Sex With Emily - The Casual Pick Up & How To Last All Night

Episode Date: April 13, 2014

Tonight on the Sex WIth Emily show former pornstar and best-selling author Shy Love, gives her best oral sex tips for men and women, shares the ingredients for a successful marriage and offers some interesting tactics on how to approach women including the “casual pick-up.”Emily also gets the ex-pornstar to reveal what good sex really is and the real importance of foreplay.Then the esteemed Dr. Lawrence Levine,  a lead contributor to the study of male sexual dysfunction,  joins the show to talk about premature ejaculation, a condition gaining spotlight as it’s three times more common than erectile dysfunction. Dr. Levine shares some amazing breakthroughs in science for men with want to last longer in bed. Emily offers suggestions for women on how talk to their partners about premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction as many men have a hard time improving sexual performance on their own. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hey guys, can I see a question? How are your balls feeling right now? Are they super clean and dry? Does your partner complain or is not always willing to go downtown? If so, I've got something for you. I've just launched a new product called Down Under Comfort for my brand Emeline Tony. It's really unique. It's a cream to tap yoga powder formula that is designed to keep men fresh and clean down

under or wherever they need. And girls can use it too, under their brass, the lower back, anywhere they want to stay fresh. order formula that is designed to keep men fresh and clean down under or wherever they need. And girls can use it too, under their brass, the lower back, anywhere they want to stay fresh. So how keep this podcast free and your balls dry? Use code Emily to get 20% off your first purchase. Check them out today at Emily and Tony.com. Trust me and you're welcome. Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex.

Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Betrubized, they call them in a fight on me. Hey, Avaline, you got a boyfriend? Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got a hair stand. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage.

Isn't it common knowledge? What do you mean, like laundry? It's shrink? Can we not talk about sex so much? Are you kidding me? Oh my god, I'm off here. So gone. Being bad feels pretty good. You know Emily's not the kind of girl you just play with. You're listening to Sex with Emily. We're talking about sex relationships and everything in between for more information go to sexwithemily.com. Please do that, check out my site because it's a chock full of information for you. We've got blogs, you've got videos.

We even have our mailing list that you should sign up for and get the five biggest mistakes you're making about if you're a man or a woman you can choose because everyone, you might be making some mistakes. You might need a little tune up. And I might email you every once in a while, I won't spam you. If they're actually useful, I actually got Anderson.

I'm here with Anderson. You know, I was in Vegas, I just got back from Las Vegas. Hey girl. Hey, what's up? Hala. Hala. I got in last night and like I had a few people come to me. They're like, we love your newsletter. We want to emulate like people in my industry. It was a sex toy conference. It was an international organization. Step off, bitch. Don't they're like, we love your newsletter. I'm like, I tell people I feel like I have use other people actually want to read because they're like good tips and stuff. I'm not like selling you crap But it was fun Anderson. That's why I'm a little um might seem a little tired. I feel like Five minutes and I was in Vegas. It was tough. It's walking with a bunch of laundry models and got a bunch of sex toys and stuff that I got some gifts for you all later Stuff like that. You said that last week and I walked out here with nothing dude., I have a bag next to me, okay? I want to. So chill out.

Tonight's show, I'm so excited for my guest. I have Shy Love in here. Let's give her a big round of applause. She's a former porn star. And now she's a successful business woman, authored to two best sellers, which I love the titles, because every single one of my listeners shy, absolutely need help.

Well, okay, the first one is how to catch a kitten. Yep. So I assume that's for men to try to find a kitten. It's for men trying to find beautiful women that they normally can't get. Ooh, so stepping it up, getting out of their league. They'd completely get in on their league. Well, the limiting beliefs that they believe they can't get a hot shot. Exactly.

You're going to show them how. Okay, also, I shouldn't say this for everyone, but you know, it's always easier to fall in love with a rich man than a poor man. My friend Tommy, how to land a rich man is your other book. How to catch a kitten? How to land a rich man? They're both on both best sellers on Amazon. And your website is moneylovesuccess.com.

Yes, it is. Okay. So how to land a rich, these are so interesting. Okay, so first of all, how did you, so you were a porn star, you were tired. How was that? Being a porn star was fun but exhausting. Yeah, what do you think,

what did you learn about sex being a porn star? Did you must have like learned so much? Like what was your top sex tip? Prior to porn, I didn't even know how to be sexy. Really? At all, porn taught me how to be sexy and more comfortable within my own skin. And then the person I was probably the first day and six months later was completely different,

because I was very open to sexuality and my own sexuality. I think the best thing I learned was how to give the best blowjob. Really? Every man I've ever given a blowjob to said it is the best they've ever had. Okay, that hasn't happened to me. So, I love asking, but what is your, why do you think, what is it? What do you do?

Give me the text. Well, one, I make sure teeth are very important not to be involved, so learn not to do that. No teeth. teeth are very important not to be involved so learn not to do that. I do a lot of massaging with my tongue from the shaft up while I'm going up and down and I massage and massage with your tongue. So it's kind of like you take your tongue and you just like massage it like. I have a chocolate penis here. I'm gonna give her one. That's my right idea. You massage the bottom of the penis with your tongue. Then most girls think that it's just taking your hands and going back and forth. With your hand and mouth up.

It's not. It's about how much, but you can get into your hand and moving it in a circular motion as you're basically pushing your mouth in. Moving the circular motion at the bottom. No, from the top. From the top to the bottom. Twist it, as you're going down and as you're going up. Okay, right. And then use your tongue swirl it around, do massage, all that. Make sure it's wet. How do you feel about the balls?

I don't think there's anything wrong with it. Do you play with them always or is it depend on the guy? I think it depends on the guys. Some guys don't like it as some guys do. It's true. Some guys are like, say we have my freaking balls. They don't want to be Dutch. I know, you got to feel it out. You want to tend to. Sometimes you just try it and they're like, you can see when they kind of nudge away. And you're like, okay.

Have a hygiene, how do you feel about men who maybe are down there or not as clean? Does that ever happen to you? No. It ever happens important, right? Because you all shower before you sleep. Everybody is completely showered. And I am a massive germaphal.

Right. So if I'm with a guy and there's anything wrong, the moment I go there, I'm like, you need to go in a shower because this is not gonna happen like this. I have no shame in it. It's true because I actually created a product that I'm gonna give to you.

It's called Down Under Comfort. It's for men and for women and it's a cream. It's a deodorant for your down under parts. Men can find other balls, women can wait between their legs because we sweat We get dirty like aren't they but we're not in your personal life are in the real pill you date? I know you're married now But like you're just like really like you shower this morning like you're not fresh now anyway. I'll give it to you down I don't know I

First it's so weird because I've every time I've been in a relationship. I'm meeting the married the guy So it's kind of like my thing So I've never liked just randomly with a whole bunch of guys in my personal life. But I would literally always have afternoon sacks. Like, instead of doing lunch, where people would go to work. And this is like, even when I was in the accountant before even got into porn, I would leave, instead of going lunch for my hour, I would go and have sex with my car

with my husband. I love, oh my god. How have you guys been together? My husband, I, nine and a half with my husband. Wow, I love my husband. Oh my God. How have you guys been together? My husband and I, nine and a half years. Oh my God, that's great. Just two guys have sex in the afternoon. Yeah. I love that.

