Sex With Emily - Sex, Poptarts & Threesomes with Comedian Adam Ray

Episode Date: July 24, 2014

Comedian Adam Ray stopped by the studio to talk sex (of course) and share other stories of debauchery with Emily and Anderson. From dropping out of football to play the lead in Grease to getting kicked out a comedy club for dropping the C-Word, to landing the role of lead villain in the popular comedy The Heat, Adam tells the tale of how he cracked his way into show business to his new release Poptart Suicide.The gang discusses Emily’s world of sexual innuendos (and everything in between). Adam spills his spiciest sex story, which leads to a lengthy discussion on threesomes. Want to know how to make a threesome work? Emily gives tips & Anderson shares a story of what happens when threesomes go bad. Then Adam answers the sex question all comedians get: Do people expect you be funny in bed?Emily and Adam bond over tales of their adorable Jewish mothers, and the dudes explain why young boys are essentially “walking boners with feet”. Then they move on to the logistics of old people sex, shower sex and the importance of down-there hair maintenance.From turn-ons and turn-offs to sexual bucket lists to crossing the line with Oprah, no topics are off limits in this episode! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome everyone to a brand new episode of Sex with Emily tonight's show. We have comedian Adam Ray and as you know I talk about products on the show and I only bring in products that I believe in and that I know are going to help your life. And so that is why I have to tell you I love my No No Pro because I've spent so much time and money on razors and waxing and the No No Pro is the best way to remove unwanted hair with no pain. You can do it at home. I do it at home. I do it at my desk.

You can do it everywhere. And it's for men too, because men, they've got hair in places and there was like, I don't know what to do, but I like women. And there's like a waxing salon every corner of my neck. But men are like, where do the hair in my back or on my neck? And what do you do?

Use the NONO Pro. Because it works. It works because it's, let me just, it goes over your skin. Yeah, it just goes over your It works because it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it goes over your skin. Yeah, it just goes over your skin, you charge it, and it just zaps those hairs, and it does not hurt. Painless, amazing.

And you can check it out. No No Pro comes with a hundred percent, 60 day money back guarantee, and when you purchase it, you'll get a $50 gift card to an award-winning skin care line. Go to NoNoEmily.com that's NoNoEmily.com. Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Betrubize they call them in a fight on day. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute.

The girls got a hair stand. Oh, my. The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common moment? What do you mean, like laundry? It shrinks. Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me?

Oh, my god. What's your sound? I'm born. Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between for more information. Go to sex with Emily.com.

Check out my website. Because it's awesome. We post every day. We give you information to improve your sex life and your relationship, which is why you're listening to the show. Yo, right. Hey Anderson. Yo, what's up, Anne?

How you doing? I'm just chilling here. You're just chilling on just chilling on the flip side kicking it. Oh my God. I just almost got some M&M's for dinner for my you probably should do that. I know blood sugar running danger to the low I know this keeps having it's been it's been it's been I told you a crazy day You know what this what happens when people have sex all day long for Exactly. I like ate toys throughout today and I didn't have time to even get water because they were so freaking good Is that how you sing such a shit just banging yourself? Do you think I work out? Why do you think I don't just so I'm cuz I've like putting in new batteries and charging things and looking for

Chargers plug in and the wall thing you even make Plugging things in to the wall sexual Listen to you Look into the wall. That's so sexy Emily. So Anderson um I have to tell you, after your show, your after-disaster podcast live show. Oh, yeah, at the improv. The sold out show,

at the improv, just got to you just be kind of... Yeah, the sold out show, I was so impressed by it. And as I mentioned, we did talk about that. You hook up and listen at that night. You blow a listener's mind at that night, no?

I didn't, I'm tired of having to think about it. Isn't that funny? No, she actually did. She thought for a second, I don't go with it any night. And said, I bang, no. No, I didn't I'm trying to think about it. It's not funny. No, she actually did she she thought for a second looked up Recall the night and said I bang no, I didn't just I was no, I did not bang I didn't bang anyone. I really didn't I have because I obviously I would remember and I would have told you you looked up into the left like Recall though I've had sex I mean, but it wasn't after your show, but your listeners were cool

And it's fun because now I've connected in me of similar listeners that was there. It was so fun Yeah, I met a girl who who actually was listening to your problem and then she heard about my problem and look at that. Oh my god, the whole thing it was magical. So, uh, yeah, that was great. She gave me a few millions. Exactly. Wow. So, oh my god, my guess. Great. I don't know.

Adam, you're awesome. Thanks. You're funny. Thanks. Oh, okay. I don't want to see you. I don't know. Yeah, it really is.

It didn't really know. That was really good. There was like, there just like a line around Blast all like waiting for the toilet you've been practicing with you That was live audio from the after-the-after show I brought it. Oh, man Yeah, does the toys you get do they you really spend a lot of time and because you want to get to know your product Right, we guys really joking about using them all day, and that's why you're tired. No, I mean yes He is joking about using them all day and that's why you're tired show Brad Williams. Yeah, Brad Williams awesome you guys are podcast

here podcast called about last night get on iTunes were about last night podcast calm It's awesome. We were talking about getting so busy having to start like schedule time out to Master Bay, right? So you I'm not alone in this not at all. I mean you Time to date. That's why I knew I didn't sleep with anyone. We asked I don't time. Yeah, it's also more fun When you can plot out time. I mean obviously doing it on a whim like you's why I knew I didn't sleep with anyone when we asked, I don't know time. Yeah, it's also more fun when you can plot out time. I mean, obviously doing it on a whim, like, you know, if you're just, the wind catches you right, and you're like,

something happens that we're just like, you're oddly the super turned on, like it's fun. Right. Just like, take care of it. Yeah, pull out the power. Traffic light. For real, when did that happen? I don't know, and when have I ever, you know,

it's easier for you ladies to do that, isn't it? No, I was gonna see, I wasn't even talking about me, but yes, I have done that once, but I think guys do it all the time. I mean, I don't wanna speak for the entire day of my acting, but I feel like our movements are much more aggressive. So, like, yeah, I guess you could keep it contained

if you were really, yeah. Ampsen, have you ever mastered, have you ever mastered right here at the Love Line studio? For sure, he has. I'm not sure you're here, but I've never mastered. You did? No, yeah. You gotta have sex? Yeah, but I've never never did you did? Yeah, you got to have sex where you work. Yeah, I've never had sex here statement.

Why no because you're a nice lady. Isn't it funny that like you masturbating here would be more adventurous and dangerous than you having sex right? I feel like you had to be more shameful if I got that's what I get high five from the cleaning group. They call me bang. Yeah, but the doors locked a lot that the guard sleeps all the time knowing get in here It's pretty she used to be empty at night, but a bunch of people like we have NBC sports here now

We have 24 hour show so it's tougher now, but I used to put a black ladies pearl What a great line dude, that's awesome and then you got married. Did you ever have sex with your wife here? No, she's not that kind of girl She's like a wife I love it. I'm always time cold with you I'm always like painting you as a picture of this total tramp and then I go with the I love that I love that answer that's sweet. Okay, so you Tell me what what you just released a new album. I did yeah, it's called pop tarot suicide Pop tarot suicide my first time. It's my first time. Yeah new album. I did, yeah. It's called Pop Tarts Suicide. Pop Tarts Suicide.

It's my first time. I'm on a team. Yeah. Congratulations. Yes. What was that like? How long did you take you to do? I've been doing it together.

I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together.

I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. I've been doing it together. it is a lot yeah that's really impressive oh thanks i mean if you do always do an hour and that's thing like yeah i mean when you start headlining uh... i was middle for a while and then and then when the uh... i did that movie he and that really well so you were at the heat with standard book and the list of McCarthy that's very cool uh... what cool women to work with great first movie i mean i could have been in

you know doctor do little seventeen you could have been and i don't think i'd be a little bit of it would be in your bio it probably would be it's not like we wouldn't be talking about their city. I mean, I think you're you want to be proud of anything you do But like I think there's certain things that people just that's why when you hear certain actors that you bring up like Didn't you do this and then like oh yeah, yeah, but I don't tell right? We don't have about that exactly So that movie did well and then so headlining That's great. So that was it in the last two years. Yeah, so it's your career just taking take it off. Yeah, it's everything I'm getting calls from Spielberg everybody's just banging on my door

But it's been it's been you are Craig Ferguson Adam Crowe's podcast. You've been on love line two broke girls work a Hollacks some Chelsea jam arrest Chelsea. They I saw that dude. You're on fire. Well, thank you for saving by the sex only Oh, man. I've heard nothing but amazing things about you in your show. So this is I was honored I mean, I love that it connect because you connected with Lauren my assistant We trying to hit her out we hit on her somewhere. No, we just I mean we definitely had some like a sex energy when yeah, yeah You gonna bang her cuz she's this worked you tomorrow. Have you guys see you guys? No, no, I mean that's she should get just to make sure she's you know in a time. She's very sweet

And you can use the flesh because we gave you Did we give you give me a flashlight? Here's another reason why you're welcoming you have a parting gift to that was your welcoming Yeah, Karol gave me like some pretzels So this is definitely like a step up as far as parting gifts. He did right maybe So like he maybe like like chocolate cover pretzels like can you not did I just curse? We're not live. I thought I heard a screeching sound outside, but then I thought it was like your sensor button in there. No, no, no, we're not live.

