Sexe Oral - Avoir un enfant seule avec Geneviève

Episode Date: January 30, 2025

Les propos exprimés dans ce podcast relèvent d’expériences et d’opinions personnelles dans un but de divertissement et ne substituent pas les conseils d’un.e sexologue ou autre professionnel de la santé.Cette semaine sur le podcast, on reçoit Geneviève qui est venue nous parler de sa décision d'avoir un enfant seule. Le podcast est présenté par Éros et Compagnie Utiliser le code promo : SexeOral pour 15% de rabais https://www.erosetcompagnie.com/ Les jouets dont les filles parlent: https://www.erosetcompagnie.com/page/podcast  Pour collaborations: [e-mail] Pour toutes questions: [e-mail] Pour suivre les filles sur Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/sexeoralpodcast Pour contacter les filles directement, écrivez-nous sur Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sexeoral.podcast/

Hello, here's Joanie, live from my living room, to announce an incredible promotion at Hérois et Compagnie. So, a demo for the end of the week, if you didn't have anything, the end of the week, Superball or Saint-Valentin. So, we give you two incredible gifts. So, if you book a demo for the end of the week of Superball, we give you the football ball for free, which I will explain to Lisanne later. So it's the end of the week from the 7th to the 9th of February. We give it to you in addition to all your other gifts. And also if you want a bouquet from the 14th to the 16th of February for Saint Valentine's Day, we give it to you for free in addition to your other gifts. The new heart, Cutie, Cutie, Cutie, Satisfier, Suction, it's an incredible toy, it goes in the bath, it's super powerful, the hole is big, so all our keys go in,

so we give it to you for free, with the demo, in addition to all that. So, have fun, have fun, have fun Super Bowl, have a good Valentine's Day, and I'll show you in a play football in Lysande-Soupo. Today, we have Geneviève, who will be talking about her solo parenting. I heard her say, from the beginning to the end, how she decided to get involved in this process, how it happened, her pregnancy, how it's going with her daughter who is two years old today, to start dating again, families are re-composed, we address many topics around that and it was really really interesting, I hope you will appreciate it.

We love it, love it. Really. Listen, it looks like it's going to take away the... I'm always afraid to separate, but now it looks like it took us away too. I'm always afraid to separate, but now it looks like we're... We might be better off together. Finally! Louis, bye! We're capable, we're really capable. Ciao! Bye!

Good night! Welcome, Geneviève. Thank you. To Sex Orale. Thank you for being here. It's really cool. Thank you for having me. I'm happy to be here. I was saying earlier, we were taking a shower together, and I said it's fun because it's been a long time since we talked about babies. Yeah. And you know, since we're being careful, we're getting along, we're on a sex orale podcast, and we talked about it a lot.

And I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to be here. And I said it's fun because it's been a long time since we talked about babies. Because we're being careful, we're listening, we have a sexual podcast, and we talked about it a lot. So today we're talking about babies!

If you don't like it, don't listen to it. And Geneviève, I know her, we did a live during the pandemic. And we met there, and we really liked each other, we really got along. We talked on the phone afterwards, and we were like, we have to do something! And we never did anything. No, but like that, it was the same. What are we doing today? Yes! Look, that's it. And we met there.

And today, we wanted to talk about single parenting with you. But before that, I asked you the question earlier, I thought it was monoparentality. You told me, no, it's not the same thing. It's not the same thing. Yes, there is a little thought it was monoparentality, and you said to me, no, it's not the same thing. Do you want to? It's not the same thing. Yes, there is a little distinction because monoparentality, in fact, what is your goal, what is your project?

A single parent is really a project for you alone. It's someone who decides, I'm going to have a child alone. Monoparentality, it will be, for example, the mother gets married alone because the guy left, either during pregnancy, or when the child was young, or just any time. Or it could be an accident too, with a one-night stand, and the person doesn't want to take responsibility. But it wasn't like a project at the base of, I want to be a single mom, let's say.

Oh, yeah. Okay, so let's say, even if she never had a dad, she's not considered a single mom, she's considered as a single. Because it wasn't his first... Yes, but in fact, she will live the same thing as a single, in the sense that she won't have any help, she won't have anything, except that she will still have all the time the kind of dame-à-classe depit that the guy could come back, he could decide to have guard rights, etc. Versus, for example, I had a spasm,

a fertility clinic, and you know, it's my baby, and no one else has rights to it. No one is on the birth certificate. That's crazy because you say, the biggest assinants, let's say, my husband and me, we're focusing on education. It's always like that. It's like how you see your child as an adult versus the other? You're always alone making decisions, that's crazy.

Do you want to start with why you wanted to have a child alone? Did it come from afar? Yes, since I was really little, I knew I was going to be a mom. It's a certainty. I couldn't have a life without children. When I was young, I drew families, like parents with children. I don't know why, but I drew families all the time. I'm really a family girl too. I've always been like that, even in my family,

family meetings, I'm always there. I have cousins who don't come sometimes, and I'm like, oh, for them, family is not important. I'm really family, family. And at one point, it didn't go so well, my love stories and dating stories. And around mid-20th, I told my mom in a semi-joke, I was like, if I don't find anyone in 30, I'll get killed. My mom replied, don't worry about that, you'll find a guy in a bar with a good genetics.

But she was like, my mom is zero. But we were joking, but I had a real feeling. I'm sure I won't end my life saying, I didn't have children, I regret it. I'm not someone who cares about children, but I'm unable to have regrets in life. I'm allergic to that. I'd rather do what? What's the difference between regret and death? I liked to do what. And, well, what's the difference between regret and not doing it?

I liked to do what and regret it than not doing it and having regrets all my life, not doing it. So I felt a little bit like that. I was 30 years old, I was going to a few places, I was like, OK, I'm going to leave a chance. Finally, it ended with the person. It was like the pandemic,

but I said to myself, OK, I'm really going to give a dating boost because I go to date full-time, but I was like, OK, this is my last chance. I went to the apps, I dated actively, I hated it, I was disappointed. And then I said, OK, this is where it happens. And then I got on the waiting list for the St. Justine's Procrastine Clinic. And at the beginning, I said, there's waiting and everything. I was like, well, I'm not in a hurry. The process is starting to take shape in my head. And finally, it really wasn't long.

I called in February 2021. And in May, I had my phone call with the doctor and he was prescribing me the usual fertility tests. And he said to me, I was 31 years old at the time, 31 years old, the tests will be beautiful and all that. But finally, the tests weren't that, and I thought that the tests would be nice and all that, but in the end, the tests weren't that nice. I had a little reserve of variance. When the doctor called me to give me the results, he told me,

we have to inseminate you in the next year or you'll freeze your ovals. So I was like, there are a lot of women who are waiting at 40 years old, because they say, you're still young, you're still young. There are people who make me that comment, well, you're still young, you have time to find it. And I was like, yeah, but I've been ready since before yesterday. So if I find someone, fight a relationship, like if I'm just a mother, go 35, if I find that far. And for me, I also realized when dating,

that it was more important for me to have children than a partner. You know, it looks like I was just looking for a genitor when I was dating. I was like, would you be my dad? Would we have the same education levels? Would I be able to leave my children alone if we ever split up? So at one point I was like, okay, but I'm looking for a genitor, and that's in sperm banks. It's crazy, but there are a lot of them.

I think that all of them, me too, when I was in Louis, I was like, my God, he would be my father. I think there's always a kind of little... It's important to say that to your children. Yes, it's important. But I didn't ask myself, zero, would you be a good partner? It was just that I was wondering. And do you want children?

It's the first question. If you say no, I won't waste my time. When did you get your call? Four months later? Two months later. Were you mentally ready? I knew I was going to do tests and that I could start when I wanted to.

But I had the idea of starting at the end of 2021 or the beginning of 2022. One of my good friends wanted to try when I wanted to, but I had the idea to start at the end of 2021 or the beginning of 2022. One of my good friends wanted to try for her second time at that time. I was like, we're going to be pregnant at the same time, we're going to have our maternity leave at the same time, but at the same time, you never control those things. Besides, she was pregnant way before, so it stressed me out. It put me under pressure. And then, well, in the end, we still had a part of our vacation together, it was fun. But yeah, that's it, I was nervous when the doctor told me that. I was like, imagine if I had waited 40 years and then he said to me,

well, no, it's too late, madam, you're out of the city, you're on the opposite side, whatever. So I did it like, okay, go, I'll do it as quickly as possible. And then I signed up in November and it worked out. Wow. Okay. So you said you were almost out of it. Can we go see how we have ovules? How it works? I'm 30 years old. Well, yes, you have to do tests for your varicose reserve.

