Sex With Emily - SWE: Sexually Confident Woman

Episode Date: October 9, 2013

Are you a sexually confident woman... or man? If you aren't instantly seducing men and women with your piercing eyes and sly smile, this podcast is for you! I'm going to transform you into a Sex God(dess). First, I give advice to a woman who wants to try S&M (Sadomasochism). I'll teach you how to be the dominant or submissive, and how to talk to your partner about trying S&M. The next time you have tea and crumpets with your partner, I want you to look them in the eye and say, "bend me over the table and F*@% me." Or you can take a more subtle approach, explained in the podcast. You'll be tied up and spanked in no time! Next, I'll share how guys can keep an erection! Hint. It involves putting a ring on it. Make no mistake, marriage will not solve your sex problems, but a vibrating ring just might! The show ends with ten ways women can be more sexually confident. Here's a few tips, ladies: 1. You should dance naked in front of the mirror a lot. Learn to love your body. 2. If he doesn't want to see you naked, he wouldn't try and take your clothes off. He's having sex with you because he thinks you're attractive. Own it. 3. The more pleasure you experience during sex, the better you will be at sex. True confidence comes from focusing on your own sexual experience, and not just making sure he's satisfied. 4. Give him directions! Someone has to teach these guys what's what. If it doesn't work out between the two of you, you'll be doing the next woman he dates a favor. 5. Don't fake orgasms. A truly confident woman will genuinely express her pleasure. Make him keep trying until he gives you a real orgasm.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi, I'm Emily from Sex with Emily. Good vibrations carries the hottest toys and vibes. I love the Jeju Mimi because it's discreet yet powerful and great for couple sex. Find out how much pleasure your body can really handle. Use coupon code Emily for 15% off with vibes that come. Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man of spiced by sex. Eyes that block our sacred institutions.

Betrumaise they call them a bi-gon. Hey, Emily, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. Hey, girls got a hair stand. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common, Avaline? What do you mean, like, laundry? It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me?

Oh my god, I'm so, so, so, so. Being bad feels pretty good. You know, Avaline's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so my god, I'm so proud. Being bad feels pretty good. But you know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between for more information go to sexwithemily.com where you should right now, sign up for a mailing list and you will get a free report the five biggest mistakes you're making about for men and for women.

But you'll also receive emails with special offers, amazing tips, and there's so much great stuff happening on the sax family website that you want to be a part of it. If you want to improve your sax life, it's all I'm saying. I'm here with the menace in San Francisco. The menace. The menace. Well, you know what I'm saying. The menace.

You are the menace. There is no other menace. How are you doing? I'm good. How are you? I'm very excited. Tell me why why we are doing shows in here together I know it's just been amazing if listeners like that tweet us uh sex of Emily and menace me and ACE so what's going on um I'm my life is good just hanging out in a San Francisco for few days which is kind of like coming back to visit reminded me of

kind of like visiting an ex-boyfriend that you broke up amicably, but things are fine. You didn't like, you didn't cheat on you. And I didn't, you know, nothing bad. I didn't like, you know, pull a buddy boiler on or anything, but. Has your SF friends moved on from you?

Do they even keep in touch at all since you have moved to LA? Yes, I have amazing friends. They have? Yeah. What? They call up and what do you guys talk about? You know, check, because I read everything.

I came in from my friend's birthday. That's why I'm here and I ended up staying extra-raised work with you. We talk about boning. Yeah. We talk about their relationships. Women talk a lot about relationships. That's how we talk about it.

Why do you like talking on the phone so much? I know. Why do women like talking on the phone? Yeah. That's why texting was born for men. I'm convinced. I just think that that's how we connect. Women, it's harder just to connect with a friend over text.

You need to like make the time, talk on the phone. We talk about our feelings, our emotions, our struggles. Women like, it's so funny because so many women connect over the things that are like struggles for them. Not like, things are amazing. And my job's so great. It's like, oh, he didn't text me back. What do I do?

And what do I say? He cheated on me or whatever it is in their lives. My mom. Or my, what, your mom wants to talk about that. My mom can talk on the phone forever. And I know she's very disappointed that she didn't have a daughter because I can't talk on the phone with my mother more than like five minutes.

