She's On The Money - The Party Clean Up Cough Up?

Episode Date: June 22, 2023

Join us for another fab Friday hang out where we celebrate your money wins and Bec shares her top broke tips! PLUS we answer a Money Dilemma all about reframing your skills and mindset to earn some extra cash. Plus, if you have a party and your guests make a mess, should everyone split cleaning costs? You slid into our D.Ms about this and there were feelings! Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, my name is Natasha Nabanunga-Bamblett. I'm a proud Yorta Yorta, Kernai, Wolperi and Awadjeri woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on Awadjeri country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through. As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow. Let's get into it. She's on the money. She's on the money.

hello and welcome to she's on the money the podcast for millennials who want financial freedom. Today, my friends, it's no surprise, it is Friday, which means it is time to get our little team together and celebrate you, our incredible She's On The Money community. Today, Mr. Siguri, she is going to be sharing her favorite money wins. Bec is going to be sharing her best broke tips, and we'll be helping to answer a juicy money dilemma, which this week is all about reframing your skills and getting yourself out there. We also get the opportunity to unpack something that you slid into our DMs about, which this week We're talking splitting cleaning costs after a party, which I think got a little bit spicy in

our DMs, Jess. Oh, it sure did. All right, let's check in with the team before we go any further. Bec, you're coming to us from the Sydney podcast studio. I feel like you're a weather girl. This is so weird, hey. It is very strange. What are you doing in Sydney? You've got a big dog career moment? Yeah, actually, I don't know if you know this, but I'm like rich and famous. So I'm pretty much just traveling for work. No, I'm actually traveling to see my family and friends. No friends, actually, just my family. And I've come into the Sydney office just to meet my team, some for the very first time ever. So I thought, you know, may as well just give it a go. Mid-year, right after payday, it was kind of the perfect timing. But yeah, this is very strange. I kind of like it,

though I kind of like it it's actually triggering me a little bit Jess from when we would have to record yeah every single episode remotely like I just I loved it because it was what I guess kept me going throughout COVID being able to record and hang out with you guys online but oh my gosh having you on Riverside which is like our online platform you could say for recording podcasts remotely. I'm just like, I've got FOMO. I can't even see Jess. Anyway, we'll bring her over. I'll bring her over. She can sit next to me and you can see her. Jess, has your week been just as colourful? What have you been up to? Oh, it's been a good week. I went on a little weekend getaway on the weekend. I saw that. It was arguably the most aesthetic weekend getaway I've seen in my

life. Where did you go? What did you do? So we went to Castlemaine, which I'd never been to before. I'm working with Visit Victoria to showcase some regional little spots, which was really fun. And I got to go with my bestie and have a little girls weekend. And it was just super wholesome. Like we went antiquing and had a picnic and I fed a duck from my hand. A wild duck. A wild duck. Yes. And before anyone comes to me, I didn't feed it bread. I fed it a grape cut in half, so it would be easily digestible.

I love that you know that we're at that stage where people are going to come for you for feeding the duck who bred. Yes. I didn't even know that was a thing, but the way you prefaced it, it tells me it's absolutely an issue. There is lots of discourse online, so don't worry, I did my research. Okay, thank you for feeding the duck grapes. Grapes are expensive at the moment, so that was a very big sacrifice made by you.

And locally sourced organic grapes that we bought at the market as well. Okay, well, little Miss Wholesome Aesthetic Life over there. Jeez Louise. Let's get into it, though. I really like ducks. Me too. I want a pet duck. I feel like that would be, but those like, what are they called?

like runner ducks like the big white ones with the orange beaks that look like jemima puddle duckling yes i need one of those ones the market where i got the grapes they sold chickens and i very nearly like baby chicks because it's like a regional area and people have farms i thought you were about to tell me they sold peaking duck and i'm like different different no no no i nearly brought home a little pet chicken but i thought better of it and i restrained myself that's very good restraint why didn't you buy one because i have two cats and i just feel like that might not work. Ah, I see. You can make anything work. You can make it work. I would make it work. All right. Jess, I want to know, that would have been a money loss, but I want to know what our community

have as your favorite money wins of the week. What have you wrapped up for us? So my first money win this week comes from a Chantel who said, I had my annual pay review, received a 10K per year pay rise, plus an extra week of annual leave per year. Also, I'm moving in with my partner in two weeks, so my costs will be cut in half. We've had a lot of discourse lately around the pay rise where Victoria put a video or two on the internet and we're still getting comments. Oh, my gosh.