So basically, it's an ultrasound and a blood test. So the ultrasound, she told me when she saw the follicles, it's the pouch in which there are ovules, and she told me that out of one bar in a ovule, I had four, in the other, I had two, so I had six. And to be in groups of single mothers, I had already seen the numbers, and I was like, it doesn't seem like much. But then I waited to see the blood test. And then the blood test, when you go to my file on the Internet,

Carnet Santé Québec, I saw the result in red, red, it was written low, and it was written 0.24. I called my naturopath, I was like, at 31, 32, how old is the number? She said 2.5. I was like, so 0.24 is low? She was like, yes, it's extremely low. I had done a research in my group of solo moments where women often wait 40 years, as I said. And even 40-year-old women had AMH, what's it called, of like 0.90, 0.75, and they were flapping.

And I was like, oh, but I'm 0.24. So I was flapping really, I was sure I wasn't fertile. And finally, the doctor called me at my appointment, he was like, so when are we having a baby? I was like, huh? Can I? He's like, yeah, the doctor called me to my appointment. He was like, « So, when are we having a baby? » I was like, « Huh? I can? » He was like, « Yeah, but you have to hurry. » Oh, my God. Oh, yeah.

And then, when it starts to work, you have your appointment to get inspected. How does it work? Well, basically, you have a... Wait, did you choose first? Yes, I did. I checked the sperm banks on the Internet. It's like if you were storing store a house in the city center.

You store the criteria you want. But there's a sperm pool. So at the beginning, me and my friend, we check, we store all the criteria, the pluses. And then there's zero result coming out. We're like, OK, we're going to take a couple of pictures. What was important to me, I wanted to see adult photos. Because there are some that you just see baby pictures,

but there are people who, when their baby is cute and when they are adult, it's no longer the same thing. Then I wanted a guy who looked like me anyway so that my daughter looks like me. Well, my daughter is my guy, but it's a girl. Spoiler alert. But so that my child looks like me because I was his only parent, you know. Then I wanted an open-identity donor, so that means that at 18, my child can decide to contact the donor. Okay. And I wanted to... well, I was looking at genetic diseases and all that, you know, for example, there were some with breast cancer, ovaries in their family,

and it was transmitted from girl to girl. I was like, well, let's say if I have a daughter, I don't want that. So I was looking at things like that, but I really took out a lot of criteria. And that's it. I chose my donor, I ordered the sample, the books at the clinic. At the clinic, you're going to do an ultrasound to see the size of your follicles. I took medication to stimulate my ovaries. And then when I arrived at the ultrasound, the doctor, it was my doctor that I had talked to on the phone,

he said, well, for someone with a basal ovarian reserve, you are a good pounder. So I had beautiful follicles and everything. Well, the doctor was hungry. Yes, he was hungry. And then I came back a couple of days later for the insipidation, but they had scheduled my insipidation on Tuesday. And I, according to your check to the size of your follicles,

so they estimate that it grows by 10 millimeters per day, so it will ovulate on that day. But then, on Sunday, I felt my ovulation, because since I stopped the pill, and since it looked like I was fully connected with my body, because I had done a lot of things to boost my fertility, like I had taken supplements, I had changed a lot of things in my life habits

because we have so many things around us that play with hormones and fertility. I was in great connection with my body, and I felt my ovulation on Sunday. I went to Google and it was like, it has to happen in 24 hours, otherwise your ovule is ejected. So I was like, shit, my insinuation is bitten.

So on Monday morning, I had a panic attack. I was like, I felt my uvula yesterday, I need to be insimilated today. And they were like, ok, come on. Then they thawed the sperm, they insimilated it on Monday, and it worked. Oh, that's a tabarouite crime. How did you react when you knew you were pregnant? Oh, well, I was scared. I really wanted it to work. And just before I knew it, I went back to the sperm bank

and my donor had no more samples. And the only donors he had weren't that interesting. I was like, I should have bought more than one. I was like, I'm sure it won't work the first time. I was in depression. So when I saw that I was pregnant, I was pregnant, but at the same time, I didn't believe it, and I didn't want to believe it before.

I thought to myself, I can lose it for a second, I can lose it. I wasn't trying to be happy, but I was scared. How does sperm start? It's not necessarily in Montreal. No, no, no, it's American sperm banks. Ok, that's it. And they freeze it, and it's still good,

and they defrost it. And he freezes, and he's still good, and he freezes. Yes, that's it. OK. He looks like what? Is he a kind of brown guy? Well, he's brown, at the age of adult, but when he was younger, he was more pale, so my daughter was a little pale. OK. And he has eyes like hazelnuts with green inside, a little like mine. He has a beautiful smile, he's a nurse. OK. And, you know, that's it. He looked like had the right genetics, like his parents live old and everything. Did you write to him?

I can't. I don't have his contact number, it's like a donor number. And it's just that my daughter can contact the sperm bank and they will give me the coordinates. That's very nice, he always gives you sperm. You have to do it in love. There are some who find their donors on social media and write to them. I'm in groups like Donor Conceive Child and everything on Facebook. There was a girl who was like, I wrote to my donor and he blocked me. How should I take this? You shouldn't write to him, but you know.

He does that because it's his kind of charity, but it doesn't wait for... Well, he's paid for that too, right? Not so much. It's not so much paying. Oh no, okay. And here, I think it's... Yes, it's legal to pay for that. It's going to be a nice kind of your trip. It's not for nothing that we're in a hurry. What's weird is that they're going to give the sperm for free to help families,

but for example, we have to pay to have it. It doesn't make any sense to me why people would want to give sperm if their volunteer costs them 10,000$ each. How much does it cost you? It costs about 1000$ per donation, but it's now almost 2000$. It's between 1500$ and 2000$ per donation. I thought it was like 10,000. No, except that you're 10 to 15% lucky that it works at the first signing.

So usually you buy it every month. That's why I didn't buy it in advance either. I was like, you know, otherwise I would have kept it because I don't even have the right to sell it. Because you can't sell it on the spot. So I just took one. And how did you do your thesis? Who did you do it with or how? Basically, when you do an inspiration,

you often take ovuline, which is like a stinging you do in the stomach to trigger ovulation, and that leaves pregnancy hormones in your blood. So if you test too early, you're going to have a positive, but it can be just because of ovuline. So I saw girls in fertility who were testing the elimination of glass. So let's say they were testing too early, they saw a line, it was peeling, peeling, peeling, it was disappearing.

Plus, if they were pregnant, it was coming back. So that's kind of what I did. I had a little line of peeling, it was like 8 days, post-insulation, 9 days, 10 days. Then around the 10th or 11th day, there was almost nothing. And then the next day, it was darker. But I wasn't sure. I sent it to a single mom I was talking to and she was like, yes, yes, it's positive. So I put it

in my single mom's bag and I was like, is it positive? Everyone was like, yes, yes. So it's the kind of mime I had, but I was alone in my bathroom and I called my mom and I was like, it's positive. My mom had come to my insemination and she was like, I never thought I'd be there when you were going to conceive your child. Wow, that's really funny. How did your family accompany you in this process?

Well, my mother... My mother, at first, was very worried about it. My mother is very anxious, and she thought she should take care of my child in my place, but yet I'm like, I'm full of autonomy in life in the sense that I left home at 19 and I never asked my mother to do anything, and she was like, I'm going to be 70 now, I don't want to be the second parent of this child. I was like, no, no, don't worry. But she took a little time to digest the news because she was getting in my place and she

wouldn't have been able to do that, but my mom and I are really, really different. So it took a little while before she accepted it, but she wasn't angry, you know. She accepted it, but she was like, she was scared. Very sensitive. Yeah. And then when I got pregnant and everything, we said that she was really, well, even when she came to my instigation, we said that she was more into it, and then she came to my x-rays, and you know, she was really happy. Finally, it's a bit the blonde, she said, she then she came to my calligraphy classes, and she was really happy.

