Sex With Emily - Sex Party 101

Episode Date: March 21, 2023

Have you ever been to a sex party? Are you curious about what goes down in one, and if it’s something you’d like to explore? Are they held in dungeons? Upscale clubs? Someone’s house? There’s a lot more interest in sex parties lately, so on today’s episode, I’m talking sex parties 101. I’ll go over the various types of parties out there, how to find them and specific sex events you might be interested in, sex party etiquette, what you can expect when you walk in the door, how to interact with fellow attendees, and of course…what to wear. Show Notes:The 7 Secrets of Making OutHow to Have the Sexiest Spring EverPRE-ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your PleasureFetLifeFeeld#OpenKinky Rabbit ClubMorgasm CBD Arousal Lubricant (code EMILY for 15% OFF sitewide) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's a big thing that I've seen in couples too. And also with my partner, I just even just being there. That experience is fodder for weeks to come, months to come. What we saw, what we did, that could be enough too, just that we went to this erotic performance together. It was like you watched a porn together. You saw a hot scene in a movie, but you actually add a party experiencing it. You're listening to Sex with Emily.

I'm Dr. Emily and I'm here to help you prioritize your pleasure and liberate the conversation around sex. So if you've been to a sex party, are you curious about what goes down in one and if it's something you'd like to explore? Are they held in dungeons, upscale clubs, someone's house? They're a lot more interested in sex parties lately, so on today's episode, I'm talking Sex Parties 101. I'll go over the various types of parties out there, how to find them, specific sex events you might be interested

in, sex party etiquette, what you can expect when you walk in the door, how to interact with fellow attendees, and of course, what to wear. Intentions with Emily for each episode, I want to start off by setting an intention for the show and I encourage you to do the same. My intention is to give you some education on sex parties and if you've never been before, they can understandably feel intimidating. But by the end of this episode you'll have all the data you need to go exploring if you're curious or know that it's something that you'd better leave to your imagination. Please rate and review Sex with the Emily wherever you listen to the show, my new articles, the seven secrets to making out and how to have the sexiest spring ever

is up at sexwithemily.com. Check out my YouTube channel, social media, and TikTok. It's all at sexwithemily, for more sex tips and advice. And if you want to ask me questions, do it. Leave me your questions or message me at sexwithemily.com. slash askemily or call my hotline 559 talk sex or 559 825 577 39. You can always include your name, your age,

where you live, and how you listen to the show, and of course you can change your name or choose your main anonymous. Real quick, I'm coming out with a book. And I am so excited about this book. It's been two years. I've been working on it to bring it to all of you, and it can be in your hot hands. It's called Smart Sex, how to boost your sex IQ, and own your pleasure, and it can be in your hot hands. It's called Smart Sex, how to boost your sex IQ and own your pleasure. And it's coming out June 13th. You can pre-order the book right now, which is really important. I would just love if you all pre-order the book.

It really helps with sales, get the book out there to more people. Pre-order it right now at sexlimate.com. Just go to the drop down menu, select new book, it'll be easy from there. All right, everyone, enjoy this episode. A sexual pleasure starts to become more normalized and celebrated. I'm getting more and more questions from all of you on a very hot topic and that is sex parties. I think it's been

a while since I have talked to you all about sex parties, what's happening, you know, why are there happening? A lot of couples are looking to spice up their sex life. They want to fulfill fantasies, you know, maybe they want to find partners with similar sexual interests or kinks. And in some cases, or many cases, this is part of a consensual, non-monogamous lifestyle choice. Fun. So on today's episode, I'm going to demystify sex parties for you.

So you can see if there's something you like to explore, or maybe you just have always wondered what actually happens at a sex party, and what does that mean? And I'm going to share some of my own experiences. So before I get into that, I just want to give you a little background on sex parties. So I think they're very misunderstood or they get a bad rap. So let's start with like what a sex party is not. Now when you think of sex parties, you probably think you walk in and you have to be naked or you drop your pants at the door, you walk into a room and there's a pile of naked

bodies riding around or jeez happening and that's just, you know, if you sign up for sex party, you're going to have to jump into an orgy. And you're signing up for sex. You might not have, you know, any say in the matter, but sex is going to happen. And that's not really the case. I have to say parties that are done right, they're like very open, non-judgmental, shame free environments where everybody's there for pleasure and to experience some really healthy sexual pleasure. I mean, thank you for this fight. It's much like going to karaoke party, right?

