She's On The Money - Managing Spending Guilt

Episode Date: April 12, 2022

On this episode we unpack the all too common feeling of spending guilt! Is it different to other forms of guilt? Why do we feel it AND what do we do about it? Listen to this episode to find out more on the prevalence and purpose of this particularly icky, but entirely manageable experience!The advice shared on She’s on The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She’s on The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. Victoria Devine is an Authorised Representative of Infocus Securities Australia Proprietary Limited ABN 47 097 797 049 AFSL - AFSL 236523.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Just before we get started, we'd like to acknowledge and pay respect to Australia's Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples. They're the traditional custodians of the lands, the waterways and the skies all across Australia. We thank you for sharing and for caring for the land on which we are able to learn. We pay our respects to elders past and present and we share our friendship and our kindness. She's on the money. She's on the money. Hello and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast for millennials who want financial freedom. Over the last few years, we have seen so many of you transform your relationships with money. We've seen prolific spenders become savvy savers. We've seen micro-investors opening

their own share folios, and we've seen afterpay addicts closing their accounts for good. Legends. What we've also noticed, though, is that many of us who have worked so hard to overhaul our finances are now starting to feel a sense of guilt around our spending. Not only is this feeling a drainer, but surprisingly, it can also serve to jeopardize our finances. My name is Georgia King, and joining me to unpack how we can manage spending guilt is financial advisor victoria divine hello v what was the last thing you felt guilty about purchasing my girl are we really doing this was your engagement party quite recently yeah i know you're gonna ask about i know you're gonna ask about it's the shoes isn't it could be the shoes yeah i spent a lot of money

on a pair of shoes i regret nothing good i don't feel guilty interesting because it was in our budget it's one of those things so for those of you playing along at home i bought a very very nice pair of jimmy choo shoes they have pink bows one's on the front one's on the back very sassy very, I felt very me. Like it's basically the blush of She's On The Money, same color. Like I just felt like I needed them, but they were a part of the budget. And what was not a part of the budget was a headband. And I really wanted a headband, but I wasn't going to spend thousands of dollars on the one that I actually wanted. So I just crafted it myself, G King, with a sassy little $3 clearance Kmart headband. And I hand stitched some pearls onto it from a necklace I

bought from diva in circa 2010 stop it it worked well and well it looked impressive we were talking before the show and apparently you got lots of dms about where you i have found this no but i made it guys but it's all about balance and it's all about purchasing in line with your values and it's not something that i do all the time going and buying a pair of designer shoes and you know what i don't even know if that's the most relatable example but i wanted to give it because it's a real one from my life and it's just one of those things that it made me feel special i have worked my hardest over the last couple of years. And you know what? I feel like I deserve to feel really nice. And so do you guys. It's not necessarily about achievement. It's not about having to mark

very important things with big purchases. It's more about looking after yourself and knowing that self-care is really important and it does actually stretch into our finances. But we're going to break down exactly why you might be feeling guilty and how that works and how to overcome it throughout the show, G. Yeah, it's definitely something that I've struggled with in the past. So I am very excited about this show. I feel like you're a frugal little spender. I was. Give us the goss. How'd you get through that? Why did you get through that? In terms of overcoming that feeling of guilt. Yeah, because you used to be so frugal in a good way. Like that's why you have a very healthy savings account. Yes, it is. So it's not a bad habit to have, but feeling guilty

about purchases, that is a bad habit. You know what? I think it is really tied to my personality. I'm someone who like prides myself on my self-discipline, which might be surprising because I feel like on the podcast, I come across as a bit of a goose. No, she's not. You're not a goose. Nobody thinks you're a goose. Well, maybe. That was a very goose-like voice.

