She's On The Money - The Sublet Slap In The Face

Episode Date: August 31, 2023

Happy Friday angels, today JRic is sick (get better soon!) but V and Bec bring all the Friday fun. As usual they share your money wins and losses, Bec brings the Broke Tips, and today's Money Dilemma is from a new mumma wondering about whether to take a leap of faith into a new work venture for better work/life balance. Plus, today's D.M got the gals pretty riled up. Have you ever lived in a share house and discovered that your roomies were letting their mates stay in your room...without asking you? We have lots of feels on this one! Links Zella Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, my name is Natasha Nabanunga-Bamblett. I'm a proud Yorta Yorta, Kernai, Wolperi and Awadjeri woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on Awadjeri country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through. As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow. Let's get into it. She's on the money. She's on the money.

Hello and welcome to She's On The Money, the podcast for millennials who want financial freedom. Today, my friends, is Friday, which means we usually get the team together, but Jess is sick. So, Bec, it's you and me today. I'm okay with that. Look, I think it's going to be fine. I don't know if we'll do the episode justice because Jess always keeps us on track and

we're the rogue ones. I'm going to miss her. What's this going to be called? The B&B? VB. The VB episode. Yeah. All right.

So this week, as always, we're going to be sharing our favorite money wins, which I get the privilege of doing. We're going to be talking broke tips. Bec said something about a banana before, unsure. It's a secret. Okay, sorry. We're also going to be answering a juicy money dilemma, which this week is all about what to prioritize when returning from maternity leave.

And we're going to be unpacking something you slid into our DMs about, which this week, Bec, we're going to be talking about a topic that gives me the ick. Yeah, housemates who let their friends use your room when you're not there. Oh, my God. It's going to get juicy. It's going to be a little bit gross. I love this. First things first, my love, how was your week?

My week was really good. I went to – actually, it's been a full week. I feel rejuvenated. I feel great. I feel like – It's been a good week? Yeah, it's been a really, really good week. Saw a lot of friends and did a lot of things and did a lot of chores.

And that's it, really. That's exciting. Yeah, what about you? That's very fun. Just working my life away. I am halfway through not recording but scripting up and like doing all the research, which always takes me the longest, of our investing masterclass, which is coming out soon. Yeah, I'm really excited about it. I asked a question in the Facebook group the other day

and I was just like, hey guys, I'm putting this together. What do you need to know? Because obviously I've already done so much research. I've written a book on investing, but I just want to jam pack so much more into it. I genuinely think that maybe 10% of what I talk about in the course is in the book. It's just gone real rogue because it's my course and I don't have a producer or an editor in the same way that I had a book. I'm like, well, that's staying in, that's staying in. I'm the boss here. So, yeah, anyway, I asked the group what you guys want.

I was like, hey, what can I include? And there were just so many good suggestions. So I went back to the drawing board and I, like, redid my skeleton and we're halfway there, which means I'm recording it soon, which means it will launch soon and I'm very excited about it. That's lovely. So maybe nobody else cares about an investing masterclass. I do because I think it's going to be lit.

So that's mainly what I have done literally a week. Wow, wow, wow. I get like hyper fixated on something. Yes. So like I've been doing it. Not that you should brag about how many hours you're putting in, but like I'm like up to like 10, 11 every night doing this. Like on the couch.

Sure. Just because I'm just so excited. I'm like, oh, yep. And then like I just keep typing and my husband's like, I'll just play video games this week, I guess. That is very exciting, Bea. You're a very hard worker and I'm very impressed by everything you do. Yeah, I don't even know if it's hard work.

I've just got a hyperfixation at the moment. That's a symptom, right? You know what? Yeah, it's definitely an ADHD thing. ADHD thing, gotcha. I'm definitely hyperfixated on it, so we're definitely not going to be putting the same hours in moving forward. But, like, you get what you get and you don't get upset.

Exactly, exactly. All right, so this is where I usually would hand over to our friend Jessica and be like, hey, what community money wins have you got this week, Bec? She's not here. No. So do we just skip? Absolutely not. I've got them.