So I can talk about trying to fuck her. You can say count if you want. Pretzels. Yeah, wow. I wish I hadn't said it. I'm sorry. Why would you drag us all the time? You took the show now, the show.

Hey, so that's my fault. I made you feel awful about that, because the look I immediately gave you was like, hey, dude, I'm not on your side. Who's the worst off? It is the tough one. I got kicked out of a comedy club for saying it no way no for say what yeah for saying the see what it uh come yeah here's what happened so I was doing this it was a buddy of mine I met he used to manage the tempi improv and he he came out to holly was trying to find features so when I was the middle act right and he he was like man you'd be great to come

down a tempi be love if I can work a deal for you to come feature for one. I was like, do I have never been on the road yet? That would be amazing. So the day we had scheduled the fall fell through because I broke my ankle playing basketball. And so then December worked out. He's like, you can come with this guy in December, but it's going to be, there's going to be a lot of big Christian like party groups. So you got to keep it like relatively clean. And at that point, I wasn't.

Christian party groups. Yeah, they drink grape juice. That seems like an oxymoron. What Christian party groups. Yeah, they drink grape juice. That seems like an oxymoron. What's that? They drink a lot of grape juice. Yeah, well actually they were actually having a great time but the head owner was such a sticker for like,

you have to, he was so concerned about people being thrown off by the content of the show. He's like, everyone has to be squeaky clean. But what you have, you've been working on your team on top of her. I was about four years in so I still wasn't like totally you know You know is I'm better now, but I mean you know you always keep trying to get better Arsenal of stuff. Yeah, okay. I'll whip out this. I'll take out the penis joke

And I've never been like super filthy, but like I had to take out curse with himself But I had this one joke where I I do this talking about those the more you know PSAs and I did one about how it's always I do like I did like Tony Dan's at doing one like you know reading's great, but you know tell you the more you know, PSAs, and I uh, did one about how it's always, I do like, I did like Tony Dan's at doing one, like, you know, reading grade, but, you know, tell you, you know, uh, uh, it's always like, it's like, it's like, it's always celebrities being like, you know, reading grade, tell your kids to buy some books for them and teach them the read and, and, and, and, and make the dreams come true. And I was like, it'd be so much better if you get some real life dudes on there talking

about issues that like normal dudes can relate to not celebrities And then I do this whole long act out of a guy being like, you know, hey, what's up? My name is Kyle surgery sucks So tell you to doctor to please put please refill on your viking in order that way you can sell the pills for ten bucks a piece All your deadbeat pill pop in front friends and finally get enough cash to get that 42-inch Visio flat screen that your slutty ex girlfriend said was gonna take up too much space in the apartment Well good things she showed you her bipolar side because now you're free from her bullshit anix. Fuck you Beth you dumb cunt. Like a whole thing like

that. I say that whole ending and it gets in a pause break and I walk off stage of my buddy whose managing goes dude you fucked me man. You said what are you saying come for dude? He's like I'm gonna have you got to go home now. But the drunk Christians were finally. Yo everybody was going crazy but he's like dude like the the manager who was above my Buddy was like dude you told me he was gonna be clean and I was clean Oh, man, and I'm doing it. I was doing it. I was like that was you say that and so he was like it was the first show of the week And he's like dude you gotta go home tonight and I was like what's for real and you really had to yeah

Yeah, and I lost a bunch of money and it was so I don't get said that word Now you said the word and now we can't even God I'm sorry that happened but since then it's all things have been yeah It's been getting a little better. It's been being proud of tempi improv a manager real cut Yeah We're gonna bring it up that Anderson really, but I mean I don't know. Too soon, man. Too soon. Dude, we're going to bring it up, Anderson, really. No, but I mean, I don't talk a lot. Well, saying it's like I was very interested to come on here because I know how much you guys talk about sex. We can.

I talk a decent, like a handful of issues in my act, but like I don't ever get to. How come? I think it's time. I feel like a sexual pun. I feel like everything is just innuendo's pun. Everything is though, but you can't even help it. It's almost. Yeah, you can't. When you said, he just released a sexual pun. I feel like everything is just innuendo. Everything is though, but you can't even help it. It's almost like, you can't.

When you said, he just released a new L mic. Immediately thought, is that really what she said? You just released. No, seriously, like, people like, how's your day? I'm like, did she just say she's masturbating? She came from, I was on the brain. I always hear people saying something sexual, but they never are.

It always, I mean, everything comes from it. Like, even when you're in your show, when you say, and everything in between, is that supposed to be kind of like, yeah, baby, well, I can do it, because I mean, everything. But they are. Even when you're in your show, when you say and everything in between, is that supposed to be kind of like? Yeah, baby. Well, I can do it because it's my show. Well, like, well, you know why, though, this show I start, I mean, really is because everything is about sex.

Yeah. It is. Like, why you wore that shirt is, you know, maybe side by, now I'll look hot and on some, I'll go late. I mean, geez. And why, by car? No, I'm just saying, every decision you make, why you eat something among me, feel healthy,

and healthy, will I feel attractive? Every breath we take, I mean, the whole point you make why you eat something am I gonna be healthy unhealthy? I'm healthy. Well, I feel attractive every breath we take I mean the whole point of being alive is to pro create and Species moving forward, so it's creepy when you think about it, but you should have banged on my after show then Anyway, okay, so But you don't talk about it. So you don't get into it that much, but how is your sex life great great? Are you are you dating are you? Dating he kicked the bipolar girlfriend Oh, no, I mean I was in I was like a glass week girlfriend I was in two I was in two back-to-back relationship for three years one was three and a half years

almost four and so I'm like emotionally spent and that's a lot of time yeah back to back there's only seven years and four and three yeah and there's only about like six months in between oh and the last one was long distance and that was a cruising Seattle where I was Where I'm from right so I was able to go home and double up Along with the whole time about two and a half years Why it's a way like but then you should be able to see other people you should but I mean I want to yeah No, so that's me. I would always but I mean towards the end obviously. Yeah, cuz it's just like yeah

Things start to change and you're right. You know that into it anyway Yeah, but at the beginning because you can't get a real gays thing about long distance relations I get it if you if you're coming to an end point where like in a year will be in the same thing There has to be sort of compromises, but you never had we did and then but it just other things got away No, it's this No, I mean yeah, sometimes no, but there's a this lifestyle being a community is like not conducive to to being But don't you always want to be in your show? not always but I mean not always not always one time there wasn't a chick

but no I mean I don't know but it's I I also am never I'm not like I don't seek it out like I don't know for you have to because they're throwing themselves at you no but I'm saying like I this like I I like to hang out with people after show in local in towns like I like to right now I get me local so I'm not just like somebody just comes up and like grabs me and says something really dirty um it's not usually the way it goes down right right no I know it's like you might know what I'm saying is I'm but you know you know there are opportunities in every city I go to uh that's maybe say what I got it sometimes you just want to talk to you and go to bed

Other town take it really excited there. Oh, yeah, oh The person Francisco, you know, I just I live there for so all my friends are there to send anybody and everybody okay, but it's gonna be a fun show Okay, it's July July 24th Through the year 26 in San Francisco. Okay, I so I was just there yesterday. Oh, man, it was awful, but I was there for a day, but I love San Francisco.

It's the cool city and that's the city that you got fired up to go to because the comedy crowd is a great. The people are a great crowd. Yeah, how fun. So you're at the punch line. Punch line, yeah. Okay, and you gotta come because I'm going to be doing I started doing this new thing with,

you know, I've got a big musical theater background. And so I started doing this thing at the comedy store late night where the keyboardist who brings people up, it's the only comedy club that has keyboard-free- Like a live organist? Yeah, totally. He brings people up and plays them off.

