She's On The Money - Do You Actually Want to Buy a House or Just Feel Like You Should?

Episode Date: June 19, 2025

It starts as a simple question: should I buy a house or invest in the share market? What begins as a classic money dilemma quickly unravels into a much bigger conversation... about pressure, identity, and whether the goals we’re chasing are even ours to begin with. Plus, we tackle a seriously juicy DM about uprooting your entire family for a “life-changing” job (that may only last a few years), whether commuting ruins your happiness, and why it might be time to outsource your vacuuming. Oh, and there’s also a heated musical theatre debate and some spicy ADHD brain revelations in there too.WANT LEARN HOW TO INVEST? The Investing Masterclass is here.  Ready for more laughs, lessons, and unhinged money chats? Check out our oh-so-bingeable Friday Drinks playlist. Listen here. Join our 300K+ She's on the Money community in our Facebook Group and on Instagram.  Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, my name is Natasha Nabanunga-Bamblett. I'm a proud Yorta Yorta, Kernai, Wolperi and Awadjeri woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on Awadjeri country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through. As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow. Let's get into it. She's on the money. She's on the money.

hello and welcome to she's on the money the podcast that makes personal finance fun especially on fridays it's our favorite day of the week because we get to get our team together and then we celebrate you, our incredible She's On The Money community. Miss Jessica Ricci, as always, is here sharing our favourite money wins. Miss Bex Syed is sharing her broke tips and we're going to be helping to answer a money dilemma, which this week is about whether you should buy a house or invest and something that you slid into our DMs about, whether it's worth uprooting your family for a job that might be temporary.

But before we get there, my loves, mid-June, how are we? Little bit of a weather check-in, I suppose. Yeah, the sads are real. Trying to find anything exciting to look forward to. Actually, I have a question I need the people to answer for me. Are we the people or is this? It's open to the room, but I don't think either of you have done it. So I'm opening it to the people of the listeners.

Okay. We've recommended, I'm pretty sure, Today Tix, the app. I'm trying to find Joy. I really want to go see a musical, but musicals are very expensive. So I've been trying to do that thing. Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson's musical? No.

Okay, no, I wouldn't have thought that. Where did that come from? She wants to see Wicked Girl. I want to see Beetlejuice and I want to see Hadestown are the two at the moment that I really want to see. Okay. Anyway, you can get like really cheap tickets on this thing. They go on sale at 9am.

Every morning at 9am, I'm on this app. Like I'm on this app from 8.55, refreshing, like waiting for the button to turn so you can like buy the tickets, right? And I hit it the second my clock hits nine o'clock and it says all the tickets are gone. and i just need to know am i an idiot or is like i like i don't know if it's pre-loading so i don't know has anyone ever had any success with the app is what i want to know because i'm desperate for like 55 tickets but is it a e d t or whatever it is whatever we're in no because there's like a countdown which is quite good like i appreciate it's like everyone i hate a countdown unnecessary

morning anxiety but that's actually a great point but it's it's kind of like well i know that i haven't missed it because I get a notification at like quarter two I think that says oh the tickets go on sale soon and then like you can't click the button till it like ticks over which I like yes but in a second everybody else is clicking it faster than you um I feel like I have the fastest fingers in the west yeah still I'm like bang it's still gone do you reckon people are using like bots do you remember back in the day people would talk about like ebay bots yeah that would like do their bidding at the very last minute and like that's how i used to lose on bardo jeans and stuff back in 2010 i don't know i just was very i was like what am i doing wrong so if anyone's ever

i don't know what you're doing wrong managed it please let me know let me if you've got to try but i'm happy to try for you yeah thank you send us the link i'll get everyone on at 9am every morning we're all yeah yeah genuinely also um if any of you work for the pr company that does Beetlejuice. Please. Beetlejuice tickets. Just like slide into our DMs because I have a sneaky suspicion. Jess might even work for free.

I 100% would. What did you say? I can get you. Jess hasn't locked into everything. Just locked into everything I said. No, I can get you Beetlejuice tickets. We're giving them away at work. I didn't realize you wanted.

Stop it. I'm so sorry. I didn't realize. I'll post. I'll tag. Kiss. I don't care. Go for it.

Jess listens to nothing else. Do you want to come with me? Should we go? It'll be a fun team thing. I just can't imagine anything worse. Are you joking? I think you'd bloody love it. I'm just kidding.

