Sex With Emily - SWE: Breaking up & Moving On

Episode Date: August 2, 2012

Emily may have just dressed up five nights in a row for Halloween and Menace was nominated to be a Prom King, but don't worry, today's show is all about grown up topics. A rather young listener has trouble leaving a relationship and entering a new one, so Emily has some advice on how to break up. Menace starts a 30 day Starbucks challenge to "see what happens," so he might not be the best source of advice for making mature decisions. Luckily Emily is around to help some married listeners maintain their healthy sex life into their golden years. Ejaculation etiquette, oral sex, and orgasm issues with a girlfriend get discussed, and a listener has a hairy problem with his girlfriend. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode of Sex with Emily is brought to you by your friends at Jimmy Jane. They do vibrators like no one else does. They're sleek and powerful, and their massage candles are amazing. Plus, we've got an incredible offer going with Jimmy Jane, so if you want to treat yourself or someone you love, and you like hearing Sex with Emily for free, go to jimmyjane.com and use coupon code Spring for $25 off premium vibrators and other amazing products when you spend over $100. Thanks for listening, I promise you're sex life will improve.

Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Betrubized they call them in a fight on day Hey, Avaline, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute The girls got to understand, oh my The women know about shrinkage

Isn't it common, but only? What do you mean like laundry? It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I want to feel so grown Being bad feels pretty good. But you know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily.

We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between. For more information about sex with Emily, go to sexwithemily.com where you can listen to our podcast, send it to our mailing list and our RSS feed. So thanks everyone for listening to this show. You can find me on Facebook, my fan page is sex with Emily and on Twitter, Emily Morse, M-O-R-S-E and I'm here with Menace. Hello, how are you? I'm good, how are you?

I'm good. How can we find you? Just whitemenace.com. how are you? I'm good, how are you? I'm good. How can we find you? Just whitemenace.com. That's so easy. Everything's there. It's so easy. And we're also always looking for advertisers.

So if you're interested in advertising for the show, if you know any great products that you know, my listeners would like, email me, feedbackatsexwithemily.com. So today's show will be reading your emails that you sent to feedbackatsexwithemily.com. Topics include moving from one relationship to the next, where to ejaculate, the girlfriend's not into oral sex and great sex after marriage, plus sex in the news and a surprising new study

that says you should wait to have sex. Really? How about that? We got an action cat. This is our 40-vi now. This is our 45-minute show as you know We're doing more shows and we've got 15-minute shows our little quickies and this is our longer Luster is show love it speaking about sex and stuff like that. Yes as we do

You're on Twitter. You need to follow oh my god sex facts. Okay. Yeah, cuz there's good stuff Oh, okay, we keep great. Oh my god sex facts. I'm gonna write that down right now Oh my god. They'll be interesting stuff that you like you should forward it to me I love it. Okay, speaking of social networking today someone posted on my Facebook page and they said I Don't believe that you and men is really love each other because you say you do But then you never hang out so that means that you don't like each other We try to hang out kind of. No, no, no.

We do love each other. We're just busy. We're like so busy. Look, I invited you to my birthday party. You didn't show up. I know. I'm forever. So you know what?

I extended the whole of it. I feel well that night. I know, but that doesn't count. Because you invited 600 people to your birthday party. Yeah, but I'm just saying you were. I understand. So life, this was an amazing week. Halloween and San Francisco, if you don't know this, Halloween and San Francisco is a national holiday. People here freak out the whole town is dressed up. I so wish the Giants game last night was in the stadium.

Sunday night was insane because everyone would have been dressed up because people get dressed up here for five days. I went out, oh, Giants San Francisco Giants are world series champions and I hear in our home And it went crazy last night. It was crazy. There was cops everywhere But I was driving up my friend's house. It was insane. My friends got arrested for the truck in public. Yeah, oh your friends. That's a shock my buddies your friends are there. My friends who are very wealthy, multi-millionaires being dumbasses and they got arrested. That is hilarious. So they're not like they're they're in jail right now. They got out there. They're there for a couple hours. Yeah. Yeah. So we're up. Yeah. I've never been arrested. Thank God. So anyway, Halloween, I went out

five nights in a row in costume this week. I'm exhausted. Yes. Did you get a separate one for you? I dressed up. No, I kind of doubled up and changed it up. And kind of one night I was a princess. And then I was queen mightest, like king mightest. Everything you touched just turns to gold, but I was queen mightest.

So there's some pictures on my Facebook page. So I was wearing gold dress and all gold. And then I was kind of like a butterfly the other night, but I was really just wearing kind of a slurry outfit. It was like a butterfly top. It was sequins and pretty. And I had the best time I was out to like 6 a.m. on Saturday night. It was crazy, man. I was going off. I went to the Burning Man party, which is like this crazy festival in the city and what's outside the city. It was fun. That's amazing. I feel so energized. I did not make out with anybody. I was like

thinking about this. Who do you have? I did not make out with anybody. I was like, thank you for having sex with me. I was like, thank you for having sex with me. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody.

I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody.

I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. I did not have sex with anybody. coming to visit me this weekend. Really? Yeah, that guy. Where are you importing this guy from? LA. LA again? Yeah, but I have my other friend in town, my best friends in town.

So I feel like I should hang out with her, but he's coming and blah, blah, blah. Oh, no. So that's it. And then, okay. So it's a rose before hose. But see, it's hose before brose for me. Yeah.

