Sex With Emily - Three Guys Talk Sex

Episode Date: September 12, 2017

This is a Sex With Emily first! We know how much you love roundtable shows with lovely ladies, but today’s a roundtable of three real and down-to-earth guys to talk all things sex and relationships! Emily is joined by Chad, Hartwick, and Gavin– three guys having fun in the single lane. From dating apps to casual sex to what makes for a bad blowjob, the crew covers it all. Emily gets these guys to open up about their best sexual experience and what they’ve yet to cross off their sexual bucket list. So, if you’ve ever wanted to know what real men actually think about sex, tune in! Thank you for supporting our sponsors who help keep the show FREE: Adam & Eve, Womanizer, Intensity, System JO Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thanks for listening to Sex with Emily. On today's show, I'm joined by three incredibly open and honest guys who aren't afraid to let me into their sex and dating lives. We're talking what they really think about casual sex. Why shouldn't fear an uncircumcised penis? They're unexpected threesomes and how to find the male g-spot. All this and more, thanks for listening. Look into his eyes. They're the eyes of a man obsessed by sex. Eyes that mock our sacred institutions. Betrubized they call them in a fight on day. Hey, Avaline, you got a boyfriend?

Because my man E here, he just got his heart broken, he thinks you're kind of cute. The girls got every standard. Oh my! The women know about shrinkage. Isn't it common, not only? What do you mean, like laundry? It shrinks. Can we're talking about sex relationships and everything in between for more information go to sexwithemlee.com where you can check out the podcast, we're now available on iHeartRadio app, which is awesome. And we're on Spotify, Google Play, SoundCloud, iTunes, and everywhere you find podcasts. And so thank you to all my new listeners. I know there's a lot of you, so welcome.

Welcome to the sector family family. And also another announcement you guys, you're going gonna be happy to know that my iPhone app, KiggleCamp is now back in the store. I know, I know, it was really stressful there for a few months. I feel you, we had to take it down to update it, but now it's like brand spanking new. So thanks everyone for emailing and for downloading it.

Checking it out. Okay, I'm thrilled. This is the first section, the section that I'm gonna show show I'm actually on nervous. Not really nervous. Well, a little bit. No, you guys, this is not a whole new jam. Okay, so we did a show a few weeks ago.

We had three women in the studio. And I've done a few of these. I've had the women female round tables that come out. I think it's going to be called it real women talk sex. So that was a great show. You guys loved it. And we just had a bunch of women sitting around

who I just met. And we talked a lot about sex and relationships and dating. The purpose of that show was so we can all kind of get inside the minds of what women want, what they like in the bedroom, what they're into, we got into it. And it was a really fun show. A lot of surprises in that one. And so I thought, you know what? I got some dudes in here. I got to get some guys in here. I want to hear what men are thinking. We all want to know what's really in the minds of men, don't we? So I rounded up some guys. They all have beards. It was not on purpose.

I don't know that I did not know them before today. They're sweethearts and they're ready to talk. They seem sweet. I'm really excited they're here. Welcome to the show guys. I'd love you. I have a first question to bring you in to the show here. Tell me your name, your age, your relationship status, and about the last time you had sex. Who wants to start? I'm the youngest, so I'll go ahead and start. My name is Gavin, I'm 26, I am single, the last time I had sex was two weeks ago.

Okay, and thank you, tell me about it. Sure, so I had gone out on a Sunday day date with a girl that I had been kind of going back and forth with. We used to work together and we just been starting to hang out a little more friendly level since she's not working at the company anymore. And we went to a couple of bars. We ended up getting trashed. I went back to her place. And it was just an awesome evening of drunken hookup and just got pretty sloppy, which can be fun. But yeah, I've... Have you talked to her since? I have talked to her since, yeah.

This isn't even, this is like a rapid-fire growup, but I have so many questions for you. Okay, yeah. Wait, no, but I'm not gonna get into them now, but will you see her again? I hope so, definitely, yeah. Okay, good, that's a great one to start, okay. Yeah.

No judgment, not that it was grave. If yours wasn't great, that's good. No, mine was good. Okay, good, tell me. Yeah, my name's Chad. I'm 33. The last time was probably about two or three weeks ago, on a date with a girl that I had been frequently seeing,

we hung out in the area that I live in, and went to a few bars, went to dinner, and and everything and then just kind of went back to my place. It was the first time she had ever been to my apartment. It was pretty standard stuff, just kind of, you know, after day, making out session and then... Sex. Yeah, and just went into that and then it was, hey, we both have to work tomorrow morning. So she left. The last time we had had sex before that,

she kind of freaked out about me staying the night over her place, which I had permission to do, but she woke up the next morning, was like, oh no. Why? I don't know. Maybe I'm a snore, I don't know. Oh my god.

Yeah, she was like, this is moving too fast. I don't, and I was like, I just want to bang you, but I don't want you to see over. Yeah, which I don't have. I don't have that. I'm toothbrush. Yeah.

I'm down with. But yeah. Interesting. Yeah, she was like, man, I'm so tired. I don't want to go home. I. Yeah, which I don't have that's a toothbrush. Yeah, I'm down with. But you don't, interesting. Yeah, she was like, man, I'm so tired. I don't want to go home. I was like, you can stay here if you want. And she was like, no, no, no, no. Oh, she hasn't just see bovers. Okay.

That was kind of her thing. So that was fine with me. Okay. And you're gonna see her again? Yeah, yeah, we were supposed to see each other within this next week. Yeah. Got it.

All right. My name's Heartwick, I'm 29. The last time I had sex was, I don't know, Thursday? Or? Okay, so. What day is it? Last Thursday? So like, so like, yeah, like last time we could do.

No, I don't know. Doesn't matter. A couple days ago. Okay, nice. How old were you, did you say you were? 29. 29, okay. Almost 30.

