She's On The Money - Should you use equity in your home to buy a car? And Is Asking for Trust Fund Cash the New First-Birthday Trend?

Episode Date: October 2, 2025

Have you ever wondered if you can use home equity to buy something else you need… like a car? The low interest rate makes it sound like the ultimate hack, but would it really be the money win it feels like... or are you just turning a car loan into a decades-long debt trap? We’ve got the receipts. And just when we thought we’d seen it all, a community member slid into our DMs with a first-birthday invite that came with a twist: instead of saying no presents, it asked for something that we'd never heard of before. Is it genius, or the kind of ick that makes you want to run to Kmart for a noisy plastic toy out of spite? We’re divided, the community’s divided, and you’re definitely going to have thoughts. Of course, it wouldn’t be Friday without your fave money wins, broke tips and a sprinkle of our signature unhinged chaos to kick off the weekend.Need the team’s take on your money dilemma? Send us a voicemail here.Or if it's more of a spicy money drama and you want the communities verdict? Slide into our DMs here.  Ready for more laughs, lessons, and unhinged money chats? Check out our oh-so-bingeable Friday Drinks playlist. Listen here. Join our 400K+ She's on the Money community in our Facebook Group and on Instagram.  Acknowledgement of Country By Nartarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

My name is Natasha Bamblett, I'm a proud First Nations woman, and I'm here to acknowledge country. Tii, gulinyan ganya, nianakaka yao yinbina waka, nianakai nianbina yakarumja, duminyagumiga dumiga ithawaka nirawamundamun imalan, mumubangada bomi ininyalan waka, gaunan yakarumja, wutunarana. Hello beautiful friends. We gather on the lands of the Aboriginal people. we thank acknowledge and respect the aboriginal people's land that we're gathering on today take pleasure in all the land and respect all that you see she's on the money podcast acknowledges culture country community and connections bringing you the tools

knowledge and resources for you to thrive she's on the money she's on the money hello and welcome to she's on the money the podcast that makes personal finance fun especially on fridays my friends it is our favorite day of the week because we get to get our little team together and celebrate you our beautiful she's on the money community Miss Jessica Rich is here and she is going to be sharing our favourite money wins. Miss Bex Syed has a number of broke tips to share and we're going to be helping to answer a money dilemma. Is it a good idea to use the equity in your home to buy a car?

And something that you slid into our DMs about, being asked to contribute to a trust rather than gifts for a one-year-old's birthday party. So before we get there, because I am very interested in both of those topics, my friends how were your weeks? They've been lovely. Nothing super exciting to report. Gorgeous. Chugging along.

Yeah, loving the, we're starting to see a bit of spring now. It's nice to see the green on the trees and the flowers growing. It's the smell for me. Oh, the smell after rain, the smell of the flowers. Lovely. The smell of cut grass. Yes. Just like everybody's getting ready.

The grass is starting to grow. Oh, gorgeous. And I know it's coming into spring. Do you know why? Because my husband's complaining about having to mow the lawn more. i'll have to mow the lawn again this weekend and i'm like oh life must be so tough for you r.i.p i've been waiting a whole year to start chaos gardening i feel like we spoke about this at some point so and spring's a good time to plant a lot of things so i'm really excited i

want to go to bunnings and get like a little um planter pot that i can take with me like if i move and stuff and just plant a bunch of flowers i can cut yeah cute working on that at the moment my god well my lovely friend who i live with also she did our front garden like months ago and now we're finally starting to see the fruits of storm isn't it cute when you walk home and you're like oh there's little flowers oh my god it's so gorgeous so cute that sounds lovely and also it's almost halloween which um yeah it's very exciting we get to hear more about jess's pumpkin game i love that but we won't bring that up if you know you know i suppose yes um are you doing anything for halloween like are you excited about it i do also love any kind of theme anything that

you can dress up for celebrate so fun yeah like i'm sure i will do something i just don't know what it is yet i'm like more of a day of kind of planner yeah i'm just a vicarious halloween girl yeah i see i see like i don't organize anything i don't decorate my house but i do cost jessica um for her halloween cookies um i want pictures of her house decorations what did you do with your pumpkins this year what activities are you doing with your friends because Jess will like carve pumpkins and stuff for her friends. Yeah, you do a lot. That's really cute.

But I just want to know about it. And I'm thrilled to supply it. You're doing God's work. That is so cute. How should we fit? Honestly, good. My husband's complaining about cutting grass and I'm complaining about not that much.

So like life is good. I love that for you. But before we get into our money wins and confessions, Miss Jessica Ricci and Bec, I mean, you get to listen to them. Thank you. Would you like a five-star review? Yes, please. So this one is by Aim Jammo. I think that's the right way to introduce this person's username.

