Sh**ged Married Annoyed - Ep 23. Did you hear about the Crab Girl?

Episode Date: July 19, 2019

This week on the podcast the beef gets serious! Rosie and Chris discuss first cars, inherited traits and a disturbing urban myth. There is also a brilliant question from the fabulous Roisin Conaty Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/sma. https://plus.acast.com/s/sma. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Rock City, you're the best fans in the league, bar none. Tickets are on sale now for Fan Appreciation Night on Saturday, April 13th when the Toronto Rock hosts the Rochester Nighthawks at First Ontario Centre in Hamilton at 7.30pm. You can also lock in your playoff pack right now to guarantee the same seats for every postseason game and you'll only pay as we play. Come along for the ride and punch your ticket to Rock City at torontorock.com. You're invited to an immersive listening party led by Rishi Keshe Herway,

the visionary behind the groundbreaking Song Exploder podcast and Netflix series. This unmissable evening features Herway and Toronto Symphony Orchestra music director Gustavo Gimeno in conversation. Together, they dissect the mesmerizing layers of Stravinsky's The Rite of Spring, followed by a complete soul-stirring rendition of the famously unnerving piece, Symphony Exploder. April 5th at Roy Thompson Hall. For tickets, visit tso.ca. Hello, you're listening to Shagged Maridonoid with me, Rosie Ramsey, and my husband, Christopher Ramsey, the soap dispenser killer.

People are raging about that, by the way. And rightfully so. Genuinely. I met someone at our management offices yesterday and they slyly put it into a conversation. Yeah, because you said you tapped that. Yeah. You did not tap that. It's not my fault you buy flimsy shit.

I tapped it and it exploded. But who's fixed it? You have fixed it. I have fixed it. Can I just say as well, I've also been watching a lot of Love and Hip Hop still. And when I said tap that, all I could think of was you had sex with the soap dispenser. Well, I did that as well, but it stayed intact after I did that. Sick.

It is episode 23. I think. Yes. I think it's episode 23. Yes, it is. It's episode 23. I think, yes. I think it's episode 23. Yes, it is. It's episode 23, guys. And before we start, a quick word from this week's sponsor. Lovely. This week's sponsor is garlic bread.

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Garlic bread. Garlic bread. For the dipping. You're on board with that now. Well, I do love garlic bread. There we go. See, some of the sponsors, the way this works, right?

The lucrative sponsors, we're getting some of them. No money. The money that of the sponsors, the way this works, right? The lucrative sponsors, we're getting some of them. No money. The money that comes in. No money. Now listen, sometimes they offer so much money that I just have to do it even if I'm not a massive fan.

You know, like shelves, I can take or leave shelves, but we'll have to advertise them because of the money they sent me. Obviously. Yeah, and garlic bread, you know, thankfully, you know, it's on brand. It's not on brand at all.

We have no brand. We can't even say the name of the podcast on television. We can't actually. It's ridiculous. We didn't even say the name of the podcast On television It's ridiculous We're stupid Yeah Stupid Right here's the jingle

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Why are you looking at us so weirdly? Yeah, sorry, I wasn't, I went to say something and then I was like, I shouldn't, so I just went, ooh, and I just like pursed me in. This is my bit. Sorry. Shut your face. Literally. Lovely episode we've got for you lined up this week.

Hasn't happened yet, but we are... I'm sure it's going to be good if it's not we'll do a take two like we did episode three still not going to release that by the way um it is episode 23 and first of all just in the intro there i remembered something um when i the worst night's sleep i've ever had in my life was when i was at a party once and i was drunk and they did garlic bread on the buffet, right? But they also had garlic mayonnaise and I dipped garlic bread in garlic mayonnaise. And I woke up, it must have been every 10 minutes for a drink. Dry, dry mouth.

Have you ever had it where your mouth's so dry off eating something like that? You're dreaming that firemen are hosing your mouth down and stuff like that. It wasn't a sex dream, don't look at us like that. That sounds like a pretty good dream. I remember once when I was younger and you know when you just get really crazy drunk because you're like i've got nothing to get up for tomorrow i'm gonna miss college probably wasn't that young but anyway i had a dream about lemonade yeah just drinking like downing lemonade and i had to go down i don't even i don't even know if we had

any lemonade but i was like i need a glass of lemonade yeah i've had them after kebabs on nights out where i'm like i'm in the dream i'm in a pool of water but i'm like drinking it as i'm in it and i'm just like one i'm like spitting in the air it's like an evian advert it's amazing you know what i find weird well just this is this you know segue whatever it's called i don't know what i'm saying um people who can eat kebab during the day madness it's a matter of ways utterly madness

it's disgusting it's minging yeah so yeah just got a kebab have you ever seen people walking through the street at about midday

with a pizza box with a kebab and chips yeah or a pizza box have a word I'm like what are you doing you shouldn't be allowed it's because Domino's

is open like all day now it's craziness do Domino's do kebab pizza no no pizza I'm saying if you want the pizza box. I'm talking about pizza box. You ought to talk about it. But yeah. We used to, Rosie, we used to get them for school dinner, man.

We used to walk with a chip. How am I not dead? Well, my friend at school had uncle owned the chip shop. What was it called? Tamos. No. No, it was on Bowling Lane. Okay. Anyway, we used to,

they had a table in there, we'd go in and I had chips and gravy every day for about a year. With a candle on it.

Yeah, just a little table. It was quite a walk away though, so I probably worked out I'd get a twirl on the way back.

Anyway, it's a long story. Can I just say as well, guys, obviously, thank you so much for getting in touch. If you want to get

in touch, we'll do the questions later on at shagmoudanoid at gmail.com. I went through the questions as well this week,

didn't I? You did, well done. I went through the um because we're pressed for time and i did them i forgot to tell you this and i remember just as we're talking about the sponsor there earlier i don't remember your name but whoever's done it it's really nice right but don't some it was a man right i need a reply to him on the email he's sent a paypal receipt he's sent with 10 quid like i read it and it was like this is me this is my sponsorship for your podcast and this bloke sent 10 quid that is so and i was like i was like what the hell and it says underneath if you don't collect it by like august the 6th or

something it'll just go back to him so i'm not gonna obviously collect it what what well well guys just if you're all listening We're on 4 million listeners now If you all sent me 10 quid I'm not saying, just hypothetically If you all sent me 10 quid, right We could just never do this again I mean, no, no, we'll do it forever

We'll do it forever That's so sweet though No, I'm joking Bless him, I need a reply to him actually I was just like, what the hell I was like, that's so lovely Very sweet, extremely cheap What do you was just like, what the hell? I was like, that's so lovely. Very sweet. Extremely cheap.

What do you mean? What, 10 quid? We've done 23 episodes. Let me just work that out. That's a 40, 48 pence an episode or something, isn't it? Possibly, yeah. You going to work that out? No, I don't even know how to work it out.

How would I work it out? Well, you would do... 10. 10. Divided by 23. 23. 43. Oh, my God. Did you. 10. Divided by 23. 23. 43. Oh, my God.

