Sex With Emily - SWE: Romantic or Repulsive?

Episode Date: February 9, 2012

Emily and Menace debate whether Valentines Day is adorable or horribly repulsive. If you are going to celebrate the Hallmark made holiday, Emily breaks down the best and worst date ideas, including fast food picnics and Costco dates. Also, Emily talks about elitist penises, sex with virgins, men who don’t want sex, and the worrying, titillating trend of robberies at sex toy stores. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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It's shrink? And we not talk about sex so much. Are you kidding me? Oh my god. I'm so, so, so, so. Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily.

We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between. For more information, go to sexwithentley.com where we guarantee if you listen to sexwithemily.com and you go to sexwithemily.com and you listen to all of our shows, you will improve your sex life. It just does. It happens over time. People email us, their sex life has improved and yours will as well. If you listen and you become a friends with benefits member, we love all of our friends with benefits members and we so appreciate you signing up. It's 4.95 a month. It's like nothing, right?

For three, four shows a week and you get benefits and special cool things. Okay, so we can't deny this. This is all. Everyone knows that there's something happening very, very soon and we need to talk about it and it's Valentine's Day. Whether you love it or you hate it or you're single or you're alone, we're going to be giving you tips for having the best Valentine's Day. Whether you love it or you hate it, or you're single or you're alone, we're gonna be giving you tips for having the best Valentine's Day ever.

Because even if you hate it, we're gonna make you love it. So we're gonna be talking about Valentine's Day, we're gonna be talking about different ideas that like a lot of the media has floated ideas out there. And we wanna know if it's romantic or repulsive, we've also got some good date ideas for you and some good gift ideas.

And we'll be reading your emails and then we got some sex in the news. And today I'm with my interns and my assistant Kelsey, we're all here in the studio, menace is gone for a few days. And yeah, and to spread, this is another thing that's very important. Sex family spread the love Valentine's Day contest.

Go to my website, sexfamily.com, click on spread the love and you'll realize, you'll figure out how to enter the contest. You just need to follow us on Facebook and Twitter, sex with Emily, and retweet us. We've got so many things to give away that we can barely walk around our office. We kind of look like one of those hoarders, like the hoarders show, where you can't really move around your office because you can't really move around your house because you've got

so much in it. Well ours is filled with sex toys and products that we want to give to you. So enter the contest and like us on Facebook and retweet us. We totally appreciate that. Okay. We've got our poll results of our latest poll. Do you enjoy casual sex? Okay.

No, I am a woman, 15%. yes, I am a woman, 17%, no, I am a man, 24%, and yes, I am a man, 43%. So the men are loving their casual sex. The women only like it at 17%, so who they have in casual sex with, I wonder. Okay, we've got a new poll. It's a Valentine's Day poll. And Valentine's Day, and Valentine's Day. A, makes me warm and fuzzy. B, makes me want to punch something. C, makes me want to have

sex with random people. D, none of the above. E, all of the above. I hadn't read that one yet. Okay, guys, that's our Valentine's Day poll. This is Tiana St. Next. If you're watching, you know that you can watch and listen to the show every single day that we do the show. This is Tiana. What up Tiana? We spoke about Tiana for a minute because Tiana embarked on a very important venture today. It was her first time we talked her into getting on a website because she's never dated before.

She's a beautiful young woman, never dated online. And she's not dated online. Not dated online. And she just joined OKCupid, which coincidentally, tomorrow's show, we're gonna have Sam Yegan, the founder of OKCupid on our show, so you could ask him,

maybe he knows some ins and outs. So how's it going so far in OKCupid? It's actually really interesting when I was like, why am I signing up for this? Like, at first you feel like desperate, you know? And now I'm kind of playing around with it, and I'm like, wow, some of these guys are really cute. Oh, really?

Yeah, and like, it's actually now, it's getting fun. It's fun. It's fun. Oh, that's good. It's good. So you feel like it's desperate. I feel like dating online has become the norm. I always feel like I don't know anybody

who hasn't dated online. Really? Except for me. But most, just because I don't know why, I haven't. But I've considered it and I feel like more so than not, I'd say out of all my friends, more people than not have dated online. There's not the stigma anymore that you're desperate.

I feel like it was coined, you know that. It told me what. But now I think it's like, you know that. It told me that. Now I think it's like, Well, what are you hoping to find? You said you liked the questions they were asking. Yeah, they like make you take like a, not just like a 25 to 100, like how many ever questions you want to answer pretty easily.

Okay, what were some of the interesting ones? Yeah, like how many times do you brush your teeth a day? And like the most like, I don't know, I hope I get matched up after answering all those questions. And you can answer as many as you want. Okay. The questions were just like really about politics. Like what? Like are you into politics or are you not?

And then it'll ask, there's two sets, like two different parts of the question. Where you answer the question. And then another part will be like what you want them to answer. Oh, wow. So you can have, like, you can answer something completely different, but you're expecting something from them to say, you know what I mean? Right, because you know what I mean? Okay, Kupid has been a really popular site.

