Sex With Emily - Sex in Retrograde

Episode Date: December 29, 2018

On today’s show, Emily is joined by Elizabeth Kott & Stephanie Simbari from the That’s So Retrograde podcast to talk about mindfulness, wellness & how it relates to your relationships – with yourself and a partner. The three discuss what all this “retrograde” talk really means and what it can mean for your life, some alternative ways to work on yourselves – because we’re never done improving, and how your gut is like your second brain – and how it relates to your sexual health. Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep the show FREE: Plus One, Womanizer, Uberlube, SiriusXM, We-Vibe Follow Emily on all social: @sexwithemily Follow Elizabeth on Instagram: @elizabethkott Follow Stephanie on Instagram: @ssimbari Listen to That's So Retrograde: @soretrograde For even more sex advice, tips & tricks, visit: sexwithemily.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. On today's show, I'm joined by Elizabeth Cot and Stephanie Symbari from the That's So Retrograde podcast to talk about mindfulness, wellness, and how it relates to your relationships with yourself and a partner. Topics include, what does all these retrograde talk really mean and what does it mean for your life? Some alternative ways to work on yourself because we're never done improving and you know I'm all about self-work. Why astrology can actually tell us a lot more than we think it does, and how your gut is like your second brain, and how it relates to your sexual health.

All this and more, thanks for listening. Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mark our sacred institutions Betrubized they call them in a bygone way. Hey, Emily. You got a boyfriend because my man E here You just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute The girls got every stand. Oh my the women know about shrinkage isn't it common? What do you mean like laundry? It's shrink. Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh?

I'm so proud being, so, so. Being bad feels pretty good. But you know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between for more information. Go to sexwithelmy.com.

If you not, check it out, Lely, because it's a good, friggin' time. We've got a lot of things there to help you have the sex and relationships that you've dreamed of. And also, if you haven't yet, find me on serious XM Monday through Friday, five to seven PM Pacific, eight to 10 East. It repeats, which is so awesome from nine to 11 Pacific on stars, one of nine. We take your calls. We take sex so check that out that's been exciting but not to worry we're still doing now three podcasts a week used to be two so

now you're getting a bonus podcast because we love you and as always you can find me at sex family cross the board on all social media I am so excited to welcome my guest to the show I'm jumping right into that I have here's here's who they are. They are the host creators, founders, lovers. They're not actually lovers, but I love them. That's so retrograde podcast, coined the ad tab of the new age. They are quite fabulous. You know what you've guessed coming in?

Well, you don't know this because you didn't show, but if you do, and you're like psyched, you're like, don't need to prep, don't need to think about it. I know it's gonna be awesome because everything they have to say is super inspiring and their cool chicks. Elizabeth Cot, Stephanie Symbari.

Hi. Hi. Welcome to the show. Thank you. Let's give out the social first at Elizabeth Cot. Mm-hmm. K. K.

T.T. Thanks. At S. Symbari. That's S-I-M-B-A-R-I. Right, and on Twitter, you're Steph Simbari. Yeah, but I like, I have a, you know, I hate ones a month, slash ones every six months. Do the Instagram, and then you guys also have a that-

It's so retrograde. At so retrograde. At so retrograde. At that so retrograde. No, that's. Take out the that. Take out the that. Just so retrograde.

So retrograde. Yeah. You so can't miss it. Yeah, that's so awesome. So. You're so awesome. Oh, you guys, so tell me what So retrograde. You so can't miss it. Yeah, that is so awesome. So you're so awesome. Oh, you guys, so tell me what's going on. That you guys started the podcast. How long ago now?

It'll, we were working on it around four years ago. This time we launched in February. It will be like four years on air. Okay. What was the concept? Tell me about how it all came together. Well, we kind of were really just obsessed with astrology and into making our lives better and smoking weed. And we set out to make this podcast that sort of positioned us as experts

on astrology. And quickly we realized that we knew nothing about astrology. And so we decided that we would just be explorers in the space. And that's really taken us very far. Yeah. So really, it's just explorers in these different and that's really taking us very far. Yeah, so really it's just Explorers in these different modalities that like as as one of our astrologers said help people find their soul. Yeah Okay, so it was really let's talk about astrology though for a minute because I feel like I always read my horoscope What are you? I'm a Gemini guest. You don't know astrology What are you? I'm a Gemini. Oh, guest. See, you don't know astrology, do you?

We don't claim to know. I mean, Gemini, I love reading, when I dating someone, my boyfriend was a Gemini, so then we had the same birthday. I thought that meant something. So anyway, and I think we all read our horoscopes, but I don't really, is there a lot of value to it, truly, what you've learned? We all learned from it. Well, tell me.

I'll start. to it truly what you've learned. We all learned from it. Well, tell me. I'll start. So I think that it's interesting because we've all come to know Astrology just as like, I'm a Gemini. I'm a Scorpio. She's a Taurus. You're a... Aries.

OK. You're a... Oh, yeah. What's your birthday? No, Vendor Feth. Oh, I am the third. I'm the third. Thank you.

Brother. So, but that's just one aspect. Like if you actually get your chart red, it's a gigantic circle and there's like lines and dashes and symbols and aspects and all these different energies that are at play. So basically it's like to know your whole chart is really the most empowered thing you can do because it's described as a snapshot of the moment that you were born. It's basically like the blueprint of your soul and you can learn so much about yourself through knowing all these different ways

that you're gonna play with yourself in the world, with your emotions, with relationships, with work, like there's, it can describe and give you the archetype of how you will be in all aspects of your life. And you found it to be very accurate. It's incredible. And then Stephanie, as business partners,

we did work that traditionally, one of the astrologists we work with will do for couples in a romantic relationship, which is a composite chart. Yeah. And so to work through some hurdles in our business partnership, we did like astrology couples counseling. I love it. And it's been because we, when you learn how people intrinsically think and how they see the world

and how they approach conflict based on their astrological blueprint, you're then able to understand and kind of predict how that person is going to be able to like work through a problem. So you can, in tone, like work through it easier. It definitely like helps with the communication because so say she knows that I'm the kind of person that's not gonna respond to a certain type of confrontation. She can then approach me in a different way or yeah,

it's a really interesting way to kind of have compassion towards someone else's way of being and not put your own agenda on them and then get angry at them for not being like you. I think that's like a lot of what happens in relationships and you're just like that's just not gonna work for them Right, so I'm just not gonna do that. Okay. It's really cool That is cool. I got my chart done like 20 years ago. What do you still do? I need to do it again They say you should get your chart read once a year. Oh, oh, I have so on actually my acupuncturist

Yeah wants to do my chart because actually my acupuncturist wants to do my chart because it also smells like a great Emily. Is it it? So he's like, and literally I've had a reminder on my phone for two months, it says find your, I can't find my birth time. I think in the beginning of every year,

it's a cool thing for you to do because it kind of will map and track like what unique challenges you have that year or what we'll be working for you that year and what sort of like things to look for and things to look out for, it's really like why wouldn't you want a roadmap? Okay, good.