Did you say 43 pence? I said yes. Did you say 43 pence? No, I said 48. Oh, well, it's 43 pence. 43 pence an episode. 43 pence an episode. So, I mean, that's cheaper than an app that you'd download.

Yeah, but it's free. You don't have... Mate, if you're listening, thank you. That's very nice. But you will be getting that £10 back, even though my wife's an absolute money grabber. Get lost. I'm joking.

No, there's a seriousness in our eyes here. Although, to be fair, right, without getting into details and being gaudy here, you made me feel like a lottery winner at the weekend. Why? Because we went to get you a car, didn't we? Yes. It's time to renew your car. Went to get you a car.

And, guys, faithful listeners, right, you know the moments when we argue with each other and we're beefing and stuff and it was the one of the I just thought this is why I'm beefing

this is why I married you right we went in to the car place I don't want to get ridiculous it's not

geek flashy but it was you know we went in and Rosie being Rosie went right to the back corner in the four corner in the little dealership

you went right to the back corner didn't you so if you walk in right if you imagine it's from left to right, cheap to expensive, and then from bottom to top,

cheap to expensive, top right corner, straight over, biggest, most expensive car we've got. Right, well, I didn't look at the prices, though. I just thought we'd got my eyes drawn to. Well, I was nearly sick. Right, fair enough.

You walk past all the others, it was like they weren't there. I don't even think you saw them. I imagine in your head, you were going, why is there only one car in here? They're dead to me. They've become dust in my eyes you walked over the most expensive car

and i was like oh god here we go and you know it was you pay them the monthly so it's not like you're buying it all in one go and you know everyone's got people got nice cars now because you can put them away on the monthly so you know i was like yeah okay then yeah we can let's do it and i was looking i was like see what the damage is and i was like oh god and to be fair you didn't spec it up guitar you specced it quite low. You went, look, I don't need a steering wheel

or any of that crap. Yeah, yeah. And we nearly finalized on it and then you were like, oh, I'm just not sure, let's wait, I'll come back

and have a test drive. And I went, okay. Well, the reason I, let's be honest, the reason I decided kind of not to get it

was because you brought up the idea of, well, Rosie, you're working now, why don't you pay for this? And I thought, huh?

Well then, right? So then I changed people. Is that what it was? Like off. I couldn't justify paying that much. I think it was silly to pay that much. Yeah, so what we did was, but we're still going to, so we're left and so we'll come back and try and test drive

one day. On the way out of the forecourt, you were like, stop the car! So we stopped my car, looked, and you pointed at a car that was easily a quarter of the price of the one that we were looking at and said, I want that instead. I didn't know what was going on. I could have cried. I was weeping inside. The bloke showing around, his head was spinning.

He didn't know what was going on. I've seen nothing. His commission took a nose he was gutted well I just think it was nice the idea of getting this

lovely new car and there's something in you that goes oh my god this is wonderful and you know nice but then

my other the sensible part of my brain goes to right we've got a child have you ever seen him eat an ice cream in the car

it's the worst thing I've ever seen it's awful you don't let him eat in your car so he's got to eat some way it's like his head butting the ice cream it's like he's trying to get it cream in the car it's the worst thing I've ever seen it's awful you don't let him eat in your car of course I don't so he's got to eat some way it's like his head

butting the ice cream it's like he's trying to get it in through his nose it's the worst but you know he's just a kid and you know kids

I think cars family cars are meant to be a shit tip they're not meant to look nice they're not meant to be good

so I was like right we'll get that one second hand it's lovely it's still amazing it's really nice yeah it's got how many miles

well I'm buzzing so the guy's seen nothing like it. He didn't know what was going on. It was literally like, it was like, you know, the scene from Pretty Woman where she goes in and goes,

big mistake, and buys all the stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like she was about to pay for all that stuff and she looked across the road and saw a sports direct and went, actually, hold on.

I'll just get a paint track. Richard Gere's buzzing. Where's the bill? Get in! Well, you know my experience with cars, though. Yeah. I've told you about my first car that Get in! Well, you know my experience with cars, though. Yeah. I've told you about my first car that I had.

Yeah. So, you know, this is the second-hand car with hardly any miles on. Yeah. Still pretty brand new. It's very nice compared to my first car. Tell everyone about your first car. So, my first ever car. Well, I bought it from the boyfriend I had at the time, his brother.

Yeah. Right? It was 10-year-old. It was a Ford Fiesta. The really little, tiny ones. It was black. Had crazy mountain miles on. But I just loved it.

I think I bought it for like 900 quid, which probably was very overpriced, to be fair, right? Didn't your dad buy it? And don't you still own that money? Shh. No. Shh. Are you taking the mic?

No, I think my dad did buy it for us. But I think I did pay him back. Like, you know when you pay them back a bit and then you're like, you don't, you just forget. Yeah. So that happened anyway. Thank you, Dad.

Love you. Thank you. Don't tell, now Kate and Kevin are going to know they didn't know that. No? No. There's three of us.

You can't be telling. See, I'm not used to this siblings thing. Oh, we don't know what each other, what parents have bought for each other. Oh, heavens above. Well, actually, my dad took them on holiday a couple of years ago. There we go.

Right. Even Stephen's right. You were genuinely worried there. Well, yeah, because it's just a crack. Now, Kev's going to be like, well, what about? He's had everything, actually. Oh, yeah, exactly.

He's milked them dry. Damn right. Mistake. So, this car was really old. Sorry, accident. Don't call him was really old. Sorry, accident. Don't call him a mistake. He was an accident. If you had a thesaurus, probably the same thing.

Top three in a thesaurus, all right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This car was so bad that at first it was great and I loved it. Like, I was buzzing. I'd never had a car. First car, it's the freedom. Oh, it was amazing. And I used to take it everywhere.

It lasted a while, actually. It lasted about three years. It was the Freedom. Oh, it was amazing. And I used to take it everywhere. It lasted a while, actually. It lasted about three years. It was great. Until I met you. Yeah. And then I was like, ker-ching, we're going. Jesus. But anyway, you've been in this car a few times.

I have. It was horrible. So, thank you. She was called Eleanor, but that's fine. Eight people in the car. Great. So, she... She? was called elna but that's fine um so she she one day the uh the driver's door broke so you couldn't actually get in the car right so what i used to have to do it was okay when i was at home because

it was like it doesn't matter no one can really see is getting in the car like whatever if i went shopping or something right what i'd have to do was can really see us getting in the car, like whatever. If I went shopping or something, right, what I'd have to do was park up, put my stuff in the boot, and then I'd have to go in the passenger door. Right. So I didn't look like such a maniac just getting in the passenger door, climbing over. I used to go in the glove compartment and pretend I was looking for something.

