She's On The Money - MONEY DIARIES: Breaking the Cycle to Build Stability

Episode Date: February 18, 2024

This Money Diarist grew up in government housing, moving 20+ times before the age of 15. But now, she owns her own home, business and has a beautiful bubba! You're sure to be inspired by her story of breaking the cycle of financial instability she grew up with to build a more stable future! Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, my name is Natasha Nabanunga-Bamblett. I'm a proud Yorta Yorta, Kernai, Wolperi and Awadjeri woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on Awadjeri country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through. As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow. Let's get into it. She's on the money.

She's on the money. Hello and welcome to She's On The Money, the podcast of millennials who want financial freedom. Welcome back to another one of our Money Diaries where I get the absolute pleasure of sitting down with one of our incredible She's On The Money community members and learning all about their journey. Let's jump straight into it because this week I got a message and it went like this. Hi V, I've gone from living in government housing and moving 20 plus times before the age of 15 to owning my home and business. I'd love to talk more about my story of breaking the cycle of financial instability I grew up with and building a more stable future. Ah, Marnie Darris, I want

to talk about that too. That's so cool. Yeah, I'm pretty proud. It's been a journey, but yeah, I'm very proud of us and the life that we've created. It does sound like a journey, like it sounds like a very hard journey because like it doesn't sound like, and I'm assuming here that there was probably not a lot of support on the flip side because obviously coming from government housing, you don't have the role models that you probably have become for your own kids, which is very, very cool. Let's jump into it though, because I'm very excited about this. As always, I start the episode with the same question and people are probably bored of it, but there is a purpose to it. Money Diarist, what grade would you give your money habits

if I asked you to grade them from an A through to an F? I have tried to put some thought into this And I think I would give myself a B minus at the moment. A B minus? Yeah. Your story tells me you're an A plus, so I probably have to argue later. A few years ago, it probably would have been a bit lower, but we've worked hard and I've got some really good role models now and I've worked hard to get where I am with my job and we've got some things lined up for the future.

So we know where we want to be. It's just taking some time. That's very exciting. All right, Marnie Dyrus. next question is also my favourite. Can you dive in and tell me a little bit more about your money story? I can. So yeah, I guess we had an interesting upbringing. I was born and raised sort of in Melbourne, but relocated to Queensland when I was really young. And then ever since then, it was probably moving every three to six months we moved houses. My mum and my stepdad just, there was no,

yeah, no stability, changing jobs really frequently. When we moved up, I was under 10 years old so I didn't really grasp what was going on behind the scenes but obviously as I grew up I could tell that they just couldn't manage their finances themselves and that just continued on for yeah I think I ended up moving out of home when I was about 16 so from the ages of yeah 6 to 16 we just moved every yeah few months I think the longest we were in a home was probably eight or nine months and yeah like I said as I grew up I just knew that I wanted to break that cycle I didn't want that for my future and my kids when it came time. So I just worked really hard. My mom and my stepdad had purchased a business that they just didn't have any idea how to run properly.

So of course that ended up in bankruptcy. And yeah, I could sense there was stuff going on behind the scenes, but I didn't know as much as I do now. So yeah, I think it's shaped me into who I am today. And I weirdly am thankful for those experiences because it has just shown me how I don't want to be, as brutal as that might sound. But it's been a blessing in disguise because it's shown me how hard I can work and what I can prove that I can do. It's epic. I love when people are using their stories and actually like growing from them because I think it's so easy to fall into such a similar cycle, right? It's been role modeled for you. So it makes sense. And I think a lot of the time, if those are the role models that you've

been shown you just assume that's how life works and you often find that and you know this isn't me stereotyping it's just kind of the way it is it's why there's always like a debt cycle or a trauma cycle or even an abuse cycle in a family like it goes from generation to generation because you literally just learn from the things that are around you that this is acceptable this is what happens this is how it is like what you could have learned from that is that business is really scary. You will go bankrupt. It will, you know, consume you and be awful, but that's clearly not what you've taken from it. And I just, I get so excited talking to people with this mindset of growth over, you know, just status quo and go, well, where did you get that? Cause like