What's that word that's meant? So then more than, so what about all the people who are like, what I read it mine, and like I get these emails everyday, like oh, more scope, I read it sometimes. That's fine, that's basically like one hundredth of the story. And I think that those are just a really beautiful modality

in weaving consciousness into your day. Yeah, just to have somebody say like, here's something to look up for. Like those just kind of like generic readings. Like there's nothing wrong with that. That really, it adds perspective and you're able to look at situations in a much deeper level. It's all good. It's just like an added layer of consciousness. Got it. Okay, so different modalities. So what are the other modalities that you guys have found now after a few years doing the show that have been, that could be helpful and relatable? Yeah. I think the biggest thing for me this year was Feng Shui,

which was something that I so badly wanted to learn about and I talked about it on the show and I was like, this is something I'm so into and I couldn't really find like the right person to learn from. And then this woman Like kind of like popped out of the sky for both of us this year and we just like totally dug her approach and A lot of stuff to do with relationships and you'll find this really interesting like the right side of Size of bed you should have in your room for relationships

So like are having mirrors in your room if you're having a problem with trust or infidelity like having a mirror in your bedroom It's like magnifying the issues and I'll feel like imagery of twos is better than threes having things on both sides You're bad. I was like so many symbolic things that sort of subconsciously Infantry your life and think I mean bed is best because you're like not too far apart. You're not too close There's enough room. It's just really interesting. Thank God you didn't take King. I really fit my room. And she frames.

And God damn it. She frames it. And what we really responded to is the fact that it can really, your fungshway, your space could act as a living vision board. So it's broken up into these nine different categories, the Bhagwat chart. And you can see what part is relationship, what part is success, the Bhagwat chart, and you can see what part is relationship, what part is success, what part is family, what part is health,

and kind of work through that in the space that you're in to really call and think. So she came into your home and walked around, and I get her name because I've been in my business. I've moved in two years ago, I have no furniture. Yeah, absolutely. Oh my gosh, you're working on being obsessed with that. But I'm not ready in the new year of doing it, so I've been thinking I need fungshway. Megan Wallace, James, Oh my gosh, you're working to be obsessed with that. But I'm not ready in the new year of like doing it. So I've been thinking I need Feng Shui.

Yeah, Megan Wallace James is her name. She was probably one of my most favorite discoveries we've had this year. And then it's like the shui of your life, like computer shui. Like I'm holding on to like all these old files I don't need are like shower shui. Like how many shampoos do we need? And it's just all about just like cleaning this late, relationship shui. like get the people who are dragging you down out of there. Let's talk, yeah, I think this makes so much sense,

because I often think about that. Like when you walk in your room, you can feel when something's not right. And we do often talk on the show about like, if you are single, for example, making your room welcoming to welcome someone else. So if they come in and you've got your bed against the wall, one night stand, like not enough room,

you just have two night stands either side and just set it up in that way, but God I'd love to have the bedroom She says my favorite thing bedroom needs to be for two things sleeping in sex Yeah, and nothing else like no tech no and once you clear everything out like what really holds space for sleeping in sex Yeah exactly like what else is there's just to be to do in the bedroom? Okay, I find that fascinating Yeah, and it's also just like energetically I know like when my house wasn't in order and I knew things and exactly what else is there to do in the bedroom? Okay, find that fascinating. And it's also just energetically, I know when my house wasn't in order and I knew things, I knew if I, even if I'd put them in a closet,

I knew they were there, I'd go into my house, I'd bring someone in and I'd be in that state of weird shame, even though I wasn't saying it, it was definitely an energy that I was carrying. And now I'm like, come into my room, look at how there's nothing here, there's eucalyptus in the corner and it's all pink, and it's like, let's get to it.

You wanna sleep over and have sex? Yeah, I don't know if you should come over. Like it's okay, like I have to wear a star. I have a lot of energy blocks around my house, yeah, and I would be thinking, I need someone who knows space, because to me I know what's wrong. I even just turn my couch other day,

because I do have a couch, but I'm getting rid of it, that's all I have. But I thought this opened up the whole room. I feel better, like energy was flowing and I think it felt tight and constricted. So that is really cool. I love that. What was the one for you too? Was it the fungshway? Oh, I mean, I'm such a big fan.

I love fungshway for sure. That's been really helpful. It's hard for me to pick because there's so many. Because there's so many. QRP facials. I love the key. I love the key. That's really cool. Yeah. I mean, wow.

Cause I'm, I like, I don't wanna look old, obviously. But I also like have a thing against, I'm scared to get Botox again. I got it when I turned 30, cause I was in a panic. I'm ready to. And then I got it once more, cause I was in another panic.

And now I'm just kind of like, not trying to do that. So I'm trying to find other ways to keep up with the young looking jones of Los Angeles. Both look fabulous. Thank you. I have said yes to both. So, yes. I'm also because I have like an eye issue and I'm afraid that if I put poison on my face, I'm just like I'm trying to not irritate anything in my system. So PRP is amazing. Yeah, it's true. I think numerology is very fascinating. Yeah, I love that too. Sister friends with astrology. We've had that done together too.

Yeah, that's really interesting. Our first episode at the top of the year, it runs through all the numerology. Of 2019. So we can all, you can check that out for curious because what I'm curious at people listening, like, oh yeah, I don't really get all this stuff, but it sounds interesting.

What you guys do in your podcast is like, you're learning along with everyone else. And you're actually on the journey, and you break it down, and you guys are real, and you're funny, and you're cool chicks. And you're like, this is what we got, what we didn't see you're honest about. So it's not like someone's got to be like,

oh, it's all woo-woo, like, we really try to ground it in conversational banter, so that, and people can just take the information that works for them and try something and put it down and we say we like to provide the information so everyone can build their own tool kit So there's absolutely no one size fits all We don't preach like you must meditate But we will talk about the scientific benefits of meditation and have the leaders in the space on to communicate all of that And like if that inspires someone to try it, that's really all we really aim for.

Right, you're not like pushing down their throat, but hopefully they'll pick up like just a gun and this podcast we cover so many things about sex. Exactly. One day they're gonna wanna be ball gagged and change. Like I know about anal sex from your show, but like I haven't needed to throw that in my toolkit

just yet. But if it does, it'll longer, but like Emily says, go slow, breathe slow and use lots of loops. I know exactly the type of loop to use. Exactly. So it does come along, you're going to be like, Emily says, go slow, breathe slow, and use lots of loops. I know exactly the type of loop to use. Exactly. So it's like all in the toolkit. You will be leaving the loop. Basically, today, FYI.