I'd go in. I'd open the glove compartment. I'd kind of have a little rake around and then I'd shut it and like in a pantomime I'd make a big thing of going oh well I'm in I'm in now

I'd shut the door and I'd climb over to the driver's seat well why walk all I've had an idea why walk all the way around that would be crazy so I'd shut the door and I'd climb over but i'd still be like

making a thing of it like oh god do me here and putting the key in and going ah that was a good idea and i'd drive off every time and i never got it fixed the pantomime the pantomime of the woman with the broken door jesus christ good times What have we been up to? Not much, actually. Robin was still poorly. He was poorly for like a week and a half. Yeah. Lost so much weight, didn't he?

Bless him. Lost loads of weight, yeah. He didn't eat properly for about five days. And he slept almost constantly. Yeah. I mean, it was lovely. I feel really bad as a parent, but some of it was really nice. Well, the cuddles were amazing.

Unbelievable. He would lie on me. He fell. Since he was a baby, he hasn't lay on me and fell asleep. bad as a parent but some of it was really nice well the cuddles were amazing unbelievable he lie on me he fell he since he was a baby he hasn't lay on me and fell asleep and he lay on us and fell asleep and i was i was overjoyed it was lovely wasn't it just kind of chilling and is this hope is this how like munchausen syndrome starts just possibly telling me a lot of times you can get cuddles yeah oh god yeah it probably is it's kind of keeping keeping them at that level isn't it the chilled level well he's back now he them at that level, isn't it? The chilled level. Well, I mean, he's back now.

He's back with a vengeance, isn't he? Very much back to normal. One thing that I was quite thankful of and which has really made me have to address a situation that's going on in my life.

He was poorly, didn't eat properly for five days. I lost three pounds. Wow. Well, did you not notice? No. Great.

Right. That, but fuck you, do you not notice? No. Right. That, but fuck you, that is a weighted question. Any man listening, there is no right answer to did you not notice I'd lost three pounds. That is bait. That is a booby trap, and I'm not having it. Right? Let's run that out. Let's play that scenario out.

Did you not notice I'd lost three pounds? Oh, no, I didn't notice. Oh, you never look at me, do you? Not notice I was looking better. Not notice, did you not notice I'd lost three pounds oh no I didn't notice oh you never look at me do you not notice I was looking better not notice did you anything I had a glow about is you never notice me you don't look at us

what's happened why was the relationship gone flip side did you notice I'd lost three pounds oh yeah I did you look great oh so I'm fat all the time

well I know alright fair enough no winning there's no winning that fair enough throw it back in your face alright alright man I was just asking in a situational thing did you notice I know, all right, fair enough. No winning, there's no winning that. Fair enough. Throw it back in your face. All right, all right.

I was just asking in a situational thing, did you notice? It's a sad little song for all the men out there. It's a violin, actually. No, no, it's the last post on the bugle, isn't it? I don't know. But anyway, back to the conversation. I lost three pounds, and that made me realise that I just eat all of Robin's food

all the time and then yours and then mine well you do as well though to be fair chicken dippers it's starters isn't it since chicken dippers

and cheese strings came back in my life I've never been happier I know I've never been happier and it says on the front of chicken dippers it says approved by Mumsnet

so I can have like ten easy fine pommes oh pommes the rule should be when you open some crisps or someone you're allowed the first few that's the rule well I do approved by Mumsnet so I can have like 10. Easy. Fine. Pomb is? Oh, Pomb is. The rule should be when you open some crisps

or someone, you're allowed the first few. That's the rule. Well, I do because I don't think you should have a full bag of crisps so I take a handful out.

I'm kind of doing it. When I give them a big bag of Walker Sensations, I do take a couple of handfuls out. Yeah, the chilly ones, obviously. Mommy hot.

You're fine. Bless his heart You went on a hen do Didn't you I did go on a hen do Very good fun Like I've just

We went a bit mental On the first night Me and my friends I was a little bit gutted That you were away On a hen do Because I was supposed To go on a duck do

There's part of us That thought You're my father for this do you know when you're just your dad when you do stuff like that I am your dad sometimes

it's the oldest one in the group but considering you didn't know what like skin in a cat and stuff meant I thought okay I might be alright well I get that

I've made a dick of myself why is it called a hen do why is it called a stag do sexist is there something sexist I don't know one of them's for men one of them's for women so you've got to call it something oh because a hen's. Is there something sexist? I don't know. One of them's for men, one of them's for women,

so you've got to call it something. Oh, because a hen's a woman. I don't know. It should be like a hen do and a cock do. Well, I think a hen do is essentially a cock do, isn't it? It was, yeah.

It was great. Got really drunk and jumped in the pool because there was a pool in the house we were staying in and I shouldn't have. Really? Yeah, it wasn't very deep.

I probably could have broke my neck. Probably knocked your tooth out again. You love a bit of that. Possibly, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How long has it been since you knocked your tooth out? You due another one?

I'm due a good knockout soon. It's definitely in the post. Everyone else gets things from the dentist and you do a checkup. You get a thing going, you do a smash on your front teeth like a big idiot.

It'll come just before something really important. That's what happens. It's just before I might get off by this big deal. It'll come just before something really important. Yeah, yeah. That's what happens. It's just before, like, I might get off by this big deal and it'll be. Yeah, yeah.

I played foot golf at the weekend. Yeah, you did. Never played that before. How was it? Awful. Really? It was okay.

It was all the stress and frustration of a game of golf with the physical demands of football and it was pissing down and and and frustration of a game of golf with the physical demands of football um and it was pissing down and i fell on my bum that sounds like hell and my legs hurt and the next day you were pathetic and saying that you were i got in my car i got in my car and i went to press the pedals on my car and i went the pedals have moved this is we i can't reach them with my leg they've moved and i was like oh no your legs just

throbbing because you've been kicking a ball all day. I kicked, I've never, one of them, on one of the holes, I kicked the ball, right? You sort of tee off, you put it down, the floor was wet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I kicked it. And the next thing I knew, I was lying on my back.

Like there was no, I didn't realize I'd fell over. I mean, I was pretty drunk, but I slipped and it was like, I hit my head on the grass and everything. And I was like properly half knocked out. Really? It was like, I just, all I remember is going to kick it. And the next thing I know, I'm on my back. And my back's wet.

Yeah. And obviously, everyone's going, wah! Like, everyone. Like, honestly, you could get hit by a car. And my mates would be like, wah! Yeah, they'd love it. Loser! You could explode.

You'd get hit by a plane. Yeah. Wah! Look at him. Look at him spilling his pint. He died. Look at him. Okay, it's time for Watch Your Beef. Watch Your Beef.

Watch Your Beef. Beef. Beef. Beef. Beef. Ladies first. Watch Your Beef this week. Okay, my beef with you this you this week is just really short.

Okay. Which you'll be glad of. Right. You are a crazy slow reader. That is just hurtful. Now, you read so slow to the point where if I'm explaining something to you or if I've read an article and you'll go what's that i'll just tell you rather than saying oh have a quick read of that because

you take so long i've never known anyone to take so long reading and you're quite you're like intelligent right but you read so i know i do i can't help it It's really hurtful. Don't have a go at me. Have a go at me teachers. It's so slow. I know. It's bad, isn't it? I don't. Sometimes I'll pretend I've read stuff. I know.

