Sh**ged Married Annoyed - Ep 39. The Zodiac DJ

Episode Date: November 8, 2019

It's episode 39 of Sh**ged Married Annoyed and the Ramsey's are back with some brilliant beef and some stories that cover being jilted at the alter, the Zodiac DJ, a bare chested massage and a wheelie bin. Plus it's a podcast first for Rosie's Mum Sandra who makes a cameo appearance! Become a member at https://plus.acast.com/s/sma. https://plus.acast.com/s/sma. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You're invited to an immersive listening party led by Rishi Keshe Herway, the visionary behind the groundbreaking Song Exploder podcast and Netflix series. This unmissable evening features Herway and Toronto Symphony Orchestra music director Gustavo Gimeno in conversation. Together, they dissect the mesmerizing layers of Stravinsky's The Rite of Spring, followed by a complete soul-stirring rendition of the famously unnerving piece, Symphony Exploder. April 5th at Roy Thompson Hall. For tickets, visit tso.ca. Will you rise with the sun to help change mental health care forever? Join the Sunrise Challenge to raise funds for CAMH, the Center for Addiction and Mental Health,

to support life-saving progress in mental health care. From May 27th to 31st, people across Canada will rise together and show those living with mental illness and addiction that they're not alone. Help CAMH build a future where no one is left behind. So, who will you rise for? Register today at sunrisechallenge.ca. That's sunrisechallenge.ca. Hello, you're listening to Shag Mary Noid with me, Rosie Ramsey, and my husband. dot ca It was bloody brilliant. Well done. I'll leave whenever now. I don't even care if I get kicked out. You've had your moment, haven't you? I've had it. I've had the moment. I've had, hey, guess what?

That wasn't, hey, all the judges went, hey, for once, Chris, that wasn't shit. Hey, hang on. These paddles do work. Oh, there's numbers bigger than five on these suckers. Oh, was that the highest you'd ever had? Five? No, I think I'd had a seven before or a six maybe, but I'd never had. A nine, two eights and another nine.

Lovely jubbly that like. Boozas woozas. Well done. Yes, yes. This is episode 39. 39. 39. Bitches.

Guys, honestly, thank you so much for listening still. We still can't believe it. We're sitting in the kitchen doing it. Do you know what, Rosie? Do you know what I was thinking just as we started this podcast? What were you thinking? How many other, and I'm not bragging here, but how many other of the top podcasters in the UK,

because let's be honest, we are, right? It's up there. Are we one of them? Easily, right? How many other of them start their podcast and sit down at the table and do what I've just done, which is have to take some cold broccoli off their foot that their toddler had just dropped previously

before we put them to bed? A little present. There's literally cold broccoli on me heel. Well. On my foot. And I've just scraped it off. Vitamin C?

From me heel. It'll go through the heel. It'll go through the heel. Absorbed through the heel. And it'll end up on your liver somehow. You're definitely not a doctor. So you're welcome.

Why is it going on me liver? Why is it going through me heel and end up on me liver? Doesn't broccoli, isn't it good for your liver? Good God, I don't know now. It's annoying because it's one of those

stupid things that you say because it's one of those stupid things that you say and then sometimes I'll get an annoying tweet going actually broccoli is the they call it the liver veg

in my house well I think it is yeah god I do remember weird things though we need that guy so Joe Rogan's got a guy where he goes

Jamie Jamie can you Jamie can you pull that up and Jamie just literally within seconds Jamie's checked whatever they're talking about on Google

I bet Jamie costs quite a lot of money he probably does actually hey if you're out there and you want to be a Jamie do you want to be do you want to be our Jamie

do you know the emails have gone up right from five or six thousand to eight and a half thousand wow I kind of get through them quick enough

wow I kind of get through them but you know what upsets us? What? It upsets me that I know inside them 8,000 emails is going to be some absolute gems. Oh, pearlers. And they're just waiting there.

Pearlers in there. Waiting for me to get to them. And I will get to them, but like for right now, I haven't got time. Why don't you try searching keywords? You said this, but I did that. And it was just rubbish. Really?

Yeah. Because I thought that search and keep me anonymous, the phrase keep me anonymous might get some juicy little emails. Chris, the one last week about the bloke with the wee in the mouth, he put his name on the bottom, man. How are you, man? Don't be ridiculous. There's no shame anymore.