And they say five stars inspired. Loving the podcast, particularly Brooke's episode on investing. Brooke didn't send me this, by the way, but I know she's already seen this. It really inspired me to get started. I've always thought investing in the share market was only for finance gurus. And now I don't feel so overwhelmed. That's amazing. And that episode Brooke did was so good. yeah just the fact that she was so transparent around like what she owns and how she picked it I think that's the stuff like that's the grit that's the stuff that we actually learn from because we do so many episodes on like here's how to invest here's what to do and you're kind of like

what are other people doing not because you want to copy them because that would be silly uh because past performance is not a reliable indicator of future performance miss beck said But because you go, oh, well, if she can do it, well, I could do it. Totally. We're all just girls. And it turns out it's not that hard. It's not once you figure it out. No, we're amazing.

So tell me more about this amazing community, Miss Jessica Ricci. What's going on? All righty. First of this week, I've got a money win from Ant who said, I saved $636 by realizing an 8-kilogram dryer was big enough for our needs. They'd only been considering a 9-kilogram because their washing machine is 9-kilogram. and they said the best part is they paid for the dryer

by selling stuff around the house they no longer needed and still had some cash left over. Oh, that's great. I kind of just... I never thought of that. No, and it makes perfect sense that like a bigger capacity one would be, you know, quite a bit more expensive. But it's just not something that ever would cross my mind.

I also don't put everything that I wash in the dryer. Like I don't know about you guys, but like I don't enjoy doing the washing because I like put everything in the washing machine. I sort by colours and if my husband tries, he doesn't sort by colours, whole thing in our household. so I'm like doing all my whites but then my white jeans I wouldn't put through the dryer I'd like shake out and hang up but then all of my white knickers you know straight in the tumble dryer yeah so like I end up splitting it so you don't need as much space anyway genius I thought I could

have saved money yeah well now you know for next time next I've got a money win from Anna who said she was in Melbourne for work last week with her an all expenses paid trip and she didn't say hi I know, so rude. Whoa, I thought we were friends. She said all I spent was her fun money and she was still under the limit because obviously work paid for her meals and all those sorts of things while she was down. She paused her gym membership.

So basically she just existed for free for a week. That's so cool. It's like putting life on pause. Yeah, that's really cool. Take a little break. Next I've got a money win from Cara who said it pays to ask. Her internet router died and she ended up chatting to tech support from the internet provider.

A new router and mesh system was going to cost her $480. She asked them if she could use the existing mesh system that she already had and the company helped her to set it up, which meant she didn't need to buy anything new at all. So what the hell is a mesh system? I have no idea, but if she's saving money, I need to know. Absolutely, absolutely. I think it extends the Wi-Fi.

This is something my boyfriend spoke to me about and I just went, uh-huh, uh-huh, I'll just transfer you the money. Yes. But I think it extends how far the Wi-Fi reaches. I have no idea what that means, but I'm very excited that you're saving money by asking questions. Great that it was free. Next, I've got a money win from Krista, who said she was invited to model a dress which

was made of recycled materials for a sustainability conference. Oh, that's cute too. Fun. Very special. Yeah. In return, she got to attend the whole day conference for free and she got to use her professional development leave from her workplace. Oh, good.

How exciting. Yeah, the conference normally costs $295 and because she used her professional development leave. She was paid to be there. And she said on top of that, it's something she's really passionate about. So she could spend the day learning. That is actually so cool. Yeah. I would wear a dress in front of everybody. I don't even care what it looks like for $295. And lastly this week, I've got a money win from Natalie who said she recently fell in love with iced lavender matcha lattes. That's even more agriculture. So putting more agriculture in the agriculture drink. How many plants can we get in there? Absolutely not. She said normally they're

$8 to $10 a cup, which is crazy. She said it was a special occasion drink only, but after chatting with her barista, they told her that she could buy a whole bottle of the lavender syrup from them for $18 combined with $12.50 of match powder from Kohl's. She can now make her favorite drink for 76 cents. And she said she gets to feel like a smug bug drinking it at home whenever she wants. I love that for you. Like I just want people to be happy, but I just, that's one of the things I can't wrap my head around like there are a lot of things like i maybe need to make a tiktok of like people i just don't resonate with people who drink matcha for enjoyment is like number one i think you would suck to realize after you know lots of trial and error ordering different coffees

as you grow up and be like damn i actually the one i like is 11 every single day it would be really i resonate very hard because i know that like jess right you and i coffee things oh yeah but like Jess thinks coffee is disgusting so like maybe she's a macho girly and we're not like it's it's not because it's actually bad it's just because I'm opinionated and probably shouldn't be on topics that make other people happy but you live love laugh through all of that absolutely but my favorite coffee is a Mont Blanc what is that which is a iced coffee it's an iced black coffee and it usually has like an orange syrup in it and it has a like cold foam on top so like a cream vanilla cold foam usually and then it's usually topped with nutmeg and like my husband cannot

think of anything worse he's like why are you drinking a terry's chocolate orange um and like have you had a terry's chocolate orange oh that is an elite experience that should not be saved for christmas terry's chocolate orange for all all year round i say um but he says that's disgusting so like i get it that's a really expensive drink get some orange syrup and do it yourself you could you really could it's not the same at home i know well i mean this is the thing she got it direct from the people yes direct from domingo yeah give that a go affogato is good let's not let's not sleep on affogato an affogato is that hits different god it's different if you And you don't even need the liqueur, liquor, whatever they call it.