Well, it's like if we're together. I've just picked up my phone for people. If we're together and we're reading something, I'm like, read that. And we're reading it together. And I'm like, and you go, no, no, no, no. Yeah, I do. I have to get your scroll back down.

And I'm just like, oh my God. I am the slowest reader. Do you know someone tried to teach us to skim read once? This is how you skim read. I was like, this is, it was horrible. I didn't know what was going on. I read all the words

but they were like, what was that about? I can do that, I think. I can do that. That's how I had no idea. It was, oh God, yeah. I'm really, I panic when I read

and then I have to read it again to make sure I've read it properly. Yeah. That's why I listen to audiobooks. I very rarely read. I listen to audiobooks because, you know I should let someone

else do the reading take your flipping lifetime I don't know how have you finished that book you started on holiday yes I did actually

did you actually yeah I did I finished it on holiday how long did it take you four years ages it was only a

pamphlet for the water park yeah so that's just that's a little one but you do read shockingly slow got you very irritating i'm just gonna uh quickly uh dive into my uh barrel of beefs here that i've got um you know what i've got one yeah i've got one that isn't on the list actually because i thought you were gonna have a beef with me and i was gonna retaliate to the beef but you haven't beefed this but i'm gonna beef it right back at you get in right love to beef my beef with you this week is you refuse when you're in the house and I'm on my way home to check what we've got in the cupboards in the fridge

oh you won't do it and you won't tell us what it is it's madness what do you mean well I'm on my way back and I'll be like right I'm gonna'm going to make something when I get in. Have we got such and such? Have we got, you know, fish fingers? And you'll be like, I don't know. And I'll be like, where are you in the house? Kitchen. Will you check in the freezer? No.

And you just refuse to check. And I come back and I have like one fish finger and one little potato waffle. Seriously. Do you want to go there? Let's go there. Let's flip and go there. Let's lift the lid on this shit, right? I am not your living chef, right?

I'm not a stock taker. We're not Asda, right? No, don't eat. Shut up. You ring me constantly because you work away, right? So every time you're coming home, you're like, what is there to eat? What is there to eat?

I could literally look in the cupboards and I could say 20 things and you'd go, no, no, oh, no. And I'm just like, basically, you've done it so much that your ground is down. So if you ring me and if I hear you go, oh, what's to eat? I just automatically flip to, oh, I hate you. I'm not playing this game. Don't even start. And then you, bringing this up,

because we actually had an argument about this last night, because you rang and said, what are you having for tea? What is it to eat? And I said, oh, I'm having a stir fry. And you went, oh, is there any of that fish left that Robin had the other day? And I went, yeah.

And I said, I'll bring us when you're at such and such roundabout, I'll put the oven on and I'll put it in for you. Which I didn't ask you to do. I didn't ask you to do that. Right, that's fair enough, but I don't mind doing that. So you can take everything back that you said

because I don't mind putting it in the oven. All right, I'm not that bad. You make it out like I'm horrible. So you're on me living, chef. Well, yeah, pretty much, right? Get us a hat, I'm done. I'd rather you did the stock taken. I'm not bothered about the chef bit.

Well, this is ridiculous. You rang me and said, is there any of that fish left? And I said, yes, it's a big bit, right? Obviously, Robin didn't eat all. Robin had a third of that because he's a toddler. It's an adult portion, okay? So I put in the bit of fish that you asked for. Flipping Henry VIII, you, Henry the bastard eight.

Oh, is there only one of them? Yeah, there's only one. Robin had the other one. Oh, well, I was going to have it in a sandwich. Right, okay, well, I'm sorry, but I thought you could just get away with one because, you know, you're not obese. You could just have one like a normal person would, you know. It's big.

And you kicked off. Well, what shop did you get it it from i don't know what shop i got it from how do you not know what shop you got it because i go this i go to different shops all the time i'm not a one kind of shop girl i could have got it from farm foods i could have got from sainsbury's i could have got from tesco i could have got from weight rose i could have got from asda it could have been from marcus and spencer's right pick one of them they've all got their own brands and then they've got the other different kind of brands. So I don't know where I got it from, right? I just put it in the oven.

The box was in the bin by the time you drank. Right, good. Oh, yeah. Now, the thing with me was, right, what you did was you went mental on the phone. You went, this is unfair, asking us to cook your tea. I went, I didn't ask you to cook your tea. I just asked if there was fish.

You implied. I implied nothing of the sort. You implied us to cook your tea. I just asked if there was fish. You implied. I implied nothing of the sort. You implied as to cook your tea. I'm not being funny, right? I would never ring you on the way home from work and ask you to... I don't know, I just wouldn't because I'd come in from work

and I'd just do it myself. Then if there wasn't the fish, you'd have to go back out to the shop. What difference is that 20 minutes of you from that roundabout to getting here? I didn't ask you to cook it. But you have before. I did it so that I wouldn't have to go back out to the shop. What difference is that 20 minutes of you from that roundabout to getting here? I didn't ask you to cook it. I did it so that I wouldn't have to go back out to the shop.

Right? Listen, right? If we're going to lay our cards on the table, right? The main reason I need you to cook my fish is because it takes me too long to read

the instructions on the back of the box. And it's normally gone off by then. We need to stop because this is going to turn into an actual domestic. This is still really raw

from last night. I honestly thought you were going to bring that one up. No, because that was a genuine actual argument. I don't think I wrote that down, actually. You were that annoyed. I was that annoyed. Fantastic. Right, here we go.

This is the solution. Yeah. I'd like a wage. Right. A chef wage. Okay, yeah. Okay. Check your bank. I'm sure yeah i'd like a wage right a chef wage okay yeah okay check your bank i'm sure i'm sure every friday you get a wage and i'm sure i got your car the other day well that's not nice oh yeah the oven's not on it's quiet what's that wow you're coming across

you're coming across great on here so i'm just glad of that to be honest that's the you swept you swapped it around as well you You were like, I'm not your white, your living kook. And I'm like, I didn't ask you to be. Don't turn it around and go you're sexist. You turn the oven on. I didn't ask you to. I didn't want you to. Quit while you're ahead. Seriously, babe. Stop.

Stop. Oh, don't, don't. What? Just stop. So there you go, guys. There's a little window into a real argument. Look forward to episode 23, take two. I need a glass of wine. It's during the day.

Do you see what I live with? Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo. Help change mental health care forever? Join the Sunrise Challenge to raise funds for CAMH, the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, to support life-saving progress in mental health care. From May 27th to 31st, people across Canada will rise together and show those living with mental illness and addiction that they're not alone. Help CAMH build a future where no one is left behind. So, who will you rise for? Register today at sunrisechallenge.ca.

That's sunrisechallenge.ca. This Friday. You must be very careful, Margaret. It's a girl. Witness the birth. Bad things will start to happen. Evil things. Of evil.

It's all. No, no, don't. The first omen. I believe the girl is to be the mother. Mother of what? Is the most terrifying. Six, six, six. It most terrifying movie of the year. The first omen in theaters Friday. Get tickets now.

