She's On The Money - When the Unimaginable Happens

Episode Date: August 3, 2025

What happens when life changes in an instant, and the world expects you to carry on? This week’s Money Diarist had everything in motion: a new home with a pool, $40k in savings, a baby on the way, and a backyard wedding just around the corner. But days before she was meant to walk down the aisle, she faced the unimaginable: her daughter was stillborn. In this deeply personal and courageous conversation, she opens up about what came next; grappling with grief, navigating systems that weren’t built for moments like this, and trying to stay afloat when everything felt like it was sinking. From Centrelink confusion and being forced back to work too soon, to finding moments of light in Taylor Swift concerts, this is a story of love, loss, and learning how to begin again. Content warning: This episode contains discussion of stillbirth, grief, and pregnancy loss. If this topic is sensitive for you, please take care when listening or skip this one altogether. For support, you can contact Red Nose Grief and Loss on 1300 308 307, which offers 24/7 bereavement care and specialised support for anyone affected by miscarriage or stillbirth. Ready to binge more relatable, inspiring, and downright juicy money stories? Check out our ultimate Money Diaries playlist. Listen now Join our Facebook Group AKA the ultimate support network for money advice and inspiration. Ask questions, share tips, and celebrate your wins with a like-minded crew of 300,000+. And follow us on Instagram for Q&As, bite-sized tips, daily money inspo... and relatable money memes that just get you.  Acknowledgement of Country By Natarsha Bamblett aka Queen Acknowledgements. The advice shared on She's On The Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's On The Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards your needs.  Victoria Devine and She's On The Money are authorised representatives of Money Sherpa PTY LTD ABN - 321649 27708,  AFSL - 451289.    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

My name is Natasha Bamblett, I'm a proud First Nations woman, and I'm here to acknowledge country. Tii, gilinyan ganya, nianakaka yao yinbina waka, nianakai nianbina yakarumja, duminyagumiga dumiga ithawaka nirawaman daman imalan, mumibangada boma ininyalan waka, gaunan yakarumja, wutunarana. Hello beautiful friends, we gather on the lands of the Aboriginal people, we thank acknowledge and respect the aboriginal people's land that we're gathering on today take pleasure in all the land and respect all that you see she's on the money podcast acknowledges culture country community and connections bringing you the tools

knowledge and resources for you to thrive she's on the money she's on the money hello and welcome to she's on the money the podcast that lets you be pervy about other people's money habits for educational purposes of course welcome back to another one of our money diaries where i get the absolute pleasure of sitting down and talking to one of our beautiful She's On The Money community members all about their journey. Let's jump straight into it because this week I got a message and it sounded exactly like this. Dear She's On The Money, after going through one of the hardest things you can go through, I wanted to share my story in the hope it helps other mums navigating similar challenges. I always thought I was doing okay with money.

My husband and I saved 40 grand in six months and moved five hours out of the city to buy our first home. I thought we were on track, but after the stillbirth of our daughter, everything changed. The banks were no help and my workplace didn't know how to support me. I had no idea how many financial hurdles I'd face while also grieving. Now, I want to raise awareness of what financial systems look like in moments like this. Money Diarist, welcome to the show. Thank you for having me. Oh my God. I feel so privileged that you want to share your child's story with us and you want to talk to me. Oh, I just, and I know that that's probably not how, but like, thank you for wanting

to chat to us. No, that's okay. I'm very happy to share my story and my journey now that I've been through what I've been through and hopefully educate a bit more to everybody. Well, before I jump into the deeper questions, what great would you give your money habits from A through to F if I asked. Right now, I'm a C. You're a C. All right. Let's see what that's about. I need to be cancelled, honestly. But money diarist, can you tell me a little bit more about your journey? So I grew up feeling, you know, not ever worried about money. Both parents worked in local government. So it was always a safe money environment. There was never any issues. I grew up always watching my mum do a budget on a spreadsheet. And to this day, she still does it.