You can invite to a karaoke party and you know that you don't have to sing. No one's saying like you have to get up on stage and you might just love going because you love watching other people sing their karaoke songs. Now, perhaps you're watching and you secretly have a song that you know you want to sing. Like, if I ever did it, I would do this song.

And maybe you sit there thinking, and maybe you also are saying, maybe I will. Maybe I'll get enough courage and I'll get up there and sing. But you know that also if you don't, totally fine, and everyone had a good time. And sex parties feel the same way. You know you're all there with the possibility of sex happening, either around you, in front of you, with you. So that's the vibe of a sex party.

Sex is gonna happen, but there's no pressure. So a lot of sex parties are based on a more kink lifestyle. Finding a play partner to do a sex scene with or have sex with or you know maybe you're swapping or you're swinging or if you're meeting other people there. The kind of sex phrase that I'm talking about have a process where you are vetting the list of people, you're looking at the applicants, you're making sure that everybody is there

for consensual sex, that they follow by the rules. The rules are usually you asked before you touch. You have to be there with a partner that's also consenting. So usually these are places that you're really going to go there and everyone there is with the intent to get their needs met. And somewhere you can cost you $20 a ticket, somewhere more exclusive at thousands of valor ticket. You could organize a sex party tonight.

In your living room, if you want to, that would be called a sex party. Maybe invite your neighbors over and you all have sex. But again, I want to remind you that you don't have to have sex. You could just go in and watch with your partner, watch alone. If they're allowing single people to come, because a lot of these parties over the years, and again, they're always evolving. But the ones I went to, or the ones I know about mostly are with couples and single women. Sorry guys, but again, it's changing. Every town gets to decide what kind of sex party they have.

But for many couples, they go just to watch and do not necessarily participate and they might find that it's really huge turn on and they're using a dirty talk later in the bedroom. Alright, so who's going to these sex parties? Well, they're not for everyone, really. And I know I'm not wasting that every couple should go to a sex party. It's for couples who have excellent healthy communication. Meaning you talk about your emotions, your feelings,

you deal with jealousies, it comes up, and you're in a place to really explore your sexuality together. That's the key, it's together. And you're looking to experience aulsion, which is term that describes couples that are really able to experience happiness for their partner when they experience pleasure. So your partner has a fantasy and you actually are

in a state of compulsion when you know your partner is getting their needs met. And it's okay if you're not the one giving. You know, for example, your partner went to a fantasy that you don't feel comfortable fulfilling yourself. Maybe you're like, you know what? I never want to wear spandex.

I never want to spank someone. I don't want to be tied up, but my partner wants to be tied up. Maybe you go to party together and someone else can fill that fantasy. And since you love your partner and you care for your partner, you are happy they're getting that need back.

What I love is that most people who are going to show up at a sex party are open-minded, they want to be in judgment-free, safe space to explore, and just experience sex in a different way. And there's many different types of sex parties, and I will get to how to find them shortly because I know you all wanna know that. A lot of time sex parties are organized by a sex club

or a sex toy store or an individual organization or groups of people. Sometimes there's annual or monthly memberships for sex clubs or a sex toy store or an individual organization or groups of people. Sometimes there's annual or monthly memberships for sex clubs or one time feed. Some of them are called play parties, right? And play parties are a little bit more focused on the kink, BDSM lifestyle where you're going to see whippying and vlogging and restraints and dungeons. Think of eyes wide shut 50 shades of gray. There's also cuddle parties, which have been around for almost 20 years.

What I love about cuddle parties is you're going there to learn the skills that make touch, safe, and enjoyable without the pressure of sex. You're learning boundaries and consent. Let's talk about less formal sex parties, if you will. Swinging parties. Swinging essentially means that couples get together and there's an expectation of partner swapping. And so swinging parties can be very informal.

