Sex With Emily - Pleasure to the Pelvic Power with Lauren Roxburgh

Episode Date: May 10, 2019

On today’s show, Emily is joined by best-selling author & body alignment expert, trainer, and speaker Lauren Roxburgh to talk about her new book, The Power Source, and how you can really release the power from your pelvic floor. They discuss how everything is connected to your pelvic floor – not just for women but EVERYONE, tips on how to loosen up and have better sex, what the heck fascia is and why it’s so important, and how to breathe in a way that connects your mind, body & soul. Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep the show FREE: Boston Scientific, Audible, Uberlube, Promescent. Follow Emily on all social: @sexwithemily For even more sex talk, tips, & tricks visit sexwithemily.com For more info on Lauren Roxburgh, click HERE.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. On today's show, I'm joined by bestselling author and body alignment expert trainer, speaker Lauren Roxbar, to talk about her new book, The Power Source. Oh, it's a good one. And how you can really release the power from your pelvic floor. This is for men and for women. Topics include, why being tight can actually be a bad thing and ways to loosen up for better sex. What the heck is fascia and why is it so important that we know what it is and how to keep it healthy? How to breathe into your body in a way that connects your mind, body, and soul

to feel even more pleasure and we do an exercise with you. And how everything, everything is connected to your pelvic floor, which is why I talk about it so much for men, for women, for all of you, and knowing this information how connected everything is, I really think this show is gonna change the way you think about it and change your life.

All this and more, thanks for listening. 6. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Betrubized, they call them in a fight on day. Hey, Avaline, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got a hair stand. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common, Avaline? What do you mean, like, laundry? It's shrink?

Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm off here, I'm so broke. Being bad feels pretty good. But you know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. For more information check out sexthelmy.com, all the awesome posts and blogs and things

we have there to help you have better sex. Catch me Monday through Friday, 5- 7 PM Pacific on Series XM. It stars Channel 109. God, I love doing the show. You guys should check it out. You can get a free 30 day trial at sexcellamy.com sash. SX as always, we are everywhere at Sex of Emily and all the social media across the board.

And I hope you guys love this interview with Lauren. She, she's an amazing woman. And I really think she is changing lives, changing sex lives, and we're doing a giveaway which is pretty generous and amazing and after you listen you're going to want to enter for sure. So check this out, go to Instagram, follow sex with Emily, find the power source post, like it, tag a friend who could use this and then follow at low Roxboro. That's L-O-R-O-X-B-U-R-G-H. We're giving away a few books and her kits that she makes. They literally open up

your entire pelvic floor. They change the way you move in the world. I'm just telling you that. Wait to hear more. You're gonna love the show. Lauren Roxboro, we met at a party. And all of our friends were like, how do you two not know each other? I don't understand. Then I read her book, The Power Source. We had the chance to meet

and you have to hear about Lauren. She believes the pelvic floor is the foundation of mental and physical health and impacts everything from our daily body mechanics to our nervous system. She's a celebrity body worker, trainer, author known as the body whisperer and go to expert at all things fascia. We're going to get into fashion while we don't know about it and why you should. Alignment, movement,

foam rolling, and essentially her book is called The Power Source. The hidden key to ignite your core, empower your body, release stress, and re- realign your life. And this book is coming out just in a few days. It's coming out May 14th. And I'm telling you, very rarely do we have a book like someone coming in and we've all read it in the office. I'm sitting around four women. And they're like, oh my god, why doesn't everyone know this?

How did she know this? Everyone does have so many questions because it's truly about you guys know that I'm all about, you know, we talk a lot about how women are so disconnected from our bodies and how it really is the power source of what's happening, but yet we all want to have great sex and sensuality, but there's a lot of things blocking us from that.

And I believe that Lauren has discovered many of the ways to unleash what is blocked within us to have a healthier life overall. Lauren, welcome to the show. Oh my gosh, that was amazing. Literally, I'm so and all and so grateful to be here. And this is such an honor and I'm so excited to share this and it makes me so happy that everyone here has read the book.

Yeah, exactly. I came into power. Yeah, right? We did a session at my house. And I didn't really know what it was gonna be. You're like, we're work out clothes. And I was like, okay. And then we went through a session.

And then I came and we're gonna go back to that. And I was like, you don't understand. Like, I couldn't even really explain it to Jamie. But I was like, it was just, I feel better. And she does these things and you guys, when you get to it, because there's a few months ago. And now they've all right, and we're all caught off. So, let's talk about your journey to figure out the power source and what you do, your

whole story. Oh, I love it. Okay, so I was when I was 16 years old, my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer, and that put me on a path to basically go with her to the doctor to Stanford University and get her treatments since she was getting chemo every week, which was like crazy for a whole day, just putting poison in your body. And I kept asking the doctors,

so where does cancer come from? What is this all about? And they kept saying, well, you know, it's genetics and it's environmental, and then we don't really know. Because we didn't have cancer in our family, it wasn't genetic anyway. So I knew there was something more in my gut, in my instinct, I knew there was something more to learn.

And so I decided to put myself on a path at a very young age to learn about holistic health and healing. And my mom always read Deepak Chopra and all those amazing like Wayne Dyer and you know, Mary and Williamson and all the, you know, empowerment self-help books essentially. And that kind of put me on the journey to really studying the body, mind, spirit, and heart. So I looked at, we looked at my mom's life and my father had just left her, they were getting divorced. And she was heartbroken. So she had a lot of resentment and she was a victim and she was holding a lot of that in her heart area, which is breast cancer in many ways. And many were finding out

this more and more now in this day and age that many diseases are from emotional imbalances. I mean, some people would say between 95 and 99% of them are. I believe that. Because it weakens the immune system. When the immune system is weakened, that's when disease takes over the body. Right. And if we are stressed, we don't have to resist emotions.

And our body can't heal a full stress. If we're in fight or flight all the time. We're constantly just trying to survive rather than thrive. So I was lucky enough at that age too. And my mother did live another 16 years. So we were able to have that time together and she saw me like grow and learn and you know explore all these different modalities. And I was a competitive athlete. I was an all-american swimmer. I played water polo at UC Santa Barbara. I was very like pushing through, making it happen. A lot about force.

And then I realized in my 20s, as I studied different modalities, like Raky, Taiyoga massage, Pilates, started looking at the mind-body connection. And then I discovered something called structural integration, which is all about fascia. And that was the system that just like turned my life around And then I discovered something called structural integration, which is all about fascia. And that was the system that just like turned my life around completely and turns out that structural integration is developed by a woman named Ida Rolf.

And Ida Rolf was a rocket scientist in the 1960s and she studied how the human body related to gravity. And in her studies, she discovered fascia. And it wasn't until 2007 that the medical community actually said, oh my gosh, wait, fascia and it wasn't until 2007 that the medical community actually said oh my gosh Wait fascia is actually something we're not gonna do dissections anymore and throw away the fascia the connective tissue while we're you know dissecting cadavers So you can just me and away. I know it's like food away It would go away and now we're realizing that this is like this incredible like second skin

It's our sensory organ. it's where we feel everything, it's where our nerves lay, it's where our lymph nodes are. It's such a powerful part of the body that was disregarded until basically 2007. But in the holistic world, since the 60s, it's been a real big thing. In the healing world, osteopathy, many different modalities, I mean, even massage deals with fascia, connective tissue.