she still calls me once a month says I'm doing my budget today so I grew up you know watching mum do that and I have a memory of we won five thousand dollars once in the early 2000s and that was a huge deal oh in the early 2000s that's like 20 grand oh so my parents like paid a heap off the mortgage but we got a hundred dollars each me my brother and I that would have felt like a thousand at that point I went and bought a pokemon gold game for my game boy color and I thought it was the best thing ever so yeah good journey of money growing up always felt safe left school took a little while to get to my career and finally settled in that in about 2017 and slowly worked my way up and just kept working taking a few holidays here and there and then when the

pandemic hit I was very lucky kept my job worked from home actually got promoted and during that time in between some lockdowns is when I met my now husband. So you'd, how did you guys meet? We met in real life. Oh, what the hell? Yeah. So you met in real life. That just feels like almost fake, my love. It was in between some lockdowns, but it was still in the rules where you couldn't stand. You had to be sitting at bars and clubs and all that kind of stuff. So we met, like we weren't both planning to go to that establishment that night, but things went that way and he came and sat at my table because I looked bored so whoever you were with wasn't entertaining me as much so we um got chatting swapped instagrams and then had our

first date a week later kids these days you don't swap numbers no we swapped instagrams he felt a number was too forward and the snapchat was too seedy so instagram is where we went I like that there's a middle ground for us now we very quickly met and spoke about how we didn't really want to live in the big city anymore and after knowing each other for six months my lease was running up where I was living in a share house and he said well let's do this so I moved in with his parents and we knuckled down and saved 40 grand that's how you saved the 40 grand that's a lot of money to save in a short period of time like yeah okay moving in with the brand new in-laws was that challenging because I feel like I would have been so anxious like girl I don't know I feel like it

took literal years for me to go oh I don't have to be so highly strung around my husband's parents it was definitely experience it's also like moving from a share house to like a bedroom and all that kind of stuff so putting stuff in storage and downsizing a little bit but we knew it was going to be worth it to get out and move so in early 2022 we bought our house remotely we didn't actually see it in person we had to just do a FaceTime because things were moving so quickly that when we saw it pop up online we called them that afternoon they said come look at it tomorrow and we said we live five hours away so we got a FaceTime the next day oh my goodness property can be so hard and that just puts even more pressure on you like you just go oh my goodness like we're

have to do is FaceTime and make a decision really quickly. And I'm sure that they were like, there are lots of interested parties, weren't they? Yeah. Well, there was someone else at the house when they were walking us through virtually. Oh. So we very quickly put in an offer 20 grand over asking, but we still bought our first house for $400,000. Hey, that's good. Yeah. So it was a four bedroom, reasonably like freshly painted, had a pool, had a little shed, had a big yard. So we were like, yeah, compared to, you know, Sydney to out here, we were like. Born in like six, seven months from a share house to buying a house with a pool. I love this for you.

We were pretty proud of ourselves. A lot of people were still like, what are you doing? But that's what we wanted to do. We just, we didn't want to be in the big city anymore. We want a different lifestyle and we up and moved up here. So early 2022, you bought, how long was the settlement? Was it like normal standard three months? It was standard, but we had early access.

So we could, every weekend, we literally on the Friday night would pack up cars, we'd leave at like 4am Saturday mornings, come up, do stuff in the house, see our friends and then drive back to Sydney on the Sunday. Hey, not bad, but also you do what you got to do, right? I'm sure you don't miss those days though. Exciting, but also a long slog. Yeah. So, well, I moved up in July of 2022, but my partner was a truck driver at the time.

So he kept working in Sydney. So I was by myself at home in a new job too. I got a new job at that time. And I lived up here by myself during the week for the first six months of us moved up here. So you've been together six months, you buy a house, you live together for another six months. At what point does this man that asked for your Instagram handle become your husband? So he then proposed in September of 2023.

And at this point, we were pregnant with our first child. So we fell pregnant in the May of 2023. and he proposed over breakfast and he organized the whole thing from his truck while he was driving he got his mum to go by get the ring he asked for permission with a 10 pack of Jack Daniels to my dad's place all that kind of stuff that's so sweet organized it all remotely and was that like a proposal that you were like this is so me yes oh I love that and it was such a random restaurant he's like where do you want to go for breakfast and I chose one he went are you sure and I was like yeah it's just breakfast dude it's not like we're getting engaged but it actually ended

up being nice because it was like overlooking a park and all that kind of stuff so so cute so yeah so that's September of 2023 and he said let's get married quickly I want us to have the same last name all that stuff before the baby comes so the baby was due because you got like you were pregnant in may right and then you go yeah so the baby was due on valentine's day of 2024 how was your pregnancy because i feel like sometimes i was really crook so and then you know when you look back and find out why um i was really crook and we got to mid-november so we were getting married mid-november organized it all we did full diy on a friend's farm oh my god girl you were pregnant and planning a wedding and you would have been like heavily pregnant i was we got married i was

