls.

All right, we're gonna talk to Jessica in Texas. Hey, Jessica 31, what's going on? Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hello. My question is, um, okay, so, and I'm not sure my husband, we've been married two years,

we've been, you know, together about 10 years and I just want to know, because I seem to like count how many times we have sex a week. What's, I mean, what's the normal for a couple? Well, I mean, you know, here's the thing. There's not like a normal number. Each couple, you guys get to decide what works, but it sounds like it's not working for you right now. Like how many times, how often are you having sex?

Tell me how you tell me your number, and then I'll tell you about my number. Really? Yeah. Really, really? It's really just once a number. Really? Yeah. Really, really? It's really just once a week. Oh, okay.

All right. And you would like to have it more times a week. I would. And it's not, I'm not blaming just him. I mean, I do get tired too. Right. I feel like it's an unhealthy number. For people that don't have kids yet.

Yeah, you know, it's funny. I kind of tell you just, good people are always like, how many times is normal? Like I get asked that question. For one of the top five questions I get asked all the time is like, how many often should we be having sex? What's your number? And I have to say that I don't,

people always kind of measure up. Like I hate saying a number, but what I've found is, it's couples who've been together, you know, for a while, like I'd say over two years, three years, like typically it is. I think a healthy feels like too many couples I hear from is once a week. Now, I know that what happens though is oftentimes, many times, there's one partner that wants more than the other. And that's when we got to compromise, set the alarm earlier in the morning, schedule sex, have a date night,

you know, get creative creative maybe mutual masturbation where you're both getting off morning sex there's ways to work around it so I'm not so that doesn't sound like it like if you're both happy with it right now there's actually not a problem Jessica right yeah I mean does Devin talk to your husband about it yeah I have and I mean I guess we both agree we're like oh we should be having more sex and then we just don't do nothing about it. So I mean, I'm just curious what's the norm? I guess there is no number.

There is no number, but if you feel like, listen, I believe that sex begets sex. And so maybe if you're craving intimacy with your partner, which sounds like maybe there's some kind of, maybe you want more handholding from him, maybe you want some more massage or touching like there's other ways to be intimate, that's not sex. So maybe I'm not sure I'm just kind of reading, maybe there's something more you want, like connection without all the work with sex. And so maybe that's something you talk about with him. Yeah, okay, Jessica.

Yeah, that makes me. All right, well think about it. I'm here every night. See, this is the good news guys. We can just talk for a few minutes, call me back tomorrow. It's like my mom. Mom, we don't have to cover everything today.

You can call me back tomorrow for two minutes, you know? I got it, Jessica. I'm here for you. I'll be here at a mouth. Thanks for calling, Jessica. Like, right, and I don't like goodbyes anyway. Okay, I want to talk to Fernando 49 in Nevada because he's got an update.

Hey, Fernando. Yeah, I'm with you, my lady. Good. How you doing? Um, good. Not too bad. Uh, I had a call maybe about a month, yeah, a month and a half ago, about getting a circumcision done. Right. You were having pain.

I didn't do it because I had no pain. It was just, uh, the skin would and pull back the more. Right. Right. Okay. I had to do a lot of diabetes. So I didn't get that done. Instead, I'm like, you guys have said, I'm going to wait for a second and third opinion coming here towards November and January. Okay. But so I got that taken care of. But my second

question towards that was because also have, you know, ED, how do I go by, because now that I'm, you know, dating again or what, map, and I start to go a little further with the woman, and you know, you can't get, you know, in the reaction, what is the best way to tell a woman that you can't get through that point without, you know, making this enough comfortable or I think that you just so what happens are you not able to get harder you can't stay hard right because it's getting better but you know through the doctor's

but I'm still a ways right right oh that's good so I'm glad you're eating better I think you're just honest you're like you know what sometimes I I don't always stay hard and but I'm here to please you. And I wanna make you feel good. And sometimes you'd be amazed that it comes back because a lot of times I believe that you're having some erectile dysfunction, it happens to men, it gets older,

for many times that's why it happens. It can also happen for anxiety. But for example, if you're focused on her pleasure like our last caller, earlier caller, he was like yeah my penis is I'm working some going down to my wife and now she's having crazy orgasm so I think that women are way more forgiving about their penises than guys are about about your penis than men are about their own penises like we got it we've been there what what is the best

time to tell a woman about that because I've done it before we're kind of you know the first stages are going out and then I don't see them again sometimes right. Yeah. Or I have done it all for you know during that stage and they're like okay it's like a challenge for them. Oh well I think you just got to say you know I think it's good in the moment because listen okay so I've encountered some Flessa penis that didn't say as hard as they'd like in my day and and it's just like we get it Like I feel like I'm like it just happens like oh, yeah, that happens sometimes