Okay. It was fantastic. It was this girl that I had met at a party like months ago and didn't go anywhere or whatever. And then I just kind of like bugged her because I thought she was cool. And we went and got a beer like a couple of weeks ago. And then like she, for lack of a better term,

like just completely rocked my world that night. And then so we met up a couple more times. And the most recent time was with her again. On Thursday, wait, wait, I thought that was- Maybe it was new, it might have been on the weekend, it might have been Monday, I can't remember. No, right, I'm about to move so my life's real weird right now, so I can't remember what it is.

Right, and really fucking good, so. Yeah, it's kinda great. Oh my God, okay, heartwink. Yes. How did you rock your world? Sometimes you just meet someone where your body's kind of work together. And there's just fit.

Yeah, as corny as that sounds. No, it's not. Guys just say that. There's no thought. And it's just good. Whole ton of orgasms on both sides. Right. With minimal work is the wrong word.

It was just kind of that happened. Yeah, yeah. It was just kinda down. I love that. Yeah, it was just cool. I don't know how else to put it. So when you said that you kind of bothered her, you met her at a party a few weeks ago, you thought she was hot, and then you're like,

I was in a good conversation. My life was kinda chaotic at the time. So I was like, I'm not gonna make this even more chaotic. And then things calmed down, so I kinda hit her up. And I was just like, hey, you were really cool. You want to like go hang out.

Like with no ulterior motives, I swear. Like it was literally just like, I- It's fine if you, but let's be honest, don't we all go out? I have done that. We all do what it's like. I just mean I was like, this girl's real cool. I'd like to like see if she's up to, like her work is real rad and everything.

So I was like, I wonder what she's doing. Okay. And then we ended up at her house. Got it, cool. You know, to the orgasm. And you're certain they were orgasms. Oh yeah. Yeah.

Did you go down on her? Yes. You did. Of course. Of course, see, I wish everyone felt that way. So I'm wondering was oral sex involved in your escapades, Gavin? It was not. No, we just got straight to business, which is a little rare for me because I usually do like some good

for-play like that. There was a shower scene involved. Oh, oh my god, I'm a huge fan of shower sex. Which I liked. Really? Before? After, after. Yeah, because it was, it's been pretty hot recently and there's no air conditioning in a apartment. When I get to work, I get pretty sweaty. So just for the sake of her apartment and my smell. Okay. Just where we ended up and turned out to be pretty great.

Okay. So when you said that oral sex is usually involved, did she go down on you? She did not. No. Okay. Do you like performing oral sex? I do. Yeah.

I don't mind it at all. I like it. I think it's a good way to transition into things and especially in the progression of The hookup in general. It's a good way to just kind of set the mood especially to get the girl going and I I don't know. It's just something I enjoy and do Okay, just because some guys are like think they like it, but they're not sure like they're not sure if she's into it No, there's all sex as a whole. I could you an entire show when you guys going down?

How about how about you? Chad yeah, there was there was some on on her end Not a mine not that I would objected to it, but you know, that's just how it went so you went down on her No, oh sure and you're in yeah, okay, so she went down to you and you would have gone down on her But she said no or just kind of escalated to sex. You're like, hey, hard, right? It's just that escalated to sex at that point. Yeah.

Okay. It just kind of, the two experiences that I had with her just kind of went from straight to kissing, straight from her performing oral sex on me, straight to sex. There was no like conversation or lag time in between the end. Yeah. Okay. Have you ever got a bad blow job or is it like pizza?

Like no such thing as bad pizza. Like, what's a bad blow? I've never been in a high school.? I'm gonna go into high school. Right, okay, but forget high school. Yeah, I've definitely got that. Like in recent years. What's a bad blowjob? Can you just explain what it's like?

Maybe I've been lucky, but I have. I can talk at Great Length about this. Because I've had a handful of them, unfortunately. I can probably safely say that the bad ones usually involve too much teeth. Teeth is like the number one thing I tell people, like no, I learned that. Oh yeah, well I wish you had spoken. You're in to see that's a thing. Yeah, the kind of thing though, you bring it after you know the basics, and then you can nibble and bring the teeth in, but you don't start with the teeth. Exactly, and that's the thing. You can put your lip over your teeth. Too much teeth is the key word there.

It's too much. It becomes like scraping. I would say that probably the worst one that I've ever had, a girl had a tongue ring that she decided to stick the part of her tongue ring into the head of, or the, yeah, it's right. It was into the hole into your right. And this is several years ago But she and I had hooked up several times and I finally had to ask her to stop doing that

She was like she was like but you're squarming and I'm like no, yeah That's the pain. Yeah, it's so hard though Cuz you don't know it right so hard tell That's a hard one Gavin. It's got to be the right area that needs to be stimulated, the right motion as well as opposed to just sucking on it, but yeah, teeth obviously can hurt. What else besides teeth? I'm just thinking it's like,

I feel like maybe if she thought blow jobs she took it literally and she blew her. Right. You know, but it's always a teeth. It's like high school. I feel like I need to do a public service announcement or something, but I feel like the thought people knew this already.

Right, well, I mean, that's like recycling. In my mind mind the bad ones are the ones that hurt That's it like if it doesn't hurt I can I can sit back and enjoy myself no problem But if you're hurting me that's when it becomes bad guys that's really thank you Illuminate I've always wanted literally always want to know and they guess that the follow up to that would we'll get to this later It's like what is bad sucks, but what's your preferred way to meet women? Anyone, the apps?

I'm on everything. I'm on every, every one of the apps, I go out a lot. That's the best. Drunkenly at bars or just to get introduced through mutual friends? Okay, cool. Cool.

Yeah, I don't know that just chaos of You need a phone, right? I have a phone, but I don't have any of the apps or anything like that. Okay, so just like proximity. I don't know where. Okay, so you guys write out you're all dating. It sounds like casualty. You're not in like a serious relationship.

