Sex With Emily - SWE: What Men & Women Want

Episode Date: March 7, 2013

1,000 women tell you what they want in bed. Emily breaks down men and women’s biggest sex insecurities and the single most important thing to them during sex. Emily tells you what they want and how to give it to them. In other news, Emily edits all her friend’s sexts before they send them and shares how to cultivate good sextiquette. Then she explains what happens to your brain when you orgasm and how to date people you actually want to be with. Emily also answers listeners emails about complimenting women, troubles ejaculating during oral sex, and how to get your wife to listen to Sex with Emily. Please support our sponsors: Max4Men, Masque, and Good Vibrations Use coupon code Emily25 at checkout for 25% off your purchase at Max4Men Use coupon code GVEmily20 at checkout for 20% off purchases of $100 or more at Good Vibrations Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I Look into his eyes Then the eyes of a man obsessed by sex Eyes that mark our sacred institutions Betrubized they call them in a fight on me. Hey, Emily You got a boyfriend because my man E here. He just got his heart broken. He thinks you're kind of cute The girls got a hair stand. Oh my the The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean like laundry?

It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm off here so... Oh, god. Being bad feels pretty good. You know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. Listen guys, I know beards and stubble are back in style these days, but so is man-scaping. So get your act together down there, if you're into that kind of thing.

And if you are cleaning up your man-for-us, it's absolutely essential that you take care of your skin. That's why Max4MEN has a whole line of male shaving products that you can use all over your body, even your face. They make shave cream, after-shape balms, and colognes that not only smell great in condition your hair and skin, but are pheromone infused so you get that extra dash of sex appeal. So if you want to look sharper and increase that natural magnetism of yours, check out max4MEN.com. That's the number four and support the people who help keep sex with Emily free. Thanks for listening.

You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between. For more information about sex with Emily, go to sexwithemily.com where you can listen to our podcast, sign up for our mailing list, and all that fun stuff. Facebook and Twitter, you can find me at Sex with Emily and also you can check out my new app, Kegel Camp. It's been again great reviews. It's for men and women. It is the most important sex exercise you are not doing. So today's show we've got, you will be reading your emails that you sent to feedback at sexwithemily.com. Some of the topics include complimenting women, oral sex, erection issues,

undressing women and fantasizing during sex. We also have sex in the news and some sex tips, a thousand women tell us what works and what doesn't in bed. So we're gonna have a study that shows what women really want, what you guys are doing right and what you're doing wrong, and men answer to. And I'm here with Metis. Hi, how you you guys are doing right, and what you are doing wrong, and men answer too. And I'm here with Metis. Hi, how you doing?

I'm good, how are you? A thousand women, eh? A thousand women. A thousand wrong answers. A thousand wrong, exactly, that's nice, Metis, Joe. Yeah, so how's your day? My day is good. It's been on good.

It's spilled something on your camera. I'm really, really upset. What happened? I love my Flip video camera, and I was racing here to get to the studio, and I threw my stupid water bottle with a loose cap in my purse, and it got my Flip video camera and I was racing here to get to the studio and I threw my stupid water bottle with a loose cap in my purse and it got my Flip video submerged in water and I love my flip. I just wait for it to dry. I think you'll be okay. I don't promise it's gonna work but I believe Do you have a Flip video that you don't like that I can have? I gave it away. Oh, man. Yeah, I don't really like it too much But if there's a camera that you need, I do have spare ones.

You do? Yeah. Okay, cool. So I feel better now. So that's what happened. And then also what happened is, so the guy that I lost my virginity too. Yeah. When I was 17.

Your friends with them on Facebook. All the sun, yesterday. Yeah. He became my friend on Facebook. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. How do I know? My own reason. It was just bizarre. It was like, I haven't heard from him in like 20 years maybe,

and 18, I don't know. And it was just weird to see his name pop up. And it's like, he probably doesn't know what I'm doing. He's like, sexual, I'm like, oh, I took that girl's word in me. I don't know what he's thinking. He's still living in Michigan. Is he married or is he divorced now?

He's not married. Not married. Yeah, he was kind of an independent spirit. I don't know. Yeah, but that was kind of a weird thing, like to see his name pop up after all these years. And such an intimate thing, like the person who leaves your virginity to, I thought that was kind of a big deal for a minute. Yeah.

Now, I'm moved on to other things. No, weirdo. Yeah. You're thinking. I'm thinking weirdo. No, why is he weird if he's my friend? How are you doing? What's up?

Oh, good. You know what? Speaking about weird things, okay now let me ask you a question It's gonna be a couple parts that my story that I'm gonna get in a talk right now No one do you think like when a guy talks to you every single time he's hitting on you? No or does if he does something nice He's hitting on you. No. I feel one that feel that. I don't know. Okay. I know what? Let me tell you a story Okay, so the other day I'm seeing the studio Before I get here I do a morning show and then I do another show so I'm in I'm in a control studio forever And the other day I was like I do a lot of commercials and there's a staff of people who sell me to companies for me to do their commercials for them and One of the like top people that would sell me, she left the company, right?

Because she wanted a better job. And I was kind of upset and I was like, damn, because she made me a lot of money. Right. And, uh... Men just makes money, by the way, I don't. Yeah, but I work for a different company. Okay. Anyways, so, uh, every year, at the end of the year,

all the people that really worked hard for me, I get them a gift. And it said, thank you for selling me all year, and blah blah, and it was great. And next year, next year. But she left before that happened. So then I hit her up, and I was like, oh, what's your new address?

Because I want to get you something. Because I got everybody else something. It would just be fair. I lost the address. So then I forget about it forever. And then I decide, oh, you know what? I'm just going to center some flowers. So I center some flowers the other day.

I go, when are you going to come back? OK? Right. And it's super weird, because I sent that. and then I get a text message the other day when I'm doing the show here like all I got flowers are beautiful blah blah. I'm like okay cool. I'm happy you got them and then that was it. There was no more text messages. So when I get back to the office I'm like oh I'm going to check Facebook to see if you know she'd wrote anything cool. She edited her Facebook so it's like limited so I can barely

I can't see anything Okay, I was like that's kind of weird. How do you know she did it just to you people sometimes edit their Facebook? Yeah, but isn't that just weird within the same day where I was just seeing it that morning That's how I got the information so I can send her the flowers right right and then I get back like after a few hours after she got The flowers blocked you because you sent her flowers? I don't know, but she checked us out. So then she didn't text me at all, right? That day after I said, oh good, you got the flowers? Until 11.30 that night, she sent me a photo of the flowers in her house. That's nice.

