Sheikh Uthman Hadi - How to Be a True Man: A Guide for Men to Become Leaders of Their Family and Ummah

Episode Date: April 11, 2026

Today, we gather to discuss a topic that is of utmost importance in our lives as Muslim men: how to be a true man. In a world filled with challenges, uncertainties, and rapid changes, it is essential for us to understand our roles as leaders within our families and the broader Ummah. We will explore how to deal with depression and anxiety, how to earn the love of Allah, manage stress, achieve financial stability through entrepreneurship, and most importantly, how to teach our children to grow into righteous individuals who will carry forward the values of Islam.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/sheikh-uthman-hadi--6689369/support.https://sheikhuthmanhadi.beam.lyhttps://open.spotify.com/user/315hadqmwxllibu6ubi5us2cbn2y?si=572b4d8898284e9ehttps://open.spotify.com/show/3MQHfrpjj3XXcqoPbN5Dl8?si=v6YQ42kpSx-VONBFhT3CzA

Bismillah, the Rahman and Rahim, alhemna, and al-a-a-a-Rasulah, and Salatu al-Rasulilah, and on Hishālih, and Aishabi, Ajamai, Ais and Sestan. Al-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-auqqaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa men. And that is how to be a true man, especially in a world that is filled with challenges, uncertainties, and rapid changes. And it's very essential. I want to go over the essentials on how to understand our roles as leaders within our family and the broader sense, this Ummma.

Because a good man is one who can uplift his family, uplift himself, and uplift this umma. I've actually said it backwards, uplift himself, uplift his family and uplift this umma, inshallah,za'ad. And, yeah, I want to also. explore how men and Muslim men can deal with depression and anxiety, how to earn the love of Allah subhpana, manage stress, achieve financial stability through entrepreneurship, and most importantly how to teach the next generation for our children to grow into righteous individuals who will carry forward the values of this beautiful religion of Islam. Now the first thing I want to mention is understanding leadership in Islam. And I want to start off

with an ayah from the Quran in which Allah Suu'u'u'u'u'a says, men are the protectors and maintainers of women. So in this ayah, Allah, Allah, Sufana Hu'uita emphasizes our duties to provide not only material, but also emotional and spiritual support and also emotional and spiritual stability within the lives of our families. And also the promise of Allah al-a-a-hu-salam also exemplified the qualities of a true leader, which are compassion, justice, and humility.

And as men, we are called to lead our families with those same qualities. So in order to actually be an effective leader, you have to lead by example. You can't be the one following. Oh, the family is doing this. Let me just follow them. You have to be the one to lead by example. I'd say it's a bad thing if the family is doing a good habit or if they're doing these things. But you should always be the one to try and lead to the best of your ability in any way that is pleasing to Allah, supranahua.

And also in a way that's not going to harm yourself nor the family. And this is something else that I want to mention as well, because our actions should reflect the teachings of Islam. Something that you know is pleasing to Allah, Supanahua Tala, is our actions. When the Prophet Allah al-a-a-Heu-Salam said that the actions are judged by intention. Every person will have that of what he has intended. So your actions are important, but your intentions also as well. It's very important as well. So whatever your intention is, you're going to be rewarded for that.

So it's not just the action. Just you saying, oh, you know, I'm doing this to please the family. I'm doing this to help the family. Your intention should be for the sake of Allah Sufana'u'u'adallah, and it should be to build a closer relationship with Allah supranahahahahahah. And when it comes to following the teachings and, you know, following the teachings of Islam and how our action should reflect that, that actually means being honest, it means being just, and it means being kind in all of our dealings. Whether that is with our family, whether that is with our brothers and sisters, you know, in our own communities, whether that is with our umma, whether that is online, whether that's in physical presence. or that's usually you doing a negotiation between two different people. Maybe it's a conversation.

You should always be just, honest, and kind, and many other characteristics, and exemplify the characteristics of the promise of Allah, Allah, A. He wassalim, in all of your dealings. And especially when your family, when it comes to your families. And this is also something that's very important as well, because if you're trying to lead by example, you have to lead by those things. You're not going to tell your family, hey, make sure you do this. make sure you do that, make sure you do that and you're not doing those same things, right?