But I think it got pretty unhealthy. No, nothing too serious. But yeah, it just, I was not really reaping any reward from how hard I was working. And I just kind of, it kind of clicked for me that you can enjoy the fruits of your labor. What can I last us? Yes. And, you know, also, I probably started earning a little bit more money as well, as I graduate a little further into my career. She's on the money. Correct. Yeah. So I don't

know. I guess that's my little story, but I like that. And I think it's really relatable. And I think a lot of us, especially on our money journeys, we've got our heads in the sand about our spending and then we pull them out and we get our budget together and we get our finances together and we're talking about cashflow and we've done what we think is the best thing for us. But then we start to feel really guilty about looking after ourselves or, you know, a couple of weeks ago we had somebody write in and their money when it was buying jeans and not feeling guilty about it. And I really loved that because you deserve to be looked after as well. Like you're not working this hard for just future you. I think life is about the journey as much as it is

about the destination, which if you've ever met my dad, Eric Devine, he says all the time. And I think it's about, you know, making sure that you're looked after, but also looking after yourself in the interim. Exactly. And that needs to be built into our budgets and our cash flow, because otherwise we end up burnt out or we might end up absolutely blowing it all or not liking the budgeting process or not liking managing money at all because it just consistently stresses you out yeah 100% let's talk about guilty pleasures feed panna chocolate oh panna chocolate and the panna ice cream oh now you can get it on sale for like seven dollars a tub at coles sometimes oh panna ice cream have you tried the banana one yeah the banana the banoffee one is the best one

but you're talking about money guilty pleasure so back on track v we love our panna but do you believe in guilty pleasures as like an idea, as a concept. Absolutely, I do. We all deserve a little pick me up sometimes, whether that is ice cream or financial or it is, you know, looking after ourselves and giving ourselves a little pedicure after a long week at work. Like it doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't have to be expensive or it could be really expensive. Like the time I bought those shoes for my engagement and I regret absolutely nothing about it. Someone asked me if I was going to sell them. I was like, no, they're an achievement to me. I'm probably going to box them like in a clear box and put them in my wardrobe so I look at them every day

because I'm obsessed. But having guilty pleasures is so important because it's again really tied to self-care. So before we keep talking about our guilty pleasures and making them okay, let's actually unpack for a minute what is guilt G. Let's talk about how that works. So when you hurt somebody else, guilt is an absolutely natural and very important emotional response that encourages the repair of valuable relationships and discourages acts that could damage them. So that's kind of nice to know that as humans, that's ingrained in us. I think there are some people who don't have that and that's kind of scary, but that's all right. But what about when you hurt yourself by going against your own standards or your own plans? Guilt is a very

important indicator of this and actually can be super productive if you're paying attention to it and you're looking at what that's trying to tell you. So we're not saying have no guilt ever. Like don't feel guilty over your spending. Like you probably should be experiencing a bit of guilt if you've been budgeting and saving for ages and then you go and blow it on something that wasn't aligned to your values or your goals. But there's probably a reason you've done that. We need to deeply understand that as opposed to crucifying ourselves. And I think we also hold a lot of guilt about our historics, right? So like people often say to me like, oh my gosh, I wish that I had done better or I wish I knew better or I'm so stupid I never did x y and z but I do genuinely

believe that that doesn't help anybody like harboring guilt for past decisions that arguably never hurt anybody except for your financial position like that's past you and they did the best that they could with the tools and the resources they had at the time it's not necessarily about going which I knew better gee I can't believe it I was so dumb you weren't so dumb you just didn't have the tools and resources that you have today and that's fine and we're learning and growing. But when you're spending, it is a cognitive battle of wheels between your emotions and then the rational parts of your brain as the part of the brain that's involved in spending is actually the same part that loves a good dopamine hit, Jay. And like spending, that gives you that

dopamine hit. That's why some people have spending addictions and shopping addictions because it's not actually about the item they're purchasing. It's about the thrill that they experience when they part with some money, which is really traumatic and can be really hard for a lot of people. And I think too often it's trivialized in a way that makes people feel like crap about themselves, Jay. Like the diaries of a shopaholic. Like, cool. Would you have a TV show called The Diaries of an Alcoholic? Yeah, no. No. Like it just makes me feel a bit ick, but that's me because I am so wildly passionate about and cover myself. That sounds weird. I don't cover myself in money, but I definitely surround myself with money conversations. So I feel like I understand it

