She's On The Money - My Mum Spent My Savings. It Changed the Way I Think About Money Forever.

Episode Date: August 16, 2026

Growing up, her mum believed in spending now and worrying later. Her dad was the complete opposite. He planned ahead, saved where he could, and quietly showed her what financial security could look like. After her parents separated, everything changed. By 14, she'd landed her first job and was handing over every pay cheque, believing it was going straight into savings. It wasn't. When she finally asked for the money back, there was barely anything left. That moment shaped everything that came next. She worked three jobs while studying full-time, bought her first home on her own, met her now husband, and together they've built the life they'd always dreamed of. Today they're raising two little girls in their forever home on acreage, growing their investments and already thinking about the money lessons they'll pass on to the next generation. We chat about growing up between two completely different money mindsets, buying a home solo in your twenties, building wealth as a family, finding a partner who champions your financial goals, and why sometimes the biggest gift a parent gives you isn't money. It's showing you the kind of person you want to become. This conversation is equal parts heartbreaking, hopeful and incredibly empowering. And honestly? You're going to fall a little bit in love with her dad.Acknowledgement of Country By Nartarsha Bamblett (nartarshabamblett.com.au) The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs. Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 4451289See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

My name is Natasha Bamblett, I'm a proud First Nations woman, and I'm here to acknowledge country. Tii, gilinyan ganya, nianakaka yao yinbina waka, nianakai nianbina yakarumja, duminyagumiga dumiga ithawaka nirawamundamun imalan, mumubangaraboma ininyalan waka, gaunonyakarumja, wutunarana. Hello beautiful friends. We gather on the lands of the Aboriginal people. We thank, acknowledge and respect the Aboriginal people's land that we're gathering on today. Take pleasure in all the land and respect all that you see. She's on the money podcast acknowledges culture, country, community and connections, bringing

you the tools, knowledge and resources for you to thrive. She's on the money. She's on the money. hello and welcome to she's on the money the podcast that lets you be pervy about other people's money habits for educational purposes of course welcome back to another one of our money diaries brought to you by our friends at sky wealth where i get the absolute privilege of sitting down with one of our beautiful community members and talking to them all about their journey. Let's jump straight into it because this week I got a message

and it sounded exactly like this. Hi, she's on the money. My mom has always been very spend now, live for today, while my dad is the complete opposite, a planner and a saver. Growing up between those two very different approaches to money shaped me, especially after my parents separated and I was raised by my dad. In 2021, I bought my first home on my own after working three jobs to make it happen. I later met my now husband, who was admittedly terrible with money at the time. We started working together on our finances, learning from each other and becoming much more intentional about our goals. Since then, we've bought our dream home, built up our savings and our investments and welcomed two children. We now want to keep improving our own financial

future while also teaching our kids to have a healthy and confident relationship with money. I'm also friends with another money diarist and was the one who introduced her to She's on the Money, which has been a huge part of my own financial journey too. Money diarist, thanks for having my back and being a solid referral partner. I appreciate that. That is okay. It's been our financial Bible. It's heavy in the mum chat and the girl chat.

I love this. I feel like mum group chat is where I want to thrive. like that's where I want to be. It is. It's branched off into selected mum group chat, but they're a great bunch. Honestly, if it was all about me, I'd be quite disappointed. Honestly, that's, I don't know about you, but my mum group chat pops off at 3am at the moment. And I'm just, I don't want to talk finance at that point. I want to talk shop. Fair, fair. There are a lot of 3am purchases in that baby stage. Yes. Well, what happens at 3am? It's honestly none of my business.

It doesn't count when everybody else is sleeping. It's an investment into my mental health. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. All right. Money, Darius, before we get further into it, what grade would you give your money habits from A3 to F if I asked you to give them a grade? I think currently I would rate myself probably a C+. I've got some learning to do, but I've come a long way.

Queen, after that intro, you're going to go, that intro gets a C+. Maybe. Okay. Maybe we'll bump it to a B. There's definitely room for improvement. We're already bumping. All right. We're already bumping. I don't even get people to bump at the start usually, but let's learn a little bit more about your money diary because I have a sneaky suspicion you're doing better than you think you are. Let's start from the top. Can you tell me a bit more about your money story and the things that have impacted it? Yeah. So, I grew up quite well off and my parents were together. It wasn't until later in life where I started to realize those habits and what they meant. But we grew up in quite a lush house. It

was a double story back in the early days that was living and we had three rumpus rooms. That actually is living. And also the word lush, can we make that a comeback word? calling things lush you just go yeah that was lush oh you had a rumpus room as well yes we had a rumpus room the ensuite had a spa built into it my dad had his own pool room like it was we were living a pool room yep can i ask some more niche questions was there a fridge in the rumpus room there sure was there was a bar oh see see live in live in did you have a double door fridge by chance we did and we also had the double doors to the room retreat like the room the doors on the room to the they had glass in them didn't they yes yes oh she's rich yes it

was very 90s rich yes probably not 2020s rich but 90s absolutely no but also isn't it funny how things have changed and what that looks like like in wealth like there were such significant markers of wealth or what we thought it looked like back then. Like if you've had a rumpus room, like, oh girl, I can't wait to come to your house. Yeah. Two downstairs, one upstairs. It was the house to be at with all the kids. All right. Well, tell me more. Tell me more. So it wasn't until my parents decided to split up, definitely for the better. For the better, but also like low-key rude, sure. I had three rumpus rooms. Exactly, exactly. And dad being dad gave mum the house. She had the three kids,

so you can have the house. What a nice guy. Legend. But soon discovered mum couldn't afford the house on her own, let alone the car or anything like that. So it all started to crumble and things started to change. We went from Santa bringing us 30 plus presents every Christmas to like three or four, which as a mom now, I think that's quite modest. But back in the day, I'd wondered what have we done wrong? Well, it's the expectation you set, right? Like, don't get me wrong. There's no way my kids are getting 30 plus presents each at Christmas time. But if that's the expectation you've set with your children and then something changes, they don't go, oh, mom and dad might be in a different

