She's On The Money - FRIDAY DRINKS: Auxiliary Spending

Episode Date: June 3, 2021

Happy Friday cupcakes! Here at the She's On The Money team, we're all in Victoria so we're in lockdown!!! We also need your help with a new idea we're going to get off the ground - if you have ideas of a 'no spend month' or even BETTER than that, slide into our DM's! Love you, and to the other Melbournians, stay safe xoxoOur very own money wizard and fearless leader Victoria Devine has written a book! Click here to order!Love the pod but looking for a more hands-on approach to your money? Look no further. Our budgeting & cash flow masterclass is the tool you need to help overhaul your finances for good. Join Victoria as she steps you through your budgeting and cash flow with all of the smarts and none of the intimidating jargon. Finally, if you're in a money mess and need help untangling the muddle - we've got you sorted - simply record your question and send it through to us at [e-mail] and you may just end up on the podcast! The advice shared on She’s on The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She’s on The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. Victoria Devine is an Authorised Representative of Australia Pacific Funds Management Proprietary Limited ABN 34 132 463 257 - AFSL 339151.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

She's on the money. She's on the money. Hello and welcome to She's on the money, the podcast for millennials who want financial freedom. Welcome to another one of our Friday drinks episodes where we celebrate the money wins and confessions from our She's on the money community because there are always so many great money wins and confessions that are shared every single week in our Facebook group. And the team and I, even though we are in lockdown from home, spend a very big part of our days and weeks

talking about the things that you guys share in our group Slack chat, not the office because we're not there. But this episode is all about celebrating you guys and the successes that you have and having more positive and constructive conversations around money. So let's jump straight into it tony what happened in this week's money diary um so this week's money diary we took to a lovely young lady who um has had a pretty rough go of it she had pretty rough upbringing um her mom introduced her to credit and credit cards quite early in her life um and now is actually has come through all of that and is now killing it um and she said oh i'm a waitress and I do all this stuff. And we were like, oh, okay, where do you work? And then she rattled off the

cost per hour for her to work topless or in a bathing suit. And we realized that she's actually a stripper and she totally owns it. She fully backs her career. Oh, we loved it. We just didn't see it coming. Here I am thinking she's going to be like, yeah, so I work at La Porchetta. And I was like, that is not La Porchetta. And she didn't mention it in her email at all. So it was really, really cool to get a perspective from a job that people don't talk about a lot and I mean definitely has a stigma attached to if you do that job it's because of desperation it's not a choice but our money diarist this week actually expressed over and over that she actually loves what she does and she makes bank while she's doing it as well so but also she was so smart and so delightful

and just one of those people that Tony and I walked away from that interview being like, oh my God, I want to be her friend. She was so nice. But I think it's important to really just point out that, you know, these roles exist and there are lots of women in our Shoes on the Money community, lots of people actually in the community that have roles in the sex work industry. And I even have lots of clients that work in the sex work industry and they are genuinely some of the nicest people you will ever meet because I think they've always been faced with such adversity and so many stereotypes that they are the last people to ever judge you. They're like so wholesome. And I literally love them for that because I just feel like they're the type of people that you

just want to be good friends with and feel like you could tell anything to. And Vee, some of the stories that you have about clients and how successful they are, it's so easy for us to go, oh, you know, what are they doing? And then you're like, well, I'll tell you what they're doing very well for themselves. Yeah, exactly. And I love it. I think as well, it's just about opening up the conversations around those jobs that people don't really know enough about and just have this, you know, disillusioned idea from- Assumptions.

Yeah, assumptions, watching TV. And our money diarist actually said, you know, when I tell people what I do, they just assume I'm a drug addict, but I'm not that person. And I really hope that people listened to that and that that changed maybe an idea that they had in their head around someone that works in sex work or stripping or exotic dancing because it's so much more than what it seems.