Right, you don't talk to anyone, you don't even talk on the phone. Yeah. It's crazy. How, and then this talk to anyone, you don't even talk on the phone. Yeah. And it's crazy. How, and then this is the thing that bugs the hell out of me, is my mom can talk on the phone for hours, my whole entire life, and she does not believe in call waiting,

she thinks it's rude. So she's a busy signal? Oh, just busy signal, forever for hours. I can be like, I didn't even know they made busy signals anymore. Yeah, when I was, when I was younger, a teenager, I could be like stranded somewhere and I would have to wait hours

before the phone line was free. That's hard. Was she thinking little menace needs me? Needs to, I need to be a morade. And she would get upset saying, why didn't you call? I'm like, I try to call. She looked like a chronic,

so what was she on the phone talking about? I don't know what she talks about. That's why you hate the phone and why you hate women because your mother was on the phone and you had to listen to her Prattalon all day long I don't know even know what she's talking about that's why my grandmother can talk on the phone that long and I feel bad I think that's why why you won't talk about this crazy because when I was 13 years old my grandmother you you know, in the Bay area we have a bunch of bridges and my grandmother lived on one side of the bridge and we lived on the other side of the bridge in like two different cities. And then my mom decided when I was 13 that she wanted to move

into the city that my grandmother lived in. And my grandmother already lived there for over 10 years and the month that we were moving in, my grandmother moved out. Seriously? Like, because I think my grandmother would think like my mom would to drive her crazy and like, wanna hang out all the time. This is a tense why men is hate's women, okay? No, stop that.

No, I do think it's that menace. We've psychoanalyzed you on the air. No, we have. No, you always tried to pin it on my mother, but it's not my mother. I can laugh at that kind of stuff. No, but I'm saying it has some deep rooted. You heard your mother talking all the time.

She was there for you. No, my hatred for women comes from another source. She came to town. It probably came in like my late, not late 20s, maybe early 20s. A dissimilar. You paid women ever since I met you when you're early 20s, didn't I? Yeah, no mid 20s.

You know, I mean my mid 20s. But probably like my early 20s, didn't I yeah no mid 20s you mean my mid 20s I'm like my early 20s. It's just like I don't know. I maybe I'm just jealous on you know Women say it's so hard for women, you know, it is Right, they say it extremely hard, but sorry, but like in the environment that I that I'm around It's actually actually me easy for women. In what sense? In entertainment that I work in. Why is it easier for women? I don't know, but they just seem to move up a lot faster than men do. The highest paid person in my industry is a woman. In radio? In radio and I'm not going to talk about okay okay so but how is a woman how are stern he pickets like satellite

radios a totally different okay but the also in like television who's the highest paid person Oprah Oprah okay so how is how are women struggling really you can oh my god. Are you serious? Do you know much money? Women make two a man's dollar still? Not as much. Men make way more money. It is still a white man's world in many ways. I feel like I'm so glad that I'm in my environment. I am women. It's only you. Radio is a boy's network. I think women found out in the past like 15, 20 years that they have a

vagina. And they really been using it lately The women's vagina the reason why men even have power with the pendulum is swung back from the early times Early the early days. I think the women has wholly taken back women women because men are trying to repress women's sexual power The vagina is a very powerful thing mother earth the whole thing And I think that man forever trying to like stop women's sexual energy. And now women are like realizing, yeah, we got vaginas and we rule the world and we're gonna use them. Yeah, I totally, I totally agree with you. Yeah. I'm sorry. Why, why you, why do you have to hate women? If you can't beat them, join them. That means you gotta go down on women more.

But the thing is I'm not gonna be, you need to perform moral sex. You need to honor the vagina. The thing is I'm not gonna bend over and be the Superman type. I'm like, I'm gonna. Why don't you bend over a little and penetrate you and ask with a dildo? She's a chick and I wanna get laid. And I'll do anything that she says. I'm not one of those type of guys.

I don't give a f. I know you're not. I don't think you are. I just think that. I hate guys like that. I don't like that you're so angry about men who do do. But there's women, but there is women that realize that That they can just get guys to do whatever they want and those are the women type those are the type I just like right so

When you say I dislike women you're trying to you're trying to say that right that small portion of women that I'm talking about Has to do with every single woman on the planet. And it doesn't. Okay. Then you just need to identify which women you hate. And you know, I'm not trying to pigeonhole me all the time. I'm not trying to pigeonhole to you. I just think that you're trying to put me in a box. Or not a woman lover. You're trying to keep me down.

I'm not trying to keep you down. You're trying to generalize everything I say. So not true. But I'm glad that you're talking about how hard it is for men in this world, which I don't disagree with. I think there's challenges being a woman and a man. We all have individual challenges, but I don't disagree with. I think if there's challenges being a woman, and a man, we all have individual challenges, but I embrace my femininity, I'm glad I'm a woman.

I think I can be, you know, honor myself and use my looks and my brains to get whatever I want, and my vagina, if I need to. Not that I ever slept my way anywhere, maybe to the bottom at one point, but I slept my way to the bottom, not to the top. So the read today's show, we're gonna be talking about 10 ways that men can be more confident in bed.

We're also, oh, sorry. We're doing a show that says 10 ways women, oh God, can you just, yeah, let's go. Okay, you can remember at this, okay, but I'm saying it's because we are doing it. Today's show is about 10 ways women can be more confident in bed. Okay.

