She's On The Money - Split Bills or Splitsville?

Episode Date: February 2, 2023

Join Victoria, Jess and Bec as they put more yay in your Friday and celebrate your money wins of the week and answer a money dilemma about the best way to pay yourself as a small business owner. PLUS this week, you slid into our DMs about 'that' friend who NEVER pays their way in a bill split situation. We've all experienced it, but how do you deal with with? Tune in to find out! Links -Profit First book - Mike MichalowiczThe Business Bible Podcast Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, my name is Natasha Nabanunga-Bamblett. I'm a proud Yorta Yorta, Kurni, Wolperi and Awadjuri woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on Awadjuri country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through. As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow. Let's get into it. She's on the money. She's on the money.

Hello and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast for millennials who want financial freedom. My friends, today is Friday, which means it is time to get the team together and celebrate you, our incredible She's on the Money community. Today, we'll be sharing our favorite money wins. We're going to be helping to answer a juicy money dilemma, which this week is all about the best way to pay yourself when you run your own business. And we unpack something that has slid into our DMs this week about friends who never pay you back. Team, hello and welcome to the show again this week. Hello. Hello. Happy Friday. Are we excited to be here? Have we had good weeks? Yeah. Yeah. You sound really convinced

on that. I can't remember anything that happened beyond yesterday. We talked about the royals, you threw a sandwich. It's been a good week. I did throw a sandwich. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It has been a good week. What about you, Jess? Yeah, nothing exciting. I went to the dentist. Did you throw a sandwich? I unpacked at the house. I didn't throw a sandwich. Yeah, how's your move going? Slowly. Because this is the first time I've ever moved a whole house before. painful like I've always had housemates up until when I moved in with my partner and obviously then we had all the stuff so when we moved out we had to move all the stuff and that turns out it sucks yeah I saw on TikTok you doing your medicine cupboard and I was like relatable content she

has an entire washing basket full of medicine cupboard stuff and I was like yeah same girl same it's painful and then do you know what's worse when you're packing up the house because I've just done the same thing yeah when you're packing up the house and you're like this requires an entire box what the hell like I went to Bunnings and bought boxes and I was like we'll need 10 10 boxes. Yeah. No, Victoria, you needed 50 boxes at a minimum. Like, what are you doing? And then just how much room stuff takes up. It's making me want to throw everything I've ever owned out because I don't need this. I don't want it. Well, you know, when you go through a miscellaneous drawer and all these things you haven't used in years, you feel like you need. So I feel for you

right now. It's the bottom drawer in my kitchen. And I took that bottom drawer off the hinges and I tipped it into a box. And then when I moved to the new house, this is how organized I am. Jess is going to be horrified because she's like the organization queen. I tipped the box into the bottom drawer in the new house. That's very clever. Thank you. Thank you here all week. If you would like some extra hair ties, some birthday sparklers or some zip ties, or I probably used batteries. That's what's in there. But it just made me feel a little bit more at home having all my junk in the rightful junk drawer. I love that saving time, saving money, saving space. I don't need to organize that stuff. I'm going to just pick up and drop off. Love it. Jess is like, I'm judging

you hardcore, Victoria. Over my dead body, but efficient. All right. Well, not over your dead body is community money wins. We love those. That is something Jess can get around. So Jess, what have you got this week for us? Some really, really good ones this week. My first money win comes from Hayley who said, money win. My kids started preschool, so my daycare fees have halved. money loss. I now have to pack her lunchbox and she eats like a grown man and my grocery bill will probably double. And she eats like a grown man. It's just like little preschooler with her oversize. You know those dumb man meals that you get in the frozen food section? The man branding, regular size? It must be black or green for men.

