Shaun Newman Podcast - Ep. 111 - Nashville Predators Jordin Tootoo

Episode Date: September 7, 2020

Originally from Rankin Inlet, Nunavut he was drafted 98th overall by the Nashville Predators in the 2001 NHL draft becoming the 1st Inuk to play in the NHL. Super interesting guy with one hell of a story we talk culture shock coming truly from the great white north, racism even at the NHL level, and the role he played to earn a spot day in day out. Let me know what you think     Text me! 587-217-8500

Hi, this is Braden Holby. Hi, this is Brian Burke. This is Kelly Rudy. Hello, everyone. I'm Carlyagro from SportsNet Central. I am Jason Greger. Hi, this is Scott Hartnell. This is Quick Dick McDick.

Hey, it's Ron McLean, Hockey Night in Canada and Rogers' hometown hockey. And welcome to the Sean Newman podcast. Hey, guys, welcome to the podcast back at her again. Happy Monday, holiday Monday here in Canada. Before we get on to today's guest, let's hear from our sponsors. Tracy Clots, Titus Tools is a locally owned business. which Tracy formed in 1997. He has 40 years experience in the oil industry,

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make sure you let them know you heard about them on the podcast. If you're interested in advertising on the show, visit shan Newmanpodcast.com in the top right corner, hit the contact button and send me your information. We got lots of different options, and I want to find something that can work for the both of us. Now, let's get on to our T-Barr-1 tale of the tape. Originally from Rankin Inlet, None of it.

selected by the Brandon Wheat Kings in the 1998 dub draft and would play for the Wheat Kings from 1999 to 2003. In 2001, he was drafted 98th overall by the Nashville Predators, becoming the first in in in Knuck to play in the NHL. He spent eight years with the Nashville Predators. Following this, he would play with the Detroit Red Wings, New Jersey Devils, and finally Chicago Blackhawks. Over his career, he's played 717 games, 64 goals, 96 assists, 1,08 penalty minutes. We should note that Jordan lost his brother, Terrence, to suicide in 2002, and later while playing in the NHL, would enter in the NHL's substance abuse program in 2010. Since entering, he has been sober and created Team Tutu Foundation,

which raises awareness for suicide prevention and anti-bullying programs for use at risk. I'm talking about Jordan Tutu. So buckle up. Here we go. This is Jordan Tutu. Welcome to the Sean Newman Podcasts. Welcome to the Sean Newman podcast. Today I'm joined by Jordan Tutu. So thank you, sir, for let me come see your place here in Colonna.

It's beautiful. And thanks for sitting down and making some time for me. My pleasure, Sean. It's always good to do these things and share my story. Well, I was, everybody knows spit checklets, right? So the wife is from Minneapolis and she has nothing, no idea about hockey. Like she just, before she met me, she, you know, she's a volleyball, player, a lover to bits, and I said, oh, I had just confirmed Jordan Toot, too, too. And she goes,

okay, who's that? And I'm like, I'm sure he's been on spitting chicklets. I'm like, got to think about it, find you, put it on. And so then she learns more about the guys I'm interviewing than probably anyone else because I like to, I'm pretty much like anybody else. I like to, I like to, you know, volge. I like to read your book. I like to know some things before I walk in and not just ask dumb questions, which I'll probably have a few of those today. And she's learned a ton about hockey and so you're saying you've done a couple of these and uh spitting chicklets you were awesome on so i i mean i don't know if you're going to do another one of those anytime soon but while they're it's put out in the air a lot of people want to hear more stories i guess i don't know

i guess i'm just um somewhat of a good storyteller but hey when it's uh real life shit you you just go with the flow i guess that's how i grew up in nunavut right you just go with the flow on a daily and here we are in Colonna. Let's share some stories. Yeah, cool. Well, let's talk about growing up. Let's talk about up north and what life is like up there. You know, I come from small town, Saskatchewan,

so we have our own way of life. But when you burst onto the scene back in the world juniors, at least that's for me when I first learned of you, and kind of heard parts of your story, as all Canadians probably have, Canadians probably have. What was life growing up like growing up there? Well, I mean, I'm sure you can relate to some of the small town life. You know, growing up in Rankinilla at Nunavut, there's about 1,800 people,

fly in, fly out only community. So, yeah, pretty isolated and pretty damn cold. How cold? Like the average winter temperatures were minus 40 without wind chill. But yet we were out playing street hockey under the northern lights. You know, it's darkness probably 20 hours a day in the winter, you know, December, January, February. So it was pretty awesome actually growing up as a young kid. And you know how it is.

you can be a kid, right, in these small communities and not worry about the lifestyle that is put out there in big cities, right? Like as a young kid, I was able to, you know, walk the streets with my hockey stick and everybody knows everybody. So pretty friendly, but, you know, once those street hockey games would happen amongst us young kids, They don't get intense, do they? Yeah. I mean, I've had a few tilts in my day out on the gravel roads there. But yeah, pretty simple life. The materialistic shit doesn't matter.

You know, we easy living. You just go with the flow. Like I said, we drove quads in the summertime, skis-dews in the wintertime. Yeah, I guess one of the biggest things was for us is the hunting and fishing. It was a big, huge part of our culture and being out on the land. Roaming out on the land, you know, it's about survival mode out there. We hunt for our food. My father was born and raised out there.

So having his guidance growing up as a kid and to my teenage. years in adulthood I've have tremendous respect for for my father for for teaching me life skills right the simple things matter one of the I'll tell share a little story here I brought up a film crew up there and you know we're out on the land about a two-hour quad ride in inland it was middle of July, I believe, and, you know, the mosquitoes were fucking nasty. Like, you know, what's nasty mosquitoes like? Like black clouds.

