Shaun Newman Podcast - Ep. 147 - Clint Malarchuk

Episode Date: January 27, 2021

Former NHL goalie who had his jugular cut by a skate blade (awful), who then years later shot himself (awful) & now goes around the world spreading his message about OCD, anxiety, depression & post traumatic stress disorder.  Let me know what you think Text me! 587-217-8500

Hi, this is Brandon Holby. Hey, this is Tanner, the Bulldozer Bozer. Hi, this is Brian Burke from Toronto, Ontario. This is Daryl Sutterin. Hello, everyone. I'm Carlyagro from SportsNet Central. This is Jay On Right. This is Quick Dick, quick, tick coming to you from Tough Moose, Saskatchew. Hey, everybody, my name is Theo Fleary.

This is Kelly Rudy. This is Corey Krause. This is Wade Redden. This is Jordan Tutu. My name is Jim Patterson. Hey, it's Ron McLean, Hockeynet in Canada, and Rogers' hometown hockey, and welcome to the Sean Newman podcast. Welcome to the podcast, folks.

Happy Hump Day. Hope everybody's doing well out there. First off, Tom Freaking Brady is unstoppable. Back to another Super Bowl at 43 years of age. Like, the guy is just incredible. And, well, I'm a Tom Brady fan. I certainly hope he wins one more. And I know there's going to be a ton of Tom haters out there.

Hate on, folks. I love it. Until Tom Brady retires, man. The guy is just pure class. And here's a funny side note. Anybody out there realize he was drafted by the Montreal Expos? He was a left-handed batting catcher with power. And from what it says, he was drafted in the 18th round of the 1995 MLB draft.

There you go. Could have been a Montreal Expo. Just saying, he's probably going to win another Super Bowl. That's where my head's at. We got a great one on top. free today. Now before we get to today's episode though, let's get on to a different type of tap. First sponsor here, Three Trees Tap and Kitchen. They're working in collaboration with Kinsman and the Kinnets. They're doing a telemarical steak night. The Kinsman will be cooking steaks

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If you're heading into any of these businesses, make sure you let them know. You heard about them on the podcast. And if you're interested in advertising on the show, visit Sean Newman Podcast.com, top right corner, send me an email, and I'll get back to you, all right? Now, let's get on to this T-Barr-1, Tale of the Tape. Originally from Grand Prairie, Alberta.

He was drafted by the Quebec Nordiques in the fourth round, 74th overall in the 1981 NHL entry draft. He spent five seasons between the Nordiques and their farm team the Fredericks and the Fredericton Express. He would also go on to play with the Washington Capitals and the Buffalo Sabres. Over his NHL career, he played in 338

games, with a 3.47 goals against average and an 885 save percentage. On March 22nd, 1988, a skate blade cut his neck open, slicing his jugular vein. It was only by the quick actions of the trainer Jim Pizzetti that he survived. On October 6, 2008, he shot himself in the head.

This man does not hide behind the dark problems he has faced in regards to anxiety, OCD, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder. Now, he travels around the world as a mental health advocate. I'm talking about Clint Malarchuk. So buckle up. Here we go. Hi, folks. This is former NHL goaltender, Clint Malarchuk.

Welcome to the Sean Newman podcast. Well, welcome to the Sean Newman podcast today. I'm joined by Clint Malar Chuk. So first, thanks for hopping on with me. Oh, I'm glad I could. I was working and ended up working later in usual, kind of an emergency situation. And I just walked in the door and sat down and boom, there you are.

Well, it's, you know, you got to love technology. It's certainly come an awful long way since you were a kid, heck, since I was a kid. And the fact that we can do this and it feel relatively comfortable, you know, like talking to a screen, being able to see the other person. It certainly opened up the world for all of us, including, you know, us too sitting here today. Yeah.

Are we audio and visual or just we're both? You bet you. They're going to be able to see your pretty face. Well, I should have shaved then. You should have put a tooth in. Yeah, that's right. You know, I got to give a shout to Ken Staniforth. He's a guy here in Lloyd Minster, runs a fountain tire.

And my podcast is coming up on two years of me doing this. And he said, here's a guy you should check out. And I'll be very clear, Clint. I was born in 86. So your career was, you know, you were well past by the time I was, you know, early enough to remember. But as TSN or Sports Center or anything like that, I think everyone's probably seen the skate. but when I get given your book, it was probably eight months ago now. And I read probably the first two chapters and I went, I don't know if I can, I don't know if I can handle this book.

Like it was, it was pretty, it was right at the start of COVID. And I was just like, I don't know if I'm ready for this. And then I finally got up to gumption and picked it back up. And man, it just doesn't relent. You got a hell of a story. Well, I think part of it was, if I'm going to, to do something like, you know, go big or go home attitude. And it's a raw book, definitely raw. I didn't hold back. I really don't know how to hold back. And the editing was very, very little.

You know, pretty much what I put down or said to the guy that co-wrote it with me, we didn't change much at all. I tried to take a few of the F-bombs out. But it adds to it. I mean, like, you just you get this sense of like hold on it's going to be a ride here for you know like once i picked it back up again i don't think i put it back down actually i know i didn't i just like i was at like page 30 and i was kind of like all right we'll pick it back up and then it was just you know like five straight hours or whatever it was of just okay well i can't put it down now because i don't know what's happened next because you you know most movies you watch they got you got you got you know they got this climax and then like the happy ending that just seems to and everything rides off

in the sunset and it just it was a it was a tough read and I was hoping that you know on the podcast here we could talk a little bit about it um and and some of your journey uh starting off of maybe your childhood I was fascinated by your uncles I think it was your uncle's place the old rotting school bus um and just share some stories of Grand Prairie because I mean Grand Prairie although a few hours from where I'm at. I think most people in this area have certainly played hockey there or other sports and have been through Grand Prairie. Well, you know, Grand Prairie, when I grew up there, it was very small. It really, it's really exploded. You know, Procter and Gamble came in. And of course, oil and gas. And, you know, the, I don't even think there was one, there was one traffic light

when I was a kid there. So it was definitely small time, small town, ranching farming, community. There was some oil going on. But yeah, I grew up, you know, I worked on a ranch, a cousin's ranch, and my other cousin, his dad, my uncle was a farmer, and he had an old gutted school bus that we go out and live in there. And it was pretty, it was pretty, rugged for sure. I mean, and he was a character. So a lot of the people up there that I grew up with were real characters. I guess that environment, farming, ranching and rednecks develops a character in people. But I played most of my minor hockey in Edmonton.

And that's where, you know, I kind of started to excel at, you know, mid-teenage. And I played junior in Fort Saskatchewan. And that's when I thought, maybe I, you know, can do this as a, you know, make the NHL. Of course, it's always been a dream. But then maybe you start thinking of it as a reality. and played a couple of years in Portland in the WHL with the Winter Hawks and drafted by Quebec,

which was definitely, it was a culture. I'll say this, though, if we can rewind back to when you're a kid, from what I've read of the book and everything else, listening to a couple podcasts where you talk, you were a pretty driven kid. Like, the story about picking cans to get your first set of skates and buying them off of Ken Hitchcock of all people. I don't know, maybe I'm wrong.

I just don't know a whole lot of kids that would do that. Well, I was, you know, backing up, I guess. You know, my dad, God bless him, he's a great guy, but he was a kind of an abusive alcoholic and it's a progressive disease. And it got pretty ugly at home. And I developed a lot of anxiety, probably because of that, you know, and definitely had undiagnostic. diagnosed obsessive compulsive disorder. And, you know, I just wanted to be a hockey player. And we didn't

have a lot of money after dad left. So yeah, I'd go pick up pop bottles and pop cans and that at the construction sites. I'd ride my bike out there. And then when my mom would come home, we'd get in the car and go and put them all the trunk big, a whole bunch of garbage bags. I've made a lot of money doing that. And that's how I bought my equipment to my skates. And ironically, yeah, Ken, Hitchcock, who worked at United Cycle. And Ken was great. You know, I was just a kid. And he kind of knew we didn't have a lot of money. So he'd get me the best pair of secondhand skates or pads or gloves or, you know, whatever I needed. And, you know, he took care of me as a kid. He really did. And I'm still in touch with Ken. I coached with him in Columbus.