I'm really into my, well, my friends are hoes. I know that. We've discussed that. I'm weighing to my girlfriends. And she's my best friend. She's in town for a few weeks. And I'm really wanted to well, I know I know that we've discussed I'm way into my girlfriends And she's my best friend. She's in town for a few weeks And I'm really wanted to hang out with her this weekend. So anyway, he's supposed to come but we'll see oh God, I hope it doesn't listen. Oh, he's coming. I'm so excited So and also I have good news, which you know

But I wanted to share with people is that I got the Bravo TV show. No, that's amazing I know so they're gonna be shooting a TV pilot in the next two months before Christmas, they say, but I don't know, these things go. And it's called Misadvised, and it's a dating show where they're falling to other relations. They're falling three total dating

in relationship with experts in their life, and to see how we date and do we follow our own advice that we're experts, do we really know what we're doing? Which is scary. I won't give away the ending. Exactly. What is the ending? The ending is that Emily is, I don't know what, but it's funny. So that's so it's a pilot and I'm sure you'll be in it, because I'm sure they'll be shooting us. They were asking tons of questions about how we record and we are in a studio, we're in a major studio and we do the... Multi-million dollar building.

We're not in a closet. We are not in a closet anymore. We're not in the closet or in a closet. Unless you're in the closet. I don't think you're gay. No, you're not. Yeah, so what's new with you? I've seen you. I know. I know what happened.

Oh, today I got nominated for Prom King for social media prom put on by Funny or Die. Oh, really? Yeah, so that's amazing. Funier Die is a great site. Yeah, so please vote for me, because they're having a prom in the city. And so I'm in San Francisco.

In San Francisco. And I got nominated for Prom King. I want you to win. How many people vote for you? Just go to socialmediaprom.com. And it says white menace. Yeah, and you can vote for me. I'm so

voting for you can I vote you for you 15 times I guess I don't know how is there prom queen there's prom queen and that funny thing is because I do another radio show where like everyone like makes fun of each other right they had so many votes that I got voted for prom queen also. Prom Queen? Yeah, so I'm like on every single one. That is so funny. When's the deadline for voting? November 11th. Okay, so go to socialmediaprom.com.

Okay, I'm gonna vote for you. I'll post it on my Facebook page too, if you want. Cool. I'll promote you. Thank you. And I started one other little side blog. Okay. Because you know we've been talking about

how I've been drinking and partying and all that stuff. I want to get in shape. Right. Well this is very odd. And I know a lot of people do 30 day challenges because we talk about this 30 day. For sex challenge. Yeah.

Sex challenge and there's 30 day challenge. The guy eats McDonald's and all that stuff. And well I'm not going to drink anymore. Tom March because that's when I'm going to South by Southwest. Starting right? I've already started that. I'm not drinking anymore. Okay.

And I don't really have too many food options because I work so much. Right. The only thing that's buying me is two burger places and a Starbucks. And nothing buy my house because I live in the middle of nowhere. Okay. And all I have is Starbucks on the way home

So I'm gonna challenge myself to eat Starbucks for 30 days You can eat like there's sandwiches and there's sandwiches and all their stuff for 30 day straight Wow see what happens. It's you gonna have coffee too every time you know, you don't know big coffee They have good sandwiches sometimes. I mean, I would kind of venture out and try to make sure you get some vegetables. Yeah, no they have vegetables, fruits, everything there. Honey, you could also go to the most supermarket and you could get some food for your home. But see, I don't have time. Oh, once I get home, you and I are so this is why we are hanging out because we're both so busy. So, I made a little side blog to see how it goes and it's called living off Starbucks calm

Living off Starbucks calm. Yeah, so check it out if you guys want to have some fun. Okay, but I see how it goes So how many days are we on now? I just started it today So would you have today like one of those chocolate donuts? No, I had one of their low fat sandwiches I love the low fat sandwiches and I had a banana and some water. Okay, are you starving right now and you want to go to one? I'm not even starving. Oh, that's good. You look good. You look, you look, you look, you look, you look, you look, you look, you look cute.

No. Your hair looks good. I got a haircut, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You look great. I'm trying to clean up my act. Are you? For 30 days. For 30 days. Good luck. I should do that too. I should do something for 30 days. Yeah. What should I do? I should have sex every day for 30 days. For 30 days. Good luck. I should do that too. I should do something for 30 days. Yeah. What should I do? Maybe I have sex.

I should have sex every day for 30 days. I know. Isn't it ironic? Yeah. Sex with Emily is not having sex. But I have come to realize that there is a certain now that I'm, I have the show I've had it for a while now, five years. But I do think there is this thing with men when they meet me, which I never, I know this

might be obvious to many, but for me, I thought, I'm not just sexed, Emily. I'm Emily, I'm not everything, but there is a thing, like when people try to fix me up, they're like, okay, she has a sex show, but she's not. Crazy sex girl, she's still really cool. Like guys are soome that I'm, that you're a dominant trick. Yeah, exactly, they do, or that I'm like a whore.

Yeah. And. Well, yeah, they probably think like, since you have this extra show, you're very... Forward, aggressive... Forward, be aggressive and all this stuff and then they go, wait a minute. Wait a minute, she's... Or they're probably overly aggressive with you, too. Right, or they are...

Some people say they're intimidated. Actually, one guy did say that to me. So, I've just... that's been a new thing because people always ask me that's the first question they ask. They say, how do you guys act when they date you that's number one number two what do your parents think about the show my parents are cool and the guys lately I was like oh they're fine but then lately I've been hearing more that they're whatever what can I do it's my life it's my career and this is my career for the rest of my life I mean can't help it. You

don't you're gonna find a medium someday. medium. Yeah, like a medium not too aggressive not. Oh, you mean sexually. Yeah. Oh, like a balance. Yeah Balance. Oh, yeah, the elusive balance You're not a medium who like you know tells the future or anything like that right exactly I hope that I do one day. No, I do I feel like I'm I mean way I feel more myself than I've ever felt before very Comfortable with wear a mat and the decisions I've been making. Like, sex school was so fun. It's done now till February and like, that was an amazing experience and all that stuff.