Rock City, you're the best fans in the league, bar none. Tickets are on sale now for Fan Appreciation Night on Saturday, April 13th when the Toronto Rock rock hosts the rochester nighthawks at first ontario center in hamilton at 7 30 p.m you can also lock in your playoff pack right now to guarantee the same seats for every postseason game and you'll only pay as we play come along for the ride and punch your ticket to rock city at torontorock.com it's time for questions from the public public public public i read them this week and you know people actually write question from the public public public yeah yeah yeah it's literally in the subject thing it's like all these because at first i was like who the hell's tied this and then I read it in your bit and I was like oh they're

doing it in her what we don't realize is that we've actually done it for weeks now it started off as a joke and now it is the thing yeah I still need to do a jingle for it

I'd kind of be asked I'm good man I don't want you doing any more singing around the house you're doing enough oh great enough you are

going on a knob and I don't know why I married you oh wow and we're staying together for the podcast not even for a kid

for the podcast see guys you are all our children yeah if you want to get in touch as always it's shaggedmarriedannoyed at gmail.com or Rosie's Instagram you can as well but not mine because I don't read your messages because loads of you are dicks

yeah in general public not just people listening if you're listening you're probably not a dick but uh our listeners are gorgeous yeah they are really lovely some of the emails are genuinely and again i when i was reading them yesterday i just thought as a quick disclaimer guys we're really sorry that we can't reply to them all and that we can't put all the questions in it is literally insane i think we're going to get the email soon from google mail saying you're full like do you think it's yeah it's mad i've got more emails in that than i've got on my actual gmail and i've had that for like 10 years it's craziness i might

spend a day going through and replying them all but we'll edit that out because that's a lie right we'll see um first question hi rosie and chris what do you call the end bit of the bread such good questions i have never heard so many variations i did a poll at work i just put yes look what you've started uh i was amazed at how many different ways you can say the end bit of the bread. Right. Most colleagues called it the outsider. Hang on. I know what we call it, but just a minute.

Yeah. So most colleagues call it the outsider. Two called it the heel. One called it the back ender. And a few called it the door stop. What the hell? She's always called it the door stop. What the hell? She's always called it the bum bit. Right.

My one I call it hasn't come up yet. No, no. Wait, should we say what we call it at the same time? One, two, three. Crust. Done. It's the crust, isn't it? It's the crust.

Yeah, the crust. Nobody's mentioned the crust. That's what it is. Do you want a crust of bread? The end bit is the crust. What are these lunatics? The outsider, the heel, the back. That's what it is. Do you want a crust of bread? The end bit is the crust. What are these lunatics? The outside are the heel, the back end are,

and the door stop. Jesus. And the bum bit's a bit weird. The bum bit's really weird. She said it's because it's the curvaceous part. And her nan called it the bum bit. Right. That's really strange.

Yeah, maybe if you've got two next to each other. Who's baking your bread? The back end of it looks like an arse. I've got no idea. Yeah, the crust. I did, when I was in, when i lived in manchester i asked a guy at the chippy for a chip buddy and he looked at us like i was mental well that's a totally different that's another one yeah and i remember it was when twitter when i first got twitter and i was like

it was cob bomb bap muffin and obviously i call it a bun or a buddy but it's like a chip bomb a chip bap they do a thing in um i, a chip bap. They do a thing in... I heard a comedian talk about it once. They do a thing in Wigan called a wet baby's head and it's a pie upside down with gravy on it. Yeah, yeah. I love pies, you know. Just not even content there.

Just I love pies. It's just something... Pies, right, is something that I never ever eat or buy just not even content just I love pies it's just something pies right it's something that I never ever eat or buy because it's just like well it's like

it's got a bad connotation well because they're a bit fattening it's full of like have you ever seen a pie being made the butter that goes into a pie no I do love butter though butter has sponsored this podcast in the past

well yeah but it's extremely fattening if pies are listening get in touch free bentos. Yeah, I don't like pies. What? I know.

I don't like, I don't know if I want to break that to you or not. You don't like a pie? No, when we did foot golf at the weekend, me and the lads, we went into the clubhouse for a drink afterwards and all the lads got a pie each and they all sat eating the pies and it was just minging. They're just the most minging things I've ever seen. What kind of pie was it?

I don't know. Like dark brown insides. Mints. Oh just minging. They're just the most minging things I've ever seen. What kind of pie was it? I don't know. Like dark brown insides. Mints. Oh, mints. Oh, God. You don't like a pie? Well, just like me mate bit it and like he turned it upside down, right,

and he bit the bottom and then it was like a cave. That's a good technique. But it just looked like a cave with smoke coming out of it with all this nondescript meat inside and like sauce. It was horrible. How can you make something so delicious sound so awful?

Because I'm a writer. I'm creative. It's what I do. Should I make you a pie? No. Because I guarantee, no, listen, I'll make you a pie and then you'll eat it and you'll go, I love them. Right, I've got a good pie recipe.

Come on then. What's going on with the pie? Chicken, leek yeah mushroom right and then like a nice lovely like white kind of sauce

I forgot to mention I do like chicken pies oh fuck off you are I genuinely do you are I used to get an open breasted

open chicken pie so you do like pie no I like chicken pie so what is wrong with you I don't like I don't like I don't like the ones that come

and they're little they're about the size of your hand and they're in a little foil thing and they get hot and it's about the size of your hand and they're in a little foil thing and they get hot and it's all brown inside. A pie? That's a pie? Okay, well, I only like a certain kind of pie.

Do you like the posh ones which don't have the bottom pastry and they have that shitty bit of flaky pastry on the top? Yes. A pie, I knew you liked the pretentious pies. Stupid pie where it's like just a bowl of casserole with this massive big flake hat on. Yeah, it looks like just a bowl of casserole with this massive big flake hat on. Yeah, it looks like a sponge you'd wash your car with.

I've had them. They're the only ones I've had. Yeah. Greg's mince and onion pie. Do you know what it is? Something's coming back to us now. I think I remember someone, stop that. I think I remember someone at some point in my life eating a pie and going oh, I've got like a bit of gristle or bone or whatever and just spitting it out on the floor

and then me just thinking I'll never have that ever it's one of me weird things again that I've done oh god yeah I just you are programmed so

it's weird innit yeah it's weird like yeah so you've seen someone eating a pie and somebody made a little comment about the pie

and now you don't like pies um when i was doing my comedy central show right we would be in the offices writing it for weeks and weeks and weeks and would get these amazing sandwiches from this this sandwich place it was me and jason cook and scott bennett two comedians i was just i work work with jason a lot known jason for years so he knows how i'm wired the same as you do so one day right towards the end of production we're eating these

chicken sandwiches and Scott went oh I've got a bone in this and I was like oh god and I like couldn't eat my sandwich I was like

we're never getting them from there again and Jason was like I got a couple of bones months ago but I didn't say anything because I know how mad you are

so that was that with the curry houses we've had about six different curry houses that we go to because anytime that you have a curry and you've got a slightly upset stomach the next day, you're like, nah, I got ill off that curry.