Are you going to a musical or going to Beetlejuice? I think musical in general. Oh, I thought you meant hanging out with us outside of work. That's obviously that too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like musical, I don't know what Beetlejuice is. I just like. Oh, God.

I really thought you'd love a musical. Have you been to a musical before? That's so nice. I've been to a musical. I just want to know what they're saying, but they're just singing the whole time. They don't sing the whole time. They don't sing the whole time?

No, unless it's Hamilton. But most of the time it's just like bursts of song in between theatres. I'm not going to lie. We went and saw Hamilton together. You didn't love it. I hated it. Victoria did not love it. I hated it.

Like I hated Hamilton. I'm so sorry. No, I understand. Like you don't care. There are going to be a lot of people listening to this that are very salty on me because it's like for a lot of people, the OG. Like I know lots of people because Jess and I, like we didn't just see it in Melbourne. No.

We saw it on the West End. It was lovely. Wow. we are fancy yeah and i was posting i'm gonna go see hamilton and people were like dming me being like i've seen hamilton five times and i need to see it on the west end and i'm thinking why though like do you hate yourself i reckon it's because we are not familiar with the u.s history and because the history why are we singing about it i think we probably have the same brain in that like we can't really like well i don't know about you but i can't even absorb the

information when because it sounds like it's getting to a juicy part they're like it's really juicy and then someone starts singing the rest and i'm like feel it wow i don't feel it i'm just like i'm really desperately trying to absorb what they're saying i think that's probably what it is i'm like at the very peak when i need this next bit of juice it is presented in a way that is so i can't understand anymore we process things so differently that's so interesting isn't it i nearly fell asleep yeah she was not yeah i was not in it then we left I was like, oh, thank God, that's over. At intermission, I was trying to leave.

Yeah, we were like, absolutely not. I'm putting this in my calendar really quick in case I forget. Beetlejuice for Jess Rickey. Oh, my God, this is the best thing ever. Good job. Thank you. I can't believe you. I still want to know how to use the app because I'm sure I'm going to at some point try and get other cheap tickets.

So if anyone knows, let me know. But sure. Thank you so much. I love this. You've made my day. And send me the link and we will jump on at nine and do the. I appreciate you. How do we meet?

Anyway, I feel like I've just spoken about. Oh, no, you're silly. Don't be silly, it's so fun. It's cold, it's cold, it's cold. I'm happy to be home because for those who remember, I was in Brisbane for a little while and I'm just such a homebody, you know. I don't want to be anywhere else. So I'm happy to be home.

It is very cold and I honestly don't think I have a single interesting thing to bring to the table other than I'm home and I'm happy about it. And we're so happy you're back. Apparently a Hamilton hater. God, we're going to get so many hate comments this week. I'm sorry. I balance them out. I'm a huge musical nerd.

Don't hate us, please. Yes, true. We don't hate you. Do you know what we love though? Five-star reviews. Yes, give us one of those. We do. Are you ready?

So this is from Fiona. I found She's On The Money in the second year of university and it is safe to say it's completely changed my life. I was spending impulsively and didn't know what I was saving for. This podcast sparked my passion for budgets and investing. I now have investments, know where all of my money goes, have an emergency fund, understand finance jargon, and I'm setting myself up for the future. I love the vibes of the pod and the content is always empowering me to keep working on my

finances. VD's transparency on her ADHD also started my journey to my ADHD diagnosis, which has also changed my life. I will continue to listen for a long time to keep learning and laughing. Gorgeous. That's a nice thank you. And to think for so long, I was like embarrassed to talk about my ADHD. I feel like it's like a relatively trendy now, which I'm not going to lie as someone who got diagnosed at like 18, 19, I'm a bit like, oh, so you're telling me I didn't need to get all of my Ritalin tablets, pop them out and put them into a separate container so that when I had them at university, people couldn't tell what I was taking. And they thought I was just taking a Panadol because I was genuinely like, if these girls at uni see me with Ritalin in

my bag they're gonna think I'm crazy right right right it's good the times have changed Dexys what do you take how does it work oh have you talked to your psych about this like totally the times have changed times change and we need to talk about it because if it is something you are struggling with it is life-changing and also so validating validating for sure yeah I wouldn't be surprised that the reason we don't like musicals has something to do with yeah without And Jess is just like, they really empower me. I just really enjoy sitting down and staring at something for an hour and a half for a five-minute intermission

and then another hour and a half of one consistent show. It's like my favourite thing in the world. Do you know what I hate about going back to this? Musicals, going to the theatre. I went to the theatre the other day. Ballet, same thing. What do you mean? I'm not allowed to play on my phone.