What is this? Okay. So, but what is the secret to that success? Well, the good thing is my husband and I are not together all the time. He travels and I travel. And I think the biggest part of most relationships is that people believe that a girl and a guy need to be together all the time. That's just like a recipe for disaster.

If you're not on top of each other, you both have your separate lives, even though you're together, you're still dating. And nine and a half years, I'm still dating my husband. I 100% agree with you. I think that we are told in this culture that you need to become one, you need to live together every day, share everything, not a lot of secrets, that's not sexy. That's not sexy. That's needy. That's needing something, not wanting it. And the role of a relationship is the moment you need it instead of wanting it, then that's going to be the end of the lives of your relationship.

So you're both really independent and have time apart. I think that I always feel like my friends who have husbands or the wives travel, either one that their relationships or even people have on my show, that seems to be stronger, like you need the time away. So you can miss each other. So there's excitement. Yeah, which is what we do.

I mean, he leaves for five weeks and he'll show up and I'm like, oh my God, it's great to have you here. And then we're like little fuckbunnings and having fun all day long. And then I'll leave. And I'm like, okay, see you later. And then I come home. And it's so,

Because you keep it going. Because we're told again, like you're supposed to become one, but that could be of this drive for security as well, but that drive for security squashes all the passion. Because passion is unpredictability, and it's the newness and the freshness and the missing and the long, you've perfect formula.

Yeah, it's a perfect formula. And we have a whole, and we have a whole, yeah. And we have a role like, you know, he calls home to speak to the kids And then Annie's put them on with the kids and stuff like that But I only speak to him maybe once a day for like five minutes when he's gone out of town So that way we're really really missing each other. I'm not like texting all day. I do not we barely text

We barely call each other. I think that's really not bad I think that we overdo it now in today's culture because we can tech we have this expectation that we're in a relationship we need to be texting. They'll time we need to be sending pictures we need to be flirting and yeah I think when you're first dating and you're in that honeymoon period yeah you're going to do the Qt texting being sexy about it because you're trying to draw the guy in and wheel him in so you can snatch him. But once you're past that, at that point, you have to decide, you just look like you're desperate. Once you get to that certain point in your relationship, your consistently texting is like, do you not trust me that you have to text me all the time?

You know, do you not have your own personal life that you have to be attentive to me all day long? And that's why people get bored and they move on. It's so true. It's like you got to get like people and a lot of times the things that people are most attracted to might be your independence and you're doing something that you or how you are in your life when they meet you and then people tend to change when they get in relationships and they're no longer that person either become needy, they become attached. So don't give up your life for anyone when you start dating or ever just keep your independence going because that's the thing that is the sexiest thing about you.

I would agree. Maintain your independence and your life but but you can still have a successful marriage, like you do. So you went from porn into, then what made you leave porn? Was there, there was nothing bad. I mean, the business was great. I still belong with everyone. It was just, I wanted to get married, have kids, and I just couldn't see myself being

a- It's kinda hard to judge it all. Yeah. Being a part of what has been wants to know that his wife is going to sat and having sex with random people, and then going home, and that's just not gonna work. Yeah. And not with men.

As a mother, I just didn't feel that it was my place to do that. And then you go home and you kiss your kid in the mouth or you're afraid to drink out of the same bottle with them. I didn't want any of those experiences. So I told myself today I wanted to get married and have kids, it would be my end. And then you met your man, how'd you meet him?

He built a house for me. Oh, he did? Yes, he was like, contract physically building it? No, he was my development. So you watched him putting up the bricks and stuff or whatever contractors do? That's how I'd marry. I'd marry someone building something for me.

I just want someone put up a shelf in my bathroom. Maybe I'll marry that guy. You know what's funny is I'm married to him. Somebody may not be back at sexelme.com if you want to use a manhandi work, maybe I'm married to you. Oh my gosh, there's nothing to do that anymore. Now he goes and says I'm just gonna hire someone that you can do that.

But you build a whole house for me. He goes, yeah, and that's what I can pay someone else to do it. I don't have time for it. Exactly, you know, that's too. You get to certain point where you can hire people, which is good. Everything, delegate, delegate, delegate.

Okay, so I wanna talk about, well, we'll Delegate, delegate, delegate. Okay, so I want to talk about, well, we'll get back to some sex tips in a minute, but I also want to tell you we have a special doctor calling in in a little bit. For a few minutes, Dr. Levine, and he is Dr. Lawrence Levine, and he's gonna be talking about, he is an expert on male sexual issues.

I hate the word dysfunction, kind of bothers me, it's labeling things, but some men have a reptile dysfunction or they've issues with, you know, staying hard, not staying hard, or coming, and just a lot of different treatments for men having issues with their penises. So we're just going to talk to them for a few minutes and a little bit, but that's saw. I just wanted to give you guys an update on what's coming up. Okay, so tell me about your books. How did you get to? Okay, let's talk about how to catch a kitten. How do you get to kitten? Why do you think that men? I mean, there are so many people out there teaching men different tricks out of the high dealers that will pick up our community. There's the, you know, like how to just land the other ones that who are like get our number and sleep

with them at night, like seductive things and their ones their ones were like be a better man. And you know, like what is your theory for men about in your book, how to catch a kitten? Tell me your philosophy, but also I want to know why you think it is after that men have such a hard time finding women. I think men have a problem finding women because they're insecure with themselves or insecure with confronting someone in hearing the rejection. And they rather just not confront the girls than to hear no. And I think that fear so calls this a lot of guys to think that a girl is not up to par, like they're not up to par for that girl and that girl is way above them.

And I think that's where the biggest problem comes in. But the reason why my, I think my PUA stuff is a little bit different because I'm not going to call it a pick up artist. Right. Is I wrote it in the perspective of a woman and what I did was I took all of my secrets of what men have done to me or what had been done to my girlfriends and that actually worked. And I'm not saying that these relationships are the best and I'm not saying they didn't last for a long time or anything like that. But it was just some really crazy things that they did and I realized that the reason why

they worked is because as women we say one thing, but in reality we go for the opposite of what we say and unfortunately the way to get a woman is to make it seem like she's basically nothing that she's not that important. Really? So you believe in that whole like disser, that kind of thing? I don't think so. There's a thing between dissing.

I don't think you should ever diss a woman. But it's like, for instance, you go to a bar, you see a girl, she's really hot. All these guys are giving her attention at the bar. You really want to talk to a girl. You don't know what to do. So you go in there and you're like, excuse me, do you mind if I squeeze in there? And you order the drink and she's sitting

there wondering, why hasn't this guy talked to me? She knows she's hot. She knows she's got all these guys are checking me out. And he might sit there and have this drink an entire time, not even act like she exists. That's going to get her more attracted to them than the guy who says, they're in says, hey, by the way, my name is right. And can't get you drink or hey, what are you doing here? Where are you from? It's not about this thing girl. It's just by making her feel that maybe there's something wrong with her because you're not giving her the attention.

