She's On The Money - When Cancer Changed Everything...

Episode Date: November 3, 2024

After years of navigating life in rural communities on a single income, our family of six was on the path to financial security. But when our youngest daughter faced not one, but two battles with cancer at just three years old, our plans took a drastic turn. Now, with resilience as our foundation, we’re thriving in the city, teaching our children the value of investing, goal-setting, and the power of pivoting. Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, my name is Natasha Nabanunga-Bamblett. I'm a proud Yorta Yorta, Kernai, Wolperi and Awadjeri woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on Awadjeri country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through. As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow. Let's get into it. She's on the money.

She's on the money. hello and welcome to she's on the money the podcast millennials who want financial freedom Welcome back to another one of our Money Diaries episodes where we get to talk to one of our incredible She's On The Money community members all about their money story. Let's jump straight into it because this week I got an email and it sounded exactly like this. Hi Victoria, love the pod and the She's On The Money team. Our story is very different and represents how we have overcome obstacles. We are a family of six who have primarily lived off one income for 12 years. We've lived and worked in rural and remote communities as teachers and principals.

Our plan was to save and get back to the city by the time our kids were in high school. We were getting ahead while our expenses were low until our baby girl got cancer at the age of three. This meant we had to shift to a major city centre at a second's notice and never return to our then home. Now, after not one but two cancer diagnoses, our daughter is cancer-free, smiling and thriving. Not only that, but we have just bought our second house. I'm working and we are teaching our kids the value of investing and goal setting. Our story is a complex one, but we believe that there is a valuable message in never giving up and being able to pivot the goalposts. We can't wait to share it with the She's On The Money community. Money Diaries, that is a roller coaster. How are

you? Oh, goodness. I'm a bit teary now and that doesn't happen very often. Oh, we got you good. Yeah. I'm not an emotional person. You are. You are deep down. I got you. I got you. But isn't it strange hearing back your money story and being like, holy moly, like we are actually so impressive. Like that's crazy. Honestly, I said to my husband, I don't even remember what I wrote in because there's so much to talk about. So yeah, that was really surreal. Oh, well, I'm glad it gives you a little bit of a point of reflection. I cannot wait to hear about your daughter, but before we get there, I want to know what grade would you give your money habits if I asked you to give them a grade from A through to F?

My first instinct was a C plus. You know me better than that. Yeah. I feel like we're going to have to re-juggle that a little bit. That's okay. Let's go with a C plus and we're going to learn a bit about you and we can talk about it at the end. Money Diarist, I need to know a bit more. Can you tell me in a bit more detail about your money story? Yeah. Okay. So, childhood, I don't have a whole lot to say. We didn't talk a lot about money in my household. And I knew the little bits. I knew my dad earned more. I knew we weren't well off. I was constantly comparing myself to other families and what they

were doing. But we got by. We did all the things. We had family holidays to local beaches and things. and then kind of in my teenage years my parents started breaking up on and off so that was really tough and I guess things were juggled around a little bit more things were never super dire either they could put food on the table we were educated so there's nothing drastic there other than a couple of you know family breakdowns but then when we got into our teenage years I started to realize that I needed to have a job to kind of do the things that I wanted to do so by 14 and 9 months I got my first job and that's where I met my husband. Oh really that young? Yes very young. That's so special. Yeah so I had been working at Coles he worked at Coles as well

and then I was also working as an assistant at my local dance studio which I danced at and got all my lessons for free so that was a burden. Oh that's a money win. Yeah so that happened actually earlier from about 12 and my parents didn't have to pay for my lessons anymore so that was a huge help because dancing is expensive. Ah yes as a dance child it was a lot. And there were three of us. Oh my gosh. Yes it was a lot. Mum and dad were probably like oh my gosh thank you money diarist for taking one for the team. Exactly so I did that and that actually got me a job as well from 18. So, I did start teaching my own studios from that point. But even before that happened, I actually got proposed to when I was 17. So, I was still in

high school. Oh my gosh, you were just a baby. Yes. So, we were babies. My husband was three years older. So, he was nine. Oh, he was 20 at the time actually. Oh, big dog. At that time, I feel like the age difference, it feels a lot more different. Now you're probably two peas in a pod, but at the time you were like, oh, this older boy is proposing to me. Yeah, it's pretty wild that that happens now. No, but seriously, I need to know, what possesses a 20-year-old man to propose to someone in high school?

What's he doing? In hindsight, I have no idea. Yeah, unhinged, unhinged. I mean, he wasn't wrong. Like, it worked out. It did. When you know, you know. But like, sir, where's your brain at?

Yeah. And that was exactly where my dad's brain was at when he got sat down with this young 20 year old for a coffee and was being asked if he could marry his daughter. I mean, he did it properly. That's kind of cute. My dad said no. Your dad's a smart man. I mean, I'm not against it, but I just think at 17, you're still a baby. Like there's so much life to be had. So what happened? You didn't get married at 17. We got engaged before graduation and we got married. I was 19. Oh, so you had a bit of time between getting engaged and then getting married.

