She's On The Money - She Was Avoiding Her Bank App and Blowing Her Budget... Now She’s Saved $60K

Episode Date: May 18, 2025

Ever felt like you’re doing everything right with money… and still wondering where it all went? This week’s Money Diarist shares what it’s really like to feel stuck in a cycle of emotional spending, hidden purchases, and guilt — even while working hard toward big financial goals. She found herself secretly spending $500 a fortnight, avoiding her bank app, and feeling like she’d never break the habit. But with some hard truths, a little therapy, and a seriously smart savings system, she turned it around — managing to save $60,000 and start building the future she actually wanted. We also unpack life with a $1.1 million mortgage, how she’s balancing career dreams with financial goals, and yes… whether that designer handbag really counts as an “investment.” Press play, this is your reminder that even if it feels hard right now, change is always possible. Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, my name is Natasha Nabanunga-Bamblett. I'm a proud Yorta Yorta, Kernai, Wolperi and Awadjeri woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on Awadjeri country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through. As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow. Let's get into it. She's on the money. She's on the money.

hello and welcome to she's on the money the podcast that lets you be pervy about other people's money stories for educational purposes of course welcome back to another one of our Money Diaries episodes where I get the absolute pleasure of sitting down with one of our beautiful She's On The Money community members and chatting to them all about their journey. Let's jump straight into it because this week I got a message and it sounded exactly like this. Hi, She's On The Money. I recently found your podcast and have become a little bit obsessed with it. It's become my ADHD hyper-focus. If you know, you know. I have a budget and even a fancy spreadsheet. In it, we've allocated $700 per fortnight between my husband and I to spend on

whatever we like, but I normally spend 95% of that, plus about another $500 that I hide from my husband. I am full of shame, but the dopamine chasing is real, and I just don't know how to switch my thinking and focus on paying down my mortgage, which is actually our main goal. Money diarist, I am so excited to be talking about this because I think that some people are listening to this going, oh my God, relatable. Like I've got questions, but as always, I'm going to start the Money Diary in the same way I always do. Money Diarist, if I asked you to give your money habits a grade from A through to F, what grade do you think we would give them? I actually think at the moment I've risen a little and I'm A minus.

Oh, an A minus. All right. Money Diarist, I need to know. Tell me a little bit more about your money story. So growing up, my family was very frugal, like walking around the shopping center with a calculator just making sure we didn't go over budget I was always told we didn't have very much money so I never asked for anything what that sort of caused is as I became an adult all of a sudden I had things and and I was never really taught to manage my money particularly well but I met my husband when I was 17 oh my god cute we've been together for 20 years now no stop it and he was always really good with money so I tried to learn from him. In 2018, we built our first house after saving really hard. And then a few years ago,

I approached a financial advisor just because I felt like we had no insurances, had no will. My super was a mess. So I engaged with them and I hated every minute of it in the sense that they were wonderful, but they took my control away. And it was everything they were telling me was right. It was just that I didn't want to be told how much I could spend. I didn't want accountability. That's very ADHD of you. I was paying them a lot of money to give me that. So they did my will. They changed my super. They put me on income protection insurance. TPD basically just secured my life for me. And then at the start of last year, I became very mentally unwell and I required six weeks of hospitalization while I was in that hospital my financial advisor

just put on a cape and just like looked after me and my family and he did all the paperwork and I don't only ever have something slid under me for a signature and I ended up getting nine months of income protection because of him and we would have been in absolute strife without that then I was able to return to work November last year we're actually now we've sold our old house and we're building our dream house oh yeah so in the past 12 months it's been really turbulent but come out the other side oh my goodness how are you feeling now because that feels like a whirlwind and I mean I don't think anyone is ever prepared for like mental illness to take us kind of take us down like that like six weeks out for the count like that's big you can't plan these things so like