27 weeks that's a lot of weeks especially if you're feeling a bit trashy like yeah so we're in November I'm feeling a bit crook getting follow-ups and all that kind of stuff went to have a scan on a different part of my stomach and that part was near where the baby lives and unfortunately that's when we found out the baby had passed away no I was 26 weeks 26 no oh my goodness. Like, I don't know how that feels. And you know what? I'm not even going to try and say that I do because it is so different to anything I've ever been through. But just the idea that you weren't prepared for that. Like, it's not as though I don't, I can't explain it, but having been through, unfortunately now me, four miscarriages that were quite late term for two

of them, there were things that I was like, oh, I'm just feeling as though this maybe isn't right, but you were there for something else and then they were like by the way oh the fact that you didn't even go to those reduced movements or I just I really feel like something's up you just got completely blindsided girl that is not fair I was told I had an arterial placenta so I was told you won't feel much so me not feeling much was normal so on the Saturday afternoon I went oh I felt a kick and then the Sunday I went haven't felt much and you know we were told not to don't worry go in Monday afternoon for a scan on my kidneys and my bladder because I was crook and that's when they found out so this is Monday afternoon oh far I'm so sorry so we get up to the

hospital this is Monday afternoon my husband's just gotten back from thankfully driving back home not to Sydney tell him jump in the car up to the hospital get up to the hospital and they say you have to give birth no and I just went okay that's because I was not educated at all about what happens when this happens but you don't know what you don't know and in the nice way ever it's kind of nice that you'd not had any experience of this before reflecting all I got was a pamphlet sometime in my pregnancy saying stillbirth might happen to you and that was it so I get up to the hospital and we're chatting through when I'm going to give birth and that's when I drop that we get married that Saturday yep so we very quickly had to put a plan into place so that was the

Monday night I went back to hospital the Wednesday and I gave birth to my beautiful little girl did you get to spend much time with her yes yeah and she was the most beautiful little thing she's got the cutest little nose so I spent some time with her and then I had to stay in hospital until Friday of course so my husband went I need to be busy so he left and did all the wedding stuff so the marquee the food the alcohol all that kind of stuff so he went and kept himself busy with that honestly fair like I get wanting to be busy but at the same time I'm assuming every single person going to your wedding knew that you were having a baby yes we had kept the pregnancy quiet until 20 weeks yeah and then but everyone said that that's when all our family on what the Tuesday

they said, are we coming up now? And we said, no, leave us. We'll do this by ourselves. And so we did all the giving birth by ourselves, but friends popped around to the house to check on the dogs, for example, because you just, we just dropped everything and ran. And I just was told to rock up to the wedding really in my dress, which is what I did. Stop. And what is that like? Cause like you're marrying the love of your life, right? You are marrying the man I'm assuming of your dreams and that is like something that you look forward to and I'm sure since you were little you're like one day I'm gonna have the big white dress I'm gonna have a wedding and like you guys were so excited to get married it was like September to November it was an eight weeks that

I planned a wedding yeah hustling to get married and like there was probably I don't know I feel like it's a little bit romantic if you're pregnant and then getting married because it's just it's a love bubble like you're in this bubble of like we're having a baby we're getting married we're doing literally everything all at once what's that like like I'm gonna cry like I just oh it was a roller coaster I think I had not really been alone until I had an hour before I had to get ready for the wedding and I just sat there and I just went what has happened over the last week and one of my cats had come up to me and crawled up and noticed that the like she used to crawl up on my tummy and now she noticed there was nothing there and that that like her look on her face

and she's a cat that's no it's creepy hey yeah so yeah I just kind of I drove myself to hair and makeup and drove myself up to the wedding got changed at a friend's house around the corner and then walked down the aisle and we spoke to our celebrant the day I was giving birth and told her what was going on and she was amazing she's like okay what are we doing here what do you want mentioned what do you don't want mentioned so we kind of started the day like you know we reflect on what's happened and because of what's happened it shows how strong these two love each other and we associate my daughter with butterflies so you know we talked about the butterflies that were circling all that day stop and of course they were and I bet they just hung out the whole