What's going on with casual sex these days? Like, do you, you're all engaging casual sex? So, do you feel like you're moving toward, when you're having sex, you're like, oh, like, do you, you're all engaging casual sex? So, do you feel like you're moving toward your having sex? You're like, oh, God, are you looking at these? I'm going, maybe she could be my wife. I could have a baby with a child. You're like, oh, I'm just kind of dating around. Like, what is going on with you guys? I don't understand.

Personally, like, I just got out of a really long thing. So, no, not at all. And not in a negative way. I'm not like, oh, God, I want to get away from this person as soon as we stop having sex, but it's just like not really on my mind. Okay. Well, you're moving, you're in tension. And generally the people I'm sleeping with,

I can tell they're kind of in the same place. So it's like, how can you just assume? We've probably talked about it. Okay, you talked about it. Yeah, I'm pretty open. I'm like, look, I'm about to move. I got out of a long thing. I'm not trying. Like, what about you guys. I'm like, look, I'm about to move. I got out of one thing. I'm not trying.

What about you guys, Chad, Gavin, when you're dating right now, like I know about your last sexual experiences, because we're all that close. But do you have a rotation going on? Is there a looking curve? I don't have a rotation. Yeah, I mean, I'll usually date if I find someone that I'm interested in continuously dating,

then I'll just kind of stick with that. I try my best not to have any conversation about it, like, you know, oh, are we exclusive or anything like that? Never? No, because I mean, I don't care if they date other people. I'm so busy with work and projects and stuff like that. I don't think I could juggle more than just one person. This woman you set with the other less two weeks ago.

So you wouldn't date anyone else right now? I'm not actively looking today. Because she kind of, not because you wouldn't if you met someone, but you're just kind of like that. So I've got it. And for you, you feel like juggling a lot of women would be kind of, I think that would, yeah, I think that sounds incredibly stressful, you know, more power to you if you guys do it. But you know, Gavin. It's a good question. I mean, I try to keep a rotation of three to four hookups that I can go to either just to go out on dates with, have fun with, you know, not necessarily have the commitment of being in an exclusive relationship, but having the freedom of, you know, keeping it casual, which can be a tricky thing to navigate because there are times where

things can be said, he to the moment that may not necessarily be totally meant, but- Like, come inside me and I want your child. But exactly. Hey, when that happens. Yeah, it happens to the best of us, so. But your intention could be to get a certain response that you want, but it may not necessarily be. What come on forwards around it, Gavin, what do you mean? What I mean is, like she was like,

I love you and you're like, and I'm gonna say I love you too. And but then, yeah. That's me, okay. Got it. So right now you've got three or four women, rotation. How do you decide on a given night? Like let's say you leave here, who are you gonna call?

Who are you in taxes? Is it someone who do, how do you sort that out of you? Like, well, I just saw her yesterday. But number, you know, the other one I haven't seen, but how do you rotate? There's a lot of factors that go into it. I think mainly it's just kind of, what's gonna be most convenient.

There are preferences that I have in terms of who I, like Tommy. So, break it down. So the more recent hookup that I've had has definitely been something a little more exciting for me because it's a girl that I used to work with and I had a crush on. And then when we work together, I always wanted to maintain a level of professionalism and not necessarily be the guy that's going to go and hit on every girl that I work with

or at least come off that way. But then what the top work is. Because you see Grillear. Well, not true. Not true. I'm not your boss. You know, when she left the company, it kind of opened the door for this, you know, to be able to hang out with her on a more friendly or casual basis.

With that, it was, there's like a level of excitement to it and that it was like this thing that was almost forbidden. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Cause you have that sexual tension building. Like, that's the, don't you think it's such the best part? Almost can be better than the sex sometimes. Well, yeah, and then there's,

there's, there was like, not better, but it feels up sometimes. It's different, but it can be better. It can be better than sex. It's the second place. It can be better sometimes, but that's hopefully it's not sometimes it is. You're like, oh, that was the best part,

and you caught them, but maybe not that aggressively. Well, yeah, I mean, just looking back, like there were times where she would ask me, hey, can you help me move this box over into this closet over here? And so I'd go in there and then we'd be in the closet there, it worked together, and the only thing running through my mind is like, all right, just make a move on,

or let's fuck this closet right now. That would be awesome, but then I'd just be like, oh, well, my cause to problems are not working right now. But now you are sleeping with her. Yeah, we hooked up, yeah. Okay. And how is it? It was great.

Yeah, it was really stoked because it was kind of like this long buildup of. But now though, there's still three other women. There's four total. Does she know about the other women? No. And then they don't bring it up. Because Chad, you were saying that you don't

ever have that talk. The exclusive conversation, right? Right. Yeah. His whole situation stressing me out. Right. Right. But do they bring it up to you? Would you order to have a seat with anyone else?

Would you tell the truth, Gavin? Yes. I want to be honest. It's okay, if you don't. I would want to be honest. I absolutely would want to be honest. The learn's gone, honestly. I think that I am pretty open honest. I would want to be honest. I absolutely would want to be honest. I think that I am pretty open to how I approach things

and also think that with my intentions and just how I communicate, I'm not acting in a way that I want to have an exclusive relationship with any particular woman that I'm seeing or that I'm with. Okay, can I say something about that? So when you said you're not acting in a particular way, would you say even if you had amazing sex with X-Worker all and you actually wanted to see the next night you're like, that's gonna send the wrong message if I ask her out. If I slept with her

on a Wednesday, if I ask her on Friday, that's gonna be too close together and I have someone else in a rotation. Don't answer. Okay, we're gonna take a break. When we come back, we have to find out how many chicks are you banging? Everyone, thank you for supporting our sponsors, keeping the show free, and I love you all. Howard, tell me who you're sleeping with, how many, what's going on? It's so hard to answer right now, because I'm literally about to move. You're leaving, I get it. So, prior to the move, in the last month.

Two, no three. Okay, three. Yeah. And casual. You're leaving. I get it. So, prior to the move in the last month. Two, no three. Okay, three. Yeah. And casual. Yeah, yeah. Very much so. Yeah, and openly so. So you say, listen, just so you can. Yeah, yeah.