So, you know, we've known each other, you know, ever since I was a little boy. And, you know, funny how through you go through life and certain people that have a, you develop a respect for, especially as you get older and you look back and go, you know what, they kind of took care of me. And Kim was one of those guys. And I really appreciate it to this day. Like I said, I just talked to him last week on the phone. And yeah, you know, the childhood trauma that I had definitely, I think, put it this way, I had some real, real struggles, especially with depression and anxiety and the OCD, but, and it would wane at times and other times that'd be really strong. And the thing is, I really believe that I made it to the NHL because of that

OCD, because I was very repetitious. And I was doing workouts when I was 12 years old when, you know, kids are outside playing. And I'd always say, no, I've got to do 100 pushups and 100 situps and run up and down the stairs and, you know, do a little workout before I go out and play with the kids and Usually when we play, it was ball hockey or street hockey. In the winter, we were on the ice in the outdoor rinks. So, yeah, it was a, it was a funny time as a kid looking back. You know, there was definitely some issues going on with me. I was once hospitalized for two months with severe anxiety.

And back then, they really didn't know what to do with me. They sent me home after two months and told my mom, good luck. You got a real anxious kid there. And, you know, I was very sensitive. things bothered me a lot and of course that OCD funneled all that emotion into just working hard to be a hockey player and you know fortunately it paid off it was later on in life where it became a big issue and became out of control you know I had a decent decent NHL career and then in 1989 playing for the Buffalo Sabres I cut my Jaguarivine and almost died and Sean a lot of people when I tell this story, I always emphasize the trauma, even though at the time I didn't realize any of that stuff, but I prepared for death. I mean, I got up off the ice, skated off the ice because I didn't want my mom to watch me die on TV, watching the game. And, you know, I called one trainer to hold my hand because I was preparing for death.

And I told another trainer to call my mom, tell her I love her. So, you know, basically I'm emphasizing that I was, you know, preparing for death. And that's when my life really changed. I got through that season. I came back in 10 days. So ultimately in upstate New York, Buffalo area, I became a hero. I epitomized everything they loved in an athlete in Buffalo, you know, hardworking, gritty, no talent. And, and, and, and, you know, I, I, I just, they're love and support and my dream.

got me through that rest of that season. It was the next season where things had kind of died down and that adrenaline had worn off. And that's when I started to really struggle. The OCD, which of course I had as a kid, but it was all undiagnosed, the anxiety, depression, panic attacks. But Sean, I started having nightmares. And they were real. They weren't a bad dream. They were reliving that traumatic event.

So it got to a point where I didn't want to fall asleep. but I needed to sleep. So I'd sit in a chair, like a hard chair, and kind of nod off like you do on an airplane. But I wouldn't go into a REM sleep, therefore avoiding the nightmare. And it was about 10 days of no sleep or very, very little. Now I'm sleep deprived. I'm going to practice. My eyes are burning red from lack of sleep.

And we had a Super Bowl party at our captain, Pat LaFontaine's house. And, you know, all that that I was going through. And no one knew what I was going through. because I was this hero in Buffalo that came back and was playing. And at the party, I didn't stay long. You know, I'm tired. And I go home and I had some painkillers because I had a fractured thumb. And we played with those things back then.

And I wasn't really taken to the painkillers much, but I read the bottle, do not drink with alcohol. We'll make you drowsy. So I thought, damn, I'm going to take a few extra and get real drowsy. then I drained a bottle of scotch. Well, my heart stopped. And obviously they rushed me, the hospital I was revived. And that's where next day the psychiatrist was asking me all these questions.

They thought it might have been a suicide attempt. And it wasn't. It was sleep deprivation, a stupid thing, and everything that I've been going through. And so I told the psychiatrist, you know, about the nightmares, about the panic attacks. The OCD was so bad, it was hard for me to leave the house for practice. And so I got diagnosed with, you know, these mental disorders. And that was a journey of about two, two and a half years of different doctors, specialists, medications.

And they even put me on a drug called Haldol. And Haldol is usually for schizophrenia. It's highly sedative, which might be good for some people, but not an NHL goalie trying to stop a hundred mile an hour slap shot. I was basically, you know, sedated playing. And my play was suffering. and I got sent to the minors. And it was in the minors, devastated as I was,

it was a blessing in disguise because my first game, I led in six goals and four goals on six shots and the first period, and I was pulled. And, you know, four goals and six shots in the miners, I was a mess. And I sat on the bench for the rest of the game with a towel over my head and just cried. I was sobbing.

I couldn't even play in the minors yet. Hockey was becoming more of a distant, Yeah, I was devastated and being in the mind. But I had all these other issues that were bigger, you know, there were life issues compared to hockey issues. And that's where I got down or got into the leading specialist in obsessive compulsive disorder. And that's where my journey picked up.

Life turned around. I got on some really good medication. I resumed my career. After that, I was coaching. and, you know, for about 14 years, I did really, really good. And then things got messy again. I was on this. When you coach, you're a player and you got in pro hockey, you got a team doctor and you need a refill in a prescription.

You just say, yeah, I need this refilled it. I take it for my OCD or whatever. And over time, doing that, my body was getting immune. And the drug wasn't not working on me anymore. And I didn't know, you know, it was gradual, I'm sure. And the decline was worse than I had ever been. You know, the depression came back, the anxiety, the panic attacks, and nightmares. It all came back.

And, you know, that was a really, really tough time. And, you know, I had gone 20 years with undiagnosed PTSD. No one, you know, I was never diagnosed with PTSD from the accident. And that's when I went behind the barn and I was shooting my 22 and my wife came home and said, what are you, she could tell. I've been, you know, crying, I was sweating, it was hot out. And I'd been drinking on a binge. And something, Sean, people need to know is there's a huge correlation between self-medicating,

like with me, it was beer and mental illness. and the problem is because it works. And it, but it's not a good way to medicate. Like, because, you know, what two beers would do if I'm depressed, it would make me happy. Anxious would calm me down. OCD tendencies, it would calm my mind. So then it's two beers, then it's four beers, and it's eight beers, and it's 12 beers. I was drinking like 25 beers a day just to get through a day.

And mind you, that was American beer, and I'm Canadian, so you cut that in half. And so that's when my wife came home and she said, what is going on? I said, I just can't stop my head. And I put the gun under my chin and pulled the trigger. And amazingly, a thick skull or like a goalie would have, the bullet got lodged in my skull. It didn't, I didn't lose consciousness or anything. And now they're trying to get me on a light flight, a helicopter. And I'm like, no way.

I'm getting, because I've done my own stitches before and things like, I'll be fine. I'll stitch up the hole. But you shot yourself in the head. I know, exactly. But this is the craziness and the paranoia that I had. And I'm like, this helicopter might crash. Here I got a bullet my head. And the paramedics were saying, sir, you got a bullet in your skull or in your brain.

We don't know. And it may move and you may die. And I'm like, I'll be fine. And I went in. I finally, they sedated me and caught me. on the helicopter and one of my friends says you better give him a luck you don't want this animal waking up in the middle of the air he'll rip that helicopter apart because he was he was a dear friend colleague he was a veterinarian and he really knew my struggles and was trying to help me and he knew

how crazy I was getting and you know lack of a better word crazy I mean I absolutely thought I was crazy at that time. And, you know, the paranoia, you know, all these things that were going on. Well, anyways, I was in the hospital and, you know, they put me in a coma for a couple weeks. And once I healed physically, I went to a treatment facility to treat my disorders. And now I'm a full-blown alcoholic, right? So it's a dual diagnosis center where they deal with mental illness and self-medication or addiction. And I was in there for six months. Now, I don't know how smart you are, but I figured out that's half a year of my life. And that's a long time.