So I feel like I'm on a good path. Yeah. I cry. Then you have any juicy stories about people they've heard, like things going on? With my friends instead. Juicy stories. Just friends who are psychotic about stalking guys

on Facebook. I mean, literally, I've had so many conversations with people where they're like, well, I went to Facebook page and I did this, I did that, and then they blocked them from seeing some of their pictures. I mean, Facebook conversations come up all the time with dating because, like, well, I responded to him

and he didn't respond to me, and then I saw he was out, but he said he wasn't out. That's just what keeps coming up. But nothing crazy, Juicy. It's amazing. But it's really changed the way we date. I mean, it's amazing me, like I finally, these two guys that I was dating,

I became friends with them on Facebook finally, because I think that's another, that's another sort of trend now or behavior. I think when people start dating, they don't become friends on Facebook right away. I think because it reveals so much, but then eventually you do, so these guys that I was dating. We finally became friends on Facebook and they're like all over my Facebook page. Like, so who's this? Who's that?

And I just think yeah, years ago, you just didn't have it. Now they know all my friends. They knew that I wasn't a Halloween. What I did where I went. Like, it's hard to have a conversation because they already know. Oh, yeah, I read that on your Facebook. I read this. They're like, oh, so do this. My ex boyfriend calls me all the time. He's like, who are you in that picture with? Oh my god. Oh, I know.

He still stops. I'm not. I know. This is the thing. So, Facebook, I can't decide if it's good or bad. I still haven't seen the movie yet. I think it's bad. Did you see the movie?

I see the movie. What's it called? The social network. I really want to see it. It's good. You start without me? Yes. I don't want to bring that up again.

No, what we don't like each other. What we don't hang out because another thing is I use have a different schedule and I work every single night. Now I have a new schedule, I have nights free. Feel free to ask me to go hang out. OK, I'm just saying. I'm going out there. I've got nights free too next week. I'm totally free.

OK. OK, we're going to go to see a movie or something. All right. Because we can't drink. Yeah, we're going to the movie. That's kind of a bummer that I'm going to go out when you can't drink. Why?

Just because I thought it'd be fun to get wasted with you one time. Yeah, well, there's other things. Okay, we'll wait 30 days. That sounds good. Okay, let's move into some sex in the news. The first thing I gotta say, and this show's actually gonna air after this day, but there is a sex toy day that's coming out, and I'm a sponsor of it. It's November 4, 2010, and you go to sextoyday..com and they're giving away a thousand

Vibrators, however, they're gonna have a special They've already gotten like 2000 people signing up for them like that doesn't mean they get them But they put their email address in but they're gonna put aside a separate arsenal for sex with Emily listeners Really so email me feedback at sex with Emily.com. Why you think you deserve the sex toy? It's on November 4th. I don't believe this is gonna air before then probably november fifth this is gonna air so anyway uh... yeah i was just mentioned last week but that's for my life so uh... sex toy dates with my pleasure dot com and myself and we are sponsoring it i'm gonna be tweeting it now that's not okay good it's on my list of things to do

i like it tonight okay sex the news who's got the spookiest celeb sex life? The finals. Ready? Okay. Okay. John Travolta and Kelly Preston. We aren't the only ones who think this two-some sex life is Saturday night nauseating. Look who's talking. Travolta between the hair and the Scientology and the rumors is half of it's true, well, it's a little creepy. Other commenters chained in, Travolta hands and pants down,

and Travolta is Revolta. Have you heard all this stuff lately that he's been cheating on her with men and she's pregnant? She's like 50 and pregnant. To be honest with you, I, not even before it was in the tabloids, I've been hearing about that. Me too, for years.

Like 10 years. But it's almost like, I have a friend who's like, if you've heard it's a rumor, it's trail. There's a friend of mine like, he used to always read Star Magazine, let's be serious about it. He was like, if you read it in the magazine, it's trail. So I don't know, I'm with that.

That rumor about John Travelled has been going around forever. So he's top, he and John Travelled and Kelly Preston, next is iced tea and cocoa. What? Coco may have curves for days, and iced tea may have the stroke, barf, but no one seems to want to see these two get down,

like, well, themselves. Coco and Ice-T are disgusting, really. He acts like her pimping. She's a classic stupid blonde girl. Don't even know how to coordinate a sentence and hyperventilates after speaking 10 words. Okay. And Cody Brown and the sister wives. Have you seen the sister wives show? Everyone's talking about the sister wives. No, I'm all about the desperate housewives from Atlanta and Beverly Hills. That's Unbravo. Yeah. You watch them?

Oh my God, religiously. See, this is bravo. We're so excited, but that's going to be us. Yes. Okay, so it's the biggest reality show swooping the airways right now and the grossest reality coupling we can think of, yes, including the Jersey Shore Gang. As accepting as a hand-bottled alternative lifestyle, that gives me the willies. Also, would it kill someone in that group to be attractive?

Why is it all the people you see engaged in this stuff aren't the people you want to see engaged in this stuff? Dammit Janet, you're right. Next, last is Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon. Sure, the devilish is broad, and her boyish husband have a baby on the way, but that doesn't make their bedroom behavior any less painful and awful to think about.