It kills me. It kills me. I'm like, what about that is man size? That is now just a regular size like regular size frozen meals I swear a diet size and then those quote man meal you're like that's a normal pasta serving what are you guys talking about I don't understand almost not enough exactly you've got to get the garlic bread as well though you got it yeah okay it's rude not to we all love garlic bread my next one comes from Amy who said money win started my own copy and content writing business after absolutely demolishing every episode of the business bible in the space of a week I work in local government so I'm just waiting for approval for this secondary employment, but I'm so excited for this journey. Oh my God, I love that. Do you know how many

messages I've had this week about the business Bible? People love the business Bible. I know, but like I've let it sleep. I haven't brought it back, but I feel like 2023 has been everybody's year. Like I'm hearing from everybody, they're like, you know what, this is my year. I think we're far enough out of COVID that people are like, you know what, I think I do want to change something about my circumstances, or I do want to start a side hustle, or I want to know how to, you know, run X, Y, Z. So I've probably had like four or five messages this week, which I think is a lot of messages. I know you guys will be like, Victoria, my mum texts me more than that. But five messages I reckon being like, Victoria, bring back the business Bible. It's making me

think about it. Give the people what they want, I say. I'm trying, I'm trying, but I'm a busy gal. It's true. All right. Well, my next money win this week comes from Laura who said, money win. I took my car for a service and they tried to charge me an extra $50 for special oil. Oh my God. She said, I questioned it and they said, probably should have told you first and they wrote it off straight away. Yeah. No, you guys weren't gonna tell me first, were you? No. I don't think the oil specializing beverages. No, you don't. It's like I was at the petrol station the other day. I think it was like a Caltex or something. And I was just like, you know how when you're filling your fuel tank, you mindlessly stare

off at something because you're not meant to use your phone. And I find that quite challenging, which is probably a personality defect on my behalf. But I was looking at the sign where it's like we've recently rebranded and I was like oh cute so they've like renamed their petrols and it goes from like petrol to special petrol and diesel to special diesel and I'm like but it didn't change the product and you only have one diesel why is it now special diesel I don't get it I don't get it is there a special diesel now I wonder what that looks like is it just more expensive now why is it called special diesel if anyone could tell me I'm actually genuinely excited to learn about it because they don't understand why they've rebranded the name to special.

It made me feel good putting it in my car, though. I'm like, this is clearly better than the, you know, the cow takes down the road. This is special diesel. I do. That's very impressive. Is that actually impressive? I thought I was just going to get crucified for not having a hybrid.

Oh, I mean, I don't know enough, but I would maybe one day crucify you if I know more. Yeah, okay. All right, well, you get educated and I will run. Perfect. Back on track, we have another money win here from Grace, who said, win slash loss. I finally hit my 60K savings goal, but got notified on the same day that I had to pay

$3,000 to get my visa granted. At least I'm officially a permanent resident now. Yeah, welcome, friends. I'm going to say that one's a little bit wholesome. And then I want to round it out today, ladies, with a money loss and a little bit of an update for people who've maybe heard our previous episodes. It comes from our friend TJ, and she said, hey, guys, I just found out something that might be worth mentioning on the pod.

It turns out the federal government has recently abolished the 10% hex discount rule if you've paid for your course fees up front. I just paid 90% of my fees last week to now find out I still own the remaining 10%. That's insane. That's a bit of a money loss, isn't it? That is not acceptable. And Jess, when you said it, I was like, I didn't think that was a thing. Like I haven't seen any updates. And obviously we did some little Googling and I'm currently on studyassist.gov.au and it says the HECS help upfront discount ceased on the 31st of December 2022. So I feel like that is a little bit sneaky on their behalf to have not said anything. I also think that that is quite rude given we know that CPI impacts the indexation of our HECS rates and

the fact that they know we're struggling. So it would have been nice to keep that kind of discount of like, oh, Bec, if you paid off early, like you'll get a discount. I know it sucks, but like it's the best we can do. So now if you're eligible to make a HECS slash help loan repayment, there's actually not a lot of like carrot on a stick to pay it off early. Yeah, why would you really? Because you're not getting that 10% off, which is essentially a 10% return on you paying off the debt. So it just is going to index. So yeah, frustrating, but worth keeping in mind. Worth keeping in mind, especially if you're going to go pay off your HEX debt. That's one thing I would say, I guess on the flip side, Jess, is as much as TJ, that sucks. I also would really