Finally, it's a bit of a blank page. She says she doesn't want to do that, but finally... Well, not so much, because it's true that she's going to be 69 this year, and my mom is going to Parking soon, and she learned it just before my instigation. So, we went to my calligraphy class, and I said, Mom, if I hadn't done that, maybe you would never have known my children. So, she really realized that it was a good thing that she was I went to my Okay. Because it seems like... If you say that, it's like, I don't want to, I don't want to, after all.

It's the most important thing. She insisted on having it at least once a week since her birth, to create a bond. And they're going to get it from the nursery once a week, and my father is going to get it once a week when I work to help me, and it's like maintaining a bond. How did your pregnancy go without a solo? For real, really well. But I hated being pregnant, but for no reason. I still had a nice pregnancy. I just hated it. First trimester, I really had a heart attack.

But I'm so impatient in life. I was like, why don't cis guys exist? It's a long story. I was so stressed. As long as I didn't have it in my arms, it looked like I was like, I don't believe it. It can happen to anything. You see thingsétais tellement stressée. Tant que je l'avais pas dans les bras, on dirait, j'étais comme, j'y crois pas, il peut arriver n'importe quoi, tu sais. Tu vois des affaires aussi sur les réseaux sociaux, là, je sais pas si ça va essayer qui falle bala l'outil, là, mais son compte, c'est sur le deuil périnatal parce que elle allait accoucher d'un bébé mort à genre neuf mois de grossesse, là. Pis moi, je regardais ça quand j'étais à neuf mois de grossesse comme une épaisse. Pis, pis tu sais, j'étais comme, sérieux, moi tant qu'il n'y avait pas dans mes bras, I was like, seriously, as long as I'm not in my arms, I'm not screaming victory, everything can happen. As soon as I didn't sing, move, during a period of time I was stressed.

So no, I didn't really like being pregnant. But it wasn't the fact of being single, for example. I was really well surrounded. I have one of my friends who came every week to see me and who helped me. My father came to do the maltheer so that I wouldn't... because when you're pregnant, you're not supposed to do the cat literature. And he would come and do the literature again. Because my father's love language is to make a living. So I'm like, I don't have time, so he comes and does it. And he's very happy. Very cute, you know.

Did you have any apprehensions about your parenting or your solo parenting? Yes, my biggest apprehensions were the fact that it was me who had to go, let's say, take my child to nursery and look for my child in nursery. Let's say my mother told me when I was young, it was me who was going to take your father to the nursery in the morning, or you were going to look for him in the evening, or the other way around. But that stressed me out because I thought, oh my God, my child is going to be in nursery for as long as the others, and I'm going parce que je me disais, mon Dieu, mon enfant va être à Garderie comme, il faut le plus longtemps que les autres, puis là, je vais être capable de concilier ça,

travailler de temps plein, puis faire ça en même temps. Ça fait que c'était vraiment ça, moi, qui me faisait le plus peur. On dirait que le reste, pas tant, parce que justement, comme on disait tantôt, je trouvais ça cool de pouvoir prendre toutes les décisions. Puis aussi, moi, j'ai souvent été avec des hommes qui étaient un peu des hommes enfants,

puis c'était moi qui fallait les maternes. Ça fait qu'on dirait que je me disais que si j'avais fait un enfant avec quelqu'un, je serais en crise parce qu'il fait rien. I had to deal with men who were kind of like children, and I had to deal with the midwives. So I was told that if I had had a child with someone, I would be sad because he would do nothing. So I would do everything alone, but I would be angry at someone. In addition. Yes. I knew I would do everything alone, but it would be my way, and I wouldn't have any expectations of anyone. So much.

Yes. But it was really the job, going to the grocery store, for real, a chance that the pandemic had happened, because most jobs are in the majority-time jobs, so my job. So it's for sure that it makes it easier. And I have a place in the CPE, like, around my street. So, you know, and then, as I was saying, my parents,

they're going to look for my daughter, like, once a week, each, to help me, either because I'm at the office, so I'm going to come back later, or because I decided to go to the gym, so my me, either because I'm at the office, so I'll come back later, or because I decided to go to the gym, so my dad comes and he does the math at the same time. That's really a lot of help. Yeah. The podcast today is presented by...

Ross & Company, like all our podcasts. And today I have a... Surprise! Surprise for you Alice. It's the season of... It's been a while since we've had a show. What season are we in right now? Winter. Yes, but the season... there's something winter right now.

It's something that guys play, guys often... Ah, hockey? Right now. It's something that guys play, guys often... Ah, hockey? Oh, that's not bad. Well, we have... No... Football. Football. Oh! Oh! You're reading it!

It's not the football season. Well, yes, it's the football season. I know, what are you reading? It's a football ball that's vibrating, in addition. Where is it? How do we do it? 1, 2, 3... All your penis is going to vibrate! Look at the football!

It's still comfortable for the hand. If you want to buy a gift for your boyfriend or a person with a penis, I'm not going with it. Do you like it? Does your boyfriend like football? No. He's not touching his ass. It's unpleasant. But he likes to hit me. Ah, well, one of the two. So if he likes to hit me or football,

these two are winners, he's vibrant, he's not expensive, on hirosecompagnie.com with the code SEXORAL for 15% discount. So, good touch down Liz. To get your promo, you just have to write the code SEXORAL when you book your demo on hocécompagnie.com.

Sexual code and we give you one of these two. It all depends on the date you book. Were there people who judged you for wanting to have a child alone? Were there people who found it selfish not to offer father or mother, others. People in my environment, zero. I already had a guy on Facebook that I knew for a long time, it was like a friend of one of my exes, we seemed that it had affected him in his pride and sorrow because he was a father. And then he was like, well, the children need a father. And then we had a kind of debate about it, because I was like, fine, you're a good father,

but to say that all children need a father, there are parents who beat their children, there are parents who rape their children, there are parents who leave, so their children have an abandonment wound. You know, there's nothing perfect in life. I chose my imperfection, but you know, there are studies... You know, we meet a psychologist in the fertility process, and the psychologist tells us that there are studies that show that children

from single-parent families, so really not single-parent, because single-parent, there is an abandonment somewhere, but single-parent, it's so many children who are desired, that they develop really well and they really don't have injuries of abandonment and lack. And you know, I still wanted to have male models in my surroundings, and that's the case. My father has the chum to my mother, she has the chum to my sister, who is her father, who is wonderful.

They are super present, my sister and her chum. They just had a baby, so a little less, but before that he kept her often. And now she has my chum, because now I have a chum. But she still has models in her life and everything. And otherwise, it's when my book came out, because I released a book last April, that I saw comments on social media,

not a lot, maybe three, but from frustrated people, it's really selfish, like Jess, and that's it. Things like that. I admit that it looks like I didn't see the difference, but let's say a single parent, someone who abandoned him, let's say I'm a little child and my father is leaving, but clearly I have an abandonment, while if it's a donor that you don't even know, then whatever, I admit that it's not the same thing.

Yeah, and you know that your mother did that because she wanted a child so much, so you were really desperate. It's not the same thing. Yeah, and you know that your mother did that because she wanted a child so much. Yeah. So you were really desperate. Yeah. So yeah, and you know, it always makes me laugh the argument of selfishness, because I'm like, but at the base, having a child is selfish, even when you're two. Absolutely. You don't say, wait, hey, do we do this for him?

We have a child, it doesn't take long, but we're going to do this for him. Just for him. Just for the other people. Absolutely not. That's it, Just for the others. Absolutely not. It's always selfish. When you grow up, you say, I want two children later, I want this, I want that. It's still a desire. And knowing that the psychologist had told me that he was super happy with those children,

I was like, how selfish is that? I could have fallen on a bad father for my. And it would have been even more sad. We never know. So yeah. And there was someone who wrote to me on Instagram when I passed by the podcast of Claudie Mercier. And there was someone who wrote to me on Instagram who was 16 years old and who said to me, well, my mom is a single mom, she got inseminated.

And just to say that I'm really fine. And my mom and I have a really good relationship. And I've never missed anything. It touched me so much. I was like, can I put this message in my single mom group? He said yes. I had done a screenshot. I put it in my single mom group. And everyone was nodding.