how's life now? I still have some of the I guess scars you could say. My feelings can get hurt a little bit easily. I don't have the resilience that I used to but I'm also a lot stronger in a lot of ways. I know that I can come from essentially not wanting to be alive to thriving and I'm really proud of myself for that. I am so proud of you. We haven't met in person but I already know I'm obsessed with you but also this self-awareness like for someone to be able to say yeah look my resilience is really down like I'm sorry people don't usually have that level of self-awareness about themselves to be like look my feelings can be hurt a little bit easier like most people just deny until they like that is not something that people are willingly going to admit

most of the time and if they do it's after like 20 years of therapy babe like they're like yeah actually maybe my therapist was right like my feelings do get hurt a little bit easier like do you know what I mean like that self-awareness that's iconic thanks I adore that and I mean I don't adore that you went through that but I feel like you are definitely on the right path and doing things that you know are hopefully making sure that you are thriving into the future now you said that you've recently discovered the podcast welcome to the family I'm very glad that you are here but you're also an ADHD queen and I get that like when I find a new podcast that I am obsessed with. I'm not so much a money girl, because I was a financial advisor. I'm like a

true crime girl. But you best believe I'm listening to every single one of those 700 episodes that that place has. That's basically all I'm going to live and breathe until it's done. So I kind of get that. But talk to me about your budget and your spreadsheet, because I kind of want to slip into the conversation about how you managed to find 500 bucks to hide from your husband. I just need to know, you know, asking for a friend, I suppose. my husband leaves 100 of the finances to me to pay the bills so he never checks um he trusts me so it's not really hiding it from him yes it's easy to hide when he ain't checking yeah exactly so yeah that was definitely a feeder of my shame and i've actually i had an appointment with my

therapist about three weeks ago and um she said we need to like weaponize your adhd so instead instead of chasing the dopamine change for spending, I'm going to say that I don't think you can save for six weeks. I think that you're going to buy shoes and you're going to buy clothes and I don't believe you can do it. And I was like, right. This woman is using reverse psychology and girl, it is working. I knew I was being manipulated, but I have not purchased one thing discretionary in three weeks. I'm obsessed. And then it just becomes a hyper-focus. Yes, it has.

And the issue with that is I'm such an all or nothing person. Now I'm like, do we really need that extra bag of peas? Yeah, isn't it crazy how far you go? Like, I feel like it is very hard to explain to somebody who doesn't have it. When we say we're all or nothing, like it can be to our detriment. Like, we're not just like, oh, yeah, we can like lock in on a savings goal. We can, but we're also not eating for the week. Like, we can, but also I just, sorry, I sold our house.

like there's so many things that just like, it's like we spiral, but like in the wrong direction to achieve the goal. So we might've achieved the goal, but like, sorry, we actually have nowhere to live. And I sold all our furniture on Facebook marketplace, but we did save. And I did what I told you I was going to do. Exactly. So money diarist, talk to me about that $700 per fortnight. Like, how did you come up with that? Because clearly it wasn't enough. It was actually my financial advisor came up with it doing the percentages of how much myself and my husband earn and that's what he decided was enough and honestly when I'm not being silly it is more than enough and we roll over to the next fortnight and we're able to save but it just shiny things

and new things and that lifestyle creep which I've learned about through your podcast the new job I got in November was a significant pay increase. And all of a sudden my skincare, my clothes, everything has followed it. So I'm really trying to pull that in. So tell me a bit more about you. You told me that you went back to work in November, 2024. What do you do for work? How much money do you earn? I'm a social worker and I specialize in domestic violence and sexual assault. Oh my goodness. No wonder she's so self-aware. Oh, special human being. Yes. When When they say it leads to burnout, they're not joking. I earn $117,000 a year. Wow. And is that what most social workers in that space are getting paid? Or I know you've

been in the workforce for a while. How long did it take you to achieve that income? Yeah, it's definitely not. Social workers aren't paid great, generally more around the 80 mark, but I've been in the space for 12 years now, so I've worked my way up a little. Yeah. And I'm assuming that when you said, look, I had like a mental health crisis, I'm assuming that burnout helped lead to all of that. Yes, it did. One of my clients died and I just, I was so disempowered and so sad that women keep dying and I was working as hard as I possibly could and it kept happening and I just hit a wall and it took a really really long time for me to come back with any kind of passion because it