Nobody utilizes him for anything other than that. And so he and I started getting these spots late night, like 12, 30, 12, 45, there's like five people or 20 people. So we started improvising songs like based on, like, I do crowd work with the five people then we improvise songs based on then I'd start singing some of my bits turn to this really great thing We've done now for almost a year and I just did it for the first time in San Diego like doing an hour like 20 minutes Stand up bring this guy from San Francisco with the

LA so I'm gonna bring him up Okay, so he's gonna be a part of your thing. So it's gonna be half stand-up half I improvise songs I love that so you studied that's how you started with yeah Yeah, I think so. That was like, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I quit football to play Danies, you go in Greece. And again, let me tell you something, I was a sophomore in high school. There was a senior girl who had a huge crush on who was all over me after this play. So like again, for sure.

And in my head, I was like, all right, this play was a lot of fun. I think acting is something I might want to try. But. And in my head I was like, all right, this play was a lot of fun. I think acting is what I want to try. But I'm sure subconsciously I was like, motivated by it also. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. So that was it. You really dropped out and played Dan Zucko. Yeah. Yeah. And you sang in the whole thing. Yeah. Was the cucumber was the was the hawk. I was thinking that she was going to be like sand in it. But after she was a soccer player, she wasn't playing you. Yeah. That's great. But I didn't because I was too self, I didn't know what I was doing. I was talking to her from high school.

From Seattle. Yeah. You've never been a lusky lady up there? It's no longer there, but you ever go there? That sounds familiar. That's in San Francisco. There's a lusky lady. Oh, there's a lusky lady up there.

We put the quarters in. Yeah. Yeah. The quarters in. Creepy. You watched the women. Oh, shit. No.

And the marquee has always had really great sexual puns. Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. Every year. Happy new year. Yeah, yeah. I used to go up there every new year's for my best friend lived up there.

But yeah, it was one of those old times you go and put a quarter in and you never went. You know what the screaming and the women dance for you. The way better than the former. I missed a lot of coming up. You should do that after your show. When Pearl Jam was really big. So I feel like I wasn't really old enough to experience a lot of the.

They've built a four season on top of it and closed it down very to Promo. Yeah, I think that you should go there after your show. Just for some. Before your show for some. It would be great from material. Yeah, seriously, I've got lots of people there often anyway, and all my listeners go go see them.

You've been a lusty lady in the San Francisco. Of course. You have. You've been in the little booth and you put a quarter. Oh, yeah. And you look at the vagina. Totally. I filmed it. Yeah, so you just look at it What is it? It's girls in a in a booth in a window? There's like a strip joint. It's like a red light district in Amsterdam

Yeah, but you're right up close in person and you put quarters in and the women like do these dances take off the Clips to the act like they're robots at first like those Disneyland animatronics and then you put the quarter and then they start That would probably be more entertaining because it's not real sexy. No, they're not even. Oh, they're all like Eastern European women. Yeah, they're always kind of like hair in their armpits. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, hair armpits. Wow.

They, thanks. Thank you, Jesus. So they, um, yeah, the less they have like one way mirrors and the two way mirrors. So like if you're ballsy and you want the chicks to see you in there and then they have bad in the lesti lady up in Seattle, they had on either end with like the full body. So I go in there, it's like the second time I've ever been in there because I brought my friend, he lived in Seattle, he didn't believe that this place actually existed. He's a lawyer and he was very skeptical about everything.

I'm like, no, it's true. So we go into the booth and there's a dude and the full length one just completely beating off. We just saw like everything. No, it's dirty. Like we came in with like like like wipes and stuff like that I'll smell like chlorine and bad things okay don't go there I'll tell you where to eat all that

yeah you get to change my uh I'm sorry I can't picture it in the place well you do this is what I do I love that he has things I'm so in it's too no I am though I'm like a nice girl I really am you are but you probably got a dirty side you know no yeah probably but, but not what you think.

I don't know what I'm thinking about it. If you think, you know. I don't think you're like, you get tied up and stuff. I don't think. Oh, that I do. You do? I have, of course. I tried everything, you know.

Research, research, no really. Are you one of those try everything once, people? Yeah. I mean, I still have things on my list, of course. Wow, what's on the list after getting tied up? Don't tie it up for like, you know, have you never tried anyone up? No, I don't think.

I don't think. How about blindfold? No. Not your thing? You don't know. I don't know. Yeah, I mean, I just in the past year I got to do some stuff that I think I was gonna.

Like what? Oh man, is this the place to talk? I don't know. Dude, what else we gonna talk about? Okay, I'm gonna be funny. Yeah, but tell us. us how offended would you be if if you're having sex with a guy and he just put a blindfold on himself before? Oh, that's a great question. Oh guys, do you guys have done that? Is that doing that? That's not a good sign.

That's not a good sign. Kidding, okay, but they have a good sign. Um, what did you do in the last year, sexually? Uh, three-some. How was it? Incredible. Yeah, so how did it come together come together um it's after a show and uh oh okay now the truth yeah yeah but I mean again like the best three-story organic when you're not

connected or sleep you don't know organic what yeah oh yeah it's a lot of them coming together like hey jerry died I want to see if you're down what What city was this? San Diego. Oh hot. I mean, new date since then. You're like, I need to do San Diego a little more often, I think. Um, I mean, I've been down there since, but. Have you ever been in the audience? Yeah, back up. Back up.

Back up. They were friends. Too women. And then they like came up after the show. Yeah. And I couldn't really get, they were like, you should come out with us. And I was like, yeah, I got another show. So, you know, and I didn't think of them. I was like, well, it were like, you should come out with us and I was like, yeah, I got another show. So, and I didn't really think of them.

I was like, well, at least just swap information. And then they were texting me, I was like, okay, well, I got to do the show and then all the hips. So I wasn't trying to rush out of the show, taking my time. And then they were living in the area where we were staying. And then they said

Come we're having drinks at our apartment come over But just you and I was like oh, so that's what that was the first hint of like oh man I think so they want to rob me something exactly right my head went there my Jewish in secures That was same your Jewish yeah, okay Like if band members like they have group and afterwards they have sex with the group is and they're band members of the best have to be cool now do these girls expect to be funny during the sexual activity

now that's and that's not too crazy of a question i know i mean expected to be funny throughout i don't like do conlingus like bubble on the diner so funny where i wear a clown nose when i get yeah he was a clown nose and they left every time I mean for that's not a funny He laughs them into orgasm. That's his track Something about the clown nose that went it rubbed on the the clitorates rubber the rubber yeah

Yeah, I run it and joke books. It's probably not actually helping okay, so the bite you over I'm dying You know, were you attracted to where they both hot? I think I think everyone's like hot as a good body Maybe not that bright but like they're both attractive, but I mean I was attracted to where they both hot. I think I said to everyone's like hot as a good body. Maybe not that bright, but like, they're both attractive, but I mean, I was attracted to, to, did not that bright, I shouldn't say that. I just, I just, I just, I just, I got, go. I'm so in your head, I'm, come on.

I mean, I was more attracted to one of them. Yeah, I'll be right. Yeah. But the other one really, I'm always been like a brunette. I'm not, right. Yeah. You overcompet Satan spend more time with the other one

because you're, no, I try, I think I did a good job. So, when you're first time, so they, they don't do the how did it start? Oh You go to the house. Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm like I need to know okay ding dong That's just why I said when I took my pants off and then I right no and then I go in there and and Just walk me up to like the room and and we're drinking and just and I mean it seemed like I Started kind of get the feeling I was like I think I know what's gonna happen at some point But there's no rush here because I feel like it's like let's just hang out and get to know it So you said that or you thought that what's what's thinking right?

Could you really hate you so down? I'm like yeah, you know what I anticipate like I don't think that's I think we all know it's gonna go down about 20 I got two more sets. Yeah, no, so it was a So it was just like really fun to hang out and shoot the shit and drink and and almost forgot like what was in the cards for for the for the future, but so that even made it more fun I think for everybody because it was just like we all got along right exactly But they were friends and then they were cool. And then you apparently, yeah, they seem very cool. Right. With some of the things they're doing. I like to think they knew each other before. I see. So they were like getting on and then they each, like, so they would like, there was a lot of, um,

yeah, mixing and matching. Mixing and matching. Okay. It did you have to have sex with the one that you were last track to? Did you have sex with both of them? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. yeah yeah use a condom yeah always you changed it you have to yeah of course you would not say tell us we didn't but i'm being hammered and i never know i was you have to switch con if you're not myself to get like i mean we were all right drinking but i mean i just but you nervous because

your first of the how i handle boobs and vagina and boobs at the same time and i guess the uh time? And love that. I guess the, the, what's the word I'm looking for? How much? That's dirty. No, the time that you're going to distribute between each, like that was something I definitely would want. Like in your head, you've to like eight minutes.