I was the longest standing citizen in there. People come in for a month or maybe two and that'd be it. And I was there six months, you know, Thanksgiving, Christmas, I missed all that. But I got well. I just want to chime in here for a second because when I was reading that and I kept reading how your brain was thinking like on how much time it was all my brain kept thinking was man but you give them give them three months give them six months you get your life back right but i didn't look at it that way couldn't see it that way no the first two months i was i was an angry person very very

angry and mean and um i i i have that push through attitude right and i just thought you know what i made a mistake i won't drink anymore and get my meds right and i'll be fine. I don't need six months in here. So the first two months were almost like a waste of time, but looking back, I guess I wouldn't because I had to go through that anger and that denial. And, you know, it was part of the process, I guess, for me. So that's why the first two months, it was, they didn't know what to do with me, I think, half the time, because I was very, very angry. I grew, I grew a great big beard and, you know, I just, I didn't shower. You know, I just was, get me out of here.

And, but eventually I did get out. And that's when now I've almost died three times, a jugger vein, an accidental overdose. And a bullet to the head. Pull it to the head, right? Yeah. And so that's when I got the idea of writing a book. And I thought, you know what? There's people that probably need to hear my story because now I'm in a good place.

And I think, well, people did in that dark living in silence place. maybe you can get something from my story. And I wanted feedback on my book. I wanted to know if it was good or bad or people liked, you know. And in fact, before the book came out and people asked me, was writing the book therapeutic? No, it was hell. And it was hard.

It was opening up old wounds and that I've worked on for six months and more. And so that was really tough. But with my email being in the book, the feedback that I got Sean was unbelievable. Like every day I was getting 20 or 30 emails because the book was just out. And a week before the book came out, I was like, oh my God. I was so afraid because as you know, I threw everything out there. I didn't hold back.

And I thought, maybe I shouldn't have said that. Maybe I should, you know, not everybody needs to know everything. And but once the book came out and I was getting this feedback, I went, oh my God, there is a lot of Clint Millard sucks out there. I didn't know that so many people struggled. People were saying, you're like a twin to me, thanking me because what I put in words and in print, they had been feeling for maybe years. But because of the stigma, we suffer in silence. And, you know, I know people say, well, I'm going to go get help now. You made it okay.

And yes, being a former NHL goaltiner and coach helps because it gives you a platform. And I guess they're like, well, if he can be honest and do that, I can go out there and get help. And I was getting this kind of feedback. And, you know, for me, I knew that I was sick. I knew I had problems. And with that guilt and shame of being mentally ill and the stigma, it's like, well, I know other people struggle, but they're not as sick as me. They're not as dark as me. They're not as crazy or just as ill as me with paranoia and all the things that went along with it. And writing the book,

I found out, yeah, there's a lot of people out there that struggle. But yeah, they're just as sick as I was. So that really changed my life. You know, I got into public speaking and loved that. Now that part is therapeutic for me to talk to an audience and, you know, I talk to corporations, schools, universities, a lot of military bases that I've been to. In fact, I just did a Zoom yesterday with a military group about the PTSD that I went through and that so many of them doing, people should realize, and I use this example because of the stigma, people think it's a weakness of mental illness. And it's not. It's a sickness. And, and, uh, it's a sickness. And, and, uh, It's like the doctor, when I got sent to the miners, that finally helped me for 14 years on a good medication.

He explained it to me like no other doctor had. He said, Clint, what you have is a chemical imbalance of the brain. I was like, yeah, no shit, I'm a goalie. And he goes, well, your brain doesn't produce enough serotonin, which is a feel-good chemical. And he says, like a diabetic doesn't produce enough insulin. So they need insulin. He says, what's the difference? Different organ.

And that's when I went and I realized that it's a sickness and not a weakness and getting back to the military. To me, they're the most toughest men and women to do that job mentally. They've got to be tough to do that job. And yet, you know, here in the States where I live now, it was as high as 22 suicides a day just from Afghanistan and Iraq veterans. they're trained like athletes you know push through no pain no gain all that and they get PTSD from all the horror they see over there and experience and they come back and they're struggling and they're struggling in silence because of the the guilt and shame that goes with the stigma and they self-medicate and die by suicide and that's why I love doing the military I love going to

the bases and they seem to relate to me and my story and I've become friends. I do a lot with wounded voyeurs and I've become friends with a lot of, in fact, they've come to my ranch here, some of them and we've done some equine therapy and, you know, and so they know my story and I hear theirs and, you know, we bond, you know, over an illness. And but I think the point people have to realize it, that it is a. sickness. It's not a weakness and it can be cured. That was a lot. You're stuck for words now. And by the way, you read the book and, you know, took you all that. I put pictures in there for guys like you. I struggled with the fact that nobody could,

you know, when you when you read your point of view on it, I just screamed like, how did nobody notice? Like how did nobody notice that this was going on? Because listeners should note that while a lot of this is going on, you're either playing in the NHL, playing in the IHL, coaching in the NHL, it wasn't like you were just sitting in, you know, some cutoff village with nobody around. Like you were doing a full-time job at this. Well, we become excellent actors. I mean, great actors. It's amazing how inside in your stomach and in your head, you're struggling, but you're able to somehow. go to work and function.

And then as soon as you're done and you're by yourself, it just floods back in. But we're very good actors. I always tell people I'm like Bradley Cooper, except I'm better looking. And it's, we do. We become great actors. We can hide it.

And at least most of us can. And I spent my career hiding it. We did a reunion in Buffalo last year. and I was talking to Rick Vive and he was getting ready to write his book and that and he goes Clint I read your book and he goes I played with you in Buffalo I had no idea the only thing that I thought was a little strange was for a goal you'd spend four or five hours in the gym after practice and that was my OCD right yeah yeah and he and I said yeah Rick, we're great actors. We hide it when we have to.

Yeah, it's, it's, well, that stuck out to me, that line, you have a line in the book where you talk about just being able to hide it. And I just, you know, there's a lot of smart people around you, like really smart people. And after the first time, Clint, it comes out that, you know, you've had some, you know, you've been diagnosed and you got medication, everything else. I don't know. I just seemed to me like I was like, but in saying that, I got one of the things that made me pick the book back up again was COVID's really, you know, with the lockdowns here in Alberta currently, we're not allowed to have anyone in our private residence, right? That's been difficult on people, that social aspect. And I've had people close to me open up about OCD and struggle. And it's become very evident that a lot of people are having difficulties. And maybe this seclusion is really starting to spur it on more and more and more. Well, it's a seclusion, but it's also the stressors that go with COVID.

Like people like my public speaking has been shut down since COVID started. There's no conventions. There's no big gatherings. So financially, I'm taking a hit hard. And that's my main income. Yeah, I got my horse business. but my main income is the public speaking. And so there's a lot of people that are losing their jobs, layoffs, losing businesses.

And so there's those stressors too, not just the seclusion. Yes, that's a big part of it. But the stressors that this is bringing on, and a lot of people have never experienced anxiety to a great degree or maybe even depression, really. you know, we all know kind of what it's like, but now people are experiencing, you know, big anxiety for the first time and uncertainties and stress and depression and uncertain futures. And so I don't want to call those people mentally ill, but there's certainly an emotional distress. And that can be a taste of mental illness of the depression and anxiety at least. Well, I'll sit on this side and I'll be a, I can safely say that.

when I read your book or others that have, you know, people have gone through some really, um, difficult times. I count myself fortunate because I didn't play to the NHL by any stretch the imagination, but I played, you know, for 26 years of my life. That's, that's what I did. I played hockey. I played, um, all over the world. I lived with different people and I never had a bad family. I, I just seemed to hit like the, the lottery card, so to speak. Everywhere I went, I was surrounded by good people that always had, for the most part, the best for what, you know, they wanted the best for you. And then you start digging into some stories on hockey and, man, there are some tough ones where you go, I don't know if I always just assume there was more

like me than like Clint. And then as you go along, you find out, there's quite a few Clint's Quite a few people that they got the raw end of the deal. Well, yeah, we're hearing stories more and more. Athletes are becoming more public articles in the Players Tribune and things like that. And, you know, I kind of like to think that I was a bit of a pioneer as far as the mental health part goes. I think Theo Fleury was, you know, before me, but his was more on addiction and mine's more on the mental illness thing. but yes, he, you know, had the childhood trauma while teen trauma of, you know, what went on with him.