Wow. So it seems so tricky though. But so you think for you, when a man, because you're a beautiful woman, so you had so many men that that that we're always hitting on you that you thought, because I think I have this to sometimes I think who are the guys that that why do they, I mean, so many men, who are the ones that like got in like why what I thought About this to like to tell my god what do they do so for you was the guys. It's maybe they see more mysterious So they seem like they have more as much going on as you are they the mysterious guys and the ones that are harder to get are usually the

Challenge that I love and that's what I go after okay, I want the guy that doesn't want me Because it's it's more of a thrill, but do you think every woman feels that way like I love that as you want me? But I don't want me like I'm like I'm not chasing you. I'm not even want me looking me buddy But I don't want you in a way that they don't think you're high. It's like They're not giving you the problem. They're not doing the typical long. Yeah, this is thing that Alex steering women. Yeah, is that pretty women know that they're pretty, they're hearing it all the time.

So for them, when you give them a compliment, it's just like a brush over the shoulder, whatever, you know, I've already heard this before. Right. So what do you do when you're trying to get the attention of a woman who's already acting this?

Because unless you were ugly when you were a kid, and then you became pretty, then you're more understanding to a guy, and you're like, you know what, it's a pleasure to meet you and you're respectable in that manner.. Right. And you're like, you know what? It's a pleasure to meet you and you're respectable in that manner. But if you're just naturally pretty and you've been pretty your whole life, usually it's

a little bit more difficult to confront those. Right. So were you always a pretty girl? No, I was ugly, duckling. You were. I was extremely intelligent. I can't imagine. You guys are going to take this out.

We're doing a video, a little video after the show and some pictures. If you want to check it out, it'll be on our website, our YouTube channel. Um, really? So to what age, when did you blossom? At about 22. Okay. And then you felt pretty, but you had all those years of. I still feel pretty. I felt better looking. Right. Did you work on it? Or did you just go into? I worked on it. Yeah. Got contacts, took off braces. Right. God, we've got. Thought the boob job. Right. I feel like I just moved out. I should probably do that. So you're gonna be next weekend and I'll schedule that.

I totally get it. So, okay, that's interesting. So pretty women, let's talk about this for a minute because I feel like it is true. I thought about it. The guys who, because every guy, to me, I go to buy the elephant the same or I'm out of the party, he's talking, maybe he thinks I'm high, but the guys who are interesting or intriguing, that's just different, it's not just like, hey, you know, you look, you're so pretty. So I love your eyes, but they're like, challenge you in a way or they say, challenge is interesting.

So besides just being like the aloof guy, the bar, what else do you tell him as far as conversation centers? Typically, I tell guys the worst place to pick up a girl, believe it or not, is nightclub. I mean, I don't think that's an appropriate. I would say bar, but it's not the best place. I don't think it's what I usually say. The biggest, the best pickups, sometimes is airports. Because you're sitting down, you see a pretty girl,

you're going to be sitting there anyway to get on that plane. And I'll tell you, the best pickup I've ever had wasn't in airport. Really? What happened? There was this really cute guy, and he comes up to me. And he's like, do you know how long does flights delayed? I'm like, well, they just said 20 minutes,

but this is the third time they've changed it. And he's like, okay, thank you so much. And he sat next to me and he's just on his phone doing whatever he's doing and totally not even talking to me. And then he goes, the flight got delayed by another 20 minutes. He goes, I just want to go grab a drink. Do you mind watching my bag? Right.

And I'm like, yeah, not a problem. And then he goes, do you want me to go grab a drink. Do you mind watching my bag? Right. And I'm like yeah not a problem. And then he goes do you want me to grab you a drink as well? Maybe while I'm doing this? And it wasn't like he was forcing himself. He was just being polite. And I'm like okay so this guy's asking me to watch his bag. He's asking for a drink. He's not flirting with me. He's not asking me. I know what I'm gonna to do right now. Right. What is going on here? It's gay. Right. And I'm like, I was confused by it,

but it made me want to have a conversation with him. Right. And he and I are really good friends now, which is funny. But that was one of his pickup ways. It was never that. Did he ever admit that? Yeah. He thought you were so smoking hot.

I said that with comfort. Oh, he said the moments. He says, I looked at you from across. What I saw, I knew i wanted to talk to you and everything else and totally was like wanting me and that was one of his pickups right totally work as he was casual he wasn't obsessed if he wasn't like nervous he wasn't staring you for ten minutes for when i talked to you because he wasn't about me right it intrigued me more to want to know more about him and

we ended up talking the entire flight and we had one kiss and then I think we had a going to an event together and I was like and he looked at me and I was like I think we're better off as friend you want to be my wingman and I'll be your wing woman That's getting a contradiction to that That's what it came out to be because we were way too similar and it was weird to have someone be identical to you. Right. He was like the male version of me and I was like, okay, I don't want that. I don't want that at all. I do not want to date me. I don't want to date me. I killed myself if I did. Exactly. Me too. I mean, Jesus, I must come myself. No, it's okay.

But so what other things work? Let's say guys, I always say Starbucks because that's a great place in the morning. You're waiting for coffee or wherever you get coffee if it's at Starbucks that I don't care. But what about just like if you notice a woman in line like what do you do? Um, if you notice a woman in line she's right in front of you. You can easily just say to you know how long you've been waiting here. I'm just trying to keep notice observed something. Observe the situation. Make the conversation something to Narek that the girl has to answer whether she wants to not because otherwise she's being rude. So then she'll be able to say, well, you know, I've been

waiting here for five minutes. It's not really long wait. And he goes, oh, thank you so much. And by then she actually looks at him says, okay, you know what, this guy is exactly like him. And then it leads into more conversations. Exactly. The best way is not to do pickup lines. The best way is to be as natural and as casual and make it a generic conversation regarding what's happening around the surroundings. And in that way, the girl doesn't feel like you're picking her up and that won't treat her more.

Exactly, I totally agree. And the other thing that men can do, so you know you guys, this show is free. I love bringing you all this show, but so I can keep doing it every week, twice a week, but this show is brought to you by Max Furman because this is another thing they can help men. It's a product line all about increasing male pleasure, attraction, and performance. So if you use coupon code Emily25, you get 25% off at max Furman, that's max the number

four men.com. They have this like pherom Cologne and it's like Peribund Free, Sugar Free and it's like a sex attractant. And it is and I have so they also have another brand called Crazy Girl and I put it on at the conference this weekend and I'm telling you like I'm like Fairmoans whatever I don't know every guy was like you smell amazing and like guys they weren't just hitting it. They were like an elevator with them like you smell amazing. So Max attract Fairmoan Cologne is also great and their products are really reasonably priced. Max, shave, gel, max, oral, sex gel, they have really cool products.

Max, four men, the number four, and use coupon code Emily25, and you get 20% off. So if they're wearing that cologne, women might just fall over them, but also you said something interesting earlier when you said that men are so afraid of rejection. And I was actually talking about this.