A little bit, but still a baby. So, yeah. Then after I finished grade 12, my parents and my sisters moved to Sydney. So, at that point, I was not going with them because I was engaged and had my whole life planned out, supposedly. What did that look like? I have to ask. I really have to ask so when you're like I remember me at 19 I don't trust 19 year old Victoria like I do not like I look at it and I just go other people may be much better than me me though can't be trusted so you look back when you were planning things was it very I guess tunnel visioned were you like no this is the life I want this is how it's gonna be and is that how it has become or has it completely shifted I think it then it was very tunnel vision I don't remember even

considering going to Sydney. It was just always, I'm going to stay here. I'm going to go to uni. I'm going to keep working my jobs and I'm going to stay with my partner. And I don't remember there being a lot of pushback on that. So I guess my parents just went, yeah, okay, that's the way it's going to be. You can come visit. So yeah, that's the way we went. I moved in with my husband's parents and his family for a little while before we got our own rental. He pretty much managed the money from there. He's always had an Excel spreadsheet. And from that point on, our finances were joint, which I feel then wasn't uncommon as partnerships. We just combined our money and that was the norm. Whereas now we look back and go, oh, I don't know if that was kind of

the best thing to do for our own financial freedom separately. But in saying that, we're still making it work. I was going to say it's worked out. I mean, in hindsight, hindsight's a beautiful thing. right? Like I look back, I wouldn't have gotten into $40,000 worth of personal debt by 22. That's nice. But at the same time, I think we're just doing the best that we can with the tools and resources that we have. And it wasn't the worst decision, but at the same time, you're kind of like, well, actually, if I was to give someone else advice, I'd say maybe have your own emergency fund, maybe have your own debit cards. But like, I don't know, you're young and in love. I totally get it. Yeah. And that's what we did. We went for it and it has worked out. So that's good.

My husband finished uni and he worked as a teacher and we made things work. We got a rental, we moved out, we spent a lot of savings on furniture and all of those things and just lived paycheck to paycheck, working out life as a young couple. That was until we got married and we were pregnant with our first child. So I was 19, he was 22. We weren't quite ready for that adventure, but that's the adventure that we were put on. Did you say you got pregnant and then married or you got married and then pregnant straight away?

I was 11 weeks pregnant when I got married. So we had found out just before the wedding. Yeah. Okay. But that's kind of cute. I mean, in hindsight, terrifying because you were so young, but at the same time, like I'm such a baby person. So I would have just been like, woo. Then because of money difficulties and just, you know, preparing for a child and not really knowing what we were doing. My mom and my sisters had actually moved back to our town at that point and we decided to move back into them because they had a downstairs space that we could utilize. And that is so good, especially because like babies are so expensive, especially if you're not planning one and then suddenly you're like, okay, you're going to be a family of three,

like that would have taken so much pressure off. Even just having extra sets of hands around. And that was it. The night we brought our first child home, he was crying. He wasn't feeding well and kind of mom was just there to be like, he's fine. He's had some milk. It's okay. So yeah, it was good to have the reassurance in all of those things as a first time mom too, because you just don't know what you don't know. No. And whether you're 19 or 42 having your first child, you just don't know. Or 33 and me, I had literally no clue. And like, don't get me wrong. I adore babies. I've always been somebody that looks at babies and go, that's so nice. Like one day, but the second you bring them home and they're yours, I'm like, how did you let me out of the

hospital without a license? Exactly. Yeah. What do you mean? I'm just expected to care for this child and know what it needs. Like, oh, I know. Definitely need a license. You need a license for a lot of things in this world, but being a parent is not one of them. Exactly. So moved in with mum and then what happened? You've got a newborn. We have a newborn. I keep working as a dance teacher. So within two weeks I was back teaching. Sorry, what? You were teaching dance two weeks postpartum? Yeah. We didn't have a lot of choice in that regard. We just got back to it and I was very calm and collected and took the baby with me and my husband would pick him up from class and that worked. And I've actually done that with two of my four children. But you also

I loved it. So like two weeks postpartum, as long as you're not doing anything too strenuous, like I'm sure, I won't say it's okay. It's okay for you. And I mean, don't get me wrong, pot calling the kettle black. I went back to work so quickly, but it's yeah, individual. That's right. So yeah, we did that for a while. Life was pretty good. My husband was working as a teacher. Finances were stable. Then he gets offered a permanent position, but not in our local town. We had to move to a regional town in Queensland for that opportunity and we had to enter the rental market again. And just, you know, there were extra expenses with doing all of that. I was jobless because I had to leave my jobs. So, we knew we were going

to do it. It was just how we were going to make it work. And what drove that? So, like, obviously that sounds like a really good opportunity for him, but going from having him working and you working and all of that support what was the driver furthering his career or was it you know an income that was much higher than both of your incomes were combined like what made you go this is actually the best thing for our family it was the permanency with the department that was the driving factor in teaching and I feel like it's changed a little bit now but back then it was always that you should do your country service as a teacher. And he hadn't had permanency in our city yet. So, he was going from contract to contract, doing a year here, six months there.