And when you have that, I wonder when you guys have that. Well, fucking terrible liar. And I get brutal, horrible guilt if I feel like I'm being an asshole. Okay. Which I think is a good quality, but also like negatively affects my life. So pretty much I try to eliminate any amount of his heart with being an asshole as much as possible. Okay.

Even if it's uncomfortable in the moment, if that makes sense. Yeah, no. So I'd rather rip the bandaid off than be like, I'm juggling these four people that don't know they exist. It's like fuck all that. Right, that's a keepy-confused thing. I'd rather be, if they were like, are'm juggling these four people. They don't know they exist. It's like fuck all that. Like I just, if they were like, are you sleeping with anyone else? And I was, I'd be like, yes, because I don't want to have, and then what happens when you sit there?

And then like Instagram, they're, you know, on the hang out. That's the thing with social media, everyone knows. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like,

it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like the way the time to stress out about that rather just just be up and do you find so and are have you ever had a woman When you're like yeah, I actually am sleeping with other people. They're like well. I'm looking for something more serious And then they're out. No, well you're saying though. I think if there is some truth to this is that women I think do appreciate the honesty and then a lot of people and right away I think that when you start dating somebody you should always assume that they're dating other people Yeah, and there's no even if you had sex the first. It's 2017 and we're like in our late 20s, early 30s. Exactly.

It's like you're probably fucking a couple people. Right, just assume they are for men and for women. Especially if you made them on an app. For you to be so naive, I think that you're the only one that's right on, you know? Like get over it, you know, or. Well, no, but I think it's great to be honest. So, you know, Gavin, what do you think?

How does that feel to you? Do you think that maybe now you might wanna? You wanna come to the side? I know what you're gonna feel. I know what you're gonna feel. No judgment here, because I think that Gavin is more of the norm, to be honest. Because people don't have the language around it.

They're like, if I tell someone that I don't want this stereotypical monogamous relationship and have a bunch of casual sex, that it's not gonna be accepted. And I don't even know how to talk about it. Yeah. So don't ask, don't tell. But by who gonna be accepted. And I don't know how to talk about it. So don't ask, don't tell. But by who, I don't like, I don't like,

I don't like, she doesn't like. Okay, hard work. We're not all like you. Going back to this whole thing of communication, I think that's definitely something that I can improve on because I'm pretty easy to please. I'm really easy going and it doesn't take much to make me happy, you know, in terms of-

Actually, you're just, if they like you a lot, but no. Do you assume that they're all sleeping with other people these women, like, what do you think is their deal? Definitely. To think that I'd be the only one in their lives that would just be naive. It's not like I'm seeing them all very frequently. It's definitely spaced out in time.

A lot of friends that I have and a lot of people that I hang out with, they're from different places, or, you know, they're traveling around a lot. It's not something that I have like this system where there's a calendar like, okay, this is my rotation, this is how I have it mapped out and planned out, not some kind of evil genius in that. But you said you're not a great communicator though, would you mean by that? As far as this or what about? Well, just in terms of how of my feelings,

of how I really feel about you in terms of like is this something that I want to pursue long-term? Is this something that I, you know, do I love you? I'm not a good communicator in that sense. Do you know how you feel about the words it kind of like just, sometimes it can be hard feelings also in other skills sometimes. I think so, yeah. I think so. I think I am really good at blocking emotions and, you know, staying in myself. Just with a lot of, I think a lot of that has to do

with just my past and my upbringing and what I've gone through from a really young age. But I think ultimately when it comes to happiness, it's a choice that we choose to be happy by and large. Unless you have mental illness or other problems like that, I think that a lot of times it's really easy to kind to get stuck in a place where you're not necessarily feeling fulfilled or feeling satisfied with.

Are you fulfilled and satisfied? I am. I'm very happy. I think a big reason is that I don't rely on others for my own happiness. I think that I very much, myself believe that happiness is a choice and I choose that way. But I think that you also, I don't know, I want to give you a hug right now. I mean, yeah, I do. I just want to like, yeah, aww. Because I want you to feel stuff. I think it'll be good for you to like open up and, you know, have a look at it. That's definitely something I can improve on. I know, again, I don't think that it's not, it's something that I'm bad at.

No, you're not bad at the point of the day. I'm just saying, I'm telling you guys, we all have adaptive mechanisms that get us through life. Okay, you guys, listen, I wonder about the best sex you've ever had, the best sexual experience and why. Oh, man. Why was it the best?

Why is it in your spank bank? Why is it the top of the list? Like, what happened and what made it the best? There's so many different kinds, you know? There's like the crazy and the weird place sex. There's like, the porno sex. There's like the, I'm deeply in love with you sex. You know, there's like, oh, they're so kind.

So many textures, I got it. I know. Okay, so one, you can think, we can come back. You can come back, if you want. Anyone else? What, what's the first thing that came to your mind? Like, what was like, oh wait, I can't say that, say that one.

No, yeah. Or do, don't, if it doesn't resonate to the best. I remember, I was 20. Wow, okay. Yeah, that was a lot, no, I was younger than that. I was 19 and she was a lot older than me. She was like 27, which now sounds young as hell. Right, older women, awesome.

I met her at this weird bike ride thing and then she was just like, hey, come back to my place and then it was good. I don't know what. But here's the thing, you know what's interesting to the bed, it wasn't necessarily then she was just like, hey, come back to my place and then it was good. I don't know what- But here's the thing, you know what's interesting to the bed, it wasn't necessarily, I'm just gonna assume here that it wasn't necessarily the actual sex that happened.

It was more like, oh my God, this older woman. Yeah, it was kind of the fact that that was new. There was, I was living in LA for a year. I didn't really know the city. She might have took me back to the strange house with like a beautiful view of downtown. I was like, one of them again myself into, and it was, I don't know know the city. She took me back to the strange house with like a beautiful view of downtown. I was like one of them again myself into and it was, I don't know, it was just the... It was like the different, the strange.

