Sex With Emily - Sex Talk You Can Take Home to Mom

Episode Date: May 24, 2019

On today’s show, Emily is joined by Cam & KarenLee Poter from the podcast Sex Talk With My Mom. They talk about how to make sex a lot less awkward to talk about with – not only your family – but with anyone! They go over why talking and learning about sex can AND should be fun. Plus, Emily gives advice on what to do when your partner is getting too serious too fast, whether you should stay or go when you feel stuck in a slow-paced relationship, and your partner says they like going down on you, but they’ve only done it a few times – what’s the deal?! Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep the show FREE: Boston Scientific, Uberlube, Magic Wand, SiriusXM, Emily's Subscription Box. Follow Emily on all social: @sexwithemily For even more sex talk, tips, & tricks visit sexwithemily.com For more info on Sex Talk With My Mom, click HERE.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. On today's show, I'm joined by Cam and Karen Lee Poeter from the podcast Sex Talk With My Mom. And we're talking all about how to make sex a lot less awkward to talk about, with not only your family, but with anyone. Topics include why talking about sex and learning about it can and should be fun. What to do when your partner is getting too serious too fast? So should you stay or should you go? The age-old question of a slow-paced relationship. And your partner says they like going down on you but they've only done it a few times.

What's the deal? All this and more, thanks for listening. To his eyes, they're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions, bedroom eyes, they call them in a bag on day. Hey, Evelyn, you got a boyfriend? Cause my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got every stand, it's all mine.

The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common, but only? What do you mean, like laundry? It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm so so grown. Being bad feels pretty good. But you know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex, relationships, and everything in between. You can check out everything we've going on at sexwithemlee.com. I promise you you're going to find things there that will help you have the better sex and relationships and life that you are craving. Find me Monday through Friday on SiriusXM Radio, 5 to 7 pm Pacific, Channel Stars 109. You can go to sexwithemily.com slash SXM for a free trial, which I totally think you should do. You'll love it. Find me in our social media at Sex with Emily cross the board and I hope you guys enjoy

this interview with Sex Top with my mom. I am so excited to welcome my guests, Cam and Karen Lee Porter. It's Porter. Porter. Okay, why is it, I said that, okay, Porter. It's a Porter.

Porter, I knew that. I said it right before. Well, hello. Hello, I'm here with the cam. Well, that's the matter. It doesn't matter. Listen, they have a podcast and they've just did their 200th episode. Sex talk with my mom.

Hello. And you can find it all at sextechwithmymom.com and at sextalkwithmymom we'll put it all in the show notes, but thank you guys for being here because I'm really, that's awesome. You guys have been doing it a while? We've been doing a lot and it's been a fun ride talking to my mom about sex.

I mean, right. And at first people, it's funny because they had me do a video, you had me do a thing. You're like, what did you think when you first heard it? The heard of this title, I'm like, I think it sounds like awesome because while I'm also in the business like that, it makes so much sense.

I don't know what other people thought, but to me, it's like, and then you guys are hilarious together. Thank you. You said, I've like mom envy. All I wanted was like, Karen Leedewon, mom. I know that's what, it got cut off right when you said that. I was like, I know what you're gonna say. I said, they got cut off.

Okay, well, I, well, I want you to do it. I want you to do it. Yeah, thank you for doing that. Of course, of course. I hope everyone's mom. You are though. But like, okay, so you've want you to do it. Yeah, thank you for doing that. Of course, of course I'm everyone's mom you are though, but like okay, so you've been doing it out for a few you have a year's No 200 episodes three and a half years. Okay, so what what have you what have you learned about that? What have you learned about? Cam people definitely knows more than me now. I don't take it over I know a lot about sex toys now, but I'm still learning experientially and rapidly.

My thoughts on Conolingus have completely changed. That's right. That's right. Recently. Recently again. It's an evolution of Conolingus. Okay, give me this. How was your Conolingual change?

I started reading. So my mom has been suggesting her her she comes first for years. In-corner changed my life back in 2000s, whatever, three, I think my copy is like, every man should read. Every person should read she comes first. Exactly. It is unbelievable.

I never read it. Because she was recommending it. I can't even listen to my fucking mom. Exactly. We're not a swan here, right? I recommend it to everyone. Okay. Because it's a book that's Ian Karner, who I'm a huge fan'm fucking mom. Exactly. We're not a swine here, right? I recommend it to everyone. Okay. Because it's a book that's E. Inkarner,

who I'm a huge fan of E. Inkarner, he's like, she comes first. They get the woman comes, you make her come and here's how you do it. He has great tips. And then you're like, oh, I get it. And then guys are like, I just gonna go in there and jackhammer her and I'm like, no, you can't.

I'm gonna come first. I put it in the back of the day. I'm not gonna die as I remember. I'm gonna die as I remember. I'm gonna die as I remember. I'm gonna die as I remember. I'm gonna back in the days. That's gonna die as I remember. I got the days with their facts in the name. Well, it's a minigriff. I don't know, I didn't care about what that was. Well, as before, in 2003, whatever method of facts, fact photocopying I did, I somehow got the photocopy

to every boyfriend that I was with. Oh, good. But, well, not in 2003, after my husband passed away. He's like, dad was the right. Yeah, what the hell? I probably gave it to your dad. You gave my dad a copy of she comes first. Just certain instructions.

Just passing it down. I understand. Okay, so tell me what you learned from it. Okay, so here's the big change. I think before I was always like, to be good at sex, you're like, I'm gonna fuck the shit out of her. That's like the general vibe, right? Which I was never capable of.

I was never fucking the shit out of everyone. It is because I would hand them belly quickly. Thank you, mother. I got some promising. I know this, I'm like, I know this fucking logo. I know exactly what that is. Yeah, anyways, but I'm starting to read this book fucking logo. I know exactly what that is. Yeah. Yeah.

Anyway, but I'm starting to read this book. Because his book was Cam Comes First. The night. No. No matter what. Cam Comes First. Oh, it's Cam Comes First. That's a good one.

That could be our new play. If it starts, Cam is coming. It could be our new logo. Cam Comes First. Anyway. I'm literally tearing up over it. Okay, so. She.