One comment is you're kept it short and simple, and we think it's said it best. Mariah Nick are the most gag-tastic. So those are five finalists. Who said that? This is something that I found on the interwav. Wow. Yes. Okay, so I like Nick Cannon. I'm like a saving bad thing about him. Really? I don't know him. And I love Mariah so sorry you love Mariah Carey. Yeah really like love her how like you Appreciate her very talented. She's talented singer. Yeah, but she's a little like crazy. I don't know I don't know personally Crazy if you get the celebrity thing all my friends are like, oh, what's gonna happen if something and I think I'm always normal Not that I'm gonna be celebrity, but like whatever, you know, I think that you that a lot of times people put this on celebrities

Like they make them Become crazy because there's so much tension that's given to them and then it just sort of propels them into this crazy land No, Britney Spears crazy, but she's in a good place now I read that I was getting my nails on the other day and that's reading star magazine Yeah, and they said she's in a really good place. She's taking her meds. She's not freaking out. She's not breaking windshields Really, yeah, that's not breaking windshields. Really? Yeah. That's, I don't know, I thought I heard something recently.

No, that was Lindsey Lohan who's like filtered drug test six times. How do I know the stuff? I don't know. Everyone knows it. That's weird that you know this because I don't, I didn't know for you to keep up on pop culture. I got my nails done for Halloween, which I'm not a big nail, get nail done girl, but I was love it because I get to read all the magazines And so I just found out all this information about the gossip and the low-hand Who's having sex, who? I don't remember

The sex is going on. There hasn't been any really sick. No, but there's a lot of divorces There's like a lot of couple that corny cox is breaking up with so and so. Yeah. David or cat. Yeah. You know it's so funny about Courtney Cox is that you know this. I think that I get all the time. Like you step in daily, people are like, you look like Courtney Cox. You have Courtney Cox. Well, when friends was on, all my friends were like, not only do you look like her Emily,

but you act like my physical man. There's some sort of like her. And now there's a show Cougar Town that's been out for a while. Two of my friends called me last week for some reason they were watching it and they're like it is on canny the way you look like her and act like her. Maybe she listens to the podcast. Do you think she does and she's copying me? Yeah, probably.

Yeah, so she's getting divorced because apparently her husband, our cat, whatever his first name is, he decided that he cheated on her. And then he decided to get it off his chest that he should talk to Howard Stern. So then he ran on the Howard Stern show and was like, yeah, I stepped up with this woman once and did something happen. So that's what he said. And she dumped his ass.

Yeah, I'm actually should. But who's decides to let it all out to have with Howard Stern? Because Howard Stern can get a lot of stuff. Yeah, but why would our cat wanna be like, oh, I really wanna talk about my sexual exploits. I don't know, anyway, it's funny. It's good for the current. Cause they would our cat, he's crazy.

I don't know, he has this crazy show that he's putting on with midget strippers and stuff like that, or little people strippers, sorry. I'm midget sort of done now. Like everyone had shows with midgets and now they're like, no, I don't know, but I think it's a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little bit more like a little Wow, that could be an interesting show. Seven eight. Tall. Yeah. Yeah. Are we even talking about 16-year-olds? I don't even know. Okay, yes. So here's the next sex in the news.

Sex and the suburbs. Famous psychosexual therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer gave an informative lecture for plant parenthood on sex and the suburbs. She brought the house down with her heavy German accent, tongue and cheek humor, and her words of wisdom on a very sensitive topic. Sex, of course. I heard her speak last year I interviewed her. She was amazing.

How old is that? She's like 85. She's like 85 or something. No way. She said, I'm talking about sex and the suburbs in the city. You better listen to the lecture, and I hope you come back and tell me

that you learned something. I'm talking about good sex, and in particular, to keep bored of the bedroom, she said, one question from the audience, after 38 years of marriage, how do we spice things up? West Timers response, when you go out for a walk

with your significant other or on vacation, always think about sex. So she's right, that you have to think about sex to want to have sex. So that's one of the advice that I, that's a piece of advice that I've given to people a lot is that if you feel like your libido has been low

or you haven't been turned on lately, start to think about sex, like start to sexualize things around you, start to think about what it felt like the last time you had sex, start to like, you know, look at someone that you find attractive and think about having sex with them. I know you do that anyway,

with people who walk past you on the street. Every man does that. Every man does that. And one woman emailed a few weeks ago that she does that. I know you do that anyway, with people who walk past you on the street. Every man does that, and- Every man does that, and one woman emailed a few weeks ago that she does that. I don't do that. Really? Maybe for a second, but I think more about cuddling. Cuddling?

I like cuddling. Remember a couple of years ago, for some reason, that's weird that you bring that out. I was remembering, there was like cuddle parties. Yes, we had the person on from Cuddle. There are, there was still existence in San Francisco. Really? I haven't like... I know, I think they were on the show, but they were going to be on the show.

They do these cuddle parties where you just go and you cuddle with people. It's like, organized like 20 people and you just cuddle. And you hug and you stick cuddle. And apparently it's your endorphins go spiking and you're supposed to do it. I like cuddling. I mean... would you ever go to cuddle party? I don't know if I'll go to a cuddle party. I've been to sex parties, but never a cuddle party. But I know the owner.

I met the owner of a who started in. Apparently they do. Well, San Francisco, I went to this crazy sex party a few weeks ago. Wasn't a sex party. It was called a second base party. And it was a supper club, which is the second base party. Yeah. So women, if they, had a choice to wear tops,

and if you didn't wear a top, you put pasties on your breasts, so you weren't walking around breastless. Yes. Breast-free. Breast-free, breast without anything in your breasts, covering your breasts. And I chose to keep my shirt on,

but it was like a play party kind of thing, but it wasn't that sexual, but there was tons of people there. Were they making out? There were people making out and doing stuff like that, dancing, and crazy sex dances with people taking off their shirts with the pasties underneath. It was fun.