recommend before paying off any type of debt, calling up that person or calling up that company and saying, well, can you please calculate it if I pay it today? Because I remember when I was paying off my debt and this works in every other circumstance as well. If you pay off your debt today, maybe the interest hasn't been calculated for that week or that month yet and you paid off and then you still have outstanding amounts. So you actually need to get the final figure on the day that you're planning on paying it. And I would do that as well for your HECS help debt to make sure, okay, well, I know that, you know, when I listened to She's On The Money last year, they said I could get a 10% discount. Make sure before you actually act on anything, you triple check it

because things like this happen. They can abolish things. They can change it. The government is fluid and it sucks. It really sucks. I really wish we could help. But unfortunately, that's just not the case. Yeah. Sorry, TJ. But like paying off 90% of your help debt, that's wild. That is very impressive. It must feel good, mustn't it? That's it for this week, ladies. Oh my gosh. All right. Well, let's go to a break because when we get back from the break, I'm going to dive into the best way to pay yourself when you run your own business. And then we're also talking about a DM we got this week, which is all about friends who never pay you back. And I feel like that's a spicy topic. So don't go anywhere, guys.

All righty, back from the break and ready to jump into a juicy, juicy money dilemma this week. What have we got, you guys? Hi there. Have you got a money dilemma you just can't solve? The She's on the money team is here to help. Every week we tackle your dilemmas both big and small to answer your most burning money career and life questions. To get involved simply head to our website and leave us a short voice recording and you might just find yourself on the show. Now let's take a listen to this week's money dilemma. Hello so my question for you guys is regarding small businesses. I've worked from home since 2019 as a home hairdresser and then last year I made the move to rent a chair and work from a salon. Since moving into the salon I've felt a lot of

pressure around what I'm doing with my money because I guess I don't have the knowledge on that. So my question is what's the best way to pay myself being a small business and how much should I be putting away for super, tax, the business, savings and I guess it's different each week so I guess if you could give me a percentage of how much I should be putting away that would be amazing and any other information thank you becca i do think your best place to handle this how would you suggest she moves forward i would say blow it all on things that you don't need oh that's a good suggestion tvs mobile phones tvs and mobile phones i love that that's the first thing that you thought of that people don't need tvs not

Which is one, multiple. Several TVs, several mobile phones, and lots of takeout meals. Oh, yeah. Would be the best thing. But mainly on Uber Eats, so you have to pay the fees and stuff too, right? Yes, definitely. And so the small business doesn't get all the money either, would be ideal. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You are an inspiration. I guess that's all we have time for today, guys. But I would like to chime in because it turns out I really like talking. I feel like this is a really good position to be in. it sounds like you're absolutely killing it, but what you want to do is set up a good business cashflow system. Now I will go into it at surface level here, but on the Business Bible podcast, I did a cashflow Q&A with MYOB and I have also talked about exactly how I structure myself. So how I pay myself, how I pay my tax, how I pay my bills, how I make sure that I've got

money for payroll, et cetera. And that I think will be really helpful, but it's 38 minutes long. so I just don't think we have time to answer it in that depth. Most small business owners that I've worked with historically put aside about 30% for tax. So business tax is less than 30%, but it gives you that buffer and makes you feel really confident that if anything pops up, you've got a little bit of money to the side and there's nothing better, honestly, as a business owner at tax time when you have to pay your tax and your tax account is not empty. Like that is wild to me. I'm always like, oh, I did so well. Then when it comes to GST, it can be really helpful having a separate account for GST because GST is goods and services tax here in Australia.

It's kind of like left pocket, right pocket. If you're charging your clients or your customers GST of 10%, the company doesn't actually get that. They just pass it straight on to the government, but it does come into your account. So you need to separate it out to make sure that if you get paid GST, it does get paid. And all of that can usually be automated through an accounting software. So like MYOB or Xero or something, whatever aligns to your values and your budget. But I would recommend an accounting software just to keep on top of things. Then when it comes to personal finances as a business owner, I feel like most people really fall behind on that. So they might have nailed their tax, they might have nailed their GST,