Not anymore. Not anymore. up over it. Okay, so she... Not anymore! Not anymore! Like two pages in, my whole mindset and how we approach sex completely changed. It's like, he's all about like, you can pleasure, you can provide pleasure with your mouth and that's like often way better than any sort of penetration. Yeah, and you're like, what?

It's not about my penis. Bingo. Yeah. I cared so much about it. I've been saying that for years. Why all of a sudden was this kind of relationship? My mom's don't care. I have fun in that.

I have fun in that. It's like, goes in one year and it just goes out to like an abyss. It's not even close to coming back. Yeah. You know when they show the things, those little drawings of what men's brain, like mom's advice is outside the brain.

You've got to escape somewhere. Right, so you're right, so this is so true. So you learn, so just recently, you're like, oh, so after even after three and a half years, and even of us being friends, you still thought I'm gonna fuck this shit out of her. Yes, yes. Oh, I feel like I don't know what I wanna do.

It isn't a no. I'm just like, I don't even know the bar mitzvah. I am. It feels like coming out. This is what it feels like. Wow, so have you had a chance to put it into action? No, so I got to, I got to, I got to, I got to, I can't do teach, I hear ya.

Yeah, I got so excited about it and then I was like, oh well still could get a lot of diseases if I just like start going out there right just going down And I'm going down everyone I was ready. I started with the first 70 pages I'm ready to just go down on literally anyone and then I was like well, hold on we got to you know Just like take us slowly here because still some risk involved right okay. Yeah, so what would you find some I get it? It's so true the mom you were right still some risk involved. Right. Okay. Yeah. So what would you find? I can't. It's so true. The mom, you were right. Maybe.

Okay. So I'm glad you listened. Thank you. Karely. This is how I feel. Is that in you guys can call us if you'd like, triple eight, nine, four, seven, eight, two, seven, seven. I mean, sex talk with my mom, right?

Like, would you try, let's just talk about that for a minute. When you guys were, when you were really, when you, when you came with a young boy. Yes. Did you guys talk about sex openly in Chicago? Yes. Yeah, I wasn't having a lot of it. Right. That's why I was using a chop. It's basically like why aren't you having sex? Yeah, it's still a question. The conversation hasn't changed for time. The conversation's been the same. Right, right. But like you were more open about it and more than most people. Yeah, she was the cool mom. We're talking about it. Right, right. But like you were more open about it and more than most people.

Yeah. She was the cool mom. Yeah, cool mom. You know, the kids are the cool mom. I'm very, very cool. Yeah. I'm sexy. Sex, sex, sex.

What's your YouTube? Do you still, can people look at you? I do. Karen Lee love. Karen Lee love. We're going to put everything in the show now. Okay. She's amazing.

Oh, thank you. A coolers guide to getting your ass back out there, still in your bio. So that's, is that what you're, oh yeah. that's your book. And I'm writing another book though. This book is going to be called the secrets of dating older women. Because all these young guys want information on that. Please, I think you guys are blowing my freaking mind. Tell me about the tips for dating older women. We are audience here is like waiting with beta breath as am I?

Oh, well, there's a lot of reasons why dating older works, that relationship of younger guy, older woman, not the least of it is the woman has a lot more experience. So if you've got a young guy that doesn't know what the hell he's doing and hasn't read Ian Kurner's book, then not a sponsor, but we love him. He's been a guest. And older't read Ian Kurner's book. Then- Not a sponsor, but we love him. He's been a guest. And over a later, well, an older woman can do a lot of teaching and molding and it works for both. And it's also great if you're not wanting a relationship because you're like, this is

the big thing. This is the thing, yeah. Well, how do you, so are you date, you date younger men? Not anymore. I've been in that same younger guy for 11 years. He's not that much younger, but, you know, he's younger. Wait, I'm in here too. I met him. Yeah, you 11 years. He's not that much younger, but you know, he's younger. Wait, I'm in. I met him. Yeah, you met him.

He's lovely. He's a different younger. I met him. He's 15 years younger. Oh. But I met like, hero. I'm talking like, you know, if you're like, when I was first single, I was a single at 47. Okay.

And I've been married for 24 years. I don't want another older guy I wanted like the young guy that there's no you know expectations obligations Yeah, it works the right to talk and about and then did you find that then when you're 47 Were you dating men who were like 27? Yeah, I wouldn't To 30 It's happened again 30 and up. Okay, okay, right. That makes sense I was happy to get 30 and-in-up. Okay, okay, right, that makes sense. I was happy to get 30-in-up, meaning it was usually much lower.

I'm telling you, I have some nice, in a state of shock when I became single because I was like, these young guys are coming up to me with bold, big balls, I steal or something, I'm gonna come up and flirting with me and I'm older, I'm older. These are the guys that think I can fuck the shit out of her. They don't need ink her anymore. Well, what are they thinking? Because you're a young gent.

If you were, look, I know what your mom, not your dad. You're not gonna get your mom. I'm not gonna get your mom. It's my favorite. Things are about gent. Can't, but like really, do you or your friends, I don't know if you have an older woman thing.

Do you sleep with older women? I'm open to it. I'm deaf, not my mother's age. No, wait. But you think, but maybe 15 or 10 or? But do you think that that maybe 15 or 10 or. But do you think that that's what guys are thinking? Still, like, I want to fuck this.

They're looking at her going, but why are they attracted to an older, rather than someone there on age, because they could learn? Do they think they're thinking I want to learn something? No, I think that, I think there's two reasons. Number one is that usually they have a lot of confidence at this age. Yeah.

If they're single and they're going out there and they look like, like how my mother dresses, that you know that this age. Yeah. If they're single and they're going out there and they look like how my mother dresses, you know that this person carries confidence. Oh, fuck, I'm just saying. You do. Sounds like I'm walking around like a slut. She looks beautiful. You look beautiful.

What are you putting on my mother's clothes? This is not how you typically dress to like a bar. And I, I know what was going on. You're just being pictures. I'm walking around like something. You're described you and your friend you described her as like Betty Boop in like a very like okay we're talking about when I first became single I was like whoa I'm single I can go out you know let it all hang out flaunted see

it's all right but it's fine good but it's good for you confidence so this is yeah so that's one reason the second reason he's writing the book this is bad. So that's one reason. The second reason? He's writing the book. You guys should write it together. But I go ahead. The second reason is that I think that younger women, they're looking more for the relationship. It's not always. Obviously, everyone's looking for something different.