Oh, yes. What do you mean? I've just got to be locked into one thing and it would be rude to get my phone out. my whole brain so I went to a Melbourne Symphony Orchestra what is it like a concert the other day right oh it's like a month ago with my best friend Harriet and she was like so excited but like my brain during that period of time I'm like thinking about everything I've done wrong in life I'm thinking about oh I wonder how many people are on the stage I'm counting how many people are on the

stage I'm thinking oh I wonder what sound that is or where what instruments making that I'm trying to pinpoint the instruments on stage. Looking at the conductor, I'm wondering what type of degree the conductor had to get. Are you imagining yourself conducting? Yeah, I'm like, oh, I could definitely do that. He doesn't look like he's doing much. And then I'm like, do people watch him and read the music? Like my brain is going a million miles an hour. I'm thinking of what I can cook when I leave. I'm thinking of what notifications might be on my phone. And then Harriet's like, did you like that song? And I'm thinking, what song? Totally. I know I'm thinking the same thing. I'm thinking how long did it take to set up the stage? Am I going to be cold when I walk

back to my car after this because it's going to be quite late should have parked closer like that's what makes the world so differently this is so interesting because like when I watch something like that I'm like I'm like live music especially like if there's no story I'm like picturing worlds in my mind like I'm somewhere else I'm thinking what's in my fridge I wonder if those blueberries are soft yet if they're soft should I freeze them for smoothies or should I just chuck them out oh chuck them out i've chucked something else out one time one time i chucked a jumper out like my brain just goes in bloody loops and then someone will interrupt my train of thought and be like what are you thinking about and i'll be like oh you interrupted my train of thought and

then i'm back thinking and i'm like trains yes yes and then yeah when people say what are you thinking about you're like it's impossible to narrow that it could have been three seconds of thought and 20 million things you've visited yeah yeah it's impossible the back of that head down sitting in front of me really does look like my neighbor i wonder it is can i imagine my neighbor coming to a concert like this like yeah my brain she doesn't stop no no no i'm not saying like you know when people say my brain doesn't stop and you go oh that's so impressive it's not impressive jessica it sounds exhausting yeah it's humbling like i'm not consistently thinking of new business ideas. I'm not consistently thinking of things that could help the world. I'm like,

hmm, I don't know. Does my neighbor have hair that looks like that? I kid you not. And you may never know because I'll disappear into the crowd and you'll just have to wonder. It did happen. Was it your neighbor? I don't know because he disappeared into a crowd, Jessica. There you go. Anyway, talk to me. What have we got when it comes to community money wins? Alrighty. Nothing musical themed, sadly, but very on brand. I have a money win from Bea who said she won an ngv membership for a year cool boring i love that for you yeah victoria alden doesn't love a museum or a gallery either i don't mind an art gallery yeah no i do i do you i do like an art gallery jess took me to an art gallery um when she said we basically tried to send me home

we went to moma in new york which honestly doesn't live up to the hype all you can say zero out of ten would not recommend with vd or book can we just can we just say that i wasn't on my own in that you took two adhd girlies and then expected them to not go up the walls i mean to be fair i said i'm so happy to go by myself no we wanted to say that we went yeah i see well that's good to know that jess was really stressed knowing that you guys were not having fun. Why have they got jars of fingernails there? Real questions. Don't ruin it for me because I want to go and I don't want any spoilers. Okay sorry. I do feel you would love it. I feel like I would like I love a jar of fingernails. There's a lot of places that you

can sit though. That's good that's what you need. Yeah. Next I've got a money win from Madeline who said money win I forgot my opal card this morning I got to the metro and there's signs everywhere that say free travel today all the gates were open thank you so much universe. Hey that's cool isn't it when just a little thing when the world aligns for you it's such a good feeling why is it free travel that's great really cool i wonder if they do the melbourne because obviously opal is sydney anyway next i've got a money win from monique who said she got a ten dollar gift voucher from yochi because it was her birthday money we all love you your birthday's coming up vd so if yours is too it is we could time it to use it within the same week i reckon i reckon yeah if