a bit deeper than the average bear. So do you not go home and have baths in cash? I don't. I thought that's what you did. It's actually, yeah, no, no, no. I just like use it as the, like the washcloth in the shower. Yeah. Oh, gorgeous. Gorgeous. I want to give you some stats. I love stats, girl. She's emerging. It's been a while. I wanted to take a look at the money that Australians have and are allocating. So according to the ABS in 2021, the average household spends $1,425 per week on essential and non-essential living expenses, with the top expenses being housing costs at $279, makes sense, food and non-alcoholic beverages, $237 that comes in at, transport is then $207 and recreation is $172. Are we showing you what they were doing

for recreation. Yeah. Well, I guess that's, you know, catching up at the bar for a little bevy. Yeah. All right. I feel like I don't have enough hobbies. I feel like I need more recreation in my life. I just work, you know, you meet them at parties. They're like, what do you do? And you kind of go, I don't really want to tell them what I do for work, but they're like, what do you do for fun? And you're like, I don't really know. Work is fun. Work is really fun. Let's look at low income households now. So they dedicate a relatively higher portion of their spending to housing. Which makes sense because housing is expensive. Exactly. Food and non-alcoholic beverages come in at 19%. Domestic fuel and power is then 5%. And that's compared to high income

households, which are 18%, 14% and 2% respectively. Wow. That's quite interesting. I feel like it's super interesting, but I also think that we need to realize that spending money is necessary to live in our world. We shouldn't feel guilty about spending at all. And it's not like you're listening to this episode for me to give you permission and go, all right, G, don't feel guilty anymore about spending money. It's more about going, well, why do you feel guilty? How does this work? Can we break this down a little bit more? Because from my perspective, spending around guilt comes from a couple of places. It could be ingrained in your money story. You could have had a money story where you feel really guilty because you grew up maybe in poverty and

now you're absolutely thriving and you just feel really awful about the fact that, you know, your parents couldn't do what you get to do today. And that can lead to some guilt, which I genuinely think you should get some therapy for. Genuinely, there is nothing better than therapy. And I'm sure that basically everybody in the She's On The Money team is going to tell you that. But it's one of those things where it could be so ingrained in your money story that you didn't even know that that's where it was coming from. It could be the flip side where you just feel out of control and therefore guilty because you're like, oh my gosh, I just bought this new skirt and I think I have rent or I think I have a bill coming up because you're not clear on your budget or your cash flow

or what's coming up. Where in reality, a budget should actually be a tool that empowers us. It shouldn't be a tool where it limits us and goes, all right, Jay, so we've done your budget, 70 bucks a week on groceries, done. Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am. Like that is not how it works. It's actually about truly understanding how much money is coming into your account and how much leaves it and for what. It's not about judging ourselves on those splits. And that's actually why in my book and in everything that we have spoken about historically, it's really about your money. It's not about percentages. And I know that other advisors historically have always said, oh, spend, you know, 30% on this and 20% on this and save 10%. Like, I just don't think that works

for anybody. And the stats you just shared were really reflective of that because you look at people who are on lower incomes and of course they are going to spend a higher percentage of their income on housing because housing is really expensive. But if you are making bank and decide to live in, you know, a cheaper house, you can spend like 5% on rent. So I think it's really unfair to set similar standards or similar percentage points for people because if you're on a $40,000 income, that split is going to be very significantly different to someone who's owning $400,000. It's so important to contextualize that, but also give yourself permission to spend on yourself and go, all right, well, regardless of whether I'm a low income earner or a high