I mean, it feels like everyone's at okay, Kupid, but probably because of their great filtering system and the way they have to answer the questions and all that. So I can't, I think you got to come back and update us on how it goes. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake.

I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake.

I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give you an uptake. I'll give Francisco. Bay Area, I mean, maybe it'll make me in touch with people from the Bay Area, but I don't know. Okay, well good job. It's fun.

I'm not like taking it, you know, like, oh, I'm trying to get married on there. No, you should have said fun. I think often dating. Yeah, it's just fun. If you're single and you still think there's a stigma to it, I'm telling you, I know more people that have dated online, that have found their matches online for

real, that got married. The whole thing, like, if gotten married, the whole thing. Like, if you're doing the same thing over and over again and you're complaining that you live in the worst town and blah, blah, blah and you're single, I think that dating online is totally going to make it easier for you. So I think that it'll be a little experiment. It'll be a good experiment. Yeah.

And it'll be like for school, like for this, for school, for sex, or them late, for your work. You can figure it out. You can report back. We want to know how it goes for you. So yeah, we've got a little bit of sex in the news for you too before we get into your emails and some Valentine's Day stuff. Okay, so Snookie from, I was gonna say Real Housewives of New Jersey from Jersey Shore says she's bisexual. Not surprising.

And an interview with Offington Post in support of the newest Jersey store season, Snoookie admitted she'd experimented with girls and was attracted to the female form, but one attempt to relationship with a woman because I like penis, she said. So I guess that's not surprising. I haven't watched a lot of Jersey store, but doesn't seem like everyone's a little by sexual these days if you have to like, do you feel like a lot of your friends have? Well, I think a lot of men in terms of score by sexual. I think everyone's a little bisexual in some kind of way. I mean I think women are more comfortable with women like if they made out it's on a big deal but if men made out and they're you know supposedly straight I think that they'd be

more freaked out. Why do you think most men in the sense have to score bisexual? I think because we're so openly we're so open about our sexuality here. And I don't, I think somewhere else if you went to like Texas or, you know, I'm more mish again where I'm from, they're not going to be like now. Yeah, it's a very openly sexual city. Right, it is. I love this town, except for, yeah, I got fixed up with a few bisexuals this year. And I have to be honest, like, I, it was a little unconfirmed.

I was uncomfortable. I was like, oh, it's you had a a few bisexuals this year. And I have to be honest, it was a little uncomfortable. I was like, oh, it's you to penis in your mouth last night. And we're going to go out, there's just some things that we're not going to do. Anything gets bisexual. But it seems like a lot more women too, have experimented. Have you kissed a girl before?

I have. I've experimented with a girl before. Now I like to, but I'm just more into the penis. I'm more into the penis. I understand. I get it. I'm into the penis too. But you know, we've all had our fun. Okay. Mitt Romney condoms. The same New York company behind the Obama condoms that made headlines in

2008 is now selling Mitt Romney condoms for five dollars each. They're being marked for elitist penises and says their tax-free suite even the poor can afford them. Aledist PENISES, I think there's a little play on words. So everyone's saying that you're not a Romney fan. I'm not a Romney fan either. But people love him. He's doing what I think he's going to be the nominee. It seems like. I'm all Rom Paul.

Yeah. Yeah, I love Rom Paul. I just not a Romney fan. Okay. Well, you can buy it. So you won't be the one buying a Mitt Romney condom. That's okay. So it's not.

No, it doesn't seem like it. But speaking of condoms and speaking of our Valentine's Day contest that I answered, you, we are given away lots of condoms too from lifestyle. So if you're interested in joining the contest again, go to our website, sexthelmy.com. Okay. Sex shop robberies are on the rise. Sex toy shops around America have seen a rash of robberies in the last six months with armed thieves targeting vibrators, magazines, and sex styles rather than money.

One of them are amusing to place in January with a group of teenagers running into a Sacramento's fantasy factory and making up with a handful of dildos. Also, stores in Maryland, Ohio, and Iowa have seen robbers come with replica vaginas and not paying attention to cash. This is so interesting to me that people are so desperate for sex toys that they're robbing stores because they want the sex toys. That's the money. That talks about the proliferation of sex toys around the world or on the country at

least. I mean, the study came out last year that said that more than half of all women owned vibrators. So to say that, like, people are robbing stores for fake vaginas. I don't know what that says about the world, but I think it's very interesting. I think it's very interesting. Yeah. I mean, people are still in sex toys. They're not even like, like, you think they go in the sex zone and be like, we want

your cash. And they're like, no, we would like the vibrator, the de-radix things. I'd like that fake vagina, whatever. That's really interesting. Okay. For this one's really interesting. For Icelandic lovers, there's an incest database. So apparently in Iceland, the small local population of only 300,000 presents a very real danger of accidentally romancing one of your relatives.