Because you know how sometimes people put the ice cream and then the shot of coffee and then like Frangelico or maybe some like Kahlua or Bailey's or something. I don't even need that. I just need the ice cream, TBH. Actually, just ice cream is good, I think. Yeah, actually, Jess would be on board with that. Just get an ice cream or like a strawberry acai refresher

is what I was going to say. If anyone has the in for that, I'd love to buy that. I don't have that. But when there is a will, there is a way. But did you see that girl, complete side note, who got sued by or threatened to be sued by Starbucks because on TikTok she was sharing all their recipes. It kind of makes sense that they probably didn't want that distributed,

but there are a lot of people that screenshot it and then put it on Reddit if hypothetically you're looking for it. Wow. Which you wouldn't because we wouldn't take advantage of international corporations like that. Definitely not. No, absolutely. That was a very good wrap, Jess, and sorry for my random tangent.

We love a tangent. Miss Bex Syed, tell me about your broke tips. So my first one comes from Jess Rickey. Sorry, we've just been crowdsourcing from our own team again. Because I was rushed today and, well, I wasn't. I just didn't prepare. And then Jess Rickey walked in with a tablecloth for a pant. I don't know if you can tell, but you made those yourself.

You actually can't tell they're tablecloths. So like if you say Jess walked in with tablecloth for pants, I think people are going to be like, giving loincloths. Yeah, it's like, Jess, do you need help? it's giving adam and eve um but that's not actually what your pants look like people started complimenting your pants and you were like guess what i made these that is yeah they look so well done i made my first pair i don't wear it at podcasts nobody can see this but i made the pants that i'm wearing my very first pair of clothing or my very first item

of clothing that i've made i think they're so nice and it's nine dollar tablecloth nine and did you have the tablecloth already i already had it yeah it cost nine dollars it's from came out it was nine dollars but yeah tablecloth I've heard people say like thrifted bed sheets are really good because you can get it for like a couple dollars a meter linen and have you eaten on those no I hadn't used it which was why because they look so clean like those spaghetti stains yeah they're very light color yeah that's crazy well that is extremely impressive and so goes to show that if you invest in a really expensive sewing machine if you do all of those things you too could make pants out of nine dollar tablecloths but you could yes sorry can we just

side note tell me about your like little sewing classes because that was also a money win yeah that is a good broke tip I think we've mentioned this before but it's through my local council you guys know I love a local council website our council does a bunch of cool like upskilling courses so there was sewing cake decorating there's also a lot of like language and maths ones and things like that obviously I was like not for me boring I want to do something fun but those are also very good available options and it's so cheap it was $50 for a 10-week course and I've now learned to sew my own pants that is really cool very exciting just found somebody who loves their local council yeah that's also great name somebody who's like I just feel so valued

and I'm here being like why don't they pick the bins up on time when I called to ask for house plans why couldn't you find them yeah yeah that's true I know so I really appreciate your take because I feel like people only like counsel when their bins aren't collected their bins broken and I never think to check so I think it's great absolutely well they're normally funded to do like lots of things for the community and I feel like nobody ever does look for them so it's true so you couldn't have sewed your pant before the course I didn't know how I had the sewing machine but like I learned and I made a lot of mistakes making them so I was very glad there was someone there I feel like that's the best investment I made such a big mistake and the fabric is not

perfect for because it's a tablecloth it's not perfect for clothing but i just had it and i liked it and so i messed something up i had to unpick the whole leg and another girl in my class bless her was like you're gonna be here all night so she took the other end of the pants and we're like do you love the pants lady in the tramp style like working our way that's actually really i would have been there all night thank goodness for her oh god i love that it's so wholesome i love that so much what else have you got beck um so thank you jess uh this next one comes from Amber, who says, I called up my bank and asked them to put me onto the promo interest rate for the savings account now that it's finally growing. A few minutes on the phone and it's done for the

next three months. What? Three months? Yeah. So I say, keep on top of a few things, local council website and also bank interest promo rates. You know, sometimes your bank will be like- You don't ask, you don't get. That's what Jess was telling us before. yes and sometimes you'll see your own bank be like for new people you get this promo whatever and you're like I've been here sitting waiting being patient no we're not giving to the new people which is great tax doesn't pay we aren't loyal it doesn't no and so I think for in these kind of situations as well you probably could call up and be like hey did you forget about me and then just call Taylor up what's the worst thing that could happen she just doesn't answer