I was driving back from Vegas to my assistant Lauren. I was saying it's so interesting that the only men that we meet, because she's a hot smart chick, but I'm just like, no, it's funny. It's the guy, because in this business I've learned, it's the guys that have the balls to talk to us. There's a whole bunch of really nice guys that we might actually want to date and be with,

but they're so goddamn afraid of rejection, to talk to us, they're nervous. Once they got past that, we might find out. We might love them, but there's like so many men who are paralyzed with fear about talking to women, saying the wrong thing. And it's like, it is the rejection. So maybe the first times you, three times you talked with the reporter, the coffee shop or lunch, you fumble, but you get bad. It's practice. If you do it enough time, it will naturally come and you won't even know you're doing it. Exactly. So at first it's rejected two three four times. Trust me it is going to teach you

what got you rejected so that you knew the tactics for the next thing. Exactly. And you get better. Rejection makes it stronger like that which does not kill you make you stronger. I mean I know that being in their team business like I rejected all the time like if I don't get rejected I'm shocked and even when something good happens I'm like oh believe it when I see stronger. I mean, I know that being in their team business, I get rejected all the time. Like if I don't get rejected, I'm shocked. And even when something good happens, I'm like, oh, believe it or not. No, not that I'm negative, it's tough. So you, but I've learned that I get over it. Like, if things happen, if they don't happen,

they don't happen. I have a role to always look for the worst so that when the best happens, you can take the enjoyment of it. Yeah, exactly. I don't know if you live in the worst, but I always look like, but everything's okay now. If that happens to be great, if it doesn't happen, but yeah, you could also think of the worst. I think of the. Yeah, exactly. I don't know if you live in the worst, but I always look like but everything's okay now. If that happens to be great, if it doesn't happen, but yeah,

you could also think of the worst. I think of the worst Michael. Okay, it's probably not going to happen. So who cares? And then when it does happen, it's like, oh my god, it actually happened. Right. Right. You're like, wow, exactly. I totally agree. So in your books, so how to catch a kitten? So you teach them how to approach the woman. Oh, I used to go on to approach the woman and then you teach them how to, um, and then what, like you go through the whole is it more about just approaching? No, the book goes from approaching how to maintain the relationship, whether you want it

just from one nice stand or if you want it for a full relationship relationship. So it goes from everything and it gives you all the taxes on how to keep the girl and how to make sure that she stays yours. Oh, okay. I want to get to that. But first we have our special caller. We've Dr. Levine on the phone and he is a specialist from Chicago. Hey, Dr. Levine, are you there?

Can you hear me? Okay, we're waiting for Dr. Lawrence Levine and he's going to talk about treatment or premature ejaculation. He's actually a specialist from Chicago, and he is, I'm trying to find some of this, so he is a professor in the Department of Eurology at West University Medical Center in Chicago, Illinois. He's made a substantial contribution to the medical press in the form of peer-reviewed articles, book chapters.

He talks about dysfunction, fertility, peronies, disease, forget- book chapters, he talks about dysfunction, fertility, peronies, disease, forget again, to male sexual dysfunction, which you know a lot of our listeners, have you been with a man who had some dysfunction? Maybe he... And porn, yes. Oh my God, really?

Like how so? What is he doing? On set, yeah. Does he come too quickly, not enough? There have been guys who've come too quickly, or you're even doing soft core, which means you're not even in penetration, and it's, oops oops there's been guys who can't even get it up at all. Right they can't get it up they can't they can't they get it up and then it goes.

I mean there's so much amends just like I mean think I got you know vagra has been huge but I'm sure does every time important take vagra. They take vagra, psialis and then some injection. I forgot what it's called. Yes I just heard heard about this injection. I think it's not good for you. I don't think so, but they still do it. That's why Dr. Levina, are you there with us? Hello. Hi, thank you so much for calling into sex with Emily. I'm delighted that last. I know, I'm so glad to talk to you because you do very important work. Well, thank you.

I think you do too. Well, thank you. I mean, the penis, let's talk about it. There's people, people have issues, men. They don't want us for directions when they're lost and talk about it. There's these people, people have issues. Men, they don't want S for directions when they're lost and they don't want to talk to anyone about their penis issues. So I love that you have among all your accomplishments, you've done a lot of important work around

male sexual dysfunction and peronies disease and you've just, you know, fertility, everything, right? So, what I was wondering, like, if you if you get talked to us about some of your latest uh... findings well you know it's one of the things that uh... i want to talk about tonight was something that uh... i'm seeing more and more of in my practice and i think we're seeing more and more up uh... in the medical literature that's going to be more more doctors who are

interested in it because men are coming forward with premature ejaculation. Right. Certainly not an uncommon problem. And maybe even two to three times more common than ED. Yeah, I know. It's, yeah, exactly. Why do you think that is? Is it because they're coming forth more or doing this reason why there's, we're hearing

more about it? Well, I think people are getting more more more relaxed about talking about these things i mean sex is important uh... it's uh... you know it's i think we can live without it but i think most of us would rather not and it it's certainly is a critical part to i think any man's and

also woman's life i and as a result of i think the whole opening of of the society with respect to what happened with Viagra years ago, I think this is just the next thing in line that's coming forward. I think that men who have had this problem have suffered in silence, sort of like ED was 2030 years ago. Right, right. And now we have this, some opportunities to be able to offer treatment to these fellas.

And if they want to come forward now, they don't have to necessarily go to the doctor. There's a new product that I've been delighted to be able to offer to my patients. And I've seen some remarkable results in this product called ProMessant. Right, right. we've talked about promise is amazing that's why i'm glad because they told me about you as

like oh my god because i talk about promise and i'll show all the time because i always get premature people calling in about it and like you know because yeah promise and it's a you explain what i explained your doctor so you know how do you explain it what you can do it too i can but i like when other people say things they've been me talking about promise because i've used it i've with men like it's amazing so what do you explain it? Well, I'm sure you can do it too. I can, but I like when other people say things, so they've got me talking about amounts because I've used it.

I've with meant, like it's amazing. So tell me your... The medicine is a very simple product. It is a patented type of lidocaine spray. And what that means is that it's not just straight lidocaine because anybody can smear some lidocaine jelly or something on themselves and maybe make them numb, but it wouldn't necessarily do what we want this product to do. And that is to sort of decrease the signal that's going to the brain that ultimately activates

the ejaculatory reflex. So by slowing that process, maybe giving a little bit more control, a man will be able to reach orgasm, ejaculation, more when he wants to, and do it together with his partner. The product is lighted came, but used in a way that is a special technology that makes it so that it is more apt to be absorbed down to the level of the skin where we want it, not just on the surface, we want nerves down below to receive

this drug. Right. And I think the advantage to it very clearly is that it doesn't transfer to the partner. For like she's not going to get, she's not going to feel anything. She won't even know he's using it, that's a thing. He would like 10 minutes, she doesn't have to feel anything that you want to know he's using it that's a thing you would like to minute she's left now that's correct i mean it it's it's uh... you know it's sprained on two or three sprays is usually all that necessary

i've had men who have needed more but not many i and uh... uh... it can be done ten minutes fifteen minutes before hand it can be wiped off if there's anticipated oral sex because it might be a little bit of a taste and they might not want that. But then they can simply adjust the dose to what works best for them. It doesn't have to be used every day. Right. And you can use it right away. You can decide.