financial position. Or they don't even say like, oh, I got 30 presents and those presents were $2 each. They don't say that. They say volume. Exactly. I don't know. I feel like I even had to change my mindset as I got a little bit older. Like Santa used to bring us like, you know, 10 quite cheap presents in Santa sacks. And then all of a sudden I was asking for something bigger and my mom had to be like, did you know if you ask Santa for that he was only going to get like one or two presents as opposed to 30 like not that we got that but you know what I mean like you have to reset the expectation and you would be like was I naughty like did I do something literally you think you've done something wrong but aside

from Santa getting stingy we moved from like rental house to rental house we were constantly moving once, if not twice a year. Mom had obviously sold that family home and just things looked very, very different for us. I didn't get to see dad as much. He'd moved back in with his mom going through a divorce and trying to pick himself back up. So that's what it kind of looked like early on. Can I be a little bit pervy and ask what led to that? Because obviously you said before dad's a legend mom could have the house but mom couldn't afford the house no what leads you to then moving so regularly because I feel like that's you know getting a cheap rental property sure but like why were you moving so consistently I just think mom is a very much like appearance

person keeping up with the joneses if the house was old or it didn't look great or you know it didn't suit we needed to move if if her friends had something we needed to move closer to them or if we didn't have that many friends my sister and I we'd share a room but then as soon as we'd start to make friends people would see our house and then it wasn't acceptable anymore to you know have our kids sharing a bedroom so we needed to move to something different well okay I'm glad I Yeah. It was all about the appearances and what made us look like we were doing fine when in hindsight, it really didn't matter. A roof over your head, I think is pretty bloody good. 100%. But I guess, what did that look like for your mum? Obviously, that's coming from

maybe being a little bit insecure or wanting more than what you can currently afford. But was that you know, because she grew up with that? Was that because she was just like wanting the best for her children or was it just, you know, do you know where that came from? I think it's just the kind of person she is since I've gotten older and done a lot of diving within myself and, you know, I have a really strong relationship with my dad and talking to him about that and the breakup between him and mum and, you know, doing outside work. I think like I see it now. My mom is very narcissistic and very opinionated her way or the highway, very like a simple minded, very money, money, money, but doesn't seem to want to really do

the work to have that higher income. She'll find a way to cheat a system kind of thing. Yes, it's not the greatest. No. So it would be safe of me to assume you don't have a great relationship with your mum? Not necessarily, certainly not the same as my dad's, but she's definitely in the picture, but at arm's length now that I have children. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. I was like, oh, I like immediately. And it's funny because like, I have the privilege of being able to see you and our community can't see you because you're obviously anonymous. But I love when I ask about people and their faces light up because I said like, oh, so your dad, like, you know, like your mum has a house and like, you were like, yeah,

legend. And your whole face lit up and I was like, okay, cool. She has a fantastic relationship with her dad. Like I can already tell. And then when your mom came up, I was like, oh, I'm reading between some lines already here. I think I might ask and be a little bit pervy because I think I know what I'll get here. So I do apologize, but it's also important, right? And do you think that that's just her personality or it's money driving that kind of personality? I think she is very money-driven very very money-driven like as like my story goes on like when I needed like Centrelink and things with like studying and youth support and youth allowance and rent assistance she was always the first person to be like oh you need to do this or I'll do that for you or

like you're entitled to this you're entitled to that and it's just it's not something that sits great with me at all. Yeah okay you were like oh I just need a bit of support but it was like the mindset behind it right? Yeah yeah very much so very much so so yeah. And so what did that look like as you got a bit older like I feel like as a kid stepping back like yeah you think you've done something wrong at Christmas time but then you start to get older and I think you know once you hit your early teens you start putting two and two together. And that's that's exactly what happened all this I don't know if I'm allowed to say but all this bullshit that my mum fed me I started to realize that's so not what the case is it was a very one-sided story and being older

and you know growing up you start to become curious and and learn things and I think the relationship I don't know if it's genetics or what it is with my dad it's just it's so solid that I don't think mom realized how much of a bond like her kids had with their dad. But when I turned 14 and I could get a job, I went and got a job straight away. I was a Macca's fry girl. Oh, good job queen. I was shoveling fries. It was so good. I remember my first shift was like three hours and I probably got paid like, oh, probably like $15 an hour if that. And I was so tired after my first shift and I like slept like 12 hours and it was literally a three-hour shift on the fry station yeah but also it's not the fry station like it was the

mental load of like now having to learn a new task and like trying to appease everybody and probably trying to absorb everything all at one time like I remember way back in the day when I was learning to drive whenever I did like you know mum would be like all right well Victoria you're trying to get your L's and you know you need to do your hours and so I'd like get in the car and drive to school. And then I'd have a headache because I'd concentrated so hard. I was exhausted. I feel like it's just, it's new. Everything that is new is genuinely hard at the start. But you were like, V, it was shoveling fries. I don't know what happened. No, Queen, you were genuinely tired. I was, I was. But with that first job came an income.

I was so excited. I was earning money. I was like, yes, I'm earning money. Like, this is awesome. And then my mom turned around and said, no worries, just transfer me your pay and I'll put it in your savings. So I just started transferring my money to my mom and just didn't think anything of it. She just looked after it. I didn't pay bills. I didn't pay my phone bill, like anything. Mom just covered it. She was like, it's the best thing I can, you can do. so started doing that and then a year or so went by and I remember asking I needed to get some money out and there was significantly less than what I thought there would be and she turned around she goes oh well you have to pay for like petrol to get to work so I took that out and

you know your phone like you had to pay for that so I took that out and oh we went for dinner this night so I took some out there and before I knew it like turns out I'd been paying my way without even knowing I was paying my way. You said something interesting before you said, I don't know what contributed to the strong bond we had with my dad. It was genetics or like maybe it could have been genetics, babe. It wasn't, it was respect. Well, yeah, true. That's actually, that's probably very, very true. It probably is genetics to an extent. Sure. Like blood is thicker than water, all of that stuff. but like I'm assuming this man actually respected you and then it's crazy how quickly a bond can