So make sure you're trying your absolute hardest to also adopt those things that you're doing as well. Because when a family sees that you are embodying those traits, then they are most likely to adopt them, right? So if you're adopting them and then you're teaching them, then most likely, inshallah, they will adopt them and then they'll continue them on. Now the second thing I want to mention is dealing with depression and anxiety. And in this, you know, dunya, and in the time in age that we are in now, many men struggle with mental health issues such as depression and anxiety. And it is crucial to recognize that seeking help is not a weakness, but rather a step towards strength. And the Prophet of Allah al-a-a-Hu-Salam taught us the importance of community and support when he told us to surround yourself with righteous company who is going to uplift you and remind you of Allah, Samana, or what's a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a. So ensure that you're also remembering Allah and you're trying your absolute hardest

to surround yourself with company that's going to help uplift you, not bring you down. You're surrounding yourself with company that's going to help you in the remembrance of Allah that's going to help you gain closeness to Allah. And when it comes to this point, if you are struggling with depression, if you are struggling with anxiety, try to remember Allah, Sufana hua'u T'a more as it helps. And also engaging in your rsada. And Allah, Sufana, who is speaks about this in the sa'a. He speaks about this in the Quran and he comes to the remembrance of Allah.

When it comes to remembering Allah, he says, verily in the remembrance of Allah, do hearts find rest? So many brothers and sisters, when you establish a routine of sara and vicar, it significantly alleviates those feelings of anxiety and depression. So just to give you, you know, a little bit of advice as well, do not hesitate to seek professional need or professional help if that's needed. Because mental health is just as important as physical health and addressing it, addressing it can lead to more of a fulfilling life and more of fulfilling life in worshiping Allah, Supperanahua-a-a-a-a-da. And sometimes when you have this depression, sometimes when you have this sadness, it can actually be a means of you're not having a close relationship with Allah-Supon-Hu-Ta-a-a-a-a-a-a- So one of the things I encourage us all to do is build

a relationship with Allah-Supon-a-u-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a, as well as trying your absolute hardest to still keep the relationship that you have with others. And when it comes to trying to earn the love of Allah supranahua this is another beautiful point I want to make here. You have to strive to have the characteristics that Allah Sufano Huta a lot loves. Patience, gratitude,

and all these other things that Allah supranahuata loves and all the characteristics that he loves. And the promise of Allah a Allah aubu-Salam said the most beloved of people to Allah Allah are those who are most beneficial to others. So if you want to be loved by Allah, you have to remember that

Allah Sufana Hu'u'u's Allah loves those who are most beneficial to others. Those who are going to help others, those who are going to uplift others, those who are going to benefit others. Ensuring that you are engaging in kindness, in charity, and service to others is very important

and not only strengthening your relationship with Allah supranahua huaata but also enhancing your standing within your family, your community, and overall, inshallah is unla. And we should also strive to perform our daily acts of ibada, with sincerity and devotion,

regularly reciting the Quran, engaging in voluntary prayers such as your sunnhas or engaging, you know, in your an waffil or engaging in prayers that are going to bring you closeness to Allah Supperahua T'a'a'a and also giving in charity. These are all ways to earn Allah Sufana Hu Tala's love and earn the pleasure of Allah saanahu Tala.

And also remember that Allah saupanohu Tala loves those who strive to improve themselves and seek his pleasure. Now, I want to mention the fourth thing This is something that is an inevitable part of our lives that we all are going to face at some point and that is stress. But how we respond to it defines our achlac and it defines our character, which is why the Prophetus Allah al-a-Hewis-Salam faced image challenges, right? But how did he react to it? How did he respond to it? And that right there defined his character and his e-ch-lach.

He responded to it with steadfastness and composure. He remained steadfast and composed in those moments. And one of the most effective ways to manage stress is actually through prayer and supplication and patience, which is why Allah, Supperahua'u-Talāsa'anaheim, And so Allaheufanae'u ta'a'a'a'a. Seek help, your patience and prayer. So Allah, Sufana'u'u'a-ta-a-a-a-ta is telling us that if you truly want that help, seek help with that patience through closeness to me. because like the Prophet of Allah a Hewsalam also mentioned, but like the Prophet of Allah Himself also mentioned

that the close of the servant comes to His Lord is when he is prostrating in that Salah. So Salah is also a means of bringing closeness to Allah. So Allah, Suhpano huta'u ta'a is saying, if you truly want help, then come to me, come to me, and you will find relief in that. And this also brings me to another hadith in which the Prophet of Allah al-Aa-u-u-Slam said

that prayer is the key to relief. So make it a habit, many brothers and sisters, to turn to Allah in times of distress, seeking his guidance and his support. And when you practice mindfulness and self-care, that also helps to alleviate stress, engaging in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. And like we've spoken about before, it's nothing wrong with joy and relaxation and, you know, enjoying the pleasure of this dunya as long as it's pleasing to Allah, and as long as you're using your time to please Allah and you're using your time to be effective and to help others.