Bec and I were recording a deep dive earlier today and we were talking about that. I was like, it's a hallmark, right? Like going viral, it's not just about views. It's about how many abusive comments you can collect in your comments section and your DMs, of which I had a plethora. Yes, thank you for that. Lovely random people on the internet.

It was literally my favourite. Like, I just laugh at them. Like, it doesn't do anything. It just tells me that you're insecure. It's true. Pop off, sis. Thanks for the engagement. They're going to come for you for that one.

Catch ya. My next money win comes from Grace who said, I was looking online for a new book to read, potentially spending $30 plus. Then I stopped and remembered my financial goals, so I drove to the library and got three books out instead. All I paid was $1.30 in parking. Money win.

What? That's so wholesome and also reminds me that libraries do indeed exist and I should utilize them and I don't. Someone told me, remember how a week or two ago we were talking about how I want to learn how to sew? Yeah. Someone told me libraries have maker studios where you can go in and access sewing machines, embroidery machines, things like that for free. I think it's only in larger CBD libraries primarily, but I got on Google and there's a couple in Melbourne and I would imagine there would be a few in other states. So if you want to sew but you don't want I spent on a sewing machine. I have a sewing machine.

You can borrow my sewing machine. I appreciate that. I was going to have Jess over, Bec, and I was going to teach her all of the basic skills because I actually did get this, year 12 textiles. Wow. Because I just really wanted to bring my score down because obviously that gets marked down.

Yeah, it turns out I can actually sew. Wholesome sewing day at VDs. I didn't say I was good. I didn't say I was good, but like you're going to get what you get and you don't get upset, right? That is very cute, very wholesome. Better than where I am right now. You can do a blanket stitch.

I don't even know what that is, so you're already a step ahead of me. Thank you. My next money win comes from Lauren, who said, I complained about a faulty product and I got myself a refund. Queen. Ended up with $100. It took me ages to get around to doing it, but in the end, it was reasonably easy and the customer service person was really helpful.

Love. What else have you got, Jess? From Angela, I have a money win that says, I had a puncture in my tire and I went to the place around the corner from my house thinking it would be $50 roughly. They ended up fixing it. Oh, money win. I thought they were going to go the other way.

That's what I thought. We always comment on how mechanics sometimes do a bit of a dodge when you're a woman. See your broken tire that we definitely can't fix. You have to buy four brand new ones is what I expected. Yeah. In fact, your whole engine has fallen out. That's so weird. Love that.

And lastly, I have a money win from Sasha who says, I got this stunning vintage wooden rocking horse for free on Facebook Marketplace. me and my three-year-old daughter are very happy and she put in a photo and I just love it when people put photos of their money wins. It's really cute. Please litter our money wins thread each and every single week with your photos. We love a photo. Even if you don't have a photo, just like post a selfie or something. I'm so here for it. Picture of your cat. I'd love a picture of your cat. Oh yes, cat tax. I believe that's called cat tax. We love a cat tax. There's a group chat with me, Gabby and Victoria called Pet Appreciation Forum and I'm not allowed to send a text until

i send a photo of my pet first yeah like group chat you need something for work great send a picture of your cat and then we'll address your concern sorry jess we're not listening yeah can't hear you we're not listening until we i need to see your pet photo i'll come hold a photo up in front of the camera for you back one second that is actually it like that's actually what happens and i'm not sorry about it it's just how our business works i wouldn't have it any other way personally me neither is that all you've got this week jessica that's everything oh my gosh well you know what that means. We get to very subtly segue straight into Bec's Broke Tips. Oh my gosh. Miss Bec Syed. What have you got this week? I've got a couple this week. I feel as though something's

biting me on the leg. So if I seem distracted, I'm so sorry. Annalisa, get out from under the table. Oh, Annalisa again. She's actually in my studio, not yours. But like, you know what, Don't let the truth get in the way of a good story. Well, that's what I was so shocked about because she's not even here and she's still biting down her leg. I don't understand. Happens all the time. Okay, so my first broke tip of this week comes from Laura