And then, but I didn't respond because I'm asleep. So the next day I was like, oh, I go, oh, those look really nice. You know, sorry, I didn't respond. I was asleep. And then nothing. And still nothing. Okay. But I just think that she thinks that I'm like hitting on her. I just wanted to get a flowers. I doubted. Is she someone even that you guys ever have a Yeah, it's a course. You have a thing before. Huh? Yeah, of course we've had sex before. Oh, you're not going to send a girl flowers that I have not sex with. Yeah, but I'm just. I'm not gonna send a girl flowers that I haven't had sex before. Yeah, but I'm just saying I'm not trying to get with it.

Is that one of the sales reps? What? I'm, I do know. I'd, uh, I'm getting that as double. See, this is such about how we're going to be live now because when you say stuff, you can't take it back. I can't take it back. You've slept with one under someone. I, I slept with somebody.

Yeah. How did that work with? I didn't want to back you've slept with one of someone I slept with somebody. Yeah, how did that I worked with that? I didn't want to get very well too late So we slept with her once why need to understand? Yeah, but like no, we're like cool after that A hundred years ago. Just like I don't know a year ago. Okay, you slept with her and then you send her flowers And then yeah, but no, but I've never like I but we've been like cool after that We never like I never like pursued her like after that like other ones. Yeah, but we've never like, I, but we've been like cool after that. We never like, I never like, pursue her like after that. Like, oh, yeah, but we've always like been cool.

Right. Yeah, we've been cool. And I never like, hey, you know, we want to go out on a date or anything like that. I've never done that. Well, I'm sure she just said, I mean, I don't know. I don't know if it's just a glitch thing in Facebook, but I think it's very suspicious that why would that happen? I don't know she likes who doesn't like menist I don't yeah, but I don't know and then like go there right now

You're not blind anymore the text messages that I get from her is like odd hours versus the time that I text or two People I do that all the time Yeah, and I and I sometimes I respond to all my texts from the day because I'm so busy sometimes I have no time so then I'll be in bed at 11.30 and I'll respond to everyone. Yeah, but the thing is, I don't want her to thinking like, oh, he's trying to get with me right now. You know, that's why he's like sending me five or so. Why would you do that?

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I doubt, honey, I think you're over-loan. So then she thinks I'm a creep and then she's blocking me on Facebook. But she already knows you, honey. If she thought you were a creep,

she'd already know you were a creep by now. Okay. Most people can figure that out when they already know you were creeped by now. Okay. Mostly we'll configure that out when they meet you. So that's my situation. Okay. I don't think that that's... I'm gonna be, I'm gonna learn to tell stories better. One of these days, I thought people... That's great story, but no, that's a great story.

But what I think is that you said to her, when you're coming back, could I could see how that could be interpreted like, I miss you when I want you to come back? But did you say thank you in the card? I said, when are you coming back? I don't know because I had to tell this guy on the phone. On the phone, the florist, yeah.

I tried to do it online so I could just type it myself in the site crashed. Oh, hate that. So then I had a call to a guy to see if I already ordered it. But let's go back to the notion that you think that every time you're nice to a woman, she thinks that you're hitting on. No, that's the one I'm asking you.

Yeah, I don't think so. I used to think, I think maybe in my youth, I thought that maybe they were hitting on me, like in my 20s, but I don't think so. I used to think, I think maybe in my youth I thought that, and maybe they were hitting on me like in my 20s, but I don't assume that every guy who's nice wants to, he wants to bone me, not necessarily. No. Wants to get down.

He wants to get down. I don't think so. I think that some do, and maybe like in the recess of their mind, they're like, oh yeah, I would banger, but I'm not going to, you know, I don't know, but I think a lot of things are motivated by sex. Like probably I get more doors open for me and more, you know, more things given to me and more favors in life, maybe because I am a woman,

but I don't know if it's all because directly because they want to bone me. They want to bone you. I'm just kidding. Yeah. I don't, yeah, so I don't know. I just feel weird now. Oh, you know, I was just trying to do something cool. You could I should send more flowers and say hey I just want to verify that I'm not trying to get at you

I'm not gonna email it. That's okay Yeah, no, I don't care. I don't care, but I just want to see what your opinion was that was my opinion is that I don't think that it's anything weird I'm never gonna call her a text or anything like that and say, hey, yeah, she's like, oh, menace, all of a sudden really likes me. So he sent me flowers. You were like, when you coming back? I personally would have said, thank you for all your work,

because that was the point of the flowers. It was a thank you present. So I might have said, thanks for everything. When you coming back, ha ha, question. Yeah, I was in rush. I could have edited it for you. Just let me know. People do that all the time.

Do you know my friends always pass their texts by me? I've told it talked about this before, but they're like, should I send this? Should I send that? My best friend before she sends an email to her by her text, she passes the by me. Because I think I'm really good at sexting and texting. Wait, the sexting?

They run by sexting. Yeah. No way. Like what? So what should I tell her? Wait, the sexting thing, the run by sexting. Yeah. No way. Yeah, right. So what, she's like, should I tell her that I can still feel five loads of his stuff inside me after we had sex five times last night.

No way. I think, yeah. Should I send him that? Like, I have friends who were like sending naked pictures all the time. And what did you rewrite? Because that would have been an awesome text. Would you like to get that?

Did you tone it down? And I don't sext. I did. I was like, that might might freak them out because they just started dating. She's like, but we had sex five times and he came inside me and now I have five loads of his ejaculate inside me. She's like, I'm a text from that. I'm like, I think he would have enjoyed that. So okay, who do you think has to start a second? PSI am on the pill. That's, you would have to, like, put that after. She is on the pill, yeah.

And they've been dating for a while. Or shall send pictures of, just, you know, her naked, which are beautiful. I've seen these pictures of her, like, she looks great. I'm like, wow, that's so hot. Or shall just pass by me, like, should I say this? Should I say that? And then I edit their emails or their texts.

So wait, do you like downplay it? Tell me how you revert the five deliveries. I was just a little harsh. Okay, here's the thing. I think it's like dirty talk. Sexing is not something that you just break. I think there's something called, I made this up actually, premature cyber-fection. And I think if you prematurely are cyberly, like showing affection to someone,

like, hey babe, or hey, your comms inside me, or have you want to say something like this is a little too early. And I think that technology definitely decreases the time that you, it speeds up relationships, right? There's more intimacy through texting and you can get it going and all that stuff. So I think it was just a little too soon. There was like the first time she's up together and she was going to send him a 30-tax. So I was like, I'm not, I would ease into it more. Not like that was a graphic text. Like I've got five loads of your stuff inside me.

I just thought- I was thinking I was some classy ladies. I definitely think the word cock gets used a lot more in texting. Really? Yeah, then it does in real life. Like as in I want to suck. Yeah, or do you like? I need to work.

Yeah, and then suck like that. Do you like this chocolate video? Yeah, no, what if you will say that? No, I think that I'm a little more conservative when it comes to that, but it's funny because like the guys I've been dating, I never really sucks. I have phone sacks, but I don't sex that much.