And so for me, when I discovered that work and started doing that work, it was a two-year program. I was actually in a really unhealthy marriage. And my mom was actually very sick again for the second time. So I was able, when I went through this program, it was a two-year program to learn structural integration. I was able to basically I went through this program, it was a two-year program to learn instruction integration, I was able to basically go through my own perfect storm to come out on the other side

to be able to teach this stuff. We can't teach something unless we embody it. Exactly. Right? We have to practice what we preach. Oh my gosh, exactly. That's why I say you're never, and you're never really done. In some ways, but you have to do the work,

and you've been through it. Oh, yeah. Right. So you, so you, that was the pivotal time. So that two years, you had to break down before you could, I would say, I've broken down the perfectly. I was like, I'm not sure if I could find it. Yeah, we're falling, I feel like when we're falling apart,

it really means we're falling together. I remember therapists told me that once. I was like, I'm falling apart. She's like, just made you fall in together. And I was like, oh, yes. You know what it's true. You got to dismantle something to put it back. And what you talk about your book and when your stories

are so powerful. I think we all relate to it. I think any woman who reads this could feel a part of themselves in you because we all have this striving, masculine energy that's pushing, forcing, trying to be a swimmer. I was a marathon runner. Oh my gosh. I was going, achieving, doing, doing, doing. And my body hurt my knee, like all that compression and the contracting and the, and so you learn through structural integration is that, that you were not, that

you were sort of tightened and all these are your pelvic floor. Yeah, and also, so pelvic floor is one side of it. You have the cranial sacral connection, the pelvic floor to the head, essentially the jaw to the pelvic floor. It's this crazy connection between those two points in the body because that's where the nervous system lies and that's where your spinal cord is and your cerebral spinal fluid, which is in, you know, it goes up and down your spine. That basically is what regulates all of our hormones, all of our glands. It regulates how we respond to stress. It regulates

how we digest. It regulates how we sleep. I mean, all of those things are affected by that system and it's basically another almost lymphatic system within the spinal cord. If that is blocked or constantly on that adrenal fatigue, push, push, go, go, go, force, force, force, your body never has the opportunity to rest, digest, heal, and rejuvenate. Many people in our society and the Western society are living that way. And so it's nearly impossible to have good sex if you're constantly in your head. That's one of the biggest questions I can, the top questions I could ask. How do I get

out of my head into my body or I have pain during sex or I never have orgasms during sex or you know, all the things, it's amazing to me and most women don't even want to take a look at their their vaginas Their volvas take a part of their body that they they're very confused by and they expect well I should just be ready for action when my partner is but then they don't know why it doesn't work It's all or nothing right? It's either we don't have one or it's porn right so we and now there's this all this in between area Where we could be exploring and experimenting and feeling more. I mean, like what I think my whole message really is is about feeling again and feeling

is about being and connecting and, you know, sensuality and within the facial system, like I was saying earlier, it is the sensory organ. So if we can just drop it down, feel our bodies again, feel the messages it has for us, like the butterflies in your stomach or when the weight of the world comes on your shoulders or when that takes your breath away, when something takes your breath away. Or when you feel that sensation of resentment or fear, all of those things are healthy. It's just a matter of them getting stuck in the system.

And if they get stuck is when it stops and contracts us and builds this armor that we wear, our fascia turns into armor, thick, hard, dense. Like literally can make you fatter, can make you have more weight on your body, can slow down your metabolism, makes it harder to breathe deeper if your fascia is really glued and dense and tight. I took a deep breath and you said that.

I mean breath is huge, yeah. It's so massive. I mean, so this, and so this starts to happen at a young age, even, right? It could happen like if you have trauma, like I've been going through this trauma therapy, like I've had stuff and this is just like a personal thing that's happened. But I was, you know, parents got divorced. It was traumatic, you know, bad stepdad and then my dad died.

I was 19. So I would have therapy for all these things and things get, and I know this, like I've lived a lot in fighter flight mode. I've lived a lot in fighter flight mode I've lived a lot in that place where and I've done grounding work in yoga and meditation, but it still feels like You know not enough. Yeah, and I think that people can relate in a bigger small scale to having stuff that's happened in our lives We just don't know how to deal with it. So it's resentment in the moment to look to in the moment learning But then the old shit that still stored. Yeah, so all that is awareness, and then changing the perception and the perspective

and reframing it as opposed to going, why did that happen to me? Right, enough with the talking about it, right? Right, and go, you know what? That is part of me, and it's why I am who I am. So instead of fighting it and pushing it away, integrating it into acceptance, that we know one is perfect, that we are all going through this,

I like to call it Earth School. That's Carolyn Mace. Carolyn Mace. Carolyn Mace, who I'm obsessed with. Me too. Okay, back up for a second. Yeah, I mentioned she fell off the book. She was one of my first, I had all her cassette tapes.

Of course, Emily, I love it. Of course, she was one of the first in that I made this spirit. Yes, I would listen to him on repeat because it was so, but I Emily, I love it. Of course. She was one of the first men to be a disparate. Yes. I would listen to him on repeat because it was so, but I didn't even get it. We're talking like the 90s, but it totally spoke to me. She was one of the first. Me too. I've forgotten about it because I hadn't listened a while, but it's, yeah, I didn't understand

energy then. I didn't think a lot of people to them. It's like, huh, what? I don't really, I don't really get it. So So I just taught a class over the weekend at the Blackberry Mountain with Goop and I did a class and there were men and women in the class and we did a little pre-test to see their hamstring flexibility. I mean, it comes down to these things too because every man is so tight. So tight in their hamstring, so tight in their pelvic floor.

It's very, you know, it's a lot about control. I mean, that's what it is, right? It's squeezing, clutching, white knuckle, and pushing our way through life. And so that bearing down and that contracting energy is okay as long as you have the opposite to balance it out. It's that yin and the yang. You need to have the bean with the doing. You need to have the expansion with the contraction.

Like, expansion, I think, is what our society is really missing. So I was teaching the class, and these men, there was probably about five men in the class, and they could not believe, after we did the pelvic floor work by sitting on the ball, and opening up the rotations, and the hamstrings and the hips, and rolling the sides of the hips, and the lower back, and the pelvis, and the belly rolling, is phenomenal.

Calm's a nervous system now, and it's out of control, amazing, and they all could go way further than touching their toes. belly rolling is like phenomenal, calms the nervous system down. It's out of control, amazing. And they all could go way further than touching their toes. They were like blown away. And like the thing that I love about this work is it's literally instantaneous. Like you feel it. We're gonna give some a way too.

So if you get excited, you can check that we'll give you information after. But she has something called the aligned tribe. And I go log into her site and I was like, I'm going to Mexico by myself Lauren. And I'm just going to get into my body. I remember Michelle was overhelp me pack. I was like, I'm going to Mexico by myself, Lauren. And I'm just going to get into my body. I remember Michelle was over, helped me pack. I'm like, I'm bringing all her.

She's a foam roller, the dome, the half dome. What's called the? Yeah. The Aligned dome. The Aligned dome. The body sphere is the swiss ball. That's the one you use for the belly. You can really massage the organs and the pelvic floor. So yeah, it's out of this world.