And that's another thing that, you know, and I talk to a lot of doctors and I go to these conventions and a big part of what happens to people is their childhood. Their childhood trauma. Yeah, they make it through. And it comes out later. Like with me, it took a traumatic life, life and death experience for it to really explode. right? But yeah, that childhood trauma and a lot, so many people can relate to, you know, child abuse, childhood. It doesn't always have to be, you know, sexual or anything like that. Just an alcoholic

parent or two or, you know, addiction issues of any kind. And the kids grow up in that. And it doesn't always affect them right away. It's down the road where it ends up festering and comes out. And, you know, a lot, I know a lot of mental illness comes out in people with their late 20s, early 30s. So, you know, talking to all these doctors and psychiatrists, I've learned a lot on, you know, what people go through and how it manifests in their lives. And yeah, certainly our childhoods is huge. Another guy that comes to mind, you mentioned Theo Flurry. Jordan Tutu's been on the podcast, and he's another guy who's opened up about some of his

struggles and and just how it, you know, I don't know, festered is the right word, but that's kind of what it, it. We've had a lot of suicides. We've had, you know, several suicides in the last 10 years or so and overdoses. And overdoses to me, sometimes there, is it a suicide or is it not? Or are they just taking that, that addiction because they don't care anymore? I don't care if I wake up, you know, so. And, you know, Jordan Tutu lost his brother to suicide.

Yeah. You know, so yeah, he's lived it. And he's come out public and he's doing some things to help people. And, you know, and that's the great thing, I think, with most of us. You know, I talk to Corey Hirsch quite a bit and some other guys. And it seems if we can get through it and survive it, we end up being advocates. and passionate. Well, and that's where I kind of wanted to go is, you know,

you mentioned going through rehab and working on some things. What are you doing? Because you've mentioned relapse, right? Like you've mentioned where you've, you know, something spurred on, post-traumatic, and it just sends you a reeling again. What are you doing now to make sure that doesn't happen again? Well, I, and that's a great question. And, you know, when I do my public speaking, I obviously tell my story.

but then people want to know, okay, well, how do you get, how do you functioning today and how did you get to functioning this way today? And, you know, I've got a few things that I share. You know, definitely I take my medication and I check in with my doctor. Okay. I've learned to meditate. When I get squirly, I need to take a time out. In fact, I heard this one time said, if you're having a bad day, you've lost your connection with your higher power. You're God, whoever it might be. And that's kind of true because when I start spinning, I think I'm in control of everything. And I'm not. So I take a time out, get calmed down, and kind of let God take care of. And I come back and go, well, I guess you took care of that. God doesn't seem to bother me anymore. And it's still there. The problem might be big, but it doesn't bother me anymore because we can only control

the things that we can control. I work out every day, the endorphin release. And I'd say one of the biggest things is being of service. and that's what's hard when I'm not out speaking, but I do, I've been doing a lot of podcasts and being a service, like I mentioned, I did one with the military yesterday.

And so I'm still trying to be of service because it makes me feel good. And it makes me really feel good when I get the feedback where people go, whoa, I guess I can do what you're doing. And so being a service is huge for me. It is. Helping people. Yeah, yeah,

helping people. Honestly, getting people, like I've had people say, you know, tell me that they, they were suicidal. They were thinking about suicide until they either heard me speak or read my book. And for me, that gratification, it's like a high. I, you know, I feel we talk about purpose. And my purpose, I always thought was to be an NHL goalie, dreamed of it. And then I was lucky. Then I got the coach in the NHEL. So I had a parallel line of somewhat success. I thought that was my purpose. but I always had these demons, you know, this parallel line coming along with me and, you know,

all the things, you know, depression, anxiety, you know, as a kid, all these things. There was times I'd be in the NHL going, why am I depressed? I've got the world by the tail, but I didn't know about chemicals and the brain and, you know, depression and how it worked. But, you know, that is why I say now I know my purpose. it wasn't to play in the NHL. Yeah, that gives me a platform. Helps me with my speaking and obviously my book.

But why did I go through all that crap to be where I'm in today? So one parallel, the other parallel, and it comes to a peak. I know what my purpose is. Now it took me 50 years to figure it out. But I have a saying that our purpose in life is to figure out our purpose. I was just going to say, man, you had to go through a lot of shit. We're not going to call it crap. We're going to call it shit to find your purpose.

Like, I mean, I think a lot of people search for that, what their purpose in life is. Yeah, I think so. That's a big question to wrestle with. Yeah, I think so. Purpose, what's the word? Self-love, security in yourself. A lot of people struggle with insecurity. And a lot of times on the outward side, they're the most secure.

You probably played with guys that were very cocky. And then you find out about them and everything. You find out, no, it's a cover up of their insecurities. And that is very, very common with the athletes. Because, you know, as a kid, this is kind of sick thinking. If I had a, and I still have to work on self-love. but and it's probably from my childhood my dad but if i had a good game as a kid i was a good kid i was you know i was something if i had a bad game i was i was it wasn't a bad game i was a

shitty person and that's where all my self-worth that's the word i guess i was looking for self-worth yeah purpose self-worth you know when when you speak in hockey terms like that it's something i got three little kids and i'm gonna i'm definitely uh the oldest is just starting to get into hockey, like just learning how to skate. And I have to remind myself all the time that I just want them to have fun, right? Just go out and have some fun. We got to, there's hard work and there's other things that go into it for sure. But at the end of the day, when you say, you know, if you had a good game, wow, that was great.

You can, you feed off that energy. No different than if you. you had a poor game, hell, we've already all been there as goaltenders. I'm sure you're even more in tune with that than the rest of us because you're the single guy. When you have a bad game, you're already in a low, right? Like to get dumped on even more must have been, wow. I think it's just any hockey player, any sports athlete understands that like immediately.

Yeah. I read something Kelly Rudy wrote. he's a former goaltender. Everybody probably knows who he is, a hockey night in Canada. And he said one of the longest skate is when you're a goaltender and you get pulled from a game

is from skating from the net to the bench and it's a long, miserable skate. It's a terrible feeling. Because basically you're, you failed. And everybody sees that. And oh, you're no good. We're putting somebody else in.

And obviously, it's not always a bad game by the goalie. Sometimes the team just blitzes a team and the goalie had no chance. But, you know, that's how we feel. We take it to heart. Yeah, it, well, there's another guy, right? Like in Kelly's book, he talks about dealing with exactly what, you know, depression, anxiety. And he's, you know, playing on a team with Gretzky and just like all the, it goes back to

what you said. I'm sitting in the NHL. Why am I depressed about this, right? That's a real conundrum the brain works on that you can't bring together. Like that's a hard So would you, would you probably agree with me that these professional athletes that are very insecure, but outwardly you would never know it. But I wonder if it's because

they put so much stock in their game, you know, in being in the NHL or the NFL or whatever. That's their dream. That's what they work for. And that's who they become instead of, that's just the job they do. That's not who they are. And I think a lot of athletes struggle with that.

I would say, I would agree with you, but I would take it one step further. And I would say that I can't speak for women. I can speak for majority of men, I think, when I say that we don't want to look at ourselves as unsuccessful. So it doesn't matter for a whole.

hockey player or cowboy just in business in general you want to you want to be successful being successful as a is a confidence thing you kind of walk around and so you mentioned several times I think in in your stories that you know you didn't want to get help because help meant failure and you didn't want that right that means you're less and people are going to look at you like you're less well I certainly get that like when I read that I'm like now that makes sense to me that makes sense. I mean, you need to get help, but at the same time, admitting you need to get help is, is, you know, that I can't fix it on my own. And then people are going to portray that as a I get that. And saying that as a guy watching, I've had friends, right, going, I don't think

anybody's going to, I think it's pretty, I think it's pretty manly to stand up and be like, I need help. Like, yeah, oh, okay. Vulnerable. Right. Yeah, but, you know, society, it and the way we're brought up as men is pretty much what you described. So, you know, success is a big thing. And, you know, even to the point where you become your job, rather, it's just something you do for a living. You're good at it. But it doesn't define you as a person.