I never send a negative shirt. Yeah, you never put in print. Never put in print. I don't, and I don't sex that much. I never send a nigger shirts. You never put in print. Never put in print. I don't, and I don't send naked photos. I mean, I guess you can send them without your head, so then no one could really say they were you. Oh, that's not really me. But that's a lot of work.

Yeah. When am I going to like stand? And that's stupid. I want to see your head. Right. Yeah. Right. But that's what I see most of the time.

Do you have a lot of girls send you Unica picks? Uh, not anymore. What do you mean? That is kind of just like whatever. Right, but to turn you on, what was the best sex you ever got? You know? The best... I think the best ones are like, I really want to... I'm sorry, I'm trying to keep it still clean when I'm talking to her.

I know, we still try to keep it clean. Like, I want to hook up with you. I really want to have sex with you right now I think those are the best ones. You don't have to get really like to description You're like I've been thinking about you Yeah, or like if you if you set like a time and destination, too It's like cool like I really want to have sex with you, you know tonight tonight like right after you get off work Or something like that's not I think that's a's a good one yeah because then it also that's probably to but you know if you want to be like your friend and you know with

the whole five delivery things that's cool too you know i'm not knocking that i'm the same you do not have to ease up to it you do these up to it i was like whoa whoa maybe after your dating for a month but she's hilarious we were you said they your dating for a month, but she's hilarious. For a month? Wait, wait, you said they're dating for a while. No, but this is the very beginning. That was an example sex from the beginning. And the beginning, she was setting that stuff.

She wanted to. I told her not to. Oh, is she a porn star? What? No. I'm like thinking. No, she's not a porn star, but she's just sexual and she likes to sex.

She doesn't like that she hates the phone. She never talks on the phone. So since she never talks on the phone, she has to do everything through text. So she literally hates the phone won't answer. Like barely talks to me. I hate that. I hate talking.

I like talking on the phone versus texting. I know. You know what I love about you, menace, among so many other things. I love about you. So you always answer the phone. You're the kind of last person on the planet planet because I don't get like people like all I don't know that number like and they won't pick it up Is your phone gonna explode in your hand like what really is gonna happen to you if you I don't answer number now

Obviously somebody is trying to get a hold of you Like literally someone I don't want to talk to if I don't have a number then they leave a message You're like all that somebody I have to get a hold of then you have the call them back and then sometimes you can't get a hold of them just pick up the phone nothing's gonna happen to you seriously seriously like whenever you call me from that weird number from where I pick up now yeah I'm like oh that's that familiar weird number it must be menace this might I just appreciate that be answered but I think the whole phone thing in relationships are so interesting now because people really don't

they don't use the phone as much as they used to like they don't even like they don't ever I guess fear log into this relationship maybe because people really don't, they don't use the phone as much as they used to. Like they don't even like, they don't ever, I guess if you're logged into this relationship maybe, but you really don't, you really don't use the phone. It's all taxing the whole world. I know, I don't like it. Why? I'll tell you secret because I can't spell for crap. So that's why I don't want to write anything.

I just want to talk on the phone and just get over with. That's why I know every single person in the building I work at is because I never email anybody. Everyone talks to email. No one knows who anyone is. So I ask them to be like, oh, hey, who's such and such? I'm like, I don't know because they talk to them through email every day, but they don't even know where they sit. So you just go over to their desk and you're like, I just go to the next. Yeah. I know every single person in my building within every like five floors. That's great. Yeah. That's why you're so, so good at what you do. Thank you.

That's why you're invaluable. People, people person. Your people person, your people please are, don't you think? Okay, anything else that I need to know? What is today, today's Wednesday, right? Today's Wednesday, it's almost the weekend, it's in the middle. It's Memorial Day coming up.

Oh yeah. I didn't even know I have no plans. I feel like I should do something fabulous. They just walked in today and say hey by the way you have Monday off. You're like thanks. It's really good. Oh okay. I'm gonna go well if you still can't find anybody to work I'll work. I want to do really? Yeah. You hate days off. Yeah I don't like I like working. You can work for me on Monday. Okay. Okay perfect you work. What on your work? Okay I don't know something. No. I need your help with some technical stuff. What? What's going on? Okay. First, I have a television going on. Okay. I was going to admit. I have an admission to make. Yeah. And I need to talk this out. All right. I have not turned on the TV since you left my house.

I'm scared of it and I don't have time. I just haven't really... That's such a waste. You got it. Can I tell you something? Just turn on the background. My television watching muscles have an atrophy. I have not watched them in so many years that I actually, it's not in my DNA right now. It's not it puts up part of my being, my world, to be like, oh, now's the time to go flip on the TV. Like I forget that I have it.

Like I have to do it and I'm afraid that I won't remember how to turn it on because you said there were so two remote. Yeah. Like I have to do it and I'm afraid that I won't remember how to turn it on because you said there were so two emotes. Yeah. And I don't remember. I need to come back and then I need you to set up a wireless printer in my office at some point. A wireless printer.

In my office. But that's about it. Okay. But no, really, I really want you to watch TV. To watch TV. To watch TV so we can talk about so many other things. Yeah. And we're going to be on TV.

And we're going to be on TV. You're going to have to know. I can't talk about that on that. But I'm telling you all that we are going gonna be on TV and we're gonna be on TV. You're gonna have to I can't talk about that on that but I'm telling you all that I am gonna we are gonna be on TV So but let's go let's talk about movies because before the show started we were talking about how we need to go see Passes and you know, but sometimes I go to Pixar and I can't take a guest So how's the hangover the hangover was good I don't say I wouldn't recommend not seeing it but I still am really hung up on bridesmaids. I thought it was hilarious. Okay I want to go see that. I really got to go see a bunch of

movies. You should. Yeah I should get out of the house and stop working. Yes get out the house experience. That's where I came up with all the best radio topics is when I'll just go I Don't do it anymore, but I should it's just go. I'll sit on public transit And I'll keep a notebook and I'll just like observe people and then I go those you hate it when such and such Right does this or this you know other people that stand too long to like put their change in the machine Like why didn't you get your change? Outside when you're waiting for the bus for like an hour. Like why did you wait till the moment when you had to put the change in to reaching your pocket and count it out? Like, does that make any sense at all? No. What is it? I take notes throughout

the day. I do. I get that. You're right. Yeah, but it's mostly just like my own things. Mostly it's what's going on in my brain, but it's not what's going on in your brain. Oh my God. I've got a lot going on in my brain. I just have a lot. We have a lot going on. The new website stuff is really exciting. And I just really hope that people tune in and subscribe. Five days a week. It's exciting. It's my dream.