day for no reason one hit me in the face as I was getting photos done yeah so then we got married and then then after that you then sit down and go okay what do you do now we're married and my husband had to go back into work he took a few more days off but went straight back into work was actually starting a new job as well which meant he would be home all the time which was great but I remember also having to call my work and explaining I said my daughter's been born sleeping and my workplace said what does that mean how do you guys not know what that means so that was really that was something to navigate and they didn't know what would the options were So thankfully now we've been through all the options, they have all the detail because I'm

very strong about educating that this is going to happen and for people to be prepared in all shapes of life. 100%. So that happens, you obviously take some time off work, then what does life look like after that? So in Australia, after 20 weeks or if a baby is born over 400 grams it's classified as a stillborn and therefore they get a birth certificate and you're entitled to the government benefits so I had two options which was the normal paid parental leave that every parent can take or a stillborn payout which is around four thousand dollars last time I checked which was recently which for me was about a month's salary and I looked at it and I went I don't think I can just go back to work after Christmas

so I decided to do the paid parental leave option but that just wasn't enough so I ended up going back to work two months earlier than I had hoped but you also probably had a bit more freedom and flexibility than the four grand payout is that right yeah I had the option like my husband made me a very strong person and he said if you're going to take time off what are you going to do so I did put in effort to like going to the gym and doing little bits for me made sure I did everything every day. I'm a very big Taylor Swift fan. So I spent a lot of time making friendship bracelets because I wasn't going to get to go to the Eris tour because I was due exactly when she was here. So when everything happened, my friends all came together and I

got to go, thankfully, six times. Did you actually? Yes. Oh my goodness. Your friends came in clutch. So I got to come down to Melbourne for three shows and I went to Sydney for three shows and that's just the most it was the most healing thing because I'm a very big swifty seen her multiple times and all my friends made me a bracelet with my daughter's name no stop so this arm was full of bracelets with her name which was beautiful so just it was a very healing time and then yeah I actually fell pregnant again just before I left for the eras tour stop that's so special as well. What's that like? What is it like having gone through that and then finding out you're pregnant again? Because again, and I'm not trying to make this about me, I think this is

definitely a completely different story, but I am the most anxious pregnant person ever because I'm just not good at staying pregnant. I have now lost four pregnancies and so being pregnant means that I'm quite anxious the whole time. I'm like, this isn't going to work out. This isn't going to work. But your situation, mine is nothing in comparison to yours. So like, how's that feel? With my first daughter's pregnancy, I was very much like testing every single day and

had to see the line get darker and it got darker and it got darker. And I paid for extra blood tests to make sure the numbers were rising. But with my second daughter's pregnancy, I don't know why, but I didn't, I kind of got the positive blood test and went, okay, we're just going to sit. Obviously my experience was going to be different. I had to start blood thinners immediately. I also was up at the hospital at 10 weeks and where I am usually don't go till 12 and then 20 weeks. So I had continuity of care this pregnancy, which I didn't have last pregnancy. I feel like you just need that extra hand holding process. I literally saw my OB and I'm in the public system. We don't have

a private option really where I live. But the public system when you're a high-risk pregnancy is honestly like I won't say flawless but pretty flipping good. Well I was high risk with my first pregnancy too so it was just very different experiences so when I got to 16 weeks and we did another scan they said it's now your choice what do you want to do I decided to come fortnightly yeah so because my first daughter's was growth restricted pretty much is what she's passed away from is malnourishment wow she was too small yeah my placenta was the issue it was full of blood clots and therefore stopped so you would have like start aspirin really early on yes that too so my biggest thing was seeing her grow so every two weeks i wanted to see i want to see

weight gain i want to see her longer yes see her tracking on the graph and the irony is that she was a week ahead every single week she's like mom mom stop stressing i got this i had kicks all the time but it was still it was very anxious time and therefore we didn't announce my pregnancy at all we kept it to ourselves and close family and friends only we just dropped on Facebook after she was born like surprise guys hey we've had a child so yeah so I got induced at 38 weeks which is I really pushed for because I just had physically had enough honestly fair like I'm not gonna lie I envy those women who were like pregnancy is so magical it's the best time I really worship my body girl I've never felt worse in my life like I trying to roll over in bed like