Thankfully, a new website called the Book of Icelanders allows residents to check for family background of their dates, up to 1200 years to see if they would be in fact kissing cousins. That's a very strange thing to have to deal with. But I guess with those 300,000 people, it would make sense. I know, but there's still 300,000. There's no reason to do it. No, but there might be 300,000, isn't that much? I feel like different to go. Either I've slept with everyone my friends have. I mean, it's a small, we've raised 700,000 people

here. It's small. I know. This is so small. I mean, my relatives, small, we've reached 700,000 people here. It's small. I know this is so small. That means my relatives, my relatives are a Michigan, but still. That's true. I thought that was an interesting story there. Yeah. Okay, that's what we got for you for Sex and the News. And also, if you ever have any sex, then you stories that you would like to share with

us, you can always email us at feedback at sexwithemily.com. Okay, I'm moving to some emails here. Yeah. Okay. Meeting people after divorce. Then listen to your show for a while and I love it. I am recently divorced but ready to meet new people. I never really played the dating game as I got married young and didn't have to date

a whole lot before. I found the woman I love to say I lack experience in that field would be quite an understatement. That brings me to my question. How do I introduce myself, start a conversation with someone without coming across as a creep? I figured women get annoyed at some point with all the guys in the room trying to get another pants. For me, that isn't my goal. If it happens, great.

But at the least, an interesting conversation would make my day. Any advice for this poor guy, FYI, I'm 29, not sure if that helps or hurts. From VU, in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Well, VU, I would say this is a question that we commonly get asked about, like, are there any special pickup lines? Is there anything in particular that I can say to get a woman? And honestly, I think it's just a matter of being yourself and being comfortable. I know that just might be like, oh, but I'm not comfortable. I'm insecure, but it's a matter of saying, hi, hi, how you doing today? What do you know if you're getting coffee?

I really like those latte. What do you think of the new gingerbread latte at Starbucks? I mean, it can be so, you're standing in line with the coffee shop. I mean, it can be so basic. It can be so, I'm not, you know, you meet a couple of men to woman. You know, I always like a guy, sometimes I think they're gay, but guys were like really nice shoes. I'm like, you know, I mean, compliments a woman, you know, I always like, sometimes I think they're gay, but guys were like really nice shoes, and like, wow, he likes my shoes, I think that's kinda hot.

Any good pickup lines, Tiana, that I've could not pick up lines, but any good openers, think about the guys you've dated. How did they approach you? How did you meet them? Like, what do you do that was right? I think you just kinda need to like, exude like a smile and positive energy and just be confident.

You don't need to go looking for people and just be yourself and be happy. Exude that. Exude like happy smile a lot. Smile and be confident. It's all about wearing your confidence. And also sometimes it helps in situations to think about yourself like you are when you're with your friends.

So you're when you're with your buddies and you're the most comfortable, like you can do anything and be anyone that's not like you're at work and you gotta put on a certain face. Think about, try to get into possess that body, like before you're going out to meet someone or going to a bar or going to a party,

like try to just feel that feeling, like close your eyes, sit in your car, like how do I feel when I'm with my friends? And try to get into that, like, embody that mode of being. And kind of comfort. And kind of put women on this pedestal that, like, you need some special thing. Just be yourself. Because that's what ultimately you're going to be in the relationship and what's going

to make them attractive to you. Yeah, totally. And it's hard. I mean, you like, when you're young, when you get married so young, I know. And you go through totally. And it's hard. I mean, when you get married so young, and you go through divorce, and it's hard to like, you know, people are hard. Because you don't know how to. I know. I actually have a friend who just started this website, which I don't have the name of

right now, but I'll bring it in. And it's just for people, just like you, who are coming out of a divorce, out of practice, things have changed. You know, they might not have had sex thing when you were, you know, who are coming out of a divorce, out of practice, things have changed. You know, they might not have had sex thing when you were, you know, it's like people don't even call you anymore. They text you know, things like that that you just don't even know. Yeah. He's got a whole website for people who are newly divorced. So I will bring that information in for you and let you know. Okay. next email, he doesn't want to have sex. Hi, I'm Lee.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 10 months and our relationship is amazing. I'm so happy with him except for the fact that it seems like he barely ever wants to have sex. The first few months we were dating we had sex every time we were together, but now that we were together practically every day, I feel like we never have sex. I've talked to him about it a few times and he tells me that he's definitely attracted to me and it's just that he's always tired. I just don't know what to do because I have never been in this situation before.

I know we're both extremely happy with each other, but I don't want to use it, but I so I don't want this sex issue to come between us. I don't know what to do at this point to make it better. Please help. And this is from New Jersey, Piscat to a New Jersey, premium friends with benefits member. You know if you're friends with benefits member, you get your emails answered right away. So we appreciate your writing and okay, the sex thing. Miss match libido, that is a really, really common, common question we get asked. You miss match desire, miss match, like you want it more than he does, and like what do you do about it?