who says that they take a small bottle of water. It seems like quite a simple one, but basically you fill up your water bottle at work, which is a money win. Sorry, a broke tip. Sorry, Jess, I'm trying to steal your job again. It is a broke tip because it doesn't seem, first of all, it's great for the environment, but it doesn't seem like it costs a lot of money. But $1, $2, $3 for a bottle of water every time you're like, you know, out and about or you're on the road or

you're going to work, it adds up. It's bad for the environment. Just take yourself a reusable bottle of water and you'll save so much money in the long run. And the environment, single-use plastic is so 2023 January. Okay. The next broke tip for this week is from Amy, who says that in the winter, whenever she cooks something, she leaves the oven door slightly open or cracked all the way open after she's finished cooking, because then it warms up the whole kitchen. Maybe even if you have an open plan living area, you'll heat up the whole lounge room, the whole kitchen, the whole dining room.

Very clever. Great idea. Don't even chuck the heater on. You just open up your oven when you're done. So you cook your dinner, you got a dinner there, and you open up the oven, you heat the whole place. That's a great idea. That's very intelligent.

I genuinely never would have thought about that. And I literally in the winter sometimes stand in front of my oven with my hands over the top of it because I'm cold. So clearly I have been using it as a source of heat for not just food, but I never would have dragged it out into actually being, I guess, responsible. Very smart. Just be mindful of small children and pets, please.

Ah, that's very true. That's a really good caveat, you safety first gal. I did not even think about that at all. Unofficial erogenous partner. You know what? I reckon Jess Beck, when she was at primary school, She was that kid who dobbed on all the other kids for not wearing their hats at recess.

No, I was not, but I definitely was a bit of a teacher's pet. I'm not shocked by that. I've got to be honest. I don't think anybody is. I'm not shocked. But, yeah, no, it feels like a big waste of hot air if you're just closing the oven straight after you're done. But, anyway, so my personal broke tip for this week,

honestly, it's not going to be changing the world. It's not groundbreaking, but I basically just wanted to talk about how sometimes when I literally have like $11 left to last me the week and I've got to pay for food, food is my main priority. If anyone wants me to pay them back for dinner or if Eastlink come at me with a total invoice, I'm like, I'm sorry. I just, I'm not, I'm not doing that right now. But what I will tell you is that a cheap way to kind of make your money last or, you know, get as much food as you can for a very little amount of money. I would say, obviously, home brand, white bread, that is about a dollar. Bec, you have used this on the podcast before.

You cannot tell me that you're going to make sandwiches because you, oh, sorry, backtrack. White bread, all right. Gotcha. Okay. Did I say something about sandwiches? I thought she was like full broke tipping her broke tips by reusing a broke tip. Yeah, definitely. I feel like, Was it maybe the first one? We've definitely had the sandwiches and you can make toast. Where are you going with this, Bec? No, this one wasn't about sandwiches. This is like more of a list, a grocery list.

All right, all right. Sorry, sorry. I didn't mean to cut you off. Don't be sorry. I might actually be reusing it. No, I want to hear it. I'll savage it when you're done. I should have waited.

Let me know if this sounds too familiar. And then I was going to say, everything's home brand. Let's always assume I'm using home brand. Yeah. Bag of white rice, one kilogram. If you do have capacity, get one of those 10 kilogram ones. It'll last you a long time. I'm also saying bassa fillet.

It's a very cheap, very delicious, very nutritional piece of white fish. It's like often $6 a kilo. If you get one, two, three fillets, if you cut the fillet in half, I'm saying you're going to be hungry all week. But that very cheap fish that is also filling, also tasty, also good for you, will last you the week and it will not cost you that much money. That's really smart. And bassa when it's frozen is even cheaper and it's still good when you defrost it. Yes. Don't ask me why it's cheap. I don't want to know why it's cheap, but it is so cheap all the time. I don't think it's even

gone up in price since I was a baby. Let's not even question that. No. People in our DMs, they can worry about that. I don't want to hear why the fish is cheap. Don't tell us. We don't want to know. Don't yuck our yum. Sometimes we're asking for feedback, sometimes we're not. Sometimes we're not. That's one of those times. This time we're not.