Yeah, it was, it was bad. I mean, but you get immune to it, right? Growing up there and anyways, so I had this film crew and my father was saying, okay, Jordan, you see there's a little Esker, a couple miles down there, looking in the binoculars. I want you to take the film crew and just hide behind the Esker. And I was, I don't know, 16, 17 years old. And so I loaded up everyone on their quads and we drove the quad for about 30 minutes to this location.

And I'm like, okay, guys, set up your cameras. We'll do your interview here, whatever. And about 20 minutes later, we are all sitting on the tundra. Remember, we don't have any trees where I come from, so you can see for miles. So we were just sitting there, and I don't know if you ever watched a movie, Braveheart, but, you know, when the two herds are coming together, the ground starts to rumble. So we were sitting there and, you know, you just kind of have this funny feeling. Wow, like, what's that rumbling?

So I pop up my head over the little Esker, I guess, what we would call a mountain up in Nunavut. So I peeked my head over and there's like 150,000 caribou coming right towards it. So it was an unbelievable. It's all on camera. It was like the land was moving, you know, because the caribou are migrating. And so they're coming right to. towards us. That was the first time I ever experienced something like that.

And the camera crew, you know, they got all their cameras and they're freaking out. Like, oh my God, we're going to get trampled. I'm like, hey, guys, just fucking calm down. Everything's going to be all good here. I got a case of bullets. We're all good. Like, they're care we aren't going to attack us, right? When they're migrating, they just want to keep moving from the mosquitoes, basically.

And so, I don't know, they come within about 30 feet. feet from us. And I poke my head up. And the camera guy's like, oh my God, I got a $100,000 camera unit here. Like, we're going to get trampled and I'm going to get fired. And I'm like, okay, buddy, like chill. Chill. Chill the fuck out. It's all good. So anyways, they stop. And it was like literally like the movie in Braveheart, you know, when they all stop in one big line. And so I'm like, okay, so I load up my rifle and I just, I start firing away. And next thing, you know, the herds just, they're going everywhere. They're scattering.

And I run out of bullets. And, you know, I caught four or five caribou or whatever, you know, enough to feed the whole gang for a month or so. And so about an hour later, my dad comes up. and I'm skinning one caribou my dad's got a couple more by the time I'm done mine my dad's already done fucking four caribou you know so

the wily old veteran knows what to do with his eyes closed but anyways halfway through I'm cutting my caribou up and my dad looks over I mean he's like he starts giving me shit I'm like dude I just caught like five or six caribou here what like

he's like what the hell are you doing you you should have just let them walk right past you guys because they what they would have done when they're migraine they'll just walk and then just kind of walk around you i'm like that i like like like i fucking know what i've never experienced this and so he gives me shit about that and then he's like how many bullets do you have left i'm like uh nothing he's like yeah he starts giving it to me he's fucking idiot what if what have a what have a pack of wolves come or a polar bear you're screwed you know like i'm like well they got five carcasses here to chew on but you know my father being out on the land you know it's it's safety first and looking after you you respect the land the land will

respect you and you know it was a life lesson that you know if you have a case of bullets you know, you only need one bullet to kill one animal. You know, it's about savoring, you know, what you have and making sure that, you know, you don't overuse the materials that you have because you never know what can happen in the future, right? Like, I mean, it didn't even cross my mind that, yeah, what if a pack of wolves came around? You know, I would have been dead. We would have been dead, right? Like I got no ammo to shoot or pull a bear to shoot at.

And, you know, it was at that moment where I was like, well, you know, because as a young teenager, a lot of kids these days think, you know, everything's replaceable. You can get more. And there's always more of it, more of it. But my dad's mentality is, you know, you use what you only need to use. you know, because you don't know what the future holds, right? So it was a pretty neat experience overall. But yeah, that's just one of my many stories. I mean, we can talk for hours here.

We certainly can. I was, I've had many a different, enjoy interviewing people who are well older than me that have experienced those days when you didn't have a lot. and coming from a farming background on the prairies, you don't have to go far to talk to people who, you know, didn't have running water, didn't have power, didn't have all these different... Materialistic shit.

Well, and you talk about like, you know, they talk about taking a bath, for instance, or just water in general, right? And not having running water, so you've got to go and do it all yourself. And then bring it all, haul it up. While you're doing that 12 times, so 12 people can have baths, or you all just getting in the same bloody tub,

you know, one after another and whatever. And today, even I'm like, yeah, kind of like clean water though, right? Yeah, yeah. And as we get further away from that, at least down here, and maybe even up there for all I know, it just gets harder to remember those days because we're further and further away from every single, every day. Totally. And, you know, that's what's great about, you know, throughout my whole professional career, playing in the NHL and all that, being all over the world.

it's a it's a pretty humbling experience to go back to where you grew up and to and not take things for granted right you know when you grow up in a small community you know a lot of us take things for granted the little things right and and for me it was every off season i always made sure that I got home for for a few weeks to just get out on the land and to get away from the hustle and bustle of you know the world and and I think a lot of small town individuals can relate that way right you know I was always told by my parents that no matter where you go in life home's always going to be home You know, if you leave home at a young age to go experience life, different cultures, do that.

You know, it gives us opportunity to see what else is out there. Yeah, some perspective. Rather than kind of living in this bubble where especially a lot of indigenous kids, you know, growing up on reserves and really remote communities. I've always felt that I was an outsider coming south, right? Because I grew up in a community where everyone knows everyone, everyone's comfortable with what they have and they make the best of it, right? And when you're, when you leave home, for me, my experience was pretty tough. You know, I faced a lot of racism at 14, 15 years old.

I didn't quite understand what race. was back then because I never experienced it. But that being said, you know, it gives you a different perspective on the way you see things. But at the end of the day, you know, my heart and soul will forever be tied to where I grew up. And I'm sure it is with you, with people who grow up in Hillmont, you know, Saskatchew. Shout out to Hillmont. Hillman, I mean, my good buddy and a mentor of mine, I'm sure a lot of you guys know in Hillman, Mr. Wade Redden. You know, I look up to the guy since I was playing in my brandon weeking days.