Good, good, good. I'm ready. I've rounded up my favorites. Okay. First things first. Rosalie, she says, money loss. I bought a 10 pack of nuggets and they only had nine in there. Oh, it's usually the other way around. You usually get a few more. You don't usually get less. Yeah, that's really rude. That's really rude. I'd be salty about that too. We've got a money win from Katie who's new to our community. Hi, Katie. She says, I have three kids and I used our separate DoorDash accounts and I used the $1 deal promotion for an easy Sunday night takeaway dinner. Four burgers and chips cost me four bucks. No way. Isn't that a good money? That is so sick. Maybe we'll talk about this off mic, but I really want to know how. So DoorDash had a promotion

recently. Is it over? I don't know. We can Google it, but they had a promotion recently where one item from like random menus so it would depend on what area you were in but like some burger places were like okay well our chicken burger today is a dollar and so she clearly has hacked it so four burgers four bucks you can't even make that at home for that seriously that's so good and chips and chips chippies these days as an add-on spino they're like seven dollars fifty at a minimum now what the heck when did that start for some potato still gonna do it yeah They're still going to do it for sure. All right.

We've got a money win from Charlotte. She said, I don't usually share, but I really have to. We direct debit weekly to our gas and electricity account, a bit more expensive than required to cover any unexpected late bills. We recently moved house and turns out we were $800 in credit. Whoa. We've been refunded the money and we're hoping to repurpose that money on some fun projects on the new house we didn't even think

we could fund straight away. That is so sick. I love this. I have a couple more. Do you want me to keep going? Please, yes. This one's from Hugh. Hugh says, money win. A month ago, I changed my SIM card plan from Optus to Amazim, which saves me $20 a month. Since then, Optus contacted me with a different offer. They offered me the same price with more data. I thought that was pretty good. Then today, Amazim was like, hey, we'll give you $10 less. So obviously I said yes, and it's a 50% discount

on what I should be paying. Wow, that's good. Money when I literally love when people hustle. Yes. And to like negotiate a phone bill. Do you know these days you can basically just go online and talk to the online chat function. You don't even have to pick up the phone,

which is what I think gives most of our community a bit of anxiety because it gives me anxiety, like picking up the phone and having to be like, can I have a better deal? I know. Just get on the chat function. That's so much better. Everybody can be a keyboard warrior in that way. Oh, my gosh, that's so much better.

All right, I've got two more. This one's from Renee. Renee says, money win. I worked three out of four days from home last week, which meant no using petrol, and I saved $45 worth of parking, and I also didn't spend any money on coffees or juices that I would usually purchase while I'm at work. How good's that?

That's probably, I don't know, $100. I feel like it's a lot of money. It's a lot of money. Because, like, what's your coffee cost a day? Like $6 or something? $6, yeah. Disgusting. I know.

Disgusting. And it's probably, like, you know, three or four a day. Oh, are you serious? Yeah, I probably have three or four a day. Bec, say it. Three or four a day? Depends what week we are in the pay cycle. You go down to the cafe three or four times a day?

Yeah, sometimes just to have a chat, but then I'll also get a coffee, of course. Bec, do you know, I don't know how to tell you this. I'm scared. We have free coffee in the office. Instant coffee, babe. I'm not having instant coffee. I don't know how to make that. I will teach you how to make that.

Okay. But also, you can have like one a day. Like, I'm not trying to budget for you, but, like, three or four, sis. That's probably where all my money goes. Yeah, because what is that? That would be 24 times five. Oh, I just literally calculated it now. Hold on.

So three or four. Do you want to go based on three or based on four? Let's go three. We're going to go three. And you said that was six bucks each. You're spending $18 a day. And if you come to work every single day, that's $90 a week, not even including your weekend coffees.