They can, you know, like the key parties everyone talked about in the 70s. They can take place at someone's house where like everyone puts their keys in a bowl. Then they select one and this will determine who they hook up with. I got the keys to your car. It means you might be having sex with that person that night. Or they can be more organized, expensive, like a swing or a cruise or a lifestyle cruise. Different ways to find it, but you'll know when you see lifestyle, there's going to be some swinging happening. Alright, so let's get into some of your questions.

I know right now you're wondering, how do I find all these sex parties? Well, a lot of people are going to the apps and social networks or it's word of mouth. I mean, I found out my first sex party years ago by talking to the people at good vibrations and San Francisco, so be sure to ask around to your local sex toy store. That would be a place to start. But some of the like apps that people are going to, one is FET LIFE. FET LIFE is an OG social networking site for sex-pods and information, BDSM, Kink, Swinger, great way to find local events in your area. There's also Field, Fe-ELD. It's an open-minded dating app for Nominogmi, Pali-Amory, Alternative Relationships, Casual Sex, Kink, etc. And then there's Hashtag open.

That's another dating app, more explicitly focused on Nominogmi. They also have really fun virtual events from time to time. You can learn things like sex party etiquette. Okay, so I went to a really awesome sex party in LA. As I mentioned, there's a lot of different kinds of sex parties. This one was a little more exclusive. I'm going to get into it shortly with the founders, but when I got there, you walk in and what I love is you have to give up my phone. Someone went in there to take your phone. And my partner and I came, we were dressed. It was suggested that the men were tux, so he was wearing a tux and I was wearing like a really cool dress. I actually wore it at the podcast hall of fame words that you can find on my Instagram from last year. But it was a really great dress. It was comfortable, but it was kind of like a combo bathing suit, laundry, black formal dress, all in one.

So we walk in and it's a really sexy vibe. It was the the venue was a hotel lobby bar because they rented out a boutique hotel. So every room had a different theme, but overall it was very elegant, tastefully appointed with very like sexual and sexual elements and everyone was really welcoming and open, dressed in everything. I mean, you saw people lingerie and dresses, you know, in costumes and tucks, like sexy attire, and essentially it's whatever made them feel sexy. And obviously it was just really liberating and exciting to see people playing and finding pleasure in so many ways. And yes, there was sex happening. They rented out a boutico tell for that purpose. So throughout the night, there were different rooms, and you could walk

by the rooms and the doors were open to see kind of sex unfolding in different ways. There might be some couples, maybe individual people, having sex, oral sex? Just all different expressions. In fact, there was a sex toy room, which I found my way to. Of course, and there was a woman riding a Sibian, which is like a massive saddle of a horse, but the whole thing is a vibrator. And she was in the middle of bed,

and she was on the Sibian, and there were some women around her. There were friends or play partners, and they were like showing her how to use it, and she wrote it, and she had this orgasm, and then she came then she came off and she's like turned this woman and after she's like Oh, hi. Oh my god. I love your dress Where'd you get that necklace from? So it was like very casual like having sex to you look great tonight What's going on here? You know there wasn't a lot of like really

Intense talk happening, but people were all there. This is where the section liberated people are coming to People were all there. This is where the sexually liberated people are coming to have pleasure. There was a room with more kinky gear, bondage gear. So there's a lot of different things happening. And also like you look over, when you get in, and there's this man who's one of the leading Shibari rope tying experts in the world.

And he's beautifully has a woman on a bed and he is tying her in a really sensual hot way. He's the experts the way he's like using the ropes for his pleasure and her pleasure is something I will never forget. I'm not sure I'll ever forget this night. So I thought I would peel back the curtain to bring you inside all of their sexual experiences.