And you're like, and you want to be attentive. Like it's, you know, I think I'm pretty attentive. Yeah. That's why I asked you over compensating, spend more time with one you were less attracted to because you were actually laid down after a little bit and like just was like, I'm gonna just kind of chill for a minute

and take almost like a little power nap. And so that made it easy. But then after, everybody was on the same team. Right, exactly. Yeah, that makes sense. So that's fun. So would you do it again? Oh yeah.

Yeah, but yes, yeah, it's a good time. I think, yeah. But the best three sums are the ones that are Okay, I don't want to say the best. There's amazing three sums all over the world. I'm not gonna do it. I think anytime It absolutely is probably the best right? No, no, just been so bad three sums with free I've had a boarded three sums like oh my god stop left. I've had like I've had that many. I'm actually I should I could have had my head Was it the music did they have like some sort of weird line king soundtrack exactly line king and I lost my bone no um what I was is that no I was in Mexico with a girlfriend and a guy and then we were all like it bad

sorry do it and I was I'm so not attracted to him and my friend and I are see the thing about chicks hucking up like when I have been with chicks you have to be really attracted to them yeah yeah no but it's better if you don't know anyone like I didn't mess girl I didn't but if it's if it's no one know their favorite color. No, I don't know anything and so when it's organic You don't like I see who cares. It's fun. It's like can be so freefell But then if you're in a relationship and then you have never done this I've never been in a relationship and then brought a third in or been the lot of people do that, huh? Yeah, and so typically, but when it's like no one's like jealous or connect has the certain connection

Someone it just comes together again. I'm saying that there's just fun because you can just kind of have fun. But feelings. No feelings. We have to call on the one. No attachment. Yeah, probably over a year ago. And this guy called up and his girlfriend wanted to have a threesome, so she brought her

friend in. And then as soon as her boyfriend started having sex with her friend, like she just became enraged, punched her boyfriend right in the nose while he was banging her broke his nose what that is crazy right she's literally her idea him out of her he was probably because she probably saw looking his eye where he was like he took it up a knot when it became real she freaked out yeah couples should only have three sums if first of all you should never think like save your relationship like because of the old babies having a baby baby worse because you can't like Go on a vacation going vacation right but people do they're like oh, that's bring a third person and then it could be like a disaster

So before couples I always say you have to you know talk about it beforehand. There's like rules How much talking can you really do though that to prepare you? Oh a lot? No, I yeah, I mean I've talked about this a lot Like I would be like kissing. There's no she can't sleep over you can't actually I do I would be like hey no oral sex to the yeah everything there's rules and you have to be like how would this make you feel clearly this woman hadn't thought it through too much you know the you also want to see I think every person wants to feel like they'd be cool with it so that yeah they're probably gonna brush off more than they and just like they're gonna be like of quay if you're yeah if you're like doing it from behind and you want to like touch like one of the boob's

with right like your hand of course that's not about me but that could be the thing that sets her off because she's like you only touched these tips like exactly you don't know right it could go very very wrong that's why I'm saying if you do are in a couple not saying that it can't I mean I was just with um do you know relationships that has saved I well I know a lot of yeah I know a lot of couples who have not not saved but I know couples who opened up the relationships And so they they have when I said the swing around the show They took the swing around the window. Oh, that was an awesome show

Daniel Stern last week spin land. He wrote a show called not the guy voice of Kevin Arnold Not the guy from over now the other actually his Twitter is the other Daniel Stern Yeah, I know that would have been interesting, right? Because he would have been. But he is a singer. And so he talks about how, and I know a lot of singers too, just from my line of work. I mean, if I had a minstrel, I say to them, you know, they talk about it, and they, a lot of people, you have the gene 40, you know, a lot of people don't want to be monogamous.

They have a hard time being with one person a few years, go by, maybe they're in the relationship, and they think, well, how buy them, maybe they're in the relationship, and they think, well, how would we, we've already, you've already kind of getting a little bored with it, and maybe you're both interested, and she wants to be with women or whatever, and you talk about it,

and then you decide, make rules, you open it up, and they keep doing it. I think the couples are, it works for a lot of couples, but a lot of couples, it's like a disaster, someone runs off of the best friend. Because I also feel like, even as cool as you are with it Like seeing like that happen to like your significant other. There's gonna it like there's always room for that moment to get brought back up

It's sort of petty argument. Oh exactly right or you went down on her you look like you were more into your organs I'm stronger with her than it ever because she changed a channel too fast before the highlight was finished on the Center you like oh change a little fast. It's kind of the way you change it up after I was walking you instead of Brett, you know, like so many comparisons. Brett's wife was way tighter than you. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, it can get ugly, so tread with, I don't think I could swing. No, see, no, right.

And I don't consider myself a super jealous person, and I think that's probably what jealous people say, but I definitely like know that I can be, but like a healthy amount, you know, because I think if you not in all. You were with these women, did you ever think that you wanted to be with someone else or you were content with your sex life and everything was perfect? No, I mean, yeah, towards the end for sure, because like also the distance just doesn't help anything. It does, it does make you you want to once you get together, just fuck like rabbits. But then I think when I started to notice things were not, we would see each other.

And for four days, instead of doing it a couple times a day, it'd be like maybe once the weekend. That's when you have to wait. That's when you're late. Put a fork in it. Yeah, I get it. Which is a bummer. It is a bummer because it shouldn't I mean Hopefully my 80s I'm still feeling like

Exactly people and people do and so don't they oh yeah First you're close to think about no people are having sex so woman called into love on the other night It's gross. It is like not be No, it's disgusting. Yeah, okay We're like we need to be around the bush, but's disgusting. Yeah, be around the bush. But this 20. You know they have just trying to fit it. Oh my god.

Okay, we're going to get back to the bush story a minute. But first I have to give a shout out to our sponsors. Please. Everyone, thanks for listening to the show. I so appreciate it and I help you supporting the sponsors to allow me to bring you two shows a week. Okay, so check them out. You know, I only pick people that I know are going to help your life.

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Speaking of the flashlight, okay. Number one, sex toy for Ben. And how excited are you to try it? Are you gonna ever pour back to me? Adam, please. I mean like, like privately probably probably. Do you want me to tweet about it? Like I just I wanted to do like a live like Google hang out or something. I thought we could just like yeah about it Sure Adam right Adam is gonna try it and it's gonna be awesome So with the flashlight is the number one sex toy for man. I mean a little apprehensive to it because I you know

Well, just because like I've built up quite a rapport with my hand over the last, you know This is the thing so so many men I feel like it's cheating a little bit. No, but it's not my hands like hit game winning shots for me in high school It's like been the it's you know, it's stopped and you're gonna take it home with you though It stopped Brad when we got into a fight Brad Williams, you know, cuz he's charging at my knees I just put my hand down on his head and stopped him so it's like this like has he ever been used as a sex toy like on a really large woman I think that he could actually be used as a section he could put a library like a bullet in his mouth They put it yeah, they put him they put him in one of those cannons like one of the teacher cannons and shoot him inside a woman's

Yeah, I think like Oprah he could probably fit in there Jesus. Oh my god Fire Anderson Jesus is Oprah. She's out there and heard that you know it would be great What if that what if that was the thing that got over to Colin and go? What if that was the moment? Well, you are going to like it even though you love your hand because I think, well, like I said, I mean, it's similarly to feeling of real sex. We've got a million toys tried from and guys, you just got your hand and you're like, I'm happy because that's all you know, but what if you started pride is a bit you started adding Loub you started adding something that feels like a vagina it feels like your actually I was like yes you thought

you put in the container and your penis goes inside and you come inside of it inside of it and then you just rinse it out in the sink it can you ever get pregnant like you know that's the thing you don't have to worry about getting out that I've ever heard of you don't have to worry about getting pregnant but you can have sex with one that looks like a porn star so like Laura was telling me this so they have shaped vaginas. They get their vaginas the same way like you know Danny Glover put his hands in the sand on Hollywood Boulevard these porn stars put their Jhinos and their vagina they take molds of their vagina you could have sex with Jenna Janice him Neat or whoever that

Love Jenna Janice you terror Patrick. Do point is? Yeah, I know a couple of them. Do you want a sex with her? Do you want the tear pack? Cameron, what she looks like, but I'm assuming she's attractive. No, she's a point star. Yeah, pop, pop, pop. But see, the point star, when you matter, you could honestly be like, hey, like this is Martha Stewart.