You know, Reds played there. I'm sure all you guys know. But just, you know, tremendous people come from small towns, you know, very humbled and kind people. And, you know, you take your experiences and you teach them to people who grew up in very urban areas, right, that, you know, think they know everything and then, you know, that life should be a certain way. But we as small town community members, we see things from a different perspective. and actually, you know, shows people, you know, through, I'm sure a lot of people experienced through this whole pandemic of COVID that, you know, really, you, you don't need a lot to survive, right, to make it out there. As long as you're comfortable and content with what you have and you make the best of it and realize that, you know, when you put things into perspective, family matters, you know, just having a positive outlook on life and rather than dwelling on,

you know, the negativity that, you know, a lot of people experience, you know, I didn't come from a lot. But I knew deep down inside that I was going to make the best of my life, right? We all know that life is too short. And for a lot of indigenous people, I've experienced it firsthand. You know, it's your average Canadian is uneducated about the history. You know, all people read is, you know, what's put in the newspaper. and, you know, the persona that when people see indigenous people on the streets is to stay away from them. You know, I don't want to get into any political shit here, but, you know, hey, we're all human beings.

Let's treat each other equally, right? We all fight a fight nobody knows about. until we connect with each other, until we start communicating, then we learn. You know, you learn by listening. You don't learn by talking. You know, so for me, I'm one of those individuals who like to observe and to listen. If people ask me questions, I'll talk. But I'm not going to be the first one to, you know, start blabbing on about

whatever but but that's part of you know growing up in small towns right we observe we learn by watching i grew up i you know i wasn't a book smart kind of student right i learned our culture we learned by watching i learned watching my father he's a mechanic he's a welder he's a carpenter kind of jack of all trades but being out on the land is where I learned life skills through my father's teachings and I mean I'm sure it's it's the same in the farming world you know growing up in remote communities in Saskatchewan you know the kids watch their fathers their grandfathers and you know how to do certain things and you know that's the best way to learn and and and the other thing is

not being afraid of failure. That creates mental toughness because in order to learn and to move forward, sometimes you've got to take two steps back and those failures grow you as an individual. I mean, I guarantee you every professional athlete out there has experienced more failure than success. you know, I'm sure Wade, Corey Cross, you know, these guys who come from small communities,

we had to fight and earn what was given to us. You know, in today's world, I've seen it, you know, young athletes, young career individuals, whatever career they chose, they choose to do, they expect respect they demand respect no you go out there and you earn it by working your ass off putting one foot in front of the other you know and sometimes you're going to hit roadblocks but that's okay that that builds character and and for me you know I'm only five foot eight 190 pounds and a lot of people say how do you do it well i i give a lot of credit to growing up in the arctic because we had to it was survival mode every every day minus 40 minus 50 60 um battling uh

you know harsh weather conditions to survive that builds character shit like that you can't buy well that's experience exactly and that's what life's It's all about experiences, right? Get out there and experience as much as you can. Learn about different cultures, different traditions, be a lending hand to others. The racism one, you know, you say we don't want to get political. I'm not too worried about it.

By now my listeners know I'm willing to venture in anywhere because that's the only way you learn. And so the racism one I'm curious about. So I married an American, right, from Minneapolis. And so she challenges me all the time, which is uncomfortable, which I'm okay with. Don't all wives do that? Yes, they do. Growing up, I must have lived in a, in a, I don't know, man, a box because great parents can't speak.

Well, they're on the trip, you know, they told dad what I was doing. I'll drive, right? Just drives and away we go. and, you know, and then mum hops in it and they just tour me around and whatever. I just, maybe I blocked it out, but I never saw it. But then I read your book and you talk about it 14, I think, 13, 14. Yeah, 14. And then I was reading Wayne Grexie's book and please listeners don't get any thoughts here.

I don't got Wayne coming on just yet. But in Wayne's, he talked about being, right around the same age and getting absolutely, wasn't racism, but getting absolutely yelled at by parents because he was hogging the puck and like scoring too many goals and stuff

and you're going like, how the heck does that make any sense? Like parents are supposed to be, I don't know. Happy. Happy? That's right. Mature. I mean, they're supposed to be well versed in things, right?

Yeah. And yet, you know, I read your account. I talked to, had Theo on and read some of the stuff that Theo talked about. No, holy man, like the longer I go, the more I go, man, I either got the luckiest childhood, and I played hockey part way across the world, or my blinders have been on since the very beginning, and I just didn't ever entertain what was going on or something.

I don't know. But reading your account, I went, like, racism, 14? Like, it was that bad. Yeah, I mean, that's, you know, throughout my journey in this hockey world and in life in general, you know, a lot of it is being uneducated about your surroundings. And for me, being, I guess, the outsider in a predominantly white community, There is, you know, that those walls are up, right?

But it's the history prior to what went on, you know, in our grandparents era that has been passed down into, you know, and their children and then, you know, grandchildren and whatnot. And so, you know, the first time I ever experienced racism was actually when I was playing in a hockey tournament in Edmonton, Alberta. And, you know, all these racial slurs were being thrown at me. And I was 14 years old. I didn't ever hear these words before. But, you know, my coaches and, you know, parents in the stands that were on my team were, relaying the message to me.

Oh, you know, people are saying bad words to you. And so I started to second guess, you know, my culture and my traditions. Like, oh, like, how am I going to make it in this hockey world if I don't fit in? Well, then it got to the point where I had to start standing up for myself. And, you know, if any racial taunts were thrown at me, it was go time. You know, I wasn't going to take no shit from nobody. I don't think you took shit from anybody. But that, you know, that led into my WHL career,

into my professional career. I mean, it happened in the NHL. We're all professionals here. And, you know, when I got players from other teams throwing racial taunts at me about, you know, my heritage and my background, prior to sobering up in 2010, I was an angry individual. And, you know, I'd go on rampages on the ice.