But sometimes, if you're in this life phase, you're not necessarily looking for the same. You're not trying to build a family. Right. It's not dirty out. Yeah. So it's parented. So been there, done that. There can be overlap in that. You both are looking to build a family. You're not. It's already out. Yeah. So it's parented. So it's been there.

It's done that. There can be overlap in that. You both are looking just for a companionship and a fun time. But I think the confidence is really key. That's key. It is key. So what would your tip, like I feel like the confidence does come as your older.

And I think I thought I was confident, but now I'm more confident. But how do you advise people like, I don't know, were you always confident? Or do you think you had to get more confident? I how do you advise people like, I don't know, were you always confident or do you think you had to get more confident? I was trying to break it down for the youngins. I was like, I don't know why I'm talking like this right now, but I do think that.

I'm like, well, I think I always, I don't know where being stupid is a cure, but I definitely know now, like how to get off what I need. What we're doing, I'm gonna fuck around with that sex. No, I'm not gonna fuck around with that sex. Why would you never fake an orgasm? That's for, okay, I'm on the same page as you.

You know that. So I just think the confidence that I hit is actually definitely grew by being in a marriage for 24 years. I mean, come on. You're experimenting. You're doing stuff. You're trying stuff. You have to be open to what you want.

You're not scared of walking around naked. Right. And that's part of it is the body confidence. Because you were thinking about this yesterday, we opened the show, we're like, so many meldas are called in, they're like, but they're like, I, my boyfriend said I wasn't sexual and I feel like I'm not a sexual person. But she says, I feel like I am, I love sex, but he says I'm not sexual. We're thinking, what does that mean to be a sexual person?

And I was just thinking, does it someone who talks about sex a lot? Someone who masturbates a lot is Is she more like you know is she not dressing too sexy and she gets to decide? I'm like he doesn't have to label you like if you're feeling sexual But of course maybe there's some things you could you know, it's confidence. It's being in your body really enjoying it I think and being a venture some having fun. It's a whole vibe It's a vibe right, you know know you can feel when someone's like dripping Oh, man. Yeah, dripping dripping. This is just I just started remembering I remember this girl

I was I was talking oh god. I Heard you read your DM's tooth. I want to read oh My sliding into my DM's is like a fucking disaster anyway Oh my god, sliding into my deans is like a fucking disaster. Anyway. Go dripping. Go dripping. Back to dripping. This girl, I fell in love with his French girl named Beverly.

This girl was dripping with sexuality. Like oozing sexiness. You met her in person? You met her in person? Yeah. You met her in person? Yeah, it's one of the few. I actually met her in person.

I go build it. And then it was just a mismatch. That was the one thing that was holding together. Yes, one of the few actually meeting person I don't build it and then just you know It was just a mismatch that like that was the one thing that was holding Very nice to you and I was not happy with it. Oh God wait the mom Mama bear came in That was very upset with that okay, so explain to me what Beverly bitch Don't come around here no more Beverly not welcome. Oh my god. She would actually She would be welcome actually. No, she would not. No, I think she'd be welcome. She's in spots. What do you mean?

She'd be well maybe she was so mean to you. All right, relax. She was. She had you buy her a drink and then she went off With some other other guy. It was a bad night. It was a bad night Mom's never forget I actually forgot this you remember I said I can't believe you remember this It must have been five years ago This is amazing Which is so what what didn't mean that she was oozing sex that would help us yeah It's it's such an aim like how do you describe that it's like you want you But you couldn't you would want to fuck this the shit out of her, but you wouldn't know that you know that you don't do that If you it's just like this

It's like an error of like I don't give a fuck right, you know, she didn't know about your Expertise at Conolingus well, you could leave that no, I mean, I can Well, you could leave that. No, I mean, you could leave it back. Yeah, what do you say? I can't actually, I can't. I have definitely had guys leave with that. They say to me, and that was like one of the first things that it was actually turned off. Yeah, I agree.

You can't leave with it. Yeah, I can, I can. I can't leave with it. I can make you come on. Oh my god. Same, like you. Yeah, why? You don't know me.

Oh, my Volvo. Oh, okay, so that's why this. It's not like, oh, this is just an excuse. Like, I. Like you. Why? I don't know me. I'm available. Oh, okay, so that's why it is. It's not like, oh, this is just an excuse. Like, I'm really good. He's compensating for other things. And he's not good. A guy who's telling you he's good.

Someone who's telling you they're funny is not funny. Right, right, right. No, I swear I'm funny. I'm really funny. Although I think I did that yesterday. Someone but I was like, oh, you've heard the show. I'm funny. You know what I mean?

The guy's like, I'm really funny. Like, show, show, don't tell. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So he's being able to shoot or I'm going to make you cut. I mean the guys like I'm really funny like show show don't tell oh Yeah, yeah, you're gonna flip the shit out. He's he's or I'm gonna make you cut. I don't know Yeah, that is such a tricky. It's a trick. It's it's tricky. You know kind of figure out how you're gonna um you know How you what if you guys learn though about sex tell me that you've been doing this holy shit What every what you had your sex life gotten better like I know mine has after 14 years like I started because my sex life gotten better. Like I know mine has after 14 years, like I started because my sex life wasn't like 12 I was like my sex life sucked. I was like I'm hard in myself. So maybe it's fine, but I just thought it could be so much better And I know I've learned stuff still learning stuff all the time But I definitely I feel like my relationships have improved. What about you guys?

I mean, it's a lot of talking to you in a three-half years sex talk with my mom is their podcast I mean, I think my knowledge of sex change a lot because of, it seems lately even, it's people are just some more open about exploring things like anal and I never heard the word pegging before. I mean, I hear what I mean. But even at like light SNM, if someone said to me, I want to do SNM, I'd be like, get the fuck away from me. What do you crazy about? You call, by the way, I want to do SNM, I'd be like, get the fuck away from me. What are you crazy about?