I did not enjoy it I couldn't breathe like I just felt like trash all the time I vomited on literally everything like one out of ten experience I envy people you know what I say this all the time to my girlfriends I'm like parenthood absolutely for me like I was born to be a mom pregnancy though that's not my journey I enjoyed it but I was just those last 10 weeks and especially once I got past 27 weeks it was still just every week was like is everything okay and even after that point was her weight tracking well yes she came out at 4.2 kilos at 38 weeks she was well and truly you did not need those extra few weeks nope no so I love that I love that so much so tell me a little bit more I guess you said you didn't go back to work what do you do for work and how much

money do you earn so I'm now back in my job which is an executive assistant in local government oh very cool and I'm on 88,000 plus so far oh hey that's good and does that like because it's local government does it increase every year is there like a plan yeah you have like steps so I'm I think I'm at that last step now in my grade and we get the like the CPI increase and stuff as well But at the moment, I'm just doing three days a week with a transition to be back full time in a few months. So tell me about your second daughter. When was she born?

How old is she now? She's seven months old. Stop it. Delicious. She is delicious. She's got arms like a croissant. I love that. My baby.

So when Harvey was born, he was like three and a half kilos, which is like bang on, like standard baby size. And then I swear he ate a different baby and like left the hospital. and he has been the chunkiest boy ever since and it is my favorite thing ever the little chubby wrists oh yeah she's she's got those she's so cute i love this so talk to me about money goals like you've bought the house you've got the pool you've moved like i guess interstate what is your big money goal what are you guys working towards so in the midst of everything that happened we also sold our house we went on this everyone when are you guys okay because we sold a lot of stuff we

sold our house and we moved another 30 minutes north and so now we're on a property that's like half an acre a lot quieter town but this still isn't the forever home so we're definitely starting to work towards getting some acreage something like five to ten just to have some cows and my husband can use his ride on mower oh my god so tell me about that because if you're you've sold your house you moved into this one and you're like on a little bit of land are you expecting that to increase in value and then move or like have you got a like little plan we spoke at the beginning of the year i'm like do we want to do anything in 2025 we said no let's just kind of settle into being parents and all that kind of stuff and let's just keep smashing out our mortgage

which we are so we've paid 19 000 off the principal already in 14 months the way we do it as well is I've switched to weekly repayments, but we also do $40 a day we send over to our mortgage. Great. So that we're doing something every single day because of the daily interest. Smashing down that interest. And for those of you who maybe haven't deep dove into like what that actually means, interest is calculated daily on your mortgage. So at the end of the month, they kind of go, oh, you have $1,000 interest due. But if every single day you are cutting that down that at the end of the day means at the end of the month less interest is owed and

therefore more of the money that you've paid off over that period of time actually goes to the real loan instead of the interest that is payable so that's a really smart idea some of them do it that way some of them don't so if someone's listening and they're like oh my goodness like money diarist a genius i'm going to do it don't just implement it like have a chat to your bank about what that actually means or your broker about how to implement that but money diarist that's quite smart. Well, we looked at it actually last night and we were doing the math. And if we didn't put anything extra, we'd only pay $500 off the principal a month. And that feels like nothing. But us doing it this way is paying an extra $1,500 off. Stop it. That's so significant.

Have you calculated how much time that will save you? I think so far we've already cut three years off the loan. Stop it. And you haven't even lived there that long. We've only been here 14 months in its house yeah and you've cut three years off so by the time you guys move again you'll probably be like 20 year mortgage or something hopefully yeah oh my goodness I love this for you do you have any other big money goals that you're currently working towards that's the main one is really just finding the forever home as nice and as quiet as it is here it's a I don't like the layout very much and it's obviously very cold and we've got just fireplaces and gas heating and I'm like I just want some ducted air con and I'd love to go on a proper holiday we went on a

honeymoon when I was eight weeks pregnant with my second daughter and that was not a vibe and we were on a cruise which was probably not the best idea like how can I make this pregnancy worse exactly and we it was one day I went am I seasick am I morning sick I don't know I'm just sick oh no like I'm not gonna lie the idea of being pregnant on a cruise girl you just really We wanted to watch the world burn. I really, I don't know what I was thinking. But anyway, because we booked it before we felt pregnant. Like, I think it was like in December after everything happened.