You know, if a player from the opposing team said something to me, it was, I didn't give a shit. I was ripping your head off. When you say, say something, what were some of the things? Once again, I just come at it from a naive, like. Yeah, well, there's a lot of different terms, you know, like, for me, you know, go back to where you belong, you know, the little engine that could, you know, like little things, oh, you're red skin and all, you know, although I'm not Indian, I'm Inuk.

So a lot of these racial terms that were said towards me were in directed to the Indian culture, right the native american indian culture and uh and so you know like i i didn't hear these terms before um but you know prior to sobering up in 2010 like i said i was uh angry individual and you know any racial slurs that were directed towards me like i said it was it was go time it was go time and i didn't give a shit about you know feelings and then when i sobered up and started realizing that and having clarity and being comfortable and content in my own skin that I can't control what other people say are due towards me. All I know is I can go to bed at night with ease because I have clarity. I can guarantee you individuals who go

down that road are dealing with personal issues that they need to figure out, right? And that's up to that individual to look themselves in the mirror and say, you know, am I being the best professional I can every day? I mean, God, you're a role model for thousands of kids that look up to us, right? What kind of role model? What kind of example are you setting? are you setting for for these kids and so more often than not you know in in my sobriety and and playing another eight years in the NHL i started realizing that wow you know we all fight a fight no one knows about

until we communicate and and educate ourselves um i mean you no individual is going to change another individual unless they're willing to change themselves right it comes down to that and you know i'm not going to put anyone on the spotlight here but you know there's a few players you know after they you know i get it the emotions run high during hockey games you've experienced it like shit happens right but there's a line that is never to be cross and that's you know personal issues or family matters. Or family matters, yeah. You know, on the ice.

Anything else? You know, hey, whatever. Believe me, there's some refs out there listening to this. They always laugh because I've had to apologize to many a refs because when I get heated, I've been booted for a game for calling a guy, a dumb, you know what, or whatever happens, right? Yeah, it's heat of the moment. Well, it's a competitive game.

Absolutely. And, you know, when those terms were said towards me, I look at that individual straight in the fucking eyes and say, are you okay? You know, like, how's your home life? You know,

what's going on? You know, and you could see their minds start rolling like, holy shit. Like, you know. And after games, I had a number of players want to come and apologize.

You know, this is what I'm talking about. I can go to bed every night at ease. You know, I'm sure. those individuals for a long time couldn't get over with what they said when they were trying to go to sleep right and so uh you know for me it was always to be proud of where i come from and who i am and to help others understand um you know who we are as as people uh as aboriginal people or you know

whatever culture you come from, be open, be honest, and just, you know, welcome different cultures into your circle because it's a learning curve for all of us. Well, you go back to what you initially said about being in bubbles, and if you just go experience somebody else's bubble,

it makes your bubble bigger and you can understand where everyone's coming from. There's a lot of different bubbles out there. There isn't just two or three. No, and that's it, right? Like just being willing and, you know, being willing to learn. That's basically, even as adults, you know, we're learning every day if you want to put yourself in that situation, right? Like, who wants to live in a, I guess a bubble, right?

I mean. There are lots of people that want to live in a bubble. That's the crazy thing. Me and you sit here and talk like this, I guarantee there's a. like you see it all the time there's people that want to just it's it's like my family up in nunevud right i mean when when you're comfortable and content with what you have that's fantastic you know because uh you know i always you know playing professional hockey you know i'm just going to veer off to the left a little bit here you know a lot of us make a lot of money

And, you know, you start pouring that extra money you have into materialistic things. And you want to make sure your family's happy and whatnot. And I was pretty fortunate to have a family that, you know, understood that, you know, it's not all about the money. my father you know the guy would never ask for a dime if if he had to and that's one thing that i that you know would want to help my father more uh you know dad like what do you need because he My dad's a true hunter. He wants to be out on the land and basically live out on the land.

Jordan, I don't need nothing like nothing. But I knew deep down to get out on the land, you need gas. To feed the family, you need ammunition. And that's one thing throughout my whole NHL career. I always made sure my dad was stocked with gas and ammunition. And bullets. Yes. So, you know, and we look after our shit, right?

Small town people look after what, you know, you savor those, whether it's a combine or a farm truck, right? Those things you look after it, right? And like it's just not a, you don't have the mindset of, ah, I'll just get a new one. you know, if this breaks down. Can only afford one. Yeah. Couldn't afford the one you had. Yeah.

So, I mean, do you ever take, do you ever take, you know, I'm assuming you get asked all the time about, you know, the culture change from going from up north to coming down here. And the funny thing is, then I go down to the States and they think here is up here, right? So it's kind of like, it's all relative. But do you ever take anybody from further down south up north? Yeah. And what do they got to say about that? They're just like, they don't know what to think. Scotty Gomez played in the NHL for a lot of years.

And I happened to play with him when I was in New Jersey. And Gomer is, he's from Alaska. So, you know, kind of grew up in the country and, you know, all the hunting and fishing. And so after my first year in Jersey, Gomer called me. He's like, hey, when are you going home? I want to come up there with you. So next thing you know it,

Gomer is up in rank and with two of his buddies from New York City. Okay. You're living in Manhattan. These two guys. This is probably, that'd probably be the most extreme, wouldn't it? New York City?

New York City to, yeah. Mom fuck nowhere. So within, uh, Basically, a 24-hour span, they flew from New York to my hometown up in Rankin, Inlet, Nunavut. And my father and I and a couple buddies, this was in the springtime, so end of April.

Weather was still a little chilly, minus 20, minus 15. We packed up our sleds, got everything ready. My sister is a seamstress, so she made them parkas and wind pants and all that. And we drove for three hours on the skidoo. My dad took us to one of his cabins. And, you know, Gomer was just like, he's never experienced stuff like that, right? Remember, we don't have any trees where we come from. You know, it's tundra.