True, I have more on the weekend. Your work coffees are costing that. you know let's be conservative yeah you get four weeks leave a year obviously we're not factoring in those coffees so instead of doing 50 what 52 weeks in a year you do 48 weeks in a year $4,320 beck you're spending on coffee at work wow honestly at work to be honest i probably now you're gonna say you didn't do it no no i was gonna say i may maybe even drink more on the weekend. You're like even more on the weekend. That was just like corporate coffees. Yeah, exactly. I'm very, very modest when I'm in the office, but when it's the weekend,

I'm having five or six. Oh my gosh. How do you function? Do you get a headache if you don't have coffee? No, it doesn't really hit me that much. I'm like a two coffee wonder. Like if I've had two coffees, I'm pinging off the walls and usually I am already, but like if you offer me another coffee, I have to be like, no, because I'll start shaking. Oh, you're one of those people that can't have tea after 2pm or something. Oh no, I can have tea. I can have so many teas, but I definitely can't have more coffees. Right. Okay. Gotcha. Gotcha. Coffee inside tiramisu. Different story though. Of course. Yeah. Of course. That's very different. All right. I have one more money win to share with you. This one is from Amy and you know what? 56 people liked

this money win. Oh, it's a bit long. So sit down. Sure. So she says money win used what was in the pantry and our grocery shop only cost us $75 last week. Half the normal budget, including all the fun things we bought because it was a small shop. She says, also, I want to share. Not my money win, but I also hear pressure to friend's husband into creating a savings account this weekend. He has tens of thousands of dollars just sitting in his transaction account. He moved pretty quick once I told him how much interest we were making with the same bank. I won't peer pressure my friends into drinking or taking drugs, but you best believe I will You'll be peer pressuring them into a better financial situation.

She sounds like a very good friend. What a queen. I love this. I love that. I feel like that's me on the weekends, like me offline. I'm always like, Dec, what are you doing with that money? Where are you going to put it? How do I help you?

Do you want to do a budget together? Do you want to hang out and sit down and do a budget? And you're like, do you really want to do that? And I'm like, yes, I do. That's true. If anyone listening, if you're wondering what V's like off mic, it is exactly the same. I'm like, do you want to talk about budgeting? She is exactly the same.

And sometimes I might be like, let's go watch a movie, but maybe you instead want to sit down with a budget. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Only financial movies, please. Wolf of Wall Street. A financial documentary. Also financial documentaries, love.

All right. All right. Right. Let's move on because I have heard that there's a banana involved in your broke tips and I just cannot work out how or why. So could you please elaborate, my friend? What have you got this week? Of course.

This would have looked so funny because our producer kindly printed this off for me today. She definitely didn't print all of the doodles all over that piece of paper. You've absolutely ruined it. For everyone listening, I don't know. Once I have a pen in hand, I can't help myself, but I must go. Yeah, we had to take it off you a couple of weeks ago because you had a permanent marker and you were drawing on the table. But also when you say doodles, it's not doodles.

It's the old school version of a doodle, which is just literally drawing silly things. Nobody's brain went there except for yours. Okay, maybe literally just me. I was thinking there's not a single doodle on this paper. There are. That whole paper is covered in doodles. Sorry. Okay, moving along.

Moving along. Okay, so V, my broke tips for this week. I, as always, have two from the community and one from myself. I will start with Kat. Kat sent me a broke tip. She said, if you download the Woolies app and go to the half price section and you only eat what is half price that week, you'll save a lot of money. Wait, so you're saying there's a whole section on the app?

There's a whole section. So I don't have to like flick through catalogs or like go through the aisles of the supermarket and work out what's half price. The app will just tell you. Exactly. She's a genius. Thanks for that, Kat. Yes, isn't it? And to extend on that, she says that she works at Woolies only on a Sunday morning,

stay-at-home mum life, so that she can keep her employee discounts, which is a great idea, I guess doesn't maybe work for the general population. But also Sunday rates. But Sunday rates. She also says Woolies is $15 unlimited delivery a month. It costs about that much to drive to and from there every week because she lives about 10 kilometres from a supermarket on the Sunshine Coast. Well, if it's $15 unlimited for a month, how many times do you go to the supermarket each month oh yeah true maybe like me maybe two or three times a month but i think i feel like a lot of people would go more often yeah but like even if you're going two or three times like if you do public transport what's a mikey these days like five bucks yeah so like that

already covers your three trips true but like car car insurance petrol so expensive 15 bucks and also what if you can just if it's unlimited you could just jump online and be like oh i actually do want a top up of bread and milk and just the basics to come on friday and like it's not going to cost you any more than what the bread and milk is going to be. Yeah, that's so true. It's a bit of a money win. It is a great idea. I like that.

