Sex With Emily - Sex with Emily: Casual, Loud and Proud

Episode Date: June 20, 2017

We all have our own idea of how sex and dating should be, but are we assuming too much? On today’s show, Emily is here to give you new perspectives to take your sex and dating life by storm, with a little help from Menace! Are you self-conscious about your curved member? What’s the deal with voyeurism? Swiping right on casual, but can’t seem to find a willing FWB? Emily and Menace share their thoughts on these sexual debacles and more, plus they go over the ten types of noises men make during sex, from grunts to squeals. Tune in for more than just the tip! Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep this podcast free: Let's Get Checked, Jo Lube, We-Vibe, and Magic Wand. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey everyone, thanks for listening to Sex with Emily and today's show I'm helping you navigate your sex dating and relationship questions. Topics include, Those noises guys make during sex. Is it curved penis a problem? How to find a friend with benefits relationship and how to keep things hot and spicy in the bedroom? All this and more, thanks for listening. Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions.

Betrubized they call them a lie on me. Hey, Emily. You got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got a hair stand. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage. Is it a common moment? What do you mean, like laundry? It shrinks?

Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my God, I'm off here. So, I'm gone. Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between for more information.

Go to sextheembley.com where you can check out all of our podcast, set it for our mailing list, easily subscribe, find us everywhere now, find us in iTunes, Google Play SoundCloud, Spotify, God, we're everywhere, we're everywhere, right, menace? I love it. I love it.

I know. You're even on Spotify, look at you, that's like advanced stuff. I'm not even on Spotify. You're not? No. I can talk to people. I would have done it, but I got distracted from the person that I was talking to you. Somebody I used to work for actually handles the podcast department at Spotify. I think they just take, I don't know if they've been selective about the podcast that they take.

Yeah, I don't know now, but this was like a year ago. Right. I like that you're taking the initiative and I'm like, No, they came to me. I'm like falling flat. Like two years ago when they were starting, we were one of their first podcasts. And now, apparently, it's like on the homepage. Like you like podcasts, you might like some of this sex with that.

That's great. It's true. It's really good. And what else have to say here? I'm happy to be here with you. I'm so happy to see you too. Yeah, I haven't seen you forever. It feels like 16 months. It has been. But I'm happy to be here with you. I'm so happy to see you too. I haven't seen you forever. It feels like 16 months.

It has been. But I'm glad you're here as well. I just, I hear about you, I think about you. I miss you in my heart. People always comment stuff like, men just told me to do this. So I did it like in the Instagram stuff. I know they're like, I know men just gonna be happy

because I did this or that, it's funny. People listen to you. Weirdly. I know. I don't know about your sex advice, but they listen to you by doing some of those media. Oh, my sex advice is solid.

Yeah, totally. I, what else I was gonna say here is that, do you know, Matt, is that we have so many podcasts that they're not, they can't all be available everywhere, except for on our website, sectionelmy.com slash podcasts, because 12 years podcasts are live in there. So if you guys want our entire archive,

because people email, they're like, I'm binging, they binge on in the show. Because we're addictive, I guess. I suppose it feels like it's a healthy addiction. Well, it's crazy when people say that they go on like these really long road trips and then they listen to the whole thing and I go, wow, we were the entertainment

for your entire road trip. That's awesome. Thank you so much. But the voices in your head that are changing your life. So what's been going on with the show lately? Well, the show must go on. Yes. You win. You're not here.

We had Cindy Darnall in. She was here a few weeks ago and God, her show was so good. She's Australian. She's like the leading sex educator in Australia. Oh, nice. The listeners we have down under. It was a really great show. People were actually like snapping me and tweeting me. They're like, thank you for introducing me to Cindy,

but she's so cool. We talked a lot about Miss Matsuobito's, how to spice things up in the bedroom, why people don't talk about that. She talks about Australia because I want to go to Australia badly. Do everyone wants us to come to Australia? And then Brandy Glanvo is on from the Ohio's White House,

or she wasn't my housewife. So I'm a podcast. You know Brandy. Yeah, Brandy, I've met Brandy many times in an event with her. She's super big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show.

She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big fan of the show. She's a big, I did not like Brandi until I heard on her show. It was a different side than I really liked. She was like, out there, I went everything, but it was fun.

Because on television, you, I mean, it's edited to whatever they want to make you out to. So, yeah, me and her, you get a different experience. Sometimes it's really, really fun and interesting. Exactly. But yeah, I'm sure that podcast was awesome. I'm definitely gonna go check that out. Check it out, ma'am. Check it out on the feed. Brandy Glanville. Yeah, what's going on with you? Are you traveling? Of course, I'm always traveling when I'm not working.