It is out of this world release. Like I am looking for, I've tried everything and I've had the lower back problem for about a year now and it's like a slip disc and it's probably just for years of maybe, who knows, not being aligned, clutching my pelvic floor, it could be trauma. That's why I brought the emotions in my body. It could be the way I was walking.

It could be a million, and it probably, it's all the things. It's all the above. It's all the above, yeah, it's all the above. It's literally all the above. It's trauma, it's our emotions from childhood. It's because I was in spinning class probably not holding my body correctly. I've always favored it my left over my right.

There's a lot of things. And I've been trying to go, I've gone to a pelvic floor physical therapist. I've gone to regular physical therapy. I've gone to Pilates. And then we met, she brings me, I took that stuff to Mexico, I took the three things to Mexico, I'm like, I'll find, I'll bring less dresses

and more of Lauren's stuff in my suitcase. And I'm telling you, so I got there, the first thing I did, I unpacked, and I was like, okay, I had the worst, because I flew to Mexico and then in my back, like it just, I've been, flying is really hard on the human body. And I felt, yeah, it was so bad,

but I even felt worse, because like, you know before you go on vacation, and then you're like, all, I'm in my back. Like, it just, I've been flying is really hard on the human body. And I felt like, yeah, it was so bad, but I even felt worse because like, you know before you go on vacation and then you're like, all, I'm trying to get everything done because I fell in double stress. Totally. And so I like, I like, I fired up my, the way your website, I got the login, I like had the ball and I rolled on it

and I did it for like an hour and I watched you and you're, I just, just so relaxing. I think I took notes because you said something that blew me away because I'm really into massage when they kicked my, like I want them to be like she adds you all my pressure points really hard and what you said was if doing this kind of work is almost more effective than getting massage because we're active rather than being passive. Yeah, because you get the neuromuscular connections to your pattern.

That's massive. I was like, oh my god, this does feel it. If you guys all know, I have my favorite misuse in Mexico. So that was a big part of my trip. But I was like, this feels, I felt, I got up, I did the roller, I did the ball, and I was like, oh, it was instantaneous.

Yeah, you really feel it right. It was amazing to me. I was like, oh, and then I had your face there. Like you're with me. Oh, I love it. I know. It was amazing. And so that was my experience when using the exercises in Mexico. And then I had your face there like you missed me. Oh, I love it. I know. It was amazing.

And so that was my experience when using the exercises in Mexico. But let's back up to like how you learn this working with others. Like you came to my house and we had, you've had two sessions. Yes. But I wouldn't even know how to explain what you did. My back felt better after. And you did the fascia adjustment. You watched me walk.

Let's explain that process. Yes. Okay. So basically what it comes down to, I always say, align your body, align your life. So essentially, the human structure, because we're covered in fascia, and it also wraps on each individual muscle. We basically have this scaffolding that holds us up, and it has a memory in a way. So it sort of remembers these postures in the way we sit in our car and lean to one side and like, yeah, exactly.

That's what you're all over. Yeah. Um, so the fascia, and then if you go to sleep at night, you don't stretch that out. It's like you're going to even memorize it even more when you're sleeping. And then if you don't get up in the morning and stretch and expand and free that stuff up, then the emotions get lodged in the fascia. But then you're also going to, your tissue is going to remember and just keep patterning you. You know, you see someone gonna remember and just keep patterning you

You know you see someone that's like 90 years old or 80 years old walking down the street and they have that hunchback That is actually fascia that's become thick dense and plasticized and it's totally preventable Because fascia is so incredibly malleable and so responsive that all it really needs is it needs breath work It needs breath. It needs movement, it needs space, it needs hydration. So fascia basically the way we keep it healthy and supple and youthful is and rejuvenated is through compression. And that rings out the tissue.

So that's why when you get on the roller or you stretch or you breathe, you're creating that elasticity. So you're stretching it when you breathe or doing any kind of facial stretches. But the thing that happens in traditional movement, like yoga or, you know, a lot of the workouts out there, as you're doing a lot of the same patterns over and over again. So you're not going into these spaces like the pelvic floor where the muscles attach to the joints. So my new tools and the book really talks about going in and clearing the cobwebs where the muscles attach to the joints and that's why the spiky dome is so great because you can flush your lips and stuff.

I love the spiky dome. It's like immediately like laying on it. You guys, the spiky dome is so cool. It's like all of this world too. It's like, yeah. Cause then I got sick in Mexico and that, cause of your stuff and I literally would just lay on it and bed cause you said I could do that.

I'm just really lazy. It's like, I keep up. I'm sure, but I'm gonna press. I'm gonna press. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. And that, okay, so that brings up another point

that's super important to talk about. And I kind of mentioned it earlier, but is the nervous system. So the nervous system, I feel like people kind of are like, what is that? I don't know. So I love to explain this in my teaching because it really just like clicks for people.

So essentially, there's two states of the nervous system. There's the sympathetic state, which is the doing state, you know, getting it done, forcing it, making it happen. Essentially it's the fight or flight state. Like I'm going to run away. Okay. I'm going to fight for life.

But many people are living in that state because that's the way that our DNA is sort of designed to react and respond when we feel stressed. And so the other state is the parasympathetic state and that's the state of rest digest, rejuvenate, heal, and that's where our body can actually slow down and be calm. And so our systems are the aging happens in fight or flight. So we want to be in rest and digest. So we want to be in the parasymp fight or flight. So we wanna be in rest and digest. So we wanna be in the parasympathetic state.

More than the others. Yeah, so by doing anything with the facial system, you're gonna bring your body into the parasympathetic state. So whether it's rolling, using the dome, using the body sphere, but what I actually love about the body sphere, which goes with the power source book, is you can actually self-massage the belly, the organs, which is like where the vagus nerve is.

So the vagus nerve connects from the belly to the brain. And as soon as you roll that area or massage that area, it drops you into the constate. Yeah, exactly. Without even trying. You don't have to do anything. Exactly. You just get to be... You just get to be...

Exactly. What I did, I did the rolling, you You said Emily, just try this and you showed me. I rolled on the ball when I got there and I instantly, you feel it release. So it's like, yeah, it releases the lower back, that belly rolling. Yes. It completely aligns the pelvis. It takes that stress out of the belly

because people, I mean, a gut stuff, by the way, is a massive thing right now in the younger generation. There's a lot of autoimmune stuff. Let's talk about belly stuff. Yeah. And so it gots like the second brain. Like everyone's like, how do we have all these body parts of people are just now?

I know. It's a kale, right? Kale's been out forever. And then I was like, everyone's into kale. But now it's like, our gut and fascia. So what's going on? Well, okay. So, and then bringing back to the pelvic floor.

Yeah. The gut and the pelvic floor are directly connected. Because if you have a squeezed up white, knuckle-in clutched pelvic floor, which most because if you have a squeezed up white knuckling clutched pelvic floor, which most people don't realize they have it because it's subconscious, then guess what? Your organs are also going to be that way as well because if anything is squeezed compressed or dense or thick or tight or contracted, then it's going to pull everything else above

together as well. And the other thing too is we forget that our organs are wrapped in fascia as well. So if our pelvic floor is tight, our organs can't drop down into the base of our core. I mean, our pelvic floor is there essentially to not let our organs fall out of our body. Right, exactly, like let's, right.