Yeah. We're basically the same show. Yeah. I think we are the only way. You don't want to fuck you too hard in the ass. Wow. We said, is that your sign off? Yeah.

I love it. But no, I love that. It is kind of true because you're breaking down this hole because everyone knows, everybody knows now if you've been living on planet Earth for at least the last 10 some odd years, you should probably meditate. They saw yoga mats at Walgreens.

Like the whole wellness health spirituality space is there. And I think there's a gateway that they can't quite, or there's a hurdle. They're like, well, I don't really know. And I don't really, so the way you guys kind of feed it, they can kind of, they choose. But what do you think, do you hear from. They're like, well, I don't really know. And I don't really, so the way you guys kind of feed it, they can kind of, they choose. But what do you think, do you hear from people who are like, I, I want us get into the space and I'm not sure what it means for me, where do I start with being more enlightened, if

you will? What does that even mean? What I always say to people is just follow your curiosity. Whatever is the most interesting to you, go towards that, because it doesn't really matter what your entry point is. It matters your connection to the thing that you're looking towards. And there's no shortage of people at this point like touting this information. At this point, it's really like mainstreaming in a very real and amazing way.

So we're just here being like, do whatever you want to do it. What feels good to you, what sounds good to you. Just try something and then that will lead to something else. The biggest thing, the biggest like disservice I think that you can do to yourself is to think that there's a disconnect between you and the thing. Because your wellness and your health and your well-being isn't something that is outside of you. You have everything that you need.

You just might need like an assistive of some kind or like guidance, but really internally at the end of the day, what we've learned is like really, truly, all you really need is like water and meditating and you'll be fine. And breathing is true, like the more we learn, the more we're like, what's our secret? Hydrating and breathing.

It's so true. You don't need a whole bunch of shit. You really don't really sleep to take a sip of water at the moment. Yeah, listen, everyone, yeah. Have you had your 50 ounces of ounces? It's come about in an interesting time where our health and like a macro scale were not supported by our government. No, it is completely turned our back on supporting our health. So it is imperative that we all take

it into our own hands. And so if we can be the tiniest part of introducing people to information. The tiniest part? The tiniest part. The tiniest part. You're a little tiniest people. Can you talk about that more about our government and what you mean by that? I'm assuming a healthcare system. Healthcare system is impossible.

And if you are even trying to look out for yourself, there's the languaging in the hurdles of just even signing up for covered California. It just is not clear. And I will say that the way that medicine is structured now in that system is that they're treating the symptoms and not the cause. So say you're depressed, which I'm sure a lot of people

are depressed. They're going to say at this moment, but I think that's it. But we are living in a time when a lot of people are, yeah, it's a depressing time. But depression stems from other things besides Donald Trump, besides the economy, it's not just about the external thing. That's a side thing. But you're depressed.

They're like, oh, we're depressed. Hold on, we have this fucking booklet of all these pills you can take to treat your depression. But what they're not looking at is what's going on inside of your body that might be like adding to your depression. Your gut health, for example, is like the first thing that you should look at if you're depressed. Your second brain is in your gut. It's like well-documented.

All the research is calling your gut your second brain. Like 90% of your testosterone lives in your digestive tract. Your immune system lives in your digestive tract. It's like so much is going on there that's a give your brain a pill which we don't even know that much about as the first line of defense is a mistake. That's treating the symptom and not the cause. And that's how so much of medicine functions right now. Yeah, I think you're so right. And I'm just hearing more about this because I always feel like I've been healthy, but I've been hurt and the more road I've been going down with like acupuncture and massage. I hurt my backs. I've had to like slow down this year and be,

which I think has been a good thing, thing ultimately when you get sick or something happens. But I've heard more about this, that your gut is your second, what did you say your second brain? Your second brain. And so talk more about that because I was shocked, like I actually kind of heard it, but now I keep hearing it. So let's talk about how can people know if they're gut's healthy? Well, most people's guts are not healthy.

Exactly. Because we're living in a very over processed chemical world. So how do you know if your guts unhealthy? Let's see. I mean, going to the bathroom regularly is a number one indicator. But what is your poop? What does it look like? How does it feel when you do it? Is it solid? Is it what's the call? Like it's gross to talk about. It's like probably not what people want to hear, but like, your poop is like a weird tell of, obviously, the inside of your body. There's that. Then, like, what's happening with your skin, what's happening with your energy levels? Do you have brain fog? I mean, these are all symptoms of an imbalanced gut. Is, are you really gassy? Are you cramping? Does it hurt? When you

eat certain things, is it burning? Like, it's not hard to tell that some things in balance, but I know so many people that will eat something. It'll hurt. They do it every day and they take a thumbs. Right. Every day. And it's like you're fucking your soul. Exactly.

Warren, California. We are so lucky. Like I literally dry past 16 Pilates studios, eight acupunctureists, wellness, there's five whole foods. Like we are lucky we live here in the space where it's everywhere. But if I'm in Michigan, Elizabeth and I both grow up in Michigan, Michigan, are you in Arkansas, are you in Florida?

And it's not. What kind of work, where would you start? If your doctor's saying take a pill, is this accessible? Can you find this kind of help if you're not in California? Or, you know, are you kidding me? Or yourself? Yeah, I think there's more and more resources available

to us that it was interesting. It's South by Southwest two or three years ago, went during tech. You can kind of always see like what trend is happening. And the biggest thing was health and health apps and all of these different things, as a direct response to the fact that everyone was feeling so failed by the way our health systems were set up.

And so this now, you know, that being a few years ago is now trickling down. So there's a lot of different apps. I think a lot of the insurance companies are getting hip to the more natural offering. A lot of insurance companies in. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit.

A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit.

A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. A little bit. It is turning around in its favor and the fact that we're just the access to information is there.

To somebody who maybe didn't feel like a family medicine doctor is really giving them the full diagnosis or help they need. A natural path is always a sound investment. Get your poop tested, get a blood plant panel. So that's what I was gonna say is you have to ask for those things though is the thing like a lot of times a doctor Won't say oh let's test your poop. Let's test your blood They'll just give you like the basic rundown. It's interesting. Your Western doctor will do that Yeah, and the American just the basics the basics and the American system of reading your blood It's also like they won't tell you something's wrong until you're like really sick So there's like this whole level in between like what's thriving and what's like your very ill.

And there's a middle ground where in America, they'll say like you're fine. But you're not. So you have to ask for these tests. You have to have them read by someone who is a naturopathic doctor, but literally like a poop test any doctor can run it. And they can tell you, oh, you've been eating eggs and

you're allergic to eggs. You have a dairy sensitivity. Wherever you live, you could do that. That is a terrible. And that's the thing you need to take. Take initiative with your doctor. That's the answer. Yeah, no, that is such good advice.