If I get a couple days off, I go somewhere. So I just recently booked a trip to the Dominican Republic. Awesome. When you're going. Where are you going? Exactly. I have no idea. I just don't want the Dominican Republic. No, that's amazing. Yeah. And no idea. I just don't want the Dominican Republic. No, that's amazing. I know a lot of who have been there. Good for you. But, with the Ruffan, with my Ruffan, yes. And this is, you know, this is something

that we've always talked about, like just being somewhere else other than your normal routine. You end up just having more sex for somebody. Yeah, absolutely. Vacation sex is always the best. I know vacations are expensive and maybe like you can't just pick up and just go somewhere. But there's always hotel tonight. You know, the apps that always promote, you can save a bunch of money, just even go into hotel like a staycation

or whatever, just changing up your location gives you, I don't know, like a euphoric feeling, does it? Yes, it does, no honey, yes. Yes, we've talked about that over the years. This is the time of year to really hammer that home that if you guys have not, if you have kids, I'm not even gonna say that. If you have kids, you absolutely have to take a trip without the kids.

I've met people who are like our kids are eight and six and we've never ever gone away without them for a night. There is a problem there. Parents, you still need to commit to each other and have that intimacy without the kids around. So if you have to go to the motel six for a night, have even having sex in another part of the house, having sex outside, you know, it does changing up the location, it is new.

And that does give you the spike in adrenaline and oxytocin and all that stuff when you're trying something new, dopamine, yes, vacation sex is huge, no matter how you do it, where you do it, how you slice it, it's important to get away. It's so funny you say that about the parents, believe it or not, I was in Las Vegas. And there was this couple that I've known forever and they have kids and they're like,

you know what, this is the first time that we've been away from the kids in 10 years for a weekend. A weekend. A weekend trip. A trip, you know. But there's something that you have to have, you know, because I have co-workers have kids and they get burnt out. They're like, dude, I hate your Instagram account because you're like always going and doing something. I'm like, look, you can go ahead and go and do something. I

know it's scary because I mean, I can't speak on behalf of people that have children because I don't have them. But I know there's probably scary to leave them in somebody else's hands. But you still got to live your life. You can't wait 18 years until they grow up to go out and do things. It's so true. You know what, I know this is a cliche, but again, you could die tomorrow. You can.

It's true. You know, and then what did you do? You just sat around and did nothing. Well, you were great parents, and you were raised in children, but kids know if you guys are not connected anymore, and I don't see how you can still kind of work on your relationship, be great parents,

and you want to be a role-housing parent, being happy, you want to show your kids that you guys are connected and that you're intimate, romantic, I'm not saying having sex in front of them, but they can tell when parents are connected and when they're not connected, obviously. They can tell parents are bored

and they feel like they're in a routine. They told kids are... I just even wanted two nights away when you're like, wow, the kids aren't here and you're mixing it up and you have to worry about changing the sheets and you can just go somewhere and do it. I'm telling you, it does, it does world for the relationship and if you haven't done like book that trip now.

Do it. It's the best. So just recently, I had an event in Long Beach, California before I forget and this sex sex with Emily listener came up. And so I'm there with the whole Woody Shock Crew, which is a morning show that I'm part of. And we're doing this meet and greet, we're meeting all these people.

And this girl comes up, she's like, oh my God, menace, I love you on sex with Emily. She goes in front of everybody, she goes, meeting you is like meeting Brad Pitt. And I'm like, well, it was really cool because she's actually, she was really attractive. Her name was Allison, so big shout out to Allison. Oh my God, Allison, I love you. And yeah, so everyone's like shocked that she said that.

Is there like a list? Is this a bad fit? Yeah, so shout out to Allison. Thank you very much for saying hello and listening to you. The ego boosts and listening. That would last like, I don't know, years for you. Yeah, years, I'm gonna. Keep playing that one.

Yep. I go remember, I'm gonna say my go-workers. Remember when that girl said it was meeting me was like meeting Brad Pitt? I was shocked. It's definitely not like meeting Brad Pitt, but thank you for saying. No, dude, when people have fans at the show,

I think that's awesome. I love meeting everyone. All fans. That's great. Thank you. That is really cool, Mattis. I'm gonna be speaking of meeting fan. I'd love to meet you all. I'm gonna be in New York next week.

It's funny, because when I did the New York event last year, I met a ton of listeners. This is a little bit last minute, but if you're around in New York on June 24th, I'm doing an event with Cosmo Magazine. Oh, what? Yeah, dude, Cosmo Magazine, it's called the next big event. Let's talk about it, because we're talking about sex.

It's June 24th in New York City for a day of real talk, and I'm on a panel with Kelly Osborne, Gretchen Carlson, Cindy Whitehead, Jessica Bennett, myself, some other cool people talking about sex. So I know they're inviting listeners, readers of the magazine, but, some other cool people, talking about sex. So I know they're inviting listeners, readers of the magazine, but you can also buy tickets, which we can put this on our website, perhaps, do I take it? Yes, our follow us on Twitter,

we've been tweeting, or in Twitter, Instagram, Instagram, all of it. So that'll be fun, little week in New York hanging out. New York is such an amazing place. I love it. I would love to go back as soon as possible. Yeah, you don't feel like you've been there very often. Yeah, I went a couple months ago for like four days. It was great. I was all over town.