just feels like you're running up a hill and you can never reach the peak yeah wow I'm listening to you talk and I'm just like I've like got goosebumps because I'm like oh I like I'm not on the like front line of that right like I am so privileged to get to hear these stories and you know be part of supporting our community and we hear parts of it and we definitely are a place where people do feel safe to like ask us questions about these things that they're experiencing and we have this beautiful panel of people that we refer to but like you are such a special person to be in this position to be able to give this advice and work in the domestic violence and sexual assault space and that would have been so traumatic but the fact that you care so much

oh I can't think of a better person to be in this space like can you imagine if after 12 years that didn't impact you, like, oh, I would not want to be that person. Like, you are an icon. Like, and the fact that you're back there, girl, be for real. Like, you're like, okay, cool. I've gotten over that. I have work to do. I have people to help. Like, you are one of the best people. I adore that. Like, I'm just so excited to have met you. Thank you. Tell me a bit more. Obviously, thankfully, you had income protection during that period of time that you were off work. But what are you currently, when it comes to finances, what are currently your big goals? What are you working towards? My goal is to pay off our mortgage,

which is currently $1.145 million. And I want to pay that off in 15 years. So that's going to work out to be around $70,000 a year on top of the mortgage. I need to know more because a $1.1 million mortgage is a lot of money. Does your husband or partner have a similar income? Yeah, he's on 140. Oh, very nice. Yeah. So we're just, you know, I have all my spreadsheets, my spreadsheets even have pie charts. They really help me to stay focused. And we've got little mini goals along the way because $1.1 million is a really, that's a long goal. So we have like every five years, we want to go on a really big international holiday. Every one year we want to go like to the Gold Coast or something like that. And I really want a Louis Vuitton Neverfull.

Oh, I get it. I get it. So it's just about getting that across the line somehow. Oh, it'll get across the line at some point. Like it's an investment. Like the price of those keeps going up. So if I buy it now, I'm actually saving money in the future by not buying it in the future because it would be way more expensive, right? Exactly. Go math. Give me your husband's number. I'm going to call the man up. I'll let him know. We're basically making money here. Exactly. So money diarist, are there any other big goals that you have in mind? I'm making the grand assumption that you don't have children. I do. Oh, we haven't talked about

them yet. And we don't have to talk about them specifically. I'm just interested in your cash flow. So I was like, are they double income? No kids. Do they have kids? Like how aggressive can we be on smashing this mortgage down? Like I'm just being pervy. Yes, I have a six and a 10 year old. Gorgeous. The six-year-old is a boy and is currently eating my house out. It's unbelievable how much boys eat. We have like $700 a fortnight for groceries, $2,000 a fortnight for bills. Yeah, the $700 for splurge. And then I've just started investing fortnightly too. Who are you? Tell me. I need to know a little bit more about groceries because I feel like groceries are a hot topic at the moment. And I mean, we're all feeling the pinch when we

come to the checkout. Tell me a bit more about a $700 per fortnight grocery budget. Like is that for you guys, is that bougie? Is that, you know, just cutting it fine and getting enough Weet-Bix to fuel a six-year-old? Like what does that look like? It was just enough, but since I was rudely challenged by my therapist, it has become more than enough. So where I'm currently doing my full weekly shop for about $150 a week, feeding all four people. Excuse me? Who are you? We shop predominantly at Aldi, of course. And just like little things like butchering your own chicken, that saved us heaps of money. And it was not something that ever, ever occurred to me.

And just making lunchbox snacks at home rather than buying them and just trying to be really creative. Tell me, where did you get these tips and tricks? Cause like, obviously your, your therapist sounds like an icon and was like, oh, I bet you can't do it. And you're like, oh damn it. Now I have to prove you wrong. So how did you learn about butchering your own chicken? Cause I feel like those things, lots of people are like, oh, I can't save you that much, but I actually can. Who taught you that? Or did you just decide that was a thing? No, I, I follow this Instagram page called that money mom.