you don't have a yochi account everybody we should do a birthday where you can see how much free stuff we can get i had actually thought about that i thought it would be a very good tiktok to be like yeah how many things how many things but also have you ever gone to yoji and only spent ten dollars well that's so true but all of a sudden my fifteen dollar thing is only five and that's a money that's a good deal you're basically making money exactly right next i've got a money win from lou said she went into just jeans this week to try on a denim dress and the sales assistant advised that they could price match the online prices online it was 40 off so she managed to call that in store that's so nice so good i do that sometimes when stuff i want is out of stock

like if there's an online sale that's really good and the thing you wanted is sold out but it's not on sale in store i'll just go in store and say can you match the online price and nine times out of ten they say yes genius and then you get the size that you wanted and then lastly this week i've got a money win from wanda who said money win i've been doing so well with saving mostly due to cooking rather than buying takeaway so i decided to buy a convection microwave air fryer at checkout I noticed the good guys had a compare prices button. So I had already checked competitors, you know, myself. I looked at the other websites.

I wasn't expecting anything. However, I was pleasantly surprised when their button found a $10 saving, which they then passed on to her. Hey, nice. Check price. That's so nice. I've never even heard of that. That's a money win.

Crazy. I thought that was very good. So well done to the good guys. Well done. That's it for me. Good wrap from you, Ms. Bex Syed. Let's quick fire your broke tips because we yapped too much about Hamilton. That's okay. Okay. So this first one comes from Rachel who says that if you join

Hoyts, it's $15 a year, you can get unlimited refills. So if you go to the movies, you refill. I know it's not like the drinks portion of the night you wouldn't think about. It's like, I'm not going to be spending a mozza on soft drink, but it's just another little extra cost that you don't have to worry about when you go, which I think is great. And also I'm assuming with a Hoyts membership, you get some other benefits as well, like cheap tickets, things like that. It comes after what I said a few weeks ago about, I think it was like Uber One or something. The $1 ticket. Yeah. Really, really cheap tickets, free popcorn, all this kind of stuff. So that is fantastic. And what they do is they just fill up an empty vessel of any kind

and then just keep getting refills. And then there you go. You're suffering for the week. And this next one comes from Nat who says, this is actually very, very smart. You know how you get like, you know, your loyalty cards and you have free coffee. If you use those specifically on public holidays or Sundays, you know, when there's like a surcharge, then you are in a way saving a lot of money because like if you're using it on every other day of the week, then it's just like coffee's expensive anyway, but a public holiday surcharge on top of that, my God. So make sure you use those, save those and use those on public holidays, unless you can't afford it on a day, use it whenever the hell you want. So I think that's

so clever. My one is really, really silly and dumb, but I just saw my partner sent me this video this girl who had this tomato sauce bottle I'm sure you guys probably have seen this but it's like you know when you have like tomato sauce or any kind of sauce bottle it's so unsatisfying when it's like you're shaking it you're doing that thing where you're trying to get the rest of it out but it just will not come out and so you just go to chuck the whole thing out there's probably like two three maybe four servings still left that's just coating the bottle and you're like wow I can't get it out I'm just going to chuck it out but instead what you could do if you have limber shoulders good rotator cuff centrifugal force yes if you um it's gonna be hard

to explain to people who are listening but say you're gonna get your arms you're gonna go full go-go gadget yeah full 360 hold the bottle at the end like you're a cricket bowler yeah don't stop you don't stop you hold it down and don't let go going to go i need an example of I can jump up and give you a good example I do it it's very satisfying you kind of like going around in the sauce bottle Jess and it's like it's like I don't know how good it is for your rotator cuffs is what I'm worried about whatever free sauce yeah and I guess you have to do that when you're like exercising you have to like do that one thing where you do that the you I can't explain it but I hope you guys understand we're all not just putting a little

bit of water in there shaking it up and then using tomato sauce but what about storing it upside down okay genius yes yes you do can do that too but but sometimes they're in that like glass but you know a sweet and sour sauce where it's like that glass bottle with that top that is like i know what you're talking you know it's like that's not holding anything and then i opened it it's going everywhere it's going everywhere and also it's coming out as it's sat there just doing nothing because it's just like, it's not very, what's the word I'm thinking of? It's not like sealing it properly. Yes. Yes. Perfect. Wow. So centrifugal force. We're going to have someone do an example. This week is centrifugal force. I will not give you any context.