Everyone was like, thank you. Let's say there were some who were in the process. I had doubts. Thank you for sharing that with us. It was really reassuring. Are there any fears that you had before entering the process that turned out to be true? Or things that you didn't expect that eventually, it's a challenge a little more than you thought? Yeah, really. Well, honestly, sleep. I didn't think it would be a challenge. I saw people taking sleep coaches and I was like,

I'm going to do this and it's going to be good. No. No, no, no. I thought it was good for a year because my daughter had been sleeping with me for five months. There was no way to put her to sleep. I found it hard. Then, about six months later, we had done a workout on the sleep,

but still, where from? Because I wasn't able to just let her sleep for a really long time. And she slept well for six months to 18 months. And since she just turned two, since those 18 months, big regression. And it doesn't work out. Oh yeah.

And I find that hard. And I hadn't realized that I was going to be jealous of my friends who had chums, especially in relation to sleep. I have two friends, mom, that I got really close to during my pregnancy because we were in the group like mom or 2022. And I made friends in that group. And there's one who sometimes wrote to her, ah, my chum let me sleep this morning.

And I was like, I want to kill you right now. But you know, I love her, and I know she listens to you all the time. I love you, but for real, sometimes I was like, oh my God, what would I give for someone to let me sleep from time to time? So you know, I didn't anticipate it. I was like, yes, I'm able to do everything alone,

there's no problem, but yes, I'm insomniac, so I'm used to not sleeping. But it's rough. It's another type of not sleeping, a not sleeping because of a baby. Yes, because after you can't just chill on Netflix all day, especially not when you're in a maternity ward or that you have to work. Otherwise you take care of your child. You can't, it seems like you're no longer the king, until you're burned when you have a child long as you're burned as a child,

because you have to give it a minimum of energy. When I go to a party, the next day I'm like, yeah, it's... Yes, I regret it. I think I've only had one brush since I became a mom, and it was at my party, and my daughter didn't sleep at our place. She's the mother of us. She doesn't drink anymore.

I didn't drink before having a child, and I wouldn't have before having a child. And I wouldn't have had a child if I drank again, because that child wouldn't be in top shape. Maybe you should stop too. It's really interesting. I had to stop for myself before. Anyway, are there friends close to you,

people who have moved away during this process, who you thought were present and who are now in the process of being caught. Yes, yes, it's funny that you say that. Well, the one who was present during my birth. After that, she never gave me a new one, she never saw my daughter except when she came out of my vagina. Yes. But she had two children?

She had two children. That's weird. I never understood that. It's a two-and-one that I still do every day, I think. It really makes me feel bad. She was a close friend for a really long time. She told me she wanted to be at my birth. It was with her that I chose my donor.

She wanted to be fully present in the process. And she said to me, hey, our children won't even have that much difference. It's going to be so much fun. They're going to play together. All that. I'm going to give you all my laundry when we find out if you have a girl or a boy. The laundry because she has a boy and a girl. And then the more my size was getting bigger, the more distant it was. And I didn't understand why.

And then not long before going to bed, I went to dinner with her. I said, do you want to come to my bed again? Otherwise, I'm going to ask my mother, I'm going to ask someone else. And she was like, oh yeah. I was like, are you sure? Yeah, I'm just really busy, don't worry. Then I went to bed, and after that, I never had any news, she never saw my daughter again. And when I tried to throw her out to do something, she always had an excuse, and at one point she just said to me, sometimes life makes us move away from certain people, we naturally move away.

I'm grateful for everything we've lived together. Well, I'm sorry. Sometimes it's tough, it's nothing to be proud of. I'm grateful for everything we've been through together. Well, I'm sorry. Sometimes it's tough. It's tough not to know why. Like, it's okay, but I'll always wonder what I did. Sometimes it's not personal. In fact, it often has to do with ourselves.

Like, how... I moved away from people, and that's it. It's not their problem. It's really how I feel about this friend of mine who doesn't do you any good. And it's not them directly. It's really... That's it. Yeah, we change. I have lots of friends who...

Well, I don't know that I love them all, but I don't need them anymore. I don't need them for the moment. Can you name us other prejudices that people have? Other than what we call selfishness. Are there any other that you've heard of often? There was another one. It seems like I forgot it. But I haven't heard of it often, really. I've really, really been lucky.

When I released my book, I saw some little frustrated comments, but when you have haters, you're like... That means you do things on purpose. That's it, you start to get a little bit familiar. But I didn't do that to be known, but I'm happy people talk about the book because I personally, when I was in the process, there were no books. There were just Facebook groups, so I would have liked to have a reference. I think that's cool. But often, it's going to be people. I had clicked on the guy's Facebook profile, and it was like a guy who was like, live Trump, and his photo of cover was like, who blasted the gay, homophobic, and so on.

So it's people who are like, well, let's see, nature, it's a man and a woman who have babies and blah blah blah. But you know, it's also the same people who will say, go to the fertility clinic if you have problems, if you're not fertile, it's because God doesn't want you to have a child. So we feel like you're taking advantage of that. No, you don't want them to love your life, in the end. If they loved your life, it wouldn't be good news. Yes, that's exactly it.

But you know, it's for sure that there are people who are like, you know, just like I said earlier, well, in my head, a child needs a father and a mother and everything, and then, you know, sometimes you say, OK, so would you say that to a lesbian couple or a homosexual couple who want a baby? And then they realize and they're like, OK, yeah, you know, I admit. You know, the world that is not closed like the person I just gave you as an example, but you know, sometimes the world will have reflection and will say, OK, it's true. And it happens so much more and more. I have reasons why I want to talk about it. It was because I want all types of families to be normalized too.

When my daughter is going to school, in her class, she's going to have someone who has two dads, someone who has two moms, someone whose dad left. Recomposed families too. That's my dream and I'm realizing it. Recomposed families too. That's my dream, and I'm realizing it. Recomposed families. Your channel has three children! Yes, three children. I don't want other children. I don't really like the big size.

And it's not going to sleep. I'm not a masochist. So I found it hard. And also because I saw myself, even if I didn't meet my channel, I saw myself traveling with my daughter, doing lots of things. And it's more complicated things if I'm alone with two. So my lifestyle, all alone with my daughter, even if I didn't meet my husband, and it's more complicated if I'm alone with two.

So my way of life alone with my daughter was good for me. I don't want other children, but I was always saying, I did other podcasts, and I was always saying, my ideal is to meet someone who has children, because what I don't want to have other children is that my daughter will be an only child. And I would like her to be half-brothers, half-sisters. And, precisely, normalize the families too, because I've already dated guys, for example,

who had separated from their child's death and they hadn't been in mourning. For them, they had wasted their lives because it was a total failure, because we've been shown since we were young that you have to be a woman, a husband, children, you know, the American dream. But, you know, it's not a failure. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. And your child will be much happier if you separate than if you stay together when it doesn't work.

And yes, you may be going to make a life with someone else. And me, my parents, they separated when I was young, so that's maybe why I see it that way. I didn't grow up with the model of parents who got married at the age of 45. You know, I was a shikane, I saw them shickening. They're separated, they're clearly happier separated than together. So for me, it's normal. And it's one of the things that helped my reflection towards single parenting by saying to myself, well, nothing prevents me

from meeting the person, the man of my life after I became a mom. Because that's what happened to my parents. Oh yeah. And then, the dating, with... You know, earlier we were talking, and you start, it's harder, but it's easier because, let's say, the guy, like your boyfriend, clearly tells him, what I would find difficult, let's say,

if I broke up with him and I met another guy, and he has children, but there's a blonde, there's an ex in the background. I would find that to be extremely delayed with her that is not there, and that she has to educate her in a way. And I'm like all... And you say that with the new blonde in Louis at the same time. Well, that's it. Exactly.

With the ex of your new husband. And with the new blonde of your... Oh, that's true. There are too many people in the room. You're like perfect. I don't have an ex, it's perfect. Except that at's too much. There's too many people in the equation. You're perfect. I don't have an ex, it's perfect, but at the same time, someone who's divorced, if you want to date and you're in a shared house,

you date while you don't have a child. If I want to date, I have to keep it. So that's a little more complicated. But I already knew my boyfriend. Basically, he was a friend. It was a knowledge, in the time we worked in bars, on Thursdays. Then we ended up in the network, in the work environment, and we traveled every two weeks in a network group.