So it's, I mean, it's completely like, if you don't deal with that, both of those areas, then you're missing the ability to really feel and enjoy pleasure and also feel that instinct. Like you said, you said the second rain. It's instinct, yes. And many people are so out of touch with that because they're too cerebral. So they're too in their mind. And that's another reason why many people can't enjoy pleasure or connection or intimacy

because they're so wound up and many people don't even realize it's so subconscious. Well, this is what I was thinking when I was reading it and I love the clutch. I love that you started out with like everyone's clutching their pelvic floor and I thought, I don't even need you to come over and tell me that I'm likely clutching. Like, I know that I walk around and stress and try to release it, but I'm like, I think how would people know? Well, I mean, well, if you have any lower back pain, if you have incontinence, if you have trouble,

like, enjoying sex, if you have trouble having an orgasm, if you feel like tightness in your hamstrings, if you feel like you have not such good posture, if you feel like you can't take a deep breath, because the diaphragm is directly related to the pelvic floor as well. So, the inability. I know. Anxiety. Anxiety. Depression. I mean, it's all connected because it's nervous system energy too. So that's why it's so interesting because the book has the five power centers, which basically

I look at areas where yeah. So I look at it like we have these areas and this is again going back to kind of my practice and I've been working with people hands on for about 20 years. And I've been seeing a lot of these patterns show up. And I wrote an article a few years ago on Goop that was called Distress Containers. And it was where I set, I said I kept feeling these density in the tissue. And it was the areas where the pelvic floor, the guts and the lower back. Few years of work, right? My hands on work. So I guess I like to call it like being in the lab.

Like it's like case studies, feeling this and then feeling the same stuff come up over and over again. There was pelvic floor, belly got lower back and then the diaphragm lungs, which by the way seems so random. But like the diaphragm is the muscle that's responsible for taking our oxygen in and flushing the CO2 out. So can you imagine how important that is when dealing with stress? Right. It's incredible. Right. And also anxiety and stepping into our personal power.

This is like where we, and then you'll notice someone will walk into a room that will be hunched over. You can tell like the way the world is on their shoulders. They have anxiety. Right. You can talk to Josh. Yes, Bob. Exactly. Which is massive. I'm a big fan of that.

Yes. I like studying people's bodies and the way they move and express themselves and stuff like that. So then you have the diaphragm lungs and then you have the heart and shoulders, which people are always like, oh, I have not some my shoulders. What is that about? And I'm like, well, usually it's from hunched over posture because your tissues in the back are being pulled on and then the scar tissue builds up to sort of hold you up

in gravity. So the heart and the heart is obviously like, you know, giving and receiving love and you know, we hold a lot of resentment in this area and the armpits and like the victim hood. Is that the deep core, the upper core? That will. So we have five power centers in front of me. Yes, thank you. So we have the pelvic floor, then we have the deep core, then we have the upper core. That will. So we have five power centers in front of me. Yes, thank you.

So we have the pelvic floor, then we have the deep core, then we have the upper core, then we have the heart and shoulders, and then the head, neck and jaw, and the throat, and that's where swallowed emotions get lodged. In our jaw. In our jaw and our throat area, which, you know, again, emotions are not bad. They're amazing. We need to have them. We want to feel them.

It's just a matter of letting them flow out. And that's why I created something called movement medicine, which I didn't make that word up, but I just think it resonates with people. And that's why I have the whole online platform to offer people all these different ways of moving and freeing up this energy. And we need it more now than ever in our society. Well, that's the amazing things. So in your 20 years of studying it, then this book, like, congratulations, because this is really the book that is going to heal. You don't have to see Lauren. I'm lucky I get to, if you've been to there and see her, but you don't even have to. Yeah. If they buy the book, presale, and we're going to extend it past, they will

get free access to the studio for a month. Okay. You guys, then just do that. Just do that. Just do that. Presale campaign. and the website is power source book dot com perfect yeah power source book dot com all right we're going to take a quick break and we come back even more Lauren. So these five different areas the five power centers and you're like finding your own super power I just love the way it's just so easy to read and so easy to navigate. Let's talk about, I guess, the deep core is more of like where our sensual, I mean, it's all related, but that's the sensuality.

The sensuality. Deep core and pelvic floor, again, directly connected for sure. I mean, they're all connected, but if you don't get to the pelvic floor, the root of it all, then all the other ones are going to stay kind of tight and stagnant and blocked. So you've got to start from the bottom and work the way up. That's the way I look at it. If people are open to it, it's definitely an area of the body that, first of all, wasn't

really even touched, even in physical therapy until a few years ago. That's why I just discovered the physical distance. Yeah, which is amazing, by the way. Let's just like cheer that on. Like, yeah, we actually have these amazing things that we can do to look after that part of our body, whether it's like getting a pelvic floor therapist or, you know, those treatments they do now. It's incredible.

Yeah. But the bottom line is turning on the neuromuscular connection from the brain to the body and reawakening that part. That's the thing. And so by sitting on the sphere, you have this sensory connection. You know how they say how powerful like touches. So if you're just touched in that area, you know, you wrap your sitz bones around over the ball and you just kind of sit on it. Like you would like if you were sitting in a yoga pose or meditation pose, and all of a sudden, you can feel that circular hammock of muscles. Okay, so most of the time our pelvic floor is concentric, which is, you know, clushing, okay?

So it's a hammock of muscles is clushing inward. The only way we can really create eccentric length, which is what it needs. It doesn't need to be, people are always like, oh, you want to tight pelvic floor. I'm like, no. You want a resilient pelvic floor. You want a pelvic floor that can expand and contract. And that's when you actually start, like in sex,

that's when you can really affect, I mean, if you're having like, yes, heterosexual sex, and you want to do the kegol while you're having sex, you want to be able to open it and tighten it. Because the other thing that's really interesting and I think your audience would totally love this is that the constant contraction is actually going to weaken it.

It's called hypertonic. So it's going to, it's just going to make it tighter, weaker, stuck. It's really about creating that length, and then you'll be stronger. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more.

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You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. You'll tighten it more. right? And that's the thing a lot of these apps out there and everything are about more squeezy. But really we need and the way we can open it is by sitting on the sphere, by doing deep squats, by getting in and you know opening up the rotations, and the hamstrings, and the inner thighs, and because it's all connected, even the feet are connected to the pelvic floor. It's crazy. They're always saying like yeah, feet on the ground spread out your toes, like in yoga, and it really does work. It does.

So let's talk about it in your 20 years in your lab with all the women that you work with. What? I'm men. And men, and men. And men, okay, so I'm, so it's the women. Oh, pro athletes are obsessed with this work

because they can jump higher. They're more quick, like they're more dynamic. They have a quicker reaction. They're more connected to their core. I mean, there's so many benefits to this work that it's just like, it's basically like- And anyone else doing it? I don't even know.