And yet, playing in the NHL, I can see how that would be really hard because, especially in Canadian markets, which you've got to feel. I mean, Buffalo might as well. I mean, right, they're pretty much Canada. Like all those markets, I feel, you know, when you watch the NHL, when COVID first came and the NHL shut down, in Emmington, it was kind of like,

it was kind of nice to have no hockey to talk about for a bit. It was nice to talk about some things that weren't hockey. But the longer COVID dragged on, you went, oh, man, I just need some hockey again to like talk about something that isn't political. isn't COVID, isn't X, Y, Z, and having hockey going again, it certainly is nice. But now you hear it again where, you know, you get like, people forget, I know they're making lots of money.

I know professional athletes make a lot of money. But geez, some of these kids are like 19 years old. Heck, even if they're 25, they're 25 years old, right? And like dealing with the pressures. Yeah. And dealing with all of that. Yeah. Yeah.

And it becomes who they are rather than it's a job. they do. It's not what defines them as a person. And, you know, I really struggled in school as a kid. And I think looking back, it was probably the anxiety that I had hated school. And I wasn't good at it. And when you're not good at something, you usually don't like it. But I was good at hockey as a kid. It's all I wanted to do. But I think I was 38 years old. I was between coaching jobs and I was like, oh my God, hockey's all I know. And I thought, wait a minute, you know horses pretty good. You grew up around them. And so I went to school and became a horse dentist and a horse chiropractor. And I'll tell you what, I struggled in the written. In fact, the last person in the exam in the

exam, working on the animal and that, but written exam, and I was afraid of, you know, hell, I wrote a book and I can barely read. And the last person to pass in their paper, I was still another hour and a half after the last person. So I struggled. But for me to go back to school and get a certificate. I was, it was a big accomplishment for me, you know, especially,

you know, that I struggled so mightily in school and I was very intimidated about going back to school. But I had a passion and it was horses, you know, obviously hockey. But, you know,

I thought, oh, if I'm going to, if I can't coach, what am I going to do? So I went with the horses. You know, I've heard a lot of,

um, NHL guys specifically talk about when they retire. They spent their entire life playing, and now what do you do? But I'm a guy who played Junior A, who played a little Division 3, played the lower levels. And I personally know guys who, when they were done their junior career, not even as far as I went, who just played Junior A for three years. And when they were done at 21, had the same thought, like, well, now what do I do?

Right? Or went on and played college and then what do I do, right? I, when I came home at 26, that's exactly what I thought. I was like, what the hell do you do now? Right? Like, I mean, for all of us lower tier guys, maybe you can get a coaching job, but it certainly doesn't pay much off the hop, right? It's you're in the lower tiers of hockey, which there's nothing wrong with that.

That is, you got to, that definitely separates the guys that were just looking for a paycheck or in it for the love, right? But at the same time, it's a shock no matter when the end comes to any athlete, probably of any sport of just like, well, now what do I do? Because I've been groomed to think that all the life is hockey. And then when it comes to an end, it's like, well, you know, you mentioned horses. Well, and most of those guys, you know, hockey wood was defined them. Yeah. They were a hockey player, period. That's it.

And their passion and love was that's it. I was very fortunate that, you know, I went right from playing into coaching. And, you know, you see a few guys that get that. But, you know, I was very fortunate. And then I coached for, you know, 20 years or whatever. And in the meantime, between, I don't know, a coaching gig, that's when I did my, my, horse dentistry and chiropractic schooling. But yeah, I mean, I was very lucky.

I was fortunate to go right from, you know, one love. They say the next best thing to being a player is being a coach. So I was fortunate to have the career I did. You know, I think I was an average career as a player. And, you know, just to get an opportunity to coach, you know, right away was certainly a blessing. I don't know about average. I won't give you average because I can sit here and say, how many teams are in the NHL in the 80s?

21. So you were one of 40, call it 42, but I mean, if you want to stretch it and bubble it up, I mean, you're like one of 60 goalies roughly who was playing back then. And pretty consistently by the, you know, by the mid part of your career, I don't think that's average, any stretch of the imagination. Well, again, Sean, you're talking to a,

a man that still has to work on self-love, very insecure. And I'm in the spare bedroom right now, and I'm looking at a couple plaques. I'm looking at me with an NHL All-Star jersey. It never really registered because I never thought I was that good. A plaque here, the Dodge NHL performance player of the week. I was player of the week, and I'm going, in the NHL, and I was player of the week many times and player of the month.

and I still didn't get it. I'm going against Gretzky and Lemieux. They should be getting these. It usually did. But it never really, it never really registered until I look back. And I was coaching to it. I'd hockey DB and find out statistics on certain guys that,

man, they had a good run or whatever. And then you look at your numbers and you played more games in the NHL. And so it's slowly sinking in, I guess, that I was okay. I was okay. You know, especially, here's a thought. I wonder how good I could. Kelly Rudy talked to me about this too.

How good could have Clint Malarczak been if he wasn't struggling with all his demons? And sometimes I think about that. And other times I go, yeah, but that OCD, that's what I hang my hat on that, my work ethic. I outworked everybody. And so I never thought I had a lot of skill. And so that's, I always felt like I had to outwork. You know, that what if game is a dangerous, a dangerous game. I, I was going to say, you mentioned going from playing to coaching was a godsend,

was a lifesaver, so to speak. For me, when I came home, I played senior hockey for like nine years in Saskatchewan. Coming from Saskatchewan, that I tell you what, that cured the hockey. but stumbling upon doing this podcast is been as close to a hockey game as I can get. I don't know how to put, but like the nerves, like the energy, it's just, it gives me such a high. And actually, when COVID first started, I was only doing one a week. And when COVID first started, I had, and I was doing them all in person. Well, I mean, you can imagine what happened with COVID and everything else.

And I had the choice of, well, I can figure this out. or I can let it slide and I figured it out and now I'm on to two a week because it just is such a mental game changer for me. Right. And I think like everyone else at the start of COVID, you felt, you felt that fear that, that paralyzing that was happening to not just me, but everybody. And I wish more people could find that, could find something of life. after hockey or life after sports because you got to dig around in it.

And to play the what if game, I always go, what if I would have found this at like 25, right? Like, where could I be if I'd been doing this for 10 years? But then you got to go, yeah, but use the Clint theory. If you hadn't have gone through what you've gone through, it probably wouldn't be as good as it is. Because you weren't the same person as you were when you've experienced some of the things you've gone through. And I look at your story and what you love doing. now is what you say is your purpose is to talk to people and help people. And it's like, well, the only way Clint helps people is if he's got this story to tell. Well, yeah, that's true.

You have to have lived it. And that's kind of what I was saying about that I couldn't be of help and of service. Yes, the NHL gave me a platform. But what I went through gives me something to talk about that I've, you know, dealt with personally. I've been to the deep, dark place. I'm the guy with a gun to the head, you know. So yeah, I see what you're saying and that you're right, that what-if thing is, it's useless to even go there. And, you know, like, I know my OCD is still there. And yes, I'm more in control of it.

I've taken therapy and medication and that, but I still have it. I mean, when COVID started and my public speaking pretty much shut down, I thought, okay, what are you going to do now with your spare time? we didn't know how long it was going to be either. So after a couple months into COVID, I started to look at some other things. And of course, they were, you know, for me, designed to help people.

So I started taking an online course to be a life coach. And then I got that. And then I was like, okay, now I'm an advanced certified life coach. So, you know, and that's all about helping people, you know, as a life coach. I like to call it a success coach or, you know, where I kind of, you know, you've kind of, you know, you kind of pick a niche and I'm in the port probably more on the mental health and wellness

niche of things, people that are struggling with anxiety, depression. And like we discussed, there's a lot now with the COVID. Are you doing that actively then? Yeah, I just started. Yeah. For the listeners, if anybody's listening and wants to work with your, get ahold of you, how do they go about doing that? Um, Mularchuk.com. And, uh, that's my website. And of course, it's mostly focused around, uh,

my speaking and my book and that. But, uh, I think it's done where you can hit coaching or coach and, and, uh, page will come up and you can contact me. I think it's finished now. I have somebody working on it anyways. I think that's super cool for people to be able to interact. And, uh, as a guy who's done, I've done, uh, I think it was life coaching. Geez, I'm trying to think of what I used it as career coaching, career coaching. That's what I'm thinking of because when I first came back, I was working for my dad and my two brothers. And just at the end of the day, it wasn't me, right? Like I just, but I didn't know how to get out of it.