We were like, let's book our honeymoon. What a great trip. And then you get pregnant. You're like, I'm actually perpetually seasick. And now I'm going to get seasick. This is perfect. This is great. Oh, I love that, Pete.

Money, Doris, let's go to a really quick break because I have a lot more questions and we'll get to them in a hot minute. All right, Money Doris. We are back. And I feel like your priority is clearly smashing down your mortgage and you are really good at it. But do you have any investments? If so, what are they? What do you think about investing? I am in the middle of a bulk listen of the backlog of Shares on the Money. So I feel like investing is definitely front of mind at the moment. I have just started Sharesies. Yeah,

great. In the last week. But outside of that, I have just my super at the moment. And working in local government, do you get more super than the average birth? I think it's 12%. Yeah. And how's your super tracking? Are you happy with it? Have you been looking at it? Yeah, I've been checking it and I did notice a little dip. Obviously I haven't had super paid pretty much all of this year yet because I've been on Centrelink since the beginning of the year. How annoying because Centrelink has just updated to paying super as of July. So you just missed out on that. I'm so sorry and I'm not planning on any more babies so it won't be any pregnancy is not for me anymore we are done I'm two and done so I'm at 65,000 oh my god okay you're doing really well for your age

when I look back is I've only been doing super for 10 years just because when I started I was late to the game I didn't start working till I was about 18 because I had some big surgeries when I was younger and I couldn't do much so I didn't start working till I was 18 and it really with all the fees and stuff, I didn't really start getting super till 2015. So 65 over 10 years, I'm pretty happy. You're doing pretty well, even though it's tiny, that additional percentage that gets paid, like it does pay off over time. Like it doesn't feel like a lot. You're like, hey, I guess it's better than a kick in the pants. But then you look at it after 10 years and you're like, oh, actually that did significantly contribute to my returns, which is very,

very nice. Now talk to me. I need to know more. You bought another house, but we have no information on the debt that you carry. How much did the house cost? How much is your mortgage? What does all of that look like? So the house we're in now, we bought for $565,000 and that's on half an acre, four bedroom house. I'm so envious. And we had a 90K deposit from the sale of our first house. So we bought the house for $400,000 and 18 months later, we sold it for $482,000. Oh, very nice. And you guys had that 40,000 deposit. So you basically flipped that in 18 months to be from 40 to 90. And we added like an air con to it and all that kind of stuff. And then we now owe $475,000 on this house.

And how does that make you feel? I think we're doing really well. I think you're doing really well as well. I'm pretty happy with it. I'd prefer not though. No, I'm still waiting for the day we win the lotto because my husband wrote in his wedding vows that we would. Well, call me when that happens because I have a few good financial advisors that are literally with stuff like that um it's coming so you'll need their details right exactly exactly it's next week do you have any other debts so at the moment I have a credit card debt of about eleven thousand dollars and it's not pretty but it just shows that you kind of need that little bit of support especially when on paid parental leave I was

gonna ask like what's that made up of is that going on paid parental leave in your diary that you wrote in, you were like, I really want to talk about, you know, the awareness of financial systems. Did you go into debt after having your first daughter? I think so. I think we did. I had to cut back on a lot of things. I kind of went, I had about a thousand dollar a fortnight drop going onto Centrelink. I got a couple of leave options from work and I used those around bereavement leave and things like that. And then I went into Centrelink. So we're at the point that we were selling our house and the broker said, we're really sorry. We understand what you've been through, but the banks don't count Centrelink as an income. So right now you don't have an

income. So therefore we wouldn't have been allowed to borrow for the house we're in now. Which actually makes me, I own a mortgage broking company. So I see that stuff all the time and it makes me so angry because you could have worked with the same company for 10 years and then taken parental leave and had a legit Centrelink income. You could have been the most financially savvy person you could have saved for the last 10 years to take this period of time so financially you're not behind but the banks feel like you have no money bye it's not true but it's so frustrating so what did you do to get around that I went back to work early oh that's the last thing you needed was that really painful to go back to work I wasn't ready to go back to work I was due to go