You call, by the way, I want to do SNM on you. Her body, it like, dumb sub, like dumb. What happened to that one? He showed up in handcuffs, he'd be like, get outta here. And I had friends and my friends said that to me, like, oh this guy wanted to like, you know, hit me and slap me, and I spanked me and I didn't, I was like, get away from me. I'm like, thinking, yeah, I used to have this thing like, thank me, it's spanked me and I didn't, I was like, get away from me. I'm like thinking, yeah, I used to have this thing like,

anal, and my butt says exit only, you know what I mean? That was like how it was, and now it's like, anal's a new black. Anal's a new black. Anal's a new blow job, I used to say, yeah, two that went out. Anal's a new blow. It is, like 2005 when I started, I was like, whoa.

You're a sewing podcast, I mean, declared this, anal's a new blow job because I feel like anal wasn't on the menu before that, I was like, whoa, you're a sewing podcast. I mean, declared this anil's a new blowjob because I feel like anil wasn't on the menu before that. I was like, I think it's because of porn. I mean, I mean, I mean, but play was but plays, but but what anil was expected. I mean, nobody's like sticking them, you know, I mean, it was very rare.

I had a friend once who said, oh, I do it once in a while. When it's the mood strikes me and I was like, oh, she does anil. What about her? Let's hear about this. To do you now like anil, I'm not still not a big fan. I like but play, she does anal. What about her? Let's hear about this. To do now, like anal? I'm not still not a big fan. I like butt play, but I'm just not a big fan of it.

I think I just like vagina. Yeah, that's fine. I got several holes. I got holes to choose from. What about you? Big fan. Yeah, I'm not a huge fan, but it depends. The right time, right place, right penis. penis. Yeah, I mean you get a giant

What makes a good penis for anal? Well, not a big one. That's my damn sure Super true Yeah, depending on but some but for some people they really just give me the biggest oh man Yeah, I don't know. I think it's more about, honestly, it's more about the connection I have with a person and liking their penis and feeling safe and feeling like I know it. That's how it feel inside me. So, yeah, but maybe it was massive. I don't think I've, yeah, it's a good question.

I had a penis I know in respect. I said I know in respect. I've had to respect it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've traveled together. We've tried to meal. We hung out. Like I know that penis. I could picture that penis. You don to respect it. Yeah, we've traveled together. We've tried to meal. We've hung out like I know that penis. I Could picture that penis. You don't want it. You don't want the I don't want to Rand O'Pineau

Yeah, this guy that says to me is they named his penis in high school the animal. Oh, okay So I'm thinking of myself and then I thought out loud and told them There's no anal going on over there with you If you're being called the anal, I'm going in. He thought to lead with that. Isn't that funny how we, like, I didn't say that he led with it.

It was just part of the conversation when I first met him. I'm thinking, eh, anal, never happening. Right, no. I gotcha. That's how I was on the menu. I mean, it doesn't have to be. Okay, so what about masturbation?

It's masturbate happy. Masturbation on. Thank you. Obviously, you guys knew that, right? I did. Because I feel like people in art profession, I've just been introducing it to my serious audience here, that it's a whole month that you get to do stuff.

That's another new thing. Okay, I mean, guys always talked about masturbating. Women never talked about masturbating. No, exactly. Never. I mean, we would do it, but we would be like hiding it, or we'd talk about it maybe with some girlfriend. But you would do those few girlfriends.

But you wouldn't talk about even with like my husband. I don't think I even told him I masturbated. Right. Because it was like, and that's still the world that a lot of people live in, that they're very fearful. We get a lot of calls here that people are like, I don't, I wish that my partner would masturbate and she doesn't, or confusion about why their partner does. Because we don't talk about it. And a lot of people are like, oh, she has would masturbate and she doesn't, or confusion about why their partner does,

because we don't talk about it. And a lot of people are like, oh, she has to masturbate. That means I'm not doing something right. And I'm like, no, that is not the case. Yeah, masturbation is just like part of life. It is part of a healthy life. Do you, are you recommending porn with masturbation?

Is that on the menu? You know, I recommend, I recommend porn. I love when couples watch porn together, because I think if you can find like any other way, inspiration or ways to kind of try something new or a new position and you're like, oh, we never thought about that. I never thought my leg over my shoulder

or whatever, your shoulder. That could be cool. I only, and I think finding porn that you like together, like, you know, Erica lost. Have you guys had Erica on your show? She's coming in right now. She's coming in right now. She's coming in right now.

She's coming in July. Okay, good. She's amazing. But she makes great porn for women that are from the female gaze. Stuff like that. So yeah, I'm not, honestly, like, I think that porn is great for many people, but just like a lot of things in moderation. It can also be.

Yeah, yeah. I recommend, my masturbation month thing is like, it's not like I think you should like up it, like start masturbating more frequently between this. Like I think it's more about, I'm like, I was giving a hand job with my fake penis in my hand, but it's more about exploring. Like how, is there other different ways

you could touch yourself? Could you edge with yourself? Could you bring yourself to Oregon? Could you have an orgasm with your eyes open yeah I can not like with the madam trying to think if I masturbating think about it all your girls in the room here yeah you can you know yeah no we got two no's one yes see that's like when you see it's like it the sneeze and keeping your eyes open and it's like impossible It's impossible. It's impossible.

I'm trying to think about it. Have you ever looked into someone's eyes when you're doing it? I have definitely. But then you like that one moment there. Yeah, and a guy's start closing. Yeah, close and time. I'm trying to think if it's like- I'm gonna have to put this to the test later.

I literally want to leave right now, do it. I don't know. I just want to keep on listening. Oh yeah, I'll call us. Do you guys do orgas do you orgasm without a do orgasm with your eyes open? Is that possible? Yeah, it's right now triplet 9478277. You can call us with anything. It's sex talk with my mom here Yeah, I definitely Florida has into with my eyes open. I think it's different with women than men Yeah, I from I think I'm convinced by the way,

the male orgasm now pales so far in comparison to the women orgasm. Right, that you learn that too, right? Yes, it's nothing. I'm like, why do we even bother? This is, you could start learning to have source orgasm without ejaculation. You missed that part of the conversation earlier.