The worst ones are the ones who keep the names on. Brilliant. Happy days. All right, then. Guys, it's episode 39. Obviously, thank you so much for listening now before we continue a word from this week's lucrative lucrative sponsor no money has passed our lips this week's sponsor is donuts hey hey do you want a cake but you don't want to have

to cut the cake do you want a cake that's perfect size in your hand? And have a little bite like it's an apple? Like a fruitcake, but there's no fruit in it. Donuts. I hate fruitcake. Hey, donuts were invented in ancient Rome when a sweet chocolate salted bun, Caesar put his penis through it and made a hole

and the donuts were invented. Is that a true story? Yes. Is it actually? No. But the donuts with stuff inside them were invented in ancient Rome when a Caesar put his willy in one but didn't go all the way through

and he ejaculated into the donut and the stuff was inside. Seriously? Was he on his period? I just had a donut a day and I was like, oh, fucking donuts are unreal, aren't they?

I do love a donut. They are unreal. How about we carry on with your lucrative sponsor? Yeah, that's it really. Is that it? I'll be honest with you,

I'm knackered off dancing. I've just put the bear into bed. I dozed off when I was putting him to bed. I'm back down here. I'm having a wine. The sponsor, i rosie i'm gonna be honest with you and this might come as a shock what none of these have been real sponsors you know i know no please don't fall out with us there's been actually no money from these there's none

of them are real sponsors this i'm just making them up. Is this some sort of sick joke? Is this... Honestly, you better take that big gold hat back that you bought. How tired are you? I'm so tired. I'm fucking delirious. See, everyone keeps going to me at the minute. They're like, is he loving it? He's loving it, isn't he?

And I'm like, he's loving it, but he and i'm like he's loving it but he's fucking shattered i'm so tired do you know if we're talking about this on the podcast me alone went off the other day and i just burst into tears i just started crying me alone went off and i just turned it off and then i just started crying well because i'm so tired no disrespect i mean strictly is very tiring and it's like full-on but you haven't had like a proper proper job for years i've never had to get up early this much now since you know and then also i've never done this much physical exercise in my entire life and it's mental and it's mental as well because you're you're what's it called mental exercise like yeah it's mentally strenuous because you're learning a new routine

oh heavens i am enjoying it it It's just, goodness me, when it comes to eight o'clock at night and you go, let's do a podcast, you're like, oh, fuck this. Excuse me. Don't you dare. Don't you dare be slacking on my job. Right? This is my job.

How terribly, how much of a failure are you that your job requires 50% of me as well? Are you fucking kidding me? Seriously, do you want to go there? Buy donuts. Here's the jingle. Hope that Roman's

willy's alright. Apparently got a lot of sugar in it. Spicy. Better than Skittles. We had a fight about the jingle. Jingle. We couldn't settle on a jingle. Jingle. So this is the jingle, jingle

We hope you like the jingle, jingle Babadoo babadoo babadoo ba Jingle! Hello, welcome back, here we are We've missed you so much since last week Just want to do a quick announcement to everyone who's asking for two podcasts a week No! Oh god no

Sorry, I'm no Oh, God, no. Sorry, I'm no. Oh, it's so, like, a hard no from both of us. But do you know what as well? We're so stubborn that we won't miss a week. Yeah. We're not getting paid at all, but we're just like, we will not miss a week. The amount of times, like, with everything that went, the amount of times we management go, our management go, do you not want to just skip a week?

Do you want to just have a week off? I'm like, I just, I refuse. Because if we drop out of our top 10 on iTunesunes or out of that top three on spotify i'll be in console that's the only reason you're doing it that's the only reason i'm doing it because i've never been top of anything before ever i have loads of times oh well good for you hope you enjoyed it nah not all the time what you been up to? Got my hair done today. Wow. And my hairdresser, love her to bits,

she put a picture on online of like before and after. Right. Just made us realise how disgusting my hair was. And just the fact that I nearly didn't get it done today. She put the picture on and I was like, holy shit. It looked awful. So you actually thought it was okay until you saw that?

Well, I thought I might be able to get away with this for a couple of more weeks. I knew it was bad. Robin was like, mummy, your hair's black. And me roots were horrific. He was actually saying that?

Oh, yeah. The other day, like a monkey. Bugger, innit? Oh, like a monkey came up to us and he was like, mummy, why's your hair black? I was like, oh, yeah.

