Sherlock & Co. - The Blanched Soldier - Part Two

Episode Date: June 24, 2025

THE GHOST IN THE MANOR - We promptly managed to summon the story from our latest client 'Doddy'. It was that of an old army friend, Freddie Emsworth. So ghastly and eerie was his tale that we headed i...mmediately to Bedfordshire and to Tuxbury Park; Home of the Emsworths... for a spot of Ghosthunting. Part 2 of 2 This episode contains swearing, horror, sexual references, drug references, drug abuse, distress, references to violence. Listener discretion is advised. or merchandise and transcripts go to: www.sherlockandco.co.uk For ad-free, early access to adventures in full go to www.patreon.com/sherlockandco o get in touch via email: docjwatsonmd@gmail.com Follow me @DocJWatsonMD on twitter and BlueSky, or sherlockandcopod on TikTok, instagram and YouTube.  This podcast is property of Goalhanger Podcasts. Copyright 2025. SHERLOCK AND CO. Based on the works of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle Paul Waggott as Dr. John Watson Harry Attwell as Sherlock Holmes Marta da Silva as Mariana Ametxazurra Michael Lyle as Doddy Adam Jarrell as Freddie Emsworth Joel Emery as Colonel Emsworth Written by Joel Emery Directed by Adam Jarrell Editing and Sound Design by Holy Smokes Audio Produced by Neil Fearn and Jon Gill Executive Producer Tony Pastor Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 The following is a fourth wall break from Sherlock and Co. Hello there, I'm Joel Emery, I write Sherlock and Co and I'm here to tell our American-based listeners or perhaps even North American-based, the continent, that is, not like just northern US states like Montana or North Dakota. Anyway, there's a Sherlock and Co event in Los Angeles on Saturday August 2nd. I've even said the date the way around that you like it there. Saturday August 2nd 2025 in Los Angeles California. Myself and the show's director, producer and he plays Stanford as well of course, Adam Jarrell will be there for what I'm sure is going to be an afternoon of great fun.
Starting point is 00:00:42 This event is kindly put together by fans. There are a limited number of tickets so go to sherlockandco.co.uk forward slash events and you will see the link there with all the details. That's sherlockandco.co.uk forward slash events. Good luck and I hope to see you there. Come join the Patreon! It's a huge community now, with loads of extra cool stuff. Patreon.com forward slash Sherlock and co previously on Sherlock and co right done enough what you are in charge I told you yes and I told you your new host ladies and gentlemen I can't help be a little... distracted. By what?
Starting point is 00:01:47 That gentleman over there. His name tag. The end is... occluded by that good job sticker. But from what I can see... it reads... James M. Oh. And he has found it increasingly difficult to not stare in our direction. Why is it that you wish to speak to Sherlock James?
Starting point is 00:02:11 He's actually that one I was going to speak to. John Boy Watson. Oh yeah? Yeah. This is yours isn't it? Err yeah. Yeah that's a GoPro I had while I was out in Crayne. You know him? There? It's... Yeah, yeah, don't tell me... Emsworth, Freddie Emsworth. Boom! Yes, mate, yes!
Starting point is 00:02:40 Yeah, no, he was cool actually. A bit downbeat, but him and the three American guys we were with were just about the only ones that knew how to handle themselves. Marine, right? He's a Royal Marine? Is. Was. Yeah, sure. Is he dead?
Starting point is 00:02:58 Did he die out in Ukraine, did he? I don't know. You OK? Have you spoken to him recently? James! James! Let him go! James! I fucking seen him! I fucking seen him mate right? His face at the window mate!
Starting point is 00:03:11 He was fucking at the window! Okay James, James, just breathe! His face! James! His face! James! James! James!
Starting point is 00:03:19 James! James! James! James! James! James! James! James His face! James! James? Hello there and welcome back to the Case of the Blanched Soldier.
Starting point is 00:03:34 I am Sherlock Holmes and this is part 2 of 2. Do the things. Email John. Join the Patreon and do the social media silly little stuff. Follow him, Doc J Watson MD or Sherlock and Copod. Okay. This is the episode now. Bye. We sit.