And then you got these two New Yorkers. We were sitting in the cabin and they were looking around and they were saying, where the hell am i you know going from new york city to just a little 250 square foot cabin in the middle of nowhere and you know and to them they just you know that that quietness of just being still and listening to nature and you know the wind they've never experienced that and yeah it was You wonder if you change their lives. I guarantee you they still talk about that experience. Well, I have to.

I mean, you know, going out hunting for caribou, ice fishing, Wolverine hunting, wolf hunting, all within four days. They just, they couldn't believe it. They never knew this kind of shit existed, right? And so those are moments where, you know, life memories happen and showing our culture and our way of life to other people is is something I totally enjoy um you know for I got pictures videos of of these guys just like they they were speechless right like you know going to bed at night with six human

in a 250 square foot cabin, you know. Sounds amazing. The one guy is saying, okay, where do I take a shit? I'm like, go find a bigger rock to hide behind and take a squat, buddy. The other guy is saying, oh, where can I have a shower? I'm like, fuck, grab some snow and scrub yourself down, you know. So those things, you know, they've never experienced that. So it was pretty cool.

You know, if you had like a GoPro or a camera sitting there to watch your expression, that'd probably be a similar expression to small Saskatchewan boy, maybe even yourself going and hitting New York City. Oh, yeah. New York City is the, I like to think of myself as a guy who can't get lost, right? Like, you know, I kind of know my directions and, well, there's a landmark walk towards that. I don't want. And New York City, with all the skyscrapers and all that, you can't see nothing.

No. It is the most confusing city in the world, and I've been lost there because I'm a lake to walk. I'll go for a walk. It's a strange place. It was funny. In 2003, when I made the National Predators, one of our first road trips was to New York. And at that time, my roommate was Jim McKenzie, the big, big old tough guy. You know, the guy took me under his wing, and I remember Macer saying,

Truth, let's go grab a coffee in Times Square. I'm like, sure, let's go. You know, I'm a people watcher. Well, next thing you know what, there's a million people around, and I can't find Macer. You know, and about half an hour later, I see this big old bison head walking. around Jim McKenzie and I'm sitting there and I could just see him like you know he's perching himself up on like garbage cans to try and find me and next thing you know he's like toots he's yelling toots where are you are you out there and it's funny because you know I've

never been around you know thousands of people in in a congested area like that it kind of freaked me out. I was just like, wow, like I can't handle this. Anyways, we go back up to the hotel and I open up the blinds. It's like 11 o'clock at night. I open up the blinds and I'm like blinded by all these lights. I thought it was like still daytime. Well, it's all the, um, the lights in time square. You know, everything was just lit right up and it was just, wow. Like, you know, for a small town boy walking around New York City was yeah I'm sure it was the same with the guys coming from New York to New York yeah vice versa right yeah absolute that is like culture shock it isn't even remotely close yeah and and that's another thing when people kind of who grow up in small

communities, right? You know everything you need to know to survive. When you leave your community and you're kind of outside of your element, especially for a lot of young athletes who have to leave their community, don't last very long because they're so comfortable and content with the lifestyle that they have lived all their lives in these remote communities. So what happens is a lot of, you know, very talented athletes that come from indigenous communities end up leaving the city life to go back home rather than sticking it out and pursuing their dreams of whatever they want to do. it's I can understand because I can relate. I was one of those kids who left home at 14 and two weeks in.

I was like, get me the hell out of this city. I can't handle all these people, all these high rises and whatnot. But it was my late brother, Terrence, who, um,

you know, just kept kept me on the right path. It's just stick it out, Jordan. Home's always going to be home. Uh, you know, just stick with it. And every day for probably two years of my first time leaving home,

I battled through a lot of those things. And for a lot of young athletes, right, it's, or whatever profession that individual chooses to do, tradesmen, whatever, the first few months are probably the toughest when you first leave your community. But it's it's up to you to make that you know a priority to to just stick with it one day at a time because eventually it's going to get better, right? There's no end date to when things get better but I've learned that if you just take life one day at a time and just be your own person.

Just be you, right? Things will get better. And God, I never imagine at 14 years old I was going to play in the NHL at 20. You know, I just worked my ass off every day and earned everything that was put in front of me. And that's what it's all about, earning your respect. I bet if you took a poll of hockey players,

I bet it's over 90% in the first two weeks of moving away from wherever they're at, have that phone call where they make to somebody, because I certainly had it out. I was out in Dryden, Ontario, and I had a lovely Billet family. Couldn't ask for a better family. Shout out to the lanes, like three years of them. They were fantastic. They became my second home.

And I still wanted to go home. I had to call and talk to my oldest brother. And he talked me off the ledge of staying out there, and you know, and you're right. It gets better. I found it interesting in your business. book you and Terrence would send faxes to each other. I thought that was great. You find a way to make things better, right? And that was our way of connecting with each other. You know, back in the

mid-90s, right? There were no cell phones or internet or whatever. And, you know, making long-distance phone calls for hours on end. It was expensive. It was very expensive. So, Hey, we had fax machine. So we would write conversations on piece of paper, fax it over. I would wait for his. I mean, I pages, thousands of pages of conversations with my brother. And, you know, those were moments where it kept me on the right path, right? But ultimately, it's up to that individual to make a choice, right?

it's life's all about choices. I mean, there's going to be consequences to some of the choices that you make, but that's what, you know, that's how you mature as an individual. Hey, some of the choices that I made in life were, you know, could have been devastating. You know, could have ended my hockey career, you know, many other factors. But I owned up to them. And only that individual is going to be able to, you know, when you look yourself in the mirror, you're the only person that's going to, you know, change for the better.

Yeah, we all have a dark side to us. And I get it. I lived in darkness for 20 years, right? substance abuse, um, bad, bad decision making, but I owned up to it.

And, um, why, why could, uh, um, um, to hop in on that?