This is my dream. Five days a week. That's what I'll ever want. So it's exciting. If I think about it, I want it to go. I want it to go. I want everyone to be happy and like it. I'm really excited that sexwellemely.com is actually just,

you know, it's information is going to change on there every single day. I know for the past couple years at it hasn't been like that last couple years has been like i posted a podcast yet but that's all you can change it's like interactive you can chat and the message board i will have chats like once a week while be chatting with you and i'll be answering your emails like directly if you remember and it's exciting yes can change but you know what i just remember something, the story you were telling me. What happened with the seven foot guy and the other guy came and see blocked you.

What was going on with that? What happened with the seven foot guy? He didn't ask me out. What? How could he do that? I don't know. I don't know what happened. We were going to go out and then he was like, yeah, maybe we'll get lunch.

And I was like, yeah. And then because of the guy that she walked you I don't think so I think it's because maybe he wasn't that into me what I know it's weird never having me for me so I'm kind of like wow did that really happen so there's nothing with that guy and there's nothing with the blind date the other night and I'm still seeing the guy you know that I've been seeing yeah last night was just birthday and I went to his birthday party how's that it was fun I saw his friends are really cool I love his birthday and I went to his birthday party. How was that? It was fun. I saw his friends.

They're really cool. I love his friends. But a lot of his friends that I never met were like, oh, you're only so nice. I've heard so much about you. So I was like, oh, that's nice. You know, like, it's friends, you know, that I know it was fun. It was awesome. He's a great guy.

Robby friends forever. Robby friends. We will. I know that we will be. Oh, speaking about tall guys, I just read on my text message. I'll set it up on your phone too where I get e news alerts on like, you know, what's breaking news and what they consider breaking news because it believe me it's not mpr and still another necklace or something uh... kinda yeah kinda like that but uh... Kim Kardashian apparently just got engaged to her man yet i don't know if you see her man no with this guy ice he literally is probably like sent

seven i'd read this guy is like six nine or something ridiculously tall wow that's how but yeah they're they only been dating three what could be this is just a consistent to getting married after three months Yeah, they're, they only been dating three, six months. Okay, this is just consistent too,

getting married after three months. Why do people, what is the need? I don't understand like maybe it's like young love. Getting married after three months is just a mistake. Always, you should like, what's the rush? Can't you date someone for a while? You ever see things, you know, Kim Kardashian can't get her own reality show by herself.

So what she needs to do is get married. Oh, it'll be fun. And then she has. And then it's Kim having a baby. That's what her sister did, Chloe. Like Chloe got married to Lamar, who plays for the Lakers. And then so that's how she got her own shows because she got married.

So, she's still getting off a reality show. No, I don't think so, but I know her mom. No, no, the guy she dates kind of look alike. Like, doesn't she like sport athletes? They also do. She dates always athletes. I've never. She did date one musician.

That's who she did the porno tape. Oh, right, right, right. The porno tape was launched her career. I should have done a porno tape years ago No, that's what all my for guy friends were telling me when I started texting them either like just get naked on your website. I'm like Don't think I'm gonna do that. No, you still haven't still holding out to not get naked on the website But what these guys are paying she might in my Some scampy clothes. Yeah, you can watch me. You can watch me right now actually right so uh... exactly i'll do that

and uh... yeah what else in the pop culture news that i need to know well uh... they do you know who still hasn't filed for divorce yet is uh... rea shiver which rivered because apparently she's hired an investigator to like find out all the dirt like all the dirt she wants to know that there's anymore kids everybody that he's hooked up with and it's gonna be which I don't really understand because in California doesn't she automatically get half like why does she want

to know all this dirt I don't know the bigger case I don't think she'll get anymore money would she? I think like to to show emotional hardship. Maybe there's other things that you could have. She gets half of everything in this state. I think. Can they add more penalties if they find out, yes, two more kids? I don't know. Maybe it's just to guilt him into giving more, doing more.

It's got to do with something. Why would she? It's just for her own personal. I don't know. But mean, it's got to do with something fight. Why would she, just for her own personal reason? I don't know. But apparently she was the one that leaked the story to the news. Oh, Maria. Yeah.

I would, okay, it's interesting. Like, I think I would want to know everything. Just because I'm one of the hardest prizes. I wouldn't, I don't think it's be that hard. I think all these women are going to come out and start talking about honor, tors, and anger, and how they slept with them and whatever. For sure. It's not going to be that hard.

They haven't come out already. If he was doing that, they're starting to really there's no way this is an isolated incident is home with one. Oh, yeah, because it's been going on for and I bet she felt so stupid because when he was running for governor, that stuff's trying to like trying to come out. There were allegations. So she went on Oprah and said, you know, no, this is true

Well, apparently men and power I think it was interesting with our guest yesterday We were talking about how men and power her view on that was that she wrote a blog post about it that Certain men with money and power feel entitled to cheat on their wives because they take care of them. They're the breadwinner, they're the sole caretaker, and they feel like, really, this is my, I take care of you, it is my duty and my right to have sex with someone else. I don't know if I totally agree, but I would be- That's her philosophy.

I would definitely be upset if I did all that, then my wife is like not having sex with me or You know, you would never do it. You're too nice of a guy. Yeah, I won't I wouldn't even when you make a million to millions of dollars No, I want to cheat. I'm not down for that. You're not a cheater. I'm a reformed cheater as we know. Yeah, yeah I cheated in my past How do you mean how did it work? How do you go about doing that? When you're, your man is trying to get a hold of you. You just didn't pick up the phone? Yeah, and I was traveling a lot of times.

I was, and this was in my 20s, like, and usually it was the end of the relationship. And if I cheated, I would end it soon after. Like, you always say if you want to cheat, you should just break up. But they never found out. And it was always like an isolated incident like I was at a film festival and I met some guy and we'd hook up. But it feels bad, it doesn't feel very good and I just decided that I'm not going to commit to anyone if I want to be with other people.

So that's why I really haven't committed lately so I don't cheat. But she'll commit to you if you subscribe to the podcast. Yes, I will commit to all my subscribers. Literally, this is like how much joy I love that all the subscribers are now we're going to be able to interact more. We'll be able to do chats. Yeah, I'm going to definitely, it's going to take a little bit because I have to, I'm your engineer.

And so I have to figure out how to wire all this crap all the time. I know. So I just have to figure out how to wire all this crap all the time. I know. So I just have to figure out the phone system and how we're going to be able to hear them through our headphones and all that stuff. That's why you're so good. I know, right? So should we move into the effects in the news?

Yes, do it. Okay. Secrets of the Female Orgasm Revealed. Scientists discover new hope for women who can't climax. Scientists have discovered the female orgasm leads to altered state of consciousness that could help the minority of women who can't climax. Brain scans of women were taken while they were orgasming. I can't imagine having a brain scan, I can imagine orgasming first of all in front of

scientists. But it's estimated that one and four women in the U.S. have had difficulty achieving orgasm in the past year, while between 5% and 10% of women suffer from an orgasm and cannot climax at all. It's hoped that by allowing women with an orgasm to watch their brain activity in real time, they'll be able to train their brain to copy the same activity of women. So it's like, basically brain scans. I think this was done at the University of Michigan. And yeah, brain scans of women take in while they orgasm.