Oh, wow. I have actually explored this. Yes, yes. I have explored this. I would welcome you to do that. There's a lot of experience. We are shit trying to do this. I was gonna ask you guys,

what have you guys done sexually or experienced since you started that you thought you wouldn't have or that's been the most like, if anything at all? Separately. Separately. Well, not together, they do not sex. They're just not sex They're just one of my attached point all again. Yeah, no, no not together If you want to go first

What about um Like since the podcast per se yeah, I'm just like more open mindedminded about just, you know, like my boyfriend. The reason he fell in love with me is because I reminded him of Nina Hartley, the point star. Oh, I love Nina. So we were having sex and he would literally be like, um, moves me aside so we could see the TV. Like, what the hell is that?

I learned she's a good friend to Nina. I love Nina. Yeah, I'm friends with her. I'm friends with her. You're like, hey, yeah. And he's always like, you know, hey, that's my free pass, right? And I'm like, yeah, probably if she wanted to, why not? You know, like listen, it doesn't, and I think in my past I would've been like,

what do you mean you want to have sex with someone else? But you know when you get older, you're just like, no, or we just more matured. I know that she's going to teach him stuff that's's gonna be like beneficial for me. Yeah, you're like It's all about you. It's all about your pleasure. That's a good one to learn. So this is this what you learn from doing the podcast That your boyfriend is into you know more open minded about sex and love and where those Interesting. Yeah, yeah How is my sex life changed? Yeah, I've gone to mom laugh I knew well, I've been to some some weird weird

Where is that I have? Yeah, I don't think I would have been as open to like some BDSM parties that I've been to Not that I did anything wild, but no I went you saw it. Yeah, no, that's the first you got in front of the door. Yeah, it's burning man Yeah, that's fun, did you love it? I did, and it was a struggle to survive, but it was good, it was fun. It's just because of the desert or the other stuff. Yes, yes, yes, but then,

I was spaking and weird shit. Yeah, I mean, I also think that just, just learn, I didn't know anything about sex. Right. And then you talk about it and you're like, oh wow, I didn't realize you could do that. I realized communication was like, obviously everyone knows that's.

We know you're a new vacation. New vacation is a new vacation. But it is wild that that is like the foundation of it all. New vacation? No, communication. Sorry, communication. Yeah, communication. Yeah.

It's the foundation. It's nuts. People like you took my blow jobs in anal all day I'm like sometimes yeah, but not all day. It's mostly about communication How do you talk about it to your partner and yourself and how do you stop the messages you have about what's good What's taboo? What's right? What's wrong? Like how do you even like? Yeah, can you get about it? Yeah, I was just talking to someone who He his whole journey right now is trying to talk about his ED with the person he's sleeping with. And it's so hard.

It's, yeah. It's got to talk about it. And then to say like, yeah, you know, we're just going to have second and second, I'm not going to focus on coming. And don't be offended if I don't come. It has nothing to do with you. But that's such a hard thing for someone to say. It's so hard.

Well, it's really hard to say it. And then it's also hard to know that it we're women to hear that because if a penis doesn't ejaculate, it is our fault. I mean, the act of all the things that fucked up on, and I'm not sexy, and he's not attractive to me. Like, we don't get it when the pain is malfunctions. Or in our online malfunctions. And it's not that it did, it's fine that you're pain.

So yeah, erectile dysfunction is a big thing. And also I think that couples need to, like, I think it's important that those cases, like your team, you team you're a team like I love that you went and talked about it But then also you guys are in it together like that's what I like to people understand that it's not one person's job to fix it alone Right, yeah, they both can kind of get on board with it. Yeah, right? Yeah, definitely I mean no, I had a lot of people, like recently, someone came up to me, a young guy, like 21 years old and he's asking me about super orgasms. He, you know, like, can I give my girlfriend a super orgasm?

And I'm like, where are you hearing these terms from? I mean, it's so much unknown about all of the stuff. And, and is that a thing of super orgasm? I don't know. I mean, that's so, I'm like, super man, it's like a big meal. Exactly. Super size, my orgasm.

I mean, I mean, maybe like it's a great orgasm. It was terrific. It was just super. I said the most terrific orgasm last night. Super mean. And I know you put a lot of pressure on yourself to give someone a super. Yes, just get the orgasm down. I mean, that's the whole thing I think.

If guys would just realize this one simple thing, girls, don't give a fuck about your dick and your coming and all that other stuff. If they don't, I mean, no one wants to pound it for 45 minutes. All we want is to have a good organ, some not ourselves. However you gotta get it, however you gotta give it to us. Yeah, just give it to us.

Let's do it together, but you know what? If you can't do it, I can live with that. You can live with it if they can't give you one? No, if you can't come. Oh, but you're fine. I'm gonna live with that. You're bad. Yeah, you're fine if you didn't come right.

But that gets to a certain, you have to understand that now where's a lot of women are like, I'm doing something wrong and women are pleasers. Many of us are like, oh, I gotta give, I gotta give. I don't care. But that's what I would love if I could teach my younger self or the younger people in my life, like my niece is and my friend's kids

and I'm just like, like I had one. She's like, I had this friend's with Benefit. She's like, 20, this is my niece. I got credit, she said I've been a lot of talk to her about her. I said, I'm like, what's the benefit? Like I'm giving her, like, she's like, well, I get to cuddle, I'm like, are you having orgasms?

No, I'm like, that is a friend of the deficit. I'm not a friend of the benefit. What is the benefit? She's like, oh, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm like, no, there's not a be a benefit. We don't know, women don't know. So I wish I could tell my younger self like, it's not about giving him great blood jobs.

It's not about whatever I was doing. What I did fake it in my 20s because I just wanted kids of pounding to stop already. Stop the pounding. I just thought, yeah, what I mean, that's the whole thing is, why can't we just say, hey, I'm tired. Let's go to bed.

We'll try this again in the morning. Exactly. Yeah, wish me that's what we learned. I wish my vision just to get people to talk about sex, like they're talking about the weather, like you guys do in a very non-confrontational fun way. Listening to Cambe Karen Lee, on sex talk with my mom. Congratulations on your podcast.

I have a few questions to ask you. Would you like to play a game of, would you rather? Yes. Okay. Would you rather have bad sex or no sex at all? That's a tough one. You both get to answer. Oh.