But also remember that you're allowed to. to do these activities, right? Whether that is reading, whether that's exercising, whether that's spending time with your loved ones, maybe even some people, it's playing a video game, maybe some people it's watching a TV show or something, and we've spoken about this before as well in our re-invent yourself as Ramadan event of trying your absolute hardest to remember if you're watching something that is going to bring you away from Allah supanahua'u'u'a'u'a then you probably want to stop that but that which brings you closer to Allah continue it right and don't stop it so my brothers and sisters I give us

this reminder here of trying your absolute hardest to find things that are going to bring you joy and a lot of people as well sometimes say that sometimes maybe taking you know a bath maybe soaking helps helps you know with that or maybe just relaxing maybe sitting down maybe breathing taping some breaths maybe meditation helps whatever it is that helps you, find that which relaxes your stress and also try your absolute hardest to seek help with that stress as well if you are feeling the stress and to alleviate it and ensure that you also have a community that is going to help significantly with you that is going to uplift you if you are feeling those types of ways.

The fifth thing I want to mention is achieving financial stability, which is very crucial for fulfilling our responsibilities as leaders of our families. and Allah supranahua-ta aida has encouraged us in the beautiful religion of Islam to pursue entrepreneurship and lawful earnings. And the province of Allah-a-Hew-Slam said this in another authentic hadith in which he said, the most beloved of earnings to Allah-Supano-ho-ta-a-a-a-a-a-a is the work of a man's hand. So you actually working and you actually doing it is something that Allah-Supano-a-hu-ta-ta-la loves. And in order for you to actually become successful and to become a successful in your entrepreneurship, you have to first start off by identifying your skills and your passions seeking in and training in those certain fields and training in that which is going to help guide you to that which is going to be beneficial to this umma like i said because looking at the bigger picture of you're trying to ultimately better yourself and then your family and then your community and then this umma inshallah as well and try to find mentors and try to find people who you know are going to help guide you to that

which is right and they're going to help guide you in that craft because one of the things that you want to do as a true Muslim man is you want to find that which is going to help benefit this umma and which is going to help benefit overall the world and which is going to help benefit inshallah not only just everyone in this world but mainly yourself as well and be hereafter so this is why my brothers and sisters i do give us a reminder to invest all your money in something to invest all your time all your life as much as you love to do one passionate thing. You're so passionate about it. If it's something that's going to help better this, omma, don't just keep it for yourself and don't just, you know, not

share it at all. Share it with the world. Share it so that we can all better our, you know, you can better the lives of everyone, including, you know, inshallah, in the hereafter for yourself as well. One of the other things I want to mention when it comes to your financial stability is setting a clear plan for it. Budgeting, saving money, not spending it on, things that are excessive, just continuously buying, and also investing wisely are very key components of that financial stability. Sorry if I keep stuttering here, as well as try to consider starting small. Perhaps with a side business. It doesn't have to be something that's big. It doesn't have to be something that you're going to quit your job that you may be working in now and say, you know what,

forget it, I'm not going to work that anymore. I'm just going to start a business and then it doesn't really work out well as you wanted it to. And then now you're like, oh man, I just quit the only means of financial stability I might have had a little bit as well. So this is something else, my brothers and sisters that you can do. And trying your absolute hardest to gradually expand as you continue to gain experience and confidence with that business or with whatever that thing is. And the final thing I want to mention here is one of the most important things when it comes to your family, and that is teaching your children about Islam, raising this next generation.

So teaching your children the values of Islam is one of the most significant, responsive. that you have as a Muslim man or Muslim women as well. So one of the most effective things I'll mention is trying your absolute hardest to model Islamic values for your children. Demonstrate the values of honesty, kindness, and respect in your daily lives with those who are around you. And, inshallah, they'll follow the same suit and they'll do the same. And they will also show honesty and they'll show kindness and they'll show respect in their

daily lives and they'll treat others with compassion. And also teach them knowledge, teach them ill. Some people say that, you know, it's the best if you just let the children learn on their own. But out here in the day and age, we have so many things that target Islam and so many websites and so many sites and so many videos that you can find on YouTube that are targeting Islam. Oh, you know, if your child doesn't pray, you need to beat them. Or if you do this, you know, if you do this, there's so many things that are targeting us as believers. And for young kids, they're trying to soak up that knowledge and they're trying to learn. make sure you're also helping them and you're guiding them as well.