And it sucks because there was sex with emily listeners like kidding me up on social media and meet up. But I had like this insane schedule that I had zero free time. Like literally get up at five a.m. and then I wasn't done until like 11 o'clock at night. How do we even do that? I don't know. I just try to do as much as I can. I mean, I'd like to get up at 5 a.m. I mean, it sounds really fun.

But we had a great, well, okay, let's go back to us doing the live show we talked about in Vegas this September. And we've had some good feedback. We're like, do that. Do that in September. So if we're going to do it, we have to talk about that. Eventually, make it happen. So it'll set the date. Yeah, so there's a,

I'm gonna be in Las Vegas for the I Heart Radio music festival that happens in September all the time. So, what was the day of that? That, I don't know if that's been disclosed yet. Okay. Just, you guys, we asked you a few months ago, and people did say they would like us to go, you come see us and say hi.

Actually, I can tell you, hold on. Let me look real quick. There's, because not all of it has been announced yet, but what I can tell you is I will be there September 22nd. So we'll... So be there that weekend. Okay.

I'm thinking there has to be a little downtime that we can just record podcasts. Yeah, now or two, hang out with the peeps. That sounds like a good, a really good idea. That'd be awesome. That would be awesome. So I'll try to get the official word real quick. Okay. We'll do that. I love it. We'll lock it down. They'll be awesome. So I'll try to get the official word real quick. Okay.

We'll do that. I love it. Lock it down. They'll be great. Okay, done. We need to travel together. So I've got a little sex in the news, which, you know, when you're coming, we saved some of the stories that you could, and I could uniquely discuss.

And this is 10 types of noises that guys will make during sex. All right. Now, you know that we, in the past, we have talked about the fact that when a guy, like, here's the thing about sex, the goal should not be orgasms. The goal should be pleasure. It's about the journey, not necessarily about the destination though orgasms are nice. We like orgasms. But when you don't know if your partner has orgasm, it's going to orgasm for women to

men, it's a little, like, you came? I didn't know. We'd like to know. But there's ways you can do it that kind of work. And I think it's a case-by-case basis. We're going to go through some of these. But for me, what we've talked about in the past is that when a guy, like, comes and you don't know, and he's like, the guy did, who was like, I liked it. If I blinked, I would have missed that, right? So, you know, and everyone likes to hear differently, like, I know some guys, like, I liked it. If I blinked, I would have missed that, right? So, I never would like to hear it differently. I know some guys, like when you're with a girl and she has an orgasm, if that's happened, I'm sure you.

Okay. Would you like to know, right? I'm coming. What would you like? Are you just telling? Yeah, I would like some verbal communication. Right. Yeah, and probably some noises that'd be good.

Unless, you know, we live in an apartment that's like super thin walls. Like biggest nightmare. Yeah. But with a guy, let me ask you, what the guy, what do you want? I just want to know if you came or not, like because no, I want you to know,

I want some noises to show, like those pleasurable. A pleasurable noise, how do we recognize? So let me run through some of these with you. Like I feel like with women it can be confusing. Because sometimes I'm like, it run through some of these with you. Like, I feel like with women, it can be confusing. Because sometimes I'm like, it was so obvious. I just had orgasm. I'm like, I really want you to come. And I'm like, first of all, that's, okay.

When a guy's like, come from me, maybe come from me. And I know there could be some girls who are like, that might work for them. Like, they didn't 50 shades of gray because everything you saw in there, you know, probably works in real life. That's a joke. But really, there are some women that could turn you on.

So I don't want to like take this away from those women, but I feel like we don't know always if we're going to have an orgasm. And we're trying, too. We would like to. And so when someone's like, come for me, you're doing it, are you coming at it? It could be stressful. But I do feel like it's helpful, you know, to let them know when you do or if you're close. And then so for guys, like, same thing, I feel like since we just don't know, we're like, like, I did a comp, I didn't know. So I feel like I would just like to know. And yeah, maybe some sexy, just some like, you're too crazy. So here's some of the noises guys make. This is familiar to you. So guys make low, almost inaudible mones. For a variety reasons, men aren't as vocal during sex as women. For shy guys, this goes double. The two

pinnacle of a quiet man, enjoying himself, is a very few low-mones in your ear. I mean, okay. Yeah. Then the low-mones are better than like that. Withmic grunts, that's the staple for most guys. Everything on this list is probably the most common. A few deep grunts paired with thrusting.

No, this is maybe uncomfortable. Now, should you have communication about this or she is Now, I just just made me uncomfortable. Now, should you have a communication about this or she just like, I feel like it. I should have a guy say, hey, how do you, how do you want me to respond as a war? I'm so good at asking this. Orgasming me. No.

Because you know what's funny? No, you should not. You brought this up. There's like this famous like how are starting clip that I use this for a porno. And it's like this guy when he's orgasming, he goes, oh yeah, drop in load. Like every time he orgasms, that's the clip,

like every single time. So would you like that? No, drop in load. Yeah, drop in load. No, I wouldn't like that. I wouldn't like that. So now, like, what about if a guy, that's what he did.