Guarantee people still are like, I know you said you didn't want to know, but I just know it's going to be something that gives me the heebie-jeebies and keeps me up at night. I'm scared. You will ruin Bec's fish. You will. And you'll also ruin my budget for the week. But then the next thing was going to be literally just like the biggest bag

of frozen veggies you can get. I'm only talking about if you're like a single person. What, because single people, they're the only ones that eat frozen vegetables, Bec? Oh, that too. But also if your child's like, you know, the only thing they eat is nuggets. Like I'm not condoning that at all, but you can honestly buy big, giant home brand bags of frozen nuggets. It just, everything frozen, frozen is cheap.

I don't, you know, there's obviously reasons why it's cheap. It's probably not the best for you, but frozen is cheap. Bacophil, it's cheap. White rice, get all the home brand cheap, you know, things. anything that's filling, you just want to survive is what I'm trying to say. You just want to survive, which I know sounds similar. A really good tip. When you say your child will only eat frozen nuggets, are you talking about our co-host, Jessica Ricci? Yes. Yeah, that's what I thought. Can I bandwagon onto this broke tip section? Because I actually have a really cheap recipe,

but do you know what? I will put in the newsletter for today. It will be my unsolicited recommendation because you didn't ask for Victoria's broke tip, but you're getting it. and that is a recipe for dal. Dal is one of my favorite foods because it is just so tasty. It's basically like an Indian style curry that is made with lentils. And if you buy dried lentils, they are honestly cheap as chips and it can be so well seasoned and you can have that with bread. You could have it with some rice. You could have it with some frozen mashed potato if you're into the Irish guacamole. What? What is it? Not Irish guacamole? Oh my God. That's the funniest thing I've ever heard. I've never heard that phrase. Do you know what that tells me, Bec? I didn't

read the newsletter. Jessica doesn't read my newsletters. I have read it, but I haven't heard you say it before. Yeah, well, it's Irish guacamole, mashed potato. Anyway, moving on. A dal is such an easy recipe to make and you can scale it up and down for very cheap. I'm pretty sure a recipe of dahl each serve is less than 50 cents as you guys know if you read my newsletter each and every single time I put a recipe in I like literally do all of the breakdown of the ingredients how much it'll cost last week when I recommended muffins that bear collect I broke down what it would cost you at Coles and at Woolies because like I was like well what if you shop at a different place you're gonna need these if like you're gonna need this information and then I

didn't want people to cut me off and be like um you didn't account for the cinnamon and so guess what I did. Jess? You didn't. Yeah, I calculated how much cinnamon I used and costed that. It was 0.4 cents worth of cinnamon in my muffins last week. But you best believe I accounted for that because I swear every time I cook something on the internet, I'm like, oh, yep, it's just a quick three ingredient this. They're like, you didn't account for the spices and the spices, they're for the privileged. I'm like, that bowl, that bowl, you had to buy the bowl. Oh, you used muffin liners with your muffins. That wasn't accounted for. Sit down. Okay. Well, we will all work the 0.4 cents of cinnamon into our budget for that.

And we are all having at some point in the next week, Victoria's recipe for dal makhani, because it's basically like a butter chicken style dal. So it tastes like butter chicken, but there's no chicken because that's not what I would put in my recipe. And it's cheap as chips and it tastes really good and you can have it with rice and it's honestly a 10 out of 10 meal. I say it's Victoria's Dal Makhani recipe because I know that good Dal Makhani recipes exist. This isn't it.

I'm looking forward to it. It's my budget hacked up even cheaper version. Amazing. I love that. I love that. Dal Tadka. Anyway, you're the only person on the team that's allowed to make that joke.

I am. No joke, I'll make you a Dal Tadka one day. Thank you. I'm in for it. All right. With that, let's go to a really quick break. On the flip side, we're going to be talking about reframing your skills to get yourself out there and a spicy topic that has been blowing up our DMs this week about splitting cleaning costs after you host a party. So guys, don't go anywhere. Welcome back, everybody. Let's listen to this week's Money Dilemma.