10 out of 10. Yes, and someone packs it for you and delivers it to your door. Honestly stunning. You don't have to do that thing where you're carrying like seven bags of groceries in your That's what I do because you best believe I will not be doing two trips. I'm not going back there. Sometimes I just leave stuff in my car for like an extended period of time because I'm like, well, I guess it lives there now.

Me too. If it's not a perishable. Yeah, it lives there now. It's going to stay in my car until all of eternity. additional storage for my house yeah it's like a shed exactly back of the car is a shed all right what else have you got for me okay so this one is from caitlin who sent me a video of a basically it's a frugal man who peels bananas before weighing them to save money no he doesn't i think that's so clever what you think that's clever yeah i mean like our producer said it's

probably not legal which fair enough sure i don't think it's legal either but like also there's stingy then there's like real stingy it's like have you seen that frugal show i think it's on netflix where that woman cooks her lasagna in the dishwasher oh i've seen this in like salmon in foil in the dishwasher yeah and also there was that guy i don't know if it's involving money yeah i've watched it like if it's on netflix if it has anything to do with money i've watched it that guy they have a spa out the back but to justify the cost of the spa they don't bath or shower they just go in the spa and they also do all their washing in there oh no yeah I guess you make a tea in there absolutely not absolutely not I can't I can't and there was like some dude

who had heaps of money but lived in a house with absolutely no furniture because he's like why waste money on furniture when I can sit on the floor and I'm like well it's a good point it's a yeah that's a good point oh my gosh this is unrelated and it's definitely not a money win But the other day, I couldn't be bothered going downstairs to make a tea, so I got my bottle of water, cold bottle of water, put it in a cup, and I used a coffee cup, and had a tea bag that was just sitting in my room, and heated it by the radiant heater. So you'll do that the second you get to work, though. You're like, four coffees a day.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Paying full price. All of a sudden, all this energy comes over me, and I can go downstairs and get a coffee. Those are our broke tips for this week from our community. Actually, I don't know if this is legal, but if you take the stem off broccoli... I don't know if this is legal. I should not be saying it if I don't know but if you take the stem off broccoli

that could be cheaper I'm not sure if that's allowed No Bec, is that your broke tip? Is that not allowed? I don't know if it's allowed It's not my broke tip That's not yours That's just like an add-on

Just to go off of Caitlin's broke tip You know what? I just feel like the stem is the best bit so I get rid of it Oh yeah, that makes sense I like cut it up and put it in stir fries and stuff I really like it That's a good idea

Or, because I'm a bit weird I cut it up and eat it while I'm cooking Oh, okay I might try that. As I said, I'm a bit weird, but not weird. I want to know, what's your broke tip? Yes. Okay.

So my broke tip for this week, I guess it like, you know, it's a little bit of work, but if you have the time. It's a little bit of work. If you have the energy. Says the woman who made tea in her bedroom with an old tea bag. Exactly. Exactly. It's slightly less work than that.

Yeah. But I would say for myself personally, if I'm paying for a lot of things in a particular month or whatever your pay cycle is, fortnightly, whatever, if I know, if I predict that I'm going to run out of money quickly and I have a few bills coming up and I'm feeling super stressed out. What I used to do is I would just not pay the bills and then have people chasing me and feel extremely anxious. Terrible idea. It's a really bad idea. But honestly, what I have noticed in my adult life, and that's from 28 onward, if you call up places, let's say Linked, for example, I'm always paying for tolls. Your gas and electricity, if you have payments going on,

I used to use Hum, anything like that. If you call them up, explain your situation, you can even do it on that little chatbot thing, as you were saying before, you will be able to either have an extension on a due date or you'll be able to pay things off in smaller amounts. That's so good. Just try and put in the time, set aside some time if you're stressed about money, if you're stressed about bills that are coming up. Talk about it.