I wouldn't be talking to Alina Vertuska. She's a creative director, event planner, designer, she's a stylist and founder of Rocka Sheik. It's a fashion brand known for its elaborate theme events. Ayal Brickman is an entrepreneur and a Linus husband. He's founded several different companies, but now he focused on Kinky Rabbit Club and men's sexual wellness. Oh, lastly, for Against Interview. I mentioned one of my new favorite products

for enhancing my sexual experience during the episode, and I just wanted to real quick tell you about it because I'm obsessed with it. It's more orgasm CBD arousal lubricant. It's CBD infused lube 100% hypoallergenic oil free and here's my love it is a 2 in 1. You get a lubricant and an arousal gel. It has all natural ingredients like alhargine that increases blood flow and helps reduce inflammation because of the CBD. What I love is that it's a dual action for penis and lava owners. It can increase the rousal for penis owners.

You just rub it down the shaft all over the penis and throw both owners and increases orgasm intensity and can help with dryness and pain and discomfort. I love orgasm. Check it out. You can get 15% off more. Guys and Lou, if you use code Emily at more guys and dot com slash sex with Emily, that's m-o-r-g-a-s-m dot com slash sex with Emily, just use code Emily and get 15% off. All right, everyone. Let's get into the interview. What is kinky rabbit club?

I always like to say it's Disneyland for adults. You like basically you come in and then you just have fun. Basically we have a private members club. With a lot of amazing individuals. Very exclusive. We focus on exclusivity. This is the most important thing for everyone to feel comfortable and feel that they can just do whatever they want around people

that never going to judge them. Basically, like, mind that people, extremely exclusive, everyone's keep asking me all the time, how can we get in? We're going to talk about later. We're going to talk about that because this is what your website says, exclusive members club hosting a collection of unique kinky themed events throughout Los Angeles music dance erotic theater immersive art becomes tools of seduction designed to transport you to a world of luxury and the ultimate indulgence with all with your discretion in mind so that's what it is it's a fun people we call it like a sex party or a lifestyle event. You look always like sex party is like a bed word or swing as party. It's not the right word.

A lot of people are afraid of this. Like they, they use sex party or swing as, we not really It's swing as party. But I mean, it's not a, it's not a bed word. There are a lot of Swingers parties, but we are not one of them. Yes. There are a lot of swingers parties, but we are not one of them. We've been to many in the past when we just met and we just didn't feel comfortable, the energy and the vibe, but there are great people over there and the swingers would be been around for centuries, but it's not us. It's definitely not us. But they always have the same reputation after you come in comment it's more like a dungeon type of field

and like that's not what I think you have in the club is we have a lot of different experiences it's sometimes the vibes are darker and like mysterious other times it's more fun and disco and like you know can dance so it's always very it's like an adventure you always always go in like on a journey. Yeah, it's so it's more of an experience that obviously the end most of the people gonna have sex but It's more of an experience for people to come and enjoy. I call it like a long for play which people tend to forget about for place and just go directly to sex which makes it so boring because What's the fun part about it? It is something before that that people can get aroused and meet other people at the beginning.

They're not jumped right away to have sex. They watch a show. We have the ambience around. They can have a drink. They can meet other people. And usually after midnight, which is the main show, most of the times, there's like this. I would say it's a magic that everyone disappears

and goes to the rooms and have fun. And after they can go back have a drink then do it all over again or even explore all kind of things or that Alina have in her mind so it's not just right jump into sex because this is what we didn't like. Yeah the pressure I didn't like the pressure when we were going to like other clubs where I was like fed like, oh, like everyone expects you to just get naked and like have sex right away. So this way, like, you come in, you're just like, you don't have to have anything, you don't have to have sex, you don't have to be anything, you're just like, watch the shows, have conversations, a drink, and that's it. Yeah, and usually I was at the number of three, which is usually takes around three parties for newbies to come in.

Watch everything. Then usually after the second party, they were probably going to have sex, but in front of other people or next to others. And then the energy is going to start flowing. And the third party, you're going to see probably in the mix between so many naked bodies having a lot of fun. But it's all about the energy. It's like it's just the right vibe.