Yeah, and it was like the middle. Did you ever see her again? Yeah, yeah, a couple of times. And, you know, I still know her and stuff like that. So, I don't know. Body's working together. Body's working together. That's...

That's when it's the best. Can't force that. Like, they're in music with... Yeah, it is. It's like a dance. Gentle is the best can't force that like they music. Yeah, it is it is it's like a dance. Yeah I'm not You my best sex was good sex It's different for I mean it but I like your question to the clarifier was like yeah, it can be connected sex Can be deep love it can be you know the crazy sex on the you know yeah, I'm down the chair left I did that's actually a chair left once we're in the crazy sex on the chairlift.

It's actually a chairlift once. We're in the craziest sex we had earlier, but anyway. My, mine was with a girl that I had met during study abroad. So she, she wasn't American and we, we kind of went to the same college and a lot of the students were going out partying all the time and then one night,

we just kind of ended up making out. Both of us completely obliterated, wasted not even too much of a memory going on. And then people brought it up to us and then we just kept hanging out and partying, finding each other at the end of the party and then eventually it turned into- Well, it was great to help. Well, yeah, to be honest with you, Finding each other at the end of the party and then eventually it turned into Why was it great?

Well, yeah, it to be honest with you it just I Oh my god, I don't even know it was for it because you were in different country Yeah, it was it was my first experience with someone who was an American, you know It's very it was very foreign yeah, and Like the first night that we hooked up we were were both pretty, pretty drunk and then woke up. And for me, morning sex, that's like where it's at. I really dig it, yeah.

So that morning, we both were like, you know, kind of fishing around like, where are we two, you know, oh, stuff happened last night, right? Yeah, and then she was like, you wanna go again? And I'm like, yes. And then that's all we did all day long, like all day long. And just, yeah. It was, it was. I love that. And just, yeah. It was awesome.

For both of you, it was like an unknown, like, foreigner, typical, and some you didn't know. Okay, Gavin. It was, I remember this was back in college, probably when I was 21 or 22. I had to go to school earlier. I played Water Polo and we had our preseason training camp. And the girl I was dating at the time,

she hadn't started school yet. She was still at home and her parents were out of town And then we I finished my preseason training camp So I was in the best shape of my life and then I get back to her parents house where she was staying and it was just an all-day Adventure where we fucked in probably every single room of the house from the kitchen cabinet to her parents walk in shower Outside and it was just exciting because her parents were at home, so it was kind of like that secretive aspect to it. But then just the adventure of kind of going

to all the different rooms in the house is different positions. It was kind of like a, just a marathon where I felt like, almost like a porn o movie, you know, and something that you would see in that sense. And I was just really, so you guys were really interesting. This is very soon, do you see this like in that sense, you know, that just was really interesting. This is very soon, would you see this? I actually remembered mine.

It was on top of a fire tower. Oh, die of changing that, sir. Yeah, like a year ago with my girlfriend at a time. Uh huh. So on top, like these fire towers they have up in the California mountains. Right. We like got onto this list through my ants' friendship.

But there's like this big balcony, and you're like, you know, on top of a mountain, and then on top of a fire tower So it's like 360 degrees just like make it yeah, right? So you guys all had like adventures that went on and on and on I think it's just interesting like the element of surprise and something different something new because sex and get kind of boring Have you guys been in like long term? He said you've been in a long term. Yeah, okay? Okay, I have a question. What's on your sexual bucket list? Anything that you're like I really want to Have a threesome. Have you got a threesome? I have not had a threesome. Do you want one? Yes, I do

Okay, I've had a handful of them Chad I know I wasn't the highlight the sweet no It really wasn't okay. I tell you something about it. Yeah, they can't be like you have to like yeah Okay, that tells you something about it. Now they can't be, like you have to like, yeah, it's a thing. Yeah, the sweet innocent Southern boy over here said, I took all the three sums. So surprised. But yeah, I've had,

It keeps shocking me too. Right, yeah, I'm an interesting guy. This is always, it's a very common question, well dating and everything else. Did you have the three-some question or the, oh, the Buckleys question. And I have the most boring answer for it is that I've probably lived out every fantasy I've wanted to.

Come on, everyone. I know, yeah, that's weird. No, well, what was, okay. Of course, growing up, the threesome is supposed to be the holy grail of fantasies. So I had one in high school, and then had another one as a young adult, and then another one as a young adult,

and another one later on, late 20s, and I've had them both. I've had three sons where there were me and another guy involved in a female, but me and the guy, nothing happened with us, just not my bag, but yeah, so I've had them every which way and I've done a handful of them. So nothing on the bucket list, nothing.

I know that's a horrible answer, but I don't get me wrong to have another three some cool you know but in terms of like a fantasy that I'm actively seeking out or anything like that I just don't have it. I'm hoping in love. Oh God, that's the biggest fantasy of them all. I don't know, really. You know I'm 33, I'm single, most of my long-term relationships don't last more than two

years. I come from an area where people were married at 18 divorced. Right, so I'm in so many again. Most of my friends areterm relationships don't last more than two years. I come from an area where people were married at 18 divorced. So I'm married again. Most of my friends are going through their second divorce. So yeah, falling in love, I think that'd be awesome. Yeah, that'd be fun. I hear you. Cartway.

I have a threesome in love here. Better. I'm kind of, you've done it all. No, no, I like to fuck a married couple. Oh. Yeah, both of them. I'd like to be the other guy. What is it about that?

Because there's an element of being the novelty that I think would be totally hot. Like just being the piece of meat that they kind of bring. And I would be into that. And I am done. Yeah, yeah. I think they call it a bit, right? Malian, I have a question.