You go to, um, uh, substance abuse, whatever it's called, uh, down south at the canyon. And for a lot of guys,

they relapse a lot. And then eventually work their way out of it or maybe never. What was it about the first time for? you that just was like, I'm done. Yeah. Well, every individual is different, right? And for me, it was out of respect of, you know, myself. But I, I, you know, understood that I can change a lot of people's lives by stopping one cycle and starting a new cycle.

not only for for myself but for my for my family it you got to want it because no one's gonna do it for you right for me relapse happens to a lot of individuals because they are so comfortable and content with the life that they were living and now you go to the other side where the fear of the unknown, the fear of being sober, they don't know what that is, what that kind of life is, because they've perfected the life using substances

and, you know, that made them happy. Well, deep down, does it really make that individual happy? it's about being resilient it's about having fortitude in in changing your life because it's for me i knew that if i didn't stop doing what i was doing using alcohol to suppress my feelings that i would be the next victim you know my brother Terrence we we never ever talked about our feelings uh we never talked about real life shit you know the way we grew up in dysfunctional family we use alcohol to kind of forget about everything that was going on at home um but i knew deep down inside that if i if i If I didn't stop using, my hockey career would have been done.

I did it for, to raise a, you know, to keep my brother's legacy on and to show people that, you know, it doesn't matter where you come from, what kind of success you have, whether you're a professional athlete, you know, a multi-million dollar business. owner um substances don't they don't judge and uh you know a lot of people early in my career would constantly say oh jordan you're so lucky you're living the life of a n hler you're so lucky but deep down inside i was hurting and uh for me i there came many times where i didn't see light at the end of the tunnel and I thought you know I had suicidal thoughts you know after my brother passed away and it just came to the point where you know what I got to do it for me first and foremost secondly to to stop one cycle and start a new cycle for

for my family and you know be a role model for for the indigenous community to show them that hey uh you know if if i can do it you can do it too but that being said you got to put in the work you know life doesn't get any easier when you when you decide to to put down whatever substance that you choose and think okay i'm going to stop today life's going to be way better tomorrow and so on no it actually gets fucking harder right two years into sobriety man like i wake up every day and be like fuck why why are people testing me every day that i felt like that right but it was it was uh those inner demons that were were taking me down that path uh you know didn't it was probably three four years into sobriety where i started

to realize that, you know, sharing my story and actually telling the truth and, you know, putting pen to paper to go through my life's story and to get weight lifted off my shoulders. Probably for two years, I got, you know, didn't realize how many people that I hurt in, in whether, whether it was in the hockey community, family, fans, right? When I was out partying, I might have spelt a beer on somebody. You know, these people were coming up to me, hey, remember you spelled a beer on me, whatever. And, you know, for me, it was a time to tell them that I'm sorry, and it was weighed off my shoulder.

Just imagine two years, like, of those constant stories of how many people I affected. And that's what I was talking about. like every day was like a test, you know, people want to see me fall off the wagon. But I knew deep down inside that when I put my last drink down, I knew I was done. And, you know, I couldn't have asked for a better gift to be put in front of me to sober up. Mr. David Poyle, the general manager of the Nashville Predators. my coach Barry Trots, Brent Peterson.

You know, these guys cared about Jordan Tutu the person, not Jordan Tutu, the hockey player. And still to this day, and Mr. Kelly McCriman, who was my general manager through my Brandon Weeking days, these guys believed in me. you know Kelly McCriman God I actually had a chat with him yesterday and you know

he's been a mentor of mine since my junior days you know although we butted heads a lot I was called into his office many times for my off-ice actions antics whatever you call it but

you know our relationship now is stronger than it's ever been because you know as he has ever been because you know as a young kid you don't realize how much someone cares about you until you figure you figure your own life out and and look back and reminisce and and and talk about your experiences uh you know keller mccriman to be honest was probably the one who gave me the the opportunity to uh to have a career like i did and you know uh and and for barry trots and david

poil to see that, you know, I was fighting a fight that, you know, the outside world didn't know about, it gave me an opportunity to play more years in the NHL. I really appreciate you sharing that. That's pretty powerful stuff. And I think a lot of people that are battling different things, whether it's all or, you know, there's a lot of different ones out there. Totally. I don't like to go into the dark or the darkness that was part in there,

but I think for a lot of people, they probably didn't realize how alcohol taken hold of you. What was the lowest point of your drink? Like, was it that bad? Well, you know, for me, my drinking, it wasn't like, woke up every day and I needed a drink. I was more of a binge drinker. Um, you know, when, you know, it all started back in my early teens, right? Because I, you know, my parents were alcoholics. So, you know, the first time I ever tried to drink, I was probably 11, 12 years old. And I thought it was

the greatest thing, right? And, and so into my teenage years, you know, uh, I just took a liking to it quite a bit, right? It kind of goes hand in hand with playing hockey and all that and, you know, trying to fit in with your teammates and, you know, the older teammates and so on. But and then at 19 years old, my brother, being three years older than me, always growing up took me under his wing and looked after me. and um but like as i mentioned earlier we used alcohol um to bond with you know with each other and to hang out and and to kind of forget about you know the the outside world of you know how we grew up

and and whatnot and you know we were each other's backbone and you know playing junior hockey with my brother for a year in in 98 99 you know living together in our billets family we we drank every time we got the green light and it was full throttle and I'm sure a lot of a lot of guys can relate you know when you get a green light on a Saturday night and you got Sunday off it's we go harder you know it's you know pop the the cap off the bottle and you drink it until she's done. But, you know, that all, you know, led into my professional career. Well, fuck, I'm 20 years old. I'm living on my own. Yeah. I don't have, you know, bill at parents to tell me, you know, what time dinner is.

And you got money in your pocket. And I got money in my pocket and, you know, I'm single. Well, and you're, you're a fan favorite. the style of hockey you played. I mean, we were talking about it before we started. Well, I think maybe we're at the start is the world juniors when you came out and were absolutely crushing people. It was awesome, man.