Talk about it. Because people, I'm sure companies would way rather you say, I'm going to pay on this date or maybe I'll pay a little bit. Then I'm not going to pay at all. Then just like literally ghost and then they have to chase you. You know what I mean? Most of them have hardship policies as well. Yes, exactly.

So if you reach out and be like, hey, I'm going through a bit of a rough patch, often they'll be like, oh, Bec, we totally get it. Exactly. Here's some relief. Exactly. And they don't make you feel silly about it. You should not feel embarrassed about it. It's all good.

Just consider that if you're going through a tough time and you have a lot of bills coming up. I love it. So smart and a good reminder especially right now. Yes. All right. let's go to a really quick break. On the flip side, we're going to be talking about what to prioritise when returning from maternity leave and the icky question of what do you do when your

housemate lets their friends sleep in your bed when you're not there? Don't go anywhere, guys. Welcome back, everyone. Let's have a listen to our Money Dilemma. Hi there. Have you got a money dilemma you just can't solve? The She's on the Money team is here to help. Every week, we tackle your dilemmas, both big and small, to answer your most burning money, career and life questions. To get involved, simply head to our website and leave us a short voice recording and you might just find yourself on the show. Now, let's take a listen to this week's money dilemma. Okay, a dilemma. I'm set to return back to work after my unpaid maternity leave next month. However, I was severely underpaid and only took that role because I was desperate at

the time, but also I simply just don't want to leave my son. I have been researching and wanting to start my own business, which will cost me $35,000 to start. This business is something I am passionate about, but will also allow me to stay at home with my son. I have a $25,000 car loan, which I pay $500 a month for, and I also only have $40,000 in savings. My partner and I are also looking to buy a place in the next two months with our money, but what do I do with mine? What do I do with mine? Yeah, I think mine. All right, Bec, what did you do when you returned from Mount Leith? What I did was I forgot that I had a baby. When I was listening to this, I was seeing you write things down and I was really trying to

think of something because I obviously this is very unrelatable to me I'm so sorry my advice is be kind to yourself and have a nice day and you blessed be thy fruits be the fruits I love that I did write a few notes I think this is such a sticky situation that a lot of new parents find themselves in right lots of people go on mat leave with every intention of returning but don't know what it's like having a baby. And then once they do have a baby, they're like, I don't want to leave. Like, this is great. Or I'm really enjoying my time off or I want more. What I'm hearing from the start is I think there's two parts to this, right? So you don't want to return to work, but you were very clear that you were severely underpaid in your current job. So it's quite

clear that you don't feel respected, I would say, in that role and don't want to return to that. whether you start a business or not, I think is a different conversation. But what you're saying, let's pretend you didn't say that you want to start a business. What you're saying is these people don't respect you. They're underpaying you. And if you return to work, you probably need a new job. So that's all well and good. I would be having a pragmatic think about, okay, well, if I don't return to that particular job, what are my options? Obviously, a business is one of them I think businesses are fantastic as somebody who owns one I adore the freedom but it's also not that free right and so maybe it's a bit risky especially it could be really risky it depends

what it is I always get back I get so nervous when people say I know my business startup costs are going to be $35,000 like I don't have nearly enough context like I don't know if you've gone and you know created this big beautiful spreadsheet and actually fully comprehend what it's going to cost? Right. Or has some multi-level marketing company come along and said, hey, Bec, you can get started for 35 grand. I don't know if this is a good idea or not. I can't tell you if starting a business is, I don't even know what it is. What I can tell you is it's a lot more work than you think it is. And even if it enables you to be home with your son, that does not necessarily mean that you're home present with your son. True. And it could weigh a lot heavier on you. It's something

that I think about a lot because I would love to start a family soon, but I also know that something's going to have to give for me to be a present parent rather than just one that's not there. And, you know, I look at my friends who, you know, just have salary and wage earning jobs and a few of them have returned part-time and I'm like, how cool would it be? And this is me not complaining. I adore the situation I'm in. How cool would it be to have a baby at home, go to work for my part-time hours come home and have not one thing to worry about yes you don't have to worry about payroll you don't have to worry about tax you're not doing bass to all hours of the night you're not you know doing your bookkeeping or being stressed about paying