But here's my question for you, though. So the thing about premature ejaculation is it's not only like if you're a minimat. It's like you could also be like, because because most women take like you know between what 14 18 minutes of an orgasm and if most even if you take six to eight minutes you're not going to be able to go with your partner so if you just want to last double what you last you want to last 12 minutes or you know something like that that would be a great way to use to for like the orgasm gap kind of close that gap this is important because there's a lot of guys out there who are

you know quote normal uh... and that normal for a man might be three to seven minutes and like you say women might be much much longer so called a rousal gap you know so she's left hanging and he's all done uh... so there are ways of course uh... make that happen uh... better in terms of how one engage in sexual activity but if it is too quick for a man just because he wants to be long longer there's no harm in

using this uh... it's not prescription i think that the other important point is that the man wants to get this right away they go online to pro-messons dot com and right they can order it and i love it i love it's been amazing because of the thing is that there's no other because for years years it's been coming out of me. The reason why I love this project is because I feel like that they're really, you know, you tell people to do kegels, you tell them to do the stamina training and all this stuff.

But a lot of times it's just a mixture of like psychological, it's a lot of things going on. And it's just, did you find before this promise that you were able to help help men like what would you tell them to do if they don't want to take Promise and the only thing we had was off label use of Anti-depressant medicine. Ah, that's the worst. I can't believe they give it They didn't works for men. I know but then you're like have all these side effects right? You'd be nauseated you can actually have difficulty getting an erection you can have Sleeping issues, but you can't ejaculate. have a lot of guy friend like a kidding major taking

like pros act as you jack at the problem for a man right so this is this actually keeps things much more on a normal level uh... and and uh... not having to take a pill everyday or to take a pill several hours before anticipated activity this is you know it doesn't you you know, work that well. And I think, you know, this was what the advantage was, you know, I had one patient. For many years, he would come in.

He was, he wasn't even a minute man. He would, oftentimes, ejaculate even before gaining... He was like, walked in the door and start, yeah. Boom, you know. And you know, poor guy, he was a prominent fellow here in Chicago and,... you know mature normal guy uh... and every year he would come come in say what's new larry would get

anything else for me uh... and i started using this product and i said she's let's try this and two weeks later he called me up and he was so excited because he was going from being like a three-second guy to now being a two-minute guy and so if we have that was you yeah he's like wow two minutes she even knew I even got my penis inside her and she yeah that's amazing and then what happened well I mean you know it was enormous for this fellow and of course what I also see with patients is that they oftentimes report that as

you know they continue to use the product they find that they can last longer longer so to your point earlier you know for fellow who's five minutes and and that's okay but he wants to be you know superman there and so carry it on longer because hey it's fun he has the opportunity to do that you know without remorse without closet cut itself any harm. Right, exactly. That's good. I love this. You're doing so. So what is your best advice for a woman who's dating a man with human-terrification? Like, she brings it up. A lot of times, guys, and I've shy love her. She's here.

She's also, she's a foreign porn star. She writes and gives advice to men and women about dating and stuff. But like, how should women handle it? Like, it's kind of awkward to use you don't want because a lot of times guys don't talk about it so what do you think that is a women's there's a hey baby's okay but here's a solution for you or well i think that's a good start uh... i think that's fine with it so really i'd uh... you know being supportive is certainly going to be a lot better than being you know critical and diminutive and

and uh... making the guy feel more embarrassed than he probably already is. And so, starting with the supportive idea and saying, listen, I just would just love having sex together and I just want to make it even that much more happy and successful and enjoyable. So, maybe we should talk to somebody. You can go online.

She gets the order and a bottle of a promise. Order and a bottle of a bottle of a promise. Happy birthday, babe. No, that's great. That's good because I feel like I'm glad to hear that men are coming forward more. I feel like, you know, because I've been doing this for eight years,

and I feel like it has been a topic that just more, you know, there's like different trends or things that are coming up, and this is another one that we hear about because there like it has been a topic that just more you know there's like different trends or things that are coming up and this is another one like that we hear about because there just hasn't been a solution so well thank you for all your good work doctor Lawrence of being is there a place of people can find you if they want to learn more about all of your amazing work sure you can my I think I have a website my office phone number is 312-563-5,000. And you can look me up online at Lawrence with a U-Large A. Levine, LEV-I-N-E. We'll give it all my website as well.

Great. I have, and I have Euro Partners as one of your websites too. Euro Partners is part of the big group and I'm and then maybe next time we can talk about paper on the street because that's one of my own i wanted to talk about that as well next time is there anything could we get like a quick quick rundown on it is that yeah sure uh... you know paper on the system

for them who don't know it is a deformity of the penis uh... that is caused by a scarring process typically triggered by some type of injury. Now most of the time that when a man remembers the injury, it's a sexual injury, but 80% of the men I see don't recall any event that really did it. And that's because the pressures can be so high in the penis during sexual activity. They don't even know it could be one of those out there and then they carry on.

Wow. And then within some times days to months later they'll start noticing a deformity. I've operated on two men today. Wow. Pardon me with the payaronies. One had an 85 degree curvature and the other had about a 65 degree curvature up and then to the left with a twist and narrowing and he was hindering all over.

And these were guys with normal erections that just had to unfortunately develop this problem. And it develops over time. Something happens, they don't treat it and then it gets worse over time. Yeah, sometimes the problem is that most people don't know what to do. Most doctors don't know what to do. And there is some evidence to suggest that getting things started early. Once the deformity starts can help prevent progression. And if you can stop it early, you might be able to not need to have anything

further done. Unfortunately, some men will just march on right through the process until the scarring stabilizes. So how can they find it? What are some signs real quick that men in case they don't know if they have it or not? Well, when it's only seen when they have an erection. Okay. In the erection, if the penis is curving any direction, most commonly upward, but it can go sideways or downward, they can have indentation. So the normal caliber of the shaft, the penis can have indentations in it,

like a wasting of sorts, like an hourglass thing, and the penis may buckle. Sometimes it's associated with erectile problems as well, diminished rigidity. Oh, okay. And in the early phase, a lot of men will also have pain when they get an erection. But the key finding is that that is that shape change in the p.m. probably one of the most devastating of all of these changes in shape is shortening. I have not met a guy yet and 30 years of practice who has come into my office and said hey doc make my penis shorter. Oh that's the

worst thing. I think if men's penis are getting shorter they become in your office and drove. Jesus Christ. Your phone is going to start ringing now. And this is truly something that is devastating for the man. And it can be devastating for the couple so not only is it a physical problem but it can be psychologically quite disturbing. And there's no cure unfortunately, but there are some new treatments that I have recently come out. There was a drug that was approved back in December called Zaeflex, and this is something

which is only administered by specialists in the field, but it's basically an enzyme which is injected into the scar tissue, which helps break it and it can help correct the deformity. Okay, and you've worked on all this. You've done a lot of work on this. I have. Okay, well everyone can find you on our website. Dr. Lawrence Vene, thank you so much for calling insects that MLA appreciate it. Okay, have a great night. Thank you. I think everyone, so I don't know, maybe next week we'll have the gynecologist call in. You know, I'll give people information on the parts.