Yeah, exactly. And we were talking about it offline after with our money diarist, and I likened it to the financial services industry in that, yeah, there are some pretty bad stereotypes about our industry. And you're right, there are some really bad eggs, but not everybody in the industry is a bad egg. And it's really mean to then stereotype them based on that experience or that assumption, which is not true. So yeah, we'll move away from here. We're really passionate about it, but it summarized this sex work is real work and we respect it to the end of the earth. And so V, this week's deep dive, how'd we go? So this week's deep dive was a good one. We have tackled the topic before, but you can never tackle navigating finances as a couple

enough times because there is no one size fits all approach. So talking about it this week was just really interesting because there's always different perspectives on how you should manage money with your partner and i think that the outcome of that was there isn't actually a right or a wrong i spoke about how i manage money with my partner and how you know georgia might not manage money in the same way and usually we'd ask georgia you know what happened on the deep dive but this week five people on a zoom would have just been far far too much so tony and ryan well done you made the cut hey v is it fair to say when you say there's no right or wrong answer would your answer also change over time like as your relationship changes you would have to update

how you do it so it's not even finding the right one for you but more finding the right one for you now and then reconsidering every 12 18 months or so yeah absolutely everything changes right and i think that that's a really important point that you bring up because you know i use myself as an example here but you know steve and i never shared finances until we had a mortgage and now we have a mortgage that was kind of a catalyst for us to change that and make a decision based on what was going on there so you know it might be a trigger like having kids or changing something but in saying that doesn't mean you need shared finances you just might find it easy you might love doing that and that's okay but I think there's nothing wrong with never sharing

your finances with your partner as long as you're open and honest about what is in your bank accounts and you're not actually hiding anything or hiding debt or your spending habits from them because that's then completely negative yeah well there's a couple of hundred comments on the post in the facebook group that you posted v and it feels like there's a couple of hundred different ways to go about it that all work well for them so it's actually interesting reading through going oh this works well for us it's completely different for you guys oh we do the complete opposite and we've found this works well for us because of this situation and whatever so just reading through that thread and seeing all the different ways you can get still a really

great result was actually fascinating to see all the different ones in it yeah but what i learned from all of that and I guess the best summary of that is is the key to navigating couples finances is actually communication and talking to your partner about how you feel and talking to your partner about what you want to do versus what they want to do and deeply understanding why they make decisions around money and how they do that and I think that that's where we should all start not oh hey I read in the Facebook group that someone does it this way and they say it works and because we're the same age we should do that like that's absolutely not the case talk to your partner what are they comfortable with what are you comfortable with it's actually nobody else's business how you

manage money with your partner yeah so stop asking ryan all right ryan i think it is time to get into your ryan's community money wins yeah there's a slight twist on the money wins this week no no twist no twist jasmine posted in the group what are your best savings hacks which i guess a good saving hack is a money win still right that still counts right that might be better so you have your favorite from that thread instead this week yeah i have and there's a little side game to play as we go through i want to know if i want to know if any of us feel attacked with any of the specific hacks and you'll know what i mean when we get to them okay all right number one this is from nomsa she says just because something is on special doesn't mean you are saving

yeah amen that's aggressive i definitely agree with that one it's a way that i convince myself i need things so i feel attacked not that attached though i definitely do that because i go like oh my god this thing that's normally two thousand dollars is fifteen hundred dollars and my boyfriend torbs goes yeah but do you want to spend fifteen hundred dollars anyway i'm like you're so smart no no i don't who taught him finances he's a genius jessica says my savings hack is to never step foot inside a kmart and that got a lot of likes that's a very good point that's a good hack i've actually recently started and i don't know if this is a good or bad thing but i've had to start muting and unfollowing brand instagram pages that i

really like because whenever they post I really like their aesthetic and their vibe and things like that and I just find that I buy so much stuff and I can't even blame it on sponsored advertising because I'm putting it into my own feed so I'm like okay I've got to take it out I'm doing this to myself I'm zucking myself because I'm literally putting yes I'm putting it into my own eyeline so I've had to start unfollowing and muting all these accounts that's my hack oh good hack Tony Maddie's hack, and this is straight at me, eat the food you have in your own house before you go and buy takeaway food.