I've been doing a lot of partying, like not partying, but going to parties. Yeah. Like hence, five Halloween parties. That's amazing. I'm so amazing. Halloween, I stayed home. You did?

Yeah, I did laundry. Oh my God, because you're not drinking. Yeah, but you know what, also what I did. Uh-oh. I bought this new toy And I'm not we're not endorsed by them or anything like that But it's a new awesome way and I love it to listen to the sex with Emily show What is it about a Apple TV? It's a hundred bucks. You did it's amazing. Is it a TV? Amazing. It's not a TV. It's this little boy little I've heard about it right next to your TV. You can

next to your TV and you can listen to iTunes radio. You can listen to podcasts. You can check out your friend's flicker. If you have Netflix on demand, you can watch it on there. You can run movies on iTunes. Do you listen to the show? Yes. You can listen to show on it. That is awesome. I've heard about it. And it picks up like every

single computer in your house. I have to get a TV then. You do have to get a TV. It's on the list. It is amazing and it's a new way you can listen to this. That is so cool. It's gotten great reviews. Oh, that's so cool.

People have a lot of people listening through Stitcher too. Stitcher is one of my other favorite on one of them on the go. I love the Sankoo Stitcher. Stitcher on your smartphone. It's an app. Download it. Stitcher. Stitcher.com. Okay, Stature on your smartphone. It's an app. Download it.

Stature. Stature.com. Okay, brain takes less than seconds to fall in love. This is a new study that came out. A recent study used functional magnetic resonance imaging to see how love affects the brain. Its calculations of love has attracted plenty of attention. For example, the time taken to fall in love clocks in about one-fifth of a second. Not the six months of romantic dinners and sharing secrets some might expect.

Also, 12 areas of the brain work together during the love process, releasing euphoria in inducing chemicals like dopamine, acytosis, adrenaline, and vasopressin. Love's high is similar to a cocaine rush. Love influences sophisticated intellectual processes of the brain too. When a person feels in love, their mental representation, metaphors, and even body image are also affected, overall, they found love is very good for you. Couples who had just found love

had significantly higher levels of nerve growth factor, and it's crucial to the survivor of the sympathetic and sensory neurons. So some believe NGF can reduce neural degeneration, not a bad side effect. On conditional love, the type often seen between a mother and child lights up the common and different brain areas, including the middle of the brain. Not surprisingly, passionate love fires the reward part of the brain, but it also affects the higher order cognitive functions seen in body image. So it's saying that all these come that love is good for you

and that you fall in love in a quarter second. I can't fall in love or lust. I don't that's what I understand. I don't think that you really fall in love in a fifth of a second. Do you think you do? You fall in love all the time. I think you fall in love pretty easily, but in and out pretty easy. I fall in love for you. I was waiting in the lobby and there's hot chick that came out. I'm like, I bet metas is banging her. Which was like, she had long dark hair and she was thin, she was cute. I was like, oh my god, I do know menace I didn't say that. But I wanted to know if it.

Anyway, so you fall in love right away. But it is true that when you're falling in love, that's how whenever we have that euphoria, that three month high, when you first fall in love with someone, it's literally changing your brain chemistry. That you are feeling like, remember when you got engaged right away, I mean, you were like all your chemicals in your brain, we're going crazy.

Yeah, going crazy is right. And then they came back down and and just asked me to marry. What are you doing? Oh, menace, menace, menace. People always ask about that, but you're in a good place now. Yeah, I'm here.

Don't you think? With you. I know, I love it. We're in a good place now. Yeah, I'm here. Don't you think? With you. I know, I love it. We're in a dim room and we're talking about sex. We are in a dim room. It's not a hard life. I love my life. Yeah.

I feel very lucky that we get to talk about sex for living. Yeah. It's not bad. It's not a bad wrap. It's not a bad wrap. It's true. We could be laying bricks. And thank you to everybody, though, that supports us.

Yeah, I don't know if I thank you all enough because we are on top 10 and iTunes and I This is my life This is my livelihood my life and I live for it in all those ways and I could not do it without everyone And I love your letters and hearing from you We're gonna get into mail a second but first a word from our sponsor all right tune up media Okay, tune up media.com is so It is the, it changed the way that I listen to my music because it cleans up your iTunes completely. So you use it and it clean intelligently, identifies and fills in missing information using acoustic fingerprinting,

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what a top selling, top selling piece of software. So you can get 20% off Tuna Gold with promo code Sex With Emily at checkout. It's good through November 30th, 2010. You can find out more about tune up by visiting iLoveTuneUp.com. And they also have something called Tuniverse and it allows you to watch music videos, read artist bios catch up and leave its news artists and more. But really, it cleans up your freeing iTunes. I mean, your iTunes Amest, mine are a mess. It was a mess. Oh, my, a mess. And I just also, when I bought my Apple TV, I bought a new, I, what is it called, the, oh, iPod. You bought an iPod? Yeah, I thought no one does anything more

because they have iPhones. My iPhone is so messed up. Okay. So I just bought a little tiny one. You should do this tune up. I'm serious. I figured it out, so you know. Yeah.

It's easy, so it cleans everything up. So everyone, check out tune up. Let's get into some mail. All right. That's what I'm like. Thanks, thanks everyone for emailing me, feedback at sexwithatemlee.com. Some of you emailed me through Facebook. Let's get into some mail. All right. That's what it likes. Thanks everyone for emailing me feedback at sexwithemley.com. Some of you emailed me through Facebook. However, you can find me.