exactly and then my broke tip I've recently gotten into ring making and I've seen on tiktok sorry not even on tiktok I don't even know if you're on tiktok sometimes but mainly sometimes mainly instagram yeah I've seen your videos on instagram guys if you're not following beck and you want some more rogue content in your life you're never gonna guess what comes next on her instagram stories thank you is that sweet like I think it's great because like sometimes i'm like oh look she's hanging out with her girlfriend that's so cute oh look she's making pottery what i didn't even know she made jewelry where is this coming i know this was just like i don't know where it came from either oh she's making a video with no pants on for a company

in brunswick like oh okay no worries like bet is wild that is so sweet thank you i follow you tenaciously they say and you are like you boost me like no one else like i know that you will be you'll be in the comments you'll be in the likes I'm always in the DMs need that I'm in your comments I'd like I love it I am obsessed I love it thank you so much but with silver rings so I I kind of was googling it for ages and I realized like on Etsy and stuff you can get whole kits for like 150 bucks which is like so that's cheaper than most of my hobbies yeah it's like fine but instead I went and there's actually this jeweler or jewelry store in Melbourne I'm sure there are equivalents elsewhere it's called kudak k-o-o-d-a-k and you can get gemstones for literally like

from 26 cents to like a few dollars yeah and i don't think they are natural i love sparkly things oh my god i'm a bowerbird i just love this um and then you can get silver clay and so you can get a five gram little bag that is like 30 you can get them either on ebay or at this actual place which is it looks like it's tiny but it will make one ring so let's say for example you are making a ring for someone for their birthday and you get three gemstones for 26 cents and they are natural gemstones maybe they lab grown sometimes but I don't understand why they're so cheap I don't really get it but put a bottle cap in it and I'm happy absolutely like I made an opal and a ruby one because that's mine and my girlfriend's birthstones and literally like

they were big they were two dollars each two dollars 26 each I can't believe it but anyway so silver clay and then you literally just fire it in your own house I do want to try this it's and it's super quick it's super easy it's so cheap and then when you if you give someone a hand made ring I would cry what a gorgeous and it's real silver too I have to know crazy so with this silver clay and this is maybe me thinking outside of the box because like my mum is obsessed with that like fingerprint jewellery so like for one of her birthdays we bought her one of those beautiful I think it's from Lyndon Cook stunning necklaces she's got this like chunky silver necklace she's got my sister's fingerprint my fingerprint my dad's

like that's what she wanted she thought it was very very cute and I also love it but like that was not cheap could you put a fingerprint into the silver clay absolutely and you could make your own like i don't know little charms for necklaces or like rings with them yes the pets too with the pet's nose print have you seen that that's so cute lucy where are you you could just get a little boop and then yeah yeah yeah that's like a beautiful little memento that's someone's business idea boob rings that is so cute you can make like little dog tags like silver dog tags like their collar so cute so you can do anything with the silver clay and it's you're meant to like torch fire it but i broke mine i don't know how and so i just literally do it over the stove

you just get some tweezers be careful and it turns into actual metal it turns to actual silver it is crazy because it still looks white you gotta like rub all the whiteness off when it's done that's fine there's a point where you touch uh anything with the clay it sounds like clay and then you do that again later on and it starts clinking you're like it's turned to silver i love science That is so crazy. We need to try this as a team activity. Yeah, it is so cool. It's a team activity at my house.

It's magical. So that is my- What was the gemstone place again, sorry? Koodak, K-O-O-D-A-K. And it's like going back in time. Like you go in there and it's very like paper bags and I don't know if that makes sense. I'm really not selling it.

No, I'm obsessed. I'm obsessed. I love it. So cool. Let's go to a really quick break, guys, because on the flip side, we're going to be answering a money dilemma. Is it a good idea to use the equity in your home

to then buy a new car? And something that slid into our DMs about being asked to contribute to a trust rather than gifts for a one-year-old's birth date, which I think is going to get a little bit divisive. So guys, don't go anywhere. Welcome back, everybody. Let's take a listen to this week's Money Dilemma. Hi there. Have you got a money dilemma you just can't solve? The She's On The Money team is here to help. Every week, we tackle your dilemmas, both big and small, to answer your most burning money, career and life questions. To get involved, simply head to our website and leave us a short

voice recording and you might just find yourself on the show. Now let's take a listen to this week's Money Dilemma. Hi, she's on the money. I've got a question about buying a new car. I'm purchasing a new car and I've been looking at interest rates for car loans and they're quite high. I currently have equity in my home loan and I'm wondering if I should use that to purchase a new car. My home loan is $350,000 and the value of my property is $1.1 million. Am I better off buying the car using the equity in my house and therefore having a lower interest rate against that loan? Or should I just keep the car and the house separate? If I take equity out of the house to purchase the car, I do plan to make extra repayments to pay that down, but it would