Because you're saying that, you know, I'm saying the women still have it hard sometimes and man have it hard because I always say that cultivating confidence is the most important thing you need to do if you want to be in a healthy relationship, if you want to have a healthy sex life. It's all about confidence. And the problem is when you say that to someone, healthy confidence, you have to have confidence, feel like, what do you mean? I'm like, well, you just kind of love yourself and blah, and I've given, it's all about confidence. And the problem is, when you say that to someone, healthy confidence, you have to have confidence, they're like, what do you mean? I'm like, well, you just kind of love yourself and blah blah.

And I've given, I've talked about this over the years many times, but today we're giving you specific examples as women. And then later on, we're gonna be doing a show in the next week about ways men can be more confident and bad, because I want to help everyone. Because confidence is, don't you think a woman who is confident is what is attractive to you?

Not cocky, not, you know, she wants to whatever manipulate you, but a woman who's confident. Do you don't you find confidence sexy? Or maybe you don't. I shouldn't even assume anything with you. Do I find women confident sexy? Confident just meaning that they're not always asking you how they look, like if they're always worried you how they look,

like if they're always worried about how they look or things like that, I like that where I don't even have to hear about it, but not to the point where they just, like really snarky type, super confident, this very sarcastic type of chicks, I'm not into that kind of stuff. You're not into that at all,

not into the chicks who are like here, like they're always talking about themselves. They're talking about how, you know, tough they are and bad ass they are, like I'm not into that at all. Okay, so I do, I do like, get you a Vanigo for you. Yeah, I do like the women that are confident enough

that they're not worried about how they look and stuff that, that's awesome. They naturally are just beautiful and confident. Confident with the looks. I'm actually beautiful, but they actually feel confident in their own skin. Yes. Right.

Okay. I think that also, yes, I know what you're saying. You don't want a woman who spends more time in front of the mirror and is always late for things and because she's crawling her hair or whatever. Does it have a crazy waiting for women? Yes. Can't date women.

I couldn't have had a guy who took longer than me to get ready. And I get ready very quick. I wanted those chicks out the door in 15 minutes. I was like, well, I've got that going for me. Like if guys are like, are you high maintenance? I'm like, no, I'm not a high maintenance woman. Do you think I am?

I'm not, but we've never dated. But I'm really not. OK. Anyway, so we're going to get to that. You just talk too much. I do talk a lot. Well, it's a due for living. So I'm also going to read in your emails

that you sent to feedback at sexwithemily.com. And I also have to say that I have a new line of products called from Emily and Tony dot com that are all about confidence. And I will give you an example. There are three products. One is a massage candle, which you can use in your partner to spice up your relationship. One is a lubricant, personally, lubricant. It's amazing. They're all like vegan and feel good, friendly, the best stuff you've ever tried. And then this ball ocean for men, right? Called Down Under, which I gave you some. Now, the story is is that my friend who,

I've told, he was, he's teaching boot camp I told you in New York. And the reason why I gave him some ball oceans because he said he always feels sweaty and he's going out of date and he's like, I feel bad because I'm not confident or whatever. Like I don't know why, but I have like this chronic sweating problem. Like we'll just try this ball stuff I just got. He's like, because I always have to like, sometimes feel bad because I'm not confident, or whatever, I don't know why, but I have this chronic sweating problem.

I'm like, well, just try this ball stuff I just got. He's like, because I always have to, so instead of chance to shower, and it's a thing, because I was telling him my product. And he's been teaching for 15 years in New York, ran around, it was like a 95 degree date in New York. He put it on his balls, it's a cream that turns to powder, it smells amazing, and he's like,

I did not sweat for the first time, and I felt fresh and clean. When, he's like, yo, Emily, I swear to God, my balls have never not swept before. Like, he freaked out. So, it's cool, it's Emily and Tony to God, my balls have never not swept before. Like he freaked out. So it's cool, it's Emily and Tony.com, check it out. And you'll like it, because I made it, especially for you guys.

I posted that on Instagram about a week and a two ago. And the people were already saying good things about it. I know, it is really good stuff. So you gotta check that, that is all about confidence. And I appreciate if you love me, then you'll love my products. Okay, we can get into some emails from the people. Yeah, I love hearing from you at feedback at sexualalme.com.

Dear Emily, I've been listening to your podcast for a long time. Thailand loves you guys. Thailand. We're gonna go. Shut out to Thailand. We are going to go everywhere and finalists, and there's one day in the bus.

I love the advice you give, and I've been trying some of the tips that you give. They work are working pretty well for me. I finally have a fixed relationship with the sky. I'm assuming that means committed. However, I want to take my sexual life to the next level. I want to try SNM really bad. My question is how do I introduce this idea to my partner and I want to go slowly and step by step. Please help me with your awesome advice. SNM girl from Thailand. That's my guy, our name. Okay. So SNM, for those of you who don't know is a little SNM

is a little say-do-masochism, little bondage, just plan say-do-masochism, little dominant, and submissive, it's basically dominant, being dominant, and being submissive. So first you have to choose, I would just tell them that you have this fantasy that really turns you on, maybe you want to be dominant. I'm gonna assume that you want to be dominant. A lot of times women, you just tell me, I have this fantasy that really turns you on, maybe you want to be dominant. I'm gonna assume that you want to be dominant.