That's me. I love that. All right. Well, let's go to a really quick break. On the flip side, we're going to be answering a money dilemma, which this week is about whether you should buy a house or start investing. And then something that you slid into our DMs about whether it's worth uprooting your family for a job that might actually just be temporary. So guys, don't go anywhere. Welcome back, everybody. Let's take a listen to this week's Money Dilemma. Hi there. Have you got a money dilemma you just can't solve? The She's on the Money team is here to help. Every week, we tackle your dilemmas, both big and small, to answer your most burning money, career and life questions. To get involved, simply head to our website and leave us a short

voice recording and you might just find yourself on the show. Now let's take a listen to this week's Money Dilemma. Hi, she's on the money. I had a quick question I wanted to ask you. So I'm weighing up whether I should be trying to buy a house or whether I should be trying to invest my money. So for a bit of context, I'm 23 years old and I've just graduated from university and I'm currently in my first full-time job and while I was at uni I was able to save about $20,000 keeping in mind that I am planning on putting some aside as an emergency fund so this would give me about 10 to 15 grand left to play with. So obviously that's not quite enough to buy a house right now and with my lack of work history but I'm wondering whether within the next one to two

years of full-time work I could probably save enough to buy something. However I am also wondering if investing would be a smarter option given that it's a bit more flexible and might give me a bit more room to you know move within my career and do different things. The other information I think is important is that I'm hoping to pursue a PhD in the next few years so I'm wondering if I should be focusing on buying a house before I do that to kind of get my foot in the door before I stop having full-time income. So I'm also single for a bit of context so I'm making plans kind of around this at the moment and I would love your thoughts and insights thank you so much ah por que no los dos yeah what would you guys do well I was just gonna say like there's a

few thoughts I have first of all I feel like if you're about to do a PhD and you won't have like a full-time income or like stable income then maybe like buying a house it's not a good time for that but my main question is do you want to buy a house or is it like you think you should buy yeah like this is what society says i should do by this age blah blah like do you actually want to buy a house because if you do then like then i think victoria would say don't invest it's too risky put it in a high interest savings account or a term deposit is which is where you lock your money in you don't even need me if you could actually you know what you could if you could leave the whole studio that would be nice because i can take it from here but yeah thanks as long

as you continue the Hamilton hate, I'm happy to leave. Absolutely. Hold her legacy strong, she says. You hold that side of the fort up and I don't need to pick you. No, and if we're remembered for nothing else, it's that we didn't like. That I never liked Hamilton in the musical. Term deposit for anyone who needs context for that, it's just like a savings account where you like lock in your money

for a specific amount of interest for a specific amount of time. Like you can't touch it. I mean you can, but then there's fees, I think. Anyway, so like term deposit is an option if you don't trust yourself to have all this money in a savings account and you're like, I can't just have it sitting there because I'm going to be spending it all. So lock it in somewhere where you can still access this. It's really low risk. And then when you feel ready and you've saved a little bit more, then start looking to buy a house. But if you don't actually want to buy a house and you're like, this is money that I'm happy to

put in shares forever then do that I would say but you can do like half half whatever that's me yeah I feel like it's I mean I personally would probably invest like I look back and I wish that I had had the literacy that you have now when I was 23 well done on your savings well done on thinking so far ahead getting in front of the ball that's absolutely incredible from you. I wish that I had had that knowledge and that forethought when I was your age. I would say there's a lot of things to touch on. We've done a whole episode actually called, should I buy a house or should I invest? I'm pretty sure. I would just go listen to that episode. We may link it in the show notes, but I think like there's a lot of reflection to be

done on what are your goals? You know, I think having your money in the share market, particularly taking on that PhD might give you a bit of flexibility. I know that a PhD is already such a significant undertaking it's really stressful having mortgage repayments on top of that yeah that's where I was might be a lot yeah but there's a lot to consider so I would just say go listen to that episode because that's the reason we made it I feel like this is something a lot of people think about yeah give us the cliff notes well 100% I think rock in a hard place because I think backtracking if you have money in an account and it is not making you money you need to do something right now so whether that is investing or whether that is putting it in a

you know high interest savings account or a term deposit like we do not in this house we do not have money that does not make us money full stop end of story if you've got savings and they're not working for you you're doing something wrong in saying that yes it is a really big goal to purchase a house it is a really big overhead here in Australia if you do a PhD it usually takes anywhere between three and five years to complete a PhD and from my research a PhD like you get paid a stipend to do your PhD and that is paid to you because they assume that you're working so hard that you can't maintain any other type of employment during this research period. That amount of money, which is tax free, is anywhere between $33,000 and $37,000. That is not a lot