I don't even care about that in the fair, but I feel like it's the only one. But I have never heard about all this. I mean, we're all piecing it together now. But what if you heard back from then about their sex life? I'm sure they're like, oh, Lauren, it's so happy. Tell me what kind of things from opening up. I can only imagine

that we're telling ourselves that it's so many other problems, but really it could just be that we're clutched and you've helped them. Yeah, well first of all, there's so many layers to that question I love that question because I feel so excited about awakening this area of the body. So the first layer is when you learn to let go of the control and be a little bit more and be less in the force and more in the flow, all of a sudden, your life is more fun and more enjoyable. So that's number one, right? That's the first step. Like, I can take a deep breath and I can enjoy this instead of always like, what's the next thing? Where am I off to next? Always thinking of what's next rather than being, I mean, God, we all work? Where am I off to next? Always thinking of what's next rather than being,

I mean, God, we all work so hard, we gotta enjoy our lives and our bodies. It's hard. And then awakening that, I know, awakening the sensuality, the feeling again. So feeling those parts of their body and the neuromuscular connections. And then obviously like the big one is,

a lot of the husbands love me for the wives because they're like, oh my God, my wife wants to have sex again. She's awoken in that area. She's a love energy thing, right? Exactly. It's like, she is no longer either feeling not confident down there, feeling either too tight or even in pain.

I mean, some women post baby or even without post baby have, it hurts to have sex. Yes. Because they're so tight. Right, and it could have started as a child to have emotions, it hurts to have sex. Yes. Because they're so tight. Right, and it could have started as a child. They had motions of big tech. Exactly. Like people who have... The reactive states.

Yeah, vaginismists are all the other things that people women have that are troubling, that they have pain so much. Absolutely. And I'd often say, go to a public floor physical therapist, you're going to college, just might not recognize it, like, figured out, but this would be another way that I think I'm sure a lot of women with pain have been... Oh, at with pain have been released on their pain. Oh, yeah, big time. And so it's just and then it's just like embodying that or like really awakening this part of their body that they didn't even realize was there for them and realizing that it's a part of their strength in their core and then kind of reframing the whole

thing and not being like in this Puritan sort of uptight, stick up our ass like culture and being like wow like look at how other cultures walk and move like in Brazil they move their hips side to side in Africa like that's the way our body is supposed to move. And we're just still pretty tight here. So uptight like if you I mean I've studied it even in like the subways and stuff like in the western world especially in New York City and like you are you can just see like there's no movement in the subways and stuff like in the Western world especially in New York City and you can just see there's no movement in the hips. It's just like a rock. People are just, I mean, so that's why men have a lot of pre-mature

or ejaculation because they're so tight there. So then all of a sudden they get some friction and it's like, boom, they have no control. Wow, never. It makes so much sense. It makes so much sense that that would be part of the problem for men. Because I always say like a lot of what I do when people call in the asking questions, it's mind stuff and it was like relax, be more mindful during sex, be more, get into your

body, feel your senses, you know, what's going on in the moment rather than in your head. Beautiful advice. And I feel like that this, yeah, but this work, yeah, thank you. No, it really is. But it's so hard to do if you've never done anything mine for tools. And we need, that's why I like this work because it really is so tangible. You can feel it immediately. It's like, and then by doing it as a ritual on a daily basis or weekly basis or whatever,

you start deepening it more and then that tactile sensation is a very practical way. You can even sit on the ball when you're driving. You can sit on it while you're driving and you can do it. Like if you don't have time to do it when you're busy in your day or whatever, even at your office desk. You can ask you how long it is. You can sit on it at your office. I mean, honestly, the more you do it, the more connected you're going to be to it, the more you just move.

You can just sit on the ball. Make sure it's not super full. It's like 60 to 70% full of air You sit on it and then you can just like do hip circles and you'll feel the sit-stones expanding over it And then the lower back releases and then you can do the kegels while it's open like that Wow, that that eccentric length I was saying and then you do the contractions around it and you can start feeling it So it's it's really turning on this brain body connection. You do go to other countries and even like when women give birth like in France, when they leave, they give them some ways to build their prevoid floor.

They give them like the apex which we talk about on the show which uses electromagnetic to help. Yeah, but we don't, but here it's like nothing, go off and have a kid and then you're fine. And we all are talking to each other. I mean, you kind of mad sometimes. I get upset with Western medicine, just that women are so flounding around.

That every time I'm out with my girlfriends and I'm sure Lauren were the same way. They're like, paramanopause or after childbirth or why? Am I sneezing and peeing or why can I have orgasms? And it's like, we all have to help each other, but there's no one in the quiet talk to my guy know and it was nothing. And I keep veering people more towards other modalities

because it's our doctors don't know. But we were raised like, they're gonna help you. But they're gonna give you a pill and some something. And tell you, yeah, but we're still connected. It's, that's exactly a lot of the women that I've worked with that have these issues. Basically, a lot of the doctors have told them, you know, you're just stuck

with this. This is your new reality. And I'm like, fuck that. I've had two babies. And I'm like, I had incontinence after my first baby, who is now six and a half. And my doctor said you just have to deal with it. And I'm like going, F that's not the way I roll, dude. I'm going to figure this out.

Like I already knew about the public floor when I had my baby. But it then put me even more on this quest. So that's bigger of this guy. So that was for me, the pelvic floor thing for me. I knew about it, I was doing sessions on it, but until you have a baby, you really don't realize what women are dealing with. It's intense.

You go through, I guess in a way, I hate to use the word trauma, but it is trauma. It is a trauma to your body. It is. And it's not fun. And it hurts. And you have to heal after and you bleed a lot. And it's, you know, I mean, it's meant to be.

And I feel like it's an amazing thing that the human body can actually do that. Like to me, it's like kind of the most like alien thing that a human body can do. It's like this miracle. But anyway, it's traumatizing. And so that's when I started using myself as a guinea pig and working with a lot of these women and developing this method. And then I also incorporate, and I do talk about it in the book, but the rebounder is.

Yeah, but I was gonna talk about the rebounder, rebounder, which is a lot of women's nightmares just to jump on a trampoline. I know. That's always like the thing. Like I jumped on a trampoline and then I peed in my pants. I haven't even seen that more in social media these days too. Like people are kind of talking about it.

Yeah, you're in here. I can't. Yeah, I can't. And it's like one way, no, it was just on a today show. There was like, not one third, maybe one third of women or more has some sort of incontinence. And it's not only from post baby, by the way. No, no. It's from gravity, from sitting too much,

from that hypertonic squeezing, cludging weakens, then the organs drop down. So the organs are not in a good position. So there's a lot of factors. So I actually basically created a program where you do the ball work, which helps activate and strengthen, and then you do a lot of inversions and inversion work, and then obviously you work

with through all the power sources, and then you bounce on the rebounder, but not like in the way that people think of it like Jane Fonda. You have to start a very light bounce. They've done a lot of research in Germany, and there's a woman that's a physical therapist that actually puts a thing up inside to test, like it's an electrode, to test the tone.

So what happens is when you stand on a rebounder, when you stand, or even gently bounce on a rebound or when you stand or even gently bounce on the rebounder, you're getting what I was saying earlier, you're getting the ecentric opening, so you're getting the resilience. So every time you lift up and then on the way down, the pelvic floor hammock opens, and then when you jump up it closes. It uses to be doing anything. No, that's the beauty of it. You don't have to do anything. All you do is you can stand and sway if you're really have like a weak pelvic floor and you have to pee all the time,

even just standing on it. You can sway, you can twist, and then little by little don't jump, but you just bounce. And then if you feel like you have to pee, you go empty, you're bladder, and you get back on again. But it will happen in like 30 days, literally.