So, it was the permanency. He knew he would do his three years country service and then get back to our main city. However, when we got there, his school that he was placed at was very challenging. No. And you've just taken all of these risks and then it's not good. Yeah. And he could handle the classroom. It was more that there was no support from the admin staff or the community as such either. So, he was in a hard place, not enjoying his job. I had two children by that point. So, I was at home, but also starting off in a new dance studio that opened up up there. So I didn't really feel like I noticed how his mental health was because I was so busy with the household stuff. Yeah, a hundred percent. And you're just trying

to keep it all together. But then also you've probably got, in general, a stressed husband coming home, working late, doing all of that. It's very hard to keep everything in check. Yeah. And coming home and wanting to spend time with the boys and his family and trying to fit as much in as possible. So, he decided that he was going to try to become a principal instead of a teacher. So, he did a couple of courses to make that happen and ended up getting posted very quickly out to very remote Queensland. So, we were kind of between Longreach and the Northern Territory border. So, it was two hours to get to Longreach and I did that weekly just to go to playgroup. Two hours for playgroup? For a playgroup, yes. However, expenses were low.

So, we paid $36 a fortnight for a small two-bedroom donger type accommodation. $36 a fortnight? All right. Sorry, sorry. It's sounding much better now. Yes. It was a town of 20 people when we moved in. So, it was very, very tiny. The school had five children total from prep to grade six. Yeah. Wow. That's not even one kid per class. No. So, it was very small, but it was eye-opening. It was something that not a lot of people in Australia get to do. So, we're very grateful to have had that opportunity when we did. So, it was amazing. And then from there, we moved to a small town between Rocky and Mackay. So, we spent three years there and our rent was still very cheap, which was lovely.

We had a nice house, but it was still an hour and a half drive to get my son to kindy that year. So, we did that five days a fortnight and people go, oh my goodness, you are crazy. Why would you do that drive? But at the time, my son had speech delays and we felt that it was important to get him socialized. A hundred percent. and also like your values are overlaying with everything else like I feel like for some people

they say oh an hour and a half that's unhinged but then on the flip side there are people that I know that drive an hour and a half every morning to go to their nine-to-five job and they do that every morning and every night so they're in the car at least three hours like because not because they have to because they want to live in a certain location and then drive to work like we all just make a decision that's right for us like it doesn't mean it's wrong it just means that some people might not want to do that. And that's cool if it's not for you, but I'm glad it worked out for you guys. So, yeah, there were financial benefits of doing that as well. So, there was a race payment for living in a remote area. And that meant that twice a year, we got like a couple of thousand

dollars, kind of like a bonus, I guess. And it was per person. So, my husband and I would get, let's say a thousand dollars. And then for each child, you might get 500. And yeah, it was just a really nice community as well so we really enjoyed our time there but coming up to three years my husband felt like he was ready for a change so we did move to a larger school where he was a teaching principal as well and then eventually got to open up a new high school which was very cool he got on really well with the staff at that school and they opened up they had two grades to start with and really felt like we were going to stay there for a long time until our kids started high school which was really lovely our kids we had three children by that

point fourth on the way oh my gosh four babies four babies yes yeah so it's a pretty crazy life no I love it I love it we love it I've only got one but I'm already like so can we have more yeah yeah more babies we love babies I think it's so crazy because so many people are like are you one and done I'm like oh no I'm one and more like this has just told me that I need more of these so bad. So special. So you had three babies and you're pregnant. Yes. My last one came in a bit of a hurry. We did go into the hospital. I went by myself with my two children who weren't yet at school. Then they said, no, you're not going anywhere. You have to stay. You're like, but I have two toddlers following me around. Yeah. So I think after school, my husband came

to pick up the two toddlers and then we had a baby like the next day, which was wild. We had to get people who I didn't know very well to look after the other children at our house. Oh yeah. That would have been a bit stressful. You would have been, I just want to go home. I just want all my babies under one roof and I want to look after them. Thank you. Yeah. And we were just trying to figure out our finances and how that was all going to look. I actually got back to work that year and I came back as a relief teacher. Sorry, four babies and she's back at work. Yeah. So I put my littlest one in daycare and my third child was in like a pre-kindy class

at that point. So she was going to do two years at kindy. So life was getting back on track. It was becoming more normal. I was getting some adult time at my job. And had you gotten to the point where you're like four kids, I think we're done. So we're through that like baby phase or was this like a, you're just not sure. Like, I feel like there's a mental shift with people when they're like no we're now done having babies so you kind of like can go a little bit mentally you get a bit more space that's right yeah and we were definitely at that point my husband was definitely done and yeah we knew we wanted four from the very beginning so we're like nope four that's it and we didn't have an easy journey either we did have a few miscarriages in amongst the four so it was

in no way you know an easy journey and people you know often said why like you've got two beautiful babies or three beautiful babies. Literally get in the bin. Like I hate when people just don't justify it. It's a really shitty thing that happens. I don't want to hear, be grateful for what you've already got. Like I totally get that. And I totally understand the flip side that there are people out there who have it worse. I get that. But that does not take away from the fact that the thing I'm experiencing is challenging for me. Like, oh. Yeah. And it's more talked about now which is amazing so yeah I'm really grateful that people are able to talk about I'm grateful that I'm able to open up to other people and say oh that actually happened to me but I just