What do you wish you could tell your younger self about sex? What do you know now? God, I wish I knew that. Oh, man. That's a great question. To not be so worried about the outcome of, or about being awkward, about things afterwards, just to go for it and in my older age,

as you become more mature, you realize that it's, you know, sex is more of just than a natural part of life. And it's not a big deal. It's not something where you need that it's, you know, sex is more of just a natural part of life. And it's not a big deal. It's not something where you need to worry about, you know, oh, is it gonna be weird afterwards? Oh, that's tough. I think that's something that you learn

as you, you know, get more experienced. Sure. I just don't think so much. Don't think during sex or just in general. Yeah, in general, in life. I would probably say, like, relationship and sex wise, to my younger self going through relationships later on in life, the best advice I would give is something you said earlier

is about communication. Like, you know, don't be afraid to communicate earlier. You know, the girl with a tongue ring, if I would have told her the first time, and that would have saved like five different times with that tongue ring, it would have been, I would have been way happier, you know. But that's the thing, you know, you shouldn't be afraid to get advice and to be able to

give advice. But it's tricky with men sometimes, I think. Anoman to give you back, right? Yeah, for me, it's, it's, it's not, I don't get my feelings heard about it, but you're probably right. You have to do it like, yeah, listen to a total man like, do something like, I could never, I'm really bad at performing all sex because one woman said that, you know, he sucked it out of everyone. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, it's like, maybe you were bad for her, performing oral sex because one woman said that, you know, he sucked it out of her.

Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, it's like maybe you were bad for her, but for someone else, you might be a genius. I said, my first long-term relationship, that's what we had, the oral sex talk, she was like, yeah, I don't really like how you do it. And she was like, but this is how I want you to do it. And I was like, I'm down,

because I'm doing it for her, I'm not doing it for me. You know, I want it. So this is not that I don't like to do it, but I like to get pleasure. But do you really like to do it? Yeah, yeah, I like to do it. I was like, I'm down because I'm doing it for her. I'm not doing it for me. You know, I want it. So this is not that I don't like to do it, but I like to do it. But do you really like to do it? Yeah, yeah, I like to do it. Yeah, I really do. But I mean, the main part about it is giving pleasure to my significant others. So if I'm doing it wrong, then neither of us would enjoy it. You know, what are we doing? Right. Yeah. But is there anything about your sexual skills or any kind of have little insecurities about anything that has happened that you're like that kind of stuck with me? Anything that you're like, I'm not sure how I'm great at, I don't know.

Yeah, sure. Using sex toys, if you ever used them are tied a girl up or a woman. I mean, I could work on my knots. I'm a guy. We can help you. You've come to the right place. I think I know the basics, but I can't do it. What's that called?

You want a blackout? You want a boy scout or the type of boy scout? Yeah, I don't I can't do it. What's that common voice thing where they tie people to? Yeah, I don't know how to do that. You want a voice count? You don't do the nuts? You're going to join the voice count, and you can still help you. That's really why people don't have the voice count. I constantly have a fear that I'm not, even though the relationship I just spoke about, I mean, she and I were 18, 19 years old.

That was my first long relationship, but I still, I don't get enough feedback on oral sex to know if I've grown about it. If I've grown about it. More feedback on the compliments, right? Yeah, if I've grown about it as in my adult life. Well, let's turn this to you as what is anything that's confusing to you about women? Any questions you have?

I'm here, you can ask me. This is what I do. How can I help you? Like, I didn't even keep you like, why is it? Is that the clitoris? Why did that girl freak out because I stayed the night? Did you seem surprised when I said that? No, I think there's women like that. Women, though. I just thought it was like, either she's the best sleeper. She's somewhere weird. But what about sex seriously? Is there anything you're like

every time or even it was your most recent experience? Like, I didn't know if I should put a finger in her ass, for example. I don't know. Some people are so different at we're all I'm so useless everyone's different, you know, it's like no We're all different. Yes, please jam your thumb into my butt and other people are like old screaming out the door If you exactly it's like why don't you figure out if they like that before you do it. That's good Yeah, or read their body, you know like Yeah, no, it's true. That's butt stuff, though. No, it's everything. You should always, I mean, I think that that's one of the big things about sex is that it's really important to pay attention.

I think for guys, and my heart grows out to men because I feel like you guys are put in this position that you have to be in charge and control, initiate, you're just know exactly what you're doing, how to like play your body like an instrument. When, every woman is different, every single woman's body is different. Like, if you put 100 women in a room and they were all masturbating, they would all be doing something differently. How do you guys learn about sex?

How am I masturbating? Well, but it also like masturbating. I had some awesome first girlfriend. I had a very awesome, very confident, very in tune with herself girlfriend, who literally just... What you, okay, tell me one thing she taught you. Yeah, I would go down her.

What you did to you. She was like, no. She was like, don't attack my clip right off the right I'm like cool I won't you know around the clip around oh you know take you know and like this idea that there's you know this Gavin chat this is good advice when you're like 17 you're like you're like you know about it I'm putting my dick in you you know it's like and she's like no there's all this other stuff I'm glad you know because guys do that like'm putting my dick in you, you know, it's like, and she's like, no, there's all this other stuff. I'm glad you know that, because guys do that at like, you're 27, 37.

They got to figure that out and be kind. Some men never do. Well, that's, you're asking, just in, not the big question, like how did we find out what sex was, you're asking about how do we learn? I don't know, yeah, how'd you learn about sex?

I think of it, yeah, the other way, yeah. I lost my virginity really young, like 14, 14. And the girl that I was dating at the time was between 17 and 18. So she'd like turned 18 while we were dating. So plenty, plenty of lessons went in with that. Yeah. Okay.

So she tied you stuff. Would you remember one thing that you're like every time you're having sex, now another you think of her but you're like, oh, think I know how to like, on hook a bra with whatever or that was one of them. Oh, it was all of this. I mean, you know, I was a freshman in high school. I was a living the dream at that point. This is all my friends were like a senior man. Good job. You know, okay.