Starting point is 00:04:03 Like statues. Chipped into a hardened pose by the tension of it, the unease, the disconcert. We had witnessed Sergeant James M. Dodd lose all sense of himself at the school. We had witnessed a man's mind collapse in on itself, his screams ricocheting off 30-foot high walls of lacquered plywood. And now we find ourselves in his home in Tooting, a neighborhood of South London that estate agents have optimistically described as up and coming for the past half a century, sandwiched between its high-achieving cousins
Starting point is 00:04:43 Wandsworth Clapham and Wimbledon. The home of Sergeant James M Dodd is grand and ornate on its exterior, but the interior is hollowed out with the trappings of 21st century design, light greys with blackened accents, dark blues washed and blanched with featureless veneer-like whites. The artworks are all too bold, too dazzling. They leap off the walls and demand attention. Sherlock? Yes? That's enough narration for now, I think. I'm setting the scene. I realize that, but I can hear John coming. He's probably got James with him and you are criticizing
Starting point is 00:05:20 the guy's home. I was observing his home. I wasn't criticizing. Mm-hmm. Anything other than, oh you have a beautiful home, is received as criticism. Is it really? It is. Even honest feedback. Hey. Hey. How's he doing? Yeah, good. Well, no, sorry, not good. But, uh, not screaming anymore, so... Result? Sure. Where is he? Just making teas. Oh, he doesn't have to do that. We can do that. Why did you make him do that? I didn't make him do that. He wanted to.
Starting point is 00:05:55 And what of his friend, the Blanched Soldier? Um... Yeah, he hasn't opened up much further on that, but he's going to. What's blanched? Oh, like broccoli. Broccoli? You know, like the quick boil. No, blanched.
Starting point is 00:06:12 A wash in white. You've already used that word. Yes, in my narration, but you did interject and thus rendered it unusable. Okay, what does it mean, blanched? It means whitened, paled, shocked into losing all colour. Right, that's what he said the guy's face was. At the window. Yes, our supposed missing soldier Emsworth. Shh, he's coming.
Starting point is 00:06:35 Usually, when I do a tea run, he has a bit more sugar going on, let me tell you. What's that for the scaffolders, is it? Yeah, nice of them to see the boss taking care of them all from time to time. Here you are. Thank you, James. Thank you. It's a lot. I think maybe this is just how I'm sort of... processing it.
Starting point is 00:07:06 If you know what I mean. This would be a good time for an ad read. For better health. Better help and shush. Just for like... I dunno, but I haven't talked to anyone about it, you see. You believe Freddie Emsworth to be dead. Yet you saw him.
Starting point is 00:07:23 Yeah. Do you want to start from the beginning? Sure. Erm, yeah, so I was a bit of a shit at school and that. Stabbing peers, yep. Of course. Yeah. Got worse for a bit in that sort of area. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:46 Erm... I eventually thought I'd give the army a go. Couple of mates, the only sort of blokes I'd really connected with had joined up so I thought I'd... Yeah. Give it a whirl. And no word of a lie, literally, day one, hour one, loved it. Yeah. Adored it. Yeah adored it completely like
Starting point is 00:08:07 The energy of it mixed with the pride of the old thing serving England and that then you got the lads You got the challenges the structure. It's It was all I wanted all I needed I just Took off needed. I just, BOSH, took off. Best of the best, you know. And the only fella close to matching me was Freddie Emsworth. He'd had a leave of transfer because he'd trained as a Marine, initially. So I'd say to him, he was cheating sort of thing. He knew all the tricks of the trade. I was going in fresh and still kicking his ass but yeah. Cracking bloke was Emmers.
Starting point is 00:08:49 Just top lad. We were joined at the IP honestly. We couldn't get enough of each other. Like in all seriousness now, the way he made me laugh man, honest to god. There were times I thought I was going gonna pass out or throw up or shit myself or something I was laughing so much good yeah I'm just thinking how to sum it up yeah wouldn't want to be accused of dragging things out. Hey Sherlock. Yeah this was 10 years ago now of course and he uh yeah he'd never really mentioned his dad like
Starting point is 00:09:33 but one day he was like the old man wants me out didn't act like it was a definite thing like it was a punch or something and then suddenly, whoosh, yeah, he was gone. We kept in touch and that but, weird, think he was struggling with something, couldn't tell you what, mind. He, like me, would do a bit of the old self-medication. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I know someone like that. The years rattled on. Tough ones and all.
Starting point is 00:10:09 Yeah. And it started to lose its shine a bit. Like Emma's. Like anyone, really. People start to age out of it. Also people are so bleeding materialistic these days. They all swan off like him to be estate agents and sales reps and all this. All this commission stuff posted on Instagram that they get up at 4am and drink a protein
Starting point is 00:10:31 shake. Who gives a fuck mate? Honestly, go back to bed and do us all a favour. Yeah, no, so I had a look at me old man's business, scaffolding. Always kind of went back to it whenever I had these in-between bits of my life. He just did a job at a time, my dad, with a couple of old mates.
Starting point is 00:10:52 They were half drunk and knackered most of the time. I said I'd take it over for a bit and just expanded and expanded and I was, cool, blimey, mate. Honestly, the whole business just blew up and I was a made man you know made man and I found that getting old army mates in various roles and jobs that was actually a decent way of doing things strong lads polite punctual graual, graphed as all this.