But I think you're so hot. Let's just keep going or I'm pleasing you like I just know not to trip on it And I think if you just let them know it's not about them in the moment you're casual about it And you're just like let me please you you know this is this happens sometimes. It's not you, I'm going through stuff. So, I'm just going to stay hard. Nothing to do with you, I think you're so hot. And give them compliments and make them feel good and play with them and that's what's to do for Nitto. But I don't think you got to bring it up at dinner

unless you're like with someone a few times. Like unless like if you haven't slept with them yet, it's what I'm saying. I don't know that you got to bring it up at dinner. Like typically I want people to have conversations at dinner but like in the moment I think these are the kind of things that you're like, oh yeah, yeah, it was what I'm saying. I don't know that you got to bring it up big dinner. Like typically I want people to have conversations at dinner, but like in the moment, I think these are the kind of things that you're like, oh yeah, sometimes, because you don't know Fernando,

maybe you're penis will surprise you and just like show up fully. Like we don't know. Well, Fernando, you never know. So I would just be casual in the moment. Yeah, okay, Fernando, let me know it goes. I'm here for you. Let me know about that second and third opinion. We can talk to Maddie, 28 and you tall. Hey, Maddie, what's your question?

Okay, so I have been dating this guy and every time we try to have sex, he has anxiety with performing and losing his erection, but then not only does he just want to blow off sex altogether, but I'm in the moment, I'm heated, and then he leaves me hanging. And I try talking to him about it, and he just wants to put it on the back burner. Yeah, how long have you been with him? Like a year. Okay.

Yeah, he just doesn't, I mean, it sounds like he doesn't really have that understanding yet that sex is reciprocal, and he probably doesn't really have that understanding yet that sex is reciprocal. And he probably doesn't really understand female pleasure and why that's important. You know what I mean? So that's what sounds like to me unless he's just like, and he's also probably really, really embarrassed, right? Like, that he's not. Yeah, no, for sure.

Like, he, like, he can get hard, but then, like, it's kissing this problem. Like, he's such a good kisser, but like, when it comes kissing this problem like you such a good chester but like when it comes to the sex it heals they hard just for a few minutes and then it's like he gets excited about like ejaculating and he just yeah and then it kills it and then he like shuts off. Has it was a good at the beginning? It's been a year. How was it in the beginning? Because a year is kind of still the beginning. Since the first time? How many years, how was it in the beginning? Because a year is kind of still the beginning. It didn't like this.

Since the first time. Yeah. Okay, so Maddie, here's a thing. 28 years old, this has been happening to him his entire life. This is something that he's going to. It's anxiety. Here's the good news about a lot of the challenges

been around their penis is that a lot of it is in their head. He's healthy, 28 year old. It probably, he was probably prematurely ejaculated. Now he's turned it into erectile dysfunction. He said, he gets soft again. We can't say hard, which, right. So he will get hard and then it gets soft real fast. So yeah, he's almost like, I mean, he's almost like, I'm trying to think about it.

He's been a premature ejaculator, but he's so terrified of that that he's now made a erectile dysfunction. He's turned his, it's what I'm thinking, but I feel like he's got to do this anxiety and for a lot of people, CBD has been helpful. He sounds like, you know, encouraging him, they letting him know that it's okay, you know, going down in a McGinning even when he's soft and like, maybe you get hard again. That happens, letting you know it's bad. And he actually just gets mad. Like, we haven't had sex. We probably had sex maybe three times, and it's chillin' me.

Three times in a year. Maddie, you're 28 years old. You've had sex three times in your own every time. You've not been satisfied, and he hasn't stayed hard. You could work with this guy, but it's going to take a lot of work. He's going to have to do his work on his own. Or you can encourage him. Listen, there's a lot of things man can do for this. We talk about it all the time, but like you'd have to be the one guiding him through it.

Like he needs to do his keg exercises. He needs to meditate. He needs to, you know, breathe deeply and realize that like unlearn all this other stuff that he's the patterning that he's learned, maybe from childhood because he was told it wasn't okay to masturbate, and then he had to do it really quickly in the bathroom, and then he was a premature ejaculator, but now he made himself in a wreck,

now he has a wrecked all this function, like it's a whole thing. And so it's not new, and it's not that he's a bad guy, he's terribly embarrassed, doesn't want to do about it, there's nowhere to go, no one to talk to, and that's where you're at. So you can listen to the show together, you can tell me you'd like to help them, but you know, so have you been listening for a while, we've got lots of podcasts and shows,

we talk about all the time, but that's what you're in for, Maddie. If you want to do the work, but he has to want to do the work, and the first thing I do is you got to talk about it, and if he's just getting mad at you, this is the part I'm like, because he doesn't do what is anger and embarrassment. So, Maddie, that's what you got there. Okay? Let me know what you want to do. I'll be here, have him call in, he can talk to me.

I got you, girl. Thanks for calling, Maddie. Seriously, I mean, when he gets the boy, what else is he going to do? Thanks, Maddie, thanks for calling. Like literally, what else is he, because I was in that situation, and I believe that one of the things that led me to start this show was that I've talked about Like I felt like sex could be so much better and that all of my sexual experiences were good But not amazing and I was like what is amazing sex mean?