Hi, lovelies. I'm hoping you can help me. I have 5K in credit card debt that I want cleared, but I'm struggling to make any progress on my 83k salary due to all the cost of living increases and constantly increasing mortgage repayments. I know I need a second income stream but am at a loss what to do. Do you have any suggestions on side hustles for a personal assistant slash admin professional? I have 20 years experience and I'm very good at my job but for some reason I lose all confidence in myself when I think about what skills I have to offer and whether anyone out there would hire me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Oh my gosh, I want to hug you. Yeah, that makes my heart sad that you're downing yourself and

your skills when you've obviously got so many years of experience behind you. And to be quite frank, lots of people with zero experience are making lots of money on the internet. So if they can do it, so can you. Yeah, like that's basically the entire segment. Thank you for coming. like there is a quote and it's not a nice quote but we're going to put it on the podcast anyway there are dumber people doing smarter things than you are yeah there you go literally and it always motivates me I'm like yeah you're right like there's no reason why I couldn't do anything that I'm putting my mind to because I feel like so many of the skills that employers look for are not something that is I guess as measurable as I guess a technical skill so like I want you

to be on time. I want you to be polite. I want you to be kind. I want you to have a really high attention to detail. None of those things come from your level of intelligence, but more from your ability to apply yourself. And I feel like this is the theme of the week. So I'm going to repeat it again because I basically want to drill it into everybody's brains. But Beck and I were recording earlier this week, a deep dive, and I said it on there. So we're going to say it again. That will come out in a couple of weeks and it will make sense to you. But having a low opinion of yourself is not humble. It is actually self-destruction. And I think that by reframing our thoughts, you could change yourself into anyone you want to be. You're a stay-at-home

mom, Jess. Great. You're out of the workforce for 20 years. You're probably looking at that going far out. I have no tangible skills. Your project management skills, elite. Your time management, oh my gosh, amazing. You can manage multiple priorities. That's fantastic. There are so many things that you do that you need to be able to see to get other people to see. And if you can't see your own value, it clouds the value that other people are able to see in you. So it is really at your own detriment if you're not seeing yourself as valuable, because I promise you are. Like reframing things is so important, but sitting down and going, well, what do I do? And your job description might be a little bit helpful but I guarantee it's not about what's on the list it's

about the things that go beyond that that are the selling points right like Jess for example if I take your job descriptions for partnerships manager at she's on the money there are all these tick boxes yeah but if you then flipped it and said Victoria what do you like about what I do at she's on the money you already know but tell me anyway absolutely but it's not that you fulfill your job description. It's that you're a kind human and that our clients really like interacting with you and you've got the ability to manage multiple priorities and still maintain ahead about you. There are so many different things that to me are really important. And the reason you have the job, yeah, you do the job like that's, you know, let's say a hygiene factor.

But I think to be able to see these things about yourself, that's when you are able to reframe your skills and put yourself out there a bit more. And I guess, you know, there are those silly quotes where, you know, sillier people are doing smarter things, like, yes, because you know what silly people have? Audacity. Yeah, for sure. You know what? I'm going to throw my own dad under the bus literally right now, guys. Dad, I love you. But this is just a really good example. Guys, look at this screenshot of a text message that my dad sent. Inspirational messages from Eric divine today it's a picture of an old guy it's a painting and it says on it when you're dead you know that you're dead the pain it's felt by others the same thing happens when you're stupid

oh my gosh dad dad that's that's a very dad-esque but it's and i'm not calling anybody stupid i just think it's all about reframing like you're a smart human being and we need to see ourselves as such. Like you have so much value, I promise you do. At the end of the day, like you genuinely are smarter than most people that do your job because you've been doing it for so long. And there's so much value in that as well. You've seen the peaks and the troughs of your industry. You have experienced lots of different challenging circumstances. You've probably had to manage multiple priorities. You've probably had to go through a lot to get where you are today. and I think it's just so important to be able to point that out I think from my perspective

that feels like a lot to swallow so if I were you and that's what my ultimate goal was to I guess put myself out there and get more work and you know change things I would actually start with this is so fluffy but a little bit of self-work like how about you sit down and talk to yourself about this like write a list of the things that you think you're good at like you can burn the list later because you might be embarrassed of all the things that you're writing down because you're like, oh my gosh, I feel like I've got so many tickets for myself by writing this. But write a list of the things that you're good at. Are you good at communicating? Are you really good at project management and time management? Are you really good at, you know, maybe whipping