And well, okay, that's a bad example. That is because you're probably definitely not out of post-apoparins. You're gonna look like a pulporeal inside that one. Holidays, you'd stick it into a pumpkin pie. Yes, exactly. So, but yeah, I guess some guys some guys really prefer because i guess they can really imagine that like it feels like oh you know what exactly a lot of

i mean they're they're best i'll watch the videos of you know what you exactly like oh i'm really having sex with our system guys are into that some guys are just into the feeling because it's within your hands so that's crazy that we've got a point about and they do the loop is also created for the uh... the point starts as well. Right? Like this is what she feels like. Yeah. Wow. The whole thing. Yeah. But the one I gave you was the flight. So it's light weight.

You got the flashlight. You got the lights on. I got the. All right. I might have to trade this in for a vagina. I feel like this is like when I was a kid, I'm trading my curvy bucket. You know, I'm trading my curvy bucket from my account. Flashlights. Yeah. You're trading a butt for a vagina. every pocket you know like changing my curry pocket for my car flashlights you're grateful I gave you more than

pretzels and now you want to I'm incredible grateful I want the traffic flashlight I'm getting a new you got the flight which is lightweight looks cool no one can tell doesn't look like a sex toy but you have whatever it doesn't look like it's

instead of your hand check it out go to sex as m e dot com slash flashlight that sex with m e dot com slash flashlight check it out because Adam's gonna check it out, go to sexesme.com slash flashlight. That's sex with Emily.com slash flashlight. Check it out, because Adam's gonna check it out. And Colin, you could be not a mess to change your words. We could just talk. We could just, yeah.

I won't even share. In fact, I don't even, I'm like a good friend. Like you could tell me. Yeah, you seem like a very good listener. And I would change, really. Yeah. Awesome. Man, so anyway, I wouldn't tell you one or so.

Okay. With the flashlight or the threesome, although I'm not really talking about that. Have you told, did she listen to your stuff? Oh, yeah, she's a big fan. She's so proud of you. You're really gentle, so. Yep. And she's like, she listen when I was on love line and she she texted me after and goes, the camera's on you and you fidgeted with your hat. You got to stop fidgeting with your hat. She like scratched your nose and like they can see you and like you are shifting in your chair. Like get comfortable. Why are you shifting so much? I'm like, Mom, and then you're like, and that one person called and I'm like, why didn't you tell them about when you guys split up? And they thought you could really could have helped that person. I mean,

she, you know, when we were on the red carpet, I took it on the red carpet for the heat, the premieres in New York. And I was walking, getting ready to walk down on them and I was like, Oh man, she should for sure be out of here. So I had my agent go grab her from inside and so she was staying on the red carpet. And just so proud. And like, you know, people don't really know who I am. So they're taking a few pictures, kind of be like, who the fuck is this guy?

Like who is with this, that is girlfriend? Like is this some, you know, whatever. And then Santa, Bullock and Melissa come up behind me. So cameras go crazy. And then we're standing by, after we walked down and took some pictures, kind of just lingering, just soaking up the experience. And then we're standing by, after we walked down and took some pictures, kind of just lingering, just soaking up the experience. And they're all talking to, you know,

E and entertainment tonight. My mom's like, go up and stand behind Sandra. And I'm like, what? I'm like, mom, fucking, I brought you out here. Can you just like chill? She's like, it's cool, don't stand behind Sandra. I go and do what? She's like, you stand behind you.

They're gonna be like, who's that guy? Is he in the movie? Maybe we should go top to him. And then they go, excuse me, are you in the movie? And you go, yes, actually, I played the bad guy. I go, that actually is not a terrible idea. But mom, I didn't bring you out here to be my manager and say, what do I know?

You just came out of me. I'm like, that is nothing to do with what we're talking about. Just go stand there and stand there full, like, like, just like, go, just photo bomb. And they'll be like, who's this asshole? Oh, wait, it's a... The bad guy in the movie and in real life. Yeah, I love it You do the same mom accent that I do it. It's like the Jewish mother. Yeah, and then she tells me by the way

Then she'll I'll repeat some of this stuff to her like a weird conversation She's like did you watch like you know what you can go get those these these bars these two of these cliff bars You put them in your car if you having trouble eating fine time you put them in your car And then you can eat them whenever you want because they're in your car So like whenever you're driving they're being your car, if you're having trouble eating, fine time, you put them in your car, and then you can eat them whenever you want, because they're in your car, so like whenever you're driving, they're being in your car, you get hungry, you take one of my eat them, because they're in your car and they're accessible

right there for you. I go, hey mom, when I put these in my car, she go, fuck you. And I go, could you tell me to put the bars in my car one more time? I was like, do you work for the Cliff Bar Company? And she's like, I'm just trying to help, because I know you're a busy person.

And then I tell her this, and she starts laughing, and she goes, I'm giving you so much material. I don't know why you're not using me. And I'm really not. No, I never, like right now this is like, I first time in a while that I've repeated. It's good, it's good Jewish mother's self is good. No, I don't know.

It's just any mother, I get it. No, I have that with my mother. You can be talking about blow jobs really, like when you're 60 that's what you're gonna do. Talk about blow jobs really. I mean, do you think you should try to think of something else? She still says that.

I was better than that though. What? Adam's better than that the Jewish like the Jewish mother but you can do their parents like on stage like that's their thing no but that's how I do my mom though I do the Jewish because she used to wish like she remember you work no she's like a little girl so she's got like that yeah she gave me columns though when I first she was the one Jewish lady from

Oklahoma yeah there's actually there's like six she uh... she might yeah cuz my folks put when I was nine so she was ba I was big you know just with her my sis and She gave me columns when I was 16 which was so weird and First of all I was like hey awesome actually. I want to part of it your mom She's all her friends lover. I mean she's the life of like I just met a few of them in New York I was doing shows she goes back with her sorority From Tulane they go every year to New Orleans to help habitat. There's like a program where they help build houses

for some of the victims who are still struggling. And so I met a few of them in New York that came to my show, like your mom is the best. Like we see where you get all, like she's just, and I got to a point to where like, I stopped looking at my mom as a parent and a person,

and that's when we actually like, I was like, she's funny, like cause for so long I'm just like it's my mom stop embarrassing me and all that bullshit, but she gave me these condoms Which I was like I'm glad that you even think that I'm doing this right now Uh, and then she was just like just don't get pregnant don't get like whatever. She's like I'm mom It's just so we don't even want these and check you gotta use them. Don't not use them. Yeah, yeah keep them in the car next to your clip

I'm and uh, but uh, I mean I'm she at least threw him at me. It's definitely good. She gave me enough of a quick talk That was just like because she saw it was uncomfortable and walking out She's like put him on a bad shit's gonna happen And I was just like almost like when your dare officers like you smoke pot You're gonna fucking kill your friend with a with a gun made of Doritos or you know some shit It puts the fear in your head to not what did you call her up and tell her what a good job you did it with a threesome and how you're taking them all. I want to send her the show. Have you had her on your podcast with Brad? We're going to. I'm going up to Seattle when he's up

there to do shows and I made a point to say we get because she'll show that's awesome when you're doing a show in Seattle. Well Brad's new shows I'm just gonna go visit my nieces and because they're they're turning into little hell. Just talking about just they're the cool they're you know the coolest people ever they're almost five They're the best but yeah, but my sister just had another kid so now they're fighting for attention right that's crazy Yeah, no, that's really and they're the sweetest little girls and she tells me these stories I'm like I don't want to hear this because they're anyway. This is not sexual. Let's change the let's go back to the next sexual thing Okay, so right now real quick real quick sexual with my nieces all I can know all I can think they're five

But even in the back of my head. They'll tell me like Matthew gave me a cookie today, and I'm like who the fuck is math Like I'm already so right like preparing mentally for like they're probably what four or five years away from guys starting to try to like You know like, you know, a whole hands and zero porn is so out there. These 10 year old boys are probably googling boobies day in and day. They are my nine year old god son was googling like, um, ladies with boobies or ladies with boobies. Like, I mean, who I was a guy. He was eight on my dad's and my dad on my dad.