grow when you have a really stark contrast like because you had that contrast between your mom and your dad immediately even if you couldn't comprehend it you were probably like dad can trust mom cannot trust and that obviously is going to mean that even if you're like 14 years and nine months and have your first job and you don't actually have your frontal lobe developed yet you can still lean into being like, I actually feel safe telling him things and therefore your relationship grows and blossoms. But you probably held back a lot once you learned that about your mom, right? Absolutely. I started to almost resent my mom. I felt like I was the black sheep in the family. My older sister and her had this inseparable relationship and I just didn't have

that I didn't like materialistic things I didn't like shopping and doing all the things that mum did she'd go out and just spend like money was no object and I remember talking to dad about it and was like I'm just I'm not sure what to do here I'm stuck at my mum's and I'm not like this is not what I want and dad actually said to me I'll open up a savings account for you and it's in your name and it was one of those little Bendigo Bank passbook money ones that you go in and you take the book and you know it's like an old school like printer and it scans it in and stuff and I started giving a portion of my pay to my dad so that my mum didn't know that I was putting money on the side and she just assumed she was getting it all and no questions asked

Oh my God. That's so sad though. It is. It really is. And then I think I must've, we must've had an argument or something over, I wanted to buy something or do something. And she told me I didn't have the money for it. And I couldn't understand why as I was working. And I just, I wrote a letter and I put it on my bed and I texted my dad and I said, I live with you now. And my dad picked me up. Oh, icon dad. yeah he was on his way to work and he just came picked me up and he'd had three daughters none of any who have lived with him since he'd been separated and now all of a sudden he's got a

teenager to look after oh goodness and how did that go because like putting a letter on a bed like that sounds like movie kind of like it does doesn't it I'm a bit dramatic no no same queen like if I was going to do something it would be like that thankfully I wasn't in that situation but I'm like, yeah, that sounds like something I would try to pull. Tell me what happens after you leave a letter on your bed and you go to your dad's house. So I didn't hear from my mom for about five years after then. She just completely abandoned me, cut me off. My dad would try and communicate with her even just to get my bed back. And the response was I paid for that bed. It's my bed. So I didn't get my bed. I didn't get any of my stuff. That's your little child, like literally

your child. What are you doing? Yeah. So I got, I got like a black trash bag with like my work uniform, some essential like clothes, like pants and stuff. And then, and that was it. And then I told dad about the money that I should have in this so-called savings. And all of a sudden mom didn't remember any of that and it just it didn't matter it all went I just had nothing so that that was hard I'm so sorry my heart oh I want to give baby you a hug like be for real like no kid deserves that no it was awful but I genuinely think it made me the person I am today and I know the mum that I want to be to my children yeah and that's a gift in a way that's such a gift like and every day you just know and you know what I hope your kids don't take you for

granted but at the times that they do they're taking you for granted because they trust you and that's also really beautiful like it is because they they know they're not walking on eggshells with you like that's crazy cool exactly so yeah I I lived with dad and then I started saving again and I didn't really know what I wanted to do I'd gone through this big change I was like 15 at the time at this point and I said to dad I was doing really poorly in school I said I think I want to go overseas and become an exchange student and do that and dad was like absolutely like you're working go for it if that's what you want to do I'll support you on it and I applied and then I saw how much it would cost me and I didn't have 10 grand at 15 like to go over

and you know I just lost this money from my mum so I actually got offered a scholarship because I rejected it and said of course you did I can't go like I don't have the financial means I'm supporting this trip on my own like it's something I want to do so I'm gonna do it so I got offered a scholarship for half and then dad said to me whatever you can save between now and January when your flight leaves, I will match. So he matched it. Go dad. Oh, what an icon. Yes. So I went, I jetted off to Denmark and I spent a year over there when I was 15 and a half. And I loved it. Yeah, absolutely loved it. Dad gave me a monthly budget and was like, this is your monthly allowance for while you're over there. You can do what you want with it,

but don't ask me for any more. Like you need to learn how to, how to budget. So I did. And then I came back and I finished high school dad was like perfect and I studied hard and then I got into uni and I thought that was what I was meant to do I thought I got into law and I thought my parents would be stoked with me and I hated it I did half a semester of law and just it wasn't for me and I dropped out. And at that point, I didn't understand hex or cut off dates or any of that stuff. Or census dates or like hoping that you got out before that. Census dates got me good. That was not a choice. That was a poor choice for sure. Oh, but I feel like you learned a lot from that, even though it was not anything to do with law, right? Exactly. Exactly. And I went home

and I said to dad I hate uni it's not for me and he said that's fine I'll support you but you need to get a job you need to work yeah you can't do nothing exactly he's like you're gonna need to pay for your phone bill you can contribute to the house you don't have to pay for groceries but contribute at least so I did I loved travel and I went out and got a job as a travel agent oh cool Yeah. So I got to travel for about five years at a much cheaper rate, if not free a lot of the times. Yeah. I thought I'd be smart and combine my interests with my job and there's got to be perks somewhere. Oh, a hundred percent. And there were. So I spent the next five years absolutely going to town, traveling. I was like on four or five trips a year. I would go on a trip,

come back, book my next one. I was probably overseas more than I was in Australia. At this point as well, I'd moved out of home. I was covering my rent. I was living, love and life, zero responsibilities, just travel, travel, travel. I was single. I loved it. And then I did meet someone and then I went through an awful breakup and it derailed me. I put so much into it and it derailed me and I ended up moving back home. I stopped caring about my job. I eventually got fired from my job because I just didn't care anymore. And I thought, what am I doing? I've been traveling for the last five years. Yes, it was my priority and where I valued, but it was starting to change. And then I went back and studied.