back after six months and I went back after four and I feel like I probably needed a little bit more time but it's just the way everything fell and I believe everything happens for a reason so it's okay but it was really disappointing that the banks were just like sorry that you've had a loss and sorry that you're on Centrelink they wanted proof of savings that we couldn't you know it was tens of thousands of dollars that would that's just not there I'm so sorry that part of it makes me so angry because it's like where's the leniency like where anyway I won't go on and on about that because I absolutely could. So I want to dive a little bit further into this $11,000 credit card debt. Talk to me about that. Is that something that gives you the ick? Is that

something that you're like, nope, we did it on purpose because I have a seven-month-old and we knew that we're going to be behind and this is a tool and we're just going to smash it out later. What's the plan? That's the plan is to start smashing it out. As my income increases going back to work, I've redone my budget that I've been doing for years that haven't really followed. that's been there on and off but I've pulled it back up and gone no no I need to help smash this out as well so I'm changing like not it's not really a percentage it's just kind of working out okay there's going to be left over here that goes straight onto the credit card but it does kind of show you that at the moment $1,600 a fortnight is really hard to live on when you're

trying to do a mortgage food I mean thankfully she wasn't eating for a while but she's just started eating so adding in food fuel all that kind of stuff plus just enjoying your life so babies are just expensive like nappies expensive and they add up wipes and like who knows you might be using formula I couldn't believe how expensive formula is $40 a tin at the moment a week for her that's the same as what Harvey was on and it's kind of like even if you look at the cheaper ones Harvey refused them I tried to be like oh I did all my research I was literally on chat GPT being like the nutritional value of this versus this because like you know you don't want to do wrong by your kid I get the cheaper one and he's like what is this absolutely not mum and he also would

not take anything less than the bloody 30 dollar bottles like he refused oh yeah I had to switch bottles she didn't like the bottle he wasn't drinking out of it it was just rude I bought you this beautiful new bottle not interested I tried to buy the Aldi nappies because all of the mums on my Facebook group were like oh the Aldi nappies are great go and buy them and I'm like Slay, like 10 out of 10. For us, they leaked everywhere. I was like, what is this? Why do I keep trying my hardest and being picked? It was just building up slowly, but it's just things like, you know, she grows so quickly and next minute you're having to go buy the next size up. And you want them to look through as well. Well, yes, she's a beau girl.

Yes. Honestly, it was a money win for me when I gave birth to my son and they said, it's a boy. I remember on the first day I thought this is going to be great for our bank account as opposed to me then like is that a dress can I I'm just gonna go let me just have a look at that I'm a boy mom and still if I walk past country road and see the little girl outfits I'm like what is that that is the cutest thing ever I can't look away if I had a little girl I'd be done for I'd be cancelled I'm starting to find a dress for a wedding we've got to go to in a couple of months and it's just like oh my gosh she's only ever going to wear it once oh but it's so cute I'm on your chain please send me pictures because I live vicariously through

girl mums money diarist talk to me I feel like yes you're in credit card debt but I feel like it was inevitable given the situation talk to me though what do you think your best money habit is definitely become a points queen oh okay I love this tip so that was the reason just to get the credit card in the first place for things like I've switched to shopping at Woolies to get the everyday rewards we're flying for this wedding interstate so we've been like saving up the points for that kind of stuff but everything I'm we go to buy we go can we get points somewhere from this one year for five we just did all flybys one year and then that way at Christmas we'd earn $800 in flybys points so that was how we went Christmas shopping oh you're genius

so we're very much into points people like it's a dollar here or a dollar there yeah and over a it becomes $800. That's $800 you didn't have before, isn't it? So very much into points and just any way that we can get some more points. My team and I really like doing the like double stack. We're doing the points, but then we're also making sure that when we're accumulating points, we're also using cash back. So we like shop back cash rewards, literally any of it, who's giving the best discount or the best cash back, we'll use that. And I would like some fly buys points to boot thank you I think I've been on shop back for I want to say three or four years now smart and it's sitting at $470 that's Christmas but like even I did a shop the other