Okay, Maddie, nobody asked. Nobody asked for that specific tip, but my Uber Eats orders, especially over the last week, would say that I don't have food at home when that is not true. Yeah, aren't you having Provador tonight for dinner? I am actually having Provador for dinner tonight. I felt like for a little bit of context, our whole She's on the Money team is based in Melbourne and all of us are in lockdown right now.

And this week's been a bit challenging for me. And so yesterday I decided that I would order a fancy dinner on Provador for my partner and I. And after this recording, guys, we are having date night. Treat yourself. That is cute. That is awesome. Yeah, but it's just, I guess it doesn't even matter that we're having Provador for dinner.

Like that is quite fancy. I think it's like a hundred dollars. And I guess that's my money confession this week, just jumping ahead for a second. But I think it is actually really important while we're in lockdown to just, you know, appreciate food and use that as kind of an event. And if you've got a partner and you're at home or you've got some housemates, instead of just eating dinner, like go and sit at the table and have a conversation and get a deck of cards out or get a board game out and kind of make an evening of it.

Because, you know, lockdown is really hard on us and you might not feel like doing it, But I guarantee you'll feel a lot better having done something instead of just another night eating dinner in front of the TV on the couch. And I just think that, you know, regardless of what you're eating, even if you're having like honey sandwiches for dinner, like just get up and eat it somewhere different in your house and just kind of make a vibe of it. That's a really good idea. Speaking of feeling attacked, Victoria saying to eat dinner at the actual table is one of the most aggressive things I've ever heard. I know. That's like your mum yelling at you to clean your room because dinner's ready.

Like we're coming out and you were eating dinner as a family. Fine, we'll do it. Your mum always called you out for dinner before it was actually ready. She'd like pull you out of the room and be like, hey, Victoria, dinner's ready, and you'd like run down thinking dinner was ready. In the actual fact, she wanted you to set the table. What?

Maybe that was just you, Victoria, because she knew you were always late. Oh. So true. oh today on attacking victoria wow yeah okay sorry let's push on and attack some other people instead hey uh barbara said this is actually really impressive barbara said my goal in 2021 was to not buy work lunches and so far five months in i haven't bought a single lunch i've food prepped and i've planned ahead and i've had leftovers from last night's dinner not a single lunch this year barbara what a savings hack that is

Barbara. That's impressive. Do you know what? You know how we were attacking people on this episode? Hey, Ryan, remember how you said you weren't going to buy a takeaway coffee? So coming up next, we've got a money. Actually, you can see me on the screen now. What am I holding?

Yeah, a takeaway coffee. A takeaway coffee cup. Yep. Yep. Guilty as charged. Are you still investing your $5 a day or whatever? I am. It goes into Spaceship Steel.

Well done. Thank you. I'll take it. Yes, it's a win. agree so you're buying a coffee and saving the money gosh unrelatable content doing pretty good um moira says every few months i go with my mom to costco and that has saved us a fortune since we've started doing it it's we we put it in the calendar so it's like yep once we go yep in five weeks we'll go again on a sunday we get one of those big trolleys and she gets like big chickens

for the family and big because it's costco is all kind of bulk buy right yeah and she said the amount of money we've saved uh is awesome but she said it's also even though it's a big day the one day we do it then it's done for the month it's all in the freezer good to go we've saved a heap of time and a heap of money i've got a question earlier we said should we just buy things because they're cheap no that's what i would do if i went to costco i don't need a coffin but they sell them there so i would buy one like i'd be like oh just in case like i just if i went to Costco I'm gonna buy a hundred of those dollar hot dogs out the front and I don't need those hot dogs I am that person Tony last time I went I ended up buying a one kilo tub of peanut butter

filled pretzels like I didn't need that but I saw it and I needed it and you're like wow it's such good value it'd be rude not to and then you end up with a kilo's worth of pretzels a coffin and 10 dog kennels i don't need all this money not to buy it they also have really good socks so i always buy the socks but i don't need those you're like i've saved so much money i've basically made money and that's just not how it works it isn't how it works but i think that maybe costco is for people who have a little more self-restraint than we do tony the final savings hack is from carmella who like a lot of us lockdown is helping her save and she said because now i don't get white girl wasted every single weekend and waste money on designer shears that i like to wear to the clubs