I'm like, He's with boobies. That's that's by the way, that's exactly what you would Google when you're eight years. Yeah. What you do. No, you're not going to tell me that's by the way that's exactly what you would Google when you're eight years ago. Yeah, you know, you're not gonna tell me black, you know, whatever like jack like he's like eight like this kid is like I love this Yeah, it's awesome right ladies with boobies. By the way, that should be the name of his improv group or or or or Atlanta's more set cover band, whichever I love it. So sure, so you think about okay, so speaking of sex you think about them having sex No, I don't think about it. You want to be I'm just saying I'm already like I'm not even my kids

And I think about stopping these pre-pubescent Pre-pubescent boys are boners with feet all the dudes walk around and they hump and fuck anything that's in their path Why don't we know that though see we don't know that until we're older like I don't know that guys are Are thinking that and even in college when you think oh, you don't know that the are are thinking that in the evening college when you think i would like you don't know that i was a jackal all the same as a piece or two watch for you guys to know like you know i didn't know i didn't know i didn't know guys were all hornia boners were hiding it until later when they're like i was so bearers i don't i mean i couldn't hide yours it was so

big no hilarious um no i'm just saying like i think there's no it's when you're young kid hiding the bone like that seems like you you always like pulling this whatever you're doing you're standing out even more so also you're in the worst place to get it like you can't control that you're playing kickball you hit the game when you home run and you just heart is a rock and everyone's like shit man to that turn you on like kind of I guess do they notice so boys notice other because I I never knew to look at a guy's pants depends on what area grew up you grew up in too. I grew up in Michigan.

You grew up with like the skinny jeans, it's tougher. Yeah. I grew up with loose and clothes. Yeah, so you couldn't see any boners. No, exactly. So boners, so lately. Yeah, so, so, all right. So enough about my nieces. And nobody nieces not hot, no. There have been a couple cases where five girls have been pregnant.

That's true. Oh, dude. No, it's not. No, it's not. I don't need to look it up. It's fun fact. Don't look it up. Don't even talk about it. Don't even say that again. That's not true. I can't have the tell that possible makes me so terrified I'm about to beat up a five-year-old now. Okay That means give me the guy to get cookies. Give me the cookie. Eat his cookies after you beat him up

That's like the mortal combat finish him. Okay, so Adam what's your biggest turn on sexually? Oh, man finish him. Okay, so Adam what's your biggest turn on sexually? Oh man. I'm a sucker for a good kisser. Yeah. Yeah. That's big. It's super hot. It's one of the first things it goes in a little time. It's not a deal breaker, but it's I can tell things are going to be way better if that's. But do you ever feel like the first kiss? Do you just, if it's a bad you're out or do you think it can get me over time? I mean, I don't necessarily take me out of the rest of the evening, but it definitely is like in the back of my mind. I'll probably spend less time doing that. Right, exactly.

Yeah, it's kissing. No, it's hot. But kissing, it's true. That's how we all connect. It's kissing. That's the first thing we do. But then eventually, kissing is like the first thing that goes in a long time. I know.

It's just you stop kissing. And I'm still excited. When I see like on the kiss cam at sporting events, first thing we do, but then eventually kissing is like the first thing that goes in a long time. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do.

I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do.

I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. I always do. that you want to be having that that guy's being his wife. So maybe it goes in waves. Maybe it's like, you know, five to 10 years of like some great stuff and then there's a chunk where you're like, all right, the kissing's gonna like take a pause for a minute. Yeah, or maybe,

and then you get towards your end of the week. That's what I'm hoping for. You got it, there's a way to keep it all the time. This is my purpose. Yeah. People say their loss aren't, it's lost or aren't trying or, you know, they can effort because people don't they don't just like

You know people don't talk about sex. We're not taught to how to talk about it. It's called me bad days Call me bad talks about it all the time. Yeah, yeah Turn on teeth a great laugh. Yeah, sucker for a good laugh good laugh. That's good And if they can make me laugh, but not too much. Don't be I don't want to be fun. Yeah, right? Yeah, you wouldn't see with another comedian No, never have no is it because you're in the same business too close Yeah, I'm not even attractive. Yeah, no there's definitely attractive. Yeah, but I um I don't I Also don't like I'm not a kiss and teller. So I don't like my business being out there

Even though I share the threesome story, which was very that was a big deal for me You were really good. It was um actually funny and entertaining and informative all those things Yeah, yeah, what what what the show about? I got deep into you know specifics, but um, no I mean because we got sidetracked. I would have gotten deep into the specifics, but I didn't do that to you Exactly. I don't hate always fun myself, John Tew, are Brunettes who are smart and sexy and funny. And I know that sounds like obvious, but like that what you would like one, but I'm not like an on-person all the time where I'm always joking. Right, of course. But I like to a lot.

But if you can take yourself two-series, like, you know, one of my exes, like I would just try to find the light, it's part being in community and you find the light. The levity, you're like trying to like make it work. Yeah, situations that are like tragic or dark and like, you know, we were in New York and something happened with like a door that got broken. And I started making all these jokes and she was like flipping out about it because, oh, she broke the door

because I was working on editing something that I was trying to get for this audition. And she was like, she had made dinner and she was telling me how I was ready and told me a bunch of times. I was like, baby, I just really, like any of you more minutes, like I'm sorry, like this is just, I have to get this in tonight because like they're deciding tomorrow, whatever it was.

And she got really busy in the first time, like, and not show no signs of violent tendencies. Like, kick the door so they're broke. And then I was like, well, that's great because you know I'm best friends with a guy who makes doors. So that's gonna be easy to fix. Like she like that.

Right. And which is, you know, hey fellas. Right. Don't make passive sarcastic comments like that. Because's in the moment she was on a receipt but i didn't know how to handle it other than you know but um anyway be uh be be not um what else is uh eternal other than like that those physical average like when do you ever go out and do you forget like how do you meet with high maintenance people i'm not a big you know don't be materialistic but i

like a lady like like my first girlfriend, like from then, high school for a little bit of college, was a little more like, she was, you know, a jock, but also, and had some like lady-like things, but just not as much. And then the one after that was definitely more of a balance of like, was a lady, but we could, you know, go work out together and stuff.

Right, got it. Does that make sense? Yeah, totally, but what's the part about high maintenance? What's high maintenance to you? For example, just being, I don't know, being, I'm always calling you one, the morning something, like usually, just like,

there's needs of theirs that you're not meeting. If we can, like, if it's a Sunday, we like, you know, barbecue something, we're sitting down, we have some wine and a TV show. There's, there's always high maintenance, all I think to me on a certain level is like they always find something that they're not Satisfied with or there's something they're wrong like there's always like like You know sit down. You're like, you know got wine some show you're gonna watch a movie and like oh this wine's not very

Oh, the meat I could have should have cooked it like all stuff like that, you know I get it right My mom is I'm very old that the meat I could have should have cooked it like all stuff like that you know that's always negative right like that in some ways my mom is A people pleaser. She's always I mean she's a host right I'm just wondering because sometimes the things that turn our boss could be like things that we see in our parents Yeah, I mean my mom is overly bit like overly supportive feed you too much overly like you know Are you wearing a jacket as you walk out of the house with nine jackets that she gave you before you. Exactly. The beach loves you. Yeah. But I mean, turn off. Just bitchy peep. I mean, people that talk shit. I'm like,

not, you know, we all do our fair share in, in, you know, the ways we do it. But, uh, to just straight up talking bad about people are like, what it's just I'm not a fan. And that's like an immediate. I think in general general people talk about other people. It's just like, you got so much to continue with yourself about your life. Like what do you, like what do you, you know, it's true people become like obsessed with other people. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. And it makes it better. I'm going to take, I'm going to stop being crazy on myself. I'm going to talk about someone else. That's going to make me feel a little bit better for a moment. Yeah.

It's like, it's not worth it. Also a big turn on is anything that I'm not doing. Like something not in the business is very attractive because I love to learn about stuff that's, you know, like my last girlfriend was clinical psychology grad school, which was way cool. But it, you know, I think in the end it started her a little bit because the over analysis of like certain situations. Oh, she was like, what does that mean? Oh, did you mean? I'm like, well, I meant, I meant, let let's actually like I got to take a shower because we got a we're going to go meet up with with Dave. Oh, but you got to take a shot is that because you don't want to sit here with me and talk about what Why you didn't come home after the show?