And not, I don't mean working with them. I just mean, like, how do I, like, how do I figure out where to go? Because, I mean, for so long as a hockey player, everything is like straightforward. You're either making the team or you're getting cut. And if you get cut, then you go to the next team and you either make the team or you get cut and you just keep going, right? And then when you're done, it's like, okay, the world's this giant ocean, what do you want to do? And like, you should be, uh, over the moon at the possibilities. But instead, you're kind of like locked by like, I don't know. Like, I don't know. Sometimes it's fear too.

You think of something, yeah, that'd be good. But, oh, gee, I don't know. I'm kind of afraid I might not be good at that or I'm afraid I'll go to school for that and I'll fail or, you know, so, you know, Fear is a, it's a good motivator, but it's also a paralyzing deal too. Yeah. Now, I got to know, I've been sitting here staring at the mass above your head. Yeah. Yeah. You're the first guy I've read, and I'm not going to sit here and say I've read a thousand hockey books,

but I have read enough of them now, where your mom was making your goalie mass in the WHL. Is the one on the far left? Is that any of her work or no? She started in June when I was in midgett, actually. Yeah, those are the first prototypes. You know, they're the stuck to the face ones. And then there's another behind the angel up there, the Christmas Angel, there's another molded one to the face.

And then over here, I think there's one. Yep, there's another one over there. I think that was one of the real finished projects. The others were more like experimenting. Yeah. Yeah. And I've tried to keep one from every team I played for, you know, in the NHL. Yeah. Well, I was laughing. When you're playing in Portland and you're talking about, yeah, and

Mum had made my mask. I was like, kids will just never understand that. Like, I don't understand that. Like, by the time I'm playing, you know, everybody's got the mask of the modern mask, I guess. Yeah. But you were in a time where it was face molded. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And when I turned, when I, when I played in the NHL, I was wearing a Mama made mask. Bull, you were, when you say that again? Yeah, when I, when I turned pro, I, I, I wore a mask that my mom made. So when you're in the NHL, you're wearing, your mother had made the mask. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

She made, she made, I probably wore that mask for, I don't know, six, seven years in the NHL before I, I finally, the team said, we're going to get you new mask and this guy makes them and so yeah. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I think it was, it was it was this one. And I don't know if you can see this or if this is even right. That one right there was when I turned pro. And these other ones were minor hockey and junior. That's a pro made one. That's a Washington pro made. Can you see them? Yeah, you bet, yeah. And that's a saber mask, Buffalo Sabres. That was me in Las Vegas with the, I always,

later on when you get personality, they always had a steer skull on the forehead. For all the listeners, go to YouTube so they can see that. Because that, that's cool. I don't know. It seems like a ton of accessible people in the NHL always seem to be goaltenders. And you guys have, like, when you got designing your mask, right, you went from like this, the stick on one, the form fitted one to like an actual modern day mask.

And you can actually have something painted on it. Do you remember talking to the artist where you like, this is what I want? Yeah. Yeah. I wanted to steer skull. Like, you know, just with that Western theme because of my background. Yeah. You know, personality would come out.

I think it was. Yeah. I don't know. I've got one. They're not all up here because I got another Buffalo one. It's got the steer skull, but then it's got a lariat going around the side too. And that one, it must be still in the boxsters or something. Well, let's talk about coming from Alberta, you know the battle of Alberta a lot.

You get drafted by Quebec. What was getting drafted? like kids today are going to be like, oh, you were in, you know, Montreal and you were getting drafted and the whole big draft day and TSN was there and everything else. Could you maybe lead us through getting drafted by Quebec? Well, you know, it was back in the day. I maybe the first rounders would go to the draft city. But, you know, I was at home.

I was hoping to, I missed the draft the first year. I was eligible at 18. I didn't have a very good year in Portland. I was really homesick and it affected me. Then the next year at 19, I got drafted and I remember answering the phone and it was the GM of the Quebec Nordiques. And so, yeah, that was kind of like. And to be honest with you, I had a little bit of being a westerner and you probably know what I'm talking about with the, yeah. So it's like anywhere but Quebec.

Anywhere but Quebec, yep. But I was actually really fortunate. to go there because it was a hockey mad city. And, and, you know, they just loved their Nordiques. And they didn't have a lot of depth and goal. So my first year, I actually played two NHL games. My first year, pro, usually you play a few, especially as a goal, you play four or five years in the minors. But then you, or in American League usually. And I remember I got called up to Buffalo or to Quebec and we played in Buffalo. And that's my first NHL game. Well, warmups, Jacques Richard, who's a 50 goal score and could really, you know, shoot the puck, he hits me in the head and I had to get stitches. So I missed half a warmup while I'm laying in the table in the trainer's room getting stitches. And Michelle Berger on, our coach comes in. He says, hey, kid, you know play, you know play. And I got, they're stitching my ear. And I said, I'm playing. I am not missing this opportunity. And I remember, it ended up a tie game.

And I got second star. So here, I've arrived. I'm, second star in the NHL. So we're going to go play the Stanley Cup champions, the Islanders the next night. They weren't a good team at all. No, no. Bossie couldn't even skate, right? And so I get the start and we lose the game 10 to 7. And I led in all 10 and I thought, wow.

Well, Billy Smith at the other end led in 7. So it's not that bad. Next day I'm back in the minors. So as you know, as you know, with athletics, it's a roller coaster. One day you're second starring on top of the world. Next day you're getting shelled and you're back in the minors. I got to know, you know, with Quebec not having a team now, I can't even remember the year that they moved. But it was 96, I believe.

Yeah, it was right in that stretch of all the Canadian teams head and south. but Quebec, Montreal, there must have been a rivalry. And that's what I was bringing about with the Battle of Alberta. All we know is Calgary, Amundon, right? And the Battle of Alberta isn't quite the same as what it was back in the 80s, even the early 90s. What was Quebec Montreal like? I was talking to somebody about this the other day, and it was very, very intense. It's not just the teams, the fans.

The media, Montreal versus Quebec media, we're always, you know, japping each other or whatever. And it was very intense. And then, of course, the famous Good Friday brawl, it was Good Friday, and we played, it was a playoff game, and they called Good Friday Massacre. And I was backing up that game, and I got 15 minutes in penalties and got thrown out of the game.

I got that going for me. in a bench clearing brawl? Yeah. And I didn't even play a minute of the game, but I got 15 minutes and penalties and ejected from the game. Now that's hockey. Now that that that's hockey. What was the old, well, actually, I think here's a, I will never experience probably,

well, who knows? Maybe Quebec will get a hockey team here at some point. I hope they do. I hope they do. Oh, it's a great hockey city. What were the fans like there? Because from what you talk about, I assume, or it seemed like it was electric. They were, they were rabid.

They were, I mean, and they, they bled the blue of a Nordique. I mean, they were, they were very, very rabid, like good energy and behind the team rally. But, you know, they loved us. They absolutely loved us there. And that's why I hope they do get a, they obviously have an arena built, a new state-of-the-art arena. And I'd love to see them. It would be a good NHL franchise there. It really would.

Did you know French? No. How did you survive not knowing a lick of French? Well, especially with the Nordiques, they were, most of the team were French-Canadian. And the few English guys, we had the Stasnese who were, you know, from Slovakia. So after certain, like once a week, maybe after practice. they had this this French teacher would come in. And, you know, I knew Pat Price from Out West.

He could, he took French in school. So he could, these guys. So I get called up and I haven't had a French lesson yet. So I go in there for the lesson. And the lady's speaking French and I don't understand a lick of it. And she's going around to each player in class going, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And they do enough to answer back and say, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I didn't have a clue.

She comes to me and she's going blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm looking at Dale Hunter, who is my buddy. I'm looking at Dale going, you know, maybe help me out a little bit here. And they're kind of grinning and smirking. And so the lady kept asking me whatever it was. And finally she snapped and said, what is your address? Where do you live? And I'm like, holy crap.