So you wish you taught him? I don't think I'd find myself in a situation where I do with a guy who would say drop a guy. Yeah, but you wouldn't know that beforehand. True. I've been sex with him for the first time. True. And then I'd be calling, like, lift and saying time

for you to drop a guy. And then he'd tell him like, hey, baby, like, cut down on the dropping those things. Well, I think you should say. Luckily, I haven't been with, I was with one guy who, it's not that he orgasmed. We were more like, he did this thing where we kept licking my ear, like really deep into my ear, like licking it into like the ear canal. Not saying you had dirty ear, but it's so gross.

No, I was pushing ways like, what? You don't like the licking, and this was like when he was orgasming, it was very bizarre. That was bad. So what I'm saying is, let me tell you something guys, not that you guys the men Need a lot more to be insecure about most you guys are I've had my share of those several men Very rarely I can't even think of any times. I'm like that was awful. So no I'm not saying this is the kind of I just think this is an interesting to talk about and my basic takeaway would be here would be Like you know even the grunting that's the most common thing that's fine

But just if you're super silent and you don't make any noise sometimes it's hard to tell and we don't know if you came or not and I just think that's obviously should be talking about safe sex if you can come inside of the person you know if you're in a committed relationship mate and you both got tested you might not need a condom if you were in a condom since we don't know like we won't know and then you keep here's the awkward moment in sex where you're wearing a condom and the guy comes and you don't know, like, we won't know. And then you keep, here's the awkward moment in sex, where you're wearing a condom, and the guy comes, and you don't know, and then you keep going, and there, it starts to hurt after you, right?

Yeah, the guy's earned. You're like, pain. Yeah. But you keep wanting to go, because you think that I want to come, which I probably do, or maybe I have, but we haven't communicated about it. And I feel like that's what's new lovers, if you will, and if you're with someone for a while, you're kind of like,

well, let me know if you come. So it's kind of like a casual thing, but there's no way to some of the other here's the other noise this is a weird noise He immediately regrets. Have you read a weird noise that you regret? Nothing I can think not during sex. No, no, okay. It'll happen more often guys will like more often They'd like to admit he's doing his best to say quiet and then suddenly a weird yelp escapes his lips like a Hullabah duba duba duba hub Possibly a gleepe. I don't know. How would you say this word a? Hubbly Hubbly Hubbly Hubbly Hubbly

Or they just say have a weird. It's a Hubbly Hubbly They're trying to talk or something. Yeah. No, that's his noise when he comes he goes what is it? He's like Hubbly They're trying to talk or something. Yeah, no, that's his noise when he comes. He goes, what is it? He's like, hubbulu? He's just like, he's just talking gibberish. Right, he obviously fought making the sound. He'll likely pause for a moment to see if you say or do anything and then go right back to it.

Just pretend it didn't happen. I have, I mean, we're sound like, because I have a cramp in my leg. And it sounds like I'm orgasming, you know, because I'm in such pain, but I really just have a cramp in my leg and it sounds like I'm orgasming, you know, because I'm in such pain, but I really just have a cramp in my leg. I have a cramp too from orgasming when you're, when you're tensured like your foot, it's one of my whole leg, it feels like it's gonna break off

in so much pain, yeah. That's probably the loudest you are during sex. You've ever, you ever when you were pain. And then I have to like stop everything and stand up. Yeah, that's sexy. That's how it. Yeah, so's probably the loudest you are during sex. You've ever you ever when you were paying and I have to like stop everything and stand up Yeah, that's sexy. That's how yeah, so hot right? Yeah, okay Let's stop having sex because I have a cramp in my leg. Yeah, you know, she fucked you into cramp well. Yeah, okay So then there's the awkward silence and this is what I'm talking about this one is just Understandably creepy, you know is what this says. I would never use the word creepy

I don't like using the word creepy when defining talking about sex because I feel like we all do our own jams. But yes, blah, blah, blah, men might not be expected to be really vocal during sex, but if he's so weird out the prospect of making noises completely silent. And that's what I'm talking about.

I feel like for men to give you guys a benefit of doubt, most of the orgasm, and you've done masturbation, it's like there's people around, maybe you're masturbating in your house and you've got parents and you're like, I don't wanna, and then you get trained not to make any noise. So when it's silent and you're like, of course I came, I don't even know how that,

because I feel like the natural instinct is that you wanna make noise. So many have to actively suppress that, I think. And I'm saying, just let it go, baby. Whatever your noise is, that's fine. Another thing is yelling, oh yeah, and you like that? You like that? I don't know.

They're like girls don't like that. You know, it's kind of like cheering for like a football team or something. Like, hey, yeah, go for it. You like that. You like that. I don't know. It's kind of like that kind of thing. I don't know.

It's kind of vanilla, but like you want that. Okay. So then I'm coming. 99% of the time, this is what it said when he's orgasming. I'm fine with that. Like I'm gonna come, baby, that's fine. Cause then we know, it's clear. I'm about to do it.