income earner, I still deserve something for me if it's in budget. And I mean, this is a very privileged position to be in. Like you might feel really guilty because you're living off benefits and you have two kids to feed and you just don't have the capacity to save. And I'm very, very aware that that is a situation that exists in our country. It's not to say that you should feel guilty about spending. Like I just want you as well to be empowered about the decisions you're making around money. It's not to say, oh my gosh, well, you should be saving instead. That's not it at all. It's about relieving the guilt you feel when you make a transaction. And sometimes people feel guilty around their energy bill. Like that's a hygiene factor, G. We have to pay our energy

bill. And others are just feeling guilty when they spent an extra couple of dollars on a latte once a week. I think we really need to give ourselves permission to live the lives we want to because you freaking deserve to. 100%. But in saying that as well, don't just put it all on afterpay and worry about it later. Yeah, it's a balance. It's spending the money you have. We're not talking about going into debt. Like that's another story. Yes. Are you really trying to make me rant? Oh, triggered. Let's stay on track. How prevalent is guilt around spending? I know we see it in the community all the time. We do. So like anecdotally, we see it really often. Yes. We've seen it so often, G, we did a whole episode on it. You're welcome. But a study done in 2018

actually revealed that 72% of Australians, G, had guilt when spending and 22% of those experienced that feeling regularly. How awful. Interesting. 72% of our community feel guilt when spending and then 22% of that group, they feel that consistently. That's a really big number of people, G. Massive. That's really sad. I didn't expect it to be that large, actually. No, I thought that like maybe like 30% of people felt guilty, but like 72% is massive. And then further to that, an American study done in 2019 by a leading crowdsource shopping platform commissioned a survey of 2000 Americans. And that revealed that more than half of Americans say they feel guilty about spending money. That kind of makes sense. But Australia, we feel even more guilty.

There's also a difference in gender, right? Of course there is. There's always a difference in gender, 22% of our Australian respondents, they actually refrain from buying things that they couldn't afford. And females actually three times more likely than a male to feel guilty around their spending habits. Goat figure, G King. It's not surprising, is it? No. What do you put that down to though? Just our general like anxiety about existing. Yeah. Yeah. I think the general pressure on us to exist and be profitable and fruitful and all of those other things. Like I just think that the pressure on women is so much more significant than it is on men and I mean I could rant about how the entire world was made for men here like from the way our

bank accounts work to medications and testing all the way through to the way that jobs work like the world was basically made for men and then as women we came in and had to slot into the way that they work and I say this not just because I'm like oh we have to slot into a man's world but there is literally scientific research that says that men actually exist on a 24-hour circadian cycle. So they have hormones in their body, same way as we do, but their hormones peak in the morning. And then all throughout the day, they dwindle and they get tired and they go back and they are literally most productive between 9 and 5 p.m. Go figure. But then women, our cycle goes for 28 days. And there are different times at which we have different hormones running through

our bodies based on how our bodies work. So literally the 9 to 5 grind doesn't work for women, but we've slotted into it anyway. So I feel like we are already uncomfortable with the way we generate income and do life. So I'm genuinely not surprised that women are feeling worse about this because we just feel worse about the way everything works, really. That's interesting. It's super pervy, isn't it? You're like, what? So, you know, I feel like there's almost a perception that the interests of women are more frivolous. So we might spend money on like makeup and prettier dresses and stuff like that,

Whereas men, I don't know what they're buying. Soccer balls? Is that where my mind went? Yeah, I mean, that's what my partner does. Soccer balls, golf balls, golf outfits recently. Golf kits. We love golf kits. So do you think there is then this idea that our interests are silly, so we should feel guilty for spending our money on such silly little things, little girly things? Like, is there any truth in that, do you think? Absolutely not. Because as much as that's ingrained in us, and obviously we are very much of the opinion that you should only ever do things that make you hubby it's not for other people but like those things were made to please men like there