We are very selective with the gas. We know who to invite, who's who's fitter, who doesn't. What are the characteristics? Are there like three traits of a couple that should go? And then who are the couples that shouldn't go? Couple who have a broken marriage, definitely shouldn't go. You know what? No, I wouldn't say that. I would say I would give them a chance to just how it depends how broken it is. I think the most important thing is communication. If you have a clear communication with your partner, so it's much easier to go to those type of parties. And back to the question and the question

about the application, is that we feel that the dynamic within the couples, because it can be a time that a guy wants to come to those parties just to have sex with multiple women and just leave his wife or his girlfriend on the side just that's horrible and it's always end up very bad. So, first of all, you can't be jealous, that's the first and foremost, because we met some guys that even by some other couple were talking to their two-ies partner, who are so jealous. So that's obviously not the award. They have to be some sort of communication

between one another and understanding that, hey, we're going to explore, we don't have to do anything. I wouldn't say we have to come with rules, because when we went to our first party, we said, oh, we have these rules and this rule and that rule, it was broken into some rules. I mean, many rules for sure. Yeah.

You know, no gangbangs on the first part. Why not? No gangbangs. Gangbangs is a third party. One of the fits, one of the fits, okay, between you two. Yeah, no expectations. Just come with open mind. And like I said, communication.

If you don't have any communication with your partner, it's going to be very hard for you. And also, very important is that explain your partner where you're going Because we had the few cases that they didn't explain the partner exactly what it is But it wasn't really like they went into a long relationship We have some couples as well that are just like I don't know friends with benefits Not like you know look like long-term couples or like they're just like friends Yeah, and then but they have a great connection. So it works too, you know, it looked like a long-term couple. So like, they're just like friends, yeah. And then, but they have a great connection.

So it works too, you know. So it really depends. I talked to a couple there and they were wonderful. They just said that they had been married for like 20 years. They have kids and they were very communicative and they realized their sex is kind of flatlined. It just wasn't as exciting anymore. And they talked a lot about it.

And they said it just kind of really sparked their sex life. They were re-immigrated. What I loved is that I wasn't sitting around their interview people, I was actually having a good time. But when I did talk, and they were saying that they both figured out she was more into playing with other men, and he just wanted to watch, and he wasn't really doing anything,

but it was more for her. And then there was other couples that she wanted to be with men. He wanted to be with women, but then, they were together, but they had to talk about it. And so there's all these different iterations of couples that she wanted to be with men, he wanted to be with women, but then they were together, but they had to like talk about it ahead of time. So there's all these different iterations of couples that come there. And that's why you can't have rules and you might not even know until you go. Because I think what you peel back the layers of like what's right and what's wrong and what society says, then these kind of clubs gives people the opportunity to kind of figure it

out when they get there, even if they don't know, or if they even have a hunch, right? What might be hot for them? So you've probably heard some, you know, but couples have let you know. Many, many stories. The same stories of like what you heard that we have so many couples that started, you know, been together for so many years. And life became, you know, reality that everyone's like work

and regular life less sex and even we a few couples that wanted to separate and then they came to our clubs and they just kind of fell in love with each other again and they didn't even do much at the club but they just fell in love with each other because they felt so strong even coming to this kind of club. I want to get more into the member experience after that like what it is for, but let's just talk about the do-and-don'ts. Like what's the general etiquette? My number one, be respectful.

Always ask before anything, just like communication. Yeah, communicate better with your partner and with others. That's a very important thing. Obviously, we're very big on privacy, So it's kind of like fight club. Don't talk about fight club outside because, you know, there are some people that just don't want, you know, because they're afraid of the society norms and so on. So we really like to keep it between each other.

And that's why we hardly talk into people outside about a club and everything. Obviously we're never gonna expose any names or anything like that. Because, you know, we respect everyone, the same as their respect. Yeah, we take the phone, so it's like... Yeah, no phones in there. To me, that was an incredible experience ago there, and that had my phone. So I was like, okay, well, what about privacy and all that?