But I did have a boyfriend for two years that was a premature Deculator and this is before like this is my 20s and so but I was like oh I I remember we've got this book together um and We he was supposed to read it and do the exercises and he did it and I was like and I didn't know how to help him and then he was like oh maybe it's the marijuana maybe it's a key to solve these things. But all I know is that for two and at two and every years it never got better.

Did he please you though? Yes. He did please me. So that was fun but it was like it was never got better than a minute. All right let's talk to PJ. He's 29 in New York. Hi PJ, thanks for calling. Hi Dr. Emily, how are you doing?

I'm good, thanks. How can I help you PJ? Awesome. Hey, so, first time call or so. Welcome. Pretty good, never too bad, but also excited. Just one quick brief thing, I met a girl a couple of weeks ago off of one of the dating apps and been talking to her, been pretty cool, but conversations always go a little deeper each time, so I'm pretty excited about that, but

when the whole, and we've actually met up a couple of times, it's been pretty good, like little small dates, but the whole sexual conversation came up like how active are we things of that nature and I got the vibes from her that she's not really looking for a relationship relationship she's looking for something a little bit more fluid okay and what's concerned in friends with benefits I've never done one of those no I don't know how to approach her about this I don't know how to like move forward with it. Hmm. Great question, PJ.

I'm going to ask you a question. Well, let's, okay, this is a great question. So, PJ, I got to, I want to ask you a few questions. So, first off, are you certain that she wants a friend with benefits like, like does she say those words? Or you're just sensing that it sounds like she wants something fluid? Because let's try to figure out first, what did she say exactly?

Well, I'm sensing it number one I didn't come up with those words but she she made it clear that when she wants to get her satisfaction she has certain people for it but that these were her words but she wants to like do something with me in that sense also she, so she said to you, PJ, I'm into you. So she said to you, I've got a few people I hook up with, but you could be a contender. She kind of said that. Yeah.

All right. So I think that what you should say to her is, I keep thinking about what you know, I thought that what you said, and I'm down, like I'm attracted to you, I think we should, you know, we try to make this work. And I think how that works is, and here's the other thing, there's not like a rule, like here's how friends

with benefits go, and here's how open relationships go, but what they all have in common, though, no matter what it is, is you communicate a lot, and you talk about boundaries. Like you can ask her, I would ask more questions, PJ and Sam definitely attracted to you, but tell me more about your, what do you envision? Because I think she might say,

well, with my friends with benefits or with these guys I see, I see each one once a month or once a week. Because for some people, you have to be careful because it becomes a relationship. If you're seeing them three times in a week, then you're like, okay, that's my boyfriend now. So you can find out a little bit more from her,

how it works, what she's into, like safe sex is important. Obviously you're gonna use condoms, PJ. And so I feel like how you approach it is just letting her know that you're interested. You're interested, you wonder, it sounds like she wants something fluid, but you know, you'd be into that as well. And then I, yeah, I think just in the ass,

I'm curious about that. I've never been in that situation, but I find you attractive. So that's... That is. Yeah, I've always been, I, like I said, I've never done a friends of benefit situation that's always been like,

I'm either with a girl or it's just like a one-act stand type thing, it's the extremes. You know, it's never been something where it's like a little bit centered like that, where it's a little bit more free. So I've always worried about like, you know, boundaries. I've always worried about things of that, like definitions of all. But that's still important. So also just make sure, just because you find her attractive,

that A, this is really what you want, because it's not for everybody. Because what if you start to develop feelings for her, but what happens is you'll just talk about it. You have to just, you know, what you you start to develop feelings for her, but what happens is you'll just talk about it. You have to just, you know, what you'd like to see in boundaries. And I guess this will be great for you to try it out as well. Because maybe you'll start liking her and she'll make it to only once a month. And then you'll feel like, well, let's, I see her once a month, but now I'm thinking

about her and actually really like her, but she doesn't want that now, so I'm going to have to bail. Like find out, like you probably still be dating other people. You know know does she want to know about that do you want to know about who she's dating so I think this could be a really interesting conversation because really it's just about asking questions and being curious and then seeing how it goes down so yeah I'm looking forward to the conversation to P.J. we call me back and let me

now goes and then we can work out the next steps. You got it, got it. Thank you so much. PJ. Yeah, we'll hear it. We got you. Thank you all for your support of the show, heading into this 15th year. I love when you review us, wherever you listen to it, whatever app you're listening on, it helps to give us five stars.

We also do three shows a week, so that helps as well. And if you're listening, and iTunes really helps to also leave a comment. Thanks everyone for listening. Thanks to my awesome team, Ken, Kristen, Alisa, Brian, our interns, producer, Jamie, and Michael. Was it good for you? Email me. FeedbackItSexWithEmily.com. you