so the the drinks and the clothes is saving me a fortune well i'm very proud yeah that's a great hack that required a lot of saving but also arguably a lot of self-reflection as well all right now we are back but before we get into money wins and confessions tony there was a very interesting post in our facebook group recently about no spend may what was going on with that so someone in our community posted about the idea of doing a no spend may and before you say oh my god so how are you going to live and pay rent and eat and all those things i'm pretty sure that what it boiled down to was that your bills and your rent and your utilities and all of those things can be paid for but no auxiliary spending like buying your lunch for at work like auxiliary

auxiliary spending that's an interesting way of putting it oh is that i don't think i've never used that term it sounds fancy let's continue using that yeah should we say that should that be the buzzword of the day smart oh well i am really spending this week tony i think that should be the title of the episode purely because i'd click on it to be like what the hell is that well hang on should i google it and make sure it actually means what i think it means before no no no it's like absolutely not because it's actually better if you're wrong okay great well that's fine we'll leave it we'll leave it in um basically yeah so it doesn't include any of your bills or anything it's just everything else like not going out and buying coffee not buying clothes

or makeup or sports equipment that you don't need or whatever and i looked at it and i thought that would be easy right because you're like oh i could not buy clothes for a month it's not so as we're recording this may's just finished halfway through may one of the girls that was participating in no spend may inside of our group so a few hundred people ended up joining our original poster and taking on this no spend may halfway through the month oh cool how awesome is that that they all get together and have their little challenges and it makes me feel bad because i'm like oh maybe we should have done something for that and if you guys have any ideas on what challenges that she's on the money team can put together for you or things you want created like we are all ears

slide into our dms with your ideas because tony and i want to do more interesting stuff well i reckon we could maybe get an idea out of this but so halfway through on the 15th of may bridget posted um how is everyone going with their no spend may and so she was halfway through and i can't believe this so inside up bank it categorizes your spending um into good life which is your auxiliary spending and house which is rent and then it comes down to bills which is like all your utilities and stuff it breaks everything down into four categories her good life spending the month before was 1836 dollars which includes like dinners out and going out for drinks and all of those things halfway through may in her no spend may in her good life account 106 dollars

isn't that amazing like 1700 in advance and that potentially like does that mean she's saving that much well i hope so i hope it means that she's put that money away 1700 in a month what that's I mean it's not sustainable every month because we have to because you know we have to enjoy ourselves and treat ourselves and it's like if you're on a really restrictive diet you like really want an ice cream you can't not eat ice cream forever because why would you yeah I mean let's get serious yeah and you end up binging so like if you stick to something like this for the long term you'll end up blowing out and having like a massive blowout of spending and it's just not fun or nice but i think these challenges where it's short term and you're just achieving

a short-term goal that makes you feel really good like why can't we do that every couple of months and go you know what this month i am being really restrictive because i'm gonna make bank yeah or you know that's like a really good a bit of little cash for if you're saving for something or say you really really want to buy a gucci handbag you're like oh my god i want to save for that so i'm not going to go out to eat all month like pretty amazing um Catherine said I adopted a puppy so not going very well with lots of photos of a miniature dachshund which was quite cute and Amelia posted a screenshot of her bank account as well and said not great but better than last month her um cash out for the whole of April was $5,096 and her cash out for the first half

of May was $1,694. Oh, I love the sentence. That's still huge, yeah. So, pretty good. But, like, those are big numbers. Like, I thought you were going to have an example of people being like, yep, she spent, like, you know, $600 on going out and, you know, discretionary spending and then she spent $50.

Like, those are massive. Thank you so much to our community for sharing stuff like that too because, you know, it's special that they're going to share literal numbers numbers with our community about what they're spending and what they're saving. But how motivating is it when people aren't just like, yeah, I'm doing well on my challenge, but they're actually like, check out this screenshot of how much I've saved. You're like, oh my God, that's amazing. I'm going to try and do the same thing. It's the numbers that really make it tangible and really make it extra motivating. It's so motivating as well, isn't it?