obviously be at a lower interest rate than if I got a car with a car loan what are your thoughts thank you um what in the wealth what sorry you only own 300 grand on a million dollar property money win well done yeah that's um I want to know before I could just dive in but like what do you reckon Jess using your equity yeah it's not something I never thought about I think the argument does make sense that if it's at a lower interest rate then it would be on a car loan I guess a loan is a loan and you're rolling it into your home loan I guess the only thing would be I don't know how it works when you use equity to make a purchase it's not a house obviously the payment terms on your home loan more often than not are around 30 years so I don't know

if they would automatically stretch I don't even need to be here because that's where my brain was going. Is that right? So like if you're going to stretch the payment out over 30 years, then obviously that's like a lot. But then she did say that she was planning on making extra payments. I don't really know how it works. Like I'm assuming it just rolls into your existing loan. It's not like you've got two separate things that you pay off. You don't. You don't. You would roll into your existing one. How are you feeling? Bec's like, if I had access to 800 grand equity, I'd be spending it. Yeah. But equity has always confused me because what I was told was that equity, you can use that as a deposit for a new house, but I didn't know you could just like

spend. Well, you can release equity as cash. So what happens is like, as you guys know, mortgage broking business, we might have a client come to us and let's use her exact example. Hey, I owe 300 grand on the property. I have, you know, $1.1 million property. Like that's what it's worth. So we would calculate that she has about $800,000 worth of equity. Now she could access some of that equity and buy new property. So you could use some of that as a house deposit. Most banks just require a reason why they're releasing some of that because they've got basically your big asset. So the bank has what's called a caveat over that $1.1 million property. So if everything went south and they're like, well, Beck didn't pay her loans back.

We're going to sell her house and get our cash back. They're not that worried, right but they do want justification as to why you're getting that money out and lots of people will you know take equity out to you know I would say most commonly buy another property so use that cash to not have to save another deposit to get into their next home or they might use that equity to buy a caravan or go on a holiday or they might buy a car whether that's the best financial decision is up for debate because you could look at it as, okay, well, I've got all of this equity and like, let's pretend your home loan is still sitting at like 5%, right? That is much lower as an interest rate. If you have to borrow money, like if you don't have the cash to pay for

the car outright, 5% is a lot lower than asset finance rates, which could be honestly anywhere they're between 8% and 15% usually. So if you just look at the interest rate, you might go, well, that's better. And that's what most of our clients do. And I'm not saying it's a bad thing, because if we are purely looking at it from a debt perspective, that's fine. But she's definitely on the right track. Because when we do this for clients, we do make the recommendation that you make additional payments, because that equity is going to be paid off over 30 years. And like, if your home loan is like 20 to 30 years left and you're borrowing 50 grand, you're potentially paying that off for decades, which means even though it's a lower interest rate right now,

it might mean paying like 80 to $100,000 in interest over the life of the loan, which then you go, well, that's dumb, even though it feels like it's a money when it's not. So what I would do is calculate, well, what monthly repayment could I afford for this car? Yes, I'm going to build it into the equity of my home yes you're right Jess in terms of it's not a separate loan it's just like additional but I'd be trying to pay off that additional in like three to five years instead of over 30 just to make sure that you're not getting stung with the long-term interest repayments which over a long time do actually add up huge amount of money 50 grand in equity on that property is genuinely going to probably cost over like a 30-year period another

80 to a hundred thousand dollars, which is obviously worse than the high interest home loan over five years. Yeah. So you need to make sure that you're making the right decision, not just going, well, it's less interest, but that's a better deal. Right. So I think that you would take, I would say a more balanced approach of, well, I want a new car. Yes. Great. That's the decision we've made. How are we now going to finance that? Can you afford additional repayments. And this person has said, yes, they can. But if you can't, I don't want you going to just take out more equity and then being like, well, it doesn't matter. I'll pay it off over 30 years. Like that's going to shoot you financially in the foot. So I think I'm a bit

conservative when it comes to that. But like the reason I'm conservative is because I just don't want you in more debt than you need to be in. No, absolutely. Yeah. Well, with equity is that I thought it was like the amount that is, let's say you buy a house for $500,000 and then it's worth a million dollars later, you have $500,000 in equity. But equity in fact is what I'm learning here is how much you've paid off. No, not necessarily. So say I spent $500,000 on house and then I have my little 20% deposit, which is a lot. I've got $100,000 in deposit. Right now I have no equity because when I look at the property value, it's worth $500,000. The equity technically would be that 20% deposit, but you can't use it because you've already paid for it. Then a year

later, I get my house revalued and it's worth $600,000. I've now got another $100,000 because I've, you know, had my 20% and there's now 30% or more equity in that. And I can actually use that cash or that value, not necessarily what you've paid off, but that value in that property to leverage you into other assets. So it's not necessarily what you've had to pay off, but it can be. So like if you paid off a heap of your mortgage and you only owed in this listener's situation, 300 grand on a million dollar property. She's got a lot of equity maybe. And we don't know her financial situation. What if she bought that house for 300 grand and then she just like bought an absolute gem and it's gone up to a million