day and I got $20 back and it was like a bonds order or something for a hundred bucks and with the I think it was only a few days ago so with their sales and everything and end of financial year I got $20 cash back money win and that money just like stockpiles over in the side and then you'll have a couple of hundred bucks to make a decision with money win that is a good deal on the flip side though tell me what do you think your worst money habit is food yeah same girl are we eating out are we cooking expensively at home what's that look like no we're going through a drive-thru because do you follow me on instagram by chance yes have you seen how many times i go through the mcdonald's drive-thru can't stop won't stop i think as soon as i also was not

pregnant, it was like, give me the soft serves and the milkshakes. That's fair. And also, I mean, you'd think living 30 minutes out of town means that you don't have the temptation of the drive through. No, every time I go to town, it's on the way out of town. How do you say no to some GPs? For me, it's like a vanilla milkshake. Oh, a vanilla milkshake. Do you know what? I don't think I've ever had a vanilla milkshake. Does it just taste like soft serve? Pretty much. Okay. Maybe I need one of those on the way home. Just built it on. No, we're going to see that on the story tonight you will I'll be like the money diarist today not naming names so definitely yeah food and sometimes with concerts and stuff it's like I've got to be there not that I go to

many especially when regionally it's a whole thing to go to a concert coming back to Australia I just know that credit card would absolutely be slammed I'm on to you well going back a little bit I did that whole Taylor thing six shows I did all of that for under two grand which I'm pretty impressed with. A lot of nosebleed seats. Yeah. So you're still there. Which didn't matter. I feel like it didn't matter how far back you were. It was still the same vibe. I didn't sit on the floor at all, but I sat probably every angle of stadiums and didn't matter. I was, you're in the room. It really didn't matter. A hundred percent. I love that for you so much. Is there any other worst money habits to share? I feel like that's probably sufficient. I think so. I feel like you're killing

it though. Like you are an EA in local government, which is really secure job. 88 grand a year plus super and it's good super you've been through a shitload and to only have 11 grand of like credit card debt and also you're like within the process of like upgrading your home at some point I feel like you're fine yes that would probably be stressful when you look at it at 3am because we've all got blinkers on and that gives us anxiety right but I feel like in the big picture like sometimes when you have kids we do financially have to take a step back because it is hard like it is not easy to go through that process and girl you've done it twice in the last few years like two babies two periods of time where you've had time off two periods of time out of the

workforce like that's stressful and expensive then you said look I'm a C but then you're like also I'm a points queen like girl get it together are you a points queen or are you a C maybe we'll bump up to a B I feel like a B is far more reasonable like also it sounds like you and your husband are really savvy when it comes to finances like you planned a wedding in eight weeks yeah we do do you remember what you spent on your wedding because I have a sneaky suspicion it wasn't a hundred grand I think we spent eight see she's savvy my dress cost my husband's outfit cost more than me because he needed new boots new jeans new shirt new hat I wore the same boots I always have. And my dress was, I want to say $160 online. What? That is a money win. And I'd bought

it for my pregnant body because I still, and I still had a bump on my wedding day because I hadn't gone. I think the most of that eight grand was probably the celebrant and the alcohol. And even that we had so much left over. And so did you guys cater? I'm just so pervy. Did you guys cater that like yourselves? Cause you said that it was at a friend's farm, right? Yeah. So my father-in-law owns a butcher shop oh okay nice so we had literally the ovens did all the meat everything so one of our friends did all the catering we just ran it on generators I'm a C but you're a genius I love it I love it I hope that in the future when you're back down for a future Taylor Swift concert um we get to run into each other in person because I just feel like you

and I are going to get along like I think that you are a queen and I'm just so excited to share your story at the same time as just feeling like we need to be talking about these topics so much more. Like we shouldn't just be sweeping them under the rug. Like I want to know about your daughters. I want to know about what's going on, but I also want to know how hard it is financially when you go through those things. Like I hate the idea that you had to go back to work when you weren't ready. Like, and I feel like that's not like, oh, I had to go back to work too because my daughter had to go into daycare. Like it's a completely different story, like mentally, physically all of those things you were just not ready and I think that financially there should

be so much more support in that area yeah completely agree thank you for sharing your story thank you for being an avenue to be able to share my story I appreciate it of course of course you guys are always safe here money daris it has been a pleasure thank you so much I know that the community is going to love hearing from you as much as I've loved hanging out with you today. Thank you. The advice shared on She's on the Money is general in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision. If you do choose to buy a financial product, read the PDS, TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards

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