were handbooks on how we should behave and how we should apply makeup before our husbands came home in the 1950s like these things are basically to appease men like and i don't dress for men i dress to impress other women otherwise i wouldn't have bought expensive shoes you know because no man that i am aware of that is straight is ever going to be like oh v god's shoes love the double bow I love the double bow. Who designed those? I mean, all my gay friends, they were like, oh my God, girl, I love them. Yeah, they're like, literally, they all knew. But it's one of those things where I think that it's ingrained in us, but we really need to distill down why it's ingrained in us and whether that actually makes us happy. And is it such a bad thing to

be spending money on things that make us happy and more productive and makes us feel good to go to work? Like, no, it's the cost of being alive. Interesting. I love where this episode it is going. It's become quite the feminist little rant and that's what we're about here at She's on the Money. That is very unlike me. Unlike us. I think for now we'll go to a little break and then we'll jump back on the other side. Victoria Devine, what causes guilt and what do you think that tells us about ourselves and like human psychology? You have a background in psych, talk us through it. Oh, look, I'm not a practicing psych. Can you imagine if I was? You'd be good at it. I'd be the worst. I'd just go on rants. Like, I just don't know how someone

who has such strong opinions like I do would ever be a really, really good psychologist because like can you imagine I'd be sitting in like a therapy session with someone and they'd be telling me about their shitty partner and I'd be like, all right, Georgia, you just leave. You just gotta leave. Like I would not be a helpful therapist. Maybe that's helpful though. Oh no, that is definitely against the ethics. I would have been kicked out of the industry. That's why I ended up in finance because they're all dodgy here, right? But yeah, guilt. Again, we covered this at the start, but it's really good to recap. It's a symptom of inaction or not being in control. And most of us, especially women, love to feel like we are in control. So it's really about

understanding our money story and where that's coming from and why we might feel that way. And a money story isn't necessarily just how you grew up around money. It could be, gee, you're just feeling really guilty because you got a pay rise and it's a really nice pay rise, but you haven't done anything with it. You've just started spending some money and then you, you know, looked at your bank account at the end of the month and you're like, wow, like I already spent everything that I earned in addition to what I used to. And you're feeling a bit of guilt about that. So I don't think it's always a really, really bad thing. But I think if you are feeling guilt around money, we actually need to sit down and have a chat. You and I need

to go through your budget and through your cash flow and go, why are you feeling like this? And are the purchases you are making reasonable or not? Because sometimes they are going to be more than reasonable and you should have absolutely no guilt about them at all. Like you need a new pair of jeans or you need to buy a new pair of shoes for work and this is like a reminder to all of my nurse friends who haven't bought new shoes for work that they keep telling themselves to do go and do that but it's one of those things that maybe if you are being a little bit naughty with your spending and you're not on top of your budgeting cash flow that guilt could be an indicator that we just need to make some changes we need to tighten things up and do a little bit

of reflecting but at the end of the day both of those outcomes are going to be managed by a good and solid cash flow plan. It's not about being on a strict budget. It's about understanding every dollar that comes in and every dollar that goes out, G. Amazing. And we will dig into those solutions a little later in the show. I wanted to ask you if spending guilt is different to other kinds of money-related guilt? I think it is, but I think guilt around money is a very common theme in our community, whether that is guilt from having money or saving money, or you feel as though maybe you don't deserve the money that you have been afforded from an inheritance, which we've covered in an entire episode on its own, G. But then there's also guilt where you have out-earned

parents or out-earned family members or even just friends. And I think that we really need to break that down about why, when, where, how. How does that work? And communication is the key here. We need to be talking about what we are earning and talking about what we're spending and surrounding ourselves with people who are so supportive of us. No one should be making you feel shitty about how much you earn whether it's too little or too much like that is not a conversation anybody should be having with you they should be so supportive of whatever you're up to let's have a little chat now about our friends at afterpay v oh and that's a very liberal term to have used in the same sentence as afterpay anyone who's ever listened to this show i would say is pretty

aware of our true feelings about afterpay would you say that one of its biggest dangers is that we actually bypass the important regulator of guilt when using it. Yes, absolutely. How many times, and you know, I haven't done this, but how many times have people been like on the Iconic and they're like, oh my God, that's a gorgeous dress. So much easier to swallow if it's just 50 bucks every so often, right? Like that's much easier. So they're kind of taking the pain out of the transaction. And that's something that I'm really passionate about talking about. And that's why I have the banking structure that I have where I think I've spoken about it historically. And if not, go back and listen to our budgeting cashflow episodes. But