dollars. We don't know. Or she could be the biggest, best hustler saver we've ever seen. She paid 800 grand off. Do you know what I mean? So like it could mean both things, but equity is accessible cash or capital that exists in a secure asset that you can then use for other funding purposes. It's like how it's shares you know how you say oh my share is worth a dollar but it's only worth that if you sell it like if you actualize the cost is that your house is worth that if you were to sell it. Yeah and the bank looks at that and says well the house is worth a million dollars if we were to sell it so it's pretty comfortable if we gave Beck another 50 grand because ultimately if she stopped paying her mortgage we'd sell her house out from underneath

her and we'd get our cash back so we kind of just don't mind as much which is why the interest rate is lower because that's what's called a secured asset because there's something that the bank has this caveat over that they can sell to get their money back whereas unsecured debt which is where they go oh bet show us your income show us your assets you seem like a nice person we'll give you alone what happens if you got that car stolen and it wasn't insured yeah they can't sell the car so it's unsecured i see so there's unsecured and secured debt and unsecured debt is always going to be more expensive which is why a lot of people look at their equity in a pretty favorable way i see i see well thank you for that very informative and educational response well i

don't know if this is going to get better or worse if i ask you guys do you want to hear our listener a dilemma from this week oh better yes please but I just think it's going to be a little bit juicy because I can't wait to see and I this is one of those ones where I'm like I don't know what you're going to say so we got a dm this week are you ready hi she's on the money we were recently invited to a first birthday party in lieu of gifts the parents have asked guests to contribute to the birthday baby's trust account this is the first time I've come across this as an idea is this new norm now I'm not sure how I feel about it on one hand the financial landscape is going to be hard enough for our children so whatever we can do to help but on the other hand

would love to know what you guys think I feel like if they'll like contribute to the party that we're throwing or contribute to there's something about specifically contribute to my child's future yeah I think like as long as everyone is comfortable with some people putting in literally like three dollars like right now if someone asked me to contribute to something I'd be like I literally have two dollars to give you and and that has to be treated with the exact same level of respect and gratefulness as a hundred thousand dollars it's about like what you can do what you can afford to to bring to the table if it's like a present you can kind of get away with hiding if you don't have the money you can just repurpose something in your house you can

like there are ways to do it without actually spending any money at all yeah but if someone's like can you contribute financially then that's like well that really exposes people that literally cannot do that so I don't like I totally agree yeah like I don't like that hypothetical though please because I would love to know rather than like is this and like I get it everyone's in a different financial situation and I think as a podcast we always address that but like hypothetically you've got 20 bucks and like I don't I don't know for a first birthday party like I would say presents of 20 to 50 bucks like depending on what you're doing if you're spending more than that pop-off queen but like I would say 20 to 50 bucks let's pretend you've got 20 dollars

if somebody if you were invited to like let's pretend it's my son Harvey I said Beck come to Harvey's birthday party. And then on the invite, I said, could you contribute to his trust account instead of, you know, bringing a gift and you've got 20 bucks to spend. Are you happy spending that and just putting it into his trust account? Or would you prefer to bring a present or like, you know, were you never going to bring a present? Like, what does that look like? I guess in that situation with the $20, I would be like, I'm going to stretch this and I'm going to find some, I'm going to make like a little hamper of cute toys and it'll be very impactful. But if you wanted that instead, me to put that into his trust fund, I would. The only thing, and this is

probably me projecting and I'm sure everyone out there. No, but that's what I want. That's why I'm asking you if you had 20 bucks. Well, this is where, this is where. I want the projection. I want the thoughts. This is the thing that gets tricky. And I feel like everyone who's maybe broken up poor or who, sorry, anyone who's grown up poor or is, has been poor later in life or whatever that is. There's a feeling of insecurity that should not be there. That is socialized. That is like taught to us, but which should not be there, but it's unfortunately still there. So if you said, if we all showed up with a present, everyone would feel equal. Now it's trust fund. Now you can see that I've only given $20. Now I feel like really embarrassed and it's

very visible and it's very like, you can't really hide that. And unfortunately, like same with like at weddings when you have to give money and cash and it's like, well, now I'm spending way more than I actually was going to and but if I don't then I I'm exposing myself as but it's it's if you take away all the emotion and the shame that you might feel and the projecting this insecurity like maybe you won't feel any of those things maybe you're surrounded by people who can afford the exact same as you if you take all that away it's still like funny to like I don't know maybe ask for money is like but it's more useful than a gift sometimes so I'm I'm all for it but I think there's just like it's so layered and it's so risky and you don't want to like make someone

feel like shit. So absolutely not. That's kind of where I'm at. I agree. I think the big negative is the visibility of what you're giving. Cause it's like, you can give someone a gift that is worth $50, but maybe I got it on sale and I only paid $10 for it. And it's nobody's business. It's absolutely, it's nobody's business. And like the cost of the gift is not quantifiable against the love with which it is given. But I do agree that it is like in that situation, it's like a very clear cut oh well jess gave five dollars and someone else gave fifty dollars and it's you know i can i completely agree i think that is the big negative of it the positives on it from my perspective there's a couple one as someone who doesn't have kids god it's so much