Actually, there are a couple of guys in the business like that. Yeah. Then there's perform with it with. They have, they've, they've the curved penis. I think the curved penis is fine. It's a curved penis with like a, no, I'm talking about. There's two guys that I know that literally be on the normal curve. Oh my God, we should call Lawrence the lion.

Seriously. Um, okay. I want to talk about more about your, um, Catechicit and so and so you teach them the approach. So is it so they could on your website do you do work with these men one on one? You a book I mean or they buy your book and watch it. Well the website has multiple things that it offers. You can buy the book. You can also if you don't want to go into the actual seminar. You can do you can watch the video of the seminar. Okay. So you can purchase that or you can go to a live seminar that I set up or you can watch the video of the seminar. So you can purchase that or you can go to a live seminar that I set up or you can do one-on-one consulting and work one-on-one with the other.

So what do you find is the biggest sort of, so I always say this too, comes out of confidence, you gotta be coming. And there's some men like, you know, good-looking, smart, well-traveled, you know, successful, but they just can't. So is this, I mean, it must be hard. They come to you because they're probably like in this desperate or they come great because they're like, I need help. I know this problem.

I can't talk to women, right? Um, usually, you know, it's funny. I do everything else, but, you know, a lot of the guys at first, they're very uncomfortable like, I'm going to go to her and ask her about how to build up a relationship. But what I've done is I've actually posted place in places, actual people that I've actually worked on. And now some people, it's changing their entire look

because they just, they might need a makeover. They need a makeover and they don't know what to do. Some people, they don't need the makeover and they're well put together, great jobs, but they just don't have the game or know what to say. So then I teach them the way to approach girls. And with them, I took big, big, big take them to a restaurant

or bar or cafes and stuff. And I test them out in the actual field. You're like, go talk to her now. Or the guy's so nervous at first. I've seen guys. First they are nervous, but after a while, they start getting more comfortable. Usually when I do that, usually about the fourth, fifth time

the guy confronts someone It's it works. It works. He's got it down So these guys you might be rejected just know that you're gonna be rejected pretend 20 times before it's good Let's just say to people it's fine. You live You're not gonna go out at night and you approach let's say five to ten girls Anticipate 50% of them are going to turn you down. It's fine, and it's okay You know how many fell, you woke up. It's better to ask five to see which one's going to say, yeah, then she'd not ask any and then go home alone anyway.

Exactly. And then you feel bad, you beat yourself up. Okay, but you also talk about that, which I like, it's not just getting the woman in that chick, but then how to keep her, how to have a relationship. So what are some of your tips for that? Because a lot of these other people teach like, here's how you get the number, here's how you get laid, but you're like, no, here's a holistic process about. You know, what's funny is,

one of the parts that I put in there is, and we talked a little bit about it earlier, we as women say, we want a guy who's attentive to us, and we want them to text us, and we want them to do calls to us, everything else. But when a guy calls us too quickly, it's like, oh, Oh yeah, really, like, you're calling me again. You already called me again. Wow.

And or you'll go and you send a text and you see someone texting you really fast. And we say we like it, but then when it happens, like, God, how many times is God going to text me? He's exactly, you know, that's the thing. I mean, he just dropped me off from dinner and now he's texting me immediately. So we have a tendency to do that.

So I give the tactics of when it's okay to call a girl, when it's okay to tax pressure so that he can time limit everything so he's not so needy. Because as much as women say they want those things, they don't. They don't, wait a second. I'm gonna guide the summer at a party and he, I met him that night, gave my number.

I thought he was fine, interesting. He texted me that night to make sure I got a home okay, which is a good tactic like a minimum party like just a checker. You okay? But then in the morning, he called me left a message, texted me and sent me an email. That's too much. I was like, I deleted him faster than I could even, you know, before I even brushed my teeth, that one. I was like, really? And the thing is a lot of guys, the woman in a relationship, this is normal. No, it's not normal to want, it's like when a woman consistently knows that a guy's going to always call her. He's always, she feels

like, okay, I already have this in the bag, but what if there's someone better out there? Right. So I already know I have him. I'll keep him on the sidelines. And then I'm going to go look for Mr. Right. He's like Mr. Nice Guy friend zone, whatever he turns it to a friend zone. So basically I teach him all the tactics to make sure he doesn't fall in the friend zone and how to keep her so that she's consistently interested and that she doesn't feel like he's whipped. So it makes her consistently. Even if he is. He's like, I don't want to call her. It gives him that control. Okay, God, and you

think all of that stuff is what works. So what about just being a better listener or asking questions or being attentive in that way? Like some guys just what about those skills? To be honest with you, those goals are based on the girls. Yeah. Because there are some girls that don't want to communicate. That's true. And there are some girls who like, okay, please just don't listen, just shut up and leave

me alone. It depends on the girl. I mean, I communicate very well with my husband, but there's times I'm like, you know what, I just really rather you not say anything and we'll just deal with it later. You know, so I honestly think communication communication that's based on each individual person that you're dating, right? Because everybody has a different level of what they're more comfortable with. Do you ever teach any sex tips to the guys?

Um, the tech, not really. I mean, to be honest with you, the only sex tips you really need to know is making sure you don't rush into sex, making sure you have four-plate girl, especially when she versus with the guy, she's more fascinated by that making out and that's hashing and that, oh my God, because she really, really wants to have sex with you, but you're making her wait for it. And that usually draws her in a lot faster

than you actually just saying, I'm gonna go and put it in and call her back. Exactly. In fact, when you do that, when you walk in the door and like you don't even touch our breasts and you unzip our pants and try to stick it in we are not excited We are happy. We didn't even know you walked in the room What happened great and the four-placian that just be the before the first time you've sex the longer that men Employee four-play can make out making out like the first thing that goes in relation. I listen

I'm completely turned on by make-outs. Right. I would rather have makeouts than sex. And my husband and mother have makeouts and blow jobs than sex. So it's perfect. So perfect man he found. Yeah. So it's like, oh, let's just make out. I can give you a blow job. Great. Perfect.

Exactly. Whatever it is, it works. I don't need to put it back the whole time. Because for me, sometimes just I orgasm and it sounds really weird. I can really wet. Right. From when I'm making out with a man. And sometimes you'll go and it goes straight into sex without that make out and then you're

drawing you try to figure out how to keep yourself away. Exactly. If she's wet, she's not wet yet. When you go down there, then you need to go back up and do other stuff. Back up and do other stuff. Yeah, retreat, retreat. You need to do nothing. You need to do enough. Go back, go back.