didn't talk about it at that stage because it wasn't as spoken about even five years ago a hundred percent and it's like this shitty club that no one wants to be a part of but then when it happens to you you say oh my gosh like and maybe you didn't talk about it personally but you've probably noticed that if somebody else mentions it to you you go oh yeah that happened to me they go wait what like you just don't realize how many people in your community are going through the same things it's why we have to talk about it more often because when I was going through that I felt so alone had no idea that it was so common but when I started talking about it people like yeah me too I was like sorry what people in my literal family that I had no idea

had been through exactly the same thing because it's so common too and yeah it's just not spoken about enough but we're starting to shift which is very good so yeah things were getting back on track and we felt like we were able to well we had been saving I'm not going to say we weren't saving we were always the plan was always to save while we were living more cheaply in rural Queensland and then by 2024 we were planning to move back to our major city to put our kids through high school and give them the most opportunities with sport and recreation activities and friendship groups and being back home to where our family were as well was really important yeah absolutely and kids once they get to teenage years like being rural would be so challenging yeah yeah we really wanted

to be back where we knew maybe even send our kids to the same school that we went to because we did have good experiences yeah so cute yeah so that was always the plan so we could see our our savings increase and we could see what was going on until my daughter was diagnosed with cancer and it was a soft tissue cancer that grew behind her right eye. It was very aggressive and fast growing so they had to get on top of it really quickly and she started chemo by the Saturday that week. Oh my god. Yeah and had a couple of other general anesthetics between the Wednesday and the Saturday. So, that was really stressful. We lived in a hospital for that week. I actually thought we were going to stay in the hospital for the full kind of 9 to 12 months that they told us

we would be stuck there because I didn't know. I didn't know what a cancer diagnosis looked like. So, that's when our world really turned upside down. My husband immediately went into logistics because he was still in regional Queensland working, sending our older boys to school. So it was a really, really terrifying time health-wise, but also logistically. Yeah, of course. We ended up having to stay in Brisbane for the duration of that cancer treatment. She was given six months of chemo and radiation. And in that time, our savings took a big hit.

Of course they did. Even just like all the small things like parking and buying food at the hospital that's overpriced because hospital food is trash and few and far between. Like all of those things just add up so quickly that you would feel buried almost. Yeah. So it was very much felt like that. And we were very lucky in the way that people would help out. They would help out by having my youngest child, which was a huge help. and they would send Uber Eats vouchers or, you know, things like that. And we actually did stay in a charity house. That's actually such a good present on the side. Like if anyone's going

through that, they're in hospital, like you send them Uber Eats vouchers, like don't bring them food, give them an Uber Eats voucher so they can order what they want, when they want and how they want to do it. Iconic recommendation. That's what we tell people now. Yeah, a hundred percent. So tell me, you stayed in a charity house? We did, yes. So we lived in a charity called Childhood Cancer Support and they offered housing free of charge to any family who have a child going through a cancer diagnosis. So we were very, very lucky that we were in a small apartment but got moved to a house very, very quickly in our stay because we are a larger family. Yeah, 100%. Yeah. And even just finding accommodation that's appropriate would have been challenging.

And there was the option of us splitting up so that my husband would stay in our home up north and my daughter and I would stay down in Brisbane. But it just wasn't an option. We were told by medical staff that you want to all be together because it is going to be a challenging road. So we did decide to do that. We stayed in the charity house. We'd live very cheaply on the side of the hospital life, even though things were very expensive. But it did mean that my husband could continue working and hopefully be able to save a little bit on the side as well just to keep our goals kind of ticking along even just a little bit so that all happened that was six months my daughter did really well through treatment I say that and I'm like oh did she do

well but she did she was as healthy as what a cancer patient could be but did you do well how were you because like she's going through this and like not to minimize it at all but kids don't know what's going on they just look to their parent and go if you're okay with this I guess I'm okay with this like what's going on and so you're trying to be like the rock of this family for this child and three other children and your husband how did you deal with that I think she was the rock really I think because she was so smiley she was so happy she just did not really stop it really made it hard for us to kind of be completely broken she's just like what's up guys it's all good but it's all good we're just going to do this and then do you think that we could play

yeah and for a three-year-old she didn't know any different like even now she still thinks that her hospital life is normal that everybody does that everybody does that at three they just spend six months of their life in the hospital getting all my honey chemo pumped into you and vomiting and you know doing all the awful things that's a whole other podcast there's lots of things but overall she did okay and she finished up six months later and we had a beautiful Christmas together we were able to leave the bubble so the bubble you have to stay within half an hour of the hospital that you're at while you're on cancer treatment because if things go wrong they need to be able to get antibiotics into you very very quickly so we actually did do a trip up to where

we moved from. That would have been so nice. Yeah. So, it was really, really nice to see everybody and for her to see her kindy friends and things like that. And she started kindy in the new year and made some new friends and everything was going really well until again about May, things started changing again. And everyone told me, you're seeing things. I'm not seeing what you're seeing. I think it's okay. Was this medical professionals? I did go she got hands foot and mouth and I presented to the ED with her and I said look at her eye her right eye doesn't always match up to her left it kind of looks off to the another direction a little bit it wasn't major I understand that and he said no it's all good