If they watch theirself and their brains will be able to orgasm somehow somehow somehow somehow some way if you watch the brain if you're in their brains there's an author they're saying that when you've an orgasm your brain alters at state of consciousness. Yeah. So we did these brain scans and they showed the women what happens in their brains and something about watching that it's going to help them with their health. They're looking at their own brain scans. Yeah, that's what it says. It says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says it says of the women who are orgasming and how there's a, I don't, I mean, I'm whatever. The point is, is that a lot of women can't orgasm. So there's a magic.

If you went on to the Adam and Eve website and you typed in, you know, sex toys and then you go, oh, at home, bring scan kit. No, that could not, that could be the next thing. That could be the next thing. I love when they study female orgasms. Because a lot of research today, it's all about men's dysfunctions and not female. It's true. And so when you hear a study about they're studying the female orgasm.

Because a lot of women, one in four, is a lot of women who can't achieve orgasm. And only 30% of women can have orgasm actually during intercourse, which bombs men out across the world. But that's just how it is that's why you sex toys and that's why or all sex is amazing important for women which is weird to me because i think that uh... scientists would be on it you know they're like i want to figure out how to give them orgasm and right away well does it took me using because i get so easy to study mail

orgasm like by i got that's why by i was developed because for men it's not as emotional but for women it's not as emotional. But for women it's much more complicated. You can't just take a pill and have an orgasm. It's not like we can get a protrude. Your clitoris gets slightly in suiled when you take some kind of medications. But for women it's the body-mind connection. They can't quite mimic that in a pill yet.

So we're not going to get a pill anytime soon. They've been trying. They've been to get us our own female Viagra. I just say has some tequila. Yeah, this is awesome. Awesome, right? We need to get a tequila sponsor in here. Let's do it. Have some shots. We'll have a tequila Friday. Tequila Fridays. I love it. Okay. You're not as kinky as you think. A massive internet study finds that were all sexual deviance. How about that? Okay.

According to a new study, a billion wicked thoughts. Sex therapists haven't known which interests are common or rich or where. We probably know more than ever before. So there was a study that came out of all the search terms of people search for. Among the more surprising findings, straight men enjoy a wider variety of Arotica that imagined including sites devoted to elderly women and Transsexuals just like you Fruit fetishes aren't deviants men are evolutionary wire to look for small feet

Which are a sign of high estrogen production which itself is a sign of fertility So that's why men are foot fetishes partly What I know I'm interesting. Yeah, cuz they're at you know small feet It's been Chinese bound to feed, you know itself is a sign of fertility. So that's why men are foot fetishes partly. What? I know. Interesting. Yeah. Cause they're, you know, small feet. It's like you've been Chinese bound to feed, you know, yeah. But we've been, we've been asking forever for the, because you hear about foot

fetish all the time, you know, and we've been asking if any foot fetish people are out there. Yeah. We've got any mouse. Can you break it down? Why? Not because you love it. Not because you, you find it sexy. I want to know why you break it down why? Not because you love it. Not because you find it sexy. I want to know why you find it sexy. Okay, but this is a very interesting point. Did you hear this? If they're not adeviants that men are

have this is just an evolutionary biological perspective that they're wired men are wired to look for small feet because that's a sign of high estrogen production. That means that woman is small feet. She's lots of estrogen and that means that she's for a fertile and I want to have her baby. Yeah. Well, I... That's just one theory. Uh-huh.

Okay, gay men and straight men have nearly identical brains and their favorite body parts in order of preference line up exactly as chest, buttocks, and feet. Straight men prefer heavy women to thin ones. Straight women enjoy reading about and watching romances between two men it's not about the sex which is downplayed but the emotion which is the focus and straight men have a fascination with other men's penises which may be conscious or unconscious okay yeah you had you know did you even know that your obsessed with your roommates

penis you know i never want to check it out but let me let me go back to the foot thing uh... i never like look out for a woman's feet But I do notice when they're larger. Yeah Friends who are large feet and they're so conscious of it. Yeah, I Make sure my friend because it doesn't turn me off. I just notice it and it's hard to like Don't say anything to her what no no I make forever I go we can we can share the same she's yeah and then I put a you put it in

therapy for 10 years I put it on her shoes and I make a problem I don't put on her heels and I'm gonna say I'm not gonna secure about her feet already and then you brought it up oh she's super tall is this a she's not like short with big feet don't come I'm making making fun. I was just joking around, which is making fun.

But. And one of the studies says that the top 10 sex related searches are variations of these themes. Youth is 13.5%. Gay is 4.7%. Milf's number three at 4.3% breasts are 4%. The genus 2.8%, penis is 2.4%, cheerleaders 0.1%. How funny, these are all like the sex terms

that people search for. So basically this is saying the thesis is that there's no underlying sexual deviants. People who are attracted to mirrors or do beards are only get turned out to ants and their pants. These are cases that until now have been diagnosed by clinicians who have seen patients the internet gives us a far better sense. What people are into. So, foot fetishes, for example, are common across all cultures, it says.

I love studies out while people are searching for. I want to know what people are searching for all the time. I told you my friends that have the video site, which is not even an important site, is just, you know, so you can do streaming video. They said they like the tops search term was fisting. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, we were gonna do show him fisting Yeah, oh, that was the funniest that was the funniest thing ever we need to tell that story which one So you you were asking me like all week should we do this Show on fisting and we're gonna have a guest in and

do this show on Fisting and we're going to have a guest in and you know we kept on missing each other's calls and kept on it came to the day where we're supposed to do the show and they're like oh I have the guest coming in let me give you a call and I go now I'm in the studio I can't talk to you I'll see you then. So here it comes to elevator doors and you have a guy with you right and I And I was like, he's, you know, well dressed and he walks in with you. And tell like, we, it took like 20 minutes before we started the show and tell the microphones turned on and we're three minutes into the show. I totally thought that this guy was there to talk about this. I know.

And he was so not. He's the most conservative person. Yeah. And you thought, and all of a sudden you look at me you're like yeah I was like oh my god it's so funny that is hilarious yeah I was like so it's all about this fisting stuff so funny well we'll get into that another time okay women find happy men less sexually attractive did you know that?

A new study from the University of British Columbia exploring gender differences in the attractiveness of smiles shows that women find happy men much less sexually attractive than those who brood and look proud and powerful or even moody and ashamed, helping explain the stereotype of the bad boy. People always want to know why they like the bad boy. The study finds not surprisingly that men are just the opposite. Finding happy women more sexually attractive, well being less turned on by those who appear

proud and confident. So men are not into proud and confident. They just want happy women. Yeah, they want to have fun, happy women. But I'm proud and confident woman, but I'm happy. Yeah. Sometimes people want that, but I'm telling you. But women don't want happy men.