Whereas every time we get an Indian take, we have always got a bit of an upset stomach the next day because it's like the spices that you don't normally eat. But that's just, that's what happens. Whereas you're like, nah, never go back there again. Well, the other day

you said you said can we get one from the one we normally go to and I said oh no it's hurting me straight I'm not going and I went I'll give it one more chance

I was fine yesterday I know absolutely fine you're the weird one in your head in your head crying crying

don't know the words but it's good that you know yeah I do know I know I've got yeah I know I've got issues I don't know the words. It's good that you know. Yeah, I do know. I know I've got issues. I'm dealing with them. I mean, I'd say it's something that I love about you, but it's not.

Wow. Ouch. I love other things about you, obviously. Good job. But that is not one of them. That is the thing that I hate most about you. All right. Wow.

And we'll be having pie for tea. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, bah! Okay, got one here. Hi, Rosie and Chris. When you are at the doctor's surgery, do you sit there and go on your phone, read a magazine, et cetera, or do you talk to the other people in the waiting room?

I am a phone slash magazine person, but my mum would talk to other people. Is it a male-female thing? No, it's an invasion of privacy fucking weirdo thing, I'm going to be honest with you. I think it's probably the one time in life when I wouldn't talk to anyone because you don't know why they're there. Yeah, all right, what are you in for?

Yeah, what's the matter with you? Don't look ill to me. It's like no oh god I've just remembered a story what

that I tried to tell in my first stand up and it didn't I had to drop it out of the routine because it didn't work because it was too weird and I've just remembered it now

right right so my first ever routine was about the gum clinic I was younger the gum clinic is the sexually

transmitted disease clinic so I had to go to the clinic to get I was younger. The gum clinic is the sexually transmitted disease clinic. So I had to go to the clinic to get checked. What does it mean, gum? Yeah, gynaecology. Urinary. Urinary.

Something, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mistakes. Mistakes, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think it's chewing gum. If you get chewing gum stuck on your tiddler or your... Labia.

That's where you go. You're going to get gum taken off. Just scrape, freeze it then scratch it off. No, they're not going to do it with a blowtorch. They do it the other way around. Just scrape, freeze it, then scratch it off? No, they do it with a blowtorch, do it the other way around. great,

okay. They got shut down. No, in serious life, they'll go, because it's actually great. Yeah, yeah,

yeah, cool, yeah, always get checked out. We've been loads. Yeah, loads, we go once a week,

make a trip, I know all the stuff. No, I went, we got a Christmas party. I've got a good story about the company. I went, right,

and there was a lad and it was weird there was this lad he was talking and was in there and I was sitting I was only young I was only around 17

and I was sitting there like worried and this lad was there opposite us and he was talking to us right and I remember thinking you look weird

right like you look strange and he's talking and was asking what's going on in that and I was like you look there's something I can't put my finger on what it is with you but you're weird he's talking, was asking what's going on in that. And I was like, you look,

there's something, I can't put my finger on what it is with you, but you're weird. He had like, he had a skinhead, right? And I was like, you look really strange. What do you mean?

Like, lost his cover? No, just, he's something, I couldn't quite pin what it was. Right. But he looked, I didn't know him. I didn't recognize him.

But I was like, something about your face and the way you're speaking to me is strange and I don't know what it was. And he was talking and talking and talking. And he was just sort of talking around the subject. I think we might have had people we knew in common.

And then he got on to why you're here. And I was like, oh, just coming to get sort of checked, you know, just to be safe. And he went, yeah. And I went, what about you? And he went, crabs, mate. Crabs. Crabs all over. I've shaved my head.

I've shaved my eyebrows. He had no eyebrows. No. That's what it was. I swear down. He'd shaved every bit of I've shaved my eyebrows. He had no eyebrows. No. That's what it was. I swear down. He'd shaved every bit of hair on his body to try and starve the crabs. Did it get okay? I don't know, but he had no eyebrows.

And I remember telling it on stage and people thought I was lying and it wouldn't work. The story wouldn't work on stage because people were like, it's so weird. But I was thinking, why do you look weird? And until he went, I went, you've got no eyebrows, man. You've shaved them off. He went, oh, crabs. In your eyebrows? Everywhere. It was minging. thinking why do you look weird and until he went I went you've got no eyebrows man you've shaved them off he went aye crabs in your eyebrows everywhere

it was minging so weird such a weird bloke I've never had crabs but I don't know anyone who's had crabs I've never seen a pubic crab I've seen real crabs obviously

but what do they look like pubic what do crabs look like tiny little real crabs are they actually real crabs yeah exactly What do crabs look like? Tiny little real crabs. Are they actually real crabs? Yeah, exactly the same. Tiny, yeah. Like crabs? Yeah, yeah.

If you go to the beach during mating season of crabs and you don't get a wash when you get back, that's how you get them. That's stupid. I nearly, though. Did you? I nearly.

At what point in that did I lose you? Did you stop believing it? Well, at the beach. I don't know. I don't know if I was listening. Did you ever hear the story when you were in school about the girl who masturbated with a crab and loads of little baby crabs hatched inside of her.

No, I didn't because I didn't go to school in the Twilight Zone. That's the worst thing I've ever heard. What the hell's wrong with you? Put me off masturbating with crabs. Yeah, because you were the girl.

Is that on your face? I've never masturbated with a crab. Let's put it that way. The girl who masturbated with a crab. I mean, obviously it's not true. Well, I don't know. It's a truth. Something you'd probably see a video of it on your as a girl who masturbated with a crab I mean obviously it's not true well I don't know it's a truth something you'd probably

see a video of it why would you what are you trying to do pickle it I don't really honestly you know when you're like 14 and you don't really

know what anything is and people are telling you like oh my god there was so many of them I can't even go into them but there was so many of them horrible stories stupid stories

yeah not true I think if you're listening and you are that girl yeah tweet in So many of them horrible stories. Stupid stories. Yeah. Not true. Oh. I think. God. If you're listening and you are that girl. Yeah. Tweet in. Let us know.

Type with your crab claws. She's just a crab now. She's literally a fully born crab. She's going to play Sebastian in the new Lion King. Lion King? Yeah, the Lion King. Sebastian? In the Lion King?

Oh, fuck. Hey! Look at that! Look at that! Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, bah! Got one here. Dear Rosie and Chris, in episode 16,

Rosie told a story about wiping her bum on hand towels as a child. How come I forget that classic? Great, can't wait to talk about that again. And I have a story that happened to me very recently,

similar to this, but ten times more horrifying. Recently I was on a girls' holiday in Mallorca and one night we came back from a meal and drinks to our apartment. Brackets, before I carry on, it is important to note that all the doors and windows are locked and the only other key to the room was at reception. This is like one of them things, it's like a riddle. The man is found dead. Everything is locked.

What happened? His clothes are on the ceiling. What happened? Let's take us back 24 hours. When we arrived back to the room, we went into the bathroom to find a massive poo stain on the bath mat, but no poo itself.