they pay their staff, they do their super. But a really important, I guess, delineation is actually treating yourself as a staff member. So what are you getting paid? What is your super? How often are you going to commit to paying that? Maybe you just pay your own super quarterly. And once a quarter, you go in four times each year and you pay your superannuation, but it is really important to pay that. There is a book recommendation that we will put in these show notes today called Profit First, which is a bit of a backwards model that I find works really well for small businesses who need to change their mindset around paying themselves. Because if you're not flourishing, how on earth is the business flourishing? So as much as we

are told you should never take profit out for the first 10 years to build your business, like that's how it works. I feel like in 2023, that's actually really backwards and making sure that you and your family are thriving and surviving and doing well is actually going to create long term and more sustainable business. So that is where I would go. And I would make sure that I check out the Business Bible podcast because I feel like that can be really helpful because I literally tell you what bank accounts I have, how the money goes in, where it goes, what that looks like. And I feel like that could be really helpful. I mean, it's not advice because obviously you do you, run it how it works for you. It's just me explaining how I've worked it out over the years

to make sure it's as functional as possible for me because if it's in front of me I will spend it so we need to remove it. Any other tips Jess you're a freelancer how do you deal with it? I don't know if it's a little bit different for me because I obviously don't have employees or anything like that like it's just me I'm a sole trader. Yeah but you still have money coming in that you need to like pay tax on and talk about. Yeah I kind of am a fan of the overestimate rather than underestimate so I put I think between 35 and 40 percent aside for tax and that to me just means that there's a buffer like if my numbers are wrong or something like that and then at tax time it's kind of like oh I get some tax refunded even though it's technically like I had it sitting there already

so it makes you feel good exactly it makes me feel like I'm getting a refund so that's like bonus money which is great and then I do not pay myself superannuation because I work a normal job that does pay me superannuation so I you know would potentially be investing some of those funds but that's not within my super that's outside of it yeah no it's interesting to see how people who freelance on the side of a full-time job deal with their finances versus someone who their freelance is their full-time but as we've said every financial circumstance is going to be different and the way Jess manages her money versus I manage my money versus any other business owner might be different you actually just have to find a cash flow system that works but there are a few

foundational blocks like having a cash hub and then having a tax account and having a GST account and making sure that you know even in your business you have a level of an emergency fund to make sure that you're okay. I think all of that needs to be the foundations. And then after that, we can start, you know, tailoring it to make it work the best for you. But honestly, having an accountant in your back pocket is one of the best things in the entire world. Like my accountant, Louis, shout out. He never listens to my podcast because he's not my target demographic. And it turns out he's actually really financially literate. Yeah, you'd hope so. But like he's a good egg doing good things. And I know his EA,

Granier. She listens to the pod. So hello. Hi. Having someone do your tax as well, life-changing. I think I saw someone did mine for the first time last year and turns out I can claim part of my rent because I have a dedicated tax. So like talk to someone because there's a lot of stuff. I would have never known that if someone hadn't said to me, hey, did you know you can, never would have thought of it. And I want to be real pervy. How much did you spend on an accountant? Was it a lot? No, it was, I want to say like 150-ish, but then I can claim it. on tax next year. Correct. So it's actually not as bad as people seem to think it is. Money well spent, like the amount of money that she saved me. You're welcome for that referral,

by the way. Thank you so much. She's brilliant. Oh, what's her name again? No, no, no. I'll tell you offline because I don't want to bombard her. I don't want to bombard her. I already send all my friends to her. But it's one of those things that I think people assume seeing an accountant might be, you know, blowing money out of the water. But, you know, it's not actually the worst. and being able to claim it on tax the year after feels good because then you're like, oh, I'm getting a little bit more back even though I already spent it. But it's nice.

Plus I imagine the amount that you're, the extra amount that you're making through the accountant makes up for spending. And they often like think about it. An accountant works with businesses every day. So, you know, they might sit down with Jess and be like, oh, I've got another person who does freelance work similar to you and they've actually structured it like this.

Have you thought about that? And Jess might go, oh, far out and didn't even know that was an option. So I think having the right people in your team or in your court or in your corner or whatever we're going to call it is actually really constructive because the more people you have that help you leverage your business, the better. And it doesn't have to cost thousands. It could just be, you know, getting someone to do your tax once a year because you're running the financials for the rest of the year.