Yeah, exactly. You see those numbers and you're like, oh, here we go. I'm so pumped for this. Yeah, absolutely. It's kind of the retrospective opposite of sitting down with a highlighter, looking at your bank accounts like you say to do V is kind of like oh I didn't spend that money it's actually in my account and I can see it and it makes you feel really good and there was heaps of people commenting saying that they'd saved money or it wasn't going really well but they made a bit of a difference and that's all that you know these things are just like little challenges that you can do but I think it would be really fun if we could do one like and everybody could

join in yeah i think so too so if anybody's got any ideas please tag us or slide into our dms and let us know i think i've got an idea what is it let's do no save september where we all just blow all of our cash no we're not no we can't do that because two years ago in the community i don't think you've met the brief go back to the drawing board in 2019 i actually did a challenge with the community when you guys definitely weren't nearly as big but i did savings september and i had a really cute like chart that you could i do remember this yeah that was great yeah you're trying to suggest the exact opposite what if we if we did like a no spend month uh which could be september or otherwise but

if v i'm sure with your xl or someone's skills everyone entered the amount of money they save so then as a community we could be at the end of the month like we have saved collectively one million dollars or something as a group like that oh my gosh yes we can totally do that i can set up a google spreadsheet where you guys can just add your number to a form and it will automatically update the spreadsheet oh i'm gonna work on this oh my god i'm so excited i shouldn't have mentioned it we've distracted v we won't see her for another few weeks because she'll be working on the spreadsheet i'm so excited about this can we end the podcast here or do we have to do our wins and confessions because i really want to talk about this you have to do your wins

and confessions tony's just so pumped to talk about the savings of a million dollars yeah i want to save a million dollars before we go tony we do want to go through our money wins or confessions so let's fly through those before i jump back into google spreadsheets tony what was your money win or confession this week i've got a confession oh no but also what is it so like we said at the beginning of our podcast we're in lockdown at the moment here in melbourne which has made everything feel really hard and you know the emotions compound and it just you know you want to buy yourself nice things so i've done the the opposite of no spent may and i've just been buying lots of dumb things that make me feel good that it's not real but it's just nice and i'm just

I don't want anybody else to feel bad that's doing this but I've definitely been dipping into the old account to buy makeup that I can't wear at the moment because we're in lockdown yeah but if you've got if it makes you feel good I think that just lockdown is genuinely so mentally taxing and so hard and you know if you're in a state that hasn't experienced this you are so lucky but it is such a drainer and Tony you and I were actually talking about this yesterday and I said, oh, the afternoons are worse. They are. It's as though you can get up in the morning and start the morning off

and then the afternoons just feel really flat and, yeah, not so nice. Yeah, so it's just, it's a hard place to be in and, you know, we are so lucky that we are in a position where, you know, we're clearly still working but, you know, I guess our hearts go out to you because it is so challenging and so hard but staying home is putting everybody else in a better situation and I guess that's something that's been really helpful to me over the past couple of days and that's just you know knowing that if my part to play in this whole global pandemic is staying home

as much as possible in the comfort of my own home then I am literally an indecently lucky person who owes literally everything to all of the people that are working on the front lines of this and you know I think that's the least we can do as much as it is really challenging. and just add to what you're both saying so um i work at the radio station kiss right and we're doing a thing at the moment where we're like paying people's debts and stuff like that and yeah i reckon 90 of the people i've spoken to this week in the stations only in melbourne everyone said the same thing oh i've just been buying stuff online it makes me feel a bit better i just don't know it just gives me something to look forward to because this thing's going to