Yeah. We're in embarrassing high pitched squeals. Yeah. I don't even know about this. Like this is purely. Are you like, do you think like, so if a person is doing high pitched squeals, are they're doing the gibberish that they're even aware that they're doing

no no not in the other way they can't control it no I don't think so how they even know that it's an issue or like a pop up. Hey it's not it no here's a thing I'm not even saying you guys see I feel like I'm going to start a whole new wave of thing for guys to obsess about it most this is not a problem just thing you should probably let your partner know some some way of showing pleasure Some weird sound. But if you're doing some high-pitched squeals, I gotta be honest I'm just happy if I'm connected to someone we're intimate and you know just like you could say women who are way too loud or women Who may have sex with this person you're into them hopefully so I don't feel like there's anything

I can really do that's like a horrible thing. He's making the squeal. Having sex with me was so good that you just lost your mind. Had to squeal. I'll just think some people might not even be aware of it. So like in high school, my buddy's mom, I didn't have sex with her. But when we were talk, when we talk, she would do this weird thing and she was not aware of, I go, hey, how you doing today? And she goes, oh, how you doing? Everything, like, oh, how's your day? Like, where'd you guys go? Oh, do you guys go to Arby's?

Yeah. Mm-hmm. Like after every sentence, it'll be, mm-hmm. Probably a nervous thing. Yeah. It drove me crazy, because I do it like right away. What is that? Do you know what? But it it's funny because my buddy, he

wasn't, he didn't pick up on it until I said it and then he heard it like every single time she talked. Now we can't go home anymore. Yeah. Because the worst thing. That's how you're doing it. So I'm thinking like, you know, when the people are doing these high pitch squeals and stuff like that, they might not be aware of it. So maybe, I know, when the people are doing these high pitch squeals and stuff like that, they might not be aware of it. So maybe, I mean, if the partner's bothered by it, then of course, like, say something, hey, did you notice that you squeal like a pig

or you say like some weird gibberish or like, how do you even approach that? I think you should say when we're having sex. I just wear earplugs. God, I want to know that this is what I would say. I would say when we're having sex and it's so hot, and I love having sex with you, I'm just not sure when you come.

I can't tell when you're, I want to make sure that you're getting the two. So I love and you like, let me know you're coming. Would those high-pitched squeals amount the same thing? No, I don't know. I mean, I probably, I wouldn't shame a man from making high-pitched squeals, but I would,

I would, I don't know, I mean, if it was every time, I think I would be cool with it, really, unless it was like jarring and I just lost my boner, which doesn't usually happen. How about like, I just put an app on my phone and I hit a button on there and then like, all the lights turn on, because that's possible. I have that set up in my room.

What would you have orgasm in your lights? No, but that would be a funny thing that you did You described your phone and then you like fire workers Yeah, that Like like like any years. Yeah, that would be cool. Yeah, totally Goes back to communication just communicate about when it's happening. Okay, let's get into some I'm emails here, man. Okay one, give a shout to our sponsors. We love you all, we love our sponsors.

I'm glad you guys get to know each other. Thank you for supporting them, and we will be right back with emails. Okay, Matt, I guess what you didn't know. All right. We're doing emails per usual, but now people can text, ask Emily, all one word to 797979 with their question. What?

That's awesome. All you do is you, one word, ask Emily, ASKEMILY279779, and you get that same form that you get when you're on the website, and just fill it out and send it in. That's awesome. I know. it's great. And then it's sax with Emily dot com. Click on the Ask Emily tab. You can also leave me a voice. People are like sexting with you, right? Yeah, totally. That's pretty cool. It is cool. Menace. Look at you guys getting all tech with it. You're on Spotify now. You got like texting. I'm all over Snapchat. I love answering P. I actually am spending a lot of time because I can't like it night. I'm all over Snapchat. I'm all over Snapchat. I'm all over Snapchat. You're all on the Snapchat. I love answering P. I actually am spending a lot of time

because I can't like it night and I'm going to sleep and you get all those, do you answer people back? Yeah, as many as I can. Yeah, I like it. I mean, I have a lot of things on here that I'm like, oh, I gotta get back to where they send questions but you guys, if there are longer questions, you should just email to me, but it's a good time

talking to people. Okay, when you email us, please include your gender, your age where you live and how you listen to the show. Okay. Hi, Emily, I have a question regarding gasp, my penis. Yep, I know, another dude emailing Emily, wanting to talk about his junk and his insecurities with it. What is it with us men obsessing over our penises anyway?

Well, I suppose I'll just come right out and say it, I have a curved penis. All right. I'm happy to report that everything downstairs functions as intended, but my first girlfriend from high school was very put off by my shape. Unsurprisingly, this was the source of my anxiety, which has festered inside me over the years.

Thankfully, I'm going to accept my deformity because Mr. Banana is all I've got. As I matured, I came to realize that hating my penis for the rest of my life is just wasted energy. With that said, I'm still insecure enough about it to have never told anybody about my penis except for my sexual partners. Obviously, my question is this. How common are curved penises?