You were ready. You were ready to lock and load into study. Yeah. I was. And at this point, my mom had started to float back in and she was very much like, well your sisters have gone to uni what are you doing with your life like I'm really sorry but I don't think I'd get along with this woman I don't get along with her the best of times she's just not my people that's not that's not gone yeah so then I started to feel guilty my older sister had gone to uni she's now a paramedic my younger sister had done a double degree and had interned with One Direction in the UK and I was like okay but that's pretty cool too yeah well she didn't use her degree now did she she's a police officer but that's also cool and it's funny because it's

like you have siblings and you know you shouldn't ever compare yourself but because they're so close you would be like oh they're like quote legit what am i doing and that's what i thought they had grown up jobs i didn't i was jet setting and not being serious and they're probably looking at you being like oh money diarist is so cool she has a better lifestyle like you know you always on what you can't have right the grass is always greener exactly exactly so I yeah I went back to studying and at this point my dad had had a new partner and they were living together so my dad had an investment property and he said you can live in my investment property and you'll pay rent and my little sister moved in with me and the two of us just lived there that's so wholesome

Awesome. And also dad sounds like a legend. He is the absolute OG. Even my friends love him. He's an OG. I love this. I'm just so glad that your experience with a narcissistic parent wasn't matched with another narcissistic parent because a lot of people in our community could tell you that like they seem to attract each other. Yes. Yes. I still, to this day, I'm what, 32 and I say to my dad, how did you ever marry mom? Like, what did you see in her? He's like, I don't know, daughter, I got you three girls out of it. So I'm like, okay, cool. Yeah. Like dad, I don't mean to be rude, but like that was a pretty bad mistake. It was a terrible choice. Come on, sir. Exactly.

But yeah, my little sister and I, we moved in and I studied and I worked three jobs. And I said to dad, I think I want to buy a house. I need to buckle down. I'm going to buy a house. I'm going to do it. And I was in my boss bitch era, like women supporting women, like strong, independent women. We can do this.

Like, I'm going to show the world that I'm a single woman and I can do this. You can. And I did. I worked three jobs and I studied full time. and every cent that I earned from those jobs, that was either a tile or some tapware or that was a fitting in the house or that was upgraded carpets and I didn't want to spend it. So I was like, that's my house right there. Like I can't watch that go away. No, but tell me about these three jobs. What three jobs kind of click together with uni? Because like it's a bit chaotic. I did

the same thing. And I often get people being like, well, how did you do that? Like, how did you do it all? Yeah. So I got a part-time job as a medical receptionist. I just, when I got fired from my travel job, I was like, what's going on at the moment? What's out there? And also that's a good job. Yeah. Really good. Really good. So I worked that part-time, I think it was like two to three days a week. And then I casually worked in the disability sector doing like day programs. are very cool yeah I loved it it was good it brought the income in I paid my rent and I had savings I was doing really good and then the time came and I said to dad let's go land looking let's go find some land I can do this and he said okay and that day I said to the land office

is this block available and they said yep I said I want to deposit on that right now and I had to pay to deposit straight away. Stop it. What about that block of land made you go, I need that one? It was just a good size. It wasn't on like a T intersection. My dad always says, don't buy a T intersection block. People's headlights come in your front window. So I was like, it's not a corner block. It's not a T intersection block. It's big enough, like done. I'm happy. It's a good price back when land was like 260K. It's a 450 square block. It was in our local town I was still close to everything I was like let's do it like it was a new development and I did it and dad we're driving home from the the land office and dad said I've been saving for

all three of you girls for when you buy your first home or your house and land and I'm going to contribute 10 grand dad and he gave me 10 grand and he gave my younger sister 10 grand and she did it and unfortunately my older sister is not in the picture um so hers just sits there but yeah so my dad gifted me that he said you've worked really hard and you know you set your mind to it and you're doing it isn't that so beautiful but also just the idea that he did that and didn't tell you until after you'd done it that would well it gets even better stop it go I'm I'm loving this story like I'm I'm buckled in babe yeah he's honestly he's a legend so a few years went by COVID hit still paying rent and dad said all the rent that you and my sister

paid he's like I just paid the net on the mortgage and the rest is in the account and he gave us our little bendigo bank little um paper books and he showed us like what our savings were because of the on top of the rent essentially he's like I saved the difference he's like I needed to cover my mortgage I don't want to make money off you girls it's gone back into a savings account for you both and my sister had hers and I had mine and before I knew it I had like 25k just sitting there without even realizing for when I decided on the house plan it was amazing dad oh I love him I love him so much like dad's a girl's girl he is he's very much a girl's girl so that kind of happened and then I met my now husband during COVID who kind of lived with me you know and

that little bubble rule came in where you could have an intimate partner and I was like we've been dating a week, but sure, you could be my intimate partner because I don't want to be lonely. And also, I feel like COVID just threw you in. You either had to go boots and all in on a relationship or I felt like everybody was getting divorced. There was no medium there, I don't feel. No, you're in or you're out and you just need to tell me and then we're going to go down that route. So yeah, I met him and I remember thinking he worked one job. He was on over 100k like how do you earn 100k with one job like I'm working three here and then he didn't have a house he was living in a share house and I just thought what's what's going on here like

how are we so different but how am I so like invested in you like how are you the person that I really like and now is my husband yeah yeah you're like what the hell I want someone more financially stable but I'm in love with someone who's not. What the heck? Exactly. Classic stitch up. Yeah, I know, right? I know. Luckily, he's not a leech but... Okay. No, that's good. That's good. Like a lack of financial literacy is fine. We can teach that. Being a leech, that's a personality trait. Exactly. So, then yeah, he kind of lived with me and my sister, still paid rent at his place and then he was a real big motivator in like saving like he was he was almost like a girl's girl like he'd be like oh you're saving like you gotta gotta like look at this we're

not gonna go out for dinner because you know I don't want you to spend that money because we're saving like you've got this house you're doing so good like you're so proud of me even though it didn't have anything to do with him and like he'd help me make selections you to achieve your goal and that's really sweet yeah it was really nice he was like my biggest fan aside from my dad like he was I was about to say does he and your dad get along really well they do they do yeah yeah like a house on fire huh yes he's the son that my dad never got oh lucky lucky I feel like that's my husband and my dad like I'll lean over and my my husband's cackling on the couch I'm like what are you laughing at and he'll be like oh I'm just

texting Eric and I'll be like yeah okay like no worries yeah or they they hang out with your husband more than they hang out with you sometimes and you're like oh yeah I'm the child I'm your child not him sometimes I get invited as a plus one to do things yes yeah yeah sometimes Steve will be like oh we're doing x with your parents this weekend and I'll be like that's news to me love that I mean it's so sweet but I understand at the start being like uh am I marrying my father It is a worry sometimes. It definitely is. You know what? Not mad. Not mad. Dad set the bar. He has. He has. And yes, they get on very, very well.