And so I went, but I thought, oh, because we've been up to us and he was like, mammy, why is your hair black? I was like, oh, yeah. And so I went, but I thought, oh, because we've been so busy, but I went. And then she did the before after, so it was from behind. You couldn't see my face, but like she opened the pattern

and took a picture. It was shocking. And then she did the new one, which looked amazing. So I'm happy now, but obviously I was mortified. So you had your hair done today? Yes, I have had my hair done

when you're going back to get it finished boom year nine banter year nine banter that was year nine banter it's third year comp for anyone

who doesn't know third year comp I've been watching a lot of Real Housewives still oh god man why well there was a really heated debate the other day about public and private schools, which I found really interesting.

Jesus. One of them got upset because the other one asked what school her children go to. So she got upset. So that was fun. She got upset because she didn't know? She got upset because she asked. Why? Because I think our kids didn't go to private school.

Right. And she was, like, embarrassed about it. And I wanted to throw the telly off the wall. What a hard life they must have. But still love it. God, honestly. Other than strictly what you've been doing. I'm still watching Prison Break.

I'll be honest with you. It's fucking stupid. It's stupid. Like it's people just turn up at moments of like like someone's always about to die and someone you haven't seen for like three scenes turns up and saves them it i literally was watching the other day on the train and i loudly said this is fucking shit so would i not like it i don't know because i still like it oh nah it's stupid but i do really like it's that it's that sort of it's like a it's like it's like a

magazine rather than a book does that make sense it's like i don't know what it's sort of really accessible and i just stick it on and every i'm telling you there's a cliffhanger every fucking minute like it's just like and then it comes on again it's like and then like whenever this whenever something happens like they'll they'll i don't know like the cat the guy i look at the camera and he'll go like we yeah um something like i don't know, like, the guy will look at the camera and he'll go, like, something like, I don't know, for example, like, the tunnel's blocked. They've changed the pipe. There's no way out.

And then the camera sort of looks at his face and he'll kind of look just past the camera. And the music goes like, dun, dun, dun. And the camera, like, zooms into his face and then, like, goes through, like, an animation of, like, prison corridors. It's honestly, it's bollocks, but it's really good. Sounds awful. It's great. It's great. Yesterday,

no, Monday, sorry, I managed to get a day off. Karen didn't come up with a train, so I got a day off and I went with Robin and Uncle Carl, Carl Hutchinson, to the climbing wall

in the metro centre. And I haven't told you this, so I take Carl with us, obviously because Carl's Robin's godfather and he loves Robin and they play together great got to the climbing wall

you make him sound like a fucking five year old he is a fucking five year old got to the climbing wall didn't see him what do you mean? Carl was just up all the walls he'd come back sweating

and I was just with Robin on my own and Robin was like just playing on a few little things and I was taking him up and down some walls and normally I thought like when I go with you

you watch Robin for a bit and I can have a little climb I don't know why I put the harness on I don't know why I was taking them up and down some walls and normally I thought like when I go with you you watch Robin for a bit and I can have a little climb I don't know why I put the harness on I don't know why I bothered Carl like a big fucking daft Labrador

running up and down them right just flying up and down them he came back he was so sick he had sweat patches on his knees no

through cream chinos his knees were sweating hang on hang on he wore cream chinos to go to a climbing wall yeah I wore black chinos you wore chinos to go to a climbing wall yeah I wore black chinos he wore chinos

to go to a climbing wall right now you're looking at us like that Rosie you were there when I phoned him and told him not to wear his tracksuit pants because he dresses

like he dresses like he's just robbed a charity shop I literally had to whatever I go anywhere with Carl Hutchinson it happened a few years ago

on tour when we were on tour I had to say to him look here we're going to service stations we're going to sort of on tour. When we're on tour, I had to say to him, look, we're going to service stations, we're going to sort of restaurants and stuff while we're on tour. You can't just wear massive, big, ripped,

disgusting tracksuit pants with stains all over them. Literally, it looks like he's took them off a dead body. Well, because I've seen Carl, I don't know if we've ever mentioned this. I've seen Carl. I know exactly what you're going to say. I've seen Carl in tracksuit pants, a T-shirt and then a dressed

cord yeah and carrying his wallet in a carry on pants yeah yeah

I have yeah he's honestly he's the worst dressed man I've ever met I know exactly so he used to have

one of them paddock and bear cords didn't he yeah like a beige one with the little toggles on the front things yeah so he had a paddock

and bear cord with a t-shirt monkey tracksuit pants I'm sure he had dress shoes on that day as well you know probably because he looked I remember thinking

you look horrendous and he had a carrier bag in a carrier bag with his wallet and his phone in yeah he was just going out to shout at buses yeah

yeah well Michael Pratt another friend of ours he back in the day whenever he used to pop out in the car when he first passed his test I remember I went 24 hour asda with him in Balden ours he back in the day whenever he used to pop out in the car when he first passed his test

I remember I went 24 hour Asda with him in Balden and he went in a t-shirt football shorts and dress shoes and socks

who did make the brand dress shoes like brogues like pointy but pointy shoes sort of oxfords but with brogan do you know what I mean

like yeah with socks and football shirts football shorts and just a fucking t-shirt or a hoodie. And I was like, why have you got dress shoes on?