I'm about two blocks from the rink. I just down there, I could walk. here if I wanted to and she kicked me out. She thought I was toying with her. I didn't know a word. I'm sure you didn't do anything to spur that on. One of the lovely things of the book, it sounds like you're quite the character. You know, when I asked different NHL guys who the biggest characters on the team were, you and Dale Hunter sound like just a pair made in heaven. We were, we, Dale and I were good friends and we were roommates and sellmates and we did everything together and you know he was married and I wasn't at the time but I was always at

his house you know he was a year older so he was a veteran but oh yeah we we we got in trouble all the time I mean we really uh you do what we did today you know you'd be with social media we'd be fried if you did if you did things well call it 15 years ago, Clint, you'd be fried. Right? Like, yeah, you can't go riding horses up and down the golf course, which Dale and I did, you know, and, you know, getting in that kind of trouble. But we, we thought it was harmless, you know.

We weren't golfers. So we thought it was a nice fairway to open this up, open this horse up on. You took, I got, I'm going to have to ask for the listeners. You took horses up and down the fairway? Oh, yeah. I think that story's in my book. Yeah. With the Marshall chasing you.

Well, yeah, that's right. You remember it. So we were kind of on a layover in L.A. and we had a few days. So we did a team out into Palm Springs. And a lot of, I was saying to guys because I'm a cowboy, I'm going, hey, you guys want to go horse. Well, rent horses, go horseback right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, well, they lost our luggage. So guys didn't want to go ride a horse in a suit and tie. And but Dale and I did. We went and got a couple of horses. Well, the luggage got delivered to the resort we were staying at. And it was a golf resort. So we're riding up on this ridge. We look down and boys are all golfing. So Dale and I thought it'd be fun to go down there and steal the pins and joust. And yeah. And the golf, golf marshal was chasing us in a golf cart. And I, I didn't know anything about golf. So I see this, he's got Marshall written on the front of his cart. And I go, Dale, the Marshall's after us. We take off. And I'm shooting at it with my finger like this. And we're just having fun. But yeah,

I don't think they like this riding on the fairway and the green, stealing the pins. I could just imagine all the golfers listen to this cringing as two horses go trotting down the fairway. Well, we did. So when Dale and I returned to the horse rental place, the dude ranch place, which wasn't far,

uh, there was a sheriff waiting there for us. and but fortunately the coach and GM intervened and we they paid the the damages on the golf course and we didn't have to go to jail that day. Dale and I used to joke about, you know, who do you call when you get put in jail? Well, your best friend, Dale said, no, no, he should be sitting right beside you because we always were. I've only ever had one encounter to the drunk tank.

And this is when I was, I think I was 18 and we took one of my best friends to, you know, the bar for his 18th birthday. We ended up in the drunk tank, only time I've ever been there. And I remember I was very, very, very sheepish to go to his parents house. I thought I'd let him all down and whatever, you know, just trying to have a little bit of fun on his 18th birthday. and I remember walking in and I knew it was going to be all right because they posted a thing on the fridge and it said, your best friend should be there to bail you out of jail.

And then the other little angel said, no, he should be sitting right beside you. And I went, okay, well, I guess I guess we'll be okay. Yeah, that was Dale and our motto. That was our model, you know, but we did harmless stuff. I remember one time he got in there was a big, in Edmonton, and it was in the, it was in the off season and it was Klondike days in Edmonton. You know, they have the fair and the carnival and all that. And we were at this big beard gardens and a big fight broke out.

And I remember getting thrown in the paddy wagon. And I look across and there's Troy Murray sitting across played with the Blackhawks. Hey, Troy, what are you doing? Hey, Clint, how are you doing? So we ended up having this great conversation with, you know, 15 guys in a paddy wagon. They're going, who are these two guys? Tell me about going to training camp the first time. You know, I think with the, it feels like a lifetime ago that smoking and drinking and all that.

And training camp kind of being more like a conditioning camp to get guys ready for the season. Was that a culture shock? Or like did you walk in expecting something and then you walk in and there's, you know, it feels like a mensly gockier, so to speak. Well, my first training camp, I remember. I remember, you know, we did fitness testing the first day, which wasn't real excruciating like it is now what they do for fitness testing. And I remember walking into this banquet room where they had bikes set up and, you know, a push-up station. You know, it was very minor stuff.

But I see this guy right in the bike, kind of a heavyset guy, and he's smoking a cigarette. And I don't speak French, and he's speaking French, and everybody's laughing at what he's saying. and I thought it was a trainer because he looked kind of heavy and I thought it was a trainer calibrating the bike for the testing and so I said to somebody he said who's at our training goes no kid that's a moose dupont our captain smoking a cigarette doing the bike test doing the bike test well another time in Quebec we had about four or five guys that smoked back then and they had a smoking area you know between periods they smoke and everything and I remember uh Dan Bouchard was playing.

I think it was an exhibition game. I wasn't dressed that game. And Michelle Plas was the number two guy at the time, goaltender. And so they split the game. So Bouchard comes out at the halfway point and Plas goes in. And the first whistle, the linesman skates to our bench and hands over a lighter

and a pack of cigarettes that Michelle Plas used to keep in his pad. So when the period was over, he'd just go right to the spot this moment. The games changed a bit. Games changes the slight bit. A fun story about your mom was that you would, there used to be a phone on the bench and you'd call her from that. Yeah, that was in Buffalo.

And way before, you know, cell phones and that. And not way before, but they weren't out yet. Anyways, yeah, there was a phone. And if you weren't playing, as a goal, you're sitting there right by the wall. And I see this phone. And it was a phone they used for the, because the locker room wasn't like right behind the bench. It was, you had to go a different way to get to the locker room.

So they could, trainers could call each other. Hey, Joe needs a stick or, you know, but we need more tape or whatever. And I said, can you dial out on that? And this guy goes, yeah. I say, can I call my mom? And yeah, well, the game was on and I got the phone. Hey, mom, she goes, what are you doing? I'm watching the game.

How are you on the phone? I said, we got a phone on the bench. I can just imagine the commentator's going, oh, Malar Chuck's on the phone again. Yeah, probably homesick calling his mom. Well, I've appreciated you hopping on here. I don't want to take up much more of your day. We do a little fun little thing at the end where it's the Crude Master Final 5. A shout out to Heath and Tracy McDonald, supporters of the podcast since the very beginning.

Just five quick questions, Clint, long or short as we want to go. There's no timeline on it. The first one I always asked is if you could sit down with somebody like me, like I'm doing to you, so to speak, and pick between their ears and get at, you know, their journey, their lessons learned, et cetera, who would be the guy you'd want? To talk to? Yeah. The headmaster at the dental school that I went to, the guy he founded the school.

He was just a really knowledgeable guy, not just in the horse industry, but in life lessons. A real fatherly type guy. That's a guy that I would love to spend more time with. His name was Dale Jeffries. And a real mentor then? Oh, absolutely. I mean, he got me a second career. You know, he, he tutored me, he encouraged me.

I mean, horse dentistry is not easy. and it can be very frustrating when you're trying to learn. I mean, first of all, you're grinding on a horse's teeth and the horse might not like it. So you've got to deal with that too. As I always find it, you know, when I ask this question, you know, it's always interesting the people people pick, right? Like, you know, for somebody, it's somebody famous for another, you know, God or Jesus comes up. And for you, it's just obviously somebody who's impacted your life. Yeah. Well, you got to understand too, you know, I struggled in school and as a kid and everything. And he saw my age going to school again. And he, he helped me. He definitely helped me. He was like more of a private tutor, you know, after class. He helped me out and I had questions. But he also saw my passion. You know, I was the guy hanging out asking questions, say, hey, you know that one horse we were looking at. And, you know, so he, he, he, he helped me out.

he liked that, I guess. If you could pick one goalie today, you had a career as a goalie coach, that you could work with, though, in the NHL today, who would you want? Oh, boy, that's, that's all, there's a, there's so many of them that they're so good. You know, I know Carrie Price a little bit like I've met him, and, and we've had lunch together. He's just such a super guy as well as a great goaltender. that, you know, because of that relationship, I'd probably go with him.