No sex. No sex. Okay. Uh, would you rather have four-played no sex or sex without four-play? Sex without four-play. Wait, four-play no sex? You could have four-played no sex. Oh, well, he wants to fuck this shit out of someone he can't just not enough time in the day okay would you rather be blindfolded or handcuffed during sex well based on what I just said about

uh orgasms with your eyes closed I guess I'd be blindfolded as fine. Yeah, okay. That's there. Cam. Oh, um, probably blindfolded as well. Okay. Yeah. Why did you take the handcuffs then? I could use handcuffs. We had a sponsor. I took a blindfold too. And he just like grabbed everything. I'm like, what are you grabbing everything? I need a little treasure chest. Yeah, he might, well be with someone who wants to be handcuffed. Yeah, I also like handcuffs. I don't have handcuffs for you if you need some more. Thank you, thank you.

I got a whole sex closet. He doesn't need them because he took them. Oh, all right, well, if you need them. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm sorry, if you need them. Yeah, I'm the one who has handcuffs. Yeah, I'm the one who has handcuffs.

Yeah, I'm the one who has handcuffs. Okay, here's what else you want here. What would be in my other... okay. Hmm, would you rather be terrible at foreplay or terrible at sex? This is very confusing. Because I was starting to think that the foreplay is the sex and now... It kind of is, I don't love this question because I like sexy more linear anyway do one another bonus question sure would you rather fart uncontrollably when you organize more cry and consolably

oh god damn definitely fart bonus question no no question farting big big big farting you can laugh after farting is hilarious for sure and rather cry really oh no because I don'ting. It's hilarious. I'm rather crying really

Oh, no, because I don't cry now, but when I cry I'm so happy Oh Happiness crying I was thinking tears of like I was like oh no, I just want to cry. I want to feel deep. I don't think I've ever had an orgasm I cried never never yeah No cry If you women do cry a lot of women do report crying after orgasm. And I have before, yeah, because it's so closely tied.

You're already, Ireland's like, it's aroused at your hormones. Or like excited but confused but happy and sad. It's all the things. It doesn't mean anything. It doesn't mean you're sad. It's just emotional. Okay, so I think I was very ignorant to this because the time I've heard people crying, it's like a triggered a memory of like a trauma or something like that.

Yeah, that's not my time. Well, that's if they're having a trauma response, breath, quickening in the role of the fetal position. But when I do it now, if it happens, I'm not saying I have, it's probably happened maybe once or twice a year of a good crying orgasm, but it's not uncontrollable. And then I cry and I'm like, no, no, it's good. It's okay. I'm happy.

Like I right away clarify like, no need to call 911 or don't run. Like I'm not, you know, like when I hear like a no need to call 911 or don't run like I'm not you know like when I hear like I'm not a lot of a concert like I'm gonna lie in the like cozy environment like at the Chicago theater or something like that and you hear this music and it just like goes over you and I could start crying right yeah but I don't know but okay yeah I'm just looking for an excuse to cry yeah I'm down the line. It's awesome great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience.

It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience.

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It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. It's a great experience. Google Play, I tune, say, with, where you can find my podcast, Sex Family, I'm trying to get bring, you know. Yeah, bring a lot of work. Do everything. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey I love answering your questions. It's why I'm here. Why exist on the planet? And if you want a question, answer on the show, go to my website, sexwith only.com. Click the Ask Emily tab, fill it the short form, or just email feedback at sexwith only.com. But please, please, please, always include your name, your age, where you live, and how

you listen to the show. Okay, let's first one comes to us from Jacob, who's 22, who did not give a location, but it's okay. We'll let that slide. Alright. He says, dear Emily, I've recently started listening to your podcast and I really enjoyed them really great advice. I've been with my girlfriend, who's also 22, for almost two years now, and we still haven't

had sex. She's a virgin and hasn't done anything sexual with anybody, I'm the first guy that she's kissed. At the beginning of our relationship, I was fine with her saying she's not ready, but it's been two years and she's not even warming up to the idea of having sex. I love her very much.

I'm not trying to press her to do anything she would regret, but every time I bring up the subject, it always ends with a fight and frustration. My question is whether I should just wait until she changes her mind or should we just break up. Thanks. All right, Jacob. Okay, so here's the thing.

Um, uh, two years, you have not sex, she's a virgin. Here's the thing she's probably just decided for whatever reason that, you know, could be her background, her culture, religion that she does wants to wait to have sex. You know, maybe till she's married or till she's a certain place in her life. So I, I mean, she probably didn't know how she was gonna feel in the relationship

and I'm sure you were assuming two years in, she'd be ready for it, but she's not. So I don't think it's breaking up or waiting until she changes her mind. There's something in between there and that would be a really honest conversation that you have with her and you say, you know what, I really love you, I love our relationship, but sex is something in her course. It's something that I really am interested in right now and I'd love to do with you and I don't wanna pressure you and I don't want you to feel like it's all that I care about but it certainly is something that I think is an important part

of having a healthy sexual relationship. So is this something that you think, you know, do you see it in the future at all? Are you waiting for marriage? I get more information from her. Because in your mind, she's just like, no, nothing's changed in two years, but maybe it has. Maybe she's closer. Maybe she's like absolutely waiting till marriage, in which case you get inside, am I ready to get married?

Is she my long-term plan? So I think having conversation that is not just breaking up with you, because this isn't working, but getting more information about where she's at, checking in, and then making your decision is the best way to go. Thank you, Jacob, for your email. I'm glad you found the show. Okay, this next one comes to us from a fellow Emily, 25 in Washington. Dear Emily, I'm very self-conscious of my odor and taste. I've had several partners give me oral, but have been too nervous about my smell and taste to enjoy it. I know that it's an issue because recently, a partner went down on me for a short time, quickly moved on to something else, and when we finished he left the room when he came back he clearly had used mouthwash. I shower nearly every day and have been

tested and there aren't any medical issues. I'm not sure what else I can do at this point other than warn partners and let them know that they don't have to go down on me. What can I do? How can I discuss this with partners? All right. Okay, Emily, I'm not sure. I don't see in here why you think you have some kind of odor or taste that isn't working. I got to be honest with you, you're 25. I'm just going to put this out there. Many people in their 20s do not get the oral that they require or deserve, that would feel good to them.