And then we became friends. And then, finally, he had ideas that we were more than friends. And I was chatting with Lucigno, you know, he came to my store in Blainville, and I lived in Rives-Sud, and he brought me a gift, and I was like, he's a good friend of mine, you know. But at some point, I realized, Blainville, pis j'habite à Revesseul, de m'apporter un cadeau pis j'te comme, « Y'est ben fin mon ami, t'sais. » Mais... À un moment donné, j'ai réalisé pis... Pis il m'a fait une genre de déclaration aussi là à ma fête pis...

C'est ça, finalement. Ça s'est comme fait tout seul parce que il m'a comme invité à la maison de ses parents, avec ses enfants, avec ma fille, t'sais. Il avait rencontré ma fille parce qu'il était déjà venu me voir pis... Ça s'est comme fait naturellement pis... T'sais, on a été capable quand même d'avoir nos moments sans enfants aussi, mais comme... He had met my daughter because he had already come to see me. It was done naturally. We were able to have our moments without children too. To see him with his children and to see how a good father is. That's what seduces me.

He doesn't stop saying that it's my dirty talk. He's teasing me. We sleep together and he tells me, I was going to bring the kids to the nursery, but he doesn't care. It doesn't make me feel bad for real, but he doesn't stop nagging me because I'm like, oh, I'm the good dad.

Oh! But have you ever dated a guy who, he's cold to them because you were single? No. No? No, but me, for real, since even before I became a mom, I decided that I just wanted to date dads.

I wasn't interested in guys who didn't have children. Because I had started dating dads, and I had seen so much difference. Because a dad separated, he doesn't have the choice to take care of another person who has him own, and I have the impression that it gives them a maturity boost that guys who are not dads don't have. Well, anyway, in those I dated, so when I started dating dads, I was like,

he brings collations, when we're going to have a date, he prepares a bag. You know, we're talking about those things, but for us it's normal, but for guys, it's like they're going to spy on us and things like that. And then I was like, wow, I really like being a dad. And you know, at that time I didn't have any children, so I still wanted someone else to have them. And then after that, well, finally I had my child alone and everything, but even after that, I didn't want to date so I wanted someone else to take care of them. And then, after that, I finally had my child alone and everything. But even after that, I didn't want to be the guy who wasn't a dad. I would be so spoiled.

A guy who doesn't have a child who's like... Everything is due. He doesn't understand that your priority is your... Oh my God, watch! It's true. Even more when you have a child, and I'm waiting for him, he's going to be a kid too, to be like, I don't have one,

and I'm going to get along with a child all the time. I thought it was going to be more difficult, but it's true that this point is really good, but I don't know, I don't know, I don't know if it's going to happen with Louis, but now, OK. I don't know, it seems to me, I don't want to meet another dad who has children,

and that he works differently, and that he manages... Because I see other children sometimes... Me too, but I was happy because the children show up, so wow! I wouldn't be happy if I did, but if I were to put myself on a stage, I wouldn't be happy. So it would really be necessary that the children... Yes, and there must be a good relationship with the ex, that it's not going to be a mess. It's difficult, it's a lot of criteria.

While a guy who doesn't have children, yes, it's perhaps more selfish, maybe, there are some, but we would say that it takes away the trouble. Yes, if he's really ready to adapt. I admit that the little lunches and everything, the dad who makes the little collages. I have the orientation, dad. You just lit me a bell. Yes, some are just bisexual, some are... I'm a sexual dad.

I understand. We understand the context, don't get out of this sentence from its context. No, no, no. I understand. But for a while, for example, I didn't want to date at all, and I didn't care. I was like, yes, one day if I met a dad, it would be my ideal so that my daughter wouldn't be an only child, but I was okay to stay alone for ten years. I made that decision by telling myself, I'm fine all alone, I don't want to have a boyfriend, and it was true.

And when I just gave birth, I had zero libido, but zero for months. Maybe if I had a chum, she would wake up, but she didn't wake up and it was really annoying because I had no one in my life. And at first, I thought I was scared. I was like, does it still work? I had points and everything, it stressed me out. And I was really okay. And that's it.

Finally, I had two relationships since I was a mom. And the two, it happened two of them came to me. I didn't look for anyone. My boyfriend was my friend, and I said to him, « I'm fine alone, I don't need anyone. » It was true. It's really very hot. How is the dynamic with your daughter, the dynamic between you and your daughter? My daughter, we're really close, but my daughter is a baby in my arms, really really really intense, she's always in my arms. Sometimes they're like, do you think I'm going to pass you solo? But my friend Vero, who's solo, her daughter, it's a question of personality.

Her daughter, she doesn't give a shit about her, to the point that when we go see Vero, Vero pokes my daughter in her arms and she takes takes hugs because she doesn't have enough affection for her daughter. So you know, my daughter really has an anxious personality who always wants hugs, who always wants to be in my arms. And if there are other people around, she will be embarrassed, so she will want to be in my arms. And it's really fun when she hugs me and gives me kisses, I find it really cute. But it's really draining too at the same time. That's one of the things I find hard, and sometimes I'm like, OK, I need a break, and my chummy is going to help me out in there,

my chummy is going to take it, and at first she's going to sneeze, but after that she's going to let herself do it, and she's going to leave me, like, for a moment, with a bubble, and I'm going to let it get into my bubble, and sometimes I'm like, OK, I can do this for two seconds, you know, I'm going to make her eat, she's going to be in my arms all along, otherwise she's going to be at my legs, and she's pulling my pants so I can take it, and she's to cook, she'll be in my arms all the time, otherwise she'll be at my legs and she'll pull on my pants so I can take her and she'll scream.

So that's tough. She has to drink her own. It's the contrast, she's in her games, no one, far from her, all the time, all the time, all the time. That's why you decided to have a second baby. If you had a first baby, maybe you would have...

I'm not closed to three either, so no, That's why you decided to have a second one. If you had a first baby, maybe you would have... I'm not closed to three either, so no. Yoann is really sweet. My second one is a little... he's not a tanner. No, he's so cute. It's just that he's really very nice. Yes, well, I'm also not a tanner, but really, really... She doesn't let me go. And that's annoying when you're alone, because it's not like you pay attention to your baby and you can tell the other to pee or... So I'm happy to have met my baby.

But for the moment, we don't live together, so I still have some moments... I'm still alone. So when you didn't have your baby, the moments where you lived some difficult moments, that we can still try to do like a baby, please, I need to take a break. You didn't have it, how did you feel at that time? And what did you do? Honestly, I lived with it. I learned so much from it. Since I'm single, since I'm single,

since I'm single, it's crazy. Let's say I have to do this, well, I'll do it later. I'll go and hang out with her on the couch. I'll give her her dose of love. I was thinking, if I gave her her dose of affection and I fill her reservoir of affection, like the Saranelle of this world that I adore, maybe after that she will let me do my stuff a little more,

I try to involve her in the chores, things like that. But honestly, I've lost control of a lot of things. Let's say I'll pick it up when she falls asleep and eat it. I try to do it when she falls asleep. And, you know, eating. I try to do it when she's asleep too, otherwise it's impossible. She wants to sit on me, and she won't let go. You know, it's kind of hard. So I just let go, I'm busy.

And that's it. I give her the affection I can give her. And that's it. And you know, for the dodo, that's her regression. I know it's linked to her separation anxiety because she wants to be with me. She comes to join me at night and I don't fight. I sleep with her. When did the nursery start? 11 months.

How did it go? Really well. I was really surprised. It was really scary for me because when I visited the nursery, the principal said, « Ah, it's for sure that if your baby cries for three months, we might meet to tell you that it's not a good fit. » « And we'll get you out of the nursery. » And I was like, « It's for sure that it's my daughter. » « She cries all the time when I leave. » « It's for sure that she'll cry for three months. » I was nervous.

You know, the anxiety. I was like, « She'll get me out. » « I'll have to drop my job. » « I'll be on the BS. » You know, I was far away in's gonna do me outside, I'm gonna have to drop my job, I'm gonna be on the BS, you know, like I was far away in my head. And finally, she loved the nursery from the beginning. She loves her teachers, she loves going to play with her friends, you know, sometimes she's gonna cry for two minutes when I leave. That's all. Very cool.