Be careful. Don't go to this and don't go to that. Only use trusted things, only go to this. These are certain things that you can teach your children as well. And children are naturally curious and it comes to asking questions about Islam and about life. Teach them. If they ask the question, teach them. Don't force it upon them. And if they're still young right now at this very age, maybe they're from the age of,

you know, maybe I say one to five, then just slowly teach them how to pray, slowly teach them how to make Wudu. If they might miss some parts in there will do, that's fine. If they might not pray the whole prayer completely, that's fine. Continue establishing it. Every time they pray Salah with you, say, al-Hahmda, good job. You pray Salad. Because now it helps better their relationship with Allah, al-Safana Khawaitala, because now they feel as if this is something that's good.

I'm doing something that's good. Okay, let me continue to do it. So the more you do this, it also helps. And also try your absolute hardest to engage in discussions, like I mentioned, just a second to go with them when it comes to the questions that they may have. Engage in discussions, teach them, tell them how to, teach them how to understand certain little things, read to them about Islam, read Islamic books, teach your children yourself, not with the TV and not with your phone or not with the iPad and not with the laptop, all these different things, and especially not with YouTube.

Teach your children yourself from what you know and if you do not know, then seek knowledge and teach them from what you do know, that which is pleasing to Allah, Sufana, and when I mentioned engaging in Quranic recitation or you're trying to teach them a bit of Quran as well, make it a habit to read Quran together as a family, because when they see this, it becomes a habit that they want to keep up, and now, no matter what you do, they're like, no, we're not going to stop this, I want to continue reading Quran, I want to read Quran with everybody. And when you start to see the child say, hey, it's time to read, isn't it? It's time to read. That lets you know that, inshallah, you have done good to implement that in their lives where now they know the Quran is one that they need to read.

It's one that's going to help them. And try to teach them short little stories that they're going to be able to understand of, you know, the Sahaba, you know, read Allah, Wahan Himu Jashmai, and the prophets, peace be upon them all, and the companions, you know, of the Prophet of Allah, Hew islam, the very close companions of him, and even the Prophet of Allah al-a-a-Hu-Slam himself, tried to teach them little stories and things that are going to help them. And my brothers and sisters, the final thing I will mention is trying to, to involve them in community. Take them to Islamic events.

Take them to the masajid. Take them out and trying to show them what the massad actually is. Explain to them in a nice way and a kind way. This is the massadid. This is where we pray. This is where we worship. You worship Allah,

Supperu'u'u'u'adah here. You know, you do certain things here. And that also will help develop a sense of belonging and responsibility towards this Ummah. And we ask Allah, to make it easy upon us all. So many brothers and sisters,

If I were to give a conclusion of what we spoke about here today for these 18 minutes, how to be a true man is not always about having true, but it's not always about having muscles. It's not always about being the fittest. It's not always about having the deepest voice. It's not always about who has this much money and who has that much money. Sometimes it's about how you can benefit your families, how you can benefit this umma, your communities, and how you ultimately can benefit this umma. And also, my brothers and sisters,

Try your absolute hardest to follow the sunnah and the Quran. That's all you need to follow. Do not follow any person off of YouTube who's telling you this is the best way to do it. You need to follow this and you need to do this. And every single day you need to have this shake and you need to drink this. Okay, it's not going to work. Okay, because yes, it will make you feel a certain way. Oh, I feel great.

I am very built and I have this and I have that. But work on your connections first, not only just with humans and not only just with your family and with the community but also with your relationship with Allah subhpanao'u'u-ta-a-a-da. So my brothers and sisters, we ask Allah, to grant us the ability

to teach our children, to grant us the ability to guide us to become righteous leaders among our families, among the community, and among our omma. And we ask Allah, to forgive us for our sins and our showcomings and grant us his special mercy

not only in this life remaining the next. Jazakum al-Qa-Qa-Qa-haerr, my brothers and sisters for listening. Inshall, I'll see you again soon. Warachar and al-Iu'an, and al-handole-il-lliae-grab-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-