You can email me. Hey Emily, I found you on Stitcher and I was wondering, I got out of a relationship of nine months with a girl I was truly in love with, but we fought a lot and it wasn't fun. I'm with someone new now and it's only been a few days since I broke up with my ex. A lot of people think it was the best thing to do

and I should have done it before. My problem, I still feel bad and have doubts about the breakup. How do I get rid of these feelings? Thanks, Steve. OPS. I'm turning 16 in December. You're just young 16. Is that a joke email?

Did somebody write that in as a joke? It might be a joke. PS on 16. I don't know. It might be a joke. P as some 16. I don't know, it might be a joke. Do you think it's a joke? I never know. Do you think it is? I mean, I would say, you, you, you, gosh.

You shouldn't be dating anyone longer than nine months when you're 16. Go out and have fun with this new person. You do not make a mistake. You're not marrying the person that you're dating at 16. 16, anyone out of somebody? That's a good run. Nine months at 16?

I mean, leave your nose there. That's a good run for 16enia. Maybe it is a joke But anyway, if you're listening and you just book up or someone and you're with someone else I do think it's good to have a grace period before you jump into another relationship But sometimes it's hard because you a don't want to deal with the feelings of the breakup So you immediately spike your endorphins by meeting someone new and then you want to get into that relationship again So you're you're avoiding feeling the pain. I used to do that a lot.

I used to always go from one to the next. Literally, I would break up with someone and that, and I'd go out and meet someone new. And even though I wasn't ready, I would start doing that person, and I stopped doing that. Like it was a bad pattern. I mean, I thought for me, it was an unhealthy pattern

because I was never without a boyfriend, so I changed that. But I think that you need some time Yeah, you're just to heal just to sleep around it's crazy I know people like that I know this girl. Yeah, I know this girl since high school. I haven't been in high school for like I don't know 12 years now or something ever since then she's had a boyfriend back to back to back to back to back Yeah, everything single can you stay single for like this? I did that in my 22.

Exactly. Is this the one that you talked about that you was always the wrong timing and she had another one? You've got a few of those. But I was like, then my 27 was like, oh, Emily, you're the girl with always has a boyfriend, always a boyfriend, but I'm not. I've the last few years I don't have a boyfriend's

and I'm really proud of myself because I broke a pattern. Life is all about breaking your patterns that are not healthy anymore. And it's a lifelong struggle. Who are you going to end up with? I don't know. I might, I might, I might not, but I think I will. My mom thinks I will. She keeps waiting.

She's like, I'm waiting for the phone call when you call me and you say, Mom, I've met the guy. But I don't know if it's going to happen. I'm not doubt, I think it will when I'm ready, but I don't feel even ready right now. How crazy is that? Really? I don't feel like I'm ready to meet.

I just feel like I'm so focused on my work, which you can appreciate. I've got a lot going on right now, and all I want to do is work. And I've had guys ask me out, I'm like, sorry, I got to work tonight. Gotta write my sex tips, gotta write this, gotta do that. Which could be looked at as avoidance, maybe I'm avoiding, sorry, I got to work tonight. I got to write my sex tips, got to write this, got to do that. Which could be looked at as avoidance, maybe I'm avoiding

meeting someone, but I really think I'm just have a lot going on and I'd rather just get that shit done. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so they have it. Emily Menace, I listen often, loved the orgasm tips, and I think everyone, every single one of them would work on me. If you ejaculate in my face, it's a special occasion.

Sweet. That stuff is earned. And only if they want it. And I'm prepared. It's about love. That ejaculation. And like menist is all about pleasure for the girl. Most of us really want to please our men. Meg from Long Island. Meg. You're all about pleasing the girl. Menist, since when are you all about pleasing? I've always been, you never listened to anything I say. Do you say stuff? I say go. I go as long as until she gets there. That's true, that's true.

No, you're right. It's a science, everybody. It is a science. It is. You have to pregame or something. OK, so she likes, well, this is coming from a conversation we had about ejaculation on the face. And I believe menace you brought that up.

Yeah, probably. I don't know. I like it. Who does it? doesn't I don't some women don't like it so Mendel like it so Whatever let them come on your phrase now, yeah, but she likes it Meg from the Long Island. So why not there's nothing wrong with that Nothing wrong. There's nothing wrong with anything It's nothing if it makes you feel good and I why not? It she likes it and it's earned, as long as she doesn't make them, you've been over backwards for it, then I totally support it.

I support you, Meg, if it turns you on, then I'm okay. That's the thing about sex, everyone's like, am I normal, am I okay? It's like, if you're okay with it, I'm fine with it. Can I ask something if this is normal? Sorry to go off, because I was just thinking of actually the real housewives of Atlanta because I was watching them last night.

They're talking about putting sugar in the vagina. Bad, bad, bad, bad. Do not put sugar, do not put whipped cream. That is bad for your vagina because it creates bacteria. They were talking about doing that. They're like sugar, like powder sugar and sugar in the vagina. That is so wrong.

It was a one girl on there. It's so bad for you to put any sugary substances. Really you have to be careful about what you put your vagina. Even if you're using a sex toy, you should make sure it's clean. If you're using lube, make sure it's like the right kind of Loub. Like don't, we get so much more than that. I thought it was crazy. That's crazy.

Well, first of all, how did this even come up on the Real Housewives? They were just talking about guys performing oral sex on women. And she's like, oh, you gotta put sugar in the vagina. She said that. I was like, yeah.

I was like, I don't think that's right. That is so not right. You have to be so careful. You get an infection. People don't try to say how. Don't try that, that's show. I've seen that show because I always played at my gym. That's the only time I watch TV is at the gym every day.