That's what you can never know. No. But I learned a little more like you, Luanne. I think it's going to be... Did you start looking after him? He started... He was four days ago, two weeks ago. The only time we were in Gaspésie.

And now he's at his second day this week. And we didn't send him more than three hours a day. Today he was there two hours. And it's a lot. Did you feel better today? We dropped him and he started screaming, and we ran away. Because if he sees us, I mean, it's not the idea to stay in the door and wait for him to stop crying. No, that's it. I know I was going fast, but often when I came back, he said to me,

Oh, stop crying, like, in 30 seconds, two minutes, I don't know how. Did he stop crying? Did he stop crying or? Yesterday. Because he stayed like, about. Did he stop shaving? Yesterday. Because he stayed like about two hours there too. Sorry. And we have an app for the hair salon where they put pictures. And basically they said that when he went out, he cried all the time when he was outside. And they put a picture in the group and it's just all the friends who play on the ground for the count.

And there's just my baby in the arms of the educator. Aaaaaah! No, seriously, it's terrible. Anyway. It's like five days, it's not, it's not long. It's her sixth day. Anyway. We have questions for the others, for you, a little. And also, I have another question before.

I want to know, since you've known both, you know, what we discovered recently is that we find that we're more competent when we're alone than when we're together. Do you also find that since you have your boyfriend who helps you a lot, you find yourself less... Because let's say that Louis is there, I'm more like, ah, I'm more into him. And then I have less energy, and then I'm like, ah, B, wait, you too. And then we finally, we're both screwed.

And then when I'm alone, I'm like, I'm like a little tabarouette. Hey, I'm the best mom. Like, even my children are like, woohoo, everything's fine, nothing. Oh yes, really, really. Yes, yes. And my boyfriend, on top of that,

his goal in life is to get rid of me, and to help me as much as possible. So when he's there, I'm like, go ahead. Oh, well, that's better. And it looks like I don't have the taste for anything anymore. But you know, it's been rough lately with his sleep regression on my daughter. And I'm still exhausted. You know, I'm on a work stop, especially because of that.

There are other reasons, but you know, that's it. He knows that I'm exhausted and he wants to get rid of me. So when he's there, it's like I'm enjoying it, but when he's not there, I mean, I don't have a choice. You know, it's a job at your full time, mom, and let's go even if I don't have energy. Indeed, I'm better. It's crazy, right? Yes. It's really crazy.

How was it for your daughter to welcome this man in life? Really good! She tripped on him. My daughter is a bit embarrassed at first, but it took a while. I think the second time she saw him, she was okay with it. It's funny because she had a hard time pronouncing his F, and his name is J.F., but she calls him J.S.

She tripped on him, and she sees his children, she calls him dad. She thinks he's called dad, so sometimes she calls him dad. But he just finds it funny and he's really good with it. So for real, it's really good. He's able to put her to sleep. Because if I try to put her to sleep, she wants me to stay by her side until she falls asleep. So sometimes I start, I'm not able to, go. He goes, and it takes two seconds, and she goes to sleep.

Is it a fear for you, you and your husband have a fear that you two are going to end up together? She lives without another father, so she sees him as her father, and then you two break up. Now there's a loss. Do you have a fear or did you think about it and now you're scared? What? We could break up. No, but for real, it's funny that you say that, because usually it's the kind of thing I thought about.

You know, I used to just date a guy and I was like, if I break up, etc. And it's weird, but my chum, I never thought we could break up. Well, right, I didn't do it myself. You know, because he already told me, you know, I'm coming into the life of your daughter, she's really young. It's for sure that I'm going to be her dad, you know.

And maybe one day I'm going to adopt her, etc. know. And maybe one day I'll adopt him, and so on. Normally, someone would have told me that before. I would have said, Ah, is she my daughter? No? You're cheating. And then he told me that, and I was like, Ah, it's music to my ears. And I just saw that positively.

I didn't even think about it, but... Yeah, indeed. My son is such a good dad, and he's so... He's really one of the best people I've ever seen in my life. I'm sure that in a few years we'll be separated, he'll keep in touch with my daughter, and I'll be okay with that. Yes, that's what I think would be a shame. If after 10 years, he's like, okay, you're going to go away,

and then there's no more relationship. I hope he doesn't do that, but if you say it's... Oh no, he's really a good guy. It, it's like the chum to my sister. I put him as my daughter's godson, and sometimes it's risky to put him as a chum, because they can separate, but I know that the chum to my sister is so involved, and she's such a good person that I know that even if one day they're not together, he'll be there, you know. And he's been in our lives for like 11, 12 years, the chum to my sister. It's like my brother. My sister doesn't like it when I say that. Because if it's my brother, it's his brother.

Ah, really? That's it. Good, we have other questions for you. Go ahead. Well, I have the impression that we've been told everything. Well, no. Okay, what do you do when you're drunk? Let's say you wake up at the clock because of the dangers.

What do you do? I cry. Ah, okay, perfect. It happened to me already to cry in the bathroom with my daughter on me. And I'll always remember, well, my daughter was really young at that time, but I had like written a post on my mom's group in the middle of the night, like, I was so drunk and you just had a girl who said, well, let your child cry, feel your negative energy, blah blah blah.

Oh my God, you're so... Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, no, I can cry sometimes. And then, now, I can cry sometimes. And now I ask for help. At first, I didn't dare to. And at first, it was harder to ask for help because I was breastfeeding. My friend had given birth at our place the first few days. I woke up at 45 minutes to breastfeed my daughter.

And my friend was asleep. The next morning, I was like, do you want some? I stay. I was like, you know, you don't know much because you can't go to my place. But after that, since I was no longer going and everything, and since my daughter is a little older, so that my parents are more at ease to keep her, I ask for more help. It's already happened that I say to my mother, I have to sleep, can you take her for the night? And no, no, no. And at first she wouldn't have been at ease, but now she's learning with her chum, and there's no problem.

So, you know, recently I was on a trip with my chum, improvising, like, we left on a headshot. The same day, I called my parents to keep it, and they said yes. I didn't think they were going to say yes. Because my chum, it was an element on her bucket list to just go to the airport without having to buy tickets and decide to watch the flight and say, I'm going there. I went to the airport with them.

I went to the airport with them, and they were like, come with me, I'll pay your ticket. I was like, well, my daughter'm like, I'm going there. I'm going to the airport with them. I'm going to the airport with them, and they're like, come with me, I'll pay your ticket. I'm like, well, my daughter is like, call your parents. They're never going to keep her for a week. Finally, I arranged a stop between my dad and my mom for a few days, and they said yes. Wow. And then I just left all alone with my guy for a week.

It really did me good. But my guy is sleeping, so I didn't sleep much more. That's another topic. How did the week go with grandparents? Really good. She sleeps better when she's with other people. That's why I say it's related to her separation anxiety when she wants her mom, because she sleeps better with other people.

It's really good because she's been to the nursery, and she likes the nursery. So, you know, it wasn't... We talked on FaceTime every day. She's two years old, I don't know if we said it in the podcast. Yeah, she's two years old. She just turned two. Aww. She's so cute, did you see that? No, I didn't see it. I would love to.

A little blonde with little eyes and a little... She's so cute. She has little green eyes that look like she's crying. She looks like an aunt, like a little girl, who runs around everywhere and she's so cute. She makes jokes. She's a two-headed joke. If you ever date someone,

we'll do it. I'm 21, I've always dreamed of being a young mother, but I don't see myself founding a family with the guys I meet. I want to start the process, but everyone tells me to wait and that I'm too young. Would you recommend it anyway? Clément, you said at the beginning. Well, yes, but I was still ten years older, at 21.

Oh, yes. Would you recommend waiting? Well, I would wait a little, but not necessarily because the others say you're young, but just so you're really sure of your decision. And I don't know where she is in life at 21. Does she have her job? Is she well placed? Etc.