And also, I don't think, I mean, this might be making an assumption, but I'm pretty sure no matter where you live, there's some kind of natural clinic acupuncturist within a hundred miles of where you live in America. Like I probably could say that with like 90% certainty that they're around. Yeah, they are around. You just have to look for it. Yeah. So it's because you're right. South by Southwest is a great indicator, but that is where a lot of tech and trends are. That's where it kind of gets set every year of the conference in Austin.

If you haven't been, we were there, we missed each other. We did. And can I plug one thing to like if you're someone who's like were there, we missed each other. We did. And can I plug one thing too? Like if you're someone who's like, oh, I don't know where to start. I there's no Whole Foods or Natural Grocery near me. And I don't know what to do or where to buy. Like I would say two things.

Like try an elimination diet. If you're eating something regularly that's hurting your body, try to eliminate each food group. Over the court, like say, like, okay, I'm not going to do dairy for the next three weeks. So I feel if that doesn't do anything, okay, I can have, okay, I'm not gonna do dairy for the next three weeks, so I feel, if that doesn't do anything, okay, I can have dairy, I'm not gonna do grains for the next three weeks, so I feel,

maybe, okay, that's fine, I'm not gonna do nuts. Like, your body, you need to treat your body like it's your own science experiment. And then you can order good food on thrivemarket.com. That's true. Yeah, where he stands. Which is an incredible resource. What's your code?

Retrograde. I love I love I'm not that you see my sponsor, but not anymore so no, it's cool right so they're amazing No, it's thrive market use code retrograde. Yeah, I mean, I wasn't even saying that's a plug our thing But I don't mind if you do But I just think that people should know that there's that because you're not around Whole foods or something doesn't mean that you're outside of what's possible for you in terms of healthy options. We're going to take a quick break and we'll come back with more Elizabeth and Stephanie.

When I went to see my Western doctor about my back, for example, and I told her that I was going to see, I said, well, I think I'm gonna do acupuncture and I'm singing that. She's like, well, supplements don't work and that's not proven. And it's like, cedars. See, but then that's the thing. It's like, so who are you looking to, not to get like political,

but like then you're looking to the FDA. And the FDA is clearly not steering us on the right track 100% of the time. So if something isn't FDA, quote unquote, FDA approved like that to me personally is like, so. Yeah, exactly. And that's the FDA's doing. What is FDA approving that are,

and literally curling our society. And like, I guess I would ask you, like when your doctor said that, how did you feel when she said supplements don't work? What was your like internal read? My internal read was like, I've been seeing this natural path, imbar, bank, schlepping there,

and he's, I know that it's helping me. He read my blood work so differently than you did, but I had to go in because I slipped the disc and I just had to go through the motions so she could recommend that I go see a physical therapy. I just listened to her going, I knew you'd say that and I'm sad for you. So that's the thing,

and I think something that's really challenging. I didn't even try to change her mind, she knows. And you shouldn't, but what I'm saying is to be in your own personal power of saying, I'm trusting my internal read versus you as this so-called authority figure, I think is very difficult. I've been in a position where I've had to stand up to doctors before, and it's so challenging because we give them this power.

And I guess on some level we should, but because the paradigm is shifting of these kinds of things, it really does come down to your intuition and you being like, I don't think what you're saying is correct. In fact, I know what you're saying is incorrect, and I need to trust myself more than I trust you right now. Right, and trust by God.

And that's why if you have healthier guns, that's a real thing. You can say, trust your God, there's a reason. We have our intuition and our lives there. Like it's a real thing. Yeah. Because I trust your gut. There's a reason we have our intuition and center of lives. They're like, we know most the answers. Yeah. We truly do. And most of what we know, all that we need is inside of us already. Yeah. In many ways. Namaste. Namaste. Okay, so we're not retrograde. I need to ask you guys because I know that you're thing. But like, is that real too? Mercury and retrograde? Is that really going

to, because we always joke, everyone does. Oh God, my cell phone. I lost it. It cracked. What does it really mean? Mercury and retrograde, is that really gonna, because we always joke, everyone does. Oh God, by cell phone, I lost it, it cracked. What does it really mean? Mercury, my brain. Talk the astrological and I'll talk the avoid, things you should avoid. Okay, because I did just find this article, I was gonna talk about all the things for the new year. I'm like, I don't understand the retro,

I should care about that too. What article? Something how each planet's retrograde will affect you in 2019. Okay, well here's the thing about that. Where's that article from? you in 2019. Well, here's the thing about that. Where's that article from? Jortego.

OK. I don't know what that is, but I'm sure they're great people. So actually, in 2019, we have a pretty chill year as far as retrogrades or concern 2018 was a very intense year of retrogrades. We had gigantic planetary retrogrades, Mars and Venus, which, okay, so, okay. So, here we go. Retrograde happens is a phenomenon

that happens to every planet in that. Basically, the energy of the planet slows, so it's not creating the same energetic field around it. So the way that it relates to us on Earth and our bodies that are made of water and all that shit, changes. It looks like it's moving backwards. It looks like it's moving backwards,

but it's actually not moving backwards. It's just changing speed. Okay, yes, yeah, I get it, I get it. Yeah. So kind of like when you're going by a car and it like, you know how that happens when you, it looks like the car is standing still, but it's, yeah, you're just passing it. It's like that. So Mercury, the planet itself, is the ruler, all the planets, rule different archetypes and energy forces. So Mercury, and Euro-Geminine,

which is ruled by Mercury, which is the planet of communication. Yeah, here we are. Hey, I'm in the right place. Thank God. I'm in the right job. So yeah, exactly. Gemini's love to speak, not to throw this into the mix, but Donald Trump is a Gemini, and that's why he can't stop tweeting, because he's, he's out of fucking control. Yes.

Oh, God. Kanye West is a Gemini. Can't shut the fuck up. Doesn't know how to stop talking. Like, those are shadow, dark aspects of being a Gemini. You're in a good positive light Gemini. But these are things that we see with signs where it's like if there's some sort of imbalance, it will go off the rails.

So Mercury's ruling communication and such technology and transportation. So that's why it's like my phone, my car. So that's really true. We should pay attention to that. But they got in 2019. But Mercury will go retrograde every year. So that's the one planet We should pay attention to that. But they got in 2019, but mercury will go retrograde every year So that's the one planet that every year goes retrograde and I will say for all those four times a year wheeling and dealing out there Try to avoid signing contracts during a retrograde

Unless some if the if the deal has been like a long time in the works. It's okay But recommend it not and we've at times we've been like we need to wait til it's okay, but recommend it not, and we've, at times, we've been like, we need to wait tilts out of the retrograde and they say okay. Yeah. I'm curious, because we're in LA, but we're in LA, they're like, of course. See, I really so obsessed with the retrogrades too,

because what, think of the word retrograde, it's like a reword. So all of the words that start with re, like revisit, review, revise, like all of these resolutions, all these things that have to do with re come up during the retrograde depending on which planet is in retrograde. So like this last year, we had Venus retrograde for many months, which is like the planet of love and the planet of relationship, the planet of one to one interactions, the planet of beauty.