And that can actually be really powerful. But this is cheese on the money. Let's not go on and on about business stuff. as I said, we will consider bringing back the business Bible if people want it enough. Excellent advice, V, not that I'd expect anything less from you. If you do want to submit your money dilemma to us though, make sure you head to our website because we have this fancy little thing in there called Telby where you can automatically record it. It's so quick and easy. We'll have it linked in the show notes. So if you've got something you want to share with us, click the

link. We'd love to hear from you. All right. Now let's get into a juicy, juicy DM that slid in this week because I feel like it was very controversial when we put it up on Instagram. And if you're not following us on Instagram, you should be because we're talking about all the spicy things. We're at She's On The Money, our US. It's a 2023 news resolution for me to just be spicier in general as a human. So this is where it started. I feel like you're really succeeding, especially with this one. Do you want me to read it out? I do. Let's go. Our friend said, hey V, loving these DMs. Hopefully you can help me out this week. I have a group of girlfriends and we go and have quite a few social outings together. There is one friend in my group

who just never transfers us. If we can't split a bill, she never offers to pay and for some reason never transfers. She never offers to order the Uber and her split fare never works. I don't know how to approach this with her, but we are all getting quite fed up with it. Thoughts? Understandably fed up with it.

I'd be so frustrated. I know, and it's the use of the word never. Like I feel like I just said never, never, never, never, never, and that just makes you feel her frustration through the screen. She never does it, and then she never does this, Do you really want this friend as a friend? Because friends don't do that to friends. No.

I get the not maybe putting everybody's dinner bill on your card because not everyone can necessarily afford to foot a bill for eight people. Oh, 100%. But that's not even what we're talking about. She doesn't transfer the fringe that coughed up the dinner bill for you to pay back. Because then like they're doing you a favor by putting, let's say, a couple of hundred dollars on their card. And then if you don't pay, they've just bought you dinner for no good reason.

Oh, Jess has got it. Yeah. Plus, if they're paying for everyone, let's say five people, only three pay, that's a huge chunk. That's three times whatever that's out of your account that you're down, you know. So when it comes to those situations, if not everyone's paying, it's just such a huge amount to be paying for, you know. The system doesn't work.

It doesn't work. If you don't work, the system doesn't work. It's disrespectful. I genuinely think it's disrespectful of the friendship because Jess if you were like oh pop it on my card and I'll transfer you I'd be like okay cool no worries can I do it right now like yeah and I'm that person who has worked out pay ID and even if you haven't given me your bank details I just know that I can pay ID you the money because I just don't want to owe you anything because I just feel like that's awful it gives me the ick. Bec have you ever had this? I have had

this it's so you have I have I have it's just so awkward because how do you like how do you bring it up with your friend like it's just you know that when they they usually have the intention is what they say it seems like they seem like they have the intention to pay back but unfortunately it never comes and then like chasing that up becomes very very uncomfortable and so you end up just letting it go but how many times can you just let it go before you like owed so much money but yes it has happened to me I've had a friend like that and they how many times do you send like a follow-up of like hey Beck I haven't seen it in my account yet and they always reply like yeah, it's coming. Oh, maybe I'm with a different bank and it hasn't gone through. Like, I feel like

I don't know how to navigate that. I should. You know, it usually is like, oh, I've really genuinely forgotten to pay you back. And they are really bad at remembering. So my cutoff is about two reminders and then I'm done. And then I'm like, I'm never going to see this money again. And I just have to deal with that. But yeah, it's unfair when people do that. It's really unfair. I'm like UV. I feel so uncomfortable when someone buys me something if they don't give me their bank account details. I'm going to look up their mobile. I'll find them somehow. That money's coming back. And I wish everyone was like that. Yeah. I would pay back dinner if you paid for it, Bec. That's so nice. Thank you. Yeah. Or maybe I wouldn't. I don't know. You're getting