Oh no, let's go find her. And she just basically talks about how she saves money and does like $50 a week challenges and gets you to follow along. So I can't do $50 a week. Absolutely. Dairy milk doesn't allow that. And we've got to like, sorry, that's for our mental health. Yes, exactly. But yeah, we've halved our bill just by being mindful and eating before we go shopping. Because if my husband goes out shopping, he always gets LCMs. It's like the warning sign that we need to leave him reaching for OCNs. I feel like that's a good thing. Like you clearly know this man well. Like mine's a slippery slope. If I take my husband shopping to the supermarket,

like we're buying everything, like not in a good way. He'll be like, oh yeah, we should get a roast chicken. I'll be like, we don't need a roast chicken. Oh yeah, we do. Anyway, let's go to a really quick break because on the flip side, I have a lot of questions because you told me just before that you are investing. And I want to know about that debt. I need to know how much your house costs to begin with. And then we're going to talk about your best and worst money habits. So guys, don't go anywhere. All right, Money Diast, we are back. And before you mentioned that you've got, you know, I think you said $700 in groceries, $2,000 in bills every fortnight, then you've got like your $700 in splurge every fortnight, but then you've started investing.

how much and in what and how did you start that journey? So we very first started investing with my financial advisor through Hub24. Oh yeah. And he recycled debt through our mortgage and we got a $100,000 investment loan and he invested that for us through Hub24. But once we wanted to buy this new house, he pivoted and said, we really need to get this mortgage down. so we took that out and it's only been since listening to you that I dabbled in shares a little bit but I didn't love it and I was trying to find a platform that worked for me and then I found Vanguard so now I invest $500 a fortnight into Vanguard All Growth. Oh I love this for you and how did you choose that like I'm just being really pervy so I do apologize but like you can't

be like, I invest in Vanguard All Growth. How did you pick that? I did a few quizzes on my risk profile. And since I've become much more educated on finance, my risk profile is actually pretty high. I have a really high tolerance. And then I just did a little bit of Googling and listened to a few podcasts and lots of people were speaking about Vanguard and that they're quite trusted. They've been in the game a really long time. So I went on their website and just went with all growth. And I made $12 today. I logged on. It's just gone up 12 bucks because of all the changes in tariffs. So that's a money win. I love that for us. I feel like Trump at the moment is definitely just playing like roller coasters with our share markets. Like the impact this man is

having is making me feel sick. Like it is actually terrifying. Anyway, we will not go on about that because it will take away the rest of the episode. I need to go back to your mortgage because I think for a lot of people hearing our mortgage is at 1.145 would make a lot of people sick like and that's cool but I need to know how much did you purchase for how much of a deposit did you need to purchase a house that big we purchased it for 1.5 oh okay queen and um we used the proceeds from the house that we sold as a deposit so it's just amazing how big prices have gotten we built house and land in Adelaide in 2018 for $500,000. And now I live in Canberra and the prices are just astronomical. So we're building again, but it's 1.5 seems to be like a discount in this state.

I feel like this is now the way of getting into property and like building our dream home. And you said earlier like, oh, my husband and I are building our dream home. And that is so flipping exciting. But I need to know more about the journey because like these days, it's not like back in the 70s and 80s where our parents could just purchase their dream home off the bat and be like oh well we ticked that box we got a family home like nowadays we're having to purchase a house you know wait for it to increase in value a little bit using the proceeds of that to get into a bigger house and like I own a mortgage-breaking business so I see this literally every day people going okay we're going from an apartment to a townhouse from a townhouse

to our dream house like it's not a linear pathway of like yep I'll just go to Victoria's business and get some finance. Talk to me about this house and land package that you purchased first. You said it was $500,000. So tell me, you purchased for $500,000 when and then what did you sell it for? So we purchased for $500,000 in 2018 and then we sold at the start of this year for $845,000. Oh my goodness. And was that when you were building your house at the time, were you like, this is our dream home or were you like this is a stepping stone like what was the thought process of like picking that location in that particular house and land package? It was just a really nice place to raise children and it was a little bit country like right on the cusp of the city and