I've checked her eyes it's all good then the next week she had a doctor's appointment with her ophthalmologist her normal ophthalmologist who we love and she said oh no we can fix that we'll fix that with surgery later. All good. The scans came back. Okay. Okay. But I still feel like something's off. Yeah. So, I rang our oncologist and she was already due for her three monthly scans. So, he said, let's bring the scans forward. It ended up being about a week early and he gave me every reason under the sun why it would not be the cancer. It was fluid sitting behind the eye. it had been caused by the radiation that she'd received because she had received 28 rounds of radiation which is quite a lot for a little body she could have a virus she could

have any number of things not cancer though but no it was again a Monday night and it was back it was the same size that it was no a year before and yeah we were thrown back into it and I could tell people were panicked the oncologist is usually very calm very collected yeah it's their job right like as much as it's stressful like they know how to deal with this but and he was a bit more scattered he was throwing words out there he was like chemo radiation surgery he was throwing out all the options and I was like I don't know what you're talking about so she ended up having more scans done that week we saw the surgical team later on and they told us that we would have to remove her right eye to remove the cancer so we were thrown very quickly back into the whirlwind

of me not being able to work not having somewhere to live because now the charity wasn't an option because we decided to stay in Brisbane so we had to try to come up with the rent while only being on one income again. And we could just see that, you know, again, our goals were going backwards and backwards and backwards, which was really hard. We kept doing what we were doing. I tried to work in between cycles of chemotherapy, which did work. I was very, very grateful. I have a beautiful family who will have my youngest son regularly so that I could go to work. They were so helpful, not just because they're beautiful people, just financially, it has put us ahead. A hundred percent. Cause childcare, like you wouldn't have been able to go to work. Like,

especially if you were working casually in between chemo, like the amount of money it would have cost you to put him into daycare to then go to, it would have just set you back even further. Yeah, that's right. So yeah, it was really, really hard. And my daughter, I'm going to get back into finances. I know. No, it's okay. Like it's such an important story. Yeah. So she had nine months of chemo again. So the first time she had six months, this time it was nine months on a high risk protocol. So things were a lot worse this time. Her side effects were awful, awful. She wouldn't wake up for days. She wouldn't eat. She wouldn't drink. And every single cycle was delayed because she was too unwell to start the next cycle. So things just

got super duper delayed in all of her treatment and she was really unwell, which was really challenging. It wasn't until she had a break from chemo that she was able to kind of come back to life, reset. They pumped some blood into her to kind of keep her going all the time, but then they had to do surgery. So we had to remove her right eye to get to the tumor. So she's now a little girl who wears an eye patch because underneath that eye patch is a hole basically is that going to heal over time and we can you know get a prosthesis or something organized yeah so she does have a prosthetic at the moment and she's getting a second one made it's not as simple no you can't just whack one in and call it a day no so if you lose your eyeball for example they

making you an eyeball and you can slot that into the eye socket with the eyelid keeping it in and whatnot but for my daughter she doesn't have an eyelid so it's her whole eye socket that has been removed so it's kind of like a ping pong ball size hole where her eye should be and they did take a flap of skin from her leg as a skin graft so it's all skin in there it's kept clean we have to clean it but yeah a prosthetic is just a bit harder because the eye will never move yeah wow yeah and she's just not convinced she's now seven people know her to wear an eye patch and she's used to that routine so I'm not sure that having a prosthetic is going to be something that she regularly utilizes at this point of course but we want to give her the options I was going to say

and like times will change and things that she's going through will change and I mean it would be challenging being a seven-year-old going through that, but even, you know, knowing the challenges that face her as she grows up, like just knowing their options is so nice. Yeah, that's right. So that's where we're at now. She has been 18 months out of cancer treatment. She has just actually done her last step in the process. She had her port removed. So all the chemo was pumped through a port in her chest and that has now been removed as of last week so that is very exciting we feel like we can move on at this time because now everyone is back at school I'm working pretty consistently as a relief teacher and we're back on track we've just bought a new house

we had to save like crazy and make some sacrifices in that regard but we also have some pretty solidified goals that we're working towards and just trying to encourage our kids to just be financially aware of what's going on in the world, but also what's going on under our roof and what we're saving for and why we can't buy this, but maybe we can do that. So yeah, we feel like the next couple of years, hopefully going forward, will be our time to kind of get on top of what we want to do. 100%. And it sounds like you guys are really clear about that too. All right. I hate to cut you off there, but let's go to a really quick break. And on the flip side, I want to talk about your best and worst money habits. And I want to talk all about investing. So guys don't go

anywhere. All right, we're back. So moving to finance for a bit more, I want to know about your goals, but first what's your current income as a family? What is your husband earning? What are you earning what's coming in the door yeah so I am primarily a relief teacher who takes on short contracts as well at two schools last year I earned sixty thousand dollars excluding super and my husband for the last financial year earned a hundred and fifty thousand dollars as a deputy principal that's pretty cool that you like not your husband's income your income though going through all of that and still bringing in 60 grand like that's queen behavior. Yeah. So, that was actually the most, this is the first financial year that I've paid