That's the guy's such a, that's so easy. I don't know why I bend, don't, that is the best advice I've ever given. She's not wet. You're not doing your job. Yeah. But some women don't get that wet. Some women have. But you still get some. That's why you use. Rub. But you get some moisture. But you should know if she's turned on. She wears her breath quickening. You want to get the point where she's begging you. She literally can't wait for you to do. You don't want to be like, no, don't. I mean, there's just I just even if you see someone for a while, I have a text they'd scroll right for the pants. Like still touch my breath. Still make out with me. Still. I remember. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, out. I'm like, do. I'm like, seriously, just just want that. I'm like, just, can you kiss my neck

and do a little bit of four play while I'm doing additions? And that way by the time you're done kissing the neck, I'm sitting there leaving the dishes and saying, okay, I'm ready to go. Right, good advice. That is just it. Did you do that? Yeah, he listens.

See, now he knows, right? Now he knows and now he doesn't just go and jump in. It's so simple. It's like communication. This is how you learn your part. Like couples don't talk about this other than years ago, but I just like, you've only kissed my neck, right? And then you got a divorce and you could just kiss your neck.

Okay, let's talk about your neck. Also, how to land a rich man. I'm going to use for gold diggers? No. And I'm going to read, I created the title because we knew it would catch attention. It is a good title. So that's why the title is there. It's like sex with Emily.

I don't have sex actually. I just talked about it. It's talking about it. Yeah. But the book is about how to make yourself a better version of you to attract financially secure men. And a rich man is based on the level of a girl. So to someone, a rich man can be someone

who makes $100,000. To someone else, it might be someone who makes $1 million, $3 million. So when someone when someone looks at the book, it's not merely just about rich men in general, like multi multi millionaires, it's based on each level of the girl. So they can use it against them. But it talks about you ever go like, for instance, you're with your girlfriend. I'm giving you the perfect example.

You're with your girlfriends and you're at a party and everything else and you look at your girlfriend like, God, she looks great. Oh, I love her shoes. And you start admiring little things about each woman in a room. The reason why we do that is because we wish that there was a part of us that was like each one every one of those girls to make ourselves better. And what I teach in the book is how to go and make yourself that better person that you always look at someone else And you're like, oh, I want that I teach that to a woman so that she can become that and Teaching them that rich men do not want girls who are not financially secure and by financial secure I'm not saying you have to make a ton of money, right? These are the men that you're gonna ask pair of rich men are happy if you make

$20,000 a year right because the ones that you're going to ask for a rich man are happy if you make $20,000 a year. Right. Because that shows that you're trying. Right. Exactly. So, but it's waiting around for some sugar dad. Exactly. So for them, it teaches what rich men are looking for. You know, they want to back it's so funny because you go

back 10 years. 10 years ago as well. I rich man wanted a beautiful face. Now, if you ask majority of the rich men, they would say, well, a beautiful face depreciates any other asset. And now they're looking for more substance with that beautiful face. So I change, or they divorce her and get someone younger.

No, a lot of rich men that I'm around, and I'm around a lot of them. A lot of them are actually wanting substance now. That's I love to hear that. So becoming moving towards a more substance control. Exactly. So the book teaches you how to create more substance, how to fit into their world,

how to understand and educate yourself all the different things so that you can actually speak instead of stunning like some dumb Barbie doll. Right. So it's training for women also to build something. It's a comfortable way. Training to make a woman better for herself So that she can find that financial secure guy. So but it's a really then the day though

She's looking for a guy to take care of her is that why she want you're you just saying that men who are successful and financially Someone who's It's good the guy we say like it my age where I'm at I'm like I wanted a day to guy who's successful I don't care if he's like a gazillion air but because I I'm, you know, you want to date someone who's, so that's the aspirational part of it. I don't want to get in a job and he was lying around not doing anything. Exactly. I wouldn't be interested in just doing something like what are you doing? It's not a goal digging book. It's, I want to make sure whoever I date is either the same

as me or better. Right. I don't want to date someone below me. And it's nothing that I'm being this rude obnoxious person is to be honest most divorces happen because of financial issues. Right. Because it's financial. It's financial.

So you basically are going to end up in a divorce if you're fighting about money, you can't pay the bills. So if you can avoid that by securing yourself a financial secure guy, you know what? Yes, there's love and marriage. Yes, there's, you know's passion and all those things. But how many times you see Richman going and saying, I need you to sign a prenup. That makes it a business arrangement.

Exactly. So why as a woman, you can't go in there and be a little bit more strategic and be like, the same way you're being strategic about your money, I'm being strategic about the men that I choose. Right, so if he asks you for a prenup, he say no. I don't think there's anything wrong with the man

asking for a prenup. But then you're not even getting his success. I guess asks you for a prenup, you say no. I don't think there's anything wrong with the man asking for a prenup. But then you're not even getting his success. I guess if you don't get divorced, I'm just, I jump to the fact that he's going to get you to get you to go to the pool. No, because if you, first of all, in any prenup, you put clauses in. He cheats on you as this. If you've been married for this period of time, you get a certain amount. Right.

But to be honest, a prenup is anything that he's made before. That doesn't mean that a non-stri- Oh, right. Any time. Exactly. That he's made before that doesn't mean that I mean That I'm right and it's not Exhausted that he's just hiding it once you get married. No, just so really but what No, but what are the so so so you're saying to women like if you haven't thought because I guess a lot of them Maybe think it's a wealthy guys beneath me. He'll look at me in a certain way But because I never thought about that. I mean, I like I've dated guys with money. I've dated artists I've dated everyone but I never prioritize thatized that because now that I have had more success, it's just nicer, I don't want

to be paying for dinner a little time. But I know what you're saying. And also, I think that's interesting is that you can learn, I have a lot of wealthy friends and I've dated men. And mostly the men I've dated with money, I admire them usually for what they're usually like self-made or they've created something or they're passionate about their job. If you're successful, it's not even just about the money, it's like you really excel at

something and that's sexy, the fact that you're passionate and you love what you do and you've created this amazing job, this wealth, whatever it is. That's attractive in a way that's even more than you can go by me, this dress that I really want at Barney's, which I actually really do want. But you know what? Which is great. I mean, you know what's the good thing about with this finding a rich man thing? The girls will go and they'll say, okay, I want this rich guy and everything else. But you're asking me to change so much about myself. And I'm like, well, just think about it. If you start changing certain things to make yourself better and this rich guy gets

attracted to you, he's going to help you grow to be better. So at one point, you're no longer going to need this rich guy because of your own growth and what he brings in a table. He brings an example of what they change. Give me an example of like the top thing to things that you tell women to change. They have work on about themselves. One is presence. And I'm not saying you have to be absolutely beautiful because if you go and Google a lot of these rich men, you don't see the most beautiful princesses on their side.