Well first I would have to say that you need to talk about it. Communication is lubrication. Have you ever tried to talk to him about it? And ask him, you know, what did he, he's tired. So a lot of times the reason I'm not one of sex is about stress. Are he tired or maybe he's overworked or he's really stressed about his job or money. Money and job stressors are two really big things for men when it makes them don't want to have sex or is he depressed.

I'm wondering how his mood is. I always think I'm not a doctor, but I always think it's a good idea to send, you know, send him in for a checkup, see, make sure everything's working properly. But, you know, you don't tell me how old you are, but, you know, I assume that everything should be working properly and you should have desire. And, and eventually right now it's only been 10 months, but if this is something that is going to continue, I do believe this is something that you're not going to want to be in a relationship for a long time if this is seriously an issue. Because you want to have sex and if it's 10, you're not having sex together and sometimes, you know, maybe you're spending too much time, if this is seriously an issue, because you want to have sex,

and if it's 10, you're not having sex together, and sometimes you know, maybe you're spending too much time together, you're not living together, but you're spending practically every day together, maybe you take some time apart, you know? I think that when you are together, every day couples fall into this rut,

and they're like, oh, you know, we don't have sex, let's just make some popcorn and watch a movie. Have you ever been in that situation with a guy who doesn't want sex or you didn't want sex as much? No, I always want sex. That's good, of course. That's what you work for sex in battle.

I know this sounds bad and I really don't want to, you know, and reply to this like this, but when a guy doesn't want to have sex, you really have to question. Because all, like, men are naturally want to have sex more than we do. I feel like not everybody, not all men, but men are always thinking about sex.

Right. So if he doesn't want to have sex, I think he really needs to doubt and talk to him and be like, just be honest, what's the issue here? Well, he's his tired. I think that's an excuse. Yeah, and it's used for what though. I mean, I think there could be some physiological thing going on. Yeah, no, I think it's true and it is the stereotype that men want more sex than women.

But I have to tell you that I prefer it is stereotype. And I think it's true and it is the stereotype that men want more sex than women, but I've told you that I've heard it is stereotyped and I think it's true. I think it is predominantly true, but I've heard from so many women that of this case, of the scenario that the guy they're with doesn't have sex. Maybe you should start giving him some blow jobs. Just going down on them. Yeah, and then maybe that'll get him going. Yeah, men love the they'll get them going. Yeah, men love the oral sex.

If you just start sex, maybe start there and then... Walks in the door, pull down his pants, give him some little blow job or something like that. Not a bad idea. Who's going to turn that down? I don't know anyone. Raise your hands. Turn that down.

No. And I think a lot of men too, like oral sex over sex. So maybe he... I don't know. Maybe you should start with that. She should start with that. Yeah, exactly. It's a good point. That's always a good answer. Just give me a blowjob. Just throw blowjob is way. He's gonna love it. I mean, who doesn't like that? Oh, honey, just I need to blowjob and just shut up. Okay, having sex with virgins. Hi, Emily. Love your show. Keep up the good work. I have a question. I've been dating my girlfriend for six months now and she's a virgin and we tried

having sex but couldn't because it was painful for her. I know it's painful for the time so I just wanted to ask how I can make it better for her so it's not that bad. Also I kind of have a big penis so it's making it worse. Thanks for your time regards to Riro. Okay so here's the deal. First of all, the first time can be very painful for lots of women. I think that you should use lots and lots of lube. So go buy a good lube. Adminiv.com has sells plenty of lubes.

I love their lube that has the pump. I have it next to my bed. It is a big honking jar of lube. It's a pump lube and you can get use coupon code Emily at checkout and you can get 50% off. Most items at Aluminium, but I'll get it more into that later. But I would say that you got to move slow and maybe start with your fingers, start warming her up. Are you performing foreplay on her? Because women need to open up and actually if you are performing foreplay, if you're performing oral sex on her, if you're turning her on, she'll

be more open, she'll be more wet naturally. But if she's nervous and she's scared because she's a virgin, I mean, it's common that this could happen, that it would be uncomfortable for her the first few times. So I think you guys are going to ease into it, no pun intended, and you're going to ease into it and it'll all work out. But I just say use that to foreplay, use that to loop, and talk about it. And yeah, you don't want to hurt her.

Maybe you just do a little bit of time and see how it goes. And good for you, we're having a big penis. Right? I mean, I wish I had a big penis the first time. No, I'm just kidding. It doesn't matter. Penis doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.

We don't care. It doesn't matter. But I mean, we don't care that much. We just just slowly go into it. I mean, I've had a really big and it's it's It hurts. Yeah, it can't really need to like slowly You need to slowly be slow be really really slow Like if you use your fingers at first Whatever and you slow and go and talk about it a lot how she's feeling how she's experienced ask her You put it all, how you feeling,

put a little more in, how you feeling, a little more in, and then tell you're already in. But it might take a little bit, take a few months, but just slowly work up to it. I think you will be fine. Where you not, she'll be a pro. Exactly, she'll be a professional, giving you blow jobs.