When I first heard your question, I was thinking like, oh, God, like when did I learn sex at? Like, this is what I thought she did. This is going gonna be embarrassing. Well, no, it's funny because my mom was the school nurse at the school that I went to. And so I learned sex ed from her when I was in fifth grade. Yeah, you can't just be like my mom. You know, if you give us some context there.

Great, masturbation. How often do you guys masturbate? Very frequent. All the time. Yeah. Just now when you got here, went to bed. I did this morning. Twice this morning. Twice this morning, okay. All time. Yeah. Like just now when you got here, I went to the morning. Twice this morning. Twice this morning. Okay. Last night. Yeah. Do you watch porn? Yes. Yeah. Well, kind. How do you decide? Like in the moment?

Yeah. Yeah. I have a naked lady fetish. So I'm really. Which must work for you. That's one of those weird ones. Yeah. Real confusing. That started in Japan. Yeah. So it was really strange. It's an old Canadian thing. Do you ever think I'd rather just watch porn than have sex? Not necessarily, but I definitely see the appeal of not having to work to find someone to have sex with unless you got his four person list going on.

But yeah, I definitely like, you're, that Gavin struggles in his own way. No, no, he's doing great. He's doing great. But yeah, I definitely see the, like, man, I just worked 14 hours. Do I want to go out to a bar and try to hook up with someone or do I just want to go home and watch, watch porn?

Do you think it's impacted the way that you have sex? Yes. How so? Several different reasons. That by itself, like if this were the 70s, would I be going home to look at a magazine or would I actively try to go meet someone more often? And I definitely think I would be doing that. Wait, because there's point, what do you say? But in the 70s, you're saying you'd go home and you have to, the magazine wouldn't be as satisfying, so now that you're porn, you can just go home, is it more satisfying? I would imagine so. I would imagine porn makes things easier, so it makes, it probably makes me less motivated.

I would just say, so you could think, I'm just going to go home, I can just check off like 10 times. I don't even need to write interesting, so it's kind of a deterrent. Right, and then the other part of it would be the sensitivity part of it. Like, you, a guy masturbating is going to be different sensitivity than having sex with someone. It's a different kind of orgasm. Oh yeah, it's changed, perhaps for you, over time, do you think the more...

Oh, I'm sure it has. Like, I've had conversations with women that I've dated before that I go too long about things, but when I masturbate, I can get myself off in 10 minutes. Oh, so you're saying that you go to turn sex, like, why are you taking so long to? Right, yeah, yeah. It's because the sensitivity is different. Like, the section of my penis that I'm used to pleasureing myself on is different than

what sex would feel like. So it's not that it's better. I get it, no. I'd much rather have sex than masturbate, but yeah. What do you guys, anything else, porn? It's a different urge for me, you know, it's like sometimes I'm like, no. Much rather have sex than masturbate, but yeah. What do you guys, anything else, porn? It's a different urge for me. It's like sometimes I'm like, yeah, I just want to be naked by myself

and beat off a whole bunch. And then sometimes I'm like, no, I really want to touch another body. So they're kind of different for me. It's not as simple as like, I'm horny. Which am I going to do? It's more like, I would like to have sex or I don't. Okay.

I guess. I think porn and masturbation for me is just a good way to wind down and relax. Just with my job in an office from set hours. So just to be able to come home, wind down, she'll have just a convenient way for me to get that release. I got it.

Okay, but it doesn't like impact. What you're thinking about are fantasizing during that release. I got it. Okay. But it doesn't like impact. What you're thinking about are fantasizing during sex. Doesn't sound like it. No. Okay. You guys, I've got questions for you guys. I got, we're going to ask you all five questions.

We're going to go around and ask you a rapid fire questions. Okay. Chad. Yes. Biggest turn on. Where a woman would like me to ejaculate. When she tells you where? Yes. Or where would you likeaculate. When she tells you where? Yes.

Or where would you like her to? When she tells me where. Got it. Okay, heartwork. That's a good answer. Are we talking? Biggest turn. I like to essentially.

I want to win a woman gets off. That's what I mean. Yeah, that. Right, no. I want to take tells me to come on our dates. I'm accumulations up. Okay, I love it. Okay. Harik, biggest turn off. Someone who's all stuck up about things.

We're supposed to do it like this. I'm like, rigid. Waste my time. That's a good question. Biggest turn off for me, I think, is just being too needy if you're asking me to do too much or if it's you know that makes sense for you. You're an island got it okay okay, Chewwick. Chewwick. I'm Chad.

Chad. No, I'm Chad. I used to be one of my nicknames. That's cute though, but Chewwick you guys are kind of I think he and I are gonna be- That's kind of a voice but it means names it's amazing. Yeah, yeah. My biggest turn off the shitty personality. That'll, yeah, that's- Just completely get me out of a situation. Like, I'm in exactly like someone who doesn't, you know,

oh, well, I don't tip servers or something like that. That's when you'd rather watch porn. Yeah, I'm like, yeah. That's where you're like, yeah. Someone's just mean to people, someone that's just, just- Right, I got it. Celebrate the rignorance or something like that.

Right. I just can't get on board with that. Okay, Gavin, sex is part of a woman's body. 2017, the year of the ass. Yeah, just this year. Okay, Chad. I'm a big fan of really nice hair. All right. Yeah.

I sold off butts, but I have a thing to like upper backs. Like well, my sold up, I think that's super hot. Yeah, like it. Okay, partwick, what's the one thing you wish you could tell your future partners about your needs? The second she shows up. Oh, here, if you've never seen an uncircumcized penis before, get ready.

Ha, perfect. It's not that complicated. It's not, right? That's our whole mother's show, but right? It's really not. I'll show you in like, right. Yeah, done and done.

