Sex With Emily - SWE: Clitoris & Compliments

Episode Date: January 15, 2013

Emily gives tips for going down on her and tips for stimulating the clitoris during sex, because she wants women to have glorious, multiple orgasms. Emily describes how to do the "V finger technique" and discusses how to share your fantasies (even the really embarrassing ones). Emily and her sidekick Menace end the show with a heated debate on how often men should compliment women. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. The world's got a hair stand. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage. Is it a common loa? What do you mean like laundry? It shrinks. And we not talk about sex so much.

Are you kidding me? Oh my god. I want to feel so gone. Are you kidding me? Oh my God, I'm so dumb. Being bad feels pretty good. But you know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. to sex with Emily, we're talking about sex relationships and everything in between. For more information about sex with Emily, go to sexfamily.com. You can listen to our podcast, Center for Mailingless, RSS Feed. And there's so much fun stuff to do, and there'll be even more fun stuff to do because we're relaunching our website, which is very exciting.

I'm here with Menace. Hi, how you doing? I'm great. How are you menace? I'm good. It's good to see you. You too. It's great to see you.

It's great to see you. It's great to see you. TGIF, baby. I know I know what are you gonna do tonight? I'm going to a birthday party Yeah, actually the guy been dating it's birthday really. What did you do for him? I? Wow, what did I do? What would I do what will I do? I will do him That's it dude. I'm good and bad No, I'm gonna get him something after the show Oh really? His birthday is today and you're gonna get something after the show. His birthday was a few weeks ago and I actually-

Good luck with that. Next. I'm busy. No, I didn't. Yeah, I'm gonna work on that. You're so bad. I'm the worst girlfriend in the world. That's the girlfriend?

No, I'm not a girlfriend. I'm not a girlfriend. I'm not a girlfriend. I'm not a girlfriend. I am not the best girl today. I'm not the best girl today. I'm not the best girl that's a friend. I'm a girl that's a friend that I'm not a good girl. It's so funny because my ex-boyfriend, I saw him and he's like, you were the worst.

He's one of my- Wait, you had a boyfriend at a time? Yes, I used to have boyfriends until I realized that they did not work for me. Yeah. I hate the term boyfriend girlfriend makes me. Yeah. And you know, why put a label on it? Why'd you got a label for me, man?

Why you got a box of me in? You know, why you got a doodette stuff? I just don't want it on the open. You know, it's just my personal business. I don't like to let people know what's going on with my life. I don't want everyone to know a business. I don't want everyone to know a business. It's not it. That's what it is. It's everyone to know how big this is. It's not it.

That's what it is. It's so not it. I'm lying. Just be real. And I guarantee you, it will open you up to new things. Yeah. I guess so. Just throwing it out there.

So I'm going to go to a birthday party, and then I'm going to work. You're going to get wasted. Maybe. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. You're going to get a job. What are you doing tonight?

What's today, Friday? It's again, Yeah, I'm number the part about oh I want to see this movie called take me home tonight Oh, what's it about? It's you know, I love anything 80s and it's just a movie that's based on the 80s Oh cool. Are you gonna go see it? I might go see it with it with a little cute hottie Maybe a young tinderoni as they they say, in the hip-hop scene. Is that what they say? Yes. I educate you every day on the whole thing. I know you do.

I know you do. We've learned a lot from each other. OK, but before we move, and you go more than for me. Honey, you've learned a lot from me. I've, you, in my tutelage, I've raised you. I learned so many things that I don't like. Laundry, hand jobs, women that drink wine. I've molded you.

You were like a lump of clay when I met you. You made me realize all the things I hate about women. And I like to thank you for that. That was not my goal. That was not my goal. That was not my intention. No, you were just this little kid. I mean, I could tell it's to raise my menace when I first saw him, but I won't.

Can I say one thing that's going to embarrass you right now? Go ahead. When we started the show five years ago, menace, I remember you not knowing what kind of link it was. I thought she, isn't she like work with with George Bush or something like that. Kind of Linga's rice, right? He was like, well, we can't say that on the air. I'm like, it's kind of Linga. It's oral sex

people. Yeah, but I didn't know if that was a medical term or not because see you're very sneaky. See the thing is like we were on terrestrial radio when I we first got together and I was the guy that controlled the dubbun because I was the guy that would save us from the FCC and getting fined. And so here's you know Emily asking why we can't say blowjob on the radio because FCC doesn't like blowjob on the radio and then so Emily would come up with like these crazy slang terms that I never get some philatio crazy that I didn't know before and I didn't know if it was Safe to say it on the radio so to be safe I would hit the dump on Sorry people. I don't want to get sued for millions of dollars. Okay. Yeah. All right. Okay. Good story. Give me crap about that. I'm like, it's so cute. Because you never read