Okay, let's move into our Valentine's Day topic. Okay, Kelsey, did you want to come over here for Valentine's Day? Thanks, Tiana. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Hello. Hi, Kelsey. This is Kelsey.

What up? You might recognize her from all the videos on our website if you haven't checked them out yet. Yeah, you should definitely check out Death of the G-Spot. Death of the G-Spot is very sad. She was very sad because there was news that came out a few weeks ago that the G-spot didn't exist, which we know for a fact that it does. And she's also highlighted in our JMEJ videos where they're funny. Okay, so we're talking about Valentine's Day. We're gonna get into some Valentine's Day stuff.

And there's been a ton, I mean, I can't tell you, since I'm the press and the media, I get hundreds of emails from people pitching me Valentine's Day stories and then all the news media has tips to do on Valentine's Day. So we want to know, we're all going to talk about this here. What do you think of these ideas romantic or repulsive? You decide and if you think they're romantic, maybe you're doing it yourself, we're going to let you know what we think. Okay.

Number one, ask men says, dog treats. The suggestion is to give these to a girl, you've just started dating because you don't know her yet, but you know her dog will like treats. Okay, I personally think that's repulsive. If I was a, if I, I mean, God, repulsive is so strong, do we have to pick that work?

It's not repulsive, it's just, I would give her, so I think buying her dog something is adorable. I had a friend by me, my dog, a Christmas present, and I thought that was so cute. Like, he brought her all these little biscuits, and I thought that was really cute. But he also got me something. So I think you have to get her something as well,

but just giving dog treats is repulsive. What kind of dog treats are they? Because I mean, there's some like high-end dog treats out there. Yeah, but even if they're high-end. They can get some like, penis-shaped dog treats, or... I don't know though, because I feel like giving a girl a dog treat is kind of like... Calling her a dog? Yeah, in a way.

I mean, it's a way of recognizing her dog, but you're not recognizing her. So I think that it's a good thing to do to give her dog a treat for Valentine's Day. That's cute. Wrap it up in a little heart wrapping paper or something, but give her a present as well. I have a dog. I think I'd be cute if I was a dating guy

and he gave me a dog treat. What about dog sweater? No, you still gotta get something for her, but although my dog does need a dog sweater, that would be good too. But no, I think that you got to, you gotta get her something else. You got to get or something too. Okay, number two, cost co-samples.

SmartMarards.com suggests this is a cheap, fun way to spend Valentine's Day. So, okay, let me get this straight. SmartMarards.com is saying that you and your partner, you park in that halacious, cost co-parking line, you get one of those big honking carts and you go through the aisles and you eat the little slimy on a rich cracker and for free and that's fun and romantic. I think Costco is the least romantic place on earth.

I think that is repulsive. What do you think, Kelsey? I'm not into it. I'm not into it either. I mean, I think it's a fun thing to do on a Sunday, like go to Costco, but not on Valentine's Day. If you have a Costco card, maybe you can like pick up some beer or something.

Exactly. Maybe we should try to make these better. So yes, if you have a Costco card, you could go buy her a bunch of cheap alcohol. Sounds good to me. Okay, good deal. Okay, number three, a trip to the bookstore. DealTattle.com suggests you go to a local bookstore to read love poems to each

other for free. What do you think? I think it's really lame. You wouldn't want a guy to read love poems to you. I would like him to actually know I really hope that a dude does not write me something unless he's actually a talented writer. I think a lot of people think they're good at poetry. Right. And it's just kind of one of those awkward situations where you're like, oh yeah, that's... But what do I do if he just makes the effort?

Yeah, I guess you're right. And I mean... But if it's bad, I know. It's like the guy who made me, I talked with us yesterday at the show, the guy, or I'll, the little air Friday, but the guy who made me a naked painting of myself. And it didn't look so good. No, it looks so good. So you got to be a good artist. But this is saying go to the bookstore and read love poems to each other.

I'd say buy a book and read love poems to each other when you're in bed that night. That's kind of sweet. Pick out your favorite love poem. Yeah, I think that's really good. I used to be a guy that we used to read short stories together in the bathtub. And that was really romantic. Yeah, a lot of people like having their partner read to them. I know my sister does that all the time.

She makes her boyfriend like read books to her. Well, she just allows. Yeah, a lot of people do that. That's common. I used to have a guy did that and I thought it was really, I actually thought it was romantic. It was a long time ago.