But keep yourself maintained, making sure you work out, you dress up nice, you wear your hair and you make up nice, you have to maintain yourself, period. That's one, to educate yourself. That would be most important. Learn a little bit about arts, politics, economics, everything, because when you're in these environments, you're gonna have these discussions and if all you can say is uh uh uh

They're not gonna give you time and day. They're just gonna think oh, you're just some dumb girl that they're keeping around right and the whos device president Exactly and the third thing is and even if you're making 10 15 20,000 Keep your debt ratio low 20,000, keep your debt ratio low. A guy wants a woman that he doesn't have to worry about. That's a key background check on you. Exactly. So you can make a little bit of money, but try to keep your debt as low as possible so that he sees that you're actually, you're working on making sure you're financial secure,

and that attracts them to you a little bit more, because then he does not worry about you by seeing and spending his money. Okay. That's great advice for women, I guess, all around, that they should feel good about, because that will give them confidence, because we're just saying that men sometimes don't have a lot of confidence to ask out women

that women aren't secure about their looks, their way, maybe they have their financial position and they don't feel good about themselves, so they don't feel that they're worthy for someone to date. And that's most of the time when people are not in relationships, because they feel but about themselves, so they don't feel that they're worthy for someone to date. And that's most time I went with people are not in relationships because they feel better about themselves, men and women. I have this girlfriend of mine,

and she was gonna date a really good friend of mine, and it was like the perfect relationship. I was like, I got this, they're gonna be together. And she ruined it, and I asked her, why did you ruin it? She goes because he's above my status. Oh, right. And I'm like, she can't flush your dessert.

What do you mean? I'm like, you were exactly perfect for what he was looking for. And she's like, yeah, but he's above me. He's this. And I said, that's the problem. You can't think that they're above you. You got to make sure that you guys are equal. And it doesn't matter that he makes more money than you. If you can mess with his mind and make him feel that he's you're challenging his brain, then guess what? He's not above you then. Exactly.

Now you're any, don't even think like that. Like I never think that anyone is ever above me or below me. I don't, I don't, I, my, my, my, but that's still my mind works. I've never done that with anyone, but if you can somehow switch your thinking, I think it comes from maybe you're upbringing or with your parent or whatever. I don't know. I'm glad you learned to hear like that. They, they are constantly comparing themselves to others.

Mm-hmm. And you just got to, every time you find yourself going off in those spaces where you're feeling bad about yourself, I always tell you, if you can catch yourself in that thought and like say three positive things yourself or whatever, because it's your mind. I say it's never good to say anything negative about yourself. Right. Exactly. You should always go and determine what your positive to do a list of things you want to change and things that you like and work off that

list but don't make negatives because if you have negatives and a negative process is working your head and that's what drives you to make the wrong choices. Exactly, because you don't exactly. So even before you get in a relationship you need to do some of this work on yourself before you can find a healthy person for you. Because when you're not healthy you're like half a person and you're going to find someone else who's half a person because they haven't done their work and then you're going to end up and maybe you'll make one person but it won't be a very good couple.

I'll tell you that. So okay, Shylove, thank you so much for being on the show. I so appreciate it. People can find you at moneylovesuccess.com. You have a lot going on there. They can get your books, your programs. They can get books, programs, seminars, one-on-one consultations. You can also call 1-844-4 Success,

which is my direct line to my company to speak to me. I love it. Well, thank you so much for being the show. It's awesome. And also one more thing I have to say is another one of our sponsors that we have to just give a shout out to is which is why I can do the show for you is the very best number one male selling sex toy,

which is a flashlight. Have you ever used a flashlight in your career or see it? No, but I have a couple of girlfriends that have flashlight with their names on it. They do. Right. Exactly. So it feels like having sex for men. Even if you don't have a partner, the flashlight is the most popular male sex toy. It simulates the sensations of sex. It was engineered to look and feel like the real deal. And some guys think it feels better than the sex. I mean, I hope it doesn't.

I hope you like that sex too. But go to sexelmy.com slash flashlight to get your flashlight that's sexwithemily.com slash flashlight. And also, it helps people with stamina, guys with stamina who don't last long enough, like we were talking about earlier. And I just gave one to a friend. He's like, I'd leave my wife if it could cook, if it could cook. So check that out.

Shylove, thank you so much for the show. Thanks to Anderson for being so wonderful for you. And anything else you have to say Anderson? Very noisy and there's a lot of chatter going on. What's going on? We got love line coming out. I don't know what. New film vault for film listeners, film viewers, film watchers. Film vault is for podcasts. Film vault, if you can hear me over Drew over Drew, Henry, but we did summer preview.

Which is a really good episode. All the five biggest movies you need to know about. Everyone check it. Okay, thanks everyone for listening of 5M Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Sex with Emily. And thanks so much for listening to Sex with Emily. Was it good for you? email me, feedback at sexwithemley.com.

Hi, I'm Emily, the host of Sex with Emily. Good vibrations carries the hottest toys and vibes. I love the Jeju Mimi because it's discreet, it's extremely powerful and great for couple sites. Find out how much pleasure your body can really handle. Use coupon code Emily for 15% off at sexwithemley.com slash good vibes. Perhaps play a little game called just a tip. Just for a second, just to see how it feels.

Hey, this is Jordan Harbinger, host of the Art of Charm Podcast, the number one dating and relationship advice podcast in iTunes. I'm Emily Morris, host of the Sex with Emily Podcast, the number one sex and relationship podcast on iTunes and it's sexwithemily.com. And this is just the tip. You know, something that I never thought that I would be a fan of that, you know, cropped up a little bit lately is dirty talk. You know, and it's funny because every guy's like, I totally do that, or they're like, I never do that. But I feel like you change, you can fall right into this, and sometimes it can be pretty awesome.

Exactly. I think that couples, you know, you're right. It's not for everyone, but the couples who do get into it, I think can really be that extra spice that a relationship needs. And also, the brain is our largest sex organ truly. Especially for women, we want to hear words. We do want to be turned on. I mean, they might, in dirty talk, a great way to start, I always say, is describe a situation, describe it as it's happening. So, you feel so great right now, or I love the way I feel inside you. I mean, it doesn't have to be like, you don't have to get into like the hardcore, whatever. But you can just start by, you know know describing what's happening in the moment.

Right it doesn't have to be like disgusting. Yeah or explaining what you'd like to do. Like I can't wait to get home tonight and take your clothes off. Yeah. I mean whatever. I mean that's like starting a starting point but just drive the things that you're thinking except for those other things that you're thinking. Right except for whatever you're going to share your true feelings and show up on.

Right. Just like I can't wait to see you later. You look so hot when you're at this morning. Like it just can start in small ways you later. You look so hot when you're at this morning like it does can start in Small ways right exactly. Okay, so cool. And how do you test the watersh for this like maybe whisper something in her ear like Hey, I can't wait to get you home later and then see if she's like, oh, that's hot or if she's like Manger matters exactly and then if she does that. Yeah, she might not be she might not be She might not be she might not be she might not be Canada But you know, I also know people who sexed all the time and they're like, oh, yeah

I sent this girl really had tax and she was like didn't respond or she was like smiley face He's like there. I knew I was like shut down Linky like link you're not contributing to the sex. I guess this isn't gonna happen So you got to test it out for a picture of my dick winky face right right or she bleeds your number right Do's quote unquote loses your number right if you guys want to learn more from the art of charm about dating relationships and even networking for business visit us at the art of charm podcast dot com or check us out in iTunes and follow me on Twitter at the art of charm and check out the second Emily podcast at sex with Emily dot com

and iTunes if you want to have the best sex of your life that is also follow me on Twitter at sex with Emily the cast at sexwithemily.com and an iTunes if you want to have the best sex of your life that is. Also, follow me on Twitter at sexwithemily.