the FCC manual. Yes I did. I had to take those exams online. Yeah. You just click the buns and you never read it. I clicked the buttons. I didn't, you're right. That's true. I didn't read it. But I did pass. Okay. So today's show, this is a shorter show and we are going to just, this is just straight forward sex tips because it's obviously sex with Emily. And I just feel like I want to just get into some like hardcore, just, let's just give you some tips. Just straight, I've got little bitty tips here. We're just going to run through them.

And also if you want to, but first I got to give a shout out to our sponsor, tune up media. Tune up media is the number one selling plug-in for iTunes and Windows media player. It offers must-have digital music management and music discovery features. So you know like your iTunes, how it's all messed up, I assume that everyone's iTunes is mislabeled like mine. It has those annoying track 01s, those unknown artists. You have band spelled five different ways. Tune-up goes in and it literally just cleans up all your iTunes and it's all neat and perfect and it all just looks beautiful and it's uniform and you would love it. You will love Tune-up. And what I want to say is that you can try Tune-up for free by downloading Tune-up light.

And once you see what it does to your music library you're gonna want to get 20% off tune up gold with promo code sex with Emily you get 20% off tune up gold you got to use sex with Emily promo and code and you will love it it'll change your life now for some six tips oh really what are you gonna teach me today making me feel like I feel like. I'm just playing with you. Don't get all but hurt. But hurt? Yeah. Is that a sexual thing?

Yes, it is a sexual thing. I get but hurt sometimes. But you'll get but hurt tonight. I get but hurt. Probably not. Well, you know, enough martinis maybe. I love martinis. Do you know that I drink martinis? Are you just saying that?

There's a lot of chick-shrink martinis. I know that you drink martinis. We've never drank together. That's true. We have ones. You tried to kiss me once. No, I didn't. Yes, you did. I just had a flashback.

I didn't try to kiss you once. You kind of did. What Christmas party? Exactly. It was like five years ago. Are you talking about the CB... Yeah. Combing? Yes.

No, I never tried to continue. You kind of did. What are you talking about? I think you did. I just had a flashback of me driving you and you were like, hey, you were drunk. Are you, you're, you're, medically insane.

Maybe. Because that did not happen. That is a separate fact. That is a separate show. It will happen. Maybe that was someone else. It probably was. Ready, sex tips. Sex isn't a race. So take time to explore her. Focus on her thighs and lower belly. Make a mental circle two inches around the outside of her vagina and don't cross the line while you kiss, lick, and cross. Okay we've talked about this before. Don't go right for the duel. Spend the time on the outside. Okay, just do it. Okay, make a fantasy lottery.

Both you and your lady write five sexual fantasies down on five separate notebook cards. Then head to a restaurant where you can get a booth and some privacy in a public setting over dinner And why and pull out the cards and make three piles? Yes, maybe someday and not in your life Put the possible in a shoebox and once a month pull out a winner. I Just think couples need to talk about their fantasy. Why do I have to go all the way to the restaurant? It's just we're just saying that you could but you don't have to go to the I'm just saying that couples I think that person that unnecessary and cost me money Especially if I got to make a reservation. Yes listen

Couples have been together for years and they don't talk about their fantasies. Yeah, and a lot of women don't know what their fantasies are And they that's why you're gonna in the answer sex life is you're gonna talk about fantasies So if you got to write it down to make a big out of a guy had a fantasy said he says I want you to masturbate me with your feet like a monkey would you do it I'm just throwing it out there that make monkey I see wrote it on his little post that note that he put in the tree box do I have to make monkey noise like maybe really maybe I'm just want to see which one you're open to you're open. Okay cool

Yeah, I'm curious about the noises and I don't know okay Ready give her the perfect complement. Oh, God. This is never gonna happen the best compliments are the ones that involve multiple senses You have beautiful breasts. It's nice. However, you beautiful breasts They feel so soft and warm in my hands is much more intimate. It's true. Intimate Intimate. We all want intimacy. The women want intimacy, okay? All right, give her a V To increase Clotoral contact when she's on top make a V with two fingers and place it

So the point of the V just between the two knuckles is I'm trying to do this here is directly over her clitoris Your finger should come down on either side of your penis as she rides you So this is when you're having sex this will stimulate the clitoris inner labia and urethra as well as Ed intensity for you Do you got it kind of yeah, you're like yeah, whatever I'm doing it. Yeah, you're just going like the peace sign like you're richer Nixon or something. Okay. Keep contact and direct. The nerve packed clitoris actually extends several inches under the skin on either side of our vagina, like a wishbone, which means you can massage it without direct pressure to the bud. Because guys go right for the bud like there's a gluteus.