No, because they... I don't want happy men? No, because they... I do. I don't want to depress brooding, dude. You don't want a happy guy, because the happy guy is also the nice guy, and this is what's going to happen. You're not going to have anything to talk about with your girlfriends if he's not a dickhead. I would like to have a not a dickhead to talk to you. What are you talking about?

Like, you love sharing stories with your girlfriend, yes about? Like you love sharing stories with your your girlfriend. Yes or no? I love sharing stories with my girlfriend. Yes. And that's what we talk about as men, women and stuff. So when you have a boyfriend that's a dickhead, you have a lot of talk to talk about. You go out of that phase of dating dickheads. Well, I'm just saying I don't know what this study was for like the age groups. Right. But I'm just saying that's why a lot of women like dating the bad boy or the guy that's not as nice because they have a lot of crap to talk about with their girlfriend or sister. Do you think that's why we're only wired so women can talk about? Yes. This is what you love doing. Yes or no. We talk about so many other things. What do you talk

about that? Well, we talk about sex. Okay. Let's just take sex, relationships, and guys out there. We talk about friends, we talk about work, we talk about sometimes like shopping or clothes, but that's not what you talk about. Why is this so much it's hard for you to come up with what you talk about? I'm not. I'm like, talking about... Write down a conversation that you had that didn't involve sex, or a relationship, or a guy. Work? How's work going?

How's talk about our friends? Talk about... How long did that conversation last until you started talking about sex? Not that long. Usually we talk about sex and guys. What's going on? I'm still in so you're doing them. What's going on? Or someone's going through a breakup? I've got friends going through breakup. I don't thrive on drama. But here's one more thing I want to say about this study.

You find this on me out? No, I'm not. Yes, I am. The study involved over 1,000 participants. But here's what's so interesting. This is just like the last study. It's like evolutionarily speaking. Previous studies have suggested that what people find attractive

has been influenced by centuries of evolutionary and cultural forces. So those caveman values of protecting and providing for ones made in offspring, evolutionary theory suggests still attract females today. As manifested males displays a pride in applying status and competence. So they're still looking at the caveman who's kind of a dip,

like who's hard to wear, and that's why we're wearing a way. To look for the bad boys, because people always wonder, why do women like bad boys? So, okay, let's get into some of these. I mean, I would be a bad boy, but I have to be responsible and pay bills and have an apartment. You're not a bad boy, are you? Just like, no, because I don't want to be a loser, and it's because I know so many beautiful, awesome women that state losers. Yeah, I know, so do I. Are they deep in teeth them? Like, why? Why? That's so stupid.

Well, people love is blind and people are attracted to people for different reasons, different stages, and they're like, what? The more work you do on yourself, the more like emotional work, and the more you really like, there's a book that I love that I'm going to, I'm going to tout right now. If you're like confused by dating and you're like, keep dating the wrong people, first of all, if you're someone who keeps dating the wrong people, you can't look outside. You're like, why do all these men are attracted to me? It's because you put that out there. So there's this good book. It has little worksheet in it. Work thing. It's called, if the

booted dated. And I am into meditation and spiritual stuff, unbeknownst to you before and on whatever you say. No but but it's true that women uh... what was it saying now you're recommending the book it's the booted-a-data and it has you fill out all the stuff that you would want a partner enter write it down and i've no so many will have done this work and it makes you realize like this is what i want a person this is what i don't

want and then you'll no longer be attracted to those people because you'd be like he doesn't fit all these things. But I think when you're younger, you date the wrong people more so. I do think that. I keep saying that, but it's true. There's just more options. There's more. You're attracted sexually.

You have chemistry, but you don't look at all the other stuff. So you're having amazing sex for two months and then you look up and you're like, holy shit, there's that with this person's ox. So anyway, let's move into some emails. All right, what you got? What I got. OK, this one's on complimenting women. Emily, OK, this is about the disagreement

you and men has had over whether men should compliment women five to 10 times a day. So I don't agree with men as that it's a fantasy. Speaking for myself, I really enjoy complimenting women, but I think some women do things to shut this down. For example, man, hey, babe, your hair looks great. Woman, what? This mess?

I haven't done anything to it. Woman, oh you're just saying that because you have to, or even worse you might say, are you trying to get laid or something? Those kinds of responses really take the fun out of the compliment. I'm going to be less inclined to do it again. On the other hand, if I got this response when he says I like your hair, women playing with her hair a little bit, oh yeah, you like it. Thanks, Bay. Maybe I'll whip you in the face with the next time I'm on top of you. All right. Then I'm going to be a lot more inclined to shower with compliments because she's making it fun

and flirtatious. So I like your tip. I actually hope you're right. And I would just count that women, I would just counter that women who want to get compliment and more Need to be sure they're talking taking compliments gracefully and not turning them something negative That's from Marvin and Nashville, Tennessee. I love this awesome I bet it awesome email Marvin and I think that you're so right that women could be like oh no I'm fat Or if you guys like oh you look good. This is so typical of I think of women typically like oh you look great in those jeans You don't like my other jeans. You know what I mean? You like everything else I've done. So I think that women do do that.

So women should just say thank you. Women need to learn how to gracefully just say thank you when you get a compliment. Because I think women naturally feel uncomfortable with it. They're like, oh, this whole thing I got it for free. Or oh, I look like did you see my zit? Or you know, they like point out their negatives. They're not comfortable.

So just learn to say thank you, everyone. Just say thank you. You got to put good emails up on your new website. Mm. Not only am I putting emails on the website, but I'm also answering emails. I have a Q&A section. But yeah, I'll be putting up good emails on the website.

I like that. Sexwithmwe.com. We gotta start up because we don't really, I don't know, website enough, but we're all about the website. Like right now how you're like listening and iTunes and all that, like you could still do that, but now you can watch us on sexualfamily.com. There's a whole video.

So, HDCam. HDCam, we've got this video. It's crazy. Okay, E, love your show in your episodes and I checked out your iPhone app on my iPhone 4 and it's cool. That's my Kaggle Camp app. Question, I was with this woman for five years and she really enjoyed giving oral sex to me, but I could not reach a calculation and she really wanted it to happen, but got very frustrated and lost interest. We're not together anymore, but I am interested in hugging out with other women, but if they want me to be able to ejaculate during oral sex, what

do I do? Take it easy, Bruce. Bruce, first of all, nothing wrong with not being able to ejaculate during oral sex. A lot of men, I know several men who don't have orgasms during, they just doesn't do it for them for whatever reason. So you think that's weird? No. No, I think it's common.