Just the stain. What? None of us were the culprits as we went into the bathroom right before leaving to look in the mirror and there was no stain to be found until the second we arrived back. The stain is unexplained still to this

day and frankly it upsets us still. My question to you is, have you ever had anything really weird and mysterious happen on a holiday? Couple of things. My question is, whose is that stain? That's her question. That's her question.

That would bug me. The best bit of this whole email for me is the words, the stain is still unexplained and to this day, it frankly really upsets us still. When you can see them all talking about me. I love the idea that they're all

sitting around and they all just start crying. Who was that? Rochelle, just admit it. Admit it was you. Don't mention the bath mat. You'd had them dodgy prawns the night before.

It was you. It was you, man. So minging like. It must have been one of them. It had to be. No one breaks into your room, gets the key from reception, wipes their arse on your bath mat,

then goes back out. Do you live in the same world that I live in? The crab masturbating girl world. Yeah? That would happen. What's the crab masturbating girl world? Yeah, that's her. It's her. She's now the crab masturbating girl

who wipes her arse and puts her back on. It was me. Look, it was me. I was in the hotel down the road. What hotel's got a bath mat? Surely a towel,

not like a bath mat. Well, I think, well, maybe. Must just be a foot towel thing. I don't know. Oh, God. Strange things happen.

What was the last, what was the question? The question is, have you ever had anything really weird or mysterious happen to you on holiday? Not that weird. Uh,

this is, I don't know if this is weird, but do you remember when, um, I went to Dubai with my friend? Mm-hmm. Because we've got a friend who lives out in Dubai.

She works there and we booked this really nice hotel as like a treat and the people who work there blatantly thought we were prostitutes

quite right like I have no idea you got stopped on the way in every day every day people would just walk past us

and we get stopped going to our rooms every single day to the point where I went to reception and I was like can you please just stop stopping us we are staying at this hotel we're not prostitutes trying to run a business out of this hotel room do you know what i mean the bath mats are clean yeah the punters are quiet we are using protection

two of them we're using two of them oh god double double un-up it was really irritating and i was like i do not high end possibly prostitute yeah mid-range babies we did look like prostitutes because it was dubai everyone was really posh we had like primark cover-ups on and that and probably yeah yeah i can see where they're coming from yeah yeah i love the 180 you've done on that well you know now looking back I've seen the pictures we did look a bit sluggish so yeah very good babadoo babadoo babadoo

bah dear Rosie and Chris I seem to have inherited a really annoying trait from my mother she loves to preempt what you're about to say when you're telling her something

it annoys the hell out of me but yet when my other half is telling me something i subconsciously find myself doing the same i don't think he's picked up on it i hope i try and stop myself before i sound like a total prick do either of you have any annoying inherited traits passed down from your parents which really bug the shit out of each other cheers and that's from mark very good question very good i love that can i just first say that preempting what people are going to say it is minging like it is a minging so given i was reading that and i don't right do an example of that so you tell me right um so i'll have to like

do it to you so you um explain to me now what you did at the garden center yesterday with robin okay well at the garden center yesterday went inside and uh we went straight to the soft play softly yeah in a soft play robin was desperate yeah for a drink of water um yeah had his drink of water i got a jack of potato obviously because i like jack potatoes yeah and then we went we fed the fish. Fed the fish, yeah. You fed the fish like that. Is that what it is? It's that kind of trying.

I mean, I couldn't get in as quick, but it's that kind of, I'm assuming that's what they mean there. It's really irritating. But what's even more irritating, so do all this again. This one's more irritating. Tell the story again.

I know someone who does this and it makes us want to go crazy. Right, okay. So we went to the garden centre yesterday. Ron was really thirsty, so we went and got a bottle of water before he went to the soft play. I got a jacket with Tate

or probably shouldn't have because I'm trying not to eat any carbs. But wow, stop. It's far. God, it's so annoying. It's so irritating. And you want to go, you literally want to go,

will you pack that in? Shut up and listen. What are you agreeing at? I didn't say anything for you to agree at, you fucking weirdo. Stop it. Do I do that though?

It's not you. No, okay. No, no, no, it's not you. Have we inherited any traits from our parents? You've got your mum's air. I've got the air. I was just going to say.

The first thing I thought about when they said that. So if you say to Sandra, if you say to Rosie's mum, like, oh, I've got these clothes that I don't want anymore. I'm just going to throw them out.

The other day, I went to throw an old T-shirt in the bin and I thought she was going to physically hit us. But you'll go, I want to throw these. And she'll go, eh? Eh? You thought, eh? Eh? Give them to me?

Charity shop? I'll give them to me? I'll give them to her. Eh? How much? Eh? It's this ridiculous, eh? And you do it, like like pitch perfect to the point of

where it's exactly the same we sound a lot like each other yeah but it's exactly the same you know coffee there coffee's only three quid for a coffee it's properly exact it's a carbon copy the one you do it's exactly the same

yeah what about you well i've noticed that i do i sound a lot like my dad if i'm kind of like getting a bit exasperated and shouting about something but not if i'm doing it on stage on stage it's different yeah but if it's like in real life i'm like you're pretty pretty putting them there for i remember like it's like my cousin used to do like take the makeup my dad and be like what the fuck's that going on here and he like his voice goes like he goes like almost like what the fuck's that got on here and he like his voice goes like he goes like almost

like a Geordie Popeye yeah yeah and I do exactly the same eye yeah and it's just I hear myself when you put them

what you doing that for what did you put them away for it's probably weird yeah so I've got that as well well you know we are just we are morphing into our parents

yeah like completely yeah it's when you hear yourself do something like your parents did and you go like this is a moment

where I know I've done exactly that I did the go away at a robin the other day I heard it from the other room I could hear that I know

it was when he was jumping on your back yeah so your mommies go go away when we were kids she'd just we were annoying she'd be like school, go away. When we were kids, she'd just, we were annoying her.

She'd be like, go away, go away, no, go away. That's so weird. And I did it the other day and I was like,

oh my God. I thought you were doing it ironically. I heard you doing it. I was like, oh, she's doing an impression of her mom. She was winding them up. I was like,

go away. That was genuine. Oh God. But we used to, well, when she was like, if I hear mom one more time, so we'd all be like, Sandra, to, well, when she was like, if I hear mom one more time, so we'd all be like,

Sandra, Sandra, Sandy, Mrs. Winter. Oh, God, I hate this name. The other day, Robin asked for the sprinkler on, and it was a lovely hot day, and I just literally plugged it in, and I put the sprinkler on. Do you remember when you'd ask for stuff like that from your mom and dad, and it was like you'd ask them for a kidney? Do you know what I mean? Oh, yeah, yeah.

Can you get such and such out of the loft? Oh, God. Like. Can you get such and such out of the loft? Oh, God! Like the loft was in France. I don't think I ever seen inside my loft when I was a kid. Nah, they would never

get anything from the loft for us. They would never put the sprinkler on. Never get anything out of the shed. We thought, play with that.