we never ever thought we would sell but then my husband got moved to Canberra for work we've been renting while renting out that home and we were renting it for $6.50 a week which was more than we ever thought we would get out of it. But we're just tired of renting and want a house where we can put holes in the wall and do all that stuff. So we sat down with our financial advisor and just said like, can we afford to do this? And he said, yes. And it kind of went from there. But we're going to have to dispose of that asset and flip this over here and do a little bit of a backflip and then we can. Yes. Bless him. It sounds like he's got his head screwed on. Like when you said, yep, he was doing debt recycling, I was thinking, oh, that feels a bit risky for

that level of mortgage after you told me your income. And I'm thinking, okay, like no judgment, I haven't seen your plan. And then you said, yes, but my advisor told me to extinguish this, to do this. I'm like, oh, okay. Like he sounds smart. And then when you said Hub24, I was like, yeah, I used to use that platform as well when I was an advisor. And for those of you, I guess, playing along at home, Hub24 is basically a commercial version of like a shares is or a Vanguard where your financial advisor will say, oh, invest on hub 24 and your financial advisor can essentially log into the backend. And I could say, oh, you're reporting and, you know, make trades and stuff on your behalf. But then there's the client side, which

our money diarist would have been able to see. So like, it's not something that you're like, oh my God, should I have that? It's more just a like, that's usually what advisors use because it has that backend access. Money diarist, I want to know a little bit more about debt. So you just have the mortgage that you have at the moment and the plan is to get out of it ideally in 15 years? Yes. That is very exciting. Do you have any other debts? Have you ever been in other debt? When I was 19, I got a $5,000 loan to travel overseas. That was really tricky to pay down. I just didn't understand interest. I didn't understand any of it. I just wanted to go overseas, which I know you can empathize with. Oh, absolutely I can. Like, what do you mean

compound interest is basically what happens with debt. That's a bit rude. Yes. And dishonor fees, I was getting smashed with them all the time, but my husband helped me pay that down. And then we've bought a secondhand car here and there, but I've never had a credit card. My family always instilled in me that if you don't have the money, then you can't afford it. So I've never had that. And we haven't got any debt except for the house now. That is a good position to be in. I feel like having ADHD, not having a credit card is probably a very good thing because like when you're chasing that dopamine high, wait, you mean I can tap it and it's not even coming out of my bank account either? Like that $500 that you and I were talking

about before that your husband doesn't see, like that literally being on a credit card would be the worst thing for you, I think. Apple Pay is the worst thing that ever happened to my bank account. just a double click on the side of the phone and boom. You need to completely disconnect it because as a fellow ADHDer, if you make it really hard, then I don't even want to do it. Like if I have to go get my credit card, then I have to face the reality that I probably didn't want that because it wasn't worth going and finding my credit card for. Yeah, you're right. Slippery slope though, because this genius now knows her credit card numbers and her CVC like the back of hand. Yes, me too. Slippery, slippery slope. Money, Dara, I need to know though, what is your best

money habit? My best money habit is that when I have a clear goal, I'm a machine at saving. After I had my children, I had significant ab separation and I needed to have surgery to repair it, but Medicare didn't cover it. So it was going to cost $60,000. What? I know. Tony Abbott said women just want free tummy tucks. So we took it off Medicare. Oh yeah. That's totally it. Tony Abbott, you absolutely. Honestly. So in 18 months I saved $60,000 and I was earning about $60,000. Sorry. We need more info. Like how do you save 60 grand in a short period of time? Like, are you hustling? Are you doing side hustles? Are you selling your entire

like contents of your house on like marketplace? What's going on? it was just sheer determination of like we don't need the heater on put a jumper on we don't need to go visit our friends that's going to cost fuel like we just locked down and I was in a lot of discomfort a lot of the time and it was just a daily reminder of why we needed to save and so we just put our heads down and every way we could think to save money we did it we had no streaming services like we were making our pet food at home we were doing everything we could think of I am so impressed and also just like so happy that you got that. But like, I'm not going to lie, I did not know that those surgeries were so expensive. Like had no idea. In fact, I am