And then by adding the ball work, the body sphere work, with the rebound, or it's like in like 30 days, literally. Like, and then by adding the ball work, the body sphere work. Cause you're opening it. With the rebounder, it's like out of this world. It is really, it is a game changer. And that's what kind of, that's where you start. So all your friends come over and start jumping in the rebounder. They're like, oh my God.

It was amazing. But if I just bounce here for a sec, I bounce on it or I was in like, I want this. I know, I wrote about this on Goop and it was like a side note of something and it blew up. Like people were like, oh my God, that's gonna help my pelvic floor

and I've had so many women right in and they're like, I was so scared about, you know, bouncing on the rebound or the trampoline and now I get it because it's sort of that same thing like in the world, like everybody like, oh, okay, I'm gonna do that and I'm gonna do it. Like, that's a thing.

Thousand percent, like, no, get on don't have to right like this is not stressful right the whole none of this is like you it's you see I'm Lord is sure like it is the opposite like every single day you must do this or do that and you do have some great right to well first of all I love that because that you're not saying every morning although it would be nice to stretch every night you get up but But it does help. Yes. I have it by my bed, the roller. I'm like, okay, I'm just gonna roll. Like it does help.

You kind of covered all the chakras and the diet and the food. And the things you should eat, like alkaline and non-aculine food, which is really having a lot of high alkaline food. But it's helpful, like just different ways, but you're not being as over the head with it. Like even if we're just doing the exercises, that would be enough.

Oh yeah, I mean, the thing is, I think, okay, so that's a big one for us now. Diet is, okay, so I think we talked about this when we chatted the first time I came over and people wanna go on these diets, they wanna, and everything is so specific right now. But then what it's doing is it's taking the power out of the person and making you do their program.

Right. And the reality is we're also different and the way that we're gonna learn But then what it's doing is it's taking the power out of the person and making you do their program. And the reality is we're also different and the way that we're going to learn about what our bodies need is by calming our nervous system down and reconnecting to ourselves and feeling again. I have seen people reduce 90% of sugar cravings by doing this work. So can you imagine? Because stress, you want to eat sugar when you're stressed. Right. So there's so many factors that are really... You go through a lot of sugar in this office, I'm just saying. Ha ha.

Well, it's, but it's really, and the other thing too, I always say to people is like, stress is a reaction. So even your language around stress, like changing your language around it, like, I have to go to work or I have to do this. Like, I get to do this. I get to pay my rent. I get to pay my mortgage. I get to go to work or I have to do this. Like, I get to do this. I get to pay my rent. I get to pay my mortgage.

I get to go pick up my girls from school, not like I have to. So I talk about that in the book too. Conscious language can shift because every thought and everything we say in a way is an intention or a prayer. So that has a lot of power behind it. And that's why I always say the power source because this to me is about empowering you, empowering ourselves to be our best selves by learning how to not just do whatever diet is out there, but like tune in, calm yourself, calm your fucking shit down. You can feel your own self again and actually make the decisions based on yourself. To me, it's, I call it intuitive eating.

Yeah, you know, no call it intuitive eating. Yeah. You don't know what's going to be. You don't know. And you're going to feel it in your belly right away. Your skin is going to, you know, your skin will tell you something if you're breaking out or, you know, like, again, hormones. Hormones are all nervous system regulated, you know,

from your glands. Right. So hormones are food. And yeah. But I really feel like, I mean mean the other thing is so important, but You're gonna want to eat healthier when you're more calm because you're gonna want to nourish yourself You're cuz you're also making yourself a priority. Yeah, and that's a big learning to like love and connect yourself We are all and when not just that we're just connected to our pelvic floor

We're disconnected to our bodies like we have an ache we're like, I don't know how I got that. We don't even know what's going on. So by being connected, I kind of like that. It's like a different way of thinking about it than just, because it isn't doing, if you buy this diet book, because this person says this or that, it's like, it might have worked for them and healed them, but we're also different. So this is so intuitive, which all of this is,

so if we all calm down and breath is a big part of it. Huge. And that's something you have some great breath exercises in here too that I was saying that I feel like a lot of us are not even taught, not only not only taught about our public floor, but we're not taught how to breathe properly. So true.

So where were we, could we do a great breath exercises that could calm us down right now? What would we do right now? I love that. I know. I thought we could do like the detoxifying one. Yeah, we can do. I bring it I thought we could do like the guitar. Sure. So, we're trying one. Yeah. We can do. I bring it down.

Let's do the lung breath because one of the things I think is really powerful too is and I've found in teaching classes and doing workshops is when people actually have the visualization of what's happening in their body and why they should do it. Okay. They're more inspired to do it and they're making the choice because they're like, oh wow. Like why don't we just do it? Let's do a little visualization of a deep breath. I love it.

You guys want to do it? Yes. Okay. So we're going to just sit up straight in our chair as much as possible. Emily's already doing it. I love it. Good student. And then stand in your feet.

So you're still sitting, but your feet are grounded about hip width apart, and then feel your big toe, pinky toe, and heel. And you can do this anywhere anytime. You could put a little towel behind your lower back if that helps, just to like get your spine really tall. So you can feel that energy going up and down your spine. And now let's just take a deep breath in, and as you breathe in through your nose, you're gonna feel naturally your diaphragm

is gonna press down into your organs, and then down into your pelvic floor. Hold the breath in, a little more in, sip a little more air in, and then slowly exhale through the mouth. And now go ahead and then vibrate it out through your throat because that actually clears those swallowed emotions too. Vibrates it out. Yeah. And then inhale through the nose, sitting up nice and tall, shoulders are relaxed, opening those lungs three-dimensionally creating that elasticity in the lungs and ribs. Hold it, feeling a little more air in the second time. Feeling a little more air in the second time. And then exhale through the mouth. That surrender exhale that really brings your body into that parasympathetic state in

the nervous system. And again, inhale through the nose. Hold it at the top. Feel like you're breathing down into your pelvic floor as well. Feel that expansion opening like a flower blooming. And then exhale. Everything just naturally contracts and all that CO2 gets rung out. All the toxic air gets out of the body. Let's do one more. Inhale through the nose. Filling up the lungs three-dimensionally, sitting up nice and tall, shoulders relaxed, breathing to the pelvic floor and to the top of the head.

And then exhale, that surrender. Good, and then slowly open your eyes, and you can feel the energy in the room changes completely, right? So you feel just that sense of calm, that sense of groundedness, that sense of presence. Yeah. You know? Oh my god, I feel so. They call it presence for groundedness, that sense of presence. Yeah. You know? Oh my god, I feel it. They call it presence for a reason, right?

I see. I see you just clear. You just learned, just got clear. And you would love about that breath as well. And this is what I've been learning that that extra sip of air on the top. Like just when you think you can't, this is how you learn to breathe properly. You can. You're clearing the co-wabs.

Yes. Yes. Most people feel that. I want to say it. I do a lot of meditation and breathing practices as well. And I have never felt so tall and lengthy in a breath practice like that before. I've already used more breaths, but I felt so tall. And when you said to the pelvic floor, all the way to your head, right?