So there was a lot of things happening, and I'm sure you saw this on your show with a lot of deep relational issues coming up with people that was more than just the surface of what's at hand. Maybe things were being triggered from their past because they didn't deal with something 20 years ago and all of a sudden it's back because they never dealt with it.

And the Venus retrograde is gonna be like, we're reaching back and we're going to say, you got to fucking deal with this issue or you're not moving forward in your life in this way. Yeah, and that's true for all issues that we don't deal with. Yeah. See, I just talk about it. And like if you haven't dealt with something like trauma or anything that's happened to in your past, which we all have, what I always say, whatever we resist persisted in, resist dealing with it, it never goes away.

We word, what? Another reword. Right, re! Right, yeah, but that to say, all of these, with astrology and numerology and all of these things, it just provides to go back to it as another layer of consciousness or a lens to look through to self-assess.

And I think that that's really the thing that's so cool. It's like, okay, I'm more, always a little bit more on the skeptic side of things. But if it gives me an opportunity to look and evaluate my life, look at my relationships, look at my day, look at my month ahead, look at my year ahead with a deeper sense of knowing and consciousness, that is such a beautiful thing

to bring into your days. Right. So you kind of take what you like and leave the rest as they say from different localities. Is there anything that you were so psyched about and you're like, this is bullshit, as far as any of the things that you studied or learned. You don't have to mention names.

I would say that I have a little bit of a chip of my shoulder about psychics. No. No. Okay. No, I don't think that it's real. I think that there is a lot that can be gleaned from someone who's highly intuitive, which is what a psychic relish it called themselves.

They're good. It's clear. Highly intuitive people. We are not fortune tellers, and we're not going to predict your life's narrative. We live in a free will universe where everyone makes choices and that is how things move forward And that's how we affect things But an intuition is is interesting and cool and you can have about yourself reflected in that way But anyone that tells you this is what's gonna happen. This is what you're gonna meet

This is what they're gonna look like all that kind of thing just based on like nothing They're intuition their psychic thing. I can't with you. Okay their intuition, their psychic thing, I can't with you. Okay. Okay. No, I'm firing my psychic. Also what I can't do is people, and we see this a lot in no shade, all love, obviously, but anyone who is like celebrity blank in front of them, like celebrity psychic, celebrity astrologist, it's like, you don't have to say that.

No, it only makes you not a celebrity. A lot of people do that. Oh, and they're the right down like, on their Instagram, like, so never like. Or like, an oppressed kid or whatever. It feels like, yeah. It feels like 90s to me. Well, you automatically discredit yourself.

Cause when you become like a celebrity psychic, can you imagine you're a big psychic? Oh my god. So, everybody's psychic. Goodbye. So, yeah, that is just, before you even, why are you so dark? I just think it's dangerous and irresponsible for you to put something into somebody's head.

And then now, like someone's like, you're gonna meet a man and he's gonna look like this and he's gonna do that. And he's gonna be from here. And then everyone else that I meet, if I like them, I'm like, well, you're not that guy. And then I'm missing out on real life experiences because some random fucking person I gave my power away to told me that he's gonna wear a business suit and be from Florida or whatever. Exactly, no, I've got those experiences.

So what have you been doing with psychics? I'm like, that is not true. Why didn't they tell me the black, I went to the psychic like right before I got bit by a black widow two years ago. And I thought the psychic was amazing and I kept listening to it and I was like, couldn't she saw all these things? She didn't see the black widow that could be

having the hospital for a week. I mean, that's a big thing. That's big. Yeah. That could have killed you. That could have killed you. Any other thing that was going to happen. Yeah.

So, okay, so my question that is, what do you think, how has this show helped both of you personally in your personal life? So what you've learned are like in relationships, say like you're single, right? It's after you're dating. Single till I die. I was getting it. But like anything, like do look at even your relationships, how has it affected your personal life?

All these three years now, of interviewing experts, do you feel like how have you guys changed and how does that manifest? How do we, what does that look like? Well, there's two fold one in that we, on like a larger scale, we are our journey, our health, are everything we do in this space with wellness and consciousness. Like we talk about it. So it holds it to a higher standard and it becomes paramount.

And I would say when we started the show, we were interested in things, but I certainly wasn't living my best health. I certainly wasn't on the road that we're on now, where I'm really open to anything. Whereas before, I think I came in with more of a skeptic hat. And then, you know, and on the other side of it is doing something we love and something we created from an idea and having it grow steadily and expand and have a community around the show expand. Like, they always say that, you know, to have confidence, you gotta impress yourself. Like, that's the key to self confidence. Who's there?

Dr. Laura says that. Oh, okay. Dr. Laura. I know. I say so. She said that I have become a lot more confident in myself. I think that it has to do with a doing something I truly, truly believe in in a door. That's one side of it and also being really focused on feeling great.

So like those two things combined have brought me into a place of like I think I'm a great friend and a great partner and really good at my job because I have all of these little components working in my favor, with not without challenge, but that's kind of like this show because it is so health focused and wellness focused and mindfulness focused, like being on my game is primary.

That's a good answer. I love it. And I think you guys, and I'm impressed. You guys are doing great work, really. You started this podcast, you have events, and people come and they love you, and I've not been to one yet, but I want to, but I've seen it on the Instagram,

and I feel like you guys are doing great, great work. Thank you. You're a podcast mom. I am a podcast mom. I said you guys go over, hang on, anytime. It's so fun. Can I add to what she just said? Yes, of course. I have to, you're the next question. Oh, okay. It was to you as well. Oh perfect wonderful

I thought we were one we're like Conjoined one. I just wanted to say that I was impressed to Our coffee. Thank you. Yeah, but now it's your turn. I'm impressed too. Thanks I was gonna say because I don't I don't really think of it as like impressing myself as much as I was just going to say because I don't really think of it as like impressing myself as much as Accepting myself. I think that's I think that's more what the show has given me Tools to get closer to I can remember being a child and never doubting myself and always being confident always just like knowing who I was and then You know the world is is constantly trying to guide you in ways that take you away from yourself.

And all of these practices, whether they be spiritual or whether they be just practical things like exercising and sweating or just things that are normal everyday things, have just led me to a place of being like, okay, I am this human in this body with this soul, in this mind, in this heart. What can I do every day to take care of this body, this being in order to live my most fulfilled life for me? That's a good answer. I just think, I love it.