Yeah, I think that tournament was what put me on the map. But, you know, prior to that, you know, like I talked about Mr. Kelly McCormon, you know, playing in Brandon, I was the leading goal scorer of the WHL. I was the leading penalty minutes guy you know I was basically how big are you 5 foot 8 and a half in the program on 5 foot 9

but you walk around like you're 6 foot 4 like it's awesome but you know my junior days I started become cocky you know my 18 19 year old year because I was like okay I'm leading my

team. I'm doing everything. I'm doing my job. But yet my off-ice antics, I started noticing, you know, my teammates not wanting to hang out with me because, you know, Tuesday, evening or whatever, I pick up a case of beer and, you know. Yeah, you're taking a whole new meaning of playing guilty. Exactly. And, hey,

hockey guys out there, you guys know what guilty hockey is. Yeah. I played guilty hockey for, God, 10, 12 years, you know, my junior career into my professional career. How good did you feel once you were sober then? Like, I mean, you mentioned that it was tough, but like how good did you feel your body? Because, I mean, you take, when we were having Casey,

I think it was like 41 days. You know, I like having stints where you just, ah, cold turkey, go for a little bit. I enjoy a good beer, though, or a good scotch. Yeah. But it took about 41 day. And like, it's only like day three, man. You're like, oh.

Oh, yeah. No, well, it's a different life, right? Like it's you, I, like for me when I sobered up, it was probably a year or two into sobriety where I started having clarity, you know, thinking with a clear mind and, you know, doing things with a purpose. you know when I was abusing alcohol playing in the NHL you know my role was a fourth line player you know five to seven minutes a night getting a couple tilts do your job and you know that's how I became you know basically a fan favorite in Nashville but I use my popularity as a tool to oversee, you know, my off-ice antics, you know, I'd go all party on a Wednesday night. You know, I knew for a fact that coaches, you know, Nashville is in a big city.

They knew, you know, where I was and party, you know, because I'd show up, you know, Tuesday or Thursday smelling like booze or whatever and take Thursday off and play Friday and you know dominate fight a couple times and we'd win and I'd be like fuck I did my job guys like what are you going to do about it now right like so I use that for many years and then then I started playing more minutes well you know when you're not looking after your body it shows on the ice and so you know Third peer had come along and Trotsie would just sit me because he knew I was gas and I couldn't handle it. You know, being called into the office too, so you got to look after yourself more. You're playing more minutes.

We need you. I'd make packs to my teammates. Okay, guys, I'm going to lay off, you know, I'm going to hang low. Well, the next day off, night off or whatever is right back at it. And so, you know, my teammates started kind of. of veering away from hanging out with me. And now I was seeing this at a professional level, right? Where, you know, the normal thing to do was to go out for a few beers after a game.

And, you know, I'd ask my teammates and say, where are you going? Oh, I'm not going out tonight. And, you know, then eventually I was hanging out with people away from the game because my teammates didn't want to be partying with me until three, four, five in the morning, right? You know, guys have families and stuff. And so when I sobered up, it was, you know, probably two years into, you know, playing hockey with a purpose, you know, knowing my role. And that adjustment was, I think it was a time in my professional career where I was a, wow, now I own what I do. And I take ownership, you know, no one else is going to tell me how to play hockey or what to do.

You know, now I was taking ownership in playing my role to the best of my ability. My minutes start to go up. My opportunities were, you know, coming towards me. And I was like starting to feel comfortable with this new life. And like I said, it gave me eight more years. of playing in the NHL. Brett, a little bit of confidence. Yes, absolutely.

And, you know, for everyone, it's different, you know, building, building that confidence. But for me, everyone, everyone hits their rock bottom in different ways. You know, my rock bottom was, you know, if I don't end this substance abuse now, I'm going to be in the same boat as my brother, you know, six feet under and that's not what he wanted for me. And yeah, here I am today with a beautiful wife, Jennifer. We have two very healthy young girls and yeah, it's been a blessing for me and to see life from a different perspective has been pretty amazing. That's a you got a very unique story and it's super cool to sit across from you. Just checking the time.

It is 20 after four. So I assume we should move it along. I know you got people coming. So why don't we go into the final five? I got to say I've really enjoyed this. We can go on for hours here. But, you know, in retirement, I have a lot of daddy duties on by hand. I'm sure you know, but hey, it's all good.

No. We don't hear anyone screaming and yelling yet, so we're good, we're good. Well, you know what we do. We just, we get you on for part two and we'll beat spit and chicklets to it. That's what we'll do. But let's go into the final five. There's just five questions, long or short as you want to go. And shout out to Heath and Tracy McDonald from Crude Master.

I've been supporters of the podcast since the very beginning. So my first one, and I love doing this one because everybody's got a different take on it. But if you could do this, so you could sit across from one person to pick their brain, who's the guy and what's the question you'd ask? For me, it would probably be sitting down with Stan Jonathan. You know, the guy who's an ex-N-HL indigenous player, Boston Bruins. and the one question I would ask him probably is what got you out of your community?

What drove you as an indigenous person? You know, because you got to remember back in that era in the 70s, 60s and 70s, you know, for indigenous people, it was a pretty tough life, right? you know, talking about residential schools. And, um, but yeah, Stan Jonathan, you know, would probably be my guy. That's an interesting pick. I've met him a few times, um, briefly chatted, but I wish I had more, more than five, ten minutes

with him. Yeah. Yeah. It's one of the, uh, it's one of the interesting things about doing this is, uh, uh, uh, you know, uh, it's one of the interesting things about doing this is if you just listen I mean it's it's just it's cool to sit and hear guys perspective and their stories and it's one of the reasons I love doing this it's it's so much fun and I get to learn the entire time right it's it's fantastic yeah the more I think of that question um the more people come to mind uh you know for me uh interviewing our elders

in our communities, interviewing people who have been through the meat grinders and have experienced hardships and, you know, what's led them to be successful and to fight through, you know, that adversity that me and you have never experienced, right? You know, we think some days are harder than others today, but God, there's no comparison to what our grandparents went through their parents, you know, and so on.