A lot of times women, you just tell me, I have this fantasy that I think would be really cool if maybe some time you would blindfold me or you would rat my arms and your neck tires. I just do something that I'm not saying has to be aggressive or me, because you just want to block off one of your senses and just tell me you think it would be cool.

I'm trying to explain to everyone what it is also. But and establish you want to be the dominant or the submissive, and then you could take turns switching between the roles. So if your partner says that they want you to be dominant, you'd be competent and confident and decisive about what you're doing. So you'd be like, you, even if you don't know,

you're like, I don't know what she means. And my girlfriend wants me to be dominant. Just be like, you know, blindfolded. I'm telling you, start with the blindfold, tie her hands or tell her what to do. Or gently, you know, push her down on the bed. You know, don't be too hard to aggressive at first, but do something little.

You know what I'm saying? As much as the eyes are really big right now. No, it's, you know, there's been so many stories in the news where women just make so much money just doing this because- I know, Dominic tricks, right? Guys just want to much money. Just do. I know. Dominatrix, right? Guys just want to be dominant.

And there's not even sex involved. I know a lot of times it's when we peed on. Yeah. Another email about that coming up. It's true. Oh my God. Remember, years ago, you had that dominatrix girl that you were going to school with? Yes.

And she pees on. Dr. Emel Morris. Dr. Emel. Dr. Emel. Dr. Emle Morens. Dr. Emle, I'm a doctor. Yeah. You never mentioned that enough. I forgot. Dr. Emle. Dr. Emle Morens.

I do. So we were in sexual, we interviewed a dominatrix and she said that she peed in guys' mouths. Yeah. For sure. I knew a lot of them and I actually know some very, very wealthy men because everyone tells you other sex life who pay professional dominatrix and they are like, I just want to be like, I want to be tormented. I want to be, yeah, they want to be peed on. They want to be kicked.

They want to be, you know, they want to wear a diaper. They want to do all these things that, that, you know, it's because I think it's a lot of men who have control and power in every other era of their life. And then in other areas of life, they just, they just want to like go and be dominated. Not me. Not you, Mattness, not you at all. Or more power to you if you can fight through that, that pee in the mouth. I know. It's really, it's a really interesting thing that a lot of men and women get into.

So yeah, if you want to be a dominant, you can do that too. That's true. But make sure you know how to remove the bondage before you put it on. These are the tips for the dominant. So you really, I love bondage tape. It's my favorite thing. I know you're in Thailand, S&M girl, but bondage tape is my favorite thing. You can get it at good vibes, use coupon code Emily and get any sex to what you want there. Okay, tips for submissives, okay? If you want to be the submissive one,

be clear to your partner the kind of bondage you want and expect how much struggle and attempt to escape you want, how much you want that to be prevented. So, you know, and you need to say forward, it's not always easy for the dominance to know how the bondage feels. So, if there's potential problems, pinch skin, comfort, discomfort, you have to let them know.

So, the most important thing is just communicating it. So, I think the first thing you have to do is so easy here, S&M girl from Thailand to just tell them that you're interested in it. I just wanted to give some tips for people, but just say, I think it'd be really cool one day if you did this for me. If you, you know, I think blindfolding is the great way to start.

Tie your arms, tie your arms together and blindfold. I like it. Yeah. Not your thing, man. What was that one that tie, tie stuff that you liked? You'd always talk about it. Tie what? There's like some straps from some company. Um, sports sheets.

They make ties. Um, what kind of, I don't know. Sports sheets, it's really cool too. Some bondage ties or something like that. You like them. They were like in hot pink or something. Oh, I don't remember. I've had so many sex sets. We've been doing it so long, but it's really cool.

You can go, again, go to goodvibes.com, put in, you know, put in bondage, whatever you can get a lot of cool beginner kits and practice. And again, it just goes back to communication. Yeah. Okay. So Emily, dear Emily, I'm 42 years old and male and in the best shape of my life. I have three women that I'm sexually active with. I sometimes have sex three times a day for up to three hours at a time. My problem is I can't reach climax. Also sometimes I cannot sustain an erection for the whole time. It is there when I start, but it goes away in about 10 to 20 minutes into intercourse and sometimes before during four play.