Well, I went home because I went home because I told you I'd wake up really to be with my niece because I had a babysitter Is it so there you need to serve? really to be with my niece because I have a babysitter. Is it so there, your nieces are okay? Do you love times guys are not as complicated as women make them, I make them out to be, they tend to. Oh guys are simple. Simple, simple. Simple to follow.

Or just, I mean, no. No, no. Yeah, I mean you said it yourself, I'll, like especially when we're younger, all we want to do is bang. Yeah, and it doesn't get that different. Anyone like eat and bang and they don't have it. Like, aren't it five, giving little girls cookies?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Totally. Like I never had a problem acknowledging if I did something like that was like they made her upset or whatever and just like apologize. Let's address it, talk about it for a good chunk and then move on. Okay. I was like why would you want to bask in anything negative or fucked up that you one of us did.

Like let's acknowledge it for sure, but it was never enough time. You know, it's like, I was like why do you want to sit and talk about something shitty for like what do we, what do we talk about something shitty for like what do we talk about you know Balloon it because she had the advantage there Yeah, for sure I was playing the kibas in the conversation right that be like you trying to make everything funny You know I mean you know you got a Emily made everything sexual first you don't I don't we're not talking very Sexual question that you listeners are probably like do this guy's's talking about his family. I know I just you know

We're gonna need an email. So I heard her having sex with my step-down. Oh you did sure. Yeah, and I gotta be honest Stoked Afterwards way after the fact hearing in the moment the one of most dramatic things I've ever heard I'm not even gonna like read what happened like I can hear it right now as I'm talking to you. That's how fucking come on How old were you oh this was um Says six seven years ago So they were so they were respectively what 62 and 50 okay Sexy

76 year old who banged the 21 year old who was seeking with the No, the 76 year old who banged the 21 year old who was sleeping with the Grandfather No, we're starting to talk about I remember beat around the bush. Yeah, beat on the bush You don't the bush. We never came back to it anyway mom. So I hope they're doing it right now, but uh because Why you know, it's it's great. So they should be doing it Right, did you see they know you were home like no, I was never watching a movie. We're at my grandparents place and they Well, we did my grandma just passed they a little more than like four months and we were uh... the uh...

we're helping them we were cleaning all the house out my mom was a rickian emotional rickian to get fucked anyway let's change topic but not your mom now your mom's insects and grandfather's insects uh... ok so what she uh... most random crazy sex experience or have oh man uh... Okay, so what's your most random crazy sex experience you're at? Oh man, I actually did it in a banana public room changing room. You did?

Yeah. Do you know the size? Was it really hot? Yeah. Because there were people coming and going all around. And did they know where the salesperson was like not that? No way. And then not very quiet.

And then that's when they got out. She's getting out. No, no, no. They didn't. No, no clue did the clothes you're trying to survive oh yeah did you come back to the right when you jacquered over all

no no we'll yeah no those clothes were like in the court they were far from the other side they didn't even really have anything with them they're having socks and bringing alcohol to the house and it also was like not planned at all like she was like we um... we were she definitely was became more sexual with me. No, she's been able to, you think you brought, you brought it out in her. So you were ahead of women, bring out stuff in you. Uh, yeah. Are you more that, are you more that, no, I mean, I like, I'm, I'm definitely open to, uh, you know, new, free sums and, but also, um, but I don't like too much, like if somebody

trying to like tell me how to do stuff right like let's let her just yeah like so it's like say i got it like i've done like no totally definitely definitely want to help out make this the best for both of us but but have you had women that are like that like this obviously that would be annoying oh it's not appealing what do they like for example if you're not like to laugh left because i was joking that's a people think they're with me the right like doing the hoki pokie down there just all sorts of

that's annoying and i think i always think that guys would think that i would be like that Because I was joking. That's what people think they're with me. They're right. Like doing the hokey polka down there. Just all sorts of... That's annoying. And I always think that guys would think that I would be like that, that I would be like with the bull horn, like pulling out my book or like I know all these, but I'm so not like that. But I'm so not. But you know what you want. But it's what I do.

I'm not. But I guess it does make sense to do it. But I'm not, I'm not like what you think. I don't have like a sex swing like. Unless I do. And the garage. And the more I was gonna say, you're not in your room. I do your room you've got all know everything you're saying you don't have you have um not in my room for sure but I feel like why wouldn't you want to tell the

person especially if they're way off the guys doing what you do it yeah do like performing all sex at a moment it can be it can be is it one of your favorite sexual act your favorite sexual position thing to do sexually. Oh, man, I'm being so soft with you here. Are you really? Yeah, kind of no. Yeah, give me some of the more hardcore stuff. Well, favorite sexual, but I mean, there, I mean, and laying down on the side is pretty great. Yeah, like the spooning thing up against the wall. If you can pull it off is always hot right? Yeah, what's your fan like what's something that you want to try that you haven't done what's on your sexual bucket list?

Um, I did it on a hot tub once and that was um, it was fun. Yeah, it wasn't like I don't I wouldn't be jumping it doing I don't know what would be cool. I think all the way on the wall all the way you need like a snorkel thing But I think like there would probably be no real pleasure involved. That's just almost like a bucket The farmers that you think it is, but then it's like I would be not be at all. Yeah, no underwater You'd like to hide down you didn't breathe unless you had like a snorkel. Yeah, the showers always cool Shower sex is awesome. Yeah, it's not done enough. I don't think we're talked about enough You talk about it. Well, there's actually a page of my book that chapter but a page about a shower sex Yeah, yeah, because you got a chair there by the way, you you know chair or just for the sake of saying over embrace her cells

If you want to have sex over behind she can lean over and grab her hand on her ankle I literally and then you come in from behind. Yeah, you know or yeah, or if you don't have it You know the chair even get a bean bag in there You want to those waterproof bean bags right and you can like bring all these toys I always talk about they probably have a lot of There's all these toys that are, have you ever used a toy with a person? No, I haven't.

This fleshlash, you are opening my eyes to all of you. But if you were at a woman who brought out a vibrator with you. No, oh, wait, yes. No, I had a girl, we were in the tub, and she sat under the faucet, and I was like, what the fuck are you doing? She was like, do you need to clean yourself?

She's like, and then she started screaming, and I was like, what the fuck is going on? Yeah, with a lot of women, you first sped up. By the way, with five. So this was like, really surprised. That was really great. Did you, was it hot? Was it hot, right?

To what? To watch a woman. I always tell good, or no. I got jealous of the faucet, no. Of course it was hot. No, but some guys are like, oh, I think most guys, I think women getting barrister ashamed and they don't want to touch themselves or a guy.

But first of all, I feel sexy, I know. But I also know that guys think it's hot. And so it's like,'t think everything's hot. Gotta be careful, ladies. Gotta be careful. We had a call her years ago. She slipped a disc and she got stuck in that position. In a hot tub?

Yeah, well, no, in her bathtub and she was pleasureing herself, like, I'll throw legs up on the wall and she slipped to tears. Oh, you do have to be careful. I've heard stories like this before that people said. I think it was her dad who had to come in and help her. The tub is, I mean, it's not shaped or set up for you to do a lot of acrobatics no but it's the water pressure that women a lot of women use the pressure and is actually a toy

well one of the last times i've never have once the water yeah because there's better but there's better like yeah but i was saying there's like water proof toys you can use that and disgusting uh... are you give me some hardcore stuff

uh... i don't really okay so i mean i don't you could use that was a matter of and disgusting. Uh, are you giving me some hardcore stuff? Um, I'm okay. I don't really, okay. So I mean, I don't hardcore. I mean, I don't, I apply you really, I thought you were saying I'm really being a peegean guest and I feel bad. No, because you kept saying I'm talking about my mother, but I, this is just like a different, I don't know, but it's a challenge. Okay.

Okay. So, but is there anything that you're like, oh, I want to try or do that? Yeah. Um, I like, oh, I want to try or? Do that, yeah. Yeah. I mean, like at a drive-in maybe, oh, do they still have those around? For sure they do. Here in LA, I don't know, see, I don't do anything. I think another public place would be.

In a public place, a lot of the stuff. Yeah, like the woods, like I can't, like. Yeah, woods is really hot. That's insane. Yeah. But I'm not into like, camping. Like I've been in situations where the windows open and and you can see across the way and the girls I can leave it up and I can it's how I'm like fuck that. It's not that guy I can see I can see him right now. He's waving at us

Like he's you don't want me watching you but there's something up inside being caught like the banana public thing Yeah, cuz you like could get caught you like even if they knocked on the door, the salesman was going to be like, what the fuck's going on in there? Right. It's like banana. Probably like, they're not better not jizz on that polo. Whatever you say. That's probably what he was thinking. So what's like, have you ever been with a woman like, we talked about your turn on it? What is anything ever happened?