The one extra part. Got it. Yeah, and like that's it, like, right. Wow, get over it. Okay, what's the one thing? Yeah, your body. What would you help them to know when they get there? I'm gonna need to be groomed periodically

because I'm pretty hairy. So you want, you want her to groom, trim your, you're just saying like, she doesn't need to groom me, but I am gonna need to be groomed. Okay. Chad. Oral sex can get me in the mood for just about anything,

anytime, anywhere. Blood drops. Like if a girl just says, hey, you know, this is what I'm, you know, I'm gonna go down in here right now. That we, I feel like a lot of women come equipped knowing that with no teeth or you're so good. You would think, but yeah.

Yeah. Cool. Okay, but yeah. Yeah. Cool. Okay, craziest place you guys can just jump in. It's the last one. Craziest place you've had sex. That's a fire tower for me. Yeah, you already talked about it. That was cool.

Those guys shooting guns in the distance. Awesome. It's hot. Not really. It's scary. But maybe in a good way. Yeah, not at me. In a party bus in college, around a party bus in college around a lot of people,

around a lot of people on a sorority date night. Right, of course, sorority party in a boss. It was on a second date with a girl. There was a lake, like a public lake area that a lot of people went to and would hike around. And it was right on the dock of that lake. I know, right like our sex. Yeah, outdoor right in the middle They're had I mean we were both drunk, but people had you seen like that's kind of hot right like if fan like people watching

I'm totally in there. Yeah, you guys should go to sex parties have you been I know that's a whole thing Yeah, I've been on the list for like five years. I'm waiting for the email And you're like that's a planning it takes the like you know that email. And you're like, oh, that's a planning, it takes the like, you know, it takes the plan. You're not like, yeah. Okay, you guys are awesome. Do you have any questions for me at all? Anything come up? What's the elusive male g spot,

and how do you find it? The prostate. Oh, I was gonna ask you guys if you were interested in, you know, play that was one of my questions. How do you find it? Very carefully. It's great to start like when you're on your own, the partner when you're masturbating. It's similar to how you find the G spot. Have

you found the G spot yet? It's awesome. But yeah, you go slow, use a finger and or a Tory like that but plug but not the one here on the table. Use lots of glue. Breathing is really important because oftentimes like if you're're having anal sex if you guys have anal sex before with women. I've done it to myself. It made me come so hard I started dying laughing. Also because of the image of like me with a finger of my ass like kneeling on my floor just like gazing in. You're fellow man. Yeah, I was like dying. I was like what the fuck is going on right now. It was it was truly hilarious. Right.

And how did you, did you warm up? Did you lose Lou? Yeah, yeah, of course. You got to go slow, because it's a jam. Yeah, you can't. Like, it's a tricky area, but not like not to scare you, but just make sure that you're warmed up. Turned on, use Lou is awesome.

I'm going to give you guys, we're going to get some Lou when you go home. Lou, it's awesome. I could give you some toys that would happen. But really, you just want to like, you could just take your finger and go around the outside and see what feels, a lot of nerve endings there and then like, so I put a finger inside. And it's kind of like that come hither motion, the same way that you're looking for a G-spot,

like with your finger towards the belly, it's the same place on the man. And I mean, you've got tons of stuff on your website if you want to find out about it. Can I have one more question? Because I'm assuming you guys are all straight because that's what we talked about before the show, but have you had experiences with men or have ever had any fantasy best? I have, yeah. You have, okay? When I was younger and it was totally cool.

Right? What'd you do? Did you? It was relatively tame by like my standards now. I just like made up with the whole power. It was all like, it was outside of an balcony with this guy who's like straight up the most beautiful man I've ever seen in my life. DeAngelo if you're out there, call me.

And that's his name. He's a really good singer. Of course. He's in the music. No, no, not that guy. Oh, I thought that was the joke. No, that would be amazing. So what? Different DeAngelo.

Did you like have the blowjob? No, no, it was like all pretty much over the pants and stuff. But like I was 18 or something. So I was like, well, this is new. But like now if that was to happen, it probably would have gotten much farther. Because it, it wouldn't have. It wouldn't have far that it wouldn't have.

Yeah, because you'll be interested in being, yeah, I'd be fine with it. My whole thing is again, it's like, if the bodies work together. Right, it's about energy, it's about, right? That said, I am straight because I wouldn't want to be in a romantic relationship with a man. But physically, I can be a trap, as far as I can tell.

Right, all right. I know, who knows? Open mind. Yeah. No. I've had three Sims where a guy was involved as well. I'm 100% straight. Some of my closest friends are gay.

They call me terminally straight is what they would call me. Because they're very convinced that a lot of straight guys will have experiences, but they're like, Chad just doesn't. I've never had an experience with a guy other than like a friendly kiss,

as almost as a joke, you know. Okay, that's mean. Well sure, yeah, and it's fine. The threesome did lead into the guy really thought that that's what was happening. So while the girl was going down on me, I turned and he was, you know, I was like, what are you doing? I just wanted to give you a kiss while you're getting a blowjob.

And I was like, no, you know, I felt bad, but I was like, I'm sorry. Because you're like a Southern gentleman. Right. I'm really sorry. I open the door for him later on. That's awesome. That's great. But yeah. Gavin, you were asking about prostate play. And I think a lot of men, I love the US form later on and everything. That's awesome. That's great. But yeah.

Gavin, you were asking about prostate play, and I think a lot of men, I love the US set, because there are a lot of men, let's my show, that I think are they believe in that. Not the men who listen to my show, because they know, but there are men out there who think like, oh, it would make me gay or, you know, why would I ever venture in that area. However, like, a heart work can tell you just the best work. It's your own body. It's like, what makes a gay about touching your own butthole. It's like get over it.

Exactly. OK, I'm that note. Thank you, everyone. You guys were awesome. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you. This was a blast. This was fun. Really enjoyed having you part of this amazing round table.

And thank you to everyone who are listening to the show. Thanks for emailing all your questions and for being in touch. Thank you. Our amazing team, Ken, Jamie, are in turn Shannon, producer, Lark, and Michael. And thanks everyone for listening. Was it good for you? Email at feedback at sexwithamla.com.