together an Excel spreadsheet? It depends on who you are and what you do, but write down all of those things so that you can see them because the more you believe in yourself, the easier it is for other people to buy into that belief. Yeah, for sure. What other tips and tricks have you guys got? I would say just to her question about what side hustles she could do that were kind of admin based or focused, I would suggest getting on platforms like Fiverr or Airtasker because you can pick up really simple once-off tasks. I think especially if you're just starting to side hustle and you're fitting it in around a full-time job, it can be tricky to juggle priorities, especially when you've got other just life general things that you have to attend to. So taking on once-off

jobs here and there when you've got the time and the capacity is a really straightforward way to kind of make it work for you. And those platforms are really great. Like I remember once someone had paid me five bucks to save something to a PDF. Like there are some. No, they did not. Like, you know, and if you have any skills like video editing, I've done a lot of just like. Was it me? Thank you, Boona. That's believable. No, but it's, you know, some people who need just a video cut together. And it's a really straightforward thing if you've got the skill set or lots of times there'll be people who just need a little bit of assistance with maybe some admin management, some email management,

templating for resumes and copywriting very frequently asked for. So you can pick up once off jobs and then maybe once you build a bit of momentum up, you can offer it as a niche skill. Maybe you set up a website, but obviously that's a bit more investment and time. So getting on platforms that already exist makes it easy. You can pick and choose what you do. You can build up a bit of an existing client base and some recommendations. And then down the track, if you want to do more, you can kind of leverage off of that. Yeah. And you can kind of price yourself cheaper at the start to get some reviews. And as you get better and better reviews, you can increase your prices because you become a trusted member of that platform. Like so many times I'll

be like, oh, they're charging X for that and they have no reviews. No. But if you get a few reviews behind you, you're more likely to get that momentum in, I guess, picking up clients. And it's a very smart way of, I guess, side hustling and bringing in a little bit of extra income. And also it can build your confidence as well because if you price yourself at a point where you go yeah I know that job is providing value to somebody else I'm getting a little bit of income from it it's going to give me a really good review they give you a review you're increasing your confidence and wow like I can do that I'm going to charge five dollars more and over time that compounds and then you're charging exactly what every other freelancer would and you're feeling confident

about it so I think that that's really smart Beck where would you start what would you do Yeah, that's a really tough one and such a struggle that I feel like everyone, you know, a lot, well, not everyone, but I feel like a lot of people can relate to right now. And it's very sad that that's the situation, having to, you know, take more time out of your regular life that you want to live because you can't afford to pay for mortgage or rental or whatever the case may be. But honestly, I would just say hang in there. It's really, really poor advice.

Like I don't have advice on how to, you know, start a side hustle and kind of like get back into an industry or into an industry, but I just as a little confidence boost, you can do this and you got this and it's really, really, really sucks. And I'm proud of you for being like, you know, I will just get a side hustle and you know that it's going to like take a lot, a chunk out of your free spare time, but I'm proud of you for doing that. And I think that hopefully, eventually everything will be okay. I'm sorry, that's very useless. Good pep talk, Bec. I think that that

hits the nail on the head. I think just getting started, just try it out. Just try it out. I mean, at the end of the day, I feel like you're right, Bec. Lots of people in our community are struggling with paying their mortgage and the spiraling cost of living. And I think just put yourself out there, like you're clearly a well-articulated, smart person. And I can tell that just from a voicemail you left us. So I have no doubt that your clients would be really happy to hear from you. It's honestly, it's about confidence. Hopefully someone reaches out after listening to this and be like, hey, I've got this little thing that you can do or, you know. I agree. All right. Speaking of a little thing you can do, we had a community dilemma this week that was a little bit spicy

and very one-sided when it came to the responses from our community, which I thought was really funny because 20% of you said yes to this and 80% said absolutely not. So here is our community dilemma. This week we got a message and it sounded a little like this. Hey girls, I really need your opinion. My friend had a big group of girls over to her house for drinks on the weekend. There were about 15 to 20 of us, which was super fun. However, she's now messaged everyone asking us to transfer her money in brackets immediately to help hire a professional cleaner to clean her house. She said that there were drinks spilt on the carpet and in the kitchen and that the living area and the bathroom are now really dirty and she felt like we didn't respect her space. I don't think I should