Starting point is 00:11:26 So I thought I'd reach out to Freddie, to Emma's, and I found him on LinkedIn. He was doing something in sales. Not posted much, really. I thought, lovely stuff. He's probably sick of it. I messaged him, checked in, no reply. Tried him a couple of weeks weeks later and get a DM back.
Starting point is 00:11:46 Hmm. What did it say? Let me load it up here. Er, yeah. Here it is. Hello James. Thank you for reaching out to our son Freddie. He recently volunteered in Ukraine and unfortunately he did not come back. We are immensely proud of his contribution in the fight for freedom. When was that? Last January now. 80 months ago I'd say.
Starting point is 00:12:16 Right. So, um, how did you see him? You said you saw his face. God, yeah, the company got bigger and I set up a subsidiary company that would go for big commercial jobs rather than just your houses in the local areas. We'd go for these proper big contracts and eventually, three weeks ago actually, I get a request from Tuxbury Park in Bedfordshire. Okay, is that, what is that? It's a manor house with a hotel, spa sort of thing.
Starting point is 00:12:53 There's tons of them these days. But anyway, you get the job through one of these heritage property protection funds sort of thing. So they don't know me from any other scaffolder. I take the nice motor up there, not one of the vans, nothing like like that and I get shown the works that need doing by this older fella Ralph. Ralph? He's nice enough shows me the bits and bobs all facade repair stuff so scaffold bottom to top all this yeah and
Starting point is 00:13:18 I go oh I'll drop you an email with the quote and what have you he goes I remember the sentence he said, he went, the resident, the colonel doesn't get to choose the provider due to their heritage trust. I'm thinking what's his name? The Kentucky chicken fella? Sanders. Yeah. He goes, no. Emsworth. I go, that's funny Ralph. I used to know a captain Emsworth. I says to him, I go, that's funny Ralph, I used to know a Captain Emsworth. I says to him, I go, his name was Freddie Emsworth. God rest him. I look at him, yeah, and the minute I say it, I think, ah bollocks. He knows him, he's related to him or something.
Starting point is 00:13:59 You can tell, he won't meet my eye, he's shifting about, his voice is going. Sure enough, it's his uncle. The whole house is Colonel Emsworth's, Freddy's dad. I never knew he was military, you see. I chewed Ralph's ear off about Freddy, my god, did I bang on? I just wanted him to know what a proper laugh his nephew was. You don't see that side of a man, do you? Unless you're mates.
Starting point is 00:14:23 Anyway, I ping the quota over a couple of days later and I whack off 20% in memory of Emma's. We land the job with the trust, of course we do, they've always go set up, I go check up on it last week, lovely evening, gets quite dark there with those big mature trees blocking out the sunset, plus we draped it, the scaffold in this big white tarp and I'm up on the second story scaffold walking the planks right and I can see inside the windows because like I say it's dark out here a kind of glance because I don't want to be nosy but I thought I'd catch a glimmer of something at one of them. Or someone. And something inside me is going,
Starting point is 00:15:10 have another look Doddy, have another peek pal. That daft voice in my head has got me enough trouble, I don't know why I still listen to him but I do. I double back on myself, head to that same window and just... Bang! His face! I swear to you, I'm not one of those ghosty people, all that haunting, ouija-bouija-bored crap.
Starting point is 00:15:34 Not me, right? But he is fucking there! Captain Freddy Emsworth! The late Captain Freddy Emsworth! The man's face is there, at the window. Maybe emotionally you were still processing and your mind conjured the image of his face. Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 00:15:54 He's back on your mind, you're at his family home. You haven't had time to process it, like Marianna says. You were so busy with your business. I took a picture. Oh. There. Well, goodness. Oh. There. Well, goodness. Oh my god.
Starting point is 00:16:08 Yeah. And he just stood there and let you take it? It was like he was staring right through me, like a zombie. His skin. I know. In the flesh, it was honest, As white as this piece of paper. Whiter, if that's possible. Drained of any colour you could think of.
Starting point is 00:16:30 I don't even know if that picture does it justice, you know? It was like, greased. Like, everything was oozing. Eyes are weeping, nose is running, he's drooling. He's stick thin. He's basically a skeleton and he's he's panting and then I am I took this video Is that you Emmys? Can you say something mate? Can you say anything? Is that you? Do you recognise me? Hey, hey? Doddy, innit? Is that you, Emmus? Kill me.
Starting point is 00:17:10 What? What are you saying, pal? It's okay, I'm here. What are you saying? Kill me. Emmus! Emmus! Don't! Hey, Emus! Emus! Emus! He... just clawing and banging and screaming at the window over and over.