I love that. And so then fast forward. Then we moved into that house and he came along with me. And six weeks later, we were pregnant with our first child. Stop it. That's, hold on. Is that, obviously we love having kids, but was that a purposeful pregnancy or like were you like right six weeks we're moving in we are making a baby it was more around like my job like I'd finished uni at this time I was in my job I knew that I'd qualified for maternity leave but then I knew that I was going for like a promotion at a certain time so then I needed to like either have a baby pre-promotion and pre-wedding because I didn't

want to be pregnant at my wedding even though there's nothing wrong with that it was just my choice. No, it's funny because we all get in our head just how we want our story to go. Yeah. And then I was like, well, I don't really want to delay it because, you know, I kind of wanted to have kids before 30. And then wham, bam, thank you, ma'am. One hit wonder, pregnant. Okay. Nice for some. Envious. I know. I'm terribly sorry. No, don't be sorry. Never be sorry. But like, all happened. I'm allowed to be a little bit envious of your success. Thank you. Thank you. How good. So have a baby. Yes, we had our baby. We had our baby. And then it wasn't until I was on maternity leave and I really started to struggle. I was so finance focused before

having a baby. And then you go on maternity leave and all of a sudden you're not like a huge breadwinner you're not you know financially like controlling the situation you're having to really budget and I just I struggled because I'd been so headstrong and then I couldn't really do much about it and I almost felt like a little bit trapped like I wasn't contributing as much anymore like I had the house it was in my name but on paper like my paycheck was less and it didn't match my husband's or my fiance at the time. But then also we thought, what do we want to do with our kids? Like, is this where we want to raise them? Like we've got a great house. It's four bedroom, two living spaces, like a nice backyard. It was enough to, we could have three

kids there, but I just wanted space. I wanted my kids to grow up with land to run around. I didn't like that the area was getting so busy. And we started looking at regional properties and regional land and seeing if that was an option for us. We eventually nailed it down to one little town that we liked. It was close enough to the city where we were both working, but it was far enough out that it wasn't traffic and noise and chaos. And we spoke to our broker. We just said, is this possible? This is what we're looking at. We found this land. It was for 500,000. I said, we can't pay that. We can't afford that. And it sat there for ages. And I kept watching the listing every few weeks and it started at 500K. Then it went down to 450K. And then it went

down to vendor wants to sell before Christmas. Ah, I see. Would you like to chat? Yes. But I was like a bombshell is not ready to enter the village just yet no no we're not ready no I let Christmas pass and it was still there and then it changed to open to offers stop it and we jumped on it that was a thousand percent made for you that's what I think it's just meant to be and we offered 330k and they said it's not quite there and we offered 350 with a 60-day settlement and it was done. Oh my goodness. They took it and we instantly wiped off $150,000 off the land price. And we just bought under two acres. It was amazing. Two acres. That is gorgeous. Yeah. So we were stoked and our mortgage broker was like, you can keep your house

and you can buy this lounge. So we didn't have to get rid of it on the condition that I went back to work. Yeah. Okay. And then you were like, I'll go back to work. No worries. Cause I'm going to own two properties. Yeah. So our daughter was eight months old and between my dad having set days off and childcare, we made it work. Stop. Your dad helped? Yes. Of course he did. I should have known. So yes, he chipped in. He was like the third parent. It was amazing. I'm obsessed with your dad. I just, I'm so glad you had him. It was good. And then came the decision of putting a house on our land. We wanted this country ranch style house. I had this huge 100 meter frontage block that I was like, I can't put this tiny little 15 meter frontage house on. So we went

looking and it just didn't seem like it was an option, unfortunately. And I sat down with my husband and I said, look, I don't know what to do, but this is our dream. I really want our kids to grow up running around living their best life having a means to whatever they want neighbors down the road that we don't have to worry about with cars passing by and he he turned around and said whatever you want to do it's your choice and then we sold my first house stop it see your husband's a girl's girl as well he is and it was it was bittersweet you know it was my first time I would have loved to have held onto it. But fortunate enough that COVID made where we live, we were that first town just on the outside of Metro Melbourne. So we were classed as regional.

So during COVID, it absolutely boomed. So I made about $280,000 from the sale of my house. Oh my God. I'm so happy. I'm so happy for you. So it was worth it. And we put that money straight back into building our dream home. Stop. And then did you get your dream home? What happened? What happened? My Hex debt came back to haunt me. Ah, rude. I know. So I cleared it with the sale of the house and then we put about $250,000 into our forever home. We put all the bells and whistles in it that we wanted. It's our dream home. We

got our cathedral ceilings. We got our red bricks. We've got our, you know, rail and post front fence. We've got 20 chickens roaming around the backyard because it's so, so much space. And, you know, seeing that come to life was great. But as soon as we moved into our new house, three months later, we were pregnant with our second. I love this journey of like pregnancy ease for you. But also sometimes it's just nice when things don't happen immediately. Exactly.