have to pay as it was her choice to host us all knowing the consequences of the house getting dirty and I low-key feel like she's using this to get a free house clean. It's not really in my budget for this week to pay her but a lot of my friends have said they're happy to transfer and now I feel like I'm being the bad guy. What do I do? How do I say I would rather not without making this friendship awkward. Bec and Jess, what are your thoughts? What happens if I hosted a little house party and then sent you a message after and said, hey Jess, hey Bec, can you please transfer me 30 bucks because you used my house and now it's messy and yeah, I would like to hire a professional cleaner instead of cleaning it myself. This is a really a tough one because

if there is genuine like red wine stains on a white rug or something in like someone just like really came in and didn't respect your house and like broke some glasses and did all this stuff, like really destroyed it, or several people. I guess it's hard to kind of narrow down who the person was or the people were that kind of did this, but it still feels a bit like not okay. I don't know. I don't know. I guess if they just came in and made a mess, a regular normal mess, one that you might find after any gather or house party or whatever, then definitely don't pay for that. Just clean it. I don't know. It does get a little bit complicated if there's like real stains on like really expensive furniture and things like that. I just feel like if I went to

a party and I was respectful of the space and I did all the right things and then someone expected me to cover someone else's damage, I'd be pissed off. Like if you're like, if one person in the group got real messy really drunk you need to take it up with them yeah do you know what I mean and as Bec said I know that it's hard to narrow it down but I would kind of be going well if I did all of the right things why on earth should I be held responsible for the actions of somebody else and I feel like from what she said you know mess in the bathroom mess in the kitchen that is a very standard thing if you're hosting you know an evening where people are perhaps partaking in a beverage a beverage yeah you know stuff spilled on the carpet is another thing but I also think

that there are ways to clean that as well. Like, have you said, hey, like, have you just tried cleaning it? Have you used stain remover? Have you maybe messaged the group and said, hey guys, like someone spilled something on the floor. Did anyone have any ideas on how I could clean it? Maybe someone you would hope if they're good people, someone would say, oh, it was me. I'm so sorry. Let me help you. I can pay for it. Like, I just don't think it's reasonable to put that expectation on everybody unless everyone was going crazy. And as Bec said, like absolutely trashing the place but in that case why would you kind of host to begin with I don't know I don't want to victim blame here but I just think that there's probably better ways to go around it than

just immediately saying hey everybody you have to put in for this expense that you didn't expect when on some level cleanup is an expected part of hosting I feel icky about this one because obviously it's an unexpected cost that if I hosted a house party and then you messed up my house I think it's on me not on you but also what friends are you having over did you know that they would act like this like yeah I have a fair few different friends from lots of different walks of life and there are a few friends that I would be like absolutely not are they coming to my house to have a house party because they will trash this place if they you know have a few too many befranginos. And by me offering to host them, I'm opening myself up to that risk. And if you don't

want to host and you don't want to have your house essentially trashed, one, why are you hosting a party where that could get so out of hand? Like maybe don't offer your space to do that. Or maybe call out the behavior. Like if someone's being, if someone's really drunk and they're there and you're like, oh my gosh, I can see things happening. I can see that you're going crazy. maybe just nicely say to them, hey, can I get you a cab to get you home? Like, I'm just a bit worried about you. Or I just think maybe you need to sleep it off. Can I organize a lift for you or help you get home in some way? I totally agree with you. I also feel like the way this read to me was like 15 to 20 people. That's a pretty well-sized house party. Like you were planning

on having a house party where everyone was drinking. I'm assuming it wasn't like a quaint dinner party where we're all sitting around the table having out bevraginos with a like cheese platter right like by the way she was like oh there was like drinks on the carpet in the kitchen in the living area in the bathroom like yeah I don't know what type of like dinner party or house party you're having where the bathroom gets absolutely filthy like I've never had that and as you know Beck and Jess know I love entertaining like I love having people over and I feel like everyone's always respected my space like I've never been like oh the bathroom's disgusting like what are you doing in the bathroom of somebody else's house to make it disgusting so I feel like

you kind of do open yourself up to that again if it was completely out of hand I think approaching it in the same way that you did Jess where you're like maybe you should take the conversation to the group not make the decision and then go by the way you owe me money because if you're young it's very unlikely that having the amount of money in your bank account to share in a professional cleaner is a fair assumption. Like you're probably having house parties because if you're anything like young Victoria, you had a house parties because you couldn't afford to go out. Yeah. Like if you're over at my house, it's usually a budget decision, Jess. Yeah, for sure. Like it's not, yeah, I mean, I also love having people over for dinner parties, but it's, if we're having a