Starting point is 00:17:36 At the end there, he throws up on the window and that just, it nearly sends me off the boards and over the edge. I fall down on my knees, I scramble down a ladder and I'm in the car and I... I... Yeah. I've got...
Starting point is 00:17:59 I've got nothing else to say. Sorry. Thank you for sharing that, James. Yeah, yeah, thanks mate. Good, good work. Not easy, though. Cheers. Hmm, yes, quite the story. Rather strenuous, so much so, I feel we may need a little mini break. Sorry, what? Really? Yes. And I've just booked us a night at the Tuxbury Park Hotel and Spa. Oh god. We should probably go and pack our things. What... what does that mean?
Starting point is 00:18:34 It means, Doddy, that the game is afoot. All right. And what does that mean? It means we're gonna figure this out, okay? Even though he left the mic behind. Amateur. Absolute amateur. No Frills Delivers Get groceries delivered to your door from No Frills with PC Express. Shop online and get $15 in PC Optimum Points on your first five orders. Shop now at nofrills.ca. The GMC employee pricing event is on now. Get a big cash purchase discount of up to $12,300 on the 2025 GMC Sierra 1500 and the 2025 Sierra HD. With Sierra 1500's premium interior and advanced tech,
Starting point is 00:19:33 or Sierra HD's impressive power and capability, you'll have everything you need to get from work to play with confidence this season. Hurry in, employee pricing is on for a limited time. Visit your local GMC dealer for details. See, you should have got an automatic. Yeah, I prefer manual. Besides, they're cheaper. Yeah, to buy, but we we rented it. John, it was the same price. I just, I like to be in control of the gears. Yeah, that would be nice, but you nearly stalled it again.
Starting point is 00:20:06 That's because of this giant driveway, it's the gravel... Hmm. Look at this, it's a driveway for God's sake, and it's got this speed limit, three miles an hour. I mean, come on, three? I can't even go three! Warning, slippery surface. It's a gravel driveway at three miles an hour can we go anywhere in this country without having some busybody council or government holding our hand how much do all these signs cost the taxpayer by the way?
Starting point is 00:20:35 You're bearing to the right? Well I am 36 now happens doesn't it as you get older I mean the car the car is bearing Ah whoops yeah yep there we go well this is Tuxbury oh I love the gardens like like the whole landscaping they've done topiary topiary yes oh wow that view over that way ah I think I see our old grand house further along this driveway Sherlock do you want to narrate for the listeners so they know what we're way? Ah, I think I see our old grand house further along this driveway. Sherlock, do you want to narrate for the listeners so they know what we're witnessing? I think it's best
Starting point is 00:21:09 I conserve myself for observations, Watson. And who's going to do it, mate, because I'm driving. You can do both. It's a hire car. And there's deer and rabbits and the bloody animals of farthing wood frolicking around. I feel like I should concentrate. I'll do it. Oh, yeah. Sure. What? No, like, yeah, sure, do it. Uh-huh. Yeah, I heard the tone. I can detect tone, you know. I'm not stupid. Give me Mike the Mike. Yeah, there's Mike.
Starting point is 00:21:36 The rooms he spoke of, on the eastern face of the property, you see. Oh yeah. Only side with scaffolding, aren't they? Yes. The work in progress cloaked in that white curtain. A drape of tarpaulin, hiding the shame of disrepair, of damage and decay. Excuse me? Sorry, yeah, Sherlock marries Gunnuna 8, so go for it. In English, please. Yeah, I figured, thanks. Hi listeners, and welcome to Tuxbury in Bedford.
Starting point is 00:22:06 It was once known as Tuxbury Old Place. Bedfordshire. Bedford. Bedfordshire. Okay, why does that need correction? Well, Bedford is the town, the county town that the county Bedfordshire is named after. So? So we're not in Bedford.
Starting point is 00:22:23 But I saw road signs. We're not in Bedford, trust me, you would know. Why, is it not nice? No comment, because people always email when I say stuff like this. Okay, whatever. Welcome to Duxbury Park everybody. We're now right up to the house. Partly a residence now of course, and partly a hotel and spa since 2015. The family estate of
Starting point is 00:22:47 the Emsworths was co-managed by a trust that protects these these beautiful old homes but they make them work to earn their keep. Exactly so Tuxbury here is doing so as a hotel and a spa so as a hotel and a spa. And yeah, it looks honestly super nice. Like super nice. Right, now I realize that ghost hunting is very exciting, but if we could keep that info to ourselves and not share it with the hotel or spa staff, that would be great, thanks.