Some men are just like, for whatever reason, they feel like the woman doesn't want to do it or they're too inside their head Or they want to wait till they're having intercourse, but I don't think there's anything wrong with that at all that you didn't so this woman the fact That she made you feel bad about it doesn't it's not nice. Yeah, you just really have to Get into it. Yeah, you have to really just you know be all about what's going down at that moment Yeah, you're talking about getting in your head. No pun intended. If you start going off into another place and thinking about other things, then yes,

it's not going to happen. It's so important to a lot of sexual issues that people have challenges. I hate to say this function and I hate using issues because really, you don't have an issue, Bruce. But let's just say challenges. Maybe you'd like to be able to orgasm when someone's going down on you. It is like menacing. You have to get outside your head because a lot of times it becomes,

it's this psychological, like, I'm not going to orgasm, I'm not going to orgasm, and then you don't. So we just kind of breathe like breath. Like our guest said yesterday, breath is so important during sex. Just breathe and get outside your head and get into your body. That's how I feel. That's good. Okay.

All right. I didn't hear anything I guess I said yesterday because I was so bored. Thanks. I'm the same. Really? Yeah. Well, you know, maybe some people felt like they heard the last podcast and they felt that way. If you enjoyed it, you enjoyed it. Right. I was bored. You were bored. You just didn't like her because you bought a dog. Man, it's always kicked her out because you bought a dog. Manus is talking to me. Yes, yeah. How am I mean? You're just mean sometimes.

I have worked in radio like 13 years. I've never had it. I've never had it. I've never had it. I've never had it. I've never had it get her tattoo or something. No, but I'm just saying I've never had a guest bring a dog. I know, we're not allowed to jogs in the building.

Stitcher is very nice for having us be here. And so we just had a situation and she was like, well, I can't be here unless I have my dog here and we didn't get a permit. Men's was like, okay, see ya. I was like, okay, see ya. I was like, this is our guest. Anyway. No, we don't blow it off.

We're telling stories here. Okay. You know, we got to tell people what's really going on. Tell okay, so it's really going on. Is she walking with her dog? Yeah. Men's was like, she's like, I'll leave. And she's like, okay, see ya.

And I was like, you can't just have our guest leave because she brought a dog. She didn't know. And then she was a little demanding. She was like, I need water. Are we paid for my parking and all that stuff? Yeah. So that was a little like.

It was just weird to me because I've never had somebody act like that. Right. So my natural thing is not to cater to that until we get the F out. In a nice way. Exactly. What you did.

It was very awkward moment. He's like, okay, leave. And I'm like, looking at her because she came all across, you know, she's traveling and she came to the show and men is told her to leave. But she's going to leave and she's so scared. You enjoyed the conversation with her. I enjoyed the conversation with her a lot. I think she's really interesting.

But it's fine that you just tune out and were sending emails the whole time But it makes me tense when you do that because I feel like you're in hat because I felt like Yesterday you were really since you guys had that little tip at the beginning Uh-huh, but you hold on to things sometimes I feel I don't though I felt like you were like upset the whole time and you're like I you weren't gonna like her no matter what she said You're gonna be bored because you were just listen. You were annoyed that she barred in the dog and she went against like, you wanted her to leave

and I wanted her to stay. And I, in a way, I won, if you will, and she stayed. I feel like you were kind of brooding and annoyed that like the whole thing that she brought the dog, that she got to stay, you wanted her to leave. And then you're looking down and then I'm like, where's Menace, my buddy here? No, but that's what usually doing guests are here anyways. I just have, I let you do

your thing and talk with the guests. I don't like, I don't jump in. I just don't jump in. But if there's something that I'm really, sometimes you jump in, if there's something that I'm really interested in, I've been nothing to do with the show yesterday. Like you could have just gone outside and gotten a hamburger or something. But I'm like an interrupted talking. I know. The thing that I was really interested in talking to her about, but it didn't seem like she was really into talking about was her, you know,

past as a female. Yeah, as a part. And being an escort. And it seemed like you guys were beyond that, and you want to talk about other things. And then what she was talking about, was just like, I didn't really have anything. But I felt that I had to bring to a table.

So it was like, you do your thing. Right, I got it. I feel like you still brewed a little. You hang on to things. I don't want to hang on to things. I think you do your thing. Right, I got it. I feel like you still brewed a little. You hang on to things. I don't want to hang on to things. I think you do. I don't care. It's business.

Okay. Dear Emily, I love listening to your show. I've mentioned your show to my wife a few times. How do you think I could convince her upper suede her to listen? Menace's sexy voice, perhaps. What? I don't know. We have an awesome sex life when we find time.

Two kids here. Maybe she thinks it's like porn and I'm seeking satisfaction from your podcast. Sign Lucas. Lucas, just tell her to listen to it once and find a few of your favorite episodes that you think would appeal to her and just have her put it on in the car or something. And when you're taking a road trip, people, a lot of couples, I have to tell you that you could tell her this. A lot of couples and close friends of mine, which I find so funny, which is interesting, they use this show as a vehicle and as a tool to talk about sex with their partner. So a lot of people are not comfortable to talk to their partner's wife, sex, but since you listen to sex with Emily together,

you can be like, oh, hey, she was just talking about oral sex. Do you think I provide, does it bum you out that I don't perform oral sex song on you or does it bum you out that I can't have an organ? So I bring up issues that get you guys talking. So I've had a lot of couples email me and say, it's improved their sex life because it's kind of like, I'm there kind of helping you guys talk.

Debate and talk and get into it. So I think you should just tell her that it's not porn. A lot of women, a lot of men learn, and it's educational and funny. We help an informative. Informative. You always make that it's not porn, a lot of women, a lot of men learn, and it's educational, and funny, we help, and informative. Informative. You want to make sure it's informative. I try to be informatating,

informatacious, informatacious. I want to be informatacious and make up issues. Okay, dear Emily, I had to reply to your comment about men who don't undress their women. I love to address my partner. It's a very centrist part of foreplay, and it's like opening a present. I love to address my partner. It's a very sensuous part of foreplay and it's like opening a present. I love standing behind my partner, then reaching around and slowly

unbuttoning her. I love it when her neck and shoulders are exposed for kissing. I dated one woman who had some body image issues, so once I faced her into the mirror as I addressed her from behind, then told her to look at how beautiful she was. That's hot, I think. The visual she got of my hands appreciating her pretty shape must have done the trick because the sex we had that night was incredible.

Justin the pinion from one man who loves undressing a pretty woman signed anonymous. I give him power, props, power, sorry. Power props. Power props on being able to do that. Because me personally, I was just feel so awkward doing something like that I'm dressing a woman and being like look in the mirror You're looking in the mirror and yeah, I just I can I can't do that. What about you?

Can you say tell can you tell a man like here look? I don't dress let me see your I think I want to be on top of me and be like look you are. Like, I think that mirrors in a bedroom are super hot. If you have a mirror by the bed or mirrors on the ceiling, no, no, I'm not. It was for mirrors on the ceiling, it's really, I guess. It's dangerous. But if you like a big, like a mirror, it's really hot to watch each other have sex.