Like, people really are there too. Like, if they get through the layers, they jump through the hoops, they get into the club, you guys invented them. It's like, so you already feel safe and then to not have your phone for a few hours. First off, I wish I could do that on a daily basis not be with my phone, but to be at a party like this

and to not have your phone is so, so liberating. That's another layer of people feeling free and being open. I'd love to know now like more about the relationships because I think okay people like oh my god I want to go to the sick. I think this really is a fantasy. You know I've been in this world for so long so thinking like what is asking people I was like what would you want to know? I'm mostly were saying like I want to know what happens and the sex happens and a lot of the thing like I could never do that. I'd be so jealous. My partner would never let me go. Is it just an excuse for couples to go bang other people?

Right? So what do you, if you could tell me, and maybe yes, with consent. So what do couples get out of this gathering? And then we could talk about what singles get out of it. But let's talk about couples. Like, I kind of shared one experience and, you know, I have a hunch that maybe you could share

what you've observed over the years, and what people tell you that they get out of it. The couples who get in the door, you know, become members. Well, for a number one stronger connection. Yeah. Yeah. Right when you enter the door, you feel so strong and empowered with your couple that you can, that you made this move to go to something like that. That's the first thing. And then you explore together a lot of things because majority of the people that comes to our party, they don't live in the outer world that it's based on a lot of lies and people divorce and cheating on one another in our community.

In our world, you don't need that. You're basically very open with one another and that makes the relationship so strong. And that's why, like I said before, we have couples that started in, when they joined the club, they started, so a little bit separated in a way, because of the so many years that have been together, and you see how they evolve and learned a lot about one another, and became so strong with one another,

that they're just waiting to come back to the club and they don't go anywhere else. So that makes us very happy, basically. That's what we are aiming for. I think that you go to a club and you have, I would say, 90% of the people are so in line with your energy and your vibe and hugging and kissing it. It's not just about sex. Sex is just, you know, like something that you obviously that you want to explore and everything, but it's not just like its connection between people. It's like you said no form. Yeah, not just couples even.

Like Pia, you say people, let's talk about it. Let's talk about it. The other people, the performers, let's talk about that. Yeah. Single men can single men go. Single men are not allowed. The only ones that are allowed in the way it's the people who obviously perform with us. So we know them in advance, but we don't allow single guys.

Because we've been to other clubs before and we saw that it doesn't fit yet. Maybe in the future, who knows, but it just don't fit the energy doesn't fit. And for single ladies, I found, because I talk to a lot of single ladies and hours, I can why you come in here. Like, what's your expectations? What do you want to get from coming here? And all of them, you know, honestly say that it just feels so powerful here

and they feel so safe to do whatever they want. There's something in there. That being judged. Yeah, there's something in the society that a woman can be sexual and can be, you know, can be open about the sexuality. So when the girls come to a club they feel so strong and so powerful they are the one who in control much more than the guys of the couples or they're actually. So that's great. That's

what we always tell them. Just explore and enjoy do whatever you want. No one's gonna judge. All right, I hate to interrupt because I'm sure you're all at the edges of your sea right now. We're going to take a quick break for our sponsors and then we'll be right back to the interview. I would love to talk about some of the relationship dynamics that you see there. Swinging, I guess, is a type. Swinging is when couples kind of swap or people are open or they're only with women or the only with men or the only with trans people.

I think everyone gets it aside, but are there common dynamics that you think, what do you see here? What could be other certain genres that we have? I think there's a lot of couples that we like to play with other girls. It's kind of like in the middle of couples who like to play with other girls. And the couples who like to play with other couples. We do have some that he likes to see her with other guys. And it makes him so powerful because he's seeing her basically having fun, which is, I don't see anything

read about it, it's amazing. It takes a strong guy to be very strong. Very strong. Not everyone can do it. Unfortunately, there's this judgment of, I don't know the shame or judgment or anything like that, but if you think about it, you basically look in and on the person, the person who you really love having fun, what's so bad about it. But it's society that's drilled down with us when we are born. But yeah, it's kind of like in between couples who play with couples and couples who play with girls or even couples just like to play with one another and then to have others watching them. For years under one side or exhibition is on the other side. And it's a big thing that I've seen with couples too. And also with my partner, I just even just being there, that experience is fodder for weeks to come, months to come.