of money. And you're telling me, oh, I want to get a mortgage in this economy and pay it off with that income. I feel like you might be setting yourself up for some serious, significant financial pressure. And when you're doing a PhD, I'm assuming that's the last thing you want. It doesn't mean you can't invest for, you know, the next five, 10 years and then buy a house later down the track. I know that there seems to be a lot of pressure on especially young people at the moment to get into the market as soon as possible. But the right time for you to get into the market is actually when it works for you, not when the market is quite good because nobody can time the market. So yes, Jess, great suggestion. Go listen to that episode. But then also,

how do we make decisions if we're like, oh, I don't know what I want. I need you to like zoom out and look at your lifestyle, your goals. What do you actually want to achieve? What's the purpose of purchasing this house? Because you might go, well, V, I want to purchase this house while I have a full-time income and I'm, you know, slaying it financially. I then want to rent it out for that period of time because I've already worked out what the rental yield on that property would be. You might already have all your numbers and go, well, V, actually that rental yield would cover my mortgage repayments. And I'd go rent in a share house and keep my living costs really low while doing a PhD so that I'm not financially stressed. Different story. But I don't know your

situation well enough to be able to advise on that. And the only person, unfortunately, that can answer the question of should I buy a house or should I invest is you. And the only way that you're going to be able to answer that question is to deeply understand your values, your priority is what you want to achieve, but then take the pressure off timing. Like we don't need to time the market. It's like people saying, when should I invest? Is it a good time now? Honestly, anytime is a good time. Just get in. When it comes to purchasing a house though, different story because is anytime a good time? Well, no, if you're going to be financially hamstrung or really stressed, or you're like making that situation that puts you behind,

is paying off your mortgage during that period of time going to mean that you can't put food on the table that's a completely different conversation so I think that there's a lot let's just go back to recommending those podcast episodes Jess and we'll make sure that they're in the show notes for you so you can just click them and go but for me it would be about sorry understanding your values what you want to achieve and what life looks like while being really realistic about what doing a PhD is going to look like there you go we got a juicy DM this week I'm glad you asked I thought you'd never ask Jessica I mean it's about Hamilton so this week's dm hey she's on the money i'm really torn and need your help working through

a big family career change my partner's just been offered an incredible job opportunity that's life changing but it's in a big town over an hour away from where we currently live in the city we have two kids i work full-time and if we stay here i take on a lot more of the load to cover the commute and i would have to do the big commute one day a week the job would likely only be for a couple of years so i'm not sure if we should move to that town it would mean moving away from family support and our kids having to change school my husband wants to stay but i think the move makes more sense i never really changed schools as a kid is it really that bad what would you guys do you go you go is it just me like jess you drive over an hour to work well that's not

But my first thought when – and I – You're not like, oh, I need to move to Richmond. No. And I know that I'm like I guess a bit of the anomaly into – actually, no, one of the other girls on the team lives quite close to me. Like an hour to work is like a bare minimum for me. My dad did that for years when I was growing up. Yeah, I grew up in the suburbs.

Like that – an hour commute to me is honestly nothing. Like to me that's just – Under an hour? Oh, that's quick. Yeah, literally I had a good run to be 45 minutes dream. so to me when you said it's an hour away but I don't want to disregard the fact that you said that that would mean you taking on a lot of the additional yeah mental load I feel like maybe that's where it's coming from because the commute itself an hour from someone who makes it it's

neither here nor there you just build it and I'm not saying that it's super fun but you do just build it into your day definitely and I understand that that means perhaps that's two hours a day less help that you would get from your partner but hopefully the finances make up for it right Because otherwise it's not a good decision to take that job. Yeah. I think that if I was you, I would be weighing up the pros and cons. Like I know it sounds really silly. Have you done a pros and cons list?

Obviously a con is you would be taking on more work. But what does that work look like specifically? Because typically in my mind, that would mean in the morning, you're probably doing school, drop off by yourself, lunch boxes, all that sort of stuff. And in the evening, you're doing dinner prep, maybe bath time, depending on the kid's age, that sort of stuff by yourself.