Another question? Have you ever slept with a man with a deformed penis? Was the sex pleasurable? Does the direction or degree of the bend matter at all? I only recently discovered your podcast about two weeks ago, and I'm addicted. Love the show. I would be absolutely ecstatic to hear what you have to say on the topic. Thank you, Brad, 30 Kansas City.

That's very interesting. I've always wondered that like for a female. Okay. No, is that more pleasurable? Yes. This is what I want to say first. When this came in Brad, I was actually sitting here with Jamie. We did a little thing on Snapchat, which that's the only thing about Snapchat is it's gone.

We're like, here's these emails we get. You got to save them. For people, I know, I have them all saved on my phone. I can re-release it during the show, but this guy was like, I have a curvy penis. And I get it, I get it, Brad, you but this guy was like, I have a curvy penis, you know, and I get it, I mean, I get it, Brad, your 30, you know, your first experience was with a girl in school

and she said it was bad. We're gonna take away your language here, because you're calling your penis deformed, and it makes me cringe, because really, there is nothing wrong with your penis, Brad, like zero. In fact, I think like a bendy penis is actually good luck. I get that you're stressed, I get that a woman made fun of it because it doesn't look like everyone else's.

But having a bendy penis is like, it can hit spots that straight forwarded penises cannot hit, just like the color and the shape and the sizes of men's penis are different. Some bend left, some bend right, some bend up, some bend, there's not like a perfect way for it to bend. But when I say bendy penis, and think about, I think, hello G-spot.

Yeah. I think hello, all these other spots in our vagina that are in our VOLVA that don't get hit normally that don't get touched and it's not a bad thing at all The only issue is if it's a bend if your penis is bent so much That you have pain or it's super curved when you have a direction that's called pironies When a man's penis is super super curved And when it's erect and it typically hits men over 40, and that means you have difficulty paying having sex,

but it just sounds like this is in your head, Brad. So I'm saying, penis is curved, penis is super super common. I've never heard a woman complain about it. Me neither. Ever? In fact, I think it's unique, like how we say, you know, like, yeah, I just think that, you know. You can pick your penis out of a line up. When we say, you know, like, yeah, I just think that you know You can pick your penis out of a lineup when somebody was you know when they were younger

They would be afraid of buy it because it's something that they've never seen before right but as they you know People get older that they would be more interested in it You know, I think so too So I feel like this is a great example of getting some information from somebody that makes you feel bad about yourself when you're in your Formative years you're in high, and you think forever you have to like hide your bendy penis. And I'm telling you, you go for it, you're fine, Brad, and you're lucky. I actually think it's good luck, bendy penis, because for different women, it'll hit different

places. I think it's awesome. Nothing worry about totally normal. How about that? Hays is normal, but it's common. I think you should just put it out there right away, said, when you meet somebody, I have a bent penis. Like, he should put his dating profiles like a plus. Yes. No, it, dude, I'm telling you, I think that women would be interested in checking it out and

see what it's all about. Like, the circus, checking it out. No, but I'm saying you put it out there right away and don't be afraid of it. And then I, it's already out of the way and it's something that you don't have to be shy about. And the woman already knows, I guarantee there'll be women that be afraid of it. And then, I hate it's already out of the way, and it's something that you don't have to be shy about. And the woman already knows, I guarantee there'll be women that'd be interested

in just like checking out and taking a ride for the first time. You know? I want to correct this thing that I said, you should not put that on your dating profile. No, no, no, no, no, that was a joke. But I'm saying, I'm saying, I'm saying, I'm saying,

a discussion about it. I don't know, okay, here's, this is interesting. I don't think, I think if you discussed it beforehand, it's like guys who email us with uncircised penis, they want to know what's the protocol. And I kind of feel like you don't really have to discuss it. I feel like the more confident you are rocking your penis, you're with 30. I'm sure you're with the women who've actually had some partners before that it's not like you have to be like, listen, we need to talk to you unless they bring it up.

You're like, watch it rock your world. Yeah, I think that's awesome. That's what I'm trying to say. Like, have an open discussion about it. Exactly. That's all. Okay. you talk to, unless they bring it up, you're like, watch it, rock your world. Yeah, I think that's awesome. That's what I'm trying to say.

Like, have an open discussion about it. Exactly. That's all. Hey, Emily, I know you've probably get asked this question all the time. I don't know if I should buy a masterbater. I feel confused about if it's right or wrong to want one. Also, I live with my parents still.

How should I go about buying one and using one given my living situation? Thank you, August 18, Georgia. So it's's a guy August. Hi, you're living in Georgia with your parents. Yeah, buy a masturbator by a flashlight by the flesh like go. I think would be a great male masturbation sleeve Go it's a go because it's smaller more compact. I'm not even aware of the girl. So it's a so many of them. Yeah It's compact on the website travel size. Oh, okay. There's so many of them. Yeah, it's compact. It's travel size travel size. Oh, okay. It's more compact.

It doesn't look. It's, you know, a lot of the flesh sites, I feel like we even talked about flesh in a while. No. The male masturbation sleeve that's that looks and feels like the real deal. It's made of patented skin material that was invented by NASA. Sweet. And it's pretty cool.