Starting point is 00:23:25 There we go. You're not going to park like this, are you? What's wrong with that? The angle, the distance to the bollard, you're 40cm from the car to our right, but 110cm from the car on our left. You're under a tree where pigeons are nesting. You've not powered down the air conditioning, you've got a seat warmer on as well for some reason. I'll power you down in a minute. You are in sport mode as well. Yes, well, observation mode on my Sherlock is clearly set to full, isn't it? Come on! Booking under homes.
Starting point is 00:23:55 Okay, that's the pine room, is it? Yes. Erm, that's with the three beds and you're booked for the breakfast as well, lovely. Okay, let me get your keycards and I'll bring you a menu for the spa. Okay? But, er, what are you thinking? I selected the Pine Room due to its location within the house. The map of the hotel says it's way over on the west side. Sherlock? Indeed.
Starting point is 00:24:19 The Emsworths live in the eastern wing? They do, yes. Okay, you get Marianna's point, right? Your key cards are here. I've got three of them. Thank you. Sherlock. Come.
Starting point is 00:24:30 You wish to have your questions answered? I will show you. I think we should maybe ask the reception about the M-Sworths. There'll be a spa menu in the room. Oh, OK, cool. Down this way. Yeah, yeah, in a rush. Oh, we always like to go on a relaxing spa weekend. Everybody's in rows. Yeah, yeah, in a rush. Oh, we're always nice to go on a relaxing spa weekend.
Starting point is 00:24:46 Everybody's in rows. Yeah, yeah, it's weird, isn't it? Oh, now I want one. They look so cozy. Through this way. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Not as easy with the suitcase, mate. And here we have the Pine Suite. Oh, nice! Wow, look at this bathtub!
Starting point is 00:25:08 Oh my god, it's got like the... the... um... The spouts for bubbles on the side! Ho ho, like a jacuzzi! Oh, that is so cool! Excuse me. I'm answering your concerns. Are you? Yes. Listen.
Starting point is 00:25:26 You're drying up tap dancing? No. What's the deal with the floor, mate? I don't get what you're on about. You want to know why I picked this room? Ground floor is the answer. It's the only place to stay on the ground floor. OK.
Starting point is 00:25:43 And beneath my feet is? The ground?. Oookay. And beneath my feet is... Uh, the ground? The undercroft. What the hell is an undercroft? Many centuries ago, the servants of this house were expected to move like shadows, present but never seen. Their passage through the home was to be swift, silent and forgettable. That's where the undercroft came in rather handy.
Starting point is 00:26:03 A network of narrow stone tunnels beneath the house, linking one wing to another. Tuxbury was built by the Tuxbrees in 1651, royalists fleeing the parliamentarian fury of London. Roots for escape and concealment were priorities. A home threaded with underground tunnels was less a curiosity as it is to us now, and more a necessity. But as Britain performed one of its characteristic reversals – panic followed by national remorse – the danger passed, and the tunnels found a new purpose.
Starting point is 00:26:38 Servants. Servants. Laundry, food, parcels – all moved through the undercroft. From kitchen to parlour, nursery to library, the family was fed and clothed, their needs met while the machinery that sustained them remained discreet. We will serve the masters of the house once more. We will? We will.
Starting point is 00:26:58 When? Tonight. What are we doing tonight? Hunting for the ghost of Freddy... Emsworth. Great. Good luck getting an ad read on this one, mate. Come on then.
Starting point is 00:27:13 Oh wow. How is it? It's... Yeah, it's pretty cozy. Wait, what do you mean, cozy? Like, uh, it's tight. Any rags? Um... Yeah, it's pretty cozy. Wait, what do you mean, cozy? Like, it's tight.
Starting point is 00:27:27 Any rats? Erm... no? Could we hurry? Okay, wow. Oh, why can't we just have spa treatments? Why do we have to do stupid stuff like this? We come all the way, all the way out to Bedford to this beautiful place and now we're crawling around with rats. Again, it's Bedfordshire, it's not Bedford.
Starting point is 00:27:56 I hope a rat eats you. Can we keep the petty squabbling to a minimum? The undercroft will open into many different chambers. We do not know who else may be listening. Don't say stuff like that. Why not? Because. Because why?
Starting point is 00:28:11 We do not know who else might be listening. Well, we don't. Enough. We continue through this passage and in 30 yards or so it will fork southwards towards the old servants' quarters, eastwards to the current living quarters. And what do we do then? We infiltrate. We observe. You know, if it really is a ghost, you have to use the microphone.
Starting point is 00:28:35 Why? What, to ghosts like to podcast, do they? No, no, you plant the microphone and you capture exactly what is going on. Plant the microphone where? Exactly. Left here. We go to the microphone where? Exactly. Left here. We go to the room that James said. Corner bedroom, east wing, upper floor.