some hex off. Oh my gosh. How good is that? To have gone through all of that and you're like, okay, well, finances could have been stupidly stressful, but at least we're coasting. Like, oh. We're doing okay, I think. So, tell me more about these goals. You said before, like we've got some pretty clear and big money goals. What are they? What are we working towards? At the moment, it is to build up an emergency fund because that got eaten up but with the house process and it wasn't really a priority to be honest to have an emergency fund at this point but it is a priority now because my husband is taking a step back next year and going back to the classroom as a teacher oh is he excited about that he is very excited he

needs a break he worked all through covid all through my daughter's diagnosis and treatment and all of that and he needs to get back to what he really really loves and that is education and being with the children and teaching yeah it would be hard because it sounds like I'm just making some some guesses here educated guesses but given he was so happy to move regionally to teach like it sounds like he is very much a teacher not a principal like he's I'm sure he's a fantastic principal but principal's a lot more hands-off whereas it sounds like he's like a hands-on kind of guy wants to get in there and help the kids as opposed to sit in an office and tell all the other teachers what to do yeah and it got to the point where he was kind of the events planner

but also the complaints manager as well that was kind of what his role involved he's like this is not why I became a teacher this is not why I got into the position that I'm in yeah this isn't working the way I thought it would yeah I want to go back to what I'm passionate about so that's exciting. So we'd like to have $10,000 saved by the end of the year so that next year, if things become a bit tight with him taking a decrease in pay, we have some money there just in case. Yeah. So that you don't have to stress. Yeah. Just be nice. In 2029, we would like to go overseas for the first time with all four of our children. Yes.

So the goal is to have $80,000 there, but with a family of six, we think it will probably be closer to $100,000. Where are you going though? What's this holiday look like? Have you got any idea or are you just like, let's just get the money and work it out later? For this one, we would like to go to the UK and do a bit of UK, a bit of Europe. And then the plan was to do it three years later when my second child graduates high school. However, financially, we're not sure what that looks like at this point. We were saving for both, but at the moment, yeah, the 2032 one has no money in it. Totally. And they'll all be old enough to appreciate it too. So, that's so nice. Yeah. So, that is another one. And then building up the investment portfolio again.

I was about to say, do you have any investments? Oh, yes. Investments. So, we have our super. Yes. And mine is a lot less because I didn't work as much while I was having the children. My husband does have a good balance though. So, he makes contributions to my super now. Oh, thank you, sir. Yes. So that's every fortnight. And my super is sitting at $27,000 and his super is $335,000. Oh, sorry. What? That is not where I thought that would come from. Like that is a nice amount of super. He is very chuffed with that amount of super. I would be too. Thank you for my financial freedom in the future. Yes. I just listened to your episode about super this morning.

Yeah, good. And yeah, just hearing that amount of, you know, just under $600,000 by the time you retire. I was like, okay, we are sitting okay. 100%. And like on average money doubles every 10 years. So that's going to be like $660,000 in another 10 years as it compounds, but he's also going to be contributing to it. So like, we need to get yours up and that is okay. I feel like you're already across that. I don't need to tell you. But at the end of the day, like that would help me breathe a sigh of relief to be like, we're going through all of this. Like, you know, even when talking about emergency funds, knowing that that's emergency funds for now and that the future me is looked

after. Yeah, it is pretty cool. Super is amazing. And to be honest, my super was at about $10,000, I'm going to say 18 months ago. Would that make sense if you weren't working and things were, you know, plodding along? Like, I really like that. That makes me feel very secure for you. Yes. And then other investments, we do have shares through Superhero. So, that for us is about $13,000. Oh, how good's that? Yeah. We did have to make a sacrifice when we bought the house and we sold about $33,000 worth of shares. We did hold them for seven years and they had increased quite a lot. so it was a sacrifice and one that I wasn't 100% on but in saying that we got into the property

market so we're very happy I know you're saying it's a sacrifice but a lot of us do invest to then be able to take it out as a home deposit and be a little bit ahead so it's not the worst thing in the entire world I think in our heads you know in an ideal world we would have had enough of the deposit to make it work yeah of course so it was just getting across like the mindset of that's okay. We need to change the goalposts and make that sacrifice to make things work for our family. 100%. So, yeah, that was okay. And we do invest for our children. Do you actually? How good's that? How do you do that? Yes. Well, we do not do it in the most accurate way. However, at the age of seven,

we put away $10,000 for each of our children. Oh my gosh. So my daughter has just turned seven. So we have three children now who we have separate investments for. So for my husband, he invests for my oldest and he puts them in one share, for example. He's 12 and he has $24,000 invested. Oh my gosh. Okay. Yeah. In a managed portfolio and also a bit in a couple of other individual shares as well. and he gets six monthly dividends. Our second child has $15,000 and he's nine. Oh my God. These kids have more investments than most people in our community. What is going on? Well, I don't know how this is going to work as they become of age to utilize them.