That doesn't feel good. Trace the extensions with flat, wide, extra wet tongue strokes are slow fingers zig-zags. Don't forget, Loub, then rub a slow spiral around the top, drawing closer with each pass. The combo of anticipation and indirect contact will bring her pleasure centers to life. That's what I do. You don't. You should. I need a diagram on that one.

Well, we're saying don't go right for the bud. We're saying don't go right for the clippers. Go rub the areas outside of it. Yeah, I do. I get it. You should give me the hand motion and everything. Show me how to do it. Yeah, that's good.

Call her within 48 hours. A beautiful woman gave you her number. Call her within 48 hours. A beautiful woman gave you her number. Use it within 48 hours. Otherwise, you look scared or stupid for resorting to high school minis. Wait, I thought it was a three day rule. Now it's two day rule. It's two day now. Yeah.

I think two day, you met a girl you like or you asked for a number. Just car. Yeah. That's something we talked about in the last show. Call her within five minutes. Don't call her within five minutes. I think you should text her psychotic pictures and then it's your penis Yeah, one with your why do guys do that? Why do they guys? No text pictures of the weener. I

Why do you go have you ever been to the Rulette it's the I forget it's like webcam roulette or something like that and if you go there It's you're supposed to like Just click it and you have your webcam on and then you'll just go and another personal pop-up. It can just talk to them Oh roulette check roulette. Yeah, but try roulette sucks because every single other person is a winner I think guys just like showing their winners the all of Really that's what they do aren't you? It's just a wiener fest the entire time. I'm never gonna do that. No, it's not fun Talk to a wiener. No, you can't talk to a wiener and you don't want to see a random penis that you don't know yeah like

A penis is a is a nice thing when you know who is attached to but if it's just a random penis Like a woman's breasts. I think, are beautiful to look at, a woman's body, even if you don't know who it is, but just the penis sitting there on the middle of the wilderness. Yeah. Just a trunk out there by itself. Just a trunk. No, thank you. Put your penis away. Okay, another set tip here. This is my favorite one. Yeah. Because this is something that I've been dealing with, and it's really important. This isn't a secret. No, this is a separate.

I'm going to move in along here. We're sex sticks. You're talking about penises and chat roulette. Flatter her five times a day. Oh my god. Are you serious? Yeah. Dude, I know.

No, no, you always talk about me though. That number is low. Low? Are you serious? I'm 5 times a day 10 Hey, but I'm not safe by compliment her at least 5 times day It'll make her feel special appreciated and closer to you and the more connected she feels the more sexually Inspired she'll feel away. I've talked about this with my girlfriends a lot that like I can't be told enough And this is gonna sound like I've got some ego problems or like I need to be like I'm insecure and whatever

No, I think I'm attractive. I know that men find me like guys I'm with they think I'm attractive I want to hear it when I walk in the door be like you look happy Maybe you look sexy or I love your whatever like I like how you do that We women want to be told that we're beautiful and attractive and that you find us desirable all the friggin time So five times a day is fine ten times is better No way Women men don't do it just like she knows and she's gonna get a big head No, no, no, we're gonna like you more if you compliment us

I'm telling you you're gonna walk all over is more When you're so wrong with this that I'm telling you because I was having this issue in a relationship that I was in And I was like I don't even know if this guy likes me like does he like me? He's with this that I'm telling you because I was having this issue in a relationship that I was in and I was like I don't even know if this guy likes me like does he like me? He's never told me I'm hot. He's never told me that I he's attracted to me And I didn't even know if he liked me or not and I started I pulled my girlfriend's I was like don't you want to be told that you're hot or attractive? They're like all the freaking time. They're like 20 times a day. It's where they got it

There's not one woman that I asked so medicine you can be Twenty times a day. It's where we got it. There's not one woman that I asked so medicine you can be like Know what they start when you start using that through their advantage. I'm not saying like you mean their advantage the Vanage meaning that they start taking you for granted dude separate issues not true How's that not true? Oh, he thinks I'm so hot so therefore I'm not gonna what? Just you know, I I know I have him. You're wrong. I have him in the back of my pocket. You know honey, this is exactly what I'm trying to say.