Starting point is 00:28:51 Correct. We get near there and we plant the microphone. Pick up everything that's going on in there and then we have our evidence. We can say here is the actual ghost of Freddie Emsworth. Well, the spooky tunnel has clearly sent you mad. I think it's a good idea. So, what? We don't wish to disturb this family, do we?
Starting point is 00:29:10 Well, no, but- Then we shall leave the mic. Come back for it tomorrow and listen to our evidence. Right, but- Stop. This here, this is a chute. Like a laundry chute? Indeed. At the top will be our room. Okay.
Starting point is 00:29:29 I know I'm pretty athletic but I might struggle to climb that mate. You don't need to Watson. Oh yeah send Mariana up. Up you go, Mass. Up, up, up. Get up. Ow. None of us need to venture up there except for this little guy. Mike the Mike. Mike the Mike. On this pulley system once we open the doors to the chute. Ah, a little rusty. There we go. We place him on this platform here, pull on this until it stops and that will mean Mike is at the upper level and sat right behind the thin panel that separates our recording device from our ghost. Right well I guess we'll see you in a bit Mike. Yeah bye bye Mike. Farewell Mike. Bye listeners good luck with the ghosts. Don't freak out. If it's terrifying, please don't email me. This is his episode. I'm going to go to the airport. No.
Starting point is 00:31:16 Oh, God. Hedwig. Hedwig. Hedwig, I had you. I had you talking. You were talking to someone. I heard it. Why boy? Why? Did you want that man? He lost you. My boy. My beautiful boy. He lost you. Please. Please, please. Did you get the full body one? It was just a head massage.
Starting point is 00:32:03 Oh, nice. I don't really like people touching me, so... Head massage. Any good? Oh, it was perfect. Perfection. Nice. What did you get? Full bod.
Starting point is 00:32:21 Unbelievable. I fell asleep. Oh my god. So did I. Amazing. Well, not amazing, because I would have liked to stay awake if it was that good. Ugh, like first class on a plane. Exactly, wouldn't want to sleep on the flight, I just want to stay awake, enjoy myself. But it's so good that... You fall asleep. Mm-hmm, exactly. It's a paradox.
Starting point is 00:32:39 The comfort paradox. Hmm... Oh, that's what this is. Mm-hmm, exactly. It's a paradox. The comfort paradox. Hmm... Hmm... Oh, that's what this is. It's comfort. It's... Peace. It's knowing that... What on earth are you doing? Why are you in dressing gowns?
Starting point is 00:32:58 We are decompressing in a fine mist with hints of jasmine and lavender. What are you doing? Well, I said you could have an hour. It's been two hours. I thought you were still uploading the audio. Well, have you listened? Do we have ourselves a ghost? Perhaps. Wait, what? My beautiful boy, we lost you. Please, please!
Starting point is 00:33:25 Who is that? The man? Please, please! Who is that? The man? I had a hunch, and I confirmed it this morning. Who is it? I walked the hallways of Tuxbury at breakfast and I introduced myself to the Colonel. Wait, is that him? Indeed. Colonel Emsworth. Seemingly, conversing with the ghost of his deceased son. Or so I thought. Until...
Starting point is 00:33:52 Until I entered the room. What? The actual room? Where he is? How? Through the undercroft and up the laundry chute, while you two were pampering one another. We were being pampered by trained professionals. What did you see? Sherlock, what did you see? See? Never mind see. I solved the case.
Starting point is 00:34:12 Sorry, what? I solved it, my dear companions. Case very much closed. Wait, what? Can we listen? Listen to what? To you. Solving the case. How would you do that?
Starting point is 00:34:24 It would be on the SD card, in the mic. You... You took the mic with you, right? It was uploading. Yeah, the SD card was, but you still have the mic. Yes, I just picked it up now. After the upload was complete. Please tell me you took the mic.
Starting point is 00:34:40 Please tell me when you solved the case and confronted what on earth is going on in this giant haunted house. Please tell me you took the mic. Ah. Yes. I see the problem. Oh, you are the worst podcast host in the world. The worst. The worst.
Starting point is 00:34:58 And that is a dreadful list to come top of, mate. Dreadful. What happened, Sherlock? I can mend this. I'm sure of it. I just need time. He'll need a couple of weeks, I'd say. Sorry, sorry, listen, I've fixed a fair amount of shit in the edit, right? I've polished a turd or two, mate, but you have missed out on the entire case and its conclusion.
Starting point is 00:35:19 Because you two were at a spa. You said you were the host! You were in charge! I just need time. How much time? Two weeks. Two weeks. Can you please adjust your robe? John, I really don't need this day to get any worse.