I'm very passionate about having a food, fuel, and fun account. And that's where all my money for my groceries and my brunches and my drinks with my friends go, any fun I'm having, and when I go to the petrol station. And that's basically a debit card that I just tap when I am spending that money. And I never feel guilty because it's pre-allocated. But the reason it's pre-allocated is because I know in my head how much each week gets transferred to that account and what I can spend and I still am in control of that transaction and how much it kind of hurts in a way. I don't want to use the word hurt, but you know exactly what I mean. But I want to feel that. I want to go, okay, I know that I've got $250 in that account and I'm going to go out for brunch and

I'm going to shout George. So that's 50. Okay. I'll have 200 at the end of it. And I keep track of it in that way. Whereas you tend to lose control of what you owe and how you owe it and where it's going when you're like oh I'll just chuck it on after pay because it doesn't feel like a real transaction you feel like you're getting that outcome like you're like you get that dopamine hit of the transaction you get the dopamine hit of getting the gorgeous new dress but you don't get any of the pain of separating yourself from that money and I think it's really detrimental because it's manifesting in I guess short-term gratification being the norm and if you compare that to historically. We all know a mum that headed to the Mornington Target in July

for the toy sale to put stuff on lay-by for Christmas. And that was a genius idea where mums could budget and make sure that they had everything that they wanted for Christmas that year by putting it on lay-by and paying it off over time. But it also fostered long-term gratification because how often did they pick up a toy or, you know, I know that sometimes I got to pick one out and it would go onto the lay-by and I was like psyched about it. From July to December, I knew it was coming. It was this long-term gratification. And when I finally got it, that toy was epic. When was the last time you had that feeling? Yeah, you've nailed it.

I just feel like we don't have that anymore because it's so instant. Yeah. I don't think we should have such an instant gratification because it leads to us not caring about things. It leads to us not seeing the value in the things that we purchase. like it's just such a nasty tool that puts us on the back foot really and like I don't mean to keep talking about my engagement shoes but I do adore them but I separated my up banking and created a little fund for that and kept putting money in until I knew I could afford them and then a couple of weeks before my engagement I ended up buying them because I had enough money

in that account for them and then they were sitting in my wardrobe and I could not wait to put them on but for me that was a bit of a long-term gratification thing because I knew what I was working towards. Whereas so often we're not planning purchases with Afterpay and I've had a lot of people message me and they're like, Victoria, I don't know what you're talking about. People should just use it responsibly. It works really well for me. Like I just use it and it means that I don't have to separate with my money and I can budget and I can cash flow better. And I'm just like, great, but you're not the majority. You're the minority. And that's exactly how you would be using it. And I would have no negative opinions on Buy Now Pay Later if that's how

everybody used it. But how many people get buy now, pay later with the intention of doing just that? And then it spirals out of control. Like we literally had a money diarist, George, who was like, oh, I've spent like 80 grand on afterpay and I just didn't know until I'd calculated it. Yuck. Yuck. Yeah. Like that's not who we are. That's not in line with our values. And I think that if it works for you, great. Like the business as a whole is clearly a very well-run business. It is doing things that a lot of businesses wish they could. And as an investor, quote, cool. I see the value. But as a consumer who cares about their community, I just don't see it as a positive thing. Well, like a little bit of guilt is probably a good thing, right? Like obviously