quite mad that that's the case because it's like, sorry, that to me sounds like an essential surgery. I know, right? Like that. Sorry, you just said that you were uncomfortable the whole time, like, and that was one of your motivations to save. Is that not a required surgery in that case to me. I agree. Anyway, I need to know, let's flip this. What is your worst money habit? My impulsivity. Instagram is, she just reads my mind and I might be talking about slippers and then slippers will pop up and then I have to have those slippers. So I'm just really impulsive. I've tried doing that 24 hour thing that you guys, I can't do it because I so badly need it right now. And so that's something that I'm really working on.

I feel like if you're in that position, I know that it's like, oh, just don't do it for 24 hours. Go put it in your notes section of your phone or put an alarm on your phone so that it doesn't feel like you're going to miss out. Cause I think that with ADHD as well, we know that we're going to forget. Like we know that that's something and you kind of, I think that's a lot of our impulsivity. Cause we know that if we don't do it right now, it's probably not going to happen. So like put an alarm in your phone at the same time tomorrow to remind you to go look at those slippers again and see if you want them. Like that way, maybe you don't feel as much like you're going to miss out. And that has historically helped me a little bit and I'm much better at it

now, but it is very hard to manage sometimes, especially when you get that dopamine high. Like how do we redirect that? Why can't it be like a dopamine high from cleaning my fridge out? Why? So rude. Marnie Durist, at the start of this episode, you said, I reckon I'm an A minus. what makes you an A minus like what would make you an A plus because it sounds like honestly you've got it pretty together I know that you're spending a bit more than your husband realizes you're spending but you're still on track to pay off your mortgage early you are still you know investing and you seem to have a really good handle of your budget and cash flow like I don't think it's as bad as I thought it might be from your diary entry I think to be an A plus it would be

being able to trust myself with my money and know that that dopamine is not more important than my values. Because that's something that really, that was the instigator of me messaging you, listening to an episode about values and looking at my bank and seeing that all the things that I buy didn't align with them. And what I really want is a safe and beautiful home for my family and to be able to afford to send my kids on school camp and all that sort of stuff. And what I was doing was going against all of that. So yeah, to become an A plus would be to trust myself and stick to my values. I'm excited for that. Cause I think that you're on the track to do that. Like, it sounds like you've got a lot of good people on your team that support you,

whether that is your family or like your therapist, like you're going to get it. And obviously your therapist knows how to push the right buttons on you. And like, I have met therapists before who just don't know what to do with me. So I'll call you after, and I think I might need her details. Marnie Durst, this has been beautiful. I feel like this episode is going to really resonate with a lot of people in our community, like not just the ADHD, but just like the sneaky spending, like maybe being able to hyper-focus on things. But then also thank you so much for sharing so much information and just like parts of your journey of like having to be hospitalized for mental health, because I think we need to talk about this so much more often

because like it is challenging but it is a reality of our situation and I'm obsessed that your financial advisor came in and was like right sit down I will organize all of this because not many and this is so good but not many people get to see their financial advisor actually in action like you would probably remember sitting down with them in initial consults and then being like look if anything happened I'd come in and make sure you're okay and you're like yeah right cool but they do right like they just fly in and go okay cool we're gonna sort this this this and this and i need you to sign here so that we can get this done and i'll call you if i need anything yeah i've told him i sent him an email and said i think that you saved my life

because without that income and without without him just taking it all it wouldn't have got done and i would have felt like i was hurting my family so i'll be forever grateful for him i'm obsessed Well, thank you so much for sharing your journey. I'm very, very grateful that I got to hear a small part of it and I know that our community is going to feel exactly the same way. Thanks, Victoria. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances.

She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs. Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of MoneySherpa PTY LTD ABN 321 649 27708 AFSL 451 289. Thanks for watching!