Your partners might just be doing the whole like like, one minute down there, dip, thinking that's all they have to do, and then come back up for sex. There's no indication that there's anything wrong with your odor or your taste. This is just like one experience. Maybe he does that with everyone he's with. He goes down for a minute,

you know, that's one of my huge pet peeves. I'm like, guy, it goes down to me for one minute, you could have left the room, got me glass of water, come back in, and that would have been way more effective than one minute downtown. I think it's important to always have shower after sex, go to the bathroom after sex, there are freshies, oh my god, we're obsessed with the fray, you guys know that I love the woo, more play lube, well now they have these thing called freshies and they're like

before and after sex wipes and they smell amazing. I feel like though, if that would just give you some more confidence, but I just don't think they should stop you from wanting to have oral sex. Yes, some women do have odors and they're not aware of it because it could be they have some kind of STD or something going on. They might have bacterial vaginosis, but unless you've been, yeah, I don't see any evidence here that there's been a problem. So I think you're fine, Emily.

I think you're fine. I just think they're not spending enough time. And of course, as women, we think, what's wrong with me? What did I do wrong? Whereas if a man had a woman go down in our M, for a minute, he might be like, what's her problem? Exactly. He would be like, he wouldn't be like, what's wrong with my-

She obviously doesn't like my penis. Yeah, no, not at all. And so about my penis is all penises. She doesn't do that. That's would be their first I'm not why is that it's because women were pleasers. We care. We just do that. I don't know, but Emily This is not about you. This is my US for you want and saying I love a man who goes downtown to me for a while stays there all night Mm-hmm half the night half the night

Let's see now. Yeah, that's my agenda. You don't have to doubt my own agenda. Yeah. OK, this next one comes to us from Anika, who's 22 in Michigan. Hi, Emily. I'm 22. I've gotten into a relationship with a 30-year-old man.

Started out as a spring break fling when I went back to my hometown of Myrtle Beach. We've known each other for years, but never got together for some reason or another before, probably my age. We started hooking up in the sex and connection we had was amazing. We've been doing long distance for two months now, but he's getting much more serious and uncomfortable with. He says he's never connected and likes someone as much as me, but I get very stressed about putting my life on hold to maintain a relationship with him. I'm in my 20s and don't want to regret this

time in my life. He feels this is a once in a lifetime connection and he has the experience to tell, but I do not. I don't know if I'll ever connect with someone as well emotionally and sexually again, help. What should I do? Okay, Anika, let me tell you something. At 22 years old, you're exactly where you should be. You meet someone, you have a connection that you've never felt before, because let's be honest.

You haven't been out, had the experience to meet a lot of different people yet. You just haven't. And so whenever you have those first pangs with someone, you have these feelings in your 20s. Every time you end it with someone or meet someone, that you'll never meet someone as great as this person. But I got to tell you that's just a fallacy.

You will find that person, and you're not going to spend your life regretting that you're not with this 30-year-old guy, who yes, he has more years than you, but it doesn't mean that, you know, he's feeling this experience and that could also be intoxicating that he's saying to you, oh my God, this connection is once in a lifetime, you know, it's like someone's trying to sell you something on the street and they woke up to you like, this is a rare gem.

You must buy it. We only have three left and it's so precious and you'd be like, oh my God, I've never wanted a rare gem, but that rare gem looks great. And maybe I could make it into a ring or I could make it a break. You don't know. He's selling this to you in a way that not because he's trying to do something that's like nefarious. It's more that he really feels it. But I think that you just said that you're not ready for it.

It's been long distance for two months. He's getting more serious than you're comfortable with right now. Please pay attention to that That's all I heard in here that I want you to narrow on that's the part that's about you That's not about him telling you he's got some rare gem of a connection that you'll never get again So if you're not comfortable with it You're still you're in your 20s. You're gonna find other people other experiences and just telling me got it You got to cool it down a little bit and I'm take time to date other people date other people. Yeah, I don't like this. I understand it, but I just think if I could stop everybody here from thinking that you're

never going to feel however you're feeling now again, it's just not true. There are people who become widowed later in life or whatever happens to people, you will find love if that's something that you're interested in. So just staying with someone because you believe it won't happen again is no reason to stay. Yeah, and I wonder, I hope he's not like trying to fill her head either. What sounds like it, because she's like he's 30,

so he has more year, what she says, she said. Yeah, like he's got the experience. He's got the experience to know that this is something special. And it sounds a little bit. It sounds a little bit too. Yeah, so that's a significant age difference in your 20s too. It is.

In different places. It's weird. I didn't start dating people in their 30s until 23. Yeah. Like I really didn't feel ready and then all of a sudden I was like, now I feel like I can do that. Yeah. All right, Anacock, keep doing you.

Okay, let's get to Matt. He's 35 from the south. He writes, Anika, keep doing you. Okay, let's get to Matt. He's 35 from the South. He writes, Hi, Emily, my wife and I have discussed voyeurism and the possibility of being watched via webcam. While it sounds hot, it's a little scary to put yourself out there. Is there any source of videos that can be used

as a tool in roleplaying this out or a recording, but pretending it's a live person or a person egging us on telling us to do, et cetera, thanks. All right, okay, Matt, here's the thing. I understand that voyeurism is hot and being watched webcam, all that, but it is scary and you have to realize people could be recording it, that you're putting yourself out there

like your neighbor could be watching your friends from high school, who knows who's gonna be on it? But I like the idea of playing it out. Like why not just use your own camera and kind of fake it and be like, okay, hey, right now they're watching us. Oh, you know, Barbie from Minnesota is asking us a question, babe, like you could just kind of fake it and really get into it.

Like you guys know that role-playing actually works. So just kind of get into your, you know, your moment. Maybe you guys could also first watch it some other webcams together And then that would also give you ideas to say like what what actually really happens I think just faking it with a camera setup watching it after and then like recording you could even record it your voices Like and telling you guys to do stuff and playing during sex You could even just be like right now. I want you to go down on him or go down on her

And you could just play it in the background like it's somebody else saying it, but really it's your voice. So then you guys can really be focused and see like, how does that feel? What do we think about that? And just take a little bit deeper online and watch some other webcams and see it, it's just the kind of stuff we actually want to do. But I love that you're really, that you're being hesitant about it and that you're actually taking pause and doing all the right things and that would be role-playing it, talking it through and seeing how it really landed you

before you jump into the webcam waters. That actually sounds really fun. It doesn't just record yourself beforehand and then play it and then see if you can do it still. I love it. Or like, yeah, I think people need to use their imaginations more. They do.