I love them. Don't talk bad about them. I love them all. What do you love? I love them all. I do. Do you really? And the Beverly Hills one is good too?

Yeah, it's cool. I still can't tell them all apart, but what I- They all look alike, I saw the preview. But what I like about the show, and I only like it because somebody else messaged it, is they actually are the ones that really have money. Like all the other shows kind of pretend they have money.

Right. Whatever when they really don't. But these girls really do have money because they're going and you actually get to see cool things that they get to go do. Like they go, one of the husband's owns like the palm. So they get to go see the awesome rooms and they, one guy owns the Sacramento Kings. So they go court side and all this stuff. That's cool.

That's cool. That's cool. That's what I like about the show. They want you to have money on those shows. But I really can't like. These are donate to my show so I can have money when I record the show. I have a donate button on my website if you want to support the show. So you're not in like a shack when they show you?

I know, my apartment's cute. You've seen it. Yeah. It's not that cute. No, it's really cute. But it's not like, palatial. Yeah. But that's fine. Okay, dear Emily, just happened to come across your show on iTunes last night and downloaded

a few episodes. Listen to my first quickie episode this morning on my drive to work. Works out great as my drive is about 15 minutes. It was the orgasm show. I really enjoyed listening to your banter back and forth about things with menace. Here's one thing I wanted to comment on. I'm now in a relationship just under a year and the sex is amazing.

However, there are a few things I'm pretty new to. One, she's not too eager to get into oral sex. She likes giving, but she's really shy about receiving. I told her how beautiful her body is, but it's a slow process. That's fine for me, I can wait. The other thing is that it's interesting and new for me is that when we have sex, she's very interested

in making me orgasm first, and then afterward she pulls out a little vibrator and gives herself an orgasm. It seems that either I or she doesn't have the ability to orgasm from penetration. Mind you, there have been a few times where I've manually stimulated her to orgasm, so that's good, I guess. There have been a few other times when I just keep going like the energizer bunny and don't orgasm. It tends to drive her nuts and feel that she can't make me orgasm. It's not true at all, but there are just times when I don't do it. Anyway, I thought I'd share and see if you had insights if I'm odd or not.

L-O-L. Okay, you're not at it all. Only 30% of women, 35% of women, whatever the stats are, can actually have orgasms through penetration alone. Most women need direct clitoral stimulation. So it sounds like she's taking care of herself at the end, and that's totally normal and fine, and you shouldn't beat yourself up that you can't have an orgasm.

And the fact that you can't always have an orgasm, I think that's normal too. I've heard that a lot from men. I've actually experienced that with a guy that just couldn't, didn't every time. It's not as normal as it is for women, not as whatever normal. It's not as common, I mean, it's totally normal, but it's not as common for men, men usually can more so, but there's

nothing wrong with you. You got no problem. I don't have his name here, but he didn't give his name, but there's no problem with you. And oral sex, I wonder why. I mean, I might try talking to her about it, why she's not into oral sex. Maybe she had about it. I know you tell her that her body's beautiful, which is really important. And you tell her that you want to, but some women are just having a shame around their body parts, and they might have had a bad experience. So maybe you could find out a little more information. Don't pressure her, but just maybe you could find out more and start slowly. Or tell her it's all good and have her keep on giving you... Exactly, have her keep her from your sex. What's the problem?

Yeah. Because some men... I don't see a problem there. Men is some men enjoy it. Oh, yeah, because you fully support those men. Men support some men really like performing oral sex on women. There's nothing wrong with that. I know. Menace. Okay. We're not going to get into that. I don't even get into that with you anymore. I've changed. Hey, Emily, menace and crew, I found you on Stitcher. Whoa, just listen to my second podcast.

Here's my question with some background. My wife and I have been married in together for 26 years. She told me when dating for a while that she could not conceive due to her high testosterone and other hormonal issues. Four children later after some rough times going without for six months at a time, our sex life is in super high gear and I've received my fourth, fifth, and sixth oral sex complete with my first ejaculation in front of her that was not in her. All this was in the last two weeks.

Our communication is way better and she lets me know what gets her off. Sorry, long email. Here's the question. Carol, first of all, amazing you four kids and you having great sex. And we're able to write everything down in detail. I know, I love that. Dumbards and stuff. Four children. Four orgasms. Carol is very hairy. Hairier legs than me. Hairy chest and back. Okay.

When, if at all would it be good time to ask her if she would be interested in doing a little laser hair removal for her facial beard and maybe breast. This is the joke. She orgasms. She orgasms. No, I know. She orgasms as a she orgasms No, I know she orgasms as a suck and pinch her nipples when I suck and pinch her nipples during for play a veck Adoration at some more Michael Michelle. Okay, so when do you bring this up to woman? That is very very tricky How do you say to her? I want you to remove your hair? Well, I would say you could just say, honey, did you ever think of, you know, I think it would be hard

if you got rid of some of that hair. I really don't. I have, she ever brought it up as she ever self-conscious of it. Maybe you could like kind of play with a little and be like, you ever think of getting rid of some of that? Or I don't know, that is a tough one because I know women are supermen,

you can kind of be like, dude, you got to hurry back at it waxed. But with women, I think it can be super sensitive. And some women love their hair. And some women love their hair. Have you? Yeah, well, not like that extreme. I'm just talking about the lower region. I was just like, yeah, so what do you do?

I kind of just after a while, I just said, you know what? She gets mad. She gets mad. And I said something. you know what, she gets mad, she gets mad. And I said something and it was all good. What'd you say? I was just like, hey, you know what, I kind of like it groomed a little bit more, yeah. And she's like, okay, cool. Yeah.