your parents clearly didn't teach you that. Like it's wild. Yeah. I think I have my brother to thank for that. He's about seven years older than I am. And he was the first one to kind of be like, no, this isn't going to be my life. So he went off and he worked away. He still works fly in, fly out. So I'm really close with him and my sister-in-law and I've got nieces and nephews and we're just, we often talk about the way that our paths could have gone and we both just turned it around and it's gone the other way. I adore that. Mum's no longer here with us, but I know that she'd be super proud regardless of what she went through. Yeah. Of course she'd be super proud. Like, I feel like when you reflect on it and, you know, talk to people who grew up in that

circumstance, they always want better for their kids and they always want their kids to like thrive and flourish. And she's got that. Like, how good is that? That's elite. All right. Next question I've got is, I want to know, you told us you have a business, so let's dive in. What do you do for work? How much money do you earn? So I work in human resources. I finished school. I took a few years to decide what I wanted to do. I went to uni and trialed a degree that wasn't for me. So then I went off traveling for a year and I came back and I had a real good think about it. And in that time, I'd met my partner and he was studying as well. So I kind of really had a good think about what my interests were, landed at human resources, and I smashed out my degree.

and before that was finished I actually managed to secure the job that I'm in now so that was my first sort of HR gig as an administrator just at a local resort here and yeah I'm still there today nearly five years on just been working my way through we've got a small team but a big employee base so it's taught me a lot but currently I'm on 70k plus super very nice yeah so I guess I'm just going to keep chipping away at that and yeah starting elite so you've got a full-time HR job and a side hustle you said you have your own business you're going to have to tell us all about that what's that look like and how does that work so I started that when I was on maternity leave with my son a few years ago so it's a bit of a candles and home fragrance

It was just a hobby that I picked up as something to do in my time at home when I wasn't mumming. And it was great. I just fell in love with it because it gave me that sort of creative outlet and just something I could do for myself. And then I just kept at it, kept at it, and everyone was loving them. So I thought, why not turn this into a little bit of a side hustle? So yeah, that's kind of grown a little bit from there. And I wanted to set it up in a way that I could when I wanted to commit some more time to what I could but obviously I knew that I would return to my full-time job after my leave was up so I just let it kind of simmer in the background I do it ad hoc but now that I'm on maternity leave with my second as well I've

been able to give it some real love and watch it grow again which has been super exciting but it is just something I do slowly you know I've got two kids so it's a big ask to get it all done it's more of a side hustle at this point it is how much income would it bring in I think probably it sits around you know probably about six or seven k annually at the moment hey that's very nice yeah so it's something it helps it definitely it helps and I am just doing it at the moment just because I love it um and like I said it gives me that creative space away from the kids while I'm not at work to just have something for me no I love it I love talking about this because I think so many times when you like speak to people who don't have side hustles or businesses there's

this massive assumption that to start a business or start a side hustle means you have to like go all in and you have to replace your full-time income and that's what you're looking for and the reality is you don't have to do that what you can do is just like a little side hustle that nourishes you and keeps you busy and gives you something to do while the kids are sleeping if your mind won't sit still. And six to seven K a year, like girl, that's a lot of money. Like you could put that towards a mortgage. You could put that towards savings. You could go on an extra holiday. Like there's just so much financial freedom that that money brings in addition that you just go, that makes sense. I love it. Yeah. How exciting. So talk to me about your big

money goals. What are you guys currently working towards? Well, our biggest money goal at the moment is we're getting married in just under 12 weeks oh congrats so that's kind of where everything's going at the moment which is so fine because as much as we're wanting to you know keep it low-key we still want to enjoy ourselves and enjoy our day but it things add up very quick it's terrifying isn't it it is and like all the last minute stuff in the last 12 weeks you're like oh and I don't have oh and I don't have it's so annoying yeah yeah it is so I've done my best but it's still a big money item so I think once that's out of the way we haven't sort of planned to go away anywhere so I'd like to do that for ourselves but I guess we own our home but probably

in the next couple of years we're in two minds of whether we sell this space and get something new or we keep this as an investment so I think that's our next big one and just setting up ourselves a little bit better in terms of investing for ourselves and our kids so a few things and it's bit tricky to just focus on one because I'm not I'm a person who likes to kind of do it all at once which can just get a bit too much yeah totally yeah can I be real pervy about your wedding I want to know did you set a budget at the start if so how's that tracking I set a budget of 15,000 yep like I said I've done my best I've sourced what I can secondhand and on Facebook marketplace which has been a lifesaver and even the venue we used is relatively new so they were

about a quarter of the price of what places are where I'm located yeah so did that well um but it yeah it's all the little things we're probably up over the 20k at the moment so yeah but we're just trying to rein it right in in these last few weeks I'm trying to really just focus on what the day's about and not all of the extra little things. Money Durst I need to ask about your $20,000 budget we've gone a little bit over but before then you do have a five-month-old sitting on your lap. So if anyone is listening along and can hear someone joining in the conversation, she looks very, very cute. She's very cute. She's very animated and I like her contributions. I'm not sure if I understand them yet, but you can come on the show when you're a bit older. Agreed.