Remember when imaginations were all we had, when we were kids, it was fun. We stopped because people tell us we're weird or got a study What I did So I think it is fun to use your imagination with your lover mm-hmm Okay, it's this next one comes to us from Noel who's 22 in Indiana. Hi, Emily I'm so glad I found your show as it's helped me navigate many of the insecurities I've faced in my relationships. However, I do have one thing that I just don't know how to figure out. About two years ago, it's sexually

assaulted by someone close to me. Since then, I've been completely celibate. I feel that I've healed from this experience for the most part, except for coming to terms with having sex again. I've had little desire to have sex until I met my current partner. We've been seeing each other for a few months and he's very understanding about my hesitation. I trust him completely and I so badly want to take the next step and have sex with him, but I'm so uncomfortable with it. He mentioned to me that he noticed that I flinch when he kisses me. I'm aware this is 100% in my own head and it's been so long since it's happened. I'm ready to get back out there and do it again. Do you have any advice?

Mm. Okay, no, this is a really good question because first of all, I'm sorry for what you've been through. It's sexual assault is not an easy thing. It's actually traumatic. Really, I know that you think that you're past it, but I'm curious if you've had any really great therapy around it

because that's gonna be the only way that you're truly going to get through it I think sometimes we make the mistake of thinking since time has passed That we're okay with it because we thought about it a lot. It doesn't hurt as much The truth around that is that it actually gets more deeply repressed into our system, but it's still there for example He kisses you and you flinch and you are hesitant about sex. So what I really want you to do is focus on your mental health and I'd love you to find a therapist who specializes in trauma work and sexual assault work. Not just a regular therapist, maybe they do

EMDR therapy, which is a really revolutionary transformative therapy and just kind of talking it through with a professional will allow you to get out of your head. It's not time just passing or a part of that you love. It's you doing the work. Now you could also do the work and be sharing this with your partner what you guys are talking about in therapy, but I would take some of the pressure off of yourself for sex and put that energy into finding a really good therapist where you live. Thanks Noel.

Okay. As of luck to you. She also, she was really cute and she sent the email. She put in a trigger warning for sexual assault. Oh my God. Thank you. So sweet. Noel, this is so, and I'm so thank you for opening up and sharing this with us because it's just so common. It's more common than we think. And I mean, I just had a conversation with a new friend and you know, she's like 45 and she's still dealing with being assaulted when she was six.

She said she remembers, she just recently remembered a family member assaulting her and and she still is realizes that it and she's gone through marriage and divorce and she has kids and she still realizes that it's had a hold on her since then. And she feels uncomfortable and through her parts of her body, they're touched. So all I'm telling you is Nicole even doesn't feel like it at 22. You're ahead of the game in the sense of you know that it happened. And now you can really do the work that will help you release it. So you don't have to wake up at 45 and see like you're still going through some

of the same things. Because my friend hadn't had therapy there and I was talking to her about that. Hmm. Yeah, it's important. It's important, you guys. I'm telling you. This last one comes to us from Cindy, who's 53 in Colorado. Dear Emily, when I first met my boyfriend, he said he loves Connolegus.

But I've been with him for two years, and he's only done it for me five times, and I've had to ask. I've asked him if he doesn't like my vulva, he uses the excuse that he just enjoys penetration more. Not sure if this matters, but he was married for 20 years and she cheated on him multiple times. Oh, well, I don't know if that's relevant about the cheating part, but we could get back to that in a minute.

Cindy, I think two years and he's going on down in you five times, I would think that there's either there's a few things going down in here. He might actually just, if he was married for 20 years, it doesn't mean that he's like a great kind of linguist that he loved going down his wife and not you. I would say that he probably got with her in his 20s and he never really got into it. She didn't demand it of him, she didn't ask for it.

And then therefore he maybe, he's not owned his skills, right? There's some women that don't like it. And so for whatever reasons, they just don't. So maybe he is actually maybe a little bit more insecure about his skills to go down. And in his mind, if he hasn't been doing it a lot, he just truly believes he prefers penetration more. Has been so many years since he's done it. So I would let him know that outside the bedroom, tell him that it's not just an option for you that you actually require oral sex and you love receiving it and you think

it would be so hot. And you'd say, I know you like penetration a lot and I like it too, but this is a requirement for me. Is this something that we could talk about? Would you be on board for this more? So I'd be happy to show you what I like and what feels good to me. But it's really, I think it's an important part of a healthy sex life for me and then see what he says. And if he's like, nope, not my jam or yeah, actually, I'd love to know what you like, you know. See where it goes from there. Because this happened to me once and he said,

you know what, oral sex isn't my thing. And I said, well then, you know, you're not my thing. And I left the relationship. There were other problems in the relationship and now that I know more, maybe I would have been like, what do you mean by that? It's not your thing, because I really love the guy.

There were other problems. But I think that sometimes it's just because guys don't know, maybe some guys don't like it, but they just also need some more information or they need to know how to do it better. They need some tips. Because I think if a guy is really master, like when you really master or giving a blowjob,

like you feel good about it when you're confident and enthusiastic and confident in your skills and connected to your partner. So maybe he hasn't had those like secure performing oral sex experiences where he got endorsed for it. There was like endorsed. It was like, that was amazing. I love to be. Maybe he's always felt like it was an awkward thing.

Just like everything. If you never learned it, your oral experience was endorsed by Sally. Yeah, he got a great Yelp review. He maybe you never got a five star oral yet Yelp review and I feel bad for him. So do some teaching there. See if he's down to pleasing you. You're in your 50s. I'm going to see me about your age and at this point, he should be willing to please you or not.

That's how I feel. All right, guys, great questions. I hope you enjoyed this show. We love sex talk with my mom. Thank you for being on. Thanks to my amazing team, Ken, Kristen, Michelle, producer, Jamie, and Michael. Was it good for you? Email me. Feedback at sexwithamlee.com.