creditors like there's so much benefit to being a salary and wage earning employee that I just look at it and go I get it but we need to see both sides of the coin I know being present for your son makes sense. But at the crux of it, what I'm hearing is you need to make an income. So that outcome, great. How are you going to do that in a way where you're still as present as you want to be? Because being home is one thing, but being a present parent is another. And I think that those things need to come into consideration when thinking about having a family and thinking about, you know, what your post-maternity leave life looks like. Because right now, I'm assuming, these are all assumptions, Bec. You said you're on unpaid maternity leave. You don't have any

responsibilities. Your responsibility is, you know, bringing up your child. They've got 100% of your undivided attention. Starting a business is hard. The first five years are hard. Like this stuff is not easy. And I'm not trying to talk you out of it. I just want a balanced argument of, hey, is that actually the right decision for right now? I know lots of people who have started of businesses while on mat leave or with new babies and they've been so successful and like it's the best decision they've ever made but I think that there is a lot of benefit in stepping back and going like all right well if you want to start a business that's fantastic but like what are your motivations to do so because as I said before this is personal opinion there's a

difference between being present and being present yes that makes sense yes that completely makes sense that would be my I guess take obviously you've got a car loan and you've got some savings. I'd be looking at options to fund the business. Let's say you go down that route and you need to, you know, do the startup costs. There are a lot of costs that you can't get away with, like you have to pay immediately. But what's this $35,000 made up of? Like, can you break it down? Like, have you looked at other quotes? Let's say you got a quote for marketing and branding and it was like $16,000. Like, have you gotten a few other quotes? Is that actually the best use of your money? You know, what parts of this could you do yourself? Because I think that getting a

business off the ground is one thing and then rebranding it so it thrives is another. So I just think, how can we strip that $35,000 back to the absolute bare minimum so that you can kind of go through that viability period and go, am I actually going to do this? Is this actually going to work for the least amount of money? And then go from there. The other thing, if you're saying we're planning on buying a house in a couple of weeks. I can almost guarantee that if you're working with a broker, that $40,000 that you have in savings right now has been taken into consideration as an asset. And if you disposed of it, it would change how much the bank wants to lend you. So just be really careful and talk to a broker before you make a decision.

I know a couple at Zella Money. Yes, you might know a couple. They're pretty good. Their boss is really nice, babe. What's the boss's name again? Oh, don't even worry about it. It's Not important. All right, let's move on to the spicy conversation. Is it spicy? I don't know if it's spicy or just gives me the ick. I think it might be because I've got a story and maybe you've probably got a story that's similar. Oh my gosh, I have the exact same story and this is, I guess, why it gives me the heebie-jeebies. Yes. Oh, don't do that. I love it. Are you ready? I'm ready. I'm so ready. All right, here it is. This is what slid into our DMs this

week. Hey ladies, could really use some advice. I've been traveling overseas for two months. whilst i was away i continued to pay my rent and bills towards the house i recently got home to find out that my two housemates essentially let their friends crash at our place when i was away whilst they didn't quote move in they were sleeping at our place in my bedroom at a minimum of three times a week use the hot water use the electricity and basically were me i'm so annoyed by this i low-key feel that this person should have been paying my rent if they wanted to use my room or even just some of the bills if they were sleeping in my bed multiple times a week. My housemates naively think that they did nothing wrong and that it's okay because they washed my

sheets and cleaned my room, so what's the big deal? They say that the person was hanging out on the weekend and it got late, so they just crashed there a few times. Do you think I have a right to ask for some rent or bill money back or do I just drop it? What do you think I should do? No, that's not okay. It's so ick. Yeah, it's very much, you know, I think even if you're the chillest, chillest, chillest person in the world, you don't mind if people go into your room. It's still a little bit weird when someone that you don't know is sleeping in your bed.

Maybe they're friends. I get it. But, like, ask first. Ask. No, because I reckon if they were friends, Bec, the friend would have met. Like, if I was going to your house to hang out with your housemates and you were traveling and they were like, oh, just stay, I'd message you and be like, hey, Bec, like, is it all right if I sleep in your room?