That's it. A pillar. Yeah, when you bring in that level of awareness and you sort of realize that that's where the breath is going. Like that it's going and expanding and all the areas of the body and that when you functionally can visualize that that visualization is really powerful in the shift. Absolutely. I love that we just did that because I'm always telling people like you guys when you want to meditate or be present, briefed your pelvic floor. I love it. And I say it, but I don't know people that I'm like you're not really going

to pelvic, but if you imagine it, but the visualization is the other part of it. And I was able to be like, it's going in both places. Yeah. And I just read the audiobook too. And so I guide people through each of the power centers and the audiobook and read, you know, read through each of them.

So you say that this, and I always say this about people calling in or talk about like self-confidence and how do I get my part in being more self-confident or how do I get them to be more sexual and I'm like, it's an inside job. Like we have to all do our own work and you also say in here, you use those same words, it's inside job. So how do we explain this to our partners maybe what we're working on? And what if they aren't really along for that ride? Like, how do we, what if we feel transformation and they don't?

And also how do we explain the part about just being an inside job? Like, we, you know, okay, so that's actually a great question. I guess it depends on, I mean, I, you know, I wrote the book for women, but I also wrote my first book for women and it was the number one bestseller in men's health on Amazon. So it's a, it's really interesting. So what I really think is powerful about and practical is the science. Whenever you can, especially if let's just say it's the males that are more kind of yet

not receiving it or whatnot, bringing in the science part and then bringing in the fact that like pro athletes all over the world are using this sort of work to be at their best level. All of a sudden, the guys are like, okay, tell me more. Tell me more. Exactly. You mean I can actually have more stamina in the bedroom, I can like have more control in, you know, more. Objective control. So, yeah, that's one of the main benefits for men. Lot of my pro athletes have and they've been like, thanks, low. I love that.

They must be like, well, that makes so much sense to me. I even thought about the PE part until you said it. Oh, yeah. Big time. I mean, that's a huge part. This is literally so that to me awakens that for men big time. And if a woman is not into it, because they're like, oh, it's too woo-woo and whatever,

I mean, I would again bring the science part into it and discuss like what's happening and how it reboots your metabolism. Like, you know, I talk so much about breathing and how, well, did you know that how we actually lose fat in our body is through CO2. So the way we actually lose fat is through breath, which is people are like, oh my god. Okay, I'll breathe. Okay, please, I'll breathe.

For how long? For how many people like to conscious breath, it's like, did you have you felt that doing this through this work that you just learn now, it just said automatic, your breath are deeper, do you still find some times that you have? Oh, we all find that time where you feel like that sort of angi- Just thanks, anxious energy. But what I always say, and I say this a lot, I'm sure I said it to you in our session is, most people have, I mean, we all have the capacity

to take about two gallons worth of oxygen into our lungs. But most people are taking about 20 to 30% of that capacity on a daily basis. So you can imagine how that would affect your nervous system, your hormones, your metabolism, your ability to deal with stress, you know, being in that's basically that, that sympathetic state of the nervous system about, you know, fight or flight. So if we're not taking those deep volume as breaths, then we're missing

out on, I always like to say the way we breathe is the way we live. So we're missing out on a lot of depth in life. You know? So true. Yeah. I'm gonna let that sink in for a minute. So why not? Why not? You're shallow life.

We want to do everything else deep. We want to have deep sex. So we want to have, you know what I mean? We want to have deep connections. We want to have deep pockets. We want to have deep everything. Like why wouldn't we want to breathe deep too? Because that's the beginning of it all. We don't even know that we're not and then we don't really know how and Breath during sex what I love was all the connective areas in here is that like is that breathing during sex helps

Facilitate orgasm because we're holding our breath But then to add in this like practicing it when you're not just having sex but in day-to-day life Like even when I'm stressed when I'm driving or you know I I feel like I, from going somewhere and I'm like, I'm stressed out or thinking about what's happening, I really do, I be present, put my hands on the steering wheel, what am I listening to, engage my senses? And then I, I just do 10 deep breaths sometimes,

even just deeper than normal. And it really does work, you guys. Right now, you're listening, and I'm stressed out, it's just, just breath. And then I'm gonna send your ball now when I'm driving. I don't have that anymore. Or the dome behind your back.

It's phenomenal. Or behind the shoulder blades where you're driving or on an airplane. It's like I used to when I was in bed because after I got sick, I would just lie there with the half dome on my align dome. I want to say it right, the half dome.

The align dome. The align dome. Half domes that you're somebody, right? Yeah. The align dome, under my leg and just realizing like my thigh is like opening up, like you just move it at the point. It's just not. It's not.

Not to mention, flushing the lymphatic system and getting rid of toxins and reducing cellulite and I mean, it's, yeah. It's like this. That's what rolling is. That's why fascia is so fascinating. It is fascinating, and no one really understands this stuff. But you do Lauren. But it is definitely having a moment right now and it's not going anywhere because it's

I think it's the beginning too. Thank you for bringing the moment to the world. Yeah. You're doing such amazing work Lauren. I can't wait for everybody to read the power source. It's coming out just in a few days. So okay, let's brainstorm here. What could people we want to do some giveaways?

Love it. Of the whole, so people can get the book, they can get your kit. Yes. How do you all three? Well, basically, I have two rollers. I have the big 36 inch one and then the small travel one, which is 12 inches. And then I have the three new products, the body sphere, the align domes, which come in two packs, because you can use them for your hands and feet. Phenomenal. And then I have the little mini infinity roll. So we can do, we'd love to do a giveaway with a few of those kids along with the book, which would be like, and then even a rebounder too, a Balcon Low Rocks rebounder.

Oh my God. Okay. So what in your life, like how you felt more open sexually, like did it have packed your sex life, I'm sure it has, but. Absolutely. Like, you, like your sex life, I'm sure it has, but. Absolutely. Like, orgasmic more. Oh my gosh, yes.

I mean, I think, okay, so because of just that idea of expansion and letting go a little more and just surrendering and allowing, like that's that flow that we always talk about. And also, like what happens is those inhibitions lie away. So you become, it's almost like you get to be transformed into this moment of pleasure where you're, because you're not even in your head, you're just feeling. It's not even like, you're battling it.

It's not even like, you're battling it anymore. Yeah, you're feeling the energy connect, you're feeling like inhibitions, and then also like making noises, like, you know, being sensual, like making sounds. Like, that's actually, it's good for you. and then also making noises, like being sensual, making sounds, like that's actually really you. And that's by the way, that's ancient stuff, like from like Omin, they do that, like Omin and yoga.

Well, in my research studying, researching for this book too, is like I found that that idea of Omin or even, I mean, what do you call it when you moaning? Moaning, it's God. Oh my God. I always say that. It's like the same. It helps facilitate more pleasure.

It really does. It's a vibration. It is. We talk about this a lot. I'm like, people need to make more noise during sex. I think we are used to maybe being silent because we were masturbating and our parents are going to walk in. Oh really?

Or we're feeling like we're being judged at the right noise. But once you are more relaxed, you realize that you just let go, like make some noise. You go, you allow, you feel the energy, like I know it sounds cheesy, I always say when I met Gus, like we had these, my hubs, we had this connection of like the five power centers all connected. It was like they all aligned.