You know what? That is a problem that we can look into in the future because if the cash is there, I promise the answers will come. We will figure it out. Yeah. It's not the best way, but at the time, we didn't have the resources to know what was the best way. So this was the least confusing way for us to do things. Yeah, no, I love it. And then our third, she has just turned seven. So hers is ticking away nicely and she gets monthly dividends. How good. And then my husband also adds a thousand dollars each birthday as well. Yeah, that will tick away nicely for them to have a little cash fund when they want to do something amazing with it. And they're so privileged. These children. So lucky. Absolutely. Like I am actually in shock because this is not how I thought that

you were going to answer the investing question, because obviously you guys have had a roller coaster of a journey, having gone through so much, had so many financial burdens to deal with, to then hear that you're also still prioritizing investing for your kids. I'm just like, how are you managing this? Like, especially because you were on one income, like you guys must be budgeting wizards to go, all right, well, this is how this is going to work. And at the start you said, yeah, my husband like manages it through a spreadsheet. What is it? A spaceship spreadsheet? Like you get on there and it's a full dashboard where he's taking over the world. Like I am impressed because I genuinely like people in similar situations that I have spoken

to before are like no savings, no investments, maybe another 10 years before we're able to purchase property. And that is just impressive. I give a lot of credit to my husband in that because I would be lost without him. I am up to date on all of your podcasts. I listen to other things. I'm very educated myself. I just don't have the time and the energy to physically put it into action. That is so fine because all I care about is that you know. Doesn't mean you have to do it. I just need you to know so that if anything ever happens, you're like, no, I know where our money is. I know what's going on. I know where our mortgage is. I know how to pay off things. I just don't want people to be without the help that they deserve.

That's right. Yeah. Amazing. We also have an investment property. Oh my God, what? So we have an investment property where my husband got his first permanent job, which we bought while we lived there for nine months. And that is rented for $450 a week. And it is negatively geared at the moment and he uses the tax benefits to offset his taxable income. So at the moment that works for us. If finances get super tough with this new property and just our financial process throughout next year, we might have to rethink the investment property, but that's a later problem. We don't have to do that right now. But that's okay. Cause like it's ticking along and isn't it cool to have

options? Yeah, that's right. I'm so proud of you. Like this is actually insane. I know I haven't finished all of my questions, but I can already foresee a little argument between you and I at the end about that C plus that you gave yourself at the start. We'll get there though. There are some negatives, I promise. Okay. So, tell me about debt. So, you've got an investment property, you've just purchased a family home. What type of debt are we carrying? So, our investment property has $245,000 owing. And we bought this house in 2015 for $322,000 under only my husband's name. so I wasn't on any of that for us and it's now worth $515,000. Okay. So that's okay. What do you mean that's okay? That's great. Yeah well it's amazing because the house actually went down

almost a hundred grand just after we bought it. Yeah regional is scary when you buy. It can be a great investment, it can be a good investment but like it's really dependent on the market that's quite local. Yeah and I think you know COVID did not help a lot of things but maybe it did help a bit in the regional property market. So, we're very grateful for that. And we used equity from this house to purchase the new house. So, we have $107,000 owing on a tranche loan. And we bought this house just recently for $930,000 and it has $782,000 owing. Hey, that's pretty good. So, I think the combined is over 1.1 mil, but that's okay we're paying it off 30-year loans I feel like in this day and age like in Melbourne

the average property price is a million dollars so like you're not doing too badly but it does get kind of scary doesn't it like when you look at it and you're like that's a seven figure number that I owe somebody like that can be really scary but in the grand scheme of things it sounds like you have a really good budget system it sounds like you understand cash flow and what that looks like and how it all works. Like, I think you're going to be just fine, my friend. Hopefully. Hopefully. And then our only other debt is my HECS debt. So, as I said, I hadn't paid a lot off of it because I haven't earned much over the last long time. But that's my favorite thing about HECS, right? You only paid off if you're earning enough.

Yes, that's right. So, that is a beautiful thing. So, my HECS debt is $30,000. So, that's okay. that'll tick along. That will, you know, come down slowly and we're okay with that. I guess we did have the option to pay that off before the indexation hit last year and before we bought our property. I can also see from your financials, because as you probably know, I own a mortgage broking company looking at it. I don't think paying off that $30,000 worth of HECS debt would have impacted your borrowing capacity enough to make it worth it. That's right. And that's what we went through. So, yeah, that is all of our debts. We haven't had a credit card in a very long time. We did to go on an overseas holiday in 2016 and it was not a good idea. No, because you

come back from this beautiful holiday and now you've got to pay for it and you've got nothing to show. Yeah, yeah. We thought it was a great idea at the time and then, no, it did just backfire. And, you know, we were smart about it and we got out of it pretty quickly, but it was a bit scary too. Like I can see how people get into a bad spot with credit card debt. Yeah. A hundred percent. No one gets a credit card with the intention of going into debt they can't handle. Right. And that would have been your experience. You got the credit card, sounded sunshine and roses, and then all of a sudden it wasn't working as well. And you're like, oh, what have we done? Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