And you'd be like, yeah, that's fine because I know you, whatever. But it's such a different story when you don't know them. You said before that you've had this happen and so have I. When did it happen to you? Okay, so it didn't happen to me personally. And I also hope everyone listening. Did you do it to somebody else? I would never.

Bec, so I had. I would never. But there was one person who I used to live with who let their parent, their mum stay in a room that was vacant because our other housemate was like travelling. But it was still her room. Still her room. All her stuff was, like, in the room.

All her stuff was in there. They didn't know that anyone was sleeping in there. I think even something broke in there at some point. And then when that housemate got back, the person who let their parents stay said, oh, I just thought you were more chill than that. Like, I thought you'd be more, like, chill and, like, cool. You didn't even ask. And, like, didn't at all say, I'm so sorry. Like, I probably should have asked.

Or I'm so sorry. This blah, blah, blah. I overstepped a boundary. It was like, you are weird for not wanting this. And it was so. The gaslighting. yes oh my god i hope no one ever listens to this because they will know exactly who they are that happened to me too the very first time i moved out of home i lived in a share house

with my at the time partner and two other housemates they had the downstairs bedrooms we had an upstairs bedroom that we shared and at the time because it was like first time moving out i would go home on the weekends as would my partner because i still worked weekends like in retail and in hospitality back down the peninsula right so on like friday arvo i'd head back down and sometimes i wouldn't even come back depending on when uni was until like a monday night or something so i just like spend time with my parents and i had no idea this had been going on for like six months my housemate downstairs had decided well it's a free room over the weekend she'd just let her friends stay no when they went out on like a saturday night or a friday night

because I wasn't there no and like I hadn't noticed I I feel like some things were there but you know when you live with a partner like maybe he moved the pillows like you just don't think about it twice like it's not like it was my own room where if I put something down it shouldn't have moved like you know if I had a teacup beside the bed maybe I my partner put it in dishwasher or vice versa maybe the teacup beside the bed was from my partner didn't think turns out. No. His housemate, which I've told you about. Ah, this one. Yep. The panty stealer. Yep. She stole my underwear. And also, shout out to her. She's the one that emptied my freezer full of meat when I was eating it. Yeah. So, yeah, she was a delight to live with. Whoever

lives with her now, best of luck. May the odds ever be in your favor. But yeah, it was a very awkward experience because they didn't even wash the sheets back. Oh, no. They would just crash in my bed when they came home at 3am and obviously leave the next morning, like straighten up the sheets and call it a day. No. File. Yeah, that's so not okay. I feel like it was an invasion of my privacy.

Yeah, totally. It just feels weird. Yeah, it feels weird. All my stuff's in there. Like if you open my bedside drawer, you might find my stash of sour lollies. You know, like I just. You will find much worse in my room. Yeah, you'll find a vape.

Woke you back. Yeah, you will find many, many vapes. But it's one of those things that you're just like, I don't feel that comfortable with people coming in my space, especially when it's unplanned. Because like, I don't know about you, Bec, but if you were coming to stay at my house and you were going to like sleep in my bed because I wasn't there, I'd like change the sheets for you. I would like, you know, probably tidy it up a bit, like move some stuff around the bedside table. Do you know what I mean? Make me more comfortable that you're coming into my space. A bit weird.

Yeah, it feels weird. The real question is not whether it's weird or not. Basically, your feelings are valid. This is very valid. Yeah, don't let your housemates gaslight you. Exactly right. So the real question was, do you think I have a right to ask for some rent or bill money back or do I just drop it back?

You have every right. But would I try to do that? I wouldn't. I guess I would be like, I already feel like an outsider. Unless you're thinking of leaving anyway because of what's happened. If you are, then like, sure, maybe give it a go. But if you're not and you plan on staying there, it's already kind of like, wow, these people, these two people against me, they don't think they did the wrong thing. Now I'm going to also be asking for rent money and electricity and bill or whatever.