So what is it that you're doing every day? What could we glean? What would be some things to start up? We want to start on a path like this. Are you, you said sweating. Do you guys go to that sweat place? Shape out. We love sweating. We want to go to shape out. We're bringing out. Okay, not been. No, but they keep, I want to go. You were fast to go. How often do you go? Like twice a week. Stop. Yeah. Okay, and you just sweat for an hour, right? Yeah. And we're doing lymphatic drainage, which is, you put on this like suit, that's like a compression suit, and doing lymphatic drainage, which is the you put on this like suit. That's like a compression suit and it

Lymphatic drainage so hot right now We do it there. Yeah, so the best thing because usually we get manicures We've got yeah, that would be way more Drain and then sweat and then that's like two hours of dream day And you feel after from sweating like I have a steam shower my house detaicing It's just you also your heart rate goes up a bit. Like you're just like really ringing out whatever shouldn't be in there.

Yes. Steam showering is incredible. Well, if I'm not gone though, yeah. I want to go best. We're in. It's a different thing. So is that what you guys, you're meditating every day? I know it's hard every day kind of thing.

I do meditate every day. It took me many years to get to that point, but I kind of think I hacked the system. Would you have to have the system, I mean my own self and resistance? Yeah. I do it before I get out of bed. I know that sounds obvious.

No, that's exactly your, but I wake up in the morning, I sit up while I play with my dog for a second. Even if I look at my phone before, it doesn't matter. I've tried to do the thing where I don't look at my phone. That's challenging. I do it sometimes, I don't do it other times. I try not to be too hard on myself about that.

It doesn't matter. But after a five or 10 minutes, I'm like, all right, this phone's gonna suck me in. You know when you look at your phone and then like all of a sudden it's 45 minutes. You've done jack shit. You lost your whole world. That was nice.

I was gonna go wild about that. It's not a good feeling. The mom called, miss you. I'm like, I'm not. It's like there goes my dad, yeah. So just make sure that before you really let yourself get carried away into the phone, you give yourself, I do 11 minutes and 11 seconds.

I love. I'm trying to sync with the magic of the universe. Yeah. That portal. You know that portal, that magical portal, but, and I just sit up and set my timer. And for me, silent meditation is good. For some people, they need to do a meditation track,

maybe some music, whatever you need to do a meditation track, maybe some music, whatever you need to like get yourself in the focus zone, do it before you get it bad because there's something about getting at it and seeing your house and suddenly you get ramped up into the day, that that little moment of taking care of yourself becomes less and less and less important. The farther you get away from that instant realization that it's the most important thing. So that's why I have to create that. No, I'm totally with you. It's a great hack.

In fact, it reminds you of a hack. I think it was Deepak Chopra. Told me. That means you're actually, not Deepak Chopra. When D and I were up for coffee, no, I read it somewhere and he was like, this is the secret.

And he said, RPM, rise, pee, meditate. Love. So he's like, poo? He's like, wait, can I, or poo? Or poo, and I send it to your doctor. I got a tufur. Yeah. But it's like, rise to your meditate, because it's more like, can I get cough?

No, rise to your meditate. Can I call my friend? No. And then it's kind of like, it's the same thing. Yeah. So that helped me too. That was my hack too. Yeah.

Haven't been as great the last few weeks, but I get unpass on and off. Mostly I do. Most of the time it's okay to get off your habits of think sometimes when you get out of your practices is when you really realize how much they've been helping you. And that's just as much an important part of the journey as doing them is being like, wow, I checked that for granted,

and that's something that I is non-negotiable for me and knowing what your non-negotiables are is really important. Because it's for you, not for somebody else. Exactly. Yeah, and I'll add to that for both of us journaling in the morning is really helpful. We subscribe to morning pages of just, you know, doing a brain dump. Do you handwrite it?

Do you do three pages? Every morning I don't do that. I mean, I keep my drone next to me when I meditate and I'll just write shit down and however much time I have for whatever. But there are some times when I'm like, why do I have to do that. I mean I keep my drone next to me when I meditate and I'll just write shit down and however much time I have for whatever but there are some times when I'm like why I have to do three pages because some shit is working for my mind. For me like right now I really been trying to force myself back into making it a routine so it's at least a page and I try to just like leave it at that and if I'm writing tiny. Great if I'm writing big, great, if I'm writing big, it's too. You know, it's like, whatever. But I think, you know, it's really important,

I think, to do the first two weeks and try to do three pages every day if you're trying to kickstart some type of new creative juice. But if you're just trying to skim whatever off the top layer of your brain before you start the day, like it's so healing, I agree. It's so healing, I agree.

And it's fine, but there's so healing, I agree. I'm sentenced, and it's fine, but there's just something about that practice for me. Like, I'm killing it if I'm meditating and journaling in the morning, one or the other is just as good. Yeah, no, I'm so with you on the journaling. So that's, I'll talk more about that for a second because I, that keeps coming back.

I read the artist's way. Wow. So I, in 1992, for the first time the first time. And then when I moved from San Francisco, I was six years ago, I was cleaning out all my books and I had four copies of it. There I was. I can't buy it. I never really did like I did it when I first got it. And I was like, I'm gonna write and I'm gonna read it. And then I was like, so the morning pages that you have all of our things. And then recently I got back in a therapy because you're never done. And she was like, you should try journaling in the morning. I'm like, God damn it. The morning pages again.

Don't tell me to buy the guy a damn book. I gave it away. But there is a lot. And I know that it's how I started that again. I got my morning journal and I not every day. But I do think that it is very, and that's so tangible. Like everyone's got a notebook and don't do it on your computer. I want to do that. It's there's something about the pen to the paper. And getting it out and being kind to yourself, they've just a page or three pages, because all day long, whatever, I love how you said, skimming off the top.

Like, whatever's in the brain, percolating, when you wake up, get it out. I love those soap owls. The visual of like the pool that collects the leaves and the junk overnight and just needing to like, skim off that junk of the pool, if your brain's a pool. Right?

Yeah, no, you're absolutely right. Those are all really good tools. It's really helpful. And honestly, just those things, breathing, as we said, hydrating, giving yourself a little creative outlet to just work through whatever's going on in your head, everything else is just cake. I love it.

I think. What those things do, I think, more to the point is that journaling is getting you fully cognizant of yourself. That's, I think, a lot of the problem with people is that they aren't in touch with themselves and so that when there is even if it's like a stomach problem or a health problem, they don't even realize it because they're not connected to their own self. So if you're writing in your journal, like, because you know, you're not controlling what you're writing in the morning pages, you're just a free write. So if you're like, okay, I woke up this morning, I have a stomachache. I had a stomachache for us three days. And

then you, you know, you keep doing that. You're like, oh, I have a stomachache. Like you almost need to see yourself. Yeah. And in every self, in order to like, listen and respond. Because the, again, the world is like, you are secondary to what we need you to do. Exactly. So easy to react to the universe rather than be control of it is what you're saying. Yeah. Yeah, no, I think you're absolutely right. So what, that is another great tool that will help us connect to ourselves. Because I do believe so many of us are so disconnected from our bodies, which is what I often

talk about is that that's why we think we don't want sex, need sex for women masturbation. I'm like, you gotta do it. It's gonna connect you that sexual energy. You gotta keep it flowing. And we just don't, we just assume it's not part of us. And so have you found that like a lot of this stuff has helped, like first of all, back up, what do you attribute this disconnection to that you're finding from a lot of people? Do you think it's more so, or do you think it's in condition that the phone?