paid heaps now, you big dog. That's true. But it is worth mentioning because we did talk about scarcity mindset earlier this week. We did. Maybe the people out there that are really hesitant to pay people back or to split a bill or to share a bill are those who are really scared and genuinely anxious about spending money, but they still want to be included in social outings. So that's something I can understand. Yeah. Look, I can see where that's coming from, but I think that there's a line being crossed there. So like, obviously going, oh, I don't want to go out. Like, sorry, Jess, if you invited me out for dinner, like I can't come because, oh, like spending too much or whatever it is. Like, I feel like scarcity mindset in that

aspect, it's impacting only you. But the second that I go out for dinner with Jess and then I don't pay Jess back, that's financially detrimental to her. And I feel like that's really rude. That's crossing a line that shouldn't be crossed and your boundaries are yours. But like, she has done something really nice for me and paid for it because it's just easier. And I think it just is a massive test of the relationship that shouldn't have had to happen. Yeah. Like I just, yeah. If you can't afford to go out, don't. If you have no intention of paying back your friends take cash like give it to them in the moment like I can't think of and I've had

to say this before do you know what I haven't had to say it in the recent years I think it's like 10 plus years ago very university student thing I feel like thankfully I haven't got friends like that nowadays maybe because I ditched them because I don't want friends like that go figure but I remember being like oh yep so we'd go out for dinner and then I'd have like a separate group chat with a couple of people and then I'd say oh I'll post in group chat that we all bring cash because there was always that one person. So I'd be like, oh, hey, guys, like everyone bring cash, we'll pay for dinner this way.

Like how frustrating. Yeah, but frustrating because then we'd have to all get cash out because we knew if we didn't do that, this particular person wouldn't pay us back. Jess, have you been through this? How would you deal with it? Not like our friend here on a consistent basis. Like we did a big Christmas dinner, my group of friends,

and I paid, there was 12 of us. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my goodness. Big deal, which was fine. Like I volunteered. I was the one who organized it. No stress whatsoever. I have no doubt you were the one that organized it, babe.

No doubt. You would have sent them a spreadsheet guaranteed and been like, this is the menu. This is how much it's going to cost per head. You just tell me you transfer and then I will pay for the whole thing. Is that what happened? It was very democratic. We voted on the food. It was great.

But there was, we paid in couples. One couple hadn't paid me and I left it, I reckon like three or four weeks. No, you didn't. Because I was kind of like, no stress. Like it's not the end of the world and it's not like they've ever not paid me before. I was like you know what Christmas people are so busy like it really doesn't matter and then I did end up shooting my friend a message and just saying hey so sorry don't know if you've maybe transferred it and missed a number because I've done that before like got a number wrong and sent

it to the wrong person and I felt so guilty having that conversation I felt but it was like a good chunk of money I was like no I do want to follow it up but I felt so terrible and then she also felt terrible because she had just forgotten and yeah okay that's fine but it was like that thing I said to her we were both just like apologizing back and forth I was like you know what neither reverse. I want an apology here. You made a mistake. I'm just following something up. There's no bad blood. It's all good. Yeah, but that's a different story and that's so fine. Correct. I feel like if I was in this circumstance where someone owed me for five dinners or something like that, I actually would just have the conversation and say, hey, just totaled up

how much I've spent over the last five or six dinners. You owe me $300. Oh, God. Just wanted to let you know I'm not financially in the position to pay for dinner anymore without that money I feel like the way I would absorb or like soften the blow is by trying to point out what an impact that was having on me to say I can't afford to pay for your dinner because you owe me so much money like I'm now financially stressed because of you and I would hope like if you're friends with them surely that would hit home right I would hope because you actually owe no explanation for following up something that is rightfully yours. Not at all.

But if that's, you know, it sounds like she wants to have the conversation gently and kindly. And then if that didn't work, I personally would be cutting the cord, if I'm honest. Like I know that might sound a bit harsh, but it shows such a lack of respect, a lack of consideration. There's just no reason to treat a friend that way. Absolutely not.