It's just going to become a fight because that person doesn't, maybe hasn't even budgeted for that either. You're asking for money that they haven't allocated. It's just a bit of a mess from my perspective. But does that mean you drop it? No. No. No, I would be going and setting some very clear boundaries that your room is not a shared space and that it is yours.

If you want to be real dramatic, you could put a lock on your room. Do it because it's so – it sucks. It's a violation of your privacy. It's a violation and now you're in this uncomfortable situation where you have to tell people very, very basic normal things. It's like being like, I don't know, I can't think of a single thing that would – like why would you even have to have this conversation? But you do now and it sucks.

It's not their space to share. that's not a shared space in the house. Like if you're away for the weekend, Bec, I can't just turn up to your house because it's convenient to sleep there without your permission and just go in. Like, why would that be in that circumstance? From my perspective, it's exactly the same. Like that is my personal space that I own and I pay for. You can't just walk in there willy nilly. Same with your house. I can't just walk into your house. What makes you think that you can walk into my room in the same way when you're a housemate, you're not my partner? Weird.

Weird, weird, weird, weird. But not to say that you don't deserve that money because you do and you probably are owed it. Yeah, 100%. But it's probably just not worth it. We did ask the community. What did they say? We said, would you be upset if you were this person?

88% said, yeah, I'd be very angry and very disappointed. 12% of you can't relate. You said, wouldn't bother me that much. Oh, a couple of chillers. Must be nice. The next question we asked was, do you think this person has the right to ask for some money back? 79% of people said yes. Okay. We said, if yes, who do you think should be paying them back?

65% of you said the housemates. Yeah. Not the friend. Because the friend, I don't know, what if the friend was told, yeah, it's fine. Exactly. Beck said it was fine. Yeah. And then they're fine with that. Yeah, exactly. I would say that's not on them. The person staying had no idea. Yeah. We then also asked you, what are your two cents? We need to know because Beck and I were a bit opinionated on this. So let's hopefully balance it out. Yeah. Someone said inconsiderate, selfish. Oh my goodness. I would never use those words. Someone said these people are not your friends. See if you can move out. Someone said more than the money, it tells us that they don't respect your space or your privacy. Fair. Absolutely rank. They let somebody

else sleep in your bed with like 15 exclamation points. Someone says, honestly, it's the fact they used your room. I'd feel like my personal space had been invaded. Someone said, it's not cool, but is it worth having a rocky housemate relationship when you ask for money? Yes. Which I think is a very valid point. I think that's where probably we are more so. Yeah. A lot of people, you know, there's heaps of comments basically. They're like, they absolutely should have asked. They should have, you know, gone above and beyond. There were lots of people saying, look, I would be absolutely ropeable, but I'd be ropeable at my housemates, not the person that stayed over. And yeah, someone said, well, it was three nights a week or was it a casual sleepover?

It's a very fine line. I still think it's a bit ick, but I don't know about you, but I do feel a lot better about a once-off situation. So three nights a week, fine. But like, oh, Beck, I'm so sorry when you're away. Jess, who's now sick, she stayed over because she drunk a bit too much to drive. And I just said, look, it's a bit late, but crash in Beck's bed. She won't mind. I've cleaned all your sheets. I've done everything. I hope that's okay. To me, that's a different situation because that's about personal safety than, I don't know, I feel like it's the intention behind it. I feel like three nights a week for the entire time you're away was on purpose. Yeah. It's very much like, hey, this room's free. Now it is literally anyone's, you know what I

mean? Yeah. Whereas like, oh, hey, you know, someone had a bit too much to drink. I told them to sleep in your bed because it was just not okay for them to go home. Like, yeah, that's It's actually really responsible. And I don't know, I feel like intention comes into it a lot. Totally, totally. I would agree with that. All right. Well, I think that's all we have time.

Yeah, that's a good place to leave it. But best of luck and keep us posted. Yeah, I'm going to post a picture of my bedside drawer on Instagram today, actually, to show you that I do, in fact, have a drawer full of sour lollies. That's very cute. I wasn't joking. That wasn't innuendo. So head over to my Instagram and I will show you that.

But otherwise, have the best weekend and we'll see you on Monday for a Money Diary. Bye, guys. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs. Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised

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