And I still remember it finally. We were in the bathtub and he'd read me his favorite books and I thought it was sweet. So that's a little twist on the trip to the bookstore. Okay, number four, list yourself on eBay. Cosmo says you make a goofy listing of your love and let your sweetheart win the auction. That's kind of quirky. I mean, I might laugh. I mean, I think it's kind of silly. I mean, some people might think that's really funny. I wouldn't be so turned on by that, I guess. What do you think about that? I think that whenever you're doing anything on Craigslist and you're in a relationship, it's probably a bad idea. But this is eBay, but I know I said. Oh, eBay. I was thinking

Craigslist. I know someone who actually found out that their boyfriend was cheating on them on Craigslist, like finding random people. Oh, and their casualty. But I see eBay. I mean, I don't know. Like, you'd be like, hey, honey, you send her a link and you're like, bid on me. I don't know. I mean, I guess it's cute little.

How much money in my worth? I feel like that's what that means. Yeah, I don't know. I don't like it. I don't think it's an idea. Okay. A heartfelt workout mix. Fitzsugar.com says you should surprise your lover with a sexy workout mix.

I don't know. If he works out every day, your boyfriend goes to the gym, or he's a girlfriend, she's a machine, he is a big runner or something. That could be part of your gift. All your favorite songs that you think are good to go work out with Yeah, as long as it's not one of those things where the person never exercises and you get a gift that's like a Workout right and then you're like, oh, do you think I need to go to the gym more my dad wants bought me a jump rope for Christmas Yeah, I just throw in a gift certificate to weight watchers. Right. Yeah.

Like a gym membership discount. I still like when guys make me like CDs or whatever. Like I love that. Or playlists. They make me like a cute like a playlist. Like because I actually feel like when a guy's made me a playlist in the past, whether it's for working out or not, I always listen to the songs and think like, why did he pick the sun and what does it really mean? And so I think that can actually be a romantic gesture. So I find that romantic, personally. Okay, this is from CoolDates.com. Buy two canvases and paint with paints are do finger painting and design a picture for

one another. I mean, if you're an artsy artsy couple and you want a paint instead of home and have a glass bottle of wine, I don't really mind that. Are you painting each other? You're doing finger painting and you know you've canvases. I don't know.

I mean, it's something to do. Bottle of wine, some chocolates, make some dinner and paint. I feel like it's trying too hard though in some ways. Like, getting the canvases. If you are talented at painting or you want to encourage your partner to paint, then I think it's cool. And I think that finger paints can be a bunch of fun, especially in a sex scenario.

Right. Right. Okay. This is another one from CoolDates.com. Plant trees together. Find a local association that will provide trees and training. I guess that's more like yeah better for Earth Day or something. I mean there are some couples, some earthy couples that would be really into that. I don't personally

not know that into that. What about you? I don't think so. You don't want to plan to tree with your lover. Maybe for like solstice or something like that and then you could like revisit it to the seasons. But nothing like, like I made this big Valentine's Day plan with this tree. We're going to go plan it in this certain place. Yeah, that's a symbol of our love, blah, blah, blah. Like, I don't know. I don't know if that would work. Can buy them a tree.

That would be cool. Buy a tree. Right. Exactly. Okay. Build a fire, snuggle up and read a good book or perhaps romantic poetry together. Make up some hot chocolate or spice cider. I think that's sweet.

If you wanna stay home, because for me Valentine's Day is like not about the fancy dinner and the car and the car and the flowers. That's just so you're seeing the restaurant all these other couples awkwardly trying to have the most romantic night of their life. I actually prefer staying home

and doing something romantic like that. So building a fire, reading a good book, poetry, that could be sweet if you guys are down with that kind of thing. Yeah, I like it. You down? I'm actually kind of down. You find that romantic? It's a little cheesy but in the best way possible.

Right, exactly. Okay. Take a picnic lunch and go to a lake to feed the ducks. Romantic are repulsive. I don't think you to feed the ducks. Romantic are repulsive. I don't think I don't think you to feed the ducks, but I like the picnic lunch. I'm a fan of picnics. I like the sunset. It can be during the day. It could be at night. It could be after work. I don't know where you live. We're here in California. It's pretty nice here. We could do that. Yeah. I like I've had a guy take me over to Marin County

and like pack a lunch and which is right over the go and gate bridge in the Bay area and we went up to this little grassy noal and and had you know wine and grapes and all the sexy food and that was really fun Okay, after an amazing steak dinner complemented by a beverage of your choice head for a private hot tub That sounds pretty good. That sounds good too. Amazing steak dinner.

Although be careful if you eat too much, you may not want to have sex after. Yeah. Like amazing steak dinner, I think steak potatoes, and then you're too full to have sex maybe. But I like the private hot tub. Although I always get skived out by those private hot tubs, I don't know how clean they are.

Depends where you live. Isn't there like some urban myth that like sperm can like live in? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so.

Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so.

Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. Yeah, but I think so. having like intense sex and like a heated because you can't use protection if you need to use a condom like sex in the water always seems like a good idea but it's not, it's never really a good idea.