And they shouldn't do that. They absolutely should. Women don't, we don't. I'm not saying they should never do it, but 10 times a day is ridiculous. So five, I said five. Five times a day. They're ridiculous too.

No, it's a, honey, when you're with someone that you like, don't you just walk in the door and you're like, you look sexy baby. I don not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that.

I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that.

I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not saying that. I'm not fun here. I was things that you like about them. Like, you know, I really attracted to you. I think you're talking about a fantasy world. We're talking about Disney.

And everyone's in love and there's princesses and prince and everyone's lovey-dovey and you're so beautiful in that dress. That's not the real world, baby. That is, that is. It's not. It's not. It's not. We just want to feel desired.

We want to know that you find us attractive. I'm not going to argue with you that I can't even believe. I just know it's called the it's called the game and it sucks. It's not a game. We want to feel desired and we want to feel attractive. I know you do. I know you do I know you do and yeah, I totally agree with you. I'm just saying it's It's not gonna work to the fellows of anage. That's all You're so wrong Okay, we're gonna have to agree to disagree fine. Okay Next next tip here, and then we'll wrap up. We got two more start sex in a new place start sex outside the bedroom The same old place leads to the same old pattern so explore some new erogenous areas the kitchen the bathroom Quebec City

Your bodies will be in a new place is making it unlikely that you're followed old routines This is just for couples who've been together just have sex in another room have sex in the car sex in the In the limo in the limo have your red sex in limo. Yes Me too. Yeah, No way. Was that you? We'd remember being a mislatina. Somebody emailed me. Someone tweeted me. Yeah. You find me at sex with Emily on Twitter and they were like, did you give me a set of hand-drop yet? Did you see? Oh yeah, I saw that today. Right. Which I didn't know. There's no hand-drop giving. But okay, let's always, I always forget this by you say,

a crazy spot that you had sex with. With the crazy spot that I've ever had sex. Yeah. I'd have to say on the chair, on the gondola. Oh, yay, yay, okay. Going a sugar bowl in California, ski, ski place. Like, we were inside that section, the mountains. That's cool.

That was pretty cool. And then one time on the ice like on an aphpon that was frozen, but my butt got really cold. Yeah What about you? I think the craziest time was There were just this giant like concert venue like 22,000 people and I was backstage But it wasn't a concert. It was a comedy show, like a giant comedy show. Okay. With like 15 comics and David Allen Greer was there. You might know, like I think the most notable. He's done a bunch of movies and so like that. He was on early so he left and he left his dressing room.

So I just like got in his dressing room with some other chick and I locked up the dressing room and hooked up over there. And but that was the same shake that I hooked up with on the way back in in the the limousine too. So it was the same. Yeah it was a duper. Wow that's awesome. I had sex. I just remember this. I totally spaced at Coachella Music Festival backstage. No way. Yeah I just forgot backstage but like back in the um beyond the backstage. Uh huh. It comes up against the woods. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like in the woods.

I'm going to coach all this here. You're going to have to give me a map of where I had sex on the upper. I was a little f'd up. Oh, nice. Was Wilco, Wilco playing? Because I know you love Wilco. I love Wilco.

I don't think they were playing though. OK, here's another sex tip. And then we'll, OK, give her a proper warm up. Clotoral contact in particular feels abrasive without a proper warmup if a woman Yips are in hell suddenly when you go there instead of purring or moaning you've jumped the gun Give her a proper warmup All right a lot of clotoral talk. It was all really important. Okay everyone Are you you seem upset with me now that Did I need to agree with you on everything?

Well, because I think that you are, because I think you're wrong. Okay. No, I'm not upset at all. I love you. I'm not upset. I just think the compliment thing I know because I've done polls. You've done polls, huh? Yeah. Informal. How many polls have you done? Informal polls.

To every, because I was having this issue and I asked my friends, I was like, don't you, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, that's your own issue. Okay, that's not my own issue. I mean, that's last word on it. Fine, go ahead, I'm not gonna fight you on it. I feel like you're my brother, like, but like, not it, last word. Touch your last, okay everyone, thanks so much for listening to Sex with Emily. Was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithemily.com.

Hi, I'm Emily, host of the podcast, Sex with Emily. Sex toys aren't just for women. Go to sexwithemely.com slash flesh light to discover the best sex toys for men. The flesh light. A lot of guys say it feels even better than sex and it helps build stamina, meaning a last longer in bed. Go to sexwithemely.com slash flesh light to see my flesh light recommendations and get one tonight.

tonight.