Starting point is 00:35:33 I'm sorry, I'm just struggling with the fact that this guy recorded a podcast without a microphone. With the success of your Patreon membership as well, it's fantastic. Yeah, and I think winning the Webby and reaching over 10 million downloads was... Well, amazing. Yeah, completely, completely. And I'm just hoping that the newfound interest kind of gets some advertisers thinking that we could do some sponsored reads for them to promote their prod... Okay, are we ready?
Starting point is 00:36:03 Shut... sorry, I'm doing an interview, Sherlock. You're in your pajamas. Shush! Do you need to be arranged, John? No, no, no, no, no, it's okay. Yes we do, bye bye. Sherlock! Why are you doing an interview and why are you in your pajamas?
Starting point is 00:36:16 Because it's the morning! People like our podcast and want to know more about it, is that okay? But I told you to wait two weeks. For- for what? The Blanched Soldier. Freddie Emsworth. Doddy. What now?
Starting point is 00:36:31 It's been two weeks. Oh for goodness sake. Can I get some warning please? I warned you fourteen days ago. That's not the kind of warning I meant! Ah, that'll be Doddy. Ugh, for god's sake. Ow! Stupid trousers.
Starting point is 00:36:48 Oh, why? Archie, mate, why do you have to move the socks around the flat? Can't you get a real hobby? Here we are. This is 221B. Love it. What a location, by the way. Ah, here he is. John Watson, you recall. No doubt. Hi, John, mate.
Starting point is 00:37:09 You struggling with that t-shirt? Yeah, no, getting there. Take a seat, mate. Be right with you. Sure, yeah. So what's this all about, then, gents? We paid a visit to Tuxbury House. Ah, you really went through with it, did you?
Starting point is 00:37:26 We did indeed. I was just, eh, have yourself a little bubble bath and all that. Saunering yourself, yeah? Those activities were indulged by some members of the team, yes. Why not, eh? Put your feet up. I didn't get the opportunity, unfortunately. I was busy.
Starting point is 00:37:42 With the Colonel. Okay, T-shirt is on. Unfortunately, I was busy......with the Colonel. Okay, T-shirt is on. You spoke to him? For some time, yes. You didn't tell him? Well, I saw, did ya? You didn't say that- You seem ashamed. Well, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:58 Why? Cos. Shame has hidden Freddy away for too long, Doddy. Hidden, Freddy? What do you mean? I thought it better I show you, and hopefully salvage my friend's little audio show. I'll be right back. Can I get you tea or anything, Doddy? No!
Starting point is 00:38:23 No. No. Sorry. No. I didn't mean to snap. I just... Nervous? Yeah. I don't really know what he's up to here. Yeah, he likes to operate that way. What, er... What are you afraid you'll see?
Starting point is 00:38:41 A ghost? Something like that. Sergeant James M Dodd. This is Colonel Emsworth. Hello, sir. James. This is Dr John Watson, a Lieutenant and MO himself, of the 5th Northumberland Fusiliers. Goodness.
Starting point is 00:38:58 Hello there, Watson. Sir? Well, then. Well then, indeed. I think an apology is needed. James, if you'd like to go first. Sorry, what? An apology to Colonel Emsworth here. Sorry, what, for looking through the window of your manor? No, not that.
Starting point is 00:39:24 Well, what? I don't know what you're trying to make me- You use, James. I use? Yes. Persistent dilation of the pupils, even in low lighting. Dry lips and nose, bursts of enthusiasm followed by rushes of irritation and instability. Jaw twitching and tremors even when idle and not conversing. All that aside, I myself will frequent the usage of self-medication more than enough to recognize it in somebody else,
Starting point is 00:39:53 even if all the clues were taken away from me. He's a very vulnerable and impressionable young man. And, uh, while drugs may have been an easy thing for you to handle, or even enjoy, he is not. He's vulnerable, okay? You should never, never have introduced him to those things. I'm sorry. And now your turn, Colonel Emsworth. We lied to you. He returned from Ukraine. I'm sorry. Freddy, for whatever reason, was very unwell. Probably my doing, let's be honest. Always the farmer. He was such a delicate little boy, you know, and I just built this... No, I forced this hardened shell around him. This scaffold, to use a term that you're familiar with, Mr. Dodds that perhaps obstructed and blocked out the real boy inside.
Starting point is 00:41:27 And of course, because of all that, he had a very challenging, I suppose they would say these days, mental health prognosis. And I will swear to any doctor, and I swear it now, nothing fixes a man's mental health more than the presence of other men and structure. And the Marines later, the army was, and he was misled. And he took to, well, he would get involved with many things, eventually even heroin, excuse me, regularly. When I found out just of course just a few weeks ago, I just
Starting point is 00:42:30 I knew I am not gonna live the rest of my life with regrets over how I raised him. I did what all proper decent parents should do. I picked him up out of that den, that cesspit, and I dragged him home and locked him in a room and let him stick it out until that poison flushed out of him.