Agreed. But tell me a bit more. I'm so pervy about weddings because like I obviously had one, loved the process. How did you go from 15 to 20? Like, was that something where you're like, oh my gosh we completely forgot to allocate a b c or d or is it like decisions that you're like we assumed that the venue would be you know x and it was actually y yeah it was more um the latter I think it's just that old story of when you say that it's for a wedding it's terrifying isn't it yeah it's just we kind of assumed that things would cost an amount and they've come back at nearly double what we thought but it's all things that you know we kind of need like the music and the food. It's not all of the extras, all of the extra stuff I've just reined it right in. So I

think my partner looks at it and he's like, what are we doing? But I show him what we're actually spending the money on and he gets it. Yeah. And we're both in the same mindset. Like we still want to enjoy our day. It does sting a bit knowing how much money is going into it, but we're just going to push through and just have the best day. I love it. And the same thing happened with us like I was just consistently shocked at how much things cost and you know it it's fine because I think once you're on the same page with your partner and you're like no we both really want this like let's just take it step by step it's okay but I think it's one of those things that when you're planning a wedding you're like oh it just feels like blow after blow yeah especially

when you do we did want to keep it low cost but then like I said like as soon as you start reaching out to people saying, you know, we've got a wedding coming up. Yeah, things just add up so fast. I mean, at the end of the day, 20 grand on a wedding is literally a third of what the average Australian wedding costs. So you're not doing too badly. Let's go to a really quick break. On the flip side, I want to ask you so many more questions about investments and habits and whether you're in debt. So guys, don't go anywhere. All right, Money Diarist, we are back and first cab off the rank, I want to know, do you invest? If so, how? If not, what's the plan? So thanks to She's On The Money, I have actually, I didn't even really know anything about it until

about six months ago, probably. I'd heard obviously about it, but didn't know enough to feel comfortable. And then just from taking in as much content as I can from the podcast, I've just started doing the micro-investing as a beginning sort of step just to get familiar. Oh, cool. No, it's perfect. Yeah, just to kind of get myself familiar with the process. My partner's across it more, but yeah, I feel like if I needed to be comfortable to make sort of the big step into it, that I needed to understand the process and what goes in.

So I started that and just, it's really interesting just being able to log on and kind of see and it's, I think it's a great first step for me to take and I'm really enjoying the platform that I'm using. So it's good. I love it. How good is that? All right. Jumping into debts, you own your own house.

so I'm assuming there is a mortgage hiding somewhere there but tell me all about debt is that your only debt if so what is it tell me the juicy details so yes we've got the mortgage I think at the moment it's at about 420 we were really quite fortunate we managed to fix our interest rate just before COVID so the interest rates were really really low locked it in under two percent so oh unrelatable mine's currently sitting at like six and a half and I literally look at it and go how did we get here yeah so I don't know that was just a stroke of luck or I'm not sure but locked that in for five years so we're happy with that oh very nice yes especially that's taken us through the two maternity leave so that's been a big help just knowing the set

amount that's going to be paid each fortnight so that's our biggest one I own my car however my partner actually has a novated lease arrangement on his car which again it was something I didn't know much about but yeah our situation at the time it was kind of what made the most sense with us and his work was willing to take that on with him cool so that's higher than I'd like it to be it's at about 40k yeah so but yeah it works the way that he's got it set up with I guess the novated lease arrangement it's a big chance that is paid but I guess it's what we had to do at the time. So I'm just letting it do its thing. But apart from that, we don't have any credit cards. We only use Afterpay as kind of like a cash flow tool. It's never blown out of the budget. But