So it sounds like you've got probably some very good money habits. What do you reckon is your best money habit? I think my best money habit is having a husband who is very hands-on with the money side of things. But for both of us, for our family, we are very good at paying ourselves first. So, we always pay into our 2029 holiday account and we always put $225 into our investment portfolio every fortnight and $150 into my super. I love that because otherwise it just disappears. yeah and I know myself I would prioritize other things because I'm a bit more impulsive and I have maybe different material priorities especially now that we've bought a house and we you know

want to make it our own oh my gosh yeah furnishing it all of that stuff totally get it so yeah we always do that which is really really important to us and our financial future with the kids and we also have a camper trailer so we go on lots of camping holidays throughout the year and whenever we are on one camping holiday, we always book for the next one. Oh, I love that. So you've always got something to look forward to. Yeah, yeah. And we kind of know that this family time is really, really precious. Honestly, we don't know what the health future looks for our daughter. So we're trying to cram as much family time in as possible while also paying the bills and making a life for

ourselves. I feel like you're killing it. I feel like you are doing such a good job, but I need to know, worst money habit? Have you even got one at this stage? Our worst money habit is definitely the, it's not the budgeting side of things. We are good at budgeting. It's the leaking money. Even though the budget is there, we are always overspending. It's mostly like incidental things like we go to swim club on a Friday night, we have to purchase dinner. And while that's not super expensive, it might be $30. But it wasn't in the plan. Like you had a meal plan organized. yeah or school supplies at the end of the year for the next year we have to buy

four of them as of next year and that adds up so much so it's that stuff that's not in the budget and it's not in the budget because our income doesn't cover it so we try to make up for it so we'll put when those expenses come up we'll pull money from our bills to pay for those things but then we'll have to pay ourselves back somewhere along the lines and we're not necessarily sure where that's coming from and when it's coming. So that is definitely our worst leaking money for the incidentals and just not knowing where that extra money is coming from. So I definitely think we can improve on our cashflow and knowing exactly what we spend, when we spend it and how much those things are going to be. And that's hard, right? Because you're like,

well, I don't know what school books are going to be, but I don't know what this looks like. and that's, I guess, why budgeting can be so fickle and you have to revisit it a number of times, right? Yeah. And just things creep up, like even gifts and Christmas. We know Christmas is expensive, but somehow we just don't budget for it. So yeah, that is definitely a money flaw for us, even though things look pretty peachy. But it is still stressful. And I think that that's a really good lesson for everybody. Like if you just don't budget for something, it can be stressful irrespective of how good you are at investing or saving or buying property. Like money has to come from somewhere and it is stressful shuffling it around.

Oh, money diarist, I have a bone to pick with you. I do apologize. But you did say, oh, I think we're a C plus. You have been through the ringer like you have had. I mean, I'm so grateful that you have a beautiful family and that your daughter is happy and healthy and cancer free and smiling and thriving. But you have been through a shit storm that would have financially ruined so many people. But then when we started to learn more about you, you're like, yeah, we actually have an investment property. Yeah, we've purchased our own property. My husband's super, always prioritized it. We're actually paying off some more to my super. Yeah, we actually do invest. Yeah, consistently. We actually invest for our kids too. We're across

this. V, I have my stuff together and you think you're a C plus, please, straight in the bin, like money direst. Yeah, I think our budget and cash flow is where we really sink down and we want to be able to contribute more to investing in things. The other problem with us is that we don't have the potential to increase our income as such doing the things that we're doing because they are government jobs. So, we're trying to figure out how we can get there. So, yes, I agree that we will probably be a bit more than a C plus, but I wouldn't be willing to go any further than a B. And I think that's fine because we all feel like we've got stuff to improve on and you can absolutely improve what you think is fair. But I think we're also harsh on ourselves,

especially as women. We're like, no, we're not doing enough. We're not doing well. You are killing it. Like you're a good mom. You're a good moneymaker. Like the fact that you earned 60 grand last year, be for real. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. It really does mean a lot to hear other people say that because we're not huge talkers about money outside of our family network. We talk about it a lot here, but yeah, it is really, really humbling, I guess, to hear somebody else say that. So thank you. Oh, I love it. I'm so proud that you're part of our community. I'm just, I'm so glad irrespective of all the financial things to hear that your daughter is happy at the moment and that things are going well. And I know it's

shitty but even that newfound appreciation of family time and you guys embracing that like I think that's just so special like it's crap but at the end of the day like I'm just glad that they have a mum and dad who are absolutely obsessed with them and that is literally all any kid can ask for so Marnie Dyrist it has been an absolute pleasure I am very sad that we don't have any more time but I have loved this story and I know our community is going to be obsessed with this story as much as I am so thank you so much for being so open and generous with it because I'm sure it wasn't easy to share no thank you yeah it was really tough in the beginning hearing you read back the um money story that I sent in oh but now talking through it yeah I think we'll be okay and

your words mean a lot you're doing so well I'm just I'm so in awe like I'm just so impressed and I hope that at some point we get to cross paths in person that'll be really special that would be amazing. The advice shared on She's on the Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs. Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN 321 649 27708 AFSL 451 289.