Starting point is 00:42:55 I promised him, promised that he could be who he wanted to be, that the Freddians side would be free. No more army, no more career referrals from me, always mother. It was a fight for freedom that only he could face. And I tell you, oh, goodness me, I've been shot at. Goodness, have I been shot at. I've been captured. I have sent men to early graves. I've held their mothers, wives, girlfriends while they were weeping at me and beat me to say that putting Freddie through that was the hardest thing I've ever done. Lock my son in a room and watch him like that, weight, color, light, or vanishing from him.
Starting point is 00:43:56 To say it was the hardest thing I've ever done is not something I say lightly. But it was. I say lightly. But it was. I was ashamed. All of us, we were full of panic and shame. And Mr. Holmes here has allowed us to see the light. To let the colour return. To our family. Where is he? Come on Freddy lad. No, I didn't know! I didn't tell you, I didn't tell anyone, it was all... It was all getting too much mate!
Starting point is 00:44:49 I know mate! I'm just so sorry! I know! I'm so sorry! Pal, Jesus! Shut up with your sorrys mate! God! It's good to see you Freddy. You too.
Starting point is 00:45:03 Here he is. Come here Andrew. Right Watson. Legs are working then? Yeah. Ears are working too then. Because I did say for you to come back
Starting point is 00:45:18 off the road, but you didn't listen and look what happened. I was always saying you should listen to me more. Yeah, yeah, yeah. sense of humor has come back then has it colors come back to your face too the hairline mmm yeah yeah yeah there's a bit touch and go for a bit you have taken a big step Freddie and I wish you all the best with the rest of your journey thank you I'm sorry we thought you were a creepy ghost. Oh, no worries, mate. I'm in cold water.
Starting point is 00:45:50 You'll be pleased to know I have kept my opioids locked away. Should they derail any recovery? Sorry, you've done what? Locked them away. Opioids? Yes. Like heroin, you mean? Very, very similar.
Starting point is 00:46:04 But much less turbulent high, I find. Right! Feel like maybe we should head off. And anyone should just head off. Let's take you downstairs. And now you hit upload, right? Hit upload? No. No, he doesn't hit upload. He emails producer Neil, and Neil does the upload. Why don't you do it? Do they not trust you? It's no, it's not that. They think you're gonna delete all the rest of his history episodes or something.
Starting point is 00:46:32 No, it's, this is just the way I do things. People like me and Rory and Gaz, we don't do the uploads. No, no. You are not calling Gary Lineker Gaz. People call him Gaz. Yeah, sure. His close friends and family. That's not you. No, don't send it yet. You haven't linked to the file. Ah, okay. There we go. And I can't tempt you to change the adventure name?
Starting point is 00:46:55 The Blanched Soldier. Yeah. No, you can't. Fine. Fine. Um... Yeah, episode description is good, members club episode's done... Er... okay. So now hit send. And... there we go. Adventure is officially sent and we'll be in... that's... weird.
Starting point is 00:47:21 What is? It's... that's actually still uploading, it's... weird. What is? It's... that's actually still uploading. Wait. Sherlock, this is four hours long. Yes? Why is it four hours long? I wanted to contextualise the case. What, by waffling on about it for four hours?
Starting point is 00:47:37 Yes. No? Why not? People say you drag these things out anyway, so why not appeal to those that want more material? By deleting this, delete... Hey! Oh, for God's sake, what's this? That's my concerto. You... you put some violin in for 40... 44 minutes?
Starting point is 00:47:52 It was a means to show a loss of innocence, and a plunge into darkness. Oh, for f... I'm gonna plunge into darkness in a minute, what's this? I have a no-lodge policy! And NordVPN allows its users to... What the hell is this? Oh, it's an ad read. Oh god. What, they... they gave you an ad read?
Starting point is 00:48:09 Yes. Okay, I'm gonna go. Bye. I cannot... cannot believe it. That's NordVPN. Suitable for all master detectives. It's NordVPN! NordVPN!
Starting point is 00:48:24 Are you kidding me? It's not the end. Are you kidding me? Thank you for listening to the case of the Blanched Soldier. I can tell you that all remains well with Freddie Emsworth and… well, you can't see this, but I have an image of him working in an office with Doddy, so it would seem he took the job after all. I hope you enjoyed the case, we will see you soon. Please do get in touch. Okay.
Starting point is 00:48:54 Done. All good? Mm-hmm. You hated every second of that, didn't you? Every single one.

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