It's like shower sex. Shower sex is awesome. I actually have a whole page on that, a whole page on that in my book, shower sex. Shower sex is good. You should, there's different tricks for shower sex like there's different ways to do it and stuff like that. It's in my book, I can't remember right now.

I can't get into it, but you lean over, make sure you're holding your legs. Like, because it can be slippery and you can fall. Like I know several guys who have had sex in the shower and like with someone and like the woman has fallen or passed out or hit her head or something. I didn't, menace have sex with someone and the girl actually passed out during. Yeah, in the shower.

And the shower. I have another friend of the same thing that happened to. So I just would be wary about that. Okay, let's move into some cute date ideas. These are some ideas that we think are cute dates for Valentine's Day. Okay? You, because we just talked about what's romantic and repulsive. We're talking about what the other media is saying.

But this is what we think. Okay, here's some ideas. A themed date. Go out as an 80s couple and make asses of yourself or have two person, two person prom at your house. Yeah, I mean, they're just, you know, like, maybe there's like an 80s drinking night or something like that.

Yeah, okay, I like it. How are you gonna make asses of yourself? Have you done this? I have not done this. Okay, just curious, just curious if this is something that you have practiced on. Comedy show, as long as it's not open my, get open my knits can be kind of a bummer.

But just because you never know what you're gonna get, but a comedy show can be fun. I always like going to comedy shows. You're never like, you know what you're gonna get, but a comedy show can be fun I always like going to comedy shows. You're never like you know you're gonna laugh at least once Hopefully comedy shows are cute go to a live music show Yeah, if you like the music if you guys both like the same bands or whatever Make a gift depends on your artistic skills if you don't think you're very artistic You can always do something cute with photos. I love photo gifts

I love like when guys make photo albums or photo collages or women make them for guys or whatever. What do you think about people who take pictures of themselves and give it to their partner? That is interesting. I think that's fine. I don't have a problem with that. Usually I think it's more that a couple takes pictures,

like maybe it's a picture of both of them. But I know a lot of women who've done these Boudoir photographs, or they're sexy photos. I really want to do one of those. I feel like I just want some kind of photography friend to be like, oh, just give you these pictures. And just like to have them. I have some.

I did it once. I can talk. I can hook you up. But my friend actually, he did a photo shoot for his girlfriend, and he got these boxer briefs and wrapped an American flag around himself, and we all took the pictures, it was actually kind of awkward, but that's cute. Yeah, I kept on, like, being like, I need to be at 60% like his boner. Oh It wouldn't look too powerful, but he gave it to her as a present. Yeah, and she won away to Germany. Oh

She was leaving the country. Yeah, so it was taking America with her. Okay. Oh That's cute. That's cute. I get it now the America the flag. That's cute at first I was like really and I think you need like Photoshop skills though or like a good camera and nothing nothing like amateur for that exactly okay Going to the place you first met revisiting your first date highlighting your inside jokes. I like that I love the romanticism of going back to the place that you first met When you first met when you first when you first fell in love your first day, that's cute. That's right. What if you were like blacked out drunk, though?

Um, if you go back to the bar, go back to the bar, go back to the bar bathroom, go back to the bar, try not to bar and get blacked out, but go back to the same bar. How's that? Fast food picnic, fast food in 40s. Oh yeah, that was was that may or may not have been my idea. It's the ironic Valentine's Day so it would be kind of for people who would have a sense of humor about it. I would not recommend it for most people but the idea of like packing like a really cute picnic but having it be something like in and out you both really love like a certain like fast food restaurant or cheap food or like Chinese food or something like that and You know creating like this romantic like dinner around something that's like just you know, right, okay

You're not into it are you you want to I don't want fast food. I'd never want fast food So I'd not that into it But if you like fast food and that's your thing then you can make it cute. You can put, get some in out burgers and put them on a nice plate and eat it or something. Yeah, I mean it's probably not good advice though. I could see this backfiring. I could see the whole thing.

These like candles, like surrounding some McDonald's burgers. I know. Should be like in and out again, like really. Yeah, maybe not. Okay. Escape the crowds, go to a place in the city not many people know about don't tell them exactly where you're going and surprise them with a cool spot with an amazing view I think that's a great

idea every town has that every no matter where you live there must be somewhere that you've been dying to go or someplace off the beaten track I know I've lived in San Francisco for a really long time and there's lots of places I've never been that I that I would like to go to and I would just be, okay, the bottom line here is you want the man, the woman or the whoever you're with to have a plan. Just have a plan and be decisive if I plan over the,

well, I was thinking we could in an out burger maybe we could dress in the 80s or maybe we could do canvas paint. No, pick one idea and like throw yourself into it wholeheartedly and she or he will feel very good that you made the plan and that you stuck to it and that you had a decisive idea. So I like, I like that idea of going to a place that not many people know about it. Do you like that? Yeah, I love that. I think to like if somebody grew up in an area, they know it really well and I don't know. There's always little places that maybe they've been attached to. They have nostalgia for.