I've tried to masturbate and I still could not ejaculate any ideas why Tom. Maybe because you're banging three women in one day. That could be it. You gave me a mask. I mean, he never reaches climax, which is probably why you're having a lot of sex. You gave me a mask. You're gonna have it. I mean the problem, but he never reaches climax Which is probably why you're having a lot of stuff So you have the first one. I can imagine like the second You know and the third you might have trouble, but the first one So I think he's suffering delayed ejaculation, but it sounds like it's not only delayed ejaculation

It's like no ejaculation So he isn't his 40s and so men in their 40s and older are much more likely to lose their erection during intercourse. So the next time see your doctor talked him about any of these problems you might have, I would also you need to, are you on any medication? Do you take drugs? Are you do you smoke pot? Do you drink a lot? Like what is there anything that any medication you're talking to, take any medication that you're taking?

You just first thing get checked out by the doctor because I can't diagnose you, but there is something probably going on there. You could also incorporate a penis ring into your sex life. They can help you keep interaction and ejaculate sooner because now so many of them have pleasurable vibrations. And the best, okay, the best one that I love, you know that I love Jeju.

I always talk about Jeju, J-E-J-O-U-E products, and they're fefie and they're meme-ee vibrators for women, but they also have this cock ring, penis ring called the Mio, M-I-O. It's rechargeable, stretchy, has multiple vibration panners and a really sleek, cool design. I love this one and it can help a lot of men,

because the vibration, it is for women, so women can have orgasms, these vibrating rings, you put on your penis and you become a human vibrator. However, the vibrations feel great to a lot of men. So that might be the thing, a time that gets you over the edge, but it sounds like if you're having sex three times a day for three hours a time and you're still not climaxing, try the ring, but I think there might be something

else going on here. And I would talk to your doctor for sure. What's it called again, the ring? It's the Mio Mio. Go to good vibes.com. Use coupon code Emily for 15% off any of those rings. Cause they're amazing. Mio, like Mio, M or me, though, there's a great drink. Me, though. Yeah, me, though. I don't know. Have you heard of it? No.

It's like, you know, it's just putting in your water. It's like, you know, I don't know the stuff. It's just drinking water. It's at the grocery store, but I don't know. Okay, good. I'll go to the grocery store and check it out for sure. Okay, so let's get into, okay, we want more email before we get into our topic, which is how women can be more confident about now. This is also for men. If you realize some of

these things that we're talking about, you could be like, you could help your partner perhaps get the confidence that she needs. And we're also going to be doing a show later about men being more confident about. Okay, so dear Emily, long time listener here, found your show and played it on my in my barracks room while stationed overseas. I love our listeners who are serving this fair country. Rumi loved it and soon the whole platoon was in on it. Then I introduced them to Kaggle Camp and we turned it into a competition. The episode about confidence was a huge life-changer.

It was an awkward, I was an awkward panda bear, no more. I can approach any woman I like and know that I'm the star of my own movie I'm not the extra anymore Some other topics you can talk about is lasting longer. Do you know about body-hardening? Striking nerves to dampen feeling. Well, what would you think about flicking the head of the penis to slightly dampen feeling? I haven't tried but maybe there's some science band at number two talking to women I took what you said about pretending you're talking to a friend instead of a cute female and put a little spin on it I talk to every girl pretending that she's a lesbian.

This makes it easier to talk to them and I have no fear of rejection. Yeah. Thanks, Jordan. Jordan, that is so awesome. I'm so glad you love the show. Thank you for serving our country. And let me go back to Kaggle Camp. It is an iPhone app that I have that helps men and women strengthen their PC muscles.

It helps men have stronger orgasms, stay harder longer. It's amazing. It's five minutes a day. It pops up. It reminds you of your exercises. It's the peace-stopping muscles, whatever download Kaggle Camp, you'll love it.

More men are using it than women, which I find really funny because I thought it'd be more women. So if you want to do think hard, you start about lasting longer, that is a huge issue for men, premature ejaculation. So flicking the head of the pain and strain sex is distracting and can be painful, I think.

So if you're orgasming sooner than you want, you can try promising. Promescent is amazing and I talk about it all the time because it's the only FDA-proof treatment for lasting longer in bed. It's a desensitizing spray that lets you still enjoy the sensation of sex that will not transfer to your partner. So check out for me, I think that you would love that and Jordan thanks for the other topics. I'll definitely, and I love that they're keep writing me. I would love you to tell me that everyone in your back is what their questions are because I will answer you guys

because I think it's awesome Jordan where you're doing. I'll put your emails at the top. Feedback at sexandalmy.com. Okay, let's get into our topic which is women becoming confident in bed. All right. What do you think is the biggest insecurity? Like, do you, biggest insecurities women have in, which is women becoming confident. Bad. All right. What do you think is the biggest insecurity? Like do you, bigoted securities that women have in bed, if you have to say one, it's always wait.

They think that right, but are you really looking at, do you really think, oh, she's so fat? No. Tell them that. The talk of women listening that you're not saying that. No man on this planet is not going to sleep with you because they think that you look fat when you're naked. I'm sorry. Exactly. Right. And that's not why you're going to break out with it. Right. They're not looking at it. You think your butt breast is bigger than your right breast and that you think that like you're you know that you've got this weird

shaky new thing and whatever it is. Your back has back fat. You're not noticing that. Not noticing that. I mean, maybe a little acne problem. Where, on the back. On the back might be a little. Okay, we can take care of that. You can exfoliate. Use some kind of... Yeah, yeah. Just, you know.