We were like, I said to turn off. Besides like yelling like was over like a specific time or like, I'm just not into this or something bad happened. It's actually. Oh man. Come on. Oh man. Um, yeah, a, um, uh, a, a, a not well groomed, um, but right, happens underground.

See, that's a thing. So do you feel like if it's she should have no hair or just wasn't. I'm a fan of, uh, that's a thing. So do you feel like if she should have no hair or just was I'm a fan of of nothing. Nothing. That's pretty much what you see these days, right? I think that's I think that's a great call by everyone involved. Right. I mean, too. So do you have nothing? Do you trim and shave and even keep it kept, but not not all of it. So a woman has a little bit when she's a little bit. Are you like, no, no,, it's fine But if it's like so you're saying she was like over like I really find it You like because I also had kind of a beard at the time a little bit So I literally was I couldn't tell it first for you began or

It was dark. It was I did almost like like a swimmers move like where I kind of went down and came right back up Right cuz you like Oh my god, that's crazy. Yeah, yeah was, it was daunting, especially in this day and age. Yeah, cause you think like what you got, get them out, get, get a no no. I feel like there was like, it's a room. It should just try to be different. Some women just, no, you know what, some guys are into hair. To get cold down there.

What's the deal? Yeah, I don't know. And the active, also it's a question. It's easier to get it all off. Where's the no no pro when you need it? No no pro. Emily, what is it? No, that's what it is, the no no pro. No no, but people should freaking, women, you need to get it all off. Where's the No No Pro when you need it? No No Pro Emily, what is it? No, that's what it is, the No No Pro.

No No, but people should freaking, women, you need to put in your shape. No No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, well, do you never went out with her? Did you or do you because somebody shaved like I heard us for once a guy who's with a woman She was like way too he thought for her's taste. She was to yeah, they went He just met her though like in the lives of motel in New York and he brought up stairs and he like He's like, you know what? And he like puts her on the on the counter and you like called call up for some like shaving cream And he like shaved her right there on thing and then he like made it until like a hot sexy thing Oh, this is person Friendly guy met her pretty guy I met a party with.

How is the front desk for a shaving green? This guy, this guy met a party. He was hot. He was telling me, so everyone tells me they're freaking, I can't tell you. Can't wait to say it, but I shaved his cheeks, blush, and I'll tell you. No, but I tell, I say what I do, which I try not to all the time, but when I do, everyone just tells me every story that's already happened to them sexually. So that's what happens.

We got to wrap it up. You're also, Adam is that sad? I know. It's been awesome. Adam been awesome Adam Ray. You're good. It was good. It was good for me. Was it good for you? Hey, I feel real good. Hey, so tell us all where we can Twitter. Yeah, Twitter is at Adam Ray comedy on Vine. It's Adam Ray. I don't do it a ton, but I've one of my friends is has like the number one Vine account. So I've done a few with her and now I've got like 20,000 followers. Oh my god that's amazing. Out of my TV. Out of my TV.com from my tour dates videos my albums on their podcasts about last night with Brad Williams. Everything it'll put all in

our site too. Yeah. So I'm gonna come okay. Love it. Thanks. Thanks so much everyone for listening to Sex with the Emily was it good for you. email me. Feedback at sexwiththeemley.com. You know, that was a really funny fun show. Thanks so much for listening. Adam, I have a question for you. Sure. One more. Have you ever felt, if you were an experience where you let's just say, didn't last as long as you wanted to in the bedroom?

Oh, no. No? Yeah, of course. Yeah, everyone has had it, right? Not, yeah. And you're kind of like, oh, it's weird. Would you say, never happens? No, no. no, yeah, yeah, everybody's had it right not yeah, and you're kind of like oh, where would you say it never happens? No, no, I was just like oops. Yeah, you're so excited. Yeah, or like man like that's that's that's an attachment to you Right, just a hot baby, but it's true. It is true. It is true Right, but sometime

It's true that she's so hot sometimes that you can't help but ejaculate But there is this thing, this product called Promessant. One in three men actually suffers from pre-mentarred ejaculation. Suffers, you like did it because she was so hot, but some guys they like can't last longer than a minute. It's a bummer. And it's a quickly absorbing delay spray that allows you to have the sex you want. So if you want to last longer, and- You just spray it on.

Yeah, and it's like, it's a desensitizing mildly. So you still feel it. Yeah, but you feel it and you wait like 10 minutes And she's actually really invention. It's brilliant It's just from the same guy who came up with the sham well exactly. It's the only FDA approved treatment for premature ejaculation But it's also for guys who just went on last longer So if you last for five minutes you last for ten doubles that because there's an orgasm gap some women They take don't have you with the women. Yes. Yeah, that's where they're like hey, oh, yo, we don't want to go on that long Right like right rightm gap. So women, they take, have you, have the women take long? Yes, yeah. That's where they're like, hey,

yo, we don't want to go on that long, right? Right, like, right. Oh, no, the women take long. The women don't. Right, but if a woman takes longer than you want it, you want it orgasm for she does. Like the women take 18 minutes,

guys typically take six to eight. So if you can't quite last as long, there's like a gap orgasmic gap. And this could close it because you could last longer. But you're saying some women finish before the guy. Yeah. And they're like, really, would you stop having sex already? I'm done. Sure. Yeah, I the speed closer because you could last longer, but you're saying some women finish before the guy Yeah, they're like really we just stop having sex already. I'm done sure yeah, I get that too

Okay, but we're talking about people who the spray. Yeah, it's a delays Promescent check it out only FDA proof treatment for premature jack Jack it's not Banaka. Don't put it in your mouth People made that stay they do I do that one to be weird Promescent PROMESCNT.com. So check it out. Thanks everyone for listening to XMLA, XMLA. Perhaps play a little game called Just a Tip. Just for a second, just a see how it feels.

Hey, this is Jordan Harbinger, host of the Art of Charm Podcast, the number one dating and relationship advice podcast in iTunes. I'm Emily Morse, host of the Sex with Emily Podcast, the number one sex and relationship podcast on iTunes and it's sexwithemily.com. And this is just the tip. So you know, it's funny. I haven't watched any porn since I started dating Jenny, other than with Jenny.

Wow, how did that come about? I don't know. I mean, it was just a thing where I just didn't feel the need to. And also because, you know, I've know a lot of guys that have like weird porn addictions a lot of guys do or they've porn actions Or they've shame they've like shame around their porn watching and they do alone they do a privacy But sometimes doing with your partner is a great way to connect and to kind of find out which she thinks is hot and what she thinks is Interesting and to explore your fantasies This is kind of like funny entertaining sex because it's not serious, it's all ridiculous anyway.

Right, but it gets you going, right? Right, it gets you going. Yeah, there's a lot of important information that you can learn too to having sex. So perhaps she has a fantasy about being with another woman, or maybe there's a poor flick showing women getting it on, that might get her going. So if your sex life's been a little sad, there's something that's going to be something fun. You can still do it on private, but they're also female friendly porn. They tend to have plots, you know, things like that.

The stuff that guys go, I need any of that. Or you can go to a sex store store together. You can go sex shopping. You can go to a toy store and buy some sexy clothes or a vibrator or something like that. There's a lot of different things that you could do. I said they're porn, though. Oh, yeah. I don't know.

Just make sense. Oh, go porn shopping at sex store, but you can go into the other end and buy porn tapes. Nobody buys porn stuff. Porn DVDs, right? Yeah, no, DVD tapes? Do you just say tapes? DVDs. Go buy some.

Please, to leave that. On my walk, man, I'm going to do it. I'm going to go buy some porn tapes. Okay. On your beta max player. My family had a beta max player. I'm sure they did. If you guys want to learn more from the art of charm about dating, relationships, and

even networking for business, visit us at theartofcharmpodcast.com. Or check us out on iTunes and follow me on Twitter at the art of charm. And take out the sectors of the M.A. podcast at sexofmley.com and on iTunes, if you want to have the best sex of your life that is, also follow me on Twitter at sex with Emily. Buying a car can be such a stressful experience, but true car is changing car buying forever. True car actually helps car buyers get rid of the fear that they might overpay, and that fear is the worst.

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