arrive and every single person sounds a little bit sheepish and that they feel like they're the only one doing this silly thing. And I tell all of them, no, 90% of the people I speak to is doing the exact same thing. So if you're feeling a bit guilty for some online purchases stuck at home in Melbourne, the one thing you get to do each day is go to the front door and get something that arrives. Just know that you're not the only one. In fact, you're in the huge majority there. So if that makes you feel a bit better about it, just know that. Thank you. And I hope that that makes other people feel better as well because it's a really hard time. So anyway, Ryan, do you have a money win or confession? I don't know if this is a win or confession. I thought it was

a win, but after we did those savings hacks earlier where a few people mentioned just because it's on special doesn't mean you're winning. I don't know where I stand anymore. Look, my money win or confession is going to be similar so what's yours yeah well just overall i've spent a little bit less money but i got a notification from uber eats during the week and it was like this double payday double double day day day yeah i'm yeah and that came through and it's essentially whatever you it's like two for the price is one essentially and i got home and i was like hey bridge have a look at this and she's like what so we have to in inverted commas i'm like oh it's a saving we're saving money it'd be cost us money not to get takeaway

And supporting small business, you ordered from a local business. I did order from a local business. I am, you know, it is a win for everyone. You're a hero, Ryan. I'm going back to being a winner. I'm just supporting local business. What a hero. Thank you.

Appreciate it. Here I am for society. All right, V, take us home. What do we got? So I have made a purchase this week that was kind of impulse. Working from home, my house is quite cold and I really wanted a new pair of Ugg boots. So I bought Ugg boots and they're not the cheapest thing in the world.

Like good Ugg boots are a little bit spino and I was willing to do it. They are. You can feel the difference though, right? You can. The quality of the real original Ugg. You absolutely can and they are arguably the most Victoria Divine pair of Ugg boots you've seen in your life. For anybody that can't see Victoria, which is every single person in the world except for Ryan and I, they are a pink fluffy Ugg boot with a pink bow on the back.

Yeah, they are the most Victoria Devine pair of Ugg boots you've ever seen. But that's beside the point. You know what I was going to say, V? I was like, a pair of Ugg boots in your shoe cupboard that I have walked into, I was like, I don't know if they would look the part, but now that I've seen them, they actually suit the rest

of your shoe cupboard, so your shoe room. Thank you, thank you. I'm here all day. But I did end up saving like $80 on them because it turns out I'm probably the only person who does want pink Ugg boots. to the other normal colors they were on sale tony's lost which is money win for me guys tony are you okay i can't believe i can't believe no one else wanted to purchase those pink

with a pink bum on them it's so weird no but you know what they're gonna sell out now now that we've talked about them they are really cute guys of all the brands we've worked with This is going to be the one we're like, oh, my God, Victoria, she's the pink Ugg boot girl. Yep. We're not even working with them. Well, we should be. In Australia, if you want to reach out.

We'll put a picture of the Ugg boots up on our Instagram because they're just, they're very Victoria Devine. I love it. They are delightful. You're nothing if not consistent to your brand. Yeah. Don't say I'm not consistent, guys. I'm committed to the course.

I'm very committed. All right. I think that is all we have time for today. But just before we head off, we'd like to acknowledge and pay respect to Australia's Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples. They're the traditional custodians of the lands, the waterways and the skies all across Australia. We thank you for sharing and for caring for the land on which we are able to learn. We pay our respects to elders past and present and we share our friendship and our kindness. The advice

shared on She's on the Money is generally nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. And we promise that Victoria Devine is an authorised representative of Australia Pacific Funds Management, Proprietary Limited, ABN 34132463257, AFSL 339151. And if you've enjoyed this podcast, let us know by leaving a review or send us a DM on Insta, leave us a comment.

We love to hear your feedback and your thoughts on the episode. And, of course, if you're not in the Facebook group, a lot of the stuff we talk about in Friday Drinks comes from the Facebook group. So we'd love to hear your thoughts. Just search for the She's On The Money Facebook community and join the 170,000, are we? Is that about where we're at at the moment?

We've just surpassed it, which is wild. Well, come and join the party. Oh, my God, that sounds so lame, but you know what I'm saying. Come and join us and we'd love to see you in there. Thanks for listening, team. Bye. Bye. Thank you.