And if you're a dresser and you're like, look, it's just hot. Women want to feel appreciated and adored. So with like that last female when I was like compliment her five, 10 times a day, I don't mean like nice shoes, honey, nice purse, nice, nice souffle you made tonight. I just mean like, it's important to constantly

like to reinforce and women should do it to men too, but I think it just makes them feel good and more open sexually and more comfortable because women have insecurities and we wanna feel adored at the end of the day. I love it. So if you address us slowly and appreciate our bodies, I can't imagine what woman wouldn't want that to happen.

If you're like, you're so beautiful, even if she's got body images, which a lot of women do, but you're like, no, I'm beautiful, you are. I'm trying to say, even if she's extremely beautiful in like perfect body, I still don't, I still, maybe something's wrong with me. I just couldn't keep a straight straight face doing that like Take take it off baby. Let me see it

No, you don't anymore. No one does I'm Guess I don't pay attention to that stuff whatever Exactly exactly my point everyone don't Exactly, that's a most of them't lose it's honest. Enjoy. Exactly, that's a most of them. They're like, I'm hard, so you must be ready. And women can't go from zero to 60 like men. Men are like ready to go in.

They're like, why aren't you ready to go on? I'm ready to go on. We're going, we're going, we're going. And I'm like, what's going on? My clothes are still on. I am so not even turned on yet. And you've got a boner and you think that I'm ready to have sex with you.

Which is- You're not? No. You need to undress me slowly. So that's the key. And compliments me. I am a tease. OK, let's get into some sex tips.

OK. OK, 1,000 women tell what works and what doesn't. So here's some stats. So this is what people worry about in bed. The number one thing that men worry about in bed, do you want wanna guess? Being a one minute man, performance. That they won't last long enough. Some guys are afraid, and some guys are also afraid,

they're not big enough. What do you think women's number one in securities are? Being fat. They're weight. How long it takes to reach orgasm. So the number one thing that we took away from the poll is that people are willing to talk. And couples talk the sex only gets better. Nearly every man will take the poll so they want to know if they're doing something right or wrong and they could do it

better. 80% of men say they're very open guidance from their partner agreeing with this statement, whatever she wants, all she has to do is ask. Women said the same thing, they're very open to it. So talking to your partner and telling them what feels good is very important. Overall, performance, when we asked men to rate their sexual skills on a scale of 1 to 10, 29% of men gave themselves a 7. Well, 40% gave themselves an 8 or higher. However, women rated their guys all at 8 or higher. So, men are devaluing their performance.

Women are saying that they're a lot better in bed and men are thinking they're a lot worse in bed. Okay, so insecurities, when we asked men with their most insecure about 36% said it was premature ejaculation. However, the obvious thing is to ask the women how they feel about that. And the women said 38% said he always lasts long enough. And 43% said not all the time, but usually. So men's biggest concern, women are saying, we're not concerned that you're not lasting long enough. That's only 38%. They said 38% says he does last long enough.

That's significant. I say 90% of the time I last long enough. How about you, Do? Yeah. I don't know, you wouldn't tell me, but I got your minute map. Okay, how to help for orgasm? So this is the thing, 22% of women said the way she'll orgasm more is having more oral sex.

This isn't a study, this is not me. Yeah, right. You, I see it written down in pen. No. Next to premature ejaculation, men are most concerned that they don't measure up, which 17.6 men, 17.6 men list is one insecurity, which is their size.

Okay, so their biggest complaint is from women, can you imagine their biggest number one complaint from women about men, sexually? There's no make out session before. Not enough for a flight, ding, ding, ding, you're right, you're right. That is when the competition takes place. That is my touch, me.

Okay, so here's what we gotta do. So mistakes and feedback, one of the most troubling stats came out when 29% said there's no mistakes and women said this too, we just wish that we would do it more. And then so basically what the takeaways are here are that from this whole study is that make feedback sexy, not strange. So you should, both men and women said

they want to give feedback to their partner, right? So it doesn't mean you have to be a silted discussion and you should just make sure that you it seems like both men and women want feedback. Number two takeaway from the study is to prolong foreplay. It should be a progression, not a sprint. You just need to give a time. How many minutes? Watching sexy moving together, floating over romantic meal, whispering compliments in the midst of a crowded party. I think I said... I'm not saying that I'm going to... Okay, just give me...

22 minutes. 22 minutes of making out for play. It could be anything. If you do a good job... Do you give me a blowjob, a for play? For you. After you went down to me for 25 minutes. 25! Longer for play helps men synchronize with their partners, giving them better control over you, after you went down to me for 25 minutes. 25. Yeah. Longer for play helps men synchronize with their partners, giving them better control over ejaculation. You've got to get the timing right.

Most couples fall into a rut of having sex at bedtime. But the work week is actually the worst time for lovemaking. In a survey, 64% of men said that they're exhaustion and stress and all that stuff. So you should try to do it on the the weekends when you're like lazy and bad. Saturday mornings don't try to do it. Yeah, that's what I wait for.

You do? I wait for all my love making on the weekends. Are you really? Yeah, I don't. No, I don't do anything really. That's what a lot of couples do. So, switch up your regular schedule. If it doesn't work during the week to say, you know what, it's too stressful during the

week, but we're going to be, you know what do they say, like the people who work out only on the weekends? What do they call those people? Weekend warriors like you work out only on the weekends, so like what if you only have sex with party on the weekends too is weekend Right, weekend warriors whatever I think of the gym because I used to be an athlete I guess I'm still an athlete But whatever they were like the weekend wears okay, and the last thing that came from the study is foster feeling of emotional Closeness and this is for men and women a of men, and almost half of women say that feeling emotionally connected is the most important part of mind-blowing sex. Feeling emotionally connected.

If you were felt emotionally connected to anyone during sex, open your eyes, save the moment, pause to breathe, and establish eye contact between kisses. Be aware of every touch and caress. The more security both feel the less guarded sex will become. That's a very inclusive study. That's a lot of work. That's a lot of work, honey. But you learned a lot today. Okay everyone, so thanks so much for listening to the show.

And thanks for checking out sectorthemly.com and I'll be exciting things we have going on there. Just keep watching it. And you'll be happy. So anyway, thanks everyone. It was a good for you. Email me feedback at sexwithemily.com. This episode is brought to you by one of our amazing sponsors, Masks Sexual Flavor Strips. They enhance your sexual experiences with a taste of strawberry, mango, watermelon, or chocolate. It's kind of like a Listerine strip, but for sex. So if you like sex and you want to make it even more enjoyable and you like hearing sacks of that movie for free, check out Mask at sexualflavors.com. Enjoy the show.

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