But for real, if in two years you want to do that again, go. I met a lady when my daughter was four months old, who told me she had to go to therapy at 45 because she had never had the grief of not having children. ma fille avait quatre mois qui me dit qu'elle avait dû aller en thérapie à 45 ans parce qu'elle avait jamais fait le deuil de ne pas avoir eu d'enfant. Pis moi ça m'a tellement comme, peut-être comme, si j'avais pas fait ma fille pis que c'était moi plus tard, comme, je sais même pas comment j'aurais fait ce deuil-là, fait que... Mais tu peux quand même adopter, quand même... Ouais. Non mais t'sais elle allait... Toi tu t'étais tu dit, ben, est-ce que t'avais comme pensé à peut-être adopter si jamais, ouais? Mais j'avais même Did you ever think about adopting? Yes, but I had even looked at it before because at first I wasn't sure if I wanted to live a pregnancy all by myself. I had a meeting online with the DPJ, but for the adoption of the DPJ, it's like 7 to 10 years of waiting.

And if not, it's a mixed bank. It's that you're going to take a child in a foster home, and there are chances that you can adopt, but there are chances that you can't. But I was like, I can't, if I get attached to that child, and then they come back after two years or whatever. So I wasn't able to. So 7 to 10 years, I thought it was really long. Technically, if you put yourself on the waiting list, you can't do a fertility process at the same time. Because they want you to be 100% focused on your project,

to adopt. Even if it's in 7 to 10 years. No, not at all. Calm down. So I was like, OK, I'm going to start looking for inspiration. And it's crazy, it's when I got the results of my tests that I realized that I really wanted a child of my own, with my genes, and that I wanted to carry my child. When I thought that it was possible that I couldn't, I was like, OK, no, that's what I'm going to do.

And if it doesn't work, I'll go see the worst adoption at the International. It was in my aborted plans. Is it faster? I think so, but it's more expensive. OK. And it's not all the countries that accept single parents, for example. So I would have to find out. That's true.

If you were to redo, would you do things differently? What learning would you share with someone who is embarking on the same adventure? I think there are things you would do differently. No, there's nothing I would do differently, really. You know, it gave me my daughter and... You know, sometimes me and my chum, we're still pretty much the same. We met before and everything, and I'm like, no. Everything happened as it should have happened because her children are sick, my daughter is sick.

You know, like, we love our children, like, who are they? We're like, no, it happened when it should have happened. But sometimes we're like, our child would be really beautiful, but... Do you think you could potentially make a... No! I sent my chum to do the chup-chup. Oh yeah, you said that. That wouldn't happen. It would be really beautiful, but... Do you think you could potentially do a five? No, I sent my chum to do a chup-chup. Oh yeah, you said that, that wouldn't happen. But anyway, he didn't want any more, I was like, why aren't you doing a chup-chup?

So we fixed that, it just happened. Oh, it's just because he never took the time to do it? Well, apparently there's no guy who's going to do that, you're all gray. No, it has to be the blonde who gray hair. It has to be blonde. They're scared. Because they're going to play... It's true that it's scary. My father, my father, my chum thought it wouldn't work anymore.

He was like, did you tell me it wouldn't work anymore? I was like, it's not going to work anymore. There are so many men who do that all the time. There are risks. We don't want other children. But you, the dynamic, you're alone with your daughter, you have a boy and you have four children who walk around in the house? It's still a stock in crisis.

Yeah, but that's what I wanted. And I think it's cool that these two older ones are older, in the sense that let's say four children under four years old or five years old. You know, like preschoolers. Yeah, yeah, you're shooting a bullet. But there are others who are. Shoot yourself no bullet. But imagine, I wouldn't be able to.

But the fact that these two are really older, they are really mature, they are used to taking care of their little sisters. So there, they take care of my daughter too. It's so cute to see them go. And at the same time, my uncle is there half the time. So the other half is all alone, you know. And we don't live together for the moment, but for real,

we would like that because we still live far away and all that. So yeah, I like that. That's what I wanted, basically. Do you have stories in your mom's group, stories like horror or stories? Well, yes, there's a girl in my group of single moms who had an accident and was in the hospital for a long time. And her little guy was like 2 or 3 years old. So she couldn't take care of him.

And it was her parents who took care of him. And she was struggling. She didn't see him very often. It took a long time for her to recover enough to take care of him. I was following that. And I was like, this is one of the things that scares me. I had listened to a story at one point where a single parent's father died, and the little girl was looking for him and she was like, daddy, daddy.

I was getting into a crisis of anxiety because I was like, if I die, my daughter will look for me and she has no parents. It made me feel bad. Do you really pay more attention? Let's say before, I have a lot of things to do before, and today I don't think about myself, I think about my children. I don't know why I left them. I don't think my father is a good father.

But still, a nurse who dies. 100% I like to be more creamy. I'm really more creamy. Before, I didn't get that creamy. I was more like a knife. I like to be creamy. Yes, really. I was more like, I like to shave. Yes, really.

I'm more into things. Yes, me too. I've never been the most cosco or whatever, but just things like partying and being careless. I don't have any more. My best friend, my best friend

turned out to be a uber. I drink one glass, I drink one glass. That's it. I know I'm going to drink one glass. I'm going to Uber. One glass, Uber. All the time. And I'm like, my friend is like, stop it, let's take a glass of wine, it's okay.

I'm like, no, no, no. First of all, I can take two. I'm going to take a chance. And keep it, that's it. So I went to Uber and made a subscription. All the time there. All the time with him. But me too, if I know I'm going to drink, I'm really more careful about that.

But that, it started even before I had my child. Because you know, I'm still a lawyer, so I don't want to lose my right to practice. No, I'm not. For drinks, but you know, there are plenty of things I'm more conscious of, that I'm more careful about, and yeah, really. You're a little bit answering another of my questions, but it was, did you experience financial stress since you're alone? How much do you value the cost of a child alone?

Oh, that's true. I don't know how much I value the cost because I'm not a girl who does budgets and calculations and all that, but it still scared me because the cost of life, we're talking about it, it's expensive. So I was like, I'm just going to have one salary, whereas people usually have two. But I'm still lucky enough to have a good salary

and I'm lucky enough to have bought my condo before the pandemic at a normal price. So I was a little afraid, but it wasn't that bad. It was mostly the maternity congé that scared me. During the RQAP, you really have less money than when you have your full salary. But it was still good. I'm a fan of marketplaces, freebies. I got myself a lot of stuff.

I was fully honest in my shower. I was like, you know, it's to see the world I love and to have gifts. Baby stuff, it's so expensive. I talk about it in my book, but I'm like, you know, I'm honest, we need a shower. It's like the atmosphere. And you have to buy a lot of stuff, a bed, a chair, it's thousands of dollars, all the big pieces. You know, the pillow, the pillowcase, my parents who offered it to me for my shower, but you know, imagine someone who has nothing and has to buy all of that alone, it's intense.

My marketplace, I go all the time to store, and I always end up finding a lot of this alone. My marketplace, I'm going to store all the time. I always end up finding a lot of stuff, but I have a place to go to people's houses. And then I say, is it available? Yes, perfect, I'll come today and I'll never come back. I tell you, I'm really not. Finally, I say, I'm not able to go to people's houses. I should do it once. Do you have the world that you're not going to?

Yes, I finally won't take it, but it's not because I don't want to, it's because it doesn't seem like going to church. I'm happy that sometimes I'm not in the... It's more if I... Well, sometimes I want to go and look for it quickly. So sometimes I see something and I'm like, oh yeah, but I can't go today, I can't go tomorrow, or it doesn't seem like it. So I'm still available, yes, and I'm shocked because I can't go there. It's crazy, in fact, in the past, I didn't really go to church, I had intruders, to go and. It's crazy. I can't go to the intruders, go get their go-go.

It's like, it doesn't work. I didn't do it and I'm not capable. But I don't have the child I want. I can't do it. I have to do it. I have to put it as a challenge. But otherwise, start doing the free-price. The first time I went in a free-price, it looked like I was like, oh my God.

Finally, I tripped. there's so many beautiful things. Yeah, and for the kids, you know, the lingerie at 34, they put it on twice, and it doesn't work anymore. So it's almost new when you get a freeper. It's true, I have to do it. Do you do it yourself? Do you know you're at the market place?

No, I... Claude, yes. I'm... Claude, he's at the market place. Yeah. You too, are you like me? You're like us. Well, first of all, I don't like driving.