And I feel like, I mean, you're living at home. You can easily wash it out You would jack it inside of it. It's like guys have their hands, but you know, why not try something else? So get some loot with it and buy some joe lube you can get it on our website and Obviously, I think Just wash it out. It looks like it literally looks like a flashlight like they won't your mom probably won't know what's inside of it But she probably shouldn't be rooting around your bedroom anyway. And you're saying should you buy one? Like I don't see why not, I don't see a downside to it. In fact, I love that you're asking that,

because a lot of guys like, I don't see why I need it. I've got my hand. I'm just saying to different sensation. You haven't, have you used one yet? No. I think it's time like 16 years into your relationship. Yeah. To use a flashlight. So a lot of the flashlights are so women porn stars actually model them after that like they put the the mold in their vagina. You can actually go to like AVN like the in Vegas, the porn conference and you can actually watch women molding the their vagina's a person. You can watch it. Yeah, no way. They got the mold inside their vagina and then you could buy. But yeah, that's one kind So if there's a porn star that you're really into you may go it's like having sex with there or you can get one

That doesn't look like a vagina, but it's got the whole picture penis. Nice. Yeah, okay How about that? We solve that Emily? I haven't heard you discuss voyeurism lately I want to know how women feel about it and if it's an acceptable practice I'm not really focused on watching a partner have sex with other people, but watching a partner have sex with themselves or giving me oral or even watching ourselves having sex during sex, like a closed circuit video. We live in a generation of appeal-based relationships and I would think voyeurism is more predominant now than any other time in life. I swipe based on voyeuristic mentalities and it doesn't seem like something that's discussed and accepted much at all. PSU are so

beautiful and so awesome. Thank you so much shy boy over 33 Indianapolis. Is there an app for that yet? Well okay. I know there's one for three sums. Well I swipe based on voyeuristic mentalities so I don't know that someone in their Tinder boy profile is gonna be like I want to you know I love being watched I don't know how you can tell that in their dating profile on voyeuristic mentalities. So I don't know that someone in their Tinder profile is going to be like, I want to, you know, I love being watched. I don't know how you can tell that in their dating profile. So voyeurism, how it's typically used is when people are having sex and they like to be watched, you know, or they like to watch other people, and they, you know, think they

get off on that. But really what you're talking about shy boy, is that you just want more visual stimulation during sex, that you think it would be super hot if you are watching her give you oral sex or you're making a sex tape together. And I feel like that's really a mutual masturbation. I think that's a totally acceptable practice and I think that makes sense. I think you're putting a mirror in the bedroom

and watching each other. I feel like maybe I haven't talked about that a lot lately, but I do. No, but I know you've been campaigning that for years, but I don't believe you have the mutual masturbation. Oh yeah, or I believe you haven't brought it up in a while and you get new listeners all the time. That's true.

I feel like mutual masturbation is the ultimate voyistic, voyeuristic act that you can, you know, you're watching her, she's watching you. And first of all, you're learning actually how she touched herself, how you touch yourself. And then, who knows, maybe you'll start touching, she'll start, you'll put your hand over her hand. It's like a learning tool, plus it's really hot.

But I feel like for, I don't know, again, how you're swiping at it, but I think that this is something that can turn both men and women on. And typically I hear it from men, just because not that we aren't all visual, but men are like, I want to see it. It's hot. Let's leave the lights on. Let I hear it from men just because not that we aren't all visual but men are like I want to see it. It's hot. Like let's leave the lights on. Let's check it all out.

So I mean, are you just close your eyes during sex? What do you do, men? No, I don't do that. But I think that would be a totally different thing than, you know, keeping your eyes open during sex. No, but it's hot to watch. That's why I say also like when you're performing oral sex, I always tell women this, like if you're going down on a guy,

you want to make eye contact, you want it not too creepy, don't worry, not the whole time. Not staring. Don't stare into their eyes, like bugger that time, but like move in ways that where you feel sexy and you fahot and just, you know, it's a fun thing, sex can be a hot thing to watch when you're doing it and to be watching.

So I think this is really common. I think you need to worry, it's a fun thing. Sexes can be a hot thing to watch and when you're doing it and to be watching. So I think this is really common. I think you need to worry that it's something that's weird and like a term women off, shy boy or just initiate it. But somebody needs to make that app so people can meet up, you know? Like I like watching. Yeah, yeah.

I'm sure, I mean, we've heard about that forever about the husband and the closet watching, you know, all kinds of stuff. Yeah, that's true. He's not really talking about wanting to watch the outside, but that's a whole other thing. There are apps like that though, but I mean there could be different sections. Totally. Okay, so, um, Hey, Emily, I've recently started to try dating sites. I'm interested in finding a friends with benefits relationship. I'm on several sites including match, Ashley Madison, and even adult friendfinder. of its relationship. I'm on several sites including Match, Ashley Madison, and even Adult Friend Finder.

Most of these are a joke, with 90% of the members being bots or scams to get you to join other sites. I've tried everything. I've tried being subtle. I've tried being overt. Women get scared away thinking I'm only about the sex. I've tried down the middle, where I've friendly-like conversations and eventually ask if we can meet IRL.