We're not, we're not sitting with ourselves ever. Like, if your friend is 10 minutes late for coffee, like what, what are you going to do? You're going to pick up your phone. We had a guest, Poppy Jamie, who has an app called Happy Not Perfect on our show, and she explained it really perfectly in that 60 years ago, before like, when people were like moving their bodies for a living, and then people became more stationary. So then people started going to the gym, and they started making time in their day to work out, because people were no longer

moving around as much. Now we're at that part with our brains. We're not using our brain. Yes, you have to, but you're not. But you're not so sure the consciousness to be like, I'm waiting for my friend, I'm not gonna scroll Instagram till they come,

I'm gonna sit, I'm not meditating, I'm just sitting with myself, I'm sitting with my thoughts, I'm observing people walking by, I'm thinking about what's in my head, I'm thinking about yesterday, I'm thinking with my thoughts. I'm observing people walking by. I'm thinking about what's in my head. I'm thinking about yesterday. I'm thinking about tomorrow. I'm engaging with myself and my senses as opposed to immediately. I mean, I truly believe that the phone's

zaps your hypothalamus. I really think that it's like a direct, like soft. What's the hypothalamus? It's like, it's the, it's your third eye. It's like the center of your brain that's connected to it. Oh, it's a wonder where my, it went. Yeah.

I was going to have to hang Shwee for a simple way. I was going to have to hang up with that for a few of you. For sure. Jesus, the cell phone, the toxic. I agree with you. And I can't, I can't stop, right? It's outside my room for a while, but then I clock in my room, whatever.

But I also think, have you set up screen time on your phone? In settings, you can have the apps turn off. So my phone turns off at 10.30 and I have social media set on it. I'm allowed to use it a certain amount of hours a day and it will turn off. You can like, add 15 more minutes manually, but then the apps go black.

It's the most genius thing. I'm so thankful that I want to. What is it called? If you go into your settings, then it's called screen time. I'm going to show it to you. I'm so thankful that I'm full. What is it called? If you go into your setting, uh-huh. Then it's called screen time. I'm gonna show you. Okay, I'm writing it down. Okay.

And then you set it for all of the content that you can and cannot use. Okay, can't do it now. We don't have to tell us we're out of control. Right, no, it's true because I've known you're seeing lately when I'm out and about, like I went to a car dealer, our car fixed, we put whatever place,

and they've shit, and not gonna read their magazines about like mechanics weekly. And so there's no magazines, I thought, well, back in the day you just be sitting there, maybe you talked to someone next to a new observer who's coming in, you maybe you'd look at their other cars or whatever's going on, but now you walk in and there was like six people just staring down there.

And that's wherever it is, wherever you go. And that's how I used to meet people. And used to observe, now it's like, I feel like life is just passing by. It's because we always have this entertainment. And it's interesting the way you just said this is that we are reacting, we're not creating it. We're just like, this is taking us out of ourselves.

We're going to directly, we're putting everything into the stupid goddamn phone. And it's so convenient and great at times, but it's just because it's convenient and great, doesn't mean it should be, it's convenient and great all the time. Like it just isn't. And how do you moderate it? You have to put two of these in place. You have to literally have Apple set it up, but so you have downtime, Apple emits, apps that are always allowed, like you just can kind of like tailor it, and it is probably one

of my favorite things of this year to have been able to like find a solution. This is so good to learn. Do you guys do like a year-end podcast of what you learn this year. Do you? We're doing it. That's so retro. That's with Jeff Ross. He's gonna be our guy. Oh, he's fun Yeah, honey and fun and you're also comedian right Stephanie. You still in comedy? Just being funny all the time Yeah, cuz you started in fashion you guys made a game together Yeah, you guys best friends before yeah, and it Work see because you had the astrologer and all the tools the composer messes up

Composite chart. Yeah, I'm taking notes. No, it's really I mean the next relationship that I get into I will be sure To do that because we're human beings nothing is perfect all the time That's the only thing about all this wellness shit, consciousness, all of this, you're a human being accepted. You're not gonna get over that. You're not gonna transcend that. You're not gonna be perfect. Everything's always gonna be messed up and fucked up

because that's what the human condition. So start with accepting that and then we'll move forward. So in relationships, it's like, you know what? We're not always gonna get along. We're not always gonna see eye to eye. Sometimes things are gonna be hard and we're gonna have to have shitty conversations, but like, don't wanna make that as easy as possible.

Yeah, they don't have, right, exactly. Accepting the fact that life is a series as up and down. I just talked to a friend the other day, she was like, why is this happening to me again? Like, she got another job, didn't work out or something, and she's like, again, things were going so well. And I'm like, this notion that we have that somewhere,

somehow, someday life is going to always be perfect. And there's not gonna be maybe even every day every week, something that's gonna throw you off and be an upset you or be off the track, that is life. That is the process of the ups and the downs and learning how to navigate and negotiate. But I would say to your friend, get your chart red. You're probably bumping up against an issue that you're not aware that you have in your fucking soul.

And because you're not aware of it, it keeps biting you in the ass. So let's make you aware of it. And the chart would just tell you that, like that's a lot easier than that. Literally your chart will be like, okay, I'm going to see my acupuncturist and bring my birthdays. We can deliver the chart. Truly, you are someone who falls, who rubs up against authority. I mean, I don't know, I'm just making that.est and bring my birthdays. We can deliver the chart. Truly, you are someone who rubs up against authority. I mean, I don't know, I'm just making that. Right, right, right.

So whenever there's a thing with authority and you rub up against it, you don't know how to deal with it. So you act out in X, Y, and Z ways because of this, that and the other thing in your chart. Probably because you're the brother. That's someone telling that to you. Yeah. You just be like, oh, I'll never do that again.

Right, or you might, but when you do, you'll know. You'll know. I will never do it in the same way in Right, or you might, but when you do, you'll know. You'll know. I will never do it in the same way in the way that I've been doing it. Okay, that's really... Guys, this is all chock full. It is. I already feel changed just hearing this.

Stop. But that's the thing about this stuff, is that you have to do it. Yeah. You have to stick with the plan. And at least, like, you know, if there's anything I have one more question for you, and then we have actually five questions for you.

Okay. Each guess has to answer five questions for you. Okay. Each guess has to answer our quickie questions. Okay. I love a cookie. I love a cookie, right? And then my question is, if you was, is there anything that you said hacking it, like so you could learn to meditate or run for the journal?