So if they're doing it, I'd be going, well, you don't care about this friend. You clearly don't respect me. Yeah. There goes your invitation to dinner. like I'm not footing your bill, you're not invited. Yeah, 100%. And that would really, really frustrate me. Yeah. It would be the natural next step. And I wonder if it's just the one person consistently paying or if everyone in the group has to take a bit of a hit every

single time they go out. That's actually a great point. Like if you owe five different people 50 bucks, like you're running up a tab and then it's like, how do you all have the conversation? Because if you say it in a group chat, it feels a bit like a pile on almost like you owe me money and then, Bec, you jump in and go, you owe me money, and then all of a sudden sit, like, you don't want to sit. You just need to get split wise. Yeah. You need to get split wise, add it all up,

and then there's one sum that you need to pay to one direct person and it will make sense. I mean, you could also just invoice them, go the formal route and be like, hey, Bec, here's the invoice for the dinner that we had. Also, there's a late fee, and the late fee compounds on a daily basis. It's 50% of the fee. I would listen to that. I think an invoice is far more intimidating than being like, hey.

But then you're the rude friend that sent the invoice for the dinner. Yeah, you would never live that down. Yeah, you would never live that down. I would like to do it one time. It would be funny, like invoicing something for something really petty, like here's $5 because I bought you fruit tingles at the supermarket the other day because I'm obsessed with fruit tingles at the moment. Oh, yeah?

Oh, so good. But also we had some responses from our community and I thought we could read some of them out because they're kind of funny and they agree with us and I like it. So one person said, never lend money you're not willing to lose, but pour form from them a conversation needs to be had or just let her go. Someone else said, make sure you go to a place where there's split billing, which I think is smart, honestly. But even with split billing, sometimes like there's that kerfuffle at exit and maybe there's like five of you and it's just too

hard and you're like, I'll pop it on my card. Like that is your friend doing you a service. That makes sense. Like don't disrespect it because you could have just paid for it then and there, and it would have been a bill that you had to foot. Someone said, one of my sisters does this. We now just don't include her in group presents or any type of group expenses. That's like the there goes your invitation thing. It's a very little sister thing to do.

Yeah, I'll pay you. Yeah, that's said as the oldest sister. Sorry, Alex. No, no, and do you know what? Kudos to Alex. She always pays me back and I'm always surprised because I'm like, if I was a little sister, I wouldn't do that. You don't have to if you're a little sister.

No, I feel like that's the one rule that gets to jump over this. Someone said, it's a lack of respect and it means that it was never a real friendship in the first place. I think that's fair. Someone else said, honestly, I'd just stop inviting them and then drift apart and not tell them why. That's fair. No worries.

Someone said, I just sneakily get them to, quote, pay back by doing errands or chores for me. Come over. Become my lord. Become my slave. Yeah, basically. But I don't think that's the way it should go. No.

Like, no. Like, oh, Jess, I'll pay for your dinner if you mow my lawn. Like, it's just not going to work. A bartering system, baby. So I feel like the summary of all of this is basically everyone says stop inviting them, stop allowing situations like this where they owe you. Obviously, they can't be trusted with that. A lot of you have said cut the friendship because you think it is disrespectful.

But I feel like from my perspective, there needs to be a conversation that's had. And I think that, you know, you mentioned it before, Jess, you're the same as me. Like if I had to ask someone for something, I'd pitter-patter around it and go, oh my gosh, like, I don't mean to, you know, upset you, but I also need X, Y, Z. And like, I know as financially empowered women, we probably should just be more direct, but that's what makes me feel more comfortable to have that conversation. And I think it's actually okay to have conversations around money that just make you feel comfortable. Pat it out however you like, but at the same time, the conversation needs to be had. Like if someone is disrespecting a boundary, like I think a conversation around,

well, what's going on? This isn't the first time. Not a, you haven't paid me back, please do. I think I would then take it to the next step and be like, look, I just feel like this is really disrespectful. Like why is it happening? And then maybe that scarcity mindset conversation could open up and maybe that's what's going on. But if it's consistent, yeah, I don't think I'd cut them without a conversation if they meant something to me. Yeah. That's big of you. I feel like some People would find it far too awkward. It's all I've got. It's all I've got.

I feel like that's the perfect place to leave it. Yeah, I was about to say the same. We've got to go. It's Friday. Let's get out of here. Let's get out of here. And we will see you guys on Monday. Bye.

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