easier to just give them money than to try and figure out what to get them you know like you're a good gift giver i try to be jess for harvey's was it christmas or no it was his first birthday you got him that train so it was like a fisher price train and it's his favorite like he's obsessed with it like twain twain twain so cute all the time and also just a shout out to jessica for getting a toy that has buttons with lots of noise oh good but i did get one that you can switch the noise off love you but he knows how to turn it on but yeah so i think that like it is hard especially as kids get older as someone who doesn't have kids and like yes you obviously can ask the parents that's usually what i'll do or you know i knew that my nephew really liked that

present so I was like Harvey will probably like something similar but it is like so much easier to just go all right here's the cash it is nice to know that it will contribute to their future we know like we the three of us and the listeners too know so much the power of compounding interest so 20 bucks now in 15 years is quite a bit more so like that's nice to know and I do also think it can beat a lot of the wastefulness so I know from some of my friends they go god like obviously very grateful for the things that we get you know give some gratitude yeah what is a kid gonna do with 15 trains or like 15 new toys like they don't need it they grow out of things quickly there is an element of wastefulness there too which again the money kind of negates yeah i

personally would be fine with it yeah on the assumption and i mean i can obviously speak for my friends i know whatever amount i was to give someone they would be thankful for it would be a on issue but I also totally get the stress of like it's as you were saying similar to weddings like oh like is what I'm giving appropriate in line with everybody else like I don't want to send the wrong message by giving the wrong amount of money like that is more complex but I think like if it's a conversation that's been had or you know when I think about like your baby shower you said oh everyone bring a book if you want to give a gift like obviously gifts are not necessary but if you really want to bring something we'd love a book so I think if it was communicated

in that way like gifts are totally not necessary your presence is the present type of vibe but if you did want to contribute something we'd love to for you to contribute to their future by putting some money into shares and for us like just to give a bit more context to that for us it was not so much about like getting gifts but getting things that to me were very special to share with Harvey so like the additional context there is like we asked for your favorite childhood book Yeah. And you could have gone to Kmart and gotten a $10 book like that. Or Gabby, actually, who I speak about, I don't know a lot, but she used to be my EA and then went to work at the AFL, which I'm very proud of her for. But she's also a very good friend of mine now. She actually gifted

me the legitimate book that she had growing up that had like a few coloring in things from when she was three and drew in it. It's called Koala Lou, just so you know. And she wrote the most beautiful message in the front for Harvey being like, this was my favorite book growing up and I can't wait for you to read it. So that didn't cost her a dollar, but I would say it's one of my most prized possessions for Harvey because like, you know, everybody wrote, we asked for books in lieu of cards and gifts. And like, if you're going to write a card, please write it in the front of the book. And now whenever I'm reading to Harvey, he gets this book and I go, this one's from Jess or like this one's from Beck. And that was really, to me, really sweet, but that was what we were

looking for not everyone is in the financial position as well for a baby shower to be asking only for books you might actually need the car seat paid for and I totally get that but for me it's like I don't feel comfortable asking for gifts but that's again a personal situation and like each to their own right like yeah I guess it's the one other thing is you miss out on the sentimentality like there is something really joyful about knowing you've given something to a child and they love it it becomes their favorite toy or their favorite book that's I guess also a very selfish thing right like going oh I love knowing that I gave that to you and you love that but I love that and like I don't know I think there's something about when you talk about kids

it's also about connection and like building that connection like don't get me wrong like Jess I'm not trying to downplay it at all you gave my son a plastic train oh absolutely he's so obsessed with it and he loves it and whenever he's playing with it I'll like send Jess a picture and be like oh my god he's still on about the bloody train like and it's just like you want to feel part of their lives. And I get that you're in the background building their lives because you've contributed to their trust. But I also think that that can be complex. So I think it would be for me around the articulation of that request as like a FYI, if, if, you know, you were planning on getting a gift and like also didn't want to have to go shopping, here's our trust that we're building

up and maybe giving a bit more context, like to build Harvey's wealth in the future, or to hopefully one day get him into his first home or something or for his education or whatever it is I feel like if it was presented as an option rather than a do not bring gifts contribute to the trust kind of thing I think that changes it because you're right like you might want to show up with a gift and I think that that's you might have a gift cupboard and something you've put away yeah because I've talked about it before and maybe I could do a whole episode on how you know and again I would like to acknowledge my privilege which I feel like I am consistently doing but also don't want anyone to feel less than because this is what I'm doing, but I don't expect other