And then it was fine. I had a guy email me once and he's like, hey, I was before I saw him. We were, it wasn't like a long distance thing. And he was like, hey, so what do you think about, like grooming down there? Do you have any preferences? And I was like, whatever makes you feel good. think about grooming down there? Do you have any preferences? And I was like, whatever makes you feel good.

Whatever makes you feel good makes you feel good. Because I really don't. I'm not caught up at that. But I can see men with women that's all they see is that. So I would say, I would say just say something to her. I mean, you've been together. Yeah, find out if she said anything. 26 years, I would think that you can

broach this subject with her. Sounds like you guys are in it for the long haul. When maybe she's sleeping bust out of Razor. Do it yourself. Oh, maybe not. But maybe you could buy her laser hair removal treatments for the day. Oh, yeah, right. Well, after you discuss it, I'm a huge fan of laser hair removal.

Ever since I mentioned that, I got tons of email. Go to a good place because I saw an Oprah and they did bad ones. They did? Yeah. What do you mean they did bad ones? Like it was bad, it left scars. So make sure you go to somebody that has like

a couple stars on Yelp or something. Seriously, right? I know one, smooth SF. If you come to San Francisco, you gotta go there. Okay, I've got a quick sex tip, sex story that I want to get into. Okay, this is a new poll that came out as well, a new study, and I just thought it was really interesting. Delaying sex found to lead to a more satisfying relationship. Sometimes a one night stand last for more than a night. A random hookup becomes a boyfriend or a friend with benefits

evolves into a girlfriend, but a new study suggests couples who start a relationship based on physical interaction may be less satisfied in the long run than those who delay sex. It's kind of a puzzle because you think why would it matter, right? Who says University of Iowa sociologist Anthony Hupac, who specializes in the study of sexual behavior, to find out if the researchers conducted exhaustive interviews with 642 people in relationships and found that 56% of them had waited until they were seriously dating and engaged or married before having sex with their partner.

The others had their first sexual with their partner, first sexual encounter with the partner where they were casually dating. So on a scale of 1 to 5, the participants were asked how satisfied they were. Those who started out as non-romantic sexual partners gave an average rating of 3.8, but those who waited until the partnership were serious to have sex noted an average score of 4.2. While those who had sex earlier were on average less happy in their relationships,

he found that the problems weren't necessarily the result of the early sexual interaction. Instead, people who ended up together after what began as a casual fling seem predisposed to a lower relationship quality, meaning they hadn't been after a commitment to begin with. So the people who just fall into sex have, that's interesting, a predisposed to a lower quality.

I don't know how you define the quality of the relationship. It makes sense because a lot of people entering non-romantic relationships are not looking for relationships, but it's much easier, I think, to have a repeat hookup than to have a one-time thing and keep having different partners and maybe get sucked into a relationship. So they're constantly people get sucked into relationships if they have sex too soon

and they're not making a conscious choice about being together. So in instances where there's a high risk that the person one thinks they're in love with or has sex on the first night is often just interested in sex So it's saying you should delay sex Really? To have a more satisfying relationship

And you know, as I've gotten older, I believe that there's no reason to have sex the first few dates First few months even. I have a friend who just waited two months from dating a guy before she had sex really Yeah, and then what happened and then they had sex and it was amazing, Really? Yeah. And then what happened? And then they had sex and it was amazing. But I feel like- And then what happened? They're still together. She's kind of freaking out about some stuff. But anyway, not because of the sex.

There's nothing to do with the sex. There's nothing to do with something else. But that's besides the point. Face book. But the point is, I've done that. You have a few unique drinks and you go out with some in the first time and then you have sex. And I'm kind of like, why is eating dessert first? like going out for a fine meal and ordering the dessert first.

Why not get to enjoy and savour the taste and the flavors of someone you can fool around, but why jump right into sex the first date or the second date? I don't understand why we do that. I think a lot of times it's do drinking or with pressure or then we'll really connect, but then you end up connecting over sex, more than knowing this person. So then we get attracted to someone, women especially get that hormones

and they get attracted to the guy because they had sex with them, and they don't really like them. So I say delay a little. Yeah, do you know what's funny? What? We've had her on the show, and she's a friend of mine,

Steph Dub, and you guys are from the same area. Michigan. And she says the same thing. She's like, I just want, she's like, what happened to a courting, you know? What happened to the government? We got on dates and we have fun and we enjoy each other's company before we go and have sex.

Exactly. Why not just figure it out? I mean, I've had our time doing that sometimes. I'm like, oh, damn, what are you sleeping with? But I really, like lately, I'm just like, you know, what's the rush? It's just a, I don't know. It's a time factor for me too, though. What do you mean? Meaning I, I don't want to spend too much time with someone. No, no, no, not that I don't want to spend too much time with them is I would like to have sex with them right away, just because if I'm trying to court them, I don't know when I'm going to have time

to take them out on a date again, you know? Right. Because that's happened to me many times like where I don't hook up with them and I take them out on a date and then we try to plan another date and it just gets canceled because I'm doing something else.

Yeah, but that means you're not really interested. The woman that you're really, really interested in, you're gonna make time. And that's how I feel with the guys who's like, oh, I have no time or whatever, the girls have no time, they're not that into you. Because we make time for the people we want to see, man, if you really wanted to see her,

you would have made time. If it was a priority in your life. It's a priority. I swear. I swear. I swear, I swear. I promise. Okay, one more thing from another sponsor, Adam and Eve.

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Check them out. And that's what we got for you here on The Sex with Emily Show. Thanks everyone for listening. Was it good for you? Email me. Feedback at sexwithemily.com.