It just seems every time I buy a house or make a big financial decision, we get pregnant. Oh, well, now, you know, if there's a third on the way, you're like, oh my God, we bought an investment property. I'm going to call you up and be like, watch out. Yeah, true, true, true. But yeah, now we have our dream home. We have everything we want in it. We budget accordingly with our mortgage. We have savings that we contribute to. We have financial goals and financial planning that was just never a thing like our first big achievement was getting this dream home and we just really made it work by crunching numbers figuring out what we could do what we couldn't do what was within our means and now we have this beautiful

home with our two daughters that we can't wait to see them grow up and hopefully one day they bring their kids home to this home and it stays with us forever so yeah that's the coolest thing ever and the coolest thing about this is that you did that on your own like you hustled and I know that your dad helped out a little bit with some cash here and there like that was a surprise but like that's not what makes this story like the fact that you did that on your own as a single girl in her what you said before girl boss era you're like how hard could it be boys do it like I'm obsessed I'm just I'm such a girl's girl I love empowering women and seeing women succeed like it makes me proud even though it's not my story half the time and oh my goodness don't

that's me that's me and like I have to backtrack a little bit because I'll say to somebody like you I'll be like oh my god money dosed I'm so proud of you and then I have to step back and go like I'm proud of you but I didn't have anything to do with this but like I just thanks for letting me in on the journey I suppose yeah like you're just emotionally invested in something that's not to do with you and then you're like why am I so emotional about this but you're just so it's so exciting seeing women succeed and having this now like my younger a sister, didn't think she could have it. And the amount of times I was like, I did it. You can do it. Like, like we can do this. Let's do it. Like, I'll help you. Like I'll sit down and she'll call

me and be like, I need to work out my budget. And I'm like, let's do it. Come on over. I'll get a spreadsheet going. We'll get this going. We'll see where you're going wrong, what we can do, what can be done better, where things are going wrong. And it's, it's so much fun and finances are fun to talk about now, I think. Yeah. If you can reframe them as empowerment, I think that it opens an entire world up for you to thrive in. And like, it's just so fun helping other people thrive. Like it's as though like people will say sometimes, and obviously I do this a lot. It happens to be my career, but people will say, oh my God, Victoria, like, I can't believe like you, you did that for me. That's so nice. And I'll be like, I don't know

how to tell you this but I almost can guarantee that I got more out of this than you did like yeah like I do my girlfriend's budget still in fact right after this money diary I've got one of my girlfriends coming over because she was like oh V hey could you like send me a budget template and I was like no queen you're one of my best friends come over and I'll just do it for you but like I know she's going to be grateful and that's really nice but I just get so much more out of it than I think even she will, because I'm just like, oh, like being able to put you in a better position and help. Like, oh, I love it. Numbers are so attractive. Like, yeah. Exactly. Exactly. So money, Darius, let's talk more numbers. What do you do for work? How much do you

earn nowadays? So I am a registered nurse. Love. So that's what you did at uni again. That is what I did at uni. And I'm incredibly fortunate with the position that I'm in that I earn about two and a half grand gross before tax a week very cool but also I don't know would you say that someone's fortunate if they hustled and worked their way there is that fortune or is that hard work I've landed in I used to be hospital nursing and I have a girl's girl of a neighbor who was like hey girl come work at the prison with me we're short nurses so I earn quite a lot more than other nurses so my gross is probably around 130 140 okay but you also you also take more risk than a lot of other nurses I do I do but it is

enjoyable it's hard to bite your tongue sometimes but um we're there for health care and I just have to remind myself that I get to go home to my family at night. Oh yeah. I don't know how I think I would really struggle with that. Like sometimes I would, yeah, really struggle with that. Money Darius, tell me, we need to be pervy because like you've built your dream life basically. What does your husband, now husband earn? So he takes home around three grand a fortnight. He's on just over a hundred. So between the two of us, we bring in about six and a half thousand a fortnight. I'm obsessed. I love this. I love this so much. Tell me what's your big money goal? What are you guys currently working towards? We would absolutely love to get our landscaping

done. It's quite a big job. Isn't it crazy how much more expensive landscaping is than you think it's going to be? It's insane. Absolutely insane. But we also, when we bought this land, we wanted space because I know that my dad doesn't want to go to a nursing home when he's older. So we will be putting a granny flat on our land. Cute. And he can live there. And I want my kids to grow up with their grandparents as much as they possibly can. That's so sweet. You are literally so sweet, but also I'm pretty sure that means you might get a built-in gardener. Like that's pretty cool. Probably. I would say so. I would say so. Like we don't want to put the cart before the horse, but I feel like I know your dad well enough now, you know? Yes. He built our chicken

coop with my husband. So we definitely will have a garden there in the midst. There you go. All right, Money Diaries, let's go to a really quick break. And on the flip side, we're going to be talking about investments, debt, personal insurance, and your best and worst money habits. So guys, don't go anywhere. All right, Money Diaries, we are back and I want to talk investments. in your letter in, you mentioned that you have some investments. What are they? How did you start? Why did you start? What does it look like? So I have my super like most other people, and that is sitting at $124,000 currently. I also have a raise investing account, which I got onto because of shoes on the money when I started deep diving into all the podcasts.

and that has about four thousand eight hundred dollars in it oh okay yeah just from contributing like twenty dollars here and there and top ups so yeah that's kind of starting to add up and then we also have savings accounts for our two children which our first daughter has about four thousand dollars in it and that is invested as well and then unfortunately our second we got onto that a little bit late to the game, second child things. So her savings and investing has only been up for about two months. But that's okay. Cause like she's going to have heaps of time to grow that over time. Like that's not the end of the world. She will. And if all else fails, my dad also has savings accounts for the girls. So she's probably got more in dad's savings than

now. Oh my goodness. See, I told you your dad's a girl's girl. He's got their back. He is. He definitely is. But they're our main investments at the moment. My husband used to have investments, but in our early days when we didn't quite understand investing very much, he sold them. But we have just entered into that game again in the most recent weeks. I feel like that's a really common story. If you don't understand something when you dive in, it's one of the first things to go when like, you know, you go, oh, maybe I could do something better with that money. Cause you don't fully comprehend the bigger picture at that point. Like that's fine. These things happen, but like what a good lesson to have learned

that now you're back on the train that you probably won't pull it out again. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Yeah. Listen to you. You're like, no, he will not be touching that. Exactly. Over my dead body where you take your investments out. Okay. I love that because I can't give you advice, but it sounds like you don't even need it. Money Diarist, talk to me about debt. We know that you sold your first house to fund this next house, but what type of situation are you in when it comes to mortgages? So we only have our mortgage as our debt. It is $850,000. So it is probably on the higher end,