Like what we saw, what we did, like that could be enough too, just that we went to this erotic performance together. It was like you watched a porn together, you saw a hot scene in a movie, but you actually add a party experiencing it. And it does sort of enhance intimacy, can bring couples together. But what are the common fantasies that come up for couples? Is there anything you read on every application like 9 out of 10? Oh yeah, there is actually. Yeah, there is. It's a lot of them are like BDSM, so it goes hand to hand with 50 shots of grey. Because it was so famous, the book was so famous, so it goes hand to hand with what we see on the kinks and the fetishism.

A lot of light BDSM, women's like rapesins, which is very, very strange. Yes. There was very strange for me. And on the other side. Concentral non-concentral sex. And the guides wants to be the dominant of course. So it's basically goes into what's feminine and masculine energy are. So we see that a lot other than that. No, we have, we have people that like, D.P. I don't know, there's everything. Nothing's so crazy. No.

I mean, what's crazy? Yeah, exactly, what's crazy? That's the thing. I'm not even going to ask, if people wanted me to ask, what's the craziest thing you saw? I'm like, I don't love when people ask me. What's the craziest question you've ever gotten? Now, the mouse I reached, I'm like, nothing is even,

because it's all OK. So I don't see it that way. Well, it's the taboo, right? Well, nothing's ever going to say, I guess, bringing in things that we've ever done. Oh, it in things that we Never should think so sacred as long as it's under Consent. Yeah, as long as it's with respect and with consent for one another. No one there's no one who is actually Get offended or anything like that there. They're sitting in a very fun way and the experience and that's eventually I think what we hear for we have to experience things in life. We're not here to wake up everyone and go to work, you know, and come back and buy stuff.

We hear to experience things, especially with their loved ones or single ladies who just want to experience something that they would never experience outside when they're going to go to any regular party. Yeah, and it's all a theater. Like, life is a... Life is a theater. Life is a... It should a theater, life is a... It should be, it should be more so. Also, when I loved, there was also,

because I was talking about sex change, it was like a room with like sex toys that were sanitary and lobes and condoms and all that. And I did mention the next time I do, I wanna bring some loop for everybody. I think I gave you guys some to try, but then there's the other one that I love. It's called Morgasm, and we bring it to you as a surprise.

It's an arousal loop and you rub it on. It's an arousal lube and you rub it on. It's like a little fun prop that when you put it on your body to start to arousen like tingle like your, your clitorisial penis. Have you ever used any of those? Some of the guests, you know, you can, you can lube them. You can lube them.

You can lube them. Can I lube people? I'm gonna call it, it's kind of like when you go to Burning Man and everyone has their value. Like I'm just gonna rub some around some jelly on everybody. It's called orgasm, it's a very cool experience. I love that it's judgment free too. I think that people can partake without feeling the pressure.

What would you advise when you get people who want to dip their toe into this world? But they're not quite ready for a party yet. I can say that when we started all these years ago when we just met, actually when when we met we start talking about it And there was not too many options out there I can definitely said it that when Alina started her world in you know to create in this world Slowly started we start seeing so many small but like I said swingers club

They're very hard for swingers club. There's a lot of dating apps that are that fit exactly to the narrative, but there are a lot of apps out there. You can just search it. It's very easy. There's a lot of small local parties that you can just go and see what's going on. Obviously, you don't have to do anything anywhere. But there's a... You don't have to. It isn't for everybody. That's what I want to say. It isn't for everybody, right? This isn't. We're not saying it. I want people, I guess the reason why I'm bringing the seal

is I want people to have options. I want them to know that there's possibilities for you to expand your intimacy and to connect on a deeper level with a partner and just know that there's opportunities for it, but by no way is it for everybody. There's some people can't even get past jealousy. But yeah, let's say no good relationship between one another. It's not for everyone, obviously.