And there was like this fire that lit up, we could feel it on every level. And so, but that feeling of centrality and connection is, connection is, you know, it's not just about sex. It's about these layers of connection and support and feeling like, and more sensual than even the sexual. Yes. Yeah. The sensuality when you have those other layers, like I was saying, like living deeper,

breathing deeper, like sensuality, sexuality, it's not about like a quick fix. I mean, maybe it is sometimes, but like most of the time it's about like feeling again and like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's sexuality, it's not about like a quick fix. I mean, maybe it is sometimes, but like most of the time it's about like feeling again and like it's like an escape from reality where you're just so present with this other person's energy and you just feel so connected and whole. Yeah, yeah, I love it. Thank you.

And I was actually just having a vision now if couples did this together. Oh, that it's like. Miracle. I just thought about, I mean maybe I don't know if you've had couples who've done it together but I feel like, what if they're like 10 minutes? I mean, I love that a lot of your videos are in your courses, they're like 10, 15 minutes. It's like, I can do this. It's not too much of a commitment but then I felt good, I kept going and doing them.

So I was like, oh, I don't know, that's something about me with my ADD. I'm like, my producer, it's only five minutes' time when you can watch it, you know? But then if I'm in, I'm in, like, yeah. So I think that's great too. Couple of us could do this. Yeah, the top both. Well, because then if both of the people are becoming more present and more sensual

and feeling more and less stressed and less of that armor being held around their bodies and their energy, then all of a sudden, the ability to connect is so much better. And then you're able to not be in a blaming mode of, do this, do that. You're like, like I always say, like be the partner you want to be with, you know? I mean, that's not my quote, but I love that. Yeah, be the person you want to find.

Yes. I read that. Who wrote that book? There was a book. I think it was Sherry Huber. I don't know if she's the one who said it, but yes, it's so true. Be the person you want to find. So true.

You're not a half person looking for your other half. Like if you want to find like a person that's sensual and feeling and connected and listening and present with you, then be that person and you will nice. It's literally quantum physics. It will happen. It will happen. Yeah.

I talked about that in the book too about writing the list of the person that you want to manifest. Let's could we talk about that for a minute because I haven't really about that this year. And let's talk about writing the list. Okay, I'm trying to remember. Okay. Yeah, I think it's important People don't believe me and I'm like many people have done this and it works. They read it You they do it. They sage it whatever and bring it down to being intentional

Okay, so the key to that is again not Think not doing what you think the world wants you to do But actually going within, the only way to go within is to go into that parasympathetic state of the nervous system to connect, to listen, to your inner being essentially, and then you write it down. And so when you write it down, that's just the mind part, okay? So the key is that you have to feel it. So your mind, your mind and thoughts have to match your emotions and your feelings.

And so otherwise you're doing this like an X. You're basically like, you're thinking one thing, but your body and your emotions are not matching that. So nothing manifests, right? So they have to be in coherence essentially in order for that to become reality. So the best way to do that is write it down from the mind because you have to use your thoughts to write it down

and conceptualize it. But then you have to also decide, do you feel what you wrote down? Like does it actually resonate in your system in your cellular vibration? Then you have to put that list away and basically let it go. And you have to surrender.

To like, that's what I want. You have to let it go and you have to surrender. That's what I want. You have to let it go, and you have to allow the universe to bring that energy into your life, and that is trusting the magic of the unknown. That's one of my affirmations every morning. I trust the magic of the unknown, because there are so many gifts in the magic of the unknown, and I know it sounds woo-woo, but it is science.

Yes. Quantum physics, it sounds woo-woo, but it is science. Yes. Quantum physics. It is like literally like energy. It's sacred energy. It's true. It's true. I don't think it's woo, but I know that people do. And it's just so important to remember that it's true.

What you manifest, what you believe, what you put out there. Yeah. But it's a life practice. It's hard to remember sometimes, but you're right. So you wake up. And then, so have you had, is this how you found us? Yes. Oh, so that's the story I talk about in the to remember sometimes, but you're right. You wake up and then so have you had this is how you found us? Yes, oh, so that's the story I talk about in the book. I don't know how I'm okay. No, no, it's fine And I'm sure I mean it's something I talk a lot about we both wrote these lists like a year before meeting each other

We both wrote it to yeah, so then we got set up on this blind date Which is like a miracle neither of us were looking for it. We were both kind of over it. Like, no, you know, we were kind of like, ah, I don't think I ever want to get married. I don't think I want to have kids. Like, and he was kind of like, had been there, done that, dated all these women. So we met on that blind date. And I just saw him like, at the bar,

I saw his back and he was turning to the side. And I was like, please let that be him. Please let that be him. Oh my gosh. Big, strong back. And I was just like, he just like melted me. And then we met and it was like, I mean, no looking back. Oh my God.

And how long have you written that list? We both. And we were on a hike, like maybe three months into dating. And I'm like, yeah, I wrote this list. He's like, I wrote a list too. His friend, his girlfriend, friend, that was a girl, was like, you have to write this list. He was kind of like, oh no, that's cheesy or whatever.

And she made him do it and he did it. And see, this is what I've been saying. We all in here, we're gonna do this, we still can do this list. We're gonna follow Lauren's list. You guys, it's so powerful too. But I think the most important thing is it has to really be you, like your authentic.

Yeah. Not what you think the world is. No, your parents think you want. Yeah, exactly. I did a list, I don't parents think you want. Yeah, I've done a list. I don't know why I'll go, but I was saying that I never really want, was as interested in finding someone until recently. And away.

There you go. I guess that was also interesting. Now I'm going to be a day people, but yeah, I'm like, you guys, everyone does these lists and they work. So I love these stories. They really do. I hear them a lot.

OK, save, thank you. Lauren Rocks for being here. The Power Sources are a book. Enter the contest, we explained to you earlier. Also, I've got five questions that I ask. I guess I'm gonna ask. Okay, ready? Okay, quick questions.

What's one thing you would tell your younger self about sex and relationships? There's one thing. I would say, oh my gosh, man, I struggled back in the day. Like, I would say, you my gosh, man, I struggled back in the day. Like, I would say you're like just believe in yourself. It's all gonna happen for you. It's all gonna fall in place and you will find the love of your life.

What's your favorite personality trait in another person? Oh gosh, kindness. Yeah. How would you describe your relationship in three words or sex life or relationship? I don't know if you want to pick. Three words. I mean, love of my life, really. Something random that turns you on. Something random that turns you on. Mm.

Oh my god, I mean, is it a mental thing? Or is it like anything? Just like when my husband grabs my waist, you know, like that hourglass area, like that just so sexy to me, you know, around the hip. Yes, it's a turn on. Totally, get that. Okay, It's a turn on. Totally. Get that. OK.

Number one, a number one relationship tip. Oh, relationship tip, I think it would be the partner you want to be with. That's good. OK. Thank you so much, Laura, for being here. Thank you. Thank you.

This is so exciting. This is so exciting. I love it when I check out the power source. Thanks, you guys. I hope you enjoyed the show with Lauren. I know I enjoyed talking to her. And thank you everyone for listening. Thanks, you guys. I hope you enjoyed the show with Lauren. I know I enjoyed talking to her. And thank you everyone for listening. Thanks to my amazing team, Ken, Kristen, Michelle, producer, Jamie, and Michael.

Was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithamlake.com. you