but we also have our dream home and we pay fortnightly and pay off extra each fortnight as well. So we're hoping to just knock that down in about 20 years. I'd love to have our mortgage paid off in about 20 years. Oh, I don't know why you of all people wouldn't be able to achieve that. I've seen what you've done before. Why wouldn't it be possible in the future? Tell me about your personal insurance situation. Is that something that you've got your finger on the pulse with so it's probably my downfall we we do have health insurance having our two daughters through the private system was a value for us so we value our private health insurance I also have pet insurance because we have a sausage dog and he's already

back once so we do not need to worry about him anymore and then unfortunately it's I hate to say it but it's whatever's in my super I really need to look into like income protection and things like that because our income is probably one of the most valuable things like that's where our money comes from so like I remember listening to a podcast and you were like it's your income why wouldn't you protect that asset? And I'm like, that is so true. Well, I know. And I feel sometimes like a bit of a broken record, or maybe I feel a bit preachy. I'm not sure. But I look at it and I go, we insure our cars, like all of my friends and like everyone that I know in my community, like they wouldn't let their car insurance lapse because they all understand like that would be

silly. Like what if you got in an accident and your car got written off? Like, oh, that's crazy. You wouldn't even comprehend it, but you don't insure your income, which if that tomorrow you couldn't earn, the dream home, I'm really sorry, it's not going to last. As I've said a million times before, and I used to say a lot when I was a financial advisor, if you told me, Victoria, you can only have one type of insurance out of all the insurances, I'd give up my car insurance, I'd give up my house insurance, I'd give up everything but my income protection. Because if I can't earn an income, my entire life is going to crumble. I can buy a new car with my money that my income protection pays me, but I can't buy an income with the car that's been

protected. It makes no sense to me. Exactly. Yes, I do need to get onto my income protection. It's that little thing that just sits in the back of your mind that you know you need to do, but you're just like, oh, I forgot today. Oh, I need to get onto it. I'll give you a little prod after the show. Don't you worry. Money diarist, I want to know, when it comes to best and worst money habits, I feel like you've probably got some really good ones. Like we've already heard how good you are at putting all your money away and saving and hustling and delayed gratification. Like you let that house stay on the market or that block of land stay on the market for so long. I don't know if I have that in me. What do you think your best

money habit is? So my best money habit would have to be, I never pay for anything full price. I refuse to pay for things full price when I know that there are sales there. If I'm online shopping or needing something online, if there's like a code box where you can put in a discount code or a promo code, you can bet I will find a promo code. But then also after having two kids, I realized they grow so quickly and I had all these like really nice clothes for my girls that I started selling their clothes secondhand and there's a huge mark of people that don't want to pay full price for clothes or they're happy to buy secondhand things and then I started buying things off you know like Facebook marketplace or I'd share with my friends we had like a revolving

wardrobe and like you'd like lend something out to a friend and then it would come back after their child had used it because they might've been a bigger size or, or like they needed the use for it or they had a baby and I didn't have a baby at the time. So I refuse to pay full price for things. I'm happy for my kids to wear secondhand things, but then also I, yeah, I managed to start a little side hustle out of it by essentially like flipping clothes and kids wear things. That's so good. And it's also so true. I don't mind putting my kids in secondhand stuff. In fact, I would prefer it. Don't get me wrong. I do love a shopping moment sometimes, but I feel like kids grow so quickly that my kids literally one week fit in something,

the next week don't. I'm like, oh my goodness, if someone could just sell me a bundle of kids clothes in my kid's size, or if my friend had it, it'd just be so much easier. It is. And that's kind of how I guess I got onto it because first time mom, I was buying new things for my little one. Like the amount of Gorman in her wardrobe is ridiculous. Like absolutely ridiculous. I love that for her though. I do. What three and a half year old needs to be in Gorman? Yours apparently. Apparently mine, but I found some things on marketplace, but they were in a bundle and I only wanted the one jumper. So I bought the bundle for a hundred dollars and I ended up sending like a video message to my best friend and was like, I could resell all this.

Parents don't want to buy brand new things. I just want this one jumper. And I resold it and I went to the baby market, the local baby market and made like $1,800. Stop it. Yeah. That's iconic. And I kept the Gorman jumper for my little one. Yeah. Like, I mean, you've got to take the cream off the top. Exactly. So yeah, I started secondhand buying and it was game changer. I love that. And also I love that you made like a kind of a game, like something that you were already like, oh, I love a little secondhand moment, found this jumper I liked. Sorry, you found a way to make money off that. That's genius. Yeah. It also keeps my husband a little bit happy when the kids have so much clothes because I just

remind him that mums love secondhand things. We can resell it at a fraction of the price. Exactly. Like you're just doing him a service, honestly. Like, and also remind him we thought you were a girl's girl. Like, come on. Yes, exactly. We just need to remind him that the Gorman jumper cannot go to daycare. We've had to have a few talks about that. Oh, don't, don't, don't. I don't want to have that conversation right now. I have a bone to pick with my husband about that. And the fact that a Ralph Lauren puffer vest ended up at daycare and it now has paint on it. It's not a daycare item. Yes. But like, why don't they just see it the same way we do? Exactly. Exactly. They just never do.

And I know it's slightly out of touch that my two-year-old has a Ralph Lauren puffer vest. I'd just like to disclaimer that I bought it on super sale, more money off, was very happy with it. I also made sure I bought it in a size three because I was like, we're going to get the most wear out of this. Like a size four would have looked like he was swamped in it and wouldn't have kept him warm. So I was like, I'm going to push it, get a size three. We're going to get so much wear out of this. He's going to look so cute every weekend, not at daycare. And it made it to daycare. I was like, is this a joke? Is my life a joke to you, Steven? They just don't get it because we girl math it as well. How many wears they're going to get out of it? They're going to

get an extra year out of it. Is it a neutral color? Can the next baby wear it? Perfect. The next baby can wear it. So you're getting two for the price of one, really. Two kids, one puffer jacket. Exactly. And then you know what he hits me with? Logic. He goes, well, why would we have bought him a puffer vest that he can't just wear always? I'm like, sorry, sit down. Because we have nice outings. Exactly. And he's like, when? I don't want to hear that. Don't you question me. I will resell it. And when I make money on it, you won't be mad at me then, will you? I'm calling Money Dyrus up. She's going to have my back. Exactly. Exactly. And that's a good resell brand as well.