I will say that I absolutely love working with Miko Kippersov. He was hilarious. You had to get his trust first. You know, a funny thing about him, when he first came over from Finland, him and another goaltender, Johann Hedberg, they were playing together in Kentucky, the farm team for San Jose. And Johan told me the story that for two years that they played there, the coach didn't know that Kipper could speak English.

because Kipper played that game. He said, I don't want to talk to the coach. So he always pretended he couldn't speak English. He's a character, a really, really funny guy. And of all, I'm not a flames fan. I'm going to say that. I'm a diehard Euler fan. But of all the flames, Jerome McGill is right up there,

Lanny McDonald, and Miko Kippersoff was phenomenal to watch. Yeah. He was talented. Yeah. Well, I watch Heaventon, too, being a northern Alberta kid. You know, I kind of, you know, and that McDavid and Dry Sightal and, you know, God, they just so dynamic and, and they're a fun team to watch. And they're not far away, you know, from turning things really around. I know they're what, one and three right now.

Yeah, one and three to start. Not all the Oilers fans are loving life right now, but. Yeah, yeah. But one thing about being an oiler fan, I mean, you might not win every game, but boy, you're entertained by that McDavid and Drysidal. Oh, yeah. there's very few players when they step on the ice you're like I know what they're going to do because he can make something out of nothing awfully quick well his speed he just blows by guys and I can't imagine being a defenseman we're seeing him coming you're probably going oh man he's going to go

what it it's that fear of being embarrassed right yeah you know speaking of fear of being embarrassed if you had, who would you rather take, Grexky or Lemieux coming down on you? Well, I always tell people, you know, being from Alberta and that and then playing in Edmonton against the Oilers, you know, it was a big deal. You know, it was a big deal. And I always tell people that Gretsky wasn't very good.

He was not that good until he started playing against me and I got him all his confidence. But Lemieux, are you talking about a breakaway? Hmm. I guess. Break away, Lemieux. I would not. He had such an incredible reach that he could deke you, you know, with those long arms, long stick,

and put the puck around you almost with effortlessly. Plus he could snite, too. I mean, he liked on breakways, he liked to go high glove, but it was high glove bar down. I would love, if I could go back and watch those guys in their heyday, that'd be fun. I mean, you can still do it. I mean, you know, you can watch. the classics and you can watch it, but like to actually be in the building and see that. Because now I've had the opportunity to go watch McDavid and his, well, I've got to watch

quite a few superstars in their heyday. And it's like in the building and seeing it on ice, man, that's special. Yeah. If you could compete in one event at the Calgary Stampede, what would you take? Saddlebron. Saddlebron. Saddlebron? Yeah. That's your event. Well, Saddle Brank Bearback, but Saddle Brunk is a real skill and an art. Bearback is more of a hang on and muscle through. So Saddle Brunk is the traditional event of rodeo. Have you ever done an event at a rodeo before? Yeah.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. In fact, I was playing for Washington. And they had to, I was at the stampede. and there's a picture on the front page of the Calgary Herald of me flying through the air. And, you know, back then they didn't have the internet. So I thought, well, you know, Washington's never going to play. Nobody will ever know.

Well, there's a thing called American Press or whatever it's called AP. I get a call from my mom, no cell phone. So she called the rodeo office. And so I got a message called David Poyle. of the GM of the capitals. And he was not happy that I was, you know, rodeo in. And I,

I, of course, said, no, that wasn't me. That was my brother Garth. That's a misprint. Didn't buy it. No.

Your final one, if you were boxing, you're walking into the ring. I know you got a little boxing background. You trained, that kind of thing. If you could walk into a, Well, no, actually, any song for your walk-in music, what would it be?

Oh, my heroes have always been cowboy. It's a little mellow, a little slow, but, you know, Willie Nelson, he, yeah, there's a few others. I'd have to think on that. But yeah, my heroes have always been cowboys. Fair. That'll, that'll bring back. Yeah, absolutely, yeah. Okay.

It's a little, it's a little mellow for, you know, a boxing event, but it would stir me. Hey, I mean, if you walked out and knocked a guy out, it would become a hit immediately, right? Like, I mean, what happens with, I just think of any winning team, they can have the most absurd song for their wins, but if they're winning, it catches on because that's what winning does. Well, that just triggers the thought of when Chicago was rolling through to the cup, that one song they played every time they scored. Chelsea's dagger.

Is that what it did? I don't know what it's called, but it's a catchy tune. It's a catchy tune. Yeah. Or when the St. Louis Blues won the cup and they had, I'm forgetting the song right now, but that became a huge hit, right? And it was just the song played in the dressing room, I think, if the story's correct, or at the bar and then it transferred over to the dressing room because they started winning.

Buffalo Sabres, they've used this song, whenever they come on the ice before the game, before the periods and all that. It's called Saber Dance. and, you know, it's an instrumental, but it's a jazzy little tune, and it's saber dance. On a side note, I hadn't really thought about this till now. Does the name Skip Craig mean anything to you? Yeah, yeah. Skip's been on the podcast.

Skip is here in Lloyd, and as soon as you, I don't know why it's taking this long to spur that thought on, but he played on the inaugural Buffalo Sabres team. He's got a set of original sabers on his wall. Yeah. Yeah. So he's back in Lloyd. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, he's been here for off and on since the, I think since the 80s. I was out in Washington, D.C. I do a lot with the wounded warriors. And we put on these hockey tournaments for these wounded warriors. And we have a couple in D.C. And my old goalie coach from Buffalo, Mitch Korn, was the goalie coach in in uh in uh Washington and so I called Mitch up I said hey uh you know I'm I'm in town we want you know can we get together so he set up a lunch with um me my wife was there

uh Mitch um PR guy I think was there and uh grew Bauer and Lloyd boy Holtby okay yeah yeah and they were both class acts really nice guys yeah Yeah, well, Braden's, I mean, it's hard to, like, he is a, he is a super nice guy. Yeah. Yeah. I noticed his tattoo, I think it was on his forearm or maybe anyways. It's a, it's a, the province of Alberta and the province of Saskatchewan and a star or something on the line, which is Lloyd Minister. Yeah, well, we're Canada's border city.

Yeah. And he, so asked him, I said, is that Alberta? I see it. You know, I didn't quite, because Saskatchewan's not, doesn't have the mountain jagged. And he goes, yeah, and he showed it to me. And we were talking tattoos because I'm not a tattoo guy, but I did get one for, but it's actually quite interesting. I don't know if you can see it or not.

So I've almost died three times. It looks like an EKG, right? Yeah. I like the Native American and Native history. So I made an arrow. But the semicolon, if you ever look up the semicolon project, it's a suicide awareness prevention project from a gal that the semicolon represents it, I guess, in a sentence, it's used as a stop or a continue. And our kind of motto is with suicide, you know, don't do it, continue. That pause continued.

So that's what the semicolon project means. and the gal that started it. Unfortunately, she succumbed to suicide. I don't know, probably 10 years after she started this project. But it was very popular. A lot of people get little semicolins, you know, right here or something. That's a really cool story. I didn't know that.

I'm a really cool guy. Well, Clint, I appreciate you hopping on with me. This has been a ton of fun. Oh, it has. It's one of the funest ones I've done. Thank you. Hey, folks. Thanks for joining us today.

If you just stumbled on the show, please click subscribe. Then scroll to the bottom and rate and leave a review. I promise it helps. Remember, every Monday and Wednesday, we will have a new guest sitting down to share their story. The Sean Newman podcast is available for free on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, and wherever else you get your podcast fix. Until next time.

Hey, for all you keeners waiting for the bloopers. Keep waiting. It was a perfect day. Good old hump day. I hope everybody enjoyed the episode. I shout out to Mitchell Detiliers. Hope I said that right. He shot me a message and said, Love the galley episode today.

Made my dark drive to and from work a little less miserable. Keep killing it, Sean. So a shout out to all you listeners who are still listening, and if you're the champ, get your feet up off the desk. Go back to work, would you? All right. We'll see you guys next week.