But on the other side though, if people just want to come have fun and like, you know, explore and like, again, they don't need to do anything. It was coming up a drink, a fun, enjoy the music, you know, like that. And watch a live other people have insights in every fun. Right, you don't have to do anything, which I love that there was like a low pressure environment, just to experience and to really just kind of go into your own experience of essentiality and eroticism and turn-ons. If anything, you leave with just great fodder for discovering yourself. It's really great work you're doing and I think it's important

and I just love people to say like even if you aren't ready to go to a party tonight, after you're listening to this talk to your about just, what do you think about that? Would that be hot? Maybe you could find some porn that shows people out of party, right? I always tell people like before they jump and ever get through some or swinging, walk dirty, talk it to each other,

watch a porn, find an erotic scene that you can think about and how did that make us feel. And so it's a journey, right? I don't think you'll have to go. Even at your parties, people aren't coming and they're learning and coming for a few times and they're experiencing it. The funny thing is, it's a journey, right? I don't think you'll have to go. Even at your parties, you people aren't coming and they're learning and going to coming for a few times and they're experiencing it. The funny thing is it's really like fight club. When you go out, when you're part of this community, you just know who is part of it and who is not. It's so magical. So

this is something that we're really like, yeah, you just see the dogs. I love that you exist. I think it's really unique. It's really special. I'm just grateful to know both of you So thanks for bringing me on for the journey and sharing this with everybody I want to ask you guys real quick before we go I have to ask you the five quicky questions. We ask all of our guests, okay very quick and You can each answer you can go back and forth Just like one word or two words. What's your biggest turn on?

Elena Elena like one word or two words, what's your biggest turn on? Alina. Alina. Alina. Wow. I always think here. Okay. You can say. Thank you. What about Alina?

What's your question? I'm in this world and a lot of guys tell me always such a lucky guy. She's the one who turned me on the most. No matter when and even when she was obviously pregnant, even she's like on the worst day of her life, she always turned off. Alina, what's your biggest turn off? Well, I have to say, yeah. Okay, okay, I got it. Okay, what's your biggest turn off?

Turn off? I never thought about it, but it has to be quick, you have to be quick. I would say that the lies are my biggest turn off. I hate people who lie. What makes good sex? That's a question? Yeah, it's a question. Communication.

Just dirty talk, meditation. Very talk, kid. This is going to do it together. Something you would tell your younger self about sex and relationships. Just go and fuck. I mean, I'm very lucky that I started in a very young age to explore so many, especially all the women's when I was very young. So they taught me basically, I would say just respect and love and do it from love. Don't do it from sex. Sex is so easy.

You can have sex, I can have sex with myself right now, but But also have experience and fun With with with some with like something in inside not just just come and have sex. It's so boring Yeah, how many you know feel do it for the feeling? Yeah, yeah, that's really what you guys are creating you're creating an erotic experience Everyone can have like pound away and have sex, but this is a much different experience. Don't waste your own time. It's just like that. That's fun.

Final question, what's the number one thing you wish everyone knew about sex? It's actually fun and everyone's doing that. That is beautiful. Everyone's doing sex. I have to say, everyone, everyone in their life had sex. I love it. We think about it.

It's like restaurants. Everyone eats. So you guys are creating it. We're in a sex. Everyone eats like, create your creating another life head sex. I love it. I think it's like restaurants, like everyone eats, so you guys are creating, we're in a sex, everyone eats like, create your creating another take on sex. Like it's another way to experience this beautiful thing that everyone experiences anyway. Yeah. You have a different menu.

Yeah, thank you. And I love it. Thank you both for being here. I appreciate you both. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. That's it for today's episode. See you on Friday. Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. Be sure to like, subscribe, and give us a review wherever you listen to the podcast and share this with a friend or partner. You can find me on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter at Sex with Emily. Oh, I've been told I give really good email. So sign up at sexwithemily.com. And while you're there, check out my free guides and articles for more ways to prioritize your pleasure. If you'd like to ask me about your sex life,

dating, or relationships, call my hotline 559 Talk Sex. That's 559-825-5739. A go to sexwithemily.com slash Ask Emily. Special thanks to ACAST for powering the Sex with Emily podcast. Was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithemily.com. you