Do some women of acne that you notice so, God, now you're making on to care. Yeah. Ah, no, not that I know. Okay, but you know that might gross you out. Yeah, that might gross me out. Okay. That might, you know, kill the bone.

Well, there is an amazing... There is a way, what? Be a bone or killer. Well, one of the most powerful stories and I'd love to have this woman on the show, that she, I saw her thing on Huffington Post. She had sex with her husband every day for 365 days. So you know, we always talk about like the 30-day sex challenge and couples should have sex every day for 30 days. She won't up to it. Did you see this? Two times. I heard about it. Yeah. So it was amazing. 365 days. She, and the reason why she didn't, she realized her husband was making a joke at how it got prompted was because she was like, he's like, I haven't seen you naked

in like, they'd been together like 10 years. She's like, I haven't seen you naked in like three months. Like the last time I saw you naked, I saw like your toe. And she was like, oh, it's because she was feeling insecure since the baby and she didn't love her body. So every day, 365 days and what she said was that she really started to love her body and feel confident and get into the, it wasn't always easy, but she got into loving sex because it was her body image and her issues that were holding her back. So number one, I would say, for women to become more confident about is to have sex. So the reason why people women who are inexperienced, the reasons they don't feel confident in bed is because they haven't really had a lot of sex. So the reason why people women who are inexperienced, the reasons they don't feel confident in bed is because they haven't really had a lot of sex. So it's normal if you

have an adult sex to feel inexperienced. But the only way to have it is to just, you know, when you start having sex with someone. So make sure that when you have actually experiencing sex with someone, that you're open to trying new things. So don't keep having sex the same way again and expect that you're going to be with a guy that's going to initiate everything. So try jumping on top, try leaning back that you're going to be with a guy that's going to initiate everything. So try jumping on top, try leaning back while you're on top of him. You know, see what feels good to you and to him because once you find your groove, you will feel more confident. And once you know how to have an orgasm with him or if you know how to, you know, move, you'll feel confident.

So just maybe every time you have a sex, do one thing that you're initiating in your brain that you want to do. Just go with it. Don't think about it, just do it. Or cook a mistake dinner. And then what does that do for a sex lunch? It gets them really horny. It gets them horny or it gets them just tired, right? Doesn't have big steak dinner make you kind of tired.

Yeah, but still, I mean, I gotta, I gotta please the lady that made it for me. Right, that's true. But we're talking about her. Don't you appreciate when a woman takes initiative and climbs on top? Yes. Not when I'm super tired though. But when you're tired, you don't want her on top because then you're lying on your

back. Yeah, when I'm tired, I don't even want to do anything at all. Oh, that's true when you're tired, you don't do any sex. He doesn't do the sex. Not me though, but I'm sure 99.9% of the men on the planet will fight on through. Right. Exactly. Okay. Number two, this could be one, too. This is neck and neck. This is how how how to be more confident, bet, know your own body. So many women don't know what makes them feel good.

They expect that a man's going to figure it out. They masturbate the same exact way every time. And they don't really know how to transfer what makes them feel good when they're masturbating into sex, sexual intercourse, so know your own body, and know how to communicate with your partner. If you don't know your body and you've never had an orgasm, and you're not really sure, then start touching yourself,

start playing with yourself, devote time every night, 10 minutes, whatever it is, to just start touching yourself and it feels good. Buy a vibrator. That's a great fast track to an orgasm. There are orgasms in a box. The Tachi Magic Wand. Tachi Magic Wand.

It's no longer called a Tachi. It's just the magic wand. It's new and approved. It is the Cadillac of all vibrators. You plug it into the wall and I believe me you will have an orgasm. Is it still made by a Tachi? No, it's no longer made by a Tachi. But I have one.

They sent me the new one. It's even better. Do you know what's crazy? Tell me everything, man. It's what's crazy. So you know, Brookstone, I mean, for people that are living, they're listening outside of America. They probably don't know what a Brookstone is.

But it's like this little like technology store that has like massage chairs and are like, I bought like a projector there and things like that. But then they had this like tiny section. They're supposed massagers, but they totally look like sex toys. Yeah. That's probably probably our. And this, yeah, I think they are. Yeah. Right. Right. They totally look like a, and this, when I went there, this lady in her husband, she was like holding up the biggest one

and talking with the salesperson of like about what it was, or she thought it was like a back massage. Like they're probably saying it's just a massageer. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, yeah, but no, she knew what it was. She knew why was she talking to the person? You think she would just be like, I'm taking this. Try to see how long the power went.