Exactly. It holds its value. Well, it doesn't now, Money Dyrus, does it? Because it's got green paint right on the front of it. It's got character. It's vintage. Now he looks like he's very well-dressed at daycare with paint on him a lot of the time. Because like, you're going to be wearing that to daycare now. Absolutely. You're getting the extra wear out of it now. So tell me, what's your worst money habit? My worst money habit is if you catch me on like a down day or in just one of those moods and you say, let's go for coffee.

I'm your girl. I'm at coffee or I'm at dinner or I'm at lunch. Like even last week at work, they were like, we're going to go get coffee. Who wants one? Did I account for coffee that day? I absolutely did not. Did I get coffee that day? I sure did.

But you know what? sometimes it's about enjoying the journey it is and we had great chats walking to the cafe and we just talked all things girls we actually talked about she's on the money to be completely honest that pays for itself in fact i probably owe you a coffee exactly we're talking about coffee and the we're actually talking about the monday like the money diaries on mondays and yeah we're all talking about it and then before i knew it i had my coffee in my hand and i was like four bucks out of pocket, but whatever. Hold on. Where are you getting a coffee that's only four dollars? Well, it's prison coffee. So one day it might be a dollar. The next it's like

four dollars. Like it's the cafe in the prison. What? What? Hold on. Hold on. Why is it got a floating price point? It's just whatever they charge on the day. Wait, the prisoners come up with that? No, there's offices that work there, but like the prisoners will be like learning how to like like make a coffee with like the coffee machine and like they'll do their barista course so then we just order and then whatever comes up on that f-post machine is how much it is for the day so okay some days yeah four dollars some days it's two dollars some days it's a dollar and it's like a cafe coffee okay i mean i'm not mad about who's made it or where it's come from i just i don't know if i like the the price tag shock like is it going to be double is it going

to be single? Who's making these rules? I don't know. I don't think it's ever been over $5, but if I know I've got $10 on like the splurge card, we're good. You're good. Okay. All right. I feel like I could ask you a million questions, but unfortunately I'm running out of time. Money Diarist, now that we've had a good chat today, and I feel like you've probably verbalized a lot of things that either you haven't before, you haven't spoken about in succession. Do you think that the grade you gave yourself at the start of this episode was fair? I think maybe I could edge it to a B, B plus, but I'm definitely not in A territory. Like it's different when you put it all out there and you think actually, yeah, I've done all right when you put it all together.

So yeah, I think I'll upgrade from a B minus to a B plus. We've really upgraded quickly today. I love that. And what would it take to get you to say, oh, Victoria, I think I'm an A? I think I really do need to sort out my personal insurances. Oh, that's easy. Yeah, because I know that we have the means. My husband and I, we do fortnightly date night where we do our budgeting spreadsheet and go over the numbers. We track every transaction. So I know that there's a surplus there to be able to account for personal insurance. It's just sitting down and actually doing it is the issue at the moment. I think like getting in that head

space. Do you know what's really interesting about what you've just said is you're like, oh, I know I've got like, you know, some budget set aside. We could absolutely do that. But I was talking to Phil the other day. In fact, I had him on the show a couple of weeks ago and he was saying that a lot of people come to him and expect the exact same thing that you just said. They're like, okay, I know I need to pay for this. But he rejigs their insurance inside their superannuation and a lot of the time they actually end up saving money. Yes, you could pick to have some stuff outside of superannuation, but a lot of the time you probably just have default insurances inside your superannuation fund that can be great sometimes, but sometimes

are not enough, but you can get a different policy with a different insurance company and still have it paid for through your super and therefore save money. So, even if you don't have the budget for it and you're like, oh, I don't know if I could pay for income protection outside of super. Well, you don't have to. Like it could stay inside your super and not impact your cash flow. I love that. Yeah. There's like a whole conversation around what that could look like because, you know, I feel like in this economy, we need more insurance, but we're also all a little bit apprehensive of setting it up because you're like, my budget is already hamstrung, Victoria. Like

now is not the time. Like I can afford the initial, like, you know, $400, $500 fee to see the advisor, but like, what if it's thousands a year? And I go, well, it doesn't have to be like that could all be structured inside your super. The only thing that you're not allowed inside your super to go on like a little insurance rant is trauma insurance. And that I would say is the nice to have insurance, but your income protection, your TPD and your life insurance can all sit inside your super. Lots of people already have them inside of super. And if you already have it inside of super, it might not even be working that hard for you. And you could get a better policy for cheaper somewhere else still inside that environment. So your cashflow is not impacted.

I definitely need to look into that and sort it out. A hundred percent. You need to go talk to Phil. Phil, help me out, man. I'll let him know. But do you know what? You guys are so lucky that I'm not religious because I'm preachy about insurance. Imagine if I had religion behind me as well, like no one would listen to me, which is probably a benefit for all of us. No, I think people would listen to you. Money is sexy. Talking about money and finances and empowering women, it's sexy. It's controlling and it's empowering women to take control of their own life because unfortunately, we live in a society

where, you know, there is a gender pay gap and things like that. So I think we've always got to look out for each other. So I would listen for sure. I appreciate you. And I feel like we've got each other's back. Money Diast, I wish we had more time to chat, but we have recorded for so long today. And I'm just so grateful for every minute of it, for you sharing your story, what you've been through and like everything in between. It has been an absolute pleasure. And I really hope that you and I get to cross paths in person at some point. Thank you so much. Thanks for having me it was amazing the advice shared on she's on the money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances she's on the money exists purely for educational purposes

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