He was like, oh, I just hide them on. I am not that person. You're not a hire owner, are you? Absolutely not. If I hide some shoes on and they happen to be the same colour as the t-shirt I'm wearing,

I think, oh, I look like I've tried to fucking match myself up like a fruit pastel lolly and I'll go and change them. See, I'm a hire owner. Yeah. I just hire anything on. Yeah. I get a bit annoyed when I drop Robin off at them. See, I'm a hire runner. Yeah. I'll just hire anything on. Yeah.

I get a bit annoyed when I drop Robin off at nursery. Not annoyed, that's the wrong word, but like, there's people who obviously have real jobs and they're ready to go

to the real job and then I rock up with like a cap and a disgusting coat on and I haven't like, I've just barely brushed my teeth and I'm like, morning,

it's morning. Covering my mouth like, alright. So many times when I'm dropping Robin off at nursery I just breathe through my nose. I know, it's shocking covering my mouth like alright so many times when I've dropped my hair off at nursery I just breathe through my nose

I know it's shocking I stand in that room breathing through my nose thinking I'm literally going to go back home and do all of the getting ready after this

I had to wear gloves the other day because I'd done my tan and I hadn't washed it off so I just looked shocking so I had to wear a pair of gloves

like you've been baking a cake couldn't get the Benz jacket off oh that is shocking I know cheers oh cheers

yes it's a wine cast again today wine cast guys wine cast we'll probably fall asleep honestly plonky plonky we did that thing

didn't we on Sunday we were like not drinking until Friday oh I know although is it weird did that thing, didn't we? On Sunday, we're like, not drinking until Friday. Oh, I know. Although, is it weird? I didn't until now.

That's quite good for me. Right, so you didn't drink. So on Sunday, you said you weren't drinking until Friday, but now you're drinking on Wednesday. So that's one, two, three. That's three and a bit days. That's good for me. That's not too bad. That is good for me.

Not too bad. What's the longest you've ever gone? What's the longest you've ever gone? What's the longest you've ever gone? About 16 years. Touché. Cheers. Very good.

Thank you. It's time for What's Your Beef? What's Your Beef? What's Your Beef? Tell us your beef. Tell us your beef or I'll rob you.

You know, we've got a jingle but we probably don't need to play it because you've just done that one you know what it is I'm going to make a call

we're not playing the jingle because you just made that one and it was it was frightening thank you it was intimidating thank you well done

quick little story before the beef because obviously it's our podcast of course I went to school with a guy who got mugged

but they didn't realise he was hard and he mugged them back shut up man oh yeah yeah he got mugged in the back lane is this the guy who knocked the guy out

then took him to hospital probably the same one I think yeah I heard about that yeah two guys tried to rob that's hilarious

two guys tried to rob him he braided them both he hurt one of them so badly he actually took him to the hospital. Well, play with fire. There you go. I love a dark horse.

Did I never tell you about my Chava mate, who did the coolest Chava thing I've ever seen in my life? No. So what outside the Chinese takeaway at the nuke? Ocean Pearl, big up Brian. Oh, Brian. South Shields at the nuke. Love you.

So for people who are not from South Shields, there's an area called the nuke. It's just some shops, really, and there's a very famous chinese takeaway there with a just because the guy who works behind the counter

has such good crack and he'll entertain you while you're waiting for your food he's a lovely bloke anyway we were

outside there years ago i must have been 14 and your mate was like 16 and uh we're standing and he was

having um i think he was just having like noodles and whatever it was in a silver rice chips and curry sauce

probably rice chips and curry sauce in a silver tray and he's standing eating it and this lad came up this ch a silver tray and he's standing eating it. And this lad came up, this chav came up and he was just like,

I mean, we're all little. We all wore tracksuit pants so we could all be sort of the old school chava. And this lad came up and he was like, yeah, give us a cigarette. And my mate was like, no.

He was like, give us a cigarette now and he started kicking off. My mate put the chips and curry sauce, it's