But seriously, if you're with so much of the orgasm, try that, talk to you again. I'm wanted to say go to goodvibes.com. It's use coupon code Emily. You get 15% of orders every time I talk about vibrators. I gotta say you gotta go there because that's where you gotta buy your stuff. That's all I'm saying, great discounts.

Okay, so apply that knowledge that you learn from your body when you're having sex. Have them rob your clitoris or rob your own clitoris during sex and if the sex version that you're in doesn't provide you enough clitorol stimulation, a lot of it doesn't, then you got to move. Then you got to use your hands. The more pleasure you experience during sex, the better you will be at sex. You will get into it more, move it pleasure, instead of just going through the motions. You've been with chicks who just go through the motions, correct?

Yes. And how is that for you? Fine. What is you talking about? We're talking about women, the women side, though. I know. What doesn't matter how I feel. It really doesn't matter where you feel. OK, don't let your past experiences ruin sex for you now.

Many women have had bad sexual experiences. But it doesn't mean that your present situation has to be as to fall asleep and be just like your bad one. So focus on what you're doing in the moment and don't let any person said to you in the past bring you down about your body, your performance. This is now or if you had a bad experience growing up some kind of childhood trauma, then you need to go to therapy and work on that. Because if you set that if you did experience some kind of trauma

childhood, some abuse of any kind, that might be, that might be coming up in your sex life currently and as soon you go to therapy and work on these issues, the better your sex life will be. Because they don't go away. Have you been with women who have experienced trauma? I feel like you have. Yeah, I have.

Over there. But I mean, yeah, it didn't really hurt sexually, her relationship was. Right. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. But sexually, her relationship was. Right. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. But it can also impact them, actually.

You might have not paid attention, but she probably had some issues. I mean, she might have had some issues. I want my penis abused daily, but that's about it. That's about it. Right, just a musical abusement, this is penis. Okay. You can learn from the past, however. So you might have had a bad past experience, but you can learn from it.

For example, okay. I'm a friend. So I have a friend and she does not like one night stands. She realized that whenever she hooks up with someone or she, you know, doesn't mean, you know, a lot of times you don't know as we have one night stand, but eventually, you know, whatever I have it, she hooks up with a guy just once or twice or she's not that into him, she always feels bad. Every time she's like, I feel bad, like, do I have AIDS?

What's a problem? Because maybe she didn't use protection like you need to. But she just makes her feel bad about herself. So this is what I'm saying is you can learn from your past. You're going to feel more confident and comfortable in your life and your sex life if you're happy with the choices that you're making about your sexual partners. So if you don't like one-on-sans, do it about a-on-sans. If you don't like certain things in bed, don't be with that.

Don't do it. Certain guys you don't like. Don't sleep with them. Don't sleep with their acts anymore if it makes you feel bad. Yeah, but you know, I can't really control women. They're- I'm just telling you if you- They're impulsive, don't you think? Yeah, so I'm- I know.

And I used to always sleep with my acts, but it made me feel good. Yeah. Because I'm a dude, because I liked it, and then I didn't have to be in a relationship with anymore, because I've sexed them. But some see me with their ex, for example, is problematic. Okay, for women, this is huge. Tips that have to be more confident in bed is don't be afraid to initiate sex. Number one complaint I hear from men all the time is my partner will not initiate sex. Or she doesn't do it enough or she's never done it.

So if you want to feel an appear more confident when it comes to sex, you just gotta start initiating it. Take control of the situation and it will make you feel you'll be more bold and you'll feel more confident. And just, you know, when you walks in the door or whatever it is, start kissing, I'm start, right? Who, what man doesn't want the blowjob when he walks in the door?

Yes. Every man wants that. It can just be like when you're sitting on the couch and you don't want the blowjob. Yeah, I know. But I feel like I've said that so many times, but it's so true do every man want that it can just be like when you're sitting on the couch No, no, no, no, the blowjob. Yeah, I know but I feel like I said that so many times But it's so true that every man would love and never it can happen though How hard is it for you to get up from your laptop when you're by walks in the door Whatever you're doing at home watching TV turn off the housewives and turn on game blowjob

He just liked or start initiating sex you have to give him blowjob if you don't want to do a blowjob Preach it sister preach right give guys blowjob. Preach it, sister. Preach it. Right. Give guys a blowjob. No, I'm saying or just start kissing him. Just start letting it be known that you want to sex. Think about what he does. You do that to him. So that's a big one.

When you say that if a woman just said that, baby, you don't want guys or always thinking about it, they're all like that. They got to initiate. They got to bring it up. And then just if a woman does it, and I think it'll again make you feel more confident, like you're in charge. Another thing women can do is to give directions to guys. So many women don't give guys directions.

They're worried about bruising guys, ego, their word that it might make them feel like they're too knowledgeable about sex or they seem slutty. I don't know what it is, but someone has to tell them what to do. Guys cannot figure it out on their own. So you're doing a favor for yourself. And every other woman who gets in touch with this man,

lead his hand to where you want him to touch you and tell him what you want him to do. He will be turned on by your confidence and the direction you're giving him. So you must know, if you're like, I don't know, but it just feels good, whatever he's doing. No, think about it. Like what really feels good?