It's a box. Play with the box. The empty box. Well, because we mollycoddle our kids these days. It's ridiculous. We were dragged up. Yeah, but he's like, Daddy, can I have a sprinkler? Yeah, a sprinkler's on. There you go. Well, because we mollycoddle our kids these days. It's ridiculous. We were dragged up.

Yeah, but he's like, Daddy, can I have a sprinkler? Yeah, a sprinkler's on, there you go. Padding pool, yeah, for the paddling pool. Well, the difference

is I tell him no. You tell him yes because you're not here all the time. So it's easier for you. But I'm the favourite. You are the favourite. I am favourite at the

minute and it's killing you. Well, right, okay. It kills us and also I'm really glad of it because he asks you for stuff rather than me. Yeah.

Like stuff like that. Yeah. If he asked me to put the spray down, I'd be like... If I have to get up off my arse, he asks the same thing. But who's your company when you want to cuddle? Huh? Me. Weirdly still me.

Oh, God. Okay. Maybe I am a bit sad about it. Yay! It's time for this week's celebrity question yay and this week it's from the fantastically funny and awesome Roisin Conaty

and just as a little plug not that you'll need it but Game Face series 2 her sitcom is on channel 4 now it's amazing really good we need to watch the second series I'm going to wait until we've got them all so we can binge them well we binged the first one didn't we great yeah sounds like it's like it sounds like it's just slip we're tenor for this no it's you know what credit where credit is due christopher it's really good she's extremely talented and here's a question

hi chris and rosie it's bracing quantity here your old pal. I have a question. Which character from a sitcom or just fictional would you say you were both most like? Please discuss and provide evidence for any theories, no matter how rude they are. Yeah, lots of love. Bye. Oh, I like that. Nice question. I've got one straight away.

Really? I think we are Marge and Homer Simpson, but I'm Homer and you're Marge. That is bang on. Do you think it is, isn't it? Yeah, I'd 100% agree with that. Yeah. I would 100% agree with that.

I'm Homer. Yeah, you are. I'd eat butter off a stick. Yeah, you're a s with that. Yeah. Yeah. I would 100% agree with that. I'm Homer. Yeah, you are. I'd eat butter off a stick. Yeah. You're a slob. Yeah. You're a horrible slob. Yeah.

You can't do the dishwasher. You leave clothes everywhere. You will just sit on your arse and ignore the child. And literally what we just said there. Yeah. Yeah. Love caravans. He loves a caravan.

He had a motorhome in one of them. Remember? Oh, he's done everything. He's beat the space of the lot. Who would you say? Oh, wow. Yeah. I don a motorhome in one of them. Remember? Oh, he's done everything. He's beat the space of the lot. Who would you say? Yeah. I don't know if I can beat that. That's absolutely blinding.

Weirdly, do you know who I like? Oh, God. Now that I'm about to say it out loud, it actually scares us a little bit. Do you know how I'm full on properly like deep down? Who? And I've never really said it out loud because I know he's supposed to be like the weirdo, full on properly like deep down and I never I've never really said it out loud because I know he's supposed to be like the weirdo

Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory yeah yeah yeah yeah oh is that not a surprise to you? no I thought I was like getting off my chest you're just like yeah next question like mainly it's when he walks up to the sofa

and he goes you're in my spot and I have to move and everyone else thinks that's rude but that's his seat let him sit in his seat But mainly it's when he walks up to the sofa and he goes, you're in my spot, and they have to move. And everyone else thinks that's rude, but that's his seat. Let him sit in his seat. That's his thing. Yeah. You've got traits of it, I think.

Absolutely. I think that's the thing. You're supposed to laugh at it and go, isn't he weird? And I go, he's bang on. They're all weird. He's bang on. You agree with all this.

For me, he's the main protagonist. I'm seeing it through his eyes. All the rest of them are weird. I'm like, look at these dicks he lives with. Who else could you be like? Who's like just an angry, angry character? I'm not angry. No, no, you're not angry, but you're inside.

You get angry about strange things. You hide it well. But you're lovely. I feel like I slag you off all the time. You're very lovely as well. The point of the podcast. Well, I know. No one listens to hear we're bloody gush about each other.

Good, because it never happens. 40 minutes of silence, bitches. I can't think of the topic. Who was that guy, the one, that really big series in America? Oh, Curb Your Enthusiasm. Curb Your Enthusiasm.

Right, Curb Your Enthusiasm. That's you. Yeah. That is you. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're a bit of a dulled down version of him. No, absolutely. Yeah, 100%.

So something will happen at the shops and I'll sit and the whole day I'll stress about it and how I've upset someone or whatever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you know what I really hate? I love this question, but I hated all the way through school it happened, people who would say that they were like Phoebe from Ferns.

People would be like, I'm so Phoebe. Fuck you. No, you're not. No one's like Phoebe. That's why she's that character. Phoebe is her own thing. She's the worst which friend's character would you be not phoebe hated her rubbish terrible character she was selfish she was just you know she would rather knock out a one-liner than help someone she had a moment she was the worst and everyone was like i'm so phoebe

you are not so phoe. I think I'm Rachel. We're doing this. What? I think out of all of them, I'm definitely not Monica. I'm not Phoebe. I'm probably Ross because he's getting erotic. Yeah, you're Ross. Yeah.

I reckon so. Yeah. Plus he's got a crack and tan. Tans get well. Yeah, it does. Actually, I know I'm the duck. Who's the duck? The duck. Oh, the duck.

Oh, Miss Friends. Do you remember? This is a... Remember, Berries? Remember, Berries? Remember when we were actually of the age of watching it in real time? The last series. Guys, younger listeners here.

I watched She Got Off The Plane. I watched that live on Channel 4. When it happened, yeah. As it came out. And there was no social media you literally had to phone someone and go did you say it and then you had to wait yeah it wasn't that a cliffhanger i'm sure it was a cliffhanger no no well no i'm talking about when she got off the plane the final episode oh yeah sorry yeah yeah yeah i'm saying but it was a cliffhanger if you

didn't know whether she did or not i think so no it might have been a double episode i can't remember but i remember i was literally I was lying on the rug at my mum and dad's house watching it on the telly it was a Friday night and it was on oh I see I was with friends you were with actual friends

actual friends see Sheldon that is Sheldon thank you and that is it the end of another episode once again

thank you so so much for listening we are still loving doing this and we're still loving that you're listening getting to oh this is your bit

sorry it's alright oh god I'll quickly take the reins do you know the email address Rosie? I do now come on then

shagmarinoid at gmail.com yeah we'll go if you want to get in touch it's shagmarinoid at gmail.com she said it I've said it again

or Rosie's Instagram or you know if you walk past in the street just say hey how's it going and ask us a question oh yeah that's right

ask a question we'll not reply we'll just go thank you and we'll take it away take that knowledge away we'll just divulge it into their head

and then we'll walk off we're not being rude don't go in there and slag off we're just going to answer it on the podcast you know we might not you've just got to play

you've got to take that gamble that's it but we are loving doing it guys and thank you so much and obviously like, rate, and subscribe and all that stuff. And we'll see you next week.

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