we're condemning it on a larger scale through this episode and we're really unpacking how dangerous it can be and how it's not. But a little bit of guilt's good. It can stop you from making some silly, silly choices. Exactly. Like it's one of the reasons why we don't do some things. You'd be like, oh, I wish I could do that, but I'd feel guilty. Like I'm not going to take advantage of a situation I feel like I am talking about this I guess arguably really passionately because I harbor a lot of guilt I always feel guilty about everything I do like I'm like oh my god like did I just say something that would have offended Georgia like she said bye but usually she says bye love you like do you know what I mean like I'm someone who is arguably very self-aware but

also quite anxious and I think for anybody else who does have anxiety like that is heightened like and it's even worse because you're like oh my god like you catastrophize it and it blows out of proportion. So I think writing things down, doing a bit of journaling, understanding your budget and your cash flow is going to put you in a far better position because you can contextualize it. You can go, this isn't actually that bad. I shouldn't feel bad about spending money on things that I genuinely need. Girl, you've just gone exactly where I was about to finish today's episode. I wanted to talk through some of the real solutions. Oh, not my anxiety. Oh, okay. Yep. No problems. Let's talk about solutions. Let's talk about solutions. So we were talking about like

journaling and writing things down and figuring it out that way. What else can we do? There's a free budget on the She's On The Money website that you can go and download that is super basic, but it does what you need it to do to get a good idea of what's coming into your bank account and what is leaving. So I would do that. Cashflow plan is very, very important. Obviously, I'm a very passionate believer in our budgeting cashflow masterclass because it doesn't just set you up with a budget. Like it's not the free budget on the website. It's an entire tool that then tells you how to save for your goals and it breaks everything down into the bank accounts that you need to have. So not only is it like, okay, we'll have these six bank accounts. It tells you based

on what you choose, whether it's weekly, monthly, fortnightly, annually, how much money needs to go into each of those accounts to make those goals actually happen. So I'm a big believer of that, but it's also about kind of planning joy and making sure that in your budget, you have things for you. Like let's be reasonable about our spending. If you're going to go and download the budget and start filling it in. Don't just look at the incidentals that you go, well, rent, okay, phone bill, okay. Like go and print out, and you guys are going to hate this, go and print out three months worth of your bank statements. Because I guarantee you, you are spending money on things that you don't even know you're spending money on. Like, oh, I have a coffee here and there,

not worth putting in the budget. Yes, it is. Go and have a look at your spending over the last three months and take two different colored highlighters. Grab a green one for the things that are out of your control like rent and bills and you know paying for child care and things that you cannot right now control and then get a different color highlighter and highlight all those discretionary costs like what are you actually spending on uber eats what are you actually spending going out for a quick bev on friday night with the girls because those things do add up and if you're feeling guilty about your spending let's just normalize it let's work out a place to have bevvies with the girls on a friday night in your budget happy hour baby exactly so

you don't feel guilty about that because we don't want that that's not living g no that's not living love this episode my girl a really good conversation about the importance of balance i feel i think so which yeah we can i think we're done absolutely we are uh shall i do the rap i would love to hear it once again all righty guys please remember that the advice shared on she's on the money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances she's on the money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or a financial decision. And we promise Victoria Devine is an authorised representative of InFocus Securities Australia, Proprietary Limited, ABN 47097797049, AFSL 236523.

Stella, perfect. You did so well. You are learning very nicely. But you know where else you learn, G King? In our Facebook group. Certainly. We would love to see you there. If you haven't joined already, it is where our community shares money, tips and tricks every single week, free of judgment. Search She's On The Money on Facebook and join us. We would love it. Please, please, please do. Basically begging. Nah, if you think we're begging, don't come. It's all good. But if Facebook's not your thing, you can find us on Instagram. We're at She's On The Money AUS. We're also on TikTok. We're not good on TikTok. We aren't Gen Z, but we are trying and we would appreciate your support. See you later, guys. Bye, guys.

Thank you for watching.