So, uh, just talking to older individuals who have experience and perspective and everything else. Yeah. And just listening to them, right? Like that's I, I,

uh, I, um, people listen to podcast already know this, but I started working with the Lloydminster Archives. And so I get to go around the area and interview people who are roughly between 70 and 90, let's call it, and talk to them about their lives. And it is absolutely eye-opening. I couldn't imagine. Yeah, it's just, well, it's a look into a different time in a different world because it's changed so much. Oh, totally. And And for our, especially the Inuit culture, you know, surviving in God, those kind of conditions, right? Like, you know, every time I go home or to other remote communities, one of the first things I try and do is to connect with our elders, connect with, you know, especially when I go to,

When I do my public speaking on reserves and stuff, I always make sure I spend time with the elders because it shows to the younger generation that, um, although times have changed to never forget what our grandparents went through and to our heritage our heritage and to, you know, to connect with them that way, to help them heal from what they, been through and to conversate about life

and to learn, right? Like, just sit there and listen to them, talk is just amazing. If you could pick, we'll go to a hockey question. If you can pick any two line mates to hop on a line with you, who would you take? Ah, boy.

I would love to play with Gino Ojic. Gino? Another indigenous icon in the hockey world. Yeah. And, oh, man, I'm a, I'd be on the right wing, Gino would be left and, uh, big old tough guy. Uh, what's his name there?

Looked after Wayne Gretzky. McSorily? Nope. Um, oh, God. This is terrible. Uh, come on, come on. Dave. Samanko.

Yes. I mean, God, imagine me being that little pest with these two heavyweens. Nobody would mess with you. Nobody would mess with you. Yeah. I was pretty fortunate, though. When I played in Nashville, I always had two or three heavyweights on the team. You know, Brian McGratton, Wade, the late Wade Bealeck, Jim McKenzie, Jamie Allison,

Brendan Witt, you know, the list just goes on. I was able to do my job playing hockey because I knew, you know, I had two big... Some backup. Some heavy, heavy backup. If you could be... If you were traded to, you know, you're playing for Nashville and you're getting traded to wherever. It doesn't matter. If you could bring one guy with you, one of your teammates along the road, it doesn't have to be on Nashville.

It could be any of the teams you played and you were going to get traded. If there was one guy, you're like, that guy's coming with me. Who would you bring along? Scotty Upshaw. Scotty Upshaw. Scotty Upshall. Yeah. and upy go way back to our early teens and we've been we've been like brothers you know fortunately

we were drafted to Nashville prior to being drafted you know we were good buddies he played in camloops i played in brandon whatever you know but throughout our whole junior career we were tight and then we got drafted to Nashville we played with each other and still to this day where as tight as any bros out there could be. So Scotty Upshaw would be my wingman. If you, on this actually could be multiple, did you have a mentor? You know, you've mentioned your father a lot.

You mentioned in Nashville, Barry Trots and Poyle and guys like that. Did you have one guy that sticks out that kind of mentored you? Was it a tough guy? You know, you talk about the big guys, protecting you and that kind of thing. Was there one guy who kind of showed you the ropes or taught you a good lesson along the way? Yes, my brother, Terrence.

He was my hero, he was my mentor. He guided me. You know, he was three years older than me. So he was the one that gave me strength every day to basically live to fight another day. You know, whether whatever situation you're in, to just put your head down and then grind away. And yeah, I mean, to be along his side for 19 years of my life,

still to this day, I instill a lot of his teachings, you know, not only with myself, but with my kids and to show them that, you know, it's all about mind over matter, right? When you think times are tough, just think about what our elders went through. Think about what our parents have been through. Mind over matter. So my lay brother Terrence is, yeah, he gave me inspiration to live life every day to the fullest and to, you know, keep his legacy on through my passion of working in the indigenous communities

and to be a role model for our people and to show them that there is light at the end of the tunnel. And, you know, we all fight a fight no one knows about. So, and, you know, for my brother, I didn't know he was hurting that much to go down. that path and take his own life because we never talked about it you know you know for me now it's about being open and honest uh you know it's one of the reasons why i wrote my book to help me heal as an individual through the the experiences that i've gone through um to put pen to paper and to relive those moments and and you know turn the page and to move on uh yeah so he's been my inspiration every day.

One final one. What is coming from the Great White North, the true Great White North. What was one luxury, though, when you came down here, you were like, oh, thanks, sweet Jesus. This is beautiful. Well, Winnipeg was the closest big city.

Okay. It's a three-hour flight from my hometown. And I remember, this pizza place called gondola gondola pizza thin crusts it was I mean we couldn't wait

as soon as we landed got to our hotel room the first thing we ordered was gondola pizza yeah that was it and still to this day even when we go play the jets get to my hotel room, order gondola pizza.

Yeah, pretty simple, but... There's nothing like that. There's the simple things in life. Exactly. Well, thank you, sir, for carving a little bit of time out for me. I really do appreciate this. It's, you know, been a true honor to sit across from you. My pleasure.

Thank you for having me. Anytime round two, let me know. We'll get into some real good stories. Hunting stories. I'm sure a lot of you hockey guys out there want to hear more hockey stories, but yeah, time's up, I think. Well, I tell you what, that's night. Now I'm going to get me, so this will come out here in the next couple weeks, and we all

know what's going to happen. My phone's going to go like this. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Cool. Well, thanks again. Right on, Sean. Anytime. Hey, folks, thanks again for joining us today.

If you just stumble on the show and like what you hear, please click subscribe. Remember, every Monday and Wednesday a new guest will be sitting down. to share their story. The Sean Newman podcast is available for free on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, and wherever else you find your podcast fix. Until next time.