yeah, apart from that, we're pretty on track. Very cool. What kind of things are you putting on Afterpay? Because I'm not one of those people that could be trusted with Afterpay. You quite clearly are, and that's fine. But I want to know, is it like clothes and shoes or is it like, oh, they're the big ticket baby items? Or like, what does your Afterpay usage look like? it kind of changes every so often we've got a couple of big dogs that you know require their monthly big food order so we kind of put that on and budgeted into our sort of cash flow process and that's like a pretty regular one just to break it down the that sort of upfront cost at the moment it's been a few wedding things but I do have a wedding sort of account and it's just

that we're paying into each fortnight so it just assists us with that sort of yeah like I said that cash flow of if I needed it sort of I don't know now because the wedding's coming up it just allows me to kind of work it that way but we're good with it it's never been something that's blown out but I guess I would like to get to a point that we don't need it at all but it's a helpful tool in your situation and I feel like some people can be trusted with it and some people can't I'm I'm in the bucket of can't and that's okay but it's always interesting because obviously if you're using it correctly it doesn't implicate you financially in any way like you're not up for more interest or, you know, you're not in a pickle, but a lot of people like me would just

go down a slippery slope. Like genuinely, if you're like, hey, so this dress is $200. You could have it for 50 bucks today. I'd be like, that's a money win. And of all people, you would think that I'm educated enough to know the difference. And I am, which is why we don't use it. But I think it's cool to see how other people are using it because it can actually be a really effective cashflow tool. And I'm not saying go get it because it's a great tool, bit more, you know, obviously in your circumstance, you're about to get married. You have a lot of costs. You have two tiny humans to look after. Like I'm assuming it takes a little bit of a weight off. Yeah. Yeah, it does. It does help. But like I said, I would like to get to a point

that we just don't use it at all. But at the moment it has been a great little tool. You will. You absolutely will. All right. Tell me, what do you think your best money habit is? Best money habit. I think it would be putting time between my purchases. obviously that's something you talk about a lot of the podcast but it is something that I think relates back to sort of my money story and how I was brought up we just kind of had to make do we never kind of were able to go out to the shop and you know just grab things what we wanted at the time so I do put a lot of thought in between a purchase and I'll often sometimes it bugs me because I'll go out to buy something that I need and I'll come home and say oh like without it and

just think that it was something I needed but I actually just couldn't do it at the time so And it does get tricky with the kids because I do, there is things that I need to go out and get, but I'll have to come home and think about it and then I'll go back. So I think it is a helpful mindset that I have because I don't make those big impulse purchases on the spot. But yeah, I think that is probably my best one at the moment. Do you think that that weighs heavily on you as well sometimes? Because like I'm picking up this tone of like, I'm going to the shops, I'm looking at it and it's not because I'm good at money that I say, let's put 24 hours between me and my purchase it sounds and like I'm obviously not trying to diagnose it here but

it sounds a little bit like you're maybe anxious about those purchases yes yeah I do get anxious like my partner and I've worked really hard to get we don't have a heap of savings at the moment but we do have a little bit of a safety net on the side that I don't like it to get below a certain amount and that's just because of how I was brought up we didn't have that and it's just to feel sort of somewhat secure and that you know if things just happen it's life car thing issues come up or the kids need something urgently so I do get anxious about purchases it's probably anything under that $50 mark I'm generally okay anything more than I tend to really have to think about which in some instances is good because if I'm at the shops

with a friend I'm not just one to grab things off the shelf and be like oh that's fine I'll just I'll make it work but I definitely have a level of anxiety about just sort of random spending that I haven't accounted for because I just worry about you know what if xyz comes up and we don't have that cash flow there to be able to cover it so yeah it's a tricky one I'm trying to get better with the anxiety around it but I think it also is something that I might just live with the level of because yeah it's just how I was brought up unfortunately in that sort of you know it's really things are scarce at times so you just had to make do but yeah it's something I'll work out to dive into this a little bit more because I feel like it's probably so relatable do you

have a budget like are you writing down a budget each month or like have you got a system we've tried a few and I just don't think we've quite nailed it and I think yeah it's something that And we do our best to stick to, but I think we kind of tend to stretch the budget a little bit too far in terms of allocating funds that we don't leave enough for ourselves out. And then, of course, that means then we're dipping into areas that we shouldn't be. So I think we just haven't found that correct sort of process for us. It's always something that we try to review and look at. But yeah, again, we just haven't found the correct way. And it's a goal of mine for this you up to get it right on track and find a way that works the best for us so that we don't run