In real life. That's when they go. Nothing seems to be working. Why are women so obscure on dating sites about what they're looking for? They claim to want FWB, but they get scared away as soon as the conversation heads in that direction. Why don't women just say what they want or don't want? I totally agree with menists.

Men don't pick up on signals. I understand that many of these women are just interested in someone paying attention to them, but as soon as Mars required the ghost, why the games, any suggestions, how to successfully find an FWB situation, first rated Jeff, 50 Missouri. Missouri, what's up to Missouri?

What's up to Missouri? I'm on the radio Missouri. You are? St. Louis, 104.9. Okay, up to Missouri. I mean, on the radio, Missouri. You are? St. Louis, 104.9. Okay. Yeah, Jeff, get your menace 6 daily. Yeah. In the morning, 6 to 10 a.m.

Wow. That's so cool. St. Louis, Missouri. But the thing is, I don't know, I guess it's just the power and numbers, you know, because sometimes a lot of people just get on these dating sites and they like the attention. They're not really going to like follow through with it, but they like having the conversation. You know what I'm saying? I mean, if you watch TV shows like Catfish and stuff like that, they're getting on there

because they like the attention at the actual conversation, but they don't really want to like follow through all the way. Definitely there's a large portion that do want to follow through all the way. Definitely there's a large portion that do wanna follow through all the way. So there must be some part of the conversation that's not clicking. Well, I think I figured it out. Okay, tell me. So okay, this is what I think the problem is here.

Jeff, I think that you're pushing the conversation too early. Here's the thing, sure, we want attention and we might even want to find the benefits situation, but if you're pushing it too early, this's the thing, sure, we want attention, and we might even want a friendship benefits situation, but if you're pushing it too early, this is where it's tricky. Yeah, I like you, you're, let's just have a friends

with benefits situation. Yeah, I see, I want to feel, that's insane. It's an easy decision the first day, it's an important for 10 minutes. It just, we want to feel desired and hot, and we might want that as well.

We might want a casual relationship, but there's like, we still want to feel like it's not just a transactional. Like you're not just looking to have sex. You're like, you'll do for that friends with benefit thing. If you're saying it before meeting them, or she might just think like you're done, even you don't even want to get to know her at all.

Like you just want the sex. And while yes, that's what casual sex is about, there is still some kind of finessing with women and maybe men don't need the attention as much although I think some do. But you gotta actually be in turn. I mean, we're talking about friends with benefits so you do wanna get to know her.

So I would say maybe you're leading with it too quickly. Like if you're matching with someone on Tinder and you're like, okay, I'm looking for an FWB, she'll be like, okay, so you just saw me, you thought I was hot and you just wanna bang me and grunt. Yeah, maybe you gotta lay a little more brown work. Softly. Right. He's got to lick.

So I don't think that, Jeff, I think that's what it is. I think you're tactic, and this isn't like you're being dishonest. You just, it's about when you release this information, when you let them know your intentions and what you're looking for. Because, and you never know, because maybe you'll want something more after you meet someone who's great. You know, we just don't want to feel like a piece of meat, even if you think we're a piece of meat.

Okay, that's what we got time for. Oh, well, it was great being back here with you. I know. I enjoy our time together as always. And thank you to all the listeners that support Sex with Emily. And it's fun meeting you out and about. So never be shy to say hello. Answer review the show.

And review the show. You get everyone to do it. That's my favorite thing. All right, so the show is entirely for free. Emily puts a lot of effort into it. She has a whole staff here together. They put a lot of time in doing the show. All we ask, wherever you listen to the show,

be it iTunes, Spotify, sexamma.com, soundcloud, wherever the show is, all you got to do is rate and review. Now, it doesn't hurt my feelings if you don't give it five stars, but you definitely will get hurt Emily's feelings if you don't put five stars. And if you can leave a couple of comments, it's great. I believe that I'm pretty. That just helps spread the word about the show so if you can do that it's greatly appreciate it and

subscribing to it and commenting helps commenting follow sucks Emily on Instagram I put up a kitty shot just for you oh you did yeah I was in Mexico okay and I did that and then someone commented men is is gonna be happy that you did that yes so if you guys listen to the show, you can comment on it as well. Okay, so if you listen to the entire show, what I want you to do is go to Instagram.com, slash sex at Emily or at sex at Emily on Instagram. Comment and say that you listen to the show.

Look for the bikini pick. Yep, that's it. It should be recent. Thanks Menace and you can find Menace at Menace. At Menace on Instagram, Twitter, also do a Morning Show called The Woody Show. We do a podcast, it's not about sex, but if you want to keep up on pop culture and the news and maybe be offended here and there, search The Woody Show and download the podcast.

Awesome. Thank you, Menace. I love it. Okay. Thank you, Menace. Thank you to my amazing team, Ken, producer, Lark, Jamie, Michael. I love you all. And thank you everyone for listening.

Was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithamlee.com.