I have my license, but I don't drive. I'd like to go get a new one. And you're like me. First of all, I don't like driving. I have my license, but I don't drive. I'd like to go get a car. Your baby. I'd like to go get one. Alone with my baby in the car. No, I like my car. Oh, God. Do you have that?

We thought about it through the questions. I really saw your words throughout this episode. It's inspiring. I really drank your words throughout this episode. You're inspiring. You're going to give for real. There are probably plenty of future moms or moms, maybe. You give hope anyway and it's doable. We see that you did well and bravo.

I'm on a break from work. No, no, but still. I'm saying, yes, it's doable. And you know, when I arrived in the Facebook group of Maman Solo, when I saw that we were really a lot, it made me like, hey, you know, there are plenty of them, and they do it, and they managed to do it. And that's in Quebec?

Yes. It's Montreal and the surroundings. It's Maman Solo, Parchois Montréal, the surroundings. There are like 1200 people in there, currently. Wow, I don't know. Can you go there even if you're not... There's another group for those who are like in reflection or in process, it's single moms by choice. So that's just single moms who will answer for their mothers, who will answer those who have questions.

And sometimes I find that cool because I see a lot of people advising my book. There's someone who asks a question, there's someone who says, oh, go read the book, already a book. What's the book? Is it about that? Yes, it's Solo, Make the Choice of Solo Parentality. Make the Solo, okay. And then, what do you explain? Do you explain the procedure?

Yes, I explain my journey, I explain the whole story. You know, as much my journey before my pregnancy as after the first year and a half, roughly, of my daughter, basically. And, you know, I'm talking about sleep, I'm talking about everything. That's really interesting.

Did you have a sleep coach? Yes. Are you sure it helped? What do you suggest? Yes, but I suggest going with someone who respects your values and choices. I had a friend who had done it. I was like, I'm going to let her cry for so long. I'm going to never have her.

It was almost impossible. I had the same consultant, but I said I didn't have the tolerance. I have to let her cry as long as possible. She had made a plan that was suitable for me, that I could still go and reassure her. It still helped for real. There are a lot of things to do in terms of routine, in terms of the wake-up time to respect so that it gets better. My daughter didn't want to take her sissies, and when I started to respect the wake-up time, she took her sissies.

There are a lot of things that it has helped. But let's say at the moment, it has made a regression. It's because I didn't listen to the consultants in the week who said not to remove her basin before two and a half, three years. And me, well... Yeah. Ok, but do you want to give me some advice tomorrow, quickly? Yeah, because it's a time... Let's say 18 months, two years, because right now it's really a time of shit to change beds. They don't listen to you, they don't listen to the instructions. They're going to get out of bed, they don't care.

Whereas if you wait two and a half, three years, they're more able to respect the instructions, to understand the little clock, the clock, all the kit. So it's easier. Unless your child is able to get out of his pool and go to his security, you can make the change. But I didn't listen to them because my daughter was going through a regression and I was in the hands of a barista who was slapping her in the middle of the night.

I was still here in the bedroom, I was about to go to bed next to her. So I switched, even if everyone told me not to. Can you do it before? Like, let's say, two years ago? Well, let's say... But those who do it before, let's say a girl I know did it in nine months and she's doing great. Hmm... Well, nine months is not the time. Well, it's the bed on the floor. There are a lot of people who do it all the time. That's it? It's a mattress.

Oh, you don't have a pillow anymore? No, we never used the pillow. He didn't sleep in it once. So it's going to be easy for you? I'll sleep in his bed. Bye Claude, I love you! We'll sleep in our room. And others, quickly.

That's it, the wake up time. It's on the internet for babies. Let's say in months, it has to wake up an times, it's on the Internet for the age of babies, let's say in months and months. It has to wake up like an hour and a half between his sips, after that it's two hours, after that it's... You know, it increases with age, let's say. Okay, waking time, I'll go see that. Yeah, with the number of sips according to age, and then having a routine of sleep, you know, it secures the child. I used the white noise a lot, Now it's a little music for spoilers.

They say that it's not... It's true with you that we learned that it's not so... The routine is not important if it's not at the same time, but it's important that... The time for me, the sun, it's bath, story, massage, in the middle of the day. And after that, sleep. But if we don't respect that, it laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, the laundry, at home, I have to do it. There's a routine moment, it's really changing the bed, brushing your teeth, reading two pages of a book and then going to bed. It's okay. For him, he'll remember that there's this and that, so it's still five elements. It means sleep. And I'm going to sleep because he's grown up, so she wants stories, she wants things. But Luanne, I don't tell her much about stories.

I don't understand., but I try. How old is he? One year and one month. I read stories like that. I had integrated it into my routine. I'm looking forward to it. Right now, he does the routine with us. We listen to our own stories.

It's more of a school-like thing. We'll do the little readings. But hey, it's a long, long time. Louis is going to read a story. I'm telling it because I don't know how to read. So I was tired and I wasn't good at it. You don't know how to read? He makes me more tired.

I read it all the time. My daughter now knows the books by heart. So it's like, no, that's the little pig. I was like, okay, I read it all the time. So I said, hey, since I'm telling books by heart, so I was like, no, that's the little dog of mine. And I was like, okay, I read the little dog of mine. So I said, hey, do you want me to tell you a story? And she said yes, and I'm telling you a story now. And then I invented stories. And I said, tell stories of witches, and then the next time I said that.

So I was like, oh my God, I'm getting rid of all that. So he makes a book, I tell a story. And then after that, I approach it, and then I give a massage, because I gave a massage. So you put it on two, and then the other one will take care of her? Yeah, it's one-two. We switch. Louis does the book and his prayer. Because he does the prayer. And then I do the story and the massage.

Louis does the prayer. But during that time, are you already asleep? I do the prayer. I don't know anyone. And I hear my little girl repeating like... Like our father who said that? Impossible. He prays. I'm not nervous. And I hear my little girl repeating like... Hum... Hum... Hum... Hum... Ah, man. Like our father who said that. Impossible. Because he was saying that every day.

He thinks of his mom and he says it reassures her. He says he feels protected. And he says to himself, it will protect you. And she feels protected. It's not a lie. My uncle is crazy. And Luanne, do you sleep before? No, my uncle sleeps with Luanne even later. So, basically, while you're alternating...

Yes, we alternate. I'm with Luanne, and then Louis. That's it. But that's another reason why single moms have more than one child. I find them kind. You say, wow, you're good, but they're warriors. How do you sleep with your two children alone? What I do is when Louis isn't there, I put Luanne on me in a carriage. And then I say, I can't do all that. I do less and she understands.

It's something that would stress me so much. Because during the dodo, it's already stressing me out. And I'm just one. For a while, I had to stay with her until she was 100. And I was like, if I have another child at the same time. But the solos are good solo artists have more than one. Because there are some in my group. There are two or three.

They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. They are.

They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. They are.

They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. They are. We'll talk about more in-depth sleep, please. Because I like that. Do you have stuff to... Like, let's say your Instagram, your links, everything? Yes, well, my Instagram is jen.bradcha. And that's it. But then the book, as I said, it's solo, make the choice of the solo parenting by selling in all bookstores, on Amazon too, I think, online, on Trécoré,

the editions Trécoré. And the two pages that you said are also... Yes, the pages, it's true, the very square, the very square editions. And the two pages you said are also... Yes, the pages, it's true, the Facebook pages, Maman Solo Parchois is in Marien, then Maman Solo Parchois, Montreal and the surroundings. And there are some for other regions, but Montreal, we are like really more numerous in there. Okay, thank you!

I loved my mom. Yes, you're very good, no? Oh, thank you! We'll talk about it all your life. I've been doing podcast for a long time. Welcome to the official Patreon sexual orale platform. I'm here! I'm here! I'm here! I'm here! What can you expect from our Patreon platform?

It's live shows that we've never shown to anyone that you'll be able to see. You'll be able to ask questions for guests who come. You'll see one bonus podcast per month. Sometimes it's live shows, sometimes it's just us here who jam. After the podcasts, after the podcasts we're going to have recorded, we'll go directly on Patreon to film after shows. Announcements in advance, tickets, access to live shows. No matter what you choose, like whatever, we thank you in advance.

It's a big difference for Sexual Horal. It's something that grows, it's our baby, we're proud, we're happy. Yeah, and that's it. Thank you so much! A production from the SF Studio.