Like do you tell him like, wow, like there is ever like touching the left side of your breast and then he stops, you're it. Like, what really feels good? Like, do you tell him, like, wow, like, there is even like touching the left side of your breasts and then he stops, you're like, damn, I wish you'd go back that felt really good. Tell him. Tell him. Is there anything he's never, you know, he's never kisses your neck, for example,

and you really want your neck kissed, tell him that. Not, it's not complicated. Is it, how hard is that? Baby, I love the way you kiss my lips, kiss my neck, kiss me right here, that's so hot. And then you get all turned on, and well, doesn't he like that, right? Yeah. Who's happy?

Everyone's happy in that situation. No. Why? No, no, no, everyone is. Everyone is happy. I don't want to disagree with that. No, so just tell him, I'm just one woman to be more confident in bed. Yeah.

Okay, don't fake orgasms. Studies came out that women like, you know, 52% of all women have fake orgasms, and I think the rest of them are lying. I think that all women have fake at some point in their life. And this is giving men the wrong idea. They think what they're doing is working. They think everything they're doing is fine, and it's not. So having confidence is taking control of your own pleasure and be honest.

And don't fake it. Just tell me, you know, it's not getting me there. I need this to happen for me to have an orgasm. Or I actually have never had orgasm during an, of course, why don't we mutually masturbate? Why don't I masturbate and you masturbate and I'll show you what I do and then you learn each other's bodies, but don't fake an orgasm. Because so many guys walk around thinking, oh, I gave him orgasm doing this and I'm a fucking man. You're the only woman who does an orgasm. I love the guys who say that. You're the first one I've been with, whoever in an orgasm, you know what, they've lied to him. There's no way that every woman

you've been with dude has had an orgasm and didn't lie. It's true. They need like a cement truck to get an orgasm. Who does? I know, it's true. They need just a cement truck. Yeah. What does that mean?

They need a power plant. I thought a magic wand. By right now. A magic wand. Time's time. You know, powered by nuclear power. It's true. It's so true.

And the stars have to be lined and it has to be all this stuff. So I know women's tough. Body and securities. If you didn't, we started out by nuclear power. It's true. It's so true. And the stars have to be lined and it has to be all this stuff. So I know women, it's tough. Body insecurities. If we didn't, we started out by saying this, if this is one of your insecurities women, if he did not want to see your naked body, he would not have tried to address you. He's attracted to you.

If you feel insecure about your body, try focusing on how you feel in the moment rather than how you look. If you're like, oh no, my ass, my ass looks really fat. Oh, I hate my underwear. Just think about, wow, this feels good. I'm getting turned on. Like, channel what you are feeling

and those insecurities are not feelings. Those are insecurities. That's different. Touch, feel about, think about the sensations and what it feels like when it's hands or moving down your body. The more you try to hide parts of your body, the more it will draw attention to it.

So embrace your body and enjoy the experience at confident your own skin, even if you are not there yet. You can even try when you're alone, walking around naked, walking on your room, start feeling more comfortable in the nude. And there was this really funny thing that my friend years ago told me this that you know those, he called it the crab, oh god, I was like, I think it was the crab walk that women, when they got it better and they don't want you to see their ass, they like walk sideways and backwards towards with their butt, the bathroom because they get up and they,

have you ever seen that? The woman who like walks like a crab so you can't see her butt. Does that make sense? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he's like, she did the crab walk and then they're looking at you because you're walking funny, like a crab and he's like, oh, she doesn't want me to look at her ass. I better look at her ass.

So like, just be confident. It's beautiful. He wanted to sexual do. Love yourself. Love your body. Yeah, you'll be fine. Okay. So that's what you got for you today.

And I want to thank everyone for listening to Sex Family. I want everyone to go to Emily and Tony.com by your partner. A beautiful, amazing massage candle that smells so great. You can use it as body lotion and that's at EmilyToni.com. And thanks, Menace, for being here. Thank you. Download the Stitcher app. Stitcher is a app that you can download

for your smartphone or your tablet or you can just go to Stitcher.com, search sex, and then sex to Emily will pop right up. You don't have to download at B3s. You can just stream the show directly wherever you go. I'm obsessed with Stitcher app. This is good. I love it. Okay, thanks everyone for listening to Sex with Emily was it good for you? Email me feedback at sexwithamlee.com. I'm Emily from sexwithamlee.com. Crazygirlproducts.com carries unique

fair-boned infused products that make you feel sexy and confident. I'm crazy about their want to be naked shave cream. It's made perfectly for your more intimate areas. No shave bumps or ingrown hairs. Use coupon code Emily25 for 25% off at crazygirlproducts.com.