a lot of people do within their partnership do that because it's I think like that kind of commute is actually quite common like a lot of people have to travel to get to work is it yeah there's going to be so many people listening to this going I'm listening to the she's on the money podcast because I'm always in the car for an hour yeah yeah genuinely like is the whatever the work looks like I'm basing that on like a you know a lot of assumptions whatever you're believing you'll take on is it manageable for you and if it is manageable for you are there things that you can pass off to your partner you know when they're home on the weekends they pick up some more of the housework so that you're not doing that you know yeah can you get a robot vacuum so you don't

vacuum in the evenings because now you've got a bit more cash like are there things you can do to kind of counterbalance it because I mean I personally wouldn't move for something that's only an hour away that's how I feel like you're uprooting your house I'm thinking about property you said you're moving away from your family support which I think is probably important with kids very important I never moved to school so I can't really comment on that but did you move schools have you said that I did move schools I feel like I remember you talking about that I did move schools we did move a fair bit um I moved schools and then moved back to the same school yeah moving schools I think it depends what age you are I moved schools three times did you I

don't know yeah crazy hey it depends on so many things like if your friend if your children have so many friends and like they really like their classes they really like the teachers they have a really good community there then it's like oh yeah don't do that but then I mean unless if you can avoid it but if you can't avoid it then they'll they'll be fine like it's actually I'm sure it does help with their resilience and like social skills and learning to connect with different walks of life and like different people different brains different all these things you know what I mean so it is beneficial in some way but yeah if you can avoid it cool if not cool if it's like really really hard to get there like because an hour in a car cool an hour anywhere in a car fine

an hour to I know it's not an hour to Ballarat but say it is it's like god that's like probably 20 buses you know what I mean like what is what does the commute look like maybe that is actually really really tricky which is so fair but I'm also thinking like the commute currently if it took me an hour to get here that's only 26 more minutes than usual you know what I mean and it's like god an hour that's no I'm not going to do that but it's like only a little bit more than what I'm doing right now so it's like just add that much time or is it like to feel really really crazy because hearing it or seeing it in that way is like it feels like too much to bear but like I think that you worked locally and works 15 minutes away yeah it's like an extra 45 minutes

but it's like you think of it as an hour and you're like my god that's crazy so maybe like frame it that way I don't know um but I yeah I would also say like if it is temporary or potentially, just like, whatever. Nothing's permanent. Talking about this, I just feel like, you know, you wrote in, you said it was a life changing job opportunity, right? So I'm assuming that that means significant financial remuneration in comparison to what you currently have. And, you know, if it's only going to be short lived, like, can we not have the mindset of, yeah, it's going to be hard. Like, I'm not trying to make this sound easier, but like, for the next few years, we're going to lock in. We are going to do this. You know, my compromise

is that I'm going to have to spend more time at home because my husband's going to go out, make a big bank. But we've got this cashflow plan that means that in the three years that he's going to, you know, have this job, we are going to be in such a better financial situation that we're on the same page about it being worth it. And like Jess, you said before, like, you know, if you have a bit more free money, you could buy like a robot vacuum. In my head, I was like, okay, cool. Let's say that my husband gets this job opportunity of a lifetime, which is what you're saying it is. And he's going to earn double what he's currently earning. I don't think it would be beyond the scope of what's reasonable to go. Okay, cool. Yeah. We are maybe financially a

little bit pressed, but let's spend 150 bucks a week on a cleaner that comes in every week, maybe every Friday so that you're not spending any time on the weekends cleaning. Like, yes, you might do the day-to-day stuff, but like someone comes in and I'm trying to sell you on this. They do your bathrooms. They, you know, change the sheets of the kids' beds. They change your bed. They do the whole hog, right? Maybe you find someone who's a bit cheaper because they take cash. Like just find what works for you, but that might be an investment in your mental health. So you don't have to do any of that. Then when the weekend comes and your husband is home, you're spending really good quality family time together, but you're not trying to find time during the week

either to do the sheets and linen. And like, maybe you're like, oh my goodness, the bathroom hasn't been touched in weeks. And that can genuinely weigh quite heavily on you mentally. So I feel like what compromises could you be making? Like, and this again is probably me talking, you've got more cashflow, you're financially a little bit more comfortable instead of having to do the grocery shopping every single week. Are we looking at a food delivery service like Marley's Spoon where you can have dinner four nights a week, it's in the fridge, it's ready to cook. So you just do school pickup, come home and start prepping dinner. There's no like that overwhelming, oh my goodness, I don't know what I'm going to cook for dinner. I have to go to the