people to do it. But when Harvey was born, we established an investment bond on his behalf. And I don't even care. I'll just tell you, we put $10,000 in there because I was like, okay, cool. $10,000. And then in my head, we will probably contribute around $500 at a minimum each year. So in my head, I'm like, cool. We'll probably be able to do that. Like $250 at his birthday, $250 at Christmas kind of is where our heads were at. Is that an expectation for everybody else? Absolutely not. This is just me in the financial situation I am in going, I want it to be reasonable, but I also want to make sure that I'm building a secure financial future for Harvey. And like, we'll do this for every other child that we hopefully have in the

future. And I know that based on my ex-financial advisor predictions and projections, I should say with a $10,000 initial deposit and then just like $500 a year. By the time he's 50, he'll be worth 1.4 mil. That's a good deal. Yeah. And that's got nothing to do with inheritance. It's got nothing to do with any of that. So that's the power of it. Why? Like that's why your parents or their parents probably want you to contribute because they're like, you know, we've done the numbers and like, we're going to put this kid in the best possible financial position. But you're also asking for something that I think not everybody has at the moment and that's disposable income. And I just, I don't know, I don't like asking people for money, which is why I'm so

like passionate about like teaching you how to create your own financial security and your own financial futures. And, you know, that probably comes from my money story of, you know, not always having a lot and being like, I need to set Harvey up because what if he's in that position? And like, I don't know. Yeah. Money still makes me anxious as well. Totally. What did everybody else say? Oh, colourful, colourful. So as always, we ask a few questions before we get into the two cents. First question I asked was, how would you feel if you read this on a first birthday invitation? 38% of you said, I love it. Yeah. Because it's a she's on the money community, I reckon. Yeah. I don't know if the general consensus across Australia would be the same. 36% said it gives

me the ick. Okay. Also fair. And 26% of you said, I'm actually quite torn. We then asked, would you end up contributing to the trust? 46% of you said, yep, don't see a problem with it. 32% said, yeah, but just to avoid the drama. 11% said, no, I'd still be buying a gift. And 11%, again, same, said I would be turned off doing either of those things. You know what? I feel like each to their own. It's all part of like our money story and what we can and can't afford. I don't know. Cause like, we've just sat here. If I was asked by one of you who had a kid, I'd be like pop off queen I love this like because that's just part of my nature but then Bec you're such a gift giver and like a gift maker that I think you'd be disappointed that you didn't get that

opportunity yeah definitely so everybody's different and that's why I think it shouldn't be presented as a we aren't accepting gifts we only accept this just as a hey FYI because I don't know there might be people out there that are like oh I'll chuck 20 bucks in your trust account and I'm also going to get you a train. Like, do you know what I mean? Like, have you met grandparents? You're so extra. Like they might be all over that, but then your friends are kind of like, oh, I'm not so interested. Let's just present it as a nice option as opposed to an expectation. Absolutely. We also obviously then said, guys, what's, what's your two cents? I gave my kids shares last Christmas and I think it's a great idea. Yes. Because it was you. Yeah. Like we're

not asking other people, hey, can you please buy my kid Vanguard High Growth? Like the next person said, it's like contributing to a honeymoon fund and for me that's a no thank you. Another person said, it's awkward to ask people but I do sell unwanted gifts and then I put that money into an account for my girls. There you go. I did get for Harvey's first birthday, I, he, got three sets of the same book series.

Right. And that's the thing. And I don't know if I should be admitting this here. Actually, you know what, whatever. I re-gifted one of them and I put another one on Facebook Marketplace. Yeah. There. He got the cash, don't worry.

And technically that gift was given by Harvey to another baby. Yeah. But great book set. I shouldn't have mentioned that I liked it because three people were listening. Another person said, I'd probably be annoyed that I hadn't thought of the idea for myself and for my kids. I love that take. Another person said, can we make this the norm?

I'm turning 37 soon. I'll take shares for my birthday. thank you. Honestly, maybe I should start just gifting people shares. Another person said, well, how much a gift might spend up to $30, but I would feel like I'm not enough putting $30 into a trust. I feel like that's too much pressure. Yeah. Which I think is really aligned to what you're saying, Bec. Definitely. Another person said, first birthdays are already really weird. Kid won't even remember. Feels like a weird money grab. Again, everybody has an opinion. it's money turns out that's why it's taboo or used to be taboo to talk about and i'm just going to

share one more my baby turned one this week and you just get so much stuff i kind of wish this was an option yeah i think you're gonna get differing opinions from everybody right totally but like it's all in the communication it's all in like what feels good to you i'm not gonna lie there is nothing more heartwarming and jess you got to experience this firsthand than a tiny one year old ripping into a present and not even sure what they're doing yeah you enjoy on their face as they realize it's not just the paper that's so cute oh my god it is like so don't get me wrong like i can see the joy i can see how it might make people anxious as well but i think it's more about framing these things as an option rather than an expectation absolutely oh my god

It's like you should communicate clearly. Yeah, I would have thought. That's so weird. All right, great place to leave it, guys. Thank you so much for joining us and we hope you have the best ever weekend and we'll see you bright and early on Monday for a Money Diary. Bye, guys.

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