And bringing someone to your special, like, hidden, or your special thinking place, or something like that can be really special. Exactly. I like it. Okay. Here's some, should we end this now? We've got it about, yeah. Okay, because we're doing a little Valentine's Day tips all week, but here's a deal. Okay, sex ideas, oh no, no, let's get into sex games. We'll do that tomorrow. Tomorrow we're gonna give you some sex tips,

some sex ideas, but oh, sex ideas, slow sex versus rough sex, but then we wanted to get into that. Okay, got it. Make slow romantic love. Okay, so people always ask me what my number one sex tip is. People like watching number one sex tip for men, for women. I always say slow down. Especially for men, everything that you're doing, do it five times slower.

Just try that. I think that really works. Get kinky, play out a fantasy or dabble in some BDSM. This is a great night. Valentine's Day is to try one thing differently. I'm sure you've been with them on. If you're celebrating Valentine's Day with them, you've probably been with them for a while. And you've been having sex.

Maybe it's amazing rockin' bangin' sex, but what can you do that's different? So maybe you can get kinky play a fantasy, you can time up, time down, do whatever you want. For some bondage, you can get the sexy slave kit from AdamNive.com, which is so awesome. It includes restraints, chords, provides leeway for games you want to play, bind, blindfold, and a red feather tickler. So it's kind of like you don't even have to think about it. You just go to adamanief.com. Here's a deal with Adam and Eve.

There's such an awesome sex toy store online. You get 50% of one item. You get the free Kim Kardashian Sex DVD, a free mystery gift, and free shipping. you just put cute coupon code Emily at check out So you can get this sexy slave bondage kit from Adam and Eve and This Kim Kardashian DVD and a mystery gift and free shipping. I love the free shipping. I Love the Kim Kardashian DVD love mystery gift who knows? I still haven't seen the Kim Kardashian DVD. I know we should order something from them.

Let's have them send it to us. So it's not too late and you can still order today. It's Wednesday, you still got some time. Okay, buy your partner's sex toy like the rabbit or a pocket rocket. So you everyone knows the rabbit, right? The rabbit has been around for a long time. It's sort of the most infamous sex toy.

I bet all those robbers are breaking into stores and stealing rabbits too, but or a pocket rocket, a long time. It's sort of the most infamous exploit. I bet all those robbers are breaking into stores and stealing rabbits too, but or a pocket rocket. A pocket rocket. So if your lover has never had a vibrator before, pocket rocket is still one of my favorites. I think I have one of my purse for some reason. It's a little vibrator that's for for clitoral stimulation. They're like 15, 20 bucks and you can get them and they're a great start of

vibrator. They come in pink. We add them in you've sent us one that's pink that we have. Whatever, whatever color you want and they're really powerful and they're great to use during intercourse for clitoral stimulation. And finally, you can also buy him or her a sea ring or a cock ring,

a bongo cock ring from Adam and Eve as well as a screaming out. So the reasons why we love these rings are because they help men stay harder longer because it restricts the blood flow. And they also have now made these cock rings with vibrating, with vibrators on them. Little many vibrators that hit the woman's clitoris while you're having sex. It's like a win-win for all. I'd recommend that.

I still have one of those lying around my room and I can't find it. You've been using it? The bongo one. I haven't used it because it's somewhere in my room and I have to find it. We'll have to get you another one. So these are some Valentine's tips for everyone.

We just wanted you to make sure that you are getting your right, your head space down and you're right, you're in a right mind for Valentine's Day. And whether, hopefully, you're doing romantic things and our repulsive things, and just're right, you're head space down and you're right, you're in a right mind for Valentine's Day. And whether, you know, hopefully you're doing romantic things and not repulsive things. And just be creative, be yourself. And don't stress about it too much as long as your heart felt.

And you are doing something that feels good and from your heart and what you want. I think you'll have a good Valentine's Day. Sounds good to me. I hate Valentine's Day. Why? It's just lame. It's a landmark holiday. I do like the vagina monologues. I hate Valentine's Day. Why? It's just lame. I like our holiday.

I do like the vagina monologues. I think anyone should try and find somewhere that's doing the vagina monologues because it's really positive. It is for men too, huh? Yeah, a bunch of guys will be like, oh, I'm not gonna go to that and then I have guy friends who do

and they're like, that changed my life. Yeah, the vagina monologues is awesome. I think that's a great idea. I think you know that on the bottom. of Monologues is awesome. I think that's a great idea. I think you know that on about it. Yeah, that's a great idea too. The Giant of Monologues, I'm sure they have in the city that you are at somewhere, some communities theater might be putting it on. Okay, remember, you can still win stuff at Sex with Emily.

So go to sexathomely.com, follow us on Facebook and Twitter, sex with Emily. Thanks everyone for listening to the show. Was it good for you? Email me. Feedback at sexwithemely.com. sex with Emily. Thanks everyone for listening to the show. Was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithamily.com.