Is there anything that you, because you are talking about a lot of new modalities for people to adapt, is there anything you've learned about people in habits that hasn't, that has worked. I do it's hard. I struggle with it. That has worked. Like that works. Like a habit thing. Like I've heard the things about do everything for a minute.

You don't have to do 10 sit-ups. You could do one sit-up. You could do a free one page of a book if you want to read again. And then eventually you'll add upon that. I think personally for me, it's just my biggest learning curve was making space in my day. It was just allowing there to be time for me to make a meal that will stay she ate me, allow there to be time to sit down and write in my journal, just like giving space so that I can be places on time. Just like, not constantly, like just constantly being ahead of myself was just not helping. So I wasn't making room for me to sit with myself for a second.

And so just like not over scheduling. I know that sounds so silly. No, I've titled, but that's just like the, for me that's the only way that I can stick to a practice or try something new is making my day clear enough to do that. And it's not about like not having responsibilities and not having being at work on time. It's about just like, okay, instead of going to drinks right after work, I'll go home and give myself 30 minutes to get to like sit with myself.

Yeah, that's where, that is lean my bedroom or like whatever needs to happen. Right. That's something I've, yeah, exactly. That is lead. My bedroom or like whatever needs to happen. Right, that's something, yeah, exactly. That is a great, because when you're back to back, you feel like, yeah, you're getting everything done and that brief time is important. I've just learned that as well. That's great. Good, anything for you?

I just think, just not making excuses. Ooh, is the trick. Like, get over yourself. Take a hard look, do your work. If there's something that you feel like you need to be doing, you're not doing it, and you trick. Like, get over yourself. Just take a hard look, do your work. If there's something that you feel like you need to be doing, you're not doing it, and you find yourself in, like, I'm not doing it because of that, I'm not doing it. It's like, no, you're not doing it

because you're making an excuse, you're putting something else in the way of prioritizing your shit. And doing the work is not easy, and it's not fun all the time, and sometimes you do have to be like, fuck, I'm looking over here a lot. What I need to do is take 10 minutes

and make myself a meal, because that's gonna show me that there's nowhere else I need to be like, fuck, I'm looking over here a lot. What I need to do is take 10 minutes and make myself a meal because that's going to show me that there's nowhere else I need to be except for right here. Right. That's a really good advice because I'm always saying do the work, do therapy, but these are, you guys have definitely presented a lot of different types of things. No one is going to use it. Like therapy is great.

I love, I love that we have that available to us. I love we have all these things available to us with the end of the day. It's you and you alone. That's going to get you where you need to go. And if you find yourself just not doing that shit, that's your bad. Yeah. I'll have a nice mom. Sorry to be a tough mom. No, I love it you guys. It's good mom, bad mom. Yeah, I'm the bad mom. Okay, thank you guys. I have questions for you. We can go back and forth. Okay. Okay, so, biggest turn on Elizabeth. Dr. Laura. You're more than me.

You're almost seen in that one. No, I didn't say that. I'm sorry. No, you're not on the same note. You booted Dr. Laura. You're on the same note. She's on a different channel. Yeah, oh, right, right, right.

Okay, sorry, I'm obsessed with that, by the way. Laf, humor. Humor. For sure, for sure, for sure. Biggest turn on. Listening sure for sure biggest turn-off Listening okay biggest turn-off Biggest turn-off bad breath unkempt fingernails. Oh, that's a good one case biggest deal breaker on a date Either one of the rude to the waiter Someone who doesn't ask me one question. It's the worst.

Okay. Biggest deal breaker. Wait, I'm just saying that we said it. I wanna go back. I'll take it back, go back. Getting fingered. I was kidding. You're not kidding.

Don't even say that. I'm like being fingered. No, I love it. Who doesn't love it? I think it's so fun. Right. That thing will finger enough anymore. They, I love it. Who doesn't love it? I think it's so fun. Right. That thing will finger enough anymore. They don't.

They don't do it wrong. They do it wrong. And they don't touch your breasts enough. I agree. I don't like when guys go straight, they just want a straight fuck. It's like, easy does it. Or if they straight want to give you head, it's like no.

Right. Oh great question. Side, no. Yeah. Is it okay to have a call a guy giving head when he's going down on a girl? Yeah, I think because he's, it's his head. Yeah. Is it okay to have a call a guy giving head when he's going down on a girl? Yeah. I think because he's, it's his head.

Yeah. But no. Like boyfriend and I got into a debate about it. He's like, no, because it's referring to the head of the penis. I'm like, no, it's the head of the head. Who's in your head? Yeah, no, you're right.

I think you could say giving head. I've heard it used both ways. Yeah. I also like that it's very generally true. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Okay. Number one sex tip. each one of you.

Be with the person that you're with. Ooh. Okay, man. Cause I have fuck so many people. And I find a lot of times people are like doing their moves and I can tell, I can feel when you're like doing your moves and you're not with me and my personal body and myself

and like I can feel when I'm being like, look what I can do versus me being like, I'm learning about you in this moment. Exactly, because no one's paying attention. Yeah. We're all in our heads during sex, so we're just trying to fit, pull out our move. Yeah.

And you feel that move. I can feel it hard. I'm like, hello. Okay, I got it. You do this, you do that. Yeah, no. So true. I think like not getting out of your own way

to like Feed into like what it is that you really want big set was at your sex tip. Yeah Yeah, like I asked her so long just like being afraid to ask being afraid to say it And it's like so fun to say it and do it guys also I find like love if if especially younger guys now that I'm into younger guys Love when you're like no do, do this. They're like, oh my god, like, well, you know, you want your woman. It's like, yeah, I'm not 25. I can be like, what you're doing. Is it working for me? And I like it like that. Because I think when you get into your 30s, maybe it hopefully people listening in their

20s, we can get it now, is that I used to assume that my partner knew more than I did. I don't know. And they don't know anything. And they're so grateful when you give them a little. They're like, thank God I have to like flail around and try to figure it out. Men are so adaptable in that way. Yeah, they were incredible. They're credits. Okay, I sent that puts you in the mood. Sandalwood. Palo Santo. Oh my god, I know you guys have to answer that. Okay, thank you guys so much for hearing that. So retrogradegrade. I'll lose with God. Stephanie Sambari, you have to check other podcasts that's so retrograde and then they are,

watch the space because they are coming soon. Yeah, and we wanna come back to talk about fucking. Yeah, we'll talk about fucking next time I swear to God. Okay, thanks guys for being here. Thanks for having me. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. I'm so happy for you guys.

Congratulations, I'm very proud of you. To you as well. Thank you. All right guys, hope you enjoyed the show. I'll see you in 2019. What a great year it's been, and I can't wait for the next one. Thanks to my amazing team, Ken, Sarah, intern Michelle, producer, Jamie, and Michael.

Was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithemily.com. Emily.com.