into these sort of hiccups along the way. But yeah. I love it because I think I can fix that for you. I'm going to gift you a budget and cashflow masterclass, which if you've seen it online, I'm biased because I made it. So I think it's really good, but it is the most comprehensive way of managing your budget that makes sure that we're taking into account like fund money and annual expenses as well as those day-to-day costs. So I'm going to give you that because I think that that is going to help set you up properly. There's a singles version, which won't apply to you, but there is a couples version as well that breaks down all of it and includes a whole section for kids as well. So like, I feel like there's not an area I haven't thought of. And historically,

when there has been, I've just gone in and switched out all of the information to update it because I'm like, oh my gosh, I didn't include X, Y, Z because it wasn't a priority for me. Yeah, that's amazing. Thank you. that'll be helpful. And for those of you listening at home who might be interested in doing the money masterclass as well, I'll pop a discount code in the show notes, but it will be POD50 and it'll give you 50 bucks off, which is a money win. But I just, when you said that, I was like, oh, I think I can help here. If you've got like a system that hasn't worked, like I've got one that works for literally thousands of people. But now you have to tell me in exchange for that, what your worst

money habit is? Oh, my worst money habit would be ducking into the grocery store probably three or four times a week. I do my weekly shop, but then I have to, you know, do the little top-ups, but that just blows out every time I'm there. So I just, and again, I think it comes back to we're not correctly budgeting for, you know, the big weekly shops. So I'm ducking in to grab bread and milk and then I need something for the kids. So it's, it quickly adds up to be an extra, you know, sometimes up to a hundred dollars a week that we haven't allocated for groceries. So I need to pull that right back. That would definitely be the worst one. And I know when I'm doing it as well, but you know, there's things that I can't not get along the way. So yeah, absolutely. Like

kids need what they need and it's frustrating. All right. Tell me at the start of the episode, you said, I think I'm a B minus, but I have learned that you have changed your entire money story. You've got an epic full-time job. You're a little side hustler. Like even when your kids are asleep, you're like, I'm not going to rest. Rest is for the wicked. I'm going to start a little side hustle business. I need to know, one, what would it take to get you to an A plus? And two, why do you think B minus is reflective of where you currently are at? So I think to get to an A plus, I need to get our sort of budget and cash flow just set in a way that works. We're on it. Look at us. This is a problem solving money diary.

yeah I think I'll feel a lot more confident with um where we're headed if we can get that nailed down so that's exciting because I think that'll I think yeah this is really going to help with that and I really want to focus more on investments this year or investing sorry I think now that I've dabbled in the micro investing once the wedding's out of the way that's sort of our big focus yeah of course yeah so it's all exciting and it's all attainable it's just we've got a few things to knock out of the park first and then once that's sorted well you said you were going to knock it out of the park and she's like heck yeah you are mama she's so happy it kills me she's just like beaming on camera no one else gets to see it don't be sorry it's the best

yeah I think once those two things are sorted I'll feel pretty proud and pretty stoked and I think I'll be more of an A plus then but yeah I think my B minus is that we've got all these sort of plans to get to these places and then sort of the budget and cash flow doesn't work so there were a few steps back it's kind of two steps forward one step back but it seems that we just can't quite get there and we've maybe not had the right tools in place or I've not known enough about what you know the investment world so I'm putting by listening to the podcast and doing my own external research I'm excited to sort of focus on those areas more and yeah love love love oh my gosh. I feel like you are well on track, like everything has been set up and you are working

towards it. But I feel like you have achieved so much and I'm so proud of where you've come from and where you are now. And I know that your mum would be so proud. Like, you know, you said before, like, you know, she's not around, but I think she'd be proud. What do you mean think? You know, she'd be proud. She'd be over the moon. You're exactly where she wishes she could have been when she was, you know, bringing you up. And I think that that's just such a beautiful thing as well. but unfortunately that is all we have time for today I am genuinely so grateful for this story I think it's been fun and engaging and I've loved learning about your wedding and where you've come from and what your plans are for the future and I'm genuinely so excited to give you my money

masterclass because I'm like hold on I think this could really help like I actually think this will get your stuff together so that you feel like an A plus sooner so I'm very happy about this So thank you so much for sharing your journey with us and I hope our paths cross in person in the future at some point. Thank you so much for having me and I'm really excited to do the course. Thank you again. The advice shared on She's on the Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial

advice tailored towards your needs. Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of MoneySherpa PTY LTD ABN 321 649 27708 AFSL 451 289. Thank you.