house party, it's because it's way too expensive to like go to a venue per se. Anyway, do we have any thoughts before we go to what the community said? No, I want to hear what everybody else had to say because I feel like we've all been very one-sided. Yeah. So that 80-20 split that I dropped before, that was to the question, do you think it's reasonable for the host to ask people to transfer her? 20% said yes. 80% of you said no. Yeah. We asked whose responsibility is it to pay for the cleaning? And 91% of you said the person who hosted the drinks. Agreed. Then we asked if you were in this situation, would you be happy to pay? 24% of you said yeah. And 76% of you said no, absolutely not. 24% of you are better people than I am. Jess would be like, get in the bin.

I'd be like, I'll come and scrub on my hands and knees and help you. But if I would actually offer divorce, I'd be like, I'll come and help you clean up. I don't want to pay. Yeah. Like if that happened in a group chat and they were like, hey, the house is literally a bomb site. It's so much worse than I'd ever anticipated. Is anyone free to help me? I'll be there. Do you want me to bring my Dyson. I've got a Dyson. Yeah. I really like showing it off. Like I'll be there. I have done that for friends in the past where they're like moving into a house and it wasn't as clean as they thought it was going to be. And I was like, oh, I got you girl. I'm really good with a toothbrush. You took the toilet seat off. I remember that. Yes. I'm very good at that. Anyway,

moving forward to what the community said, someone said, ask for pics of the mess and offer to help her clean, which I think is good. Someone said, I've hosted parties and had plenty you've messed a clean up, that's the risk you're taking when you decide to host. Someone said, if it's a really reasonable amount, I don't see the issue in paying. Demanding it though is not an okay thing to do. Someone said, I've had parties and accepted clean up is just a part of it. My friends helped tidy on the night of though after we finished partying, which was more than enough help. Yeah, my friends do that too. I feel like I would never leave somebody's home without being like, oh, let me help stack the dishwasher. Let me like wipe down the bench. Like, I don't

know maybe we're just different people cut from I mean again maybe you're trashed like I'm thinking back to like 1920 when you're like stumbling out of a house party and you don't know oh yeah you know if you're an Arthur or Martha but like it's one of those things where I think that if that's the case again there's just a nicer way to go about it like this it feels very aggressive it does feel aggressive yeah someone said if you're hosting and then expecting any type of compensation you need to be clear to everybody before you invite them and they turn up to your house yeah a few other people said no way host pays someone else said it sounds like the guests were completely disrespectful to warrant a cleaning which is totally fair girl that friend needs to

pull their head in is what someone else is like to the point if you're disrespecting someone's space when you go into it what are you doing like i get getting really drunk but like drunk me yeah she's not messing up your house i've never been so drunk that i've forgotten all my morals and no yeah like I would definitely still be cleaning up after myself well if it's a house party I certainly bounce but yeah I would never be you know trying to disrespect someone's space I get that and someone else said if I was the one who spilled alcohol on the carpet I would 100% offer to pay for cleaning the carpet and I guess that goes the flip way where it's like if you know that that person is the one that spilled the red wine I feel like that's who

you should be having a chat to not necessarily Jess and Bec who were very respectful of your space and didn't do anything and were therefore like going to be a bit like oh I don't want to come to your next house party that was a really awkward weird situation like yeah I'd prefer to not be involved next time like which I think would be a fair outcome like if I bill you after coming to my house party you're gonna be like I'm not coming back let's probably end it there because I feel like this is a done and dusted topic. Everyone seems to be in agreement. In agreement, but also a bit like we needed more context.

More context. I don't know. Between 15 to 20 people, is it $5 per head or is it $50 per head? Yeah, exactly. Well, if 30 bucks a person, a professional clean would run you between $150 and $300, I would say, for an average carpet clean, depending on the space. That would be such a good side hustle.

It would be a really good side hustle. There you go. File that one away for later, the person who wrote in earlier. Yeah, genius. I'll clean up after your party for 300 bucks. Absolutely. Money win. Right. That is me. I am done. I'm going to spend the weekend planning my new side hustles. Guys, we hope you have the best weekend ever and we'll see you for a money diary on Monday. Bye guys. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your

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