supermarket. That like mad rush, like you're running around like a chicken without a head after school. Like what can we do to set ourselves up for success? Because I'm kind of, I'm on the same team. I just think that if it's an hour away, we don't need to uproot our whole lives, especially if your family is there, we're not moving away from them. But what things could we spend a bit of money on so that it feels really comfortable during that period of time? Or are we just trying to change our mindset so that we're like, all right, we're locking in for three years. It's going to be a bit of a hard hog, but like, look how much better off we're going to be. And everyone's just on the same page. Yeah. Like what does that look like? What did everyone else say when we

asked that? Oh my goodness. So many opinions. So first thing we asked is if you were our community member, would you stay or move? 53% of you said move. It's more sustainable. Surprising. I mean, sustainability i guess is good but they could catch the train if that's an option potentially public transport and then you can do two things at once if you are like i'm taking more of the mental load no if your partner is taking the train every day they do all the admin on the train i have a friend who lives in ballarat and commutes to the city every day and has negotiated in their contract that they actually get a 9 a.m train because there's less like people on there because it's like a v line which is more of a regional train so you're guaranteed a spot basically

they work for the hour on the train on the way there and they've negotiated with their boss that that's in their working time yes so they leave at 4 p.m and they arrive technically at the office at 10 a.m but they've already done like the two hours so their commute time is actually that's great genius right that's great i think i should be like regional trains have wi-fi and stuff so they're fine but like isn't that smart that's so clever yeah i love it 47 percent of you said you stay and not uproot the kids. I feel like we're all like, just stay. I was surprised with that split. I thought way more of you would say like, stay, but that's okay. Have you or your kids ever had to move school because of a parent's job? 46% said no, we never had to consider it. 30% said

yep, and it was fine. 13% said no, but a parent did the commute and 11% said yes, and it was a struggle. Okay, interesting spread. I moved schools three times. How did you find it? I think because it was relatively early primary school. It wasn't as dramatic as it would have been if it was high school. I think in high school, I would have been very upset to lose my friends. But when I was little, like making friends when you're like six, seven, eight is not as hard as teenagers. Yeah. And I mean, we were moving states. So first we were like in Launceston and then we moved to a place called Sisters Beach in Tasmania. And then from Sisters Beach, we moved over to Melbourne and then you know found a primary school there but I do remember my friends from each location

but I don't remember it being super traumatic I think my parents worked really hard to make it as easy as possible or like as exciting as possible yeah and I don't remember being like oh my god like this is the worst decision ever I do remember not wanting to leave the school because I had my little friends but like mom was like oh we'll come back to Tasmania we'll do this or you can keep in touch and I mean my best friend Harriet lived in Tasmania all through school still best friends yeah like that hasn't really changed yeah we then went to the community and we said what is your two cents so first person said smaller towns often have a stronger community for example like sports to keep kids connected next person said my dad was constantly away but we never had to move

in retrospect my mum probably had the hardest time yeah next person said moving a kid in primary schools much easier on them than high school, which is exactly what I said. I moved schools a few times. It was absolutely fine. An unhappy marriage and unhappy parents is definitely worse than moving schools. I mean, that's a good point. If it's going to weigh heavily on you, then that's something you've got to consider too. Yeah. Someone else said, we did it and we're currently doing it. It turned out to be a better lifestyle for us and we ended up staying. Next person said, teacher here a fresh start does wonders for kids they learn to build relationships over time yes that's what you were saying another person said and i'm only going to give you a couple more the commute

has one of the biggest effects on overall happiness which i think is why you know beck you were saying before like what could you do during that time like is there a way that you could make that commute not soul destroying someone else said this was me and i actually ended up asking to change schools over having to commute and then the last person said i'm a former army brat kids very resilient and will make new friends and settle into a new school easily there you go I love that change I've really gone 180 I'm like you reckon I should move yeah because it's like if you're an hour away from your family that's not too far that's true if you're saying that you've got like a lot of family support like and I'm just like making this up in my head at this

point but like if you're saying oh we don't want to be far away from family support like there's nothing like being able to pick up the phone and be like oh hey mom I'm struggling with the kids can you come over and help after school like that's not as possible if you're asking your mom or whatever to drive an hour for that so yeah yeah i don't i feel like you just have to do what jess said have you done a pros and cons list we love a pros and cons list we absolutely do all right well unfortunately that is all we have time for today that is all from us and we hope you have a beautiful weekend and we'll see you bright and early on monday for a money diary bye guys bye

the advice shared on she's on the money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances she's on the money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision if you do choose to buy a financial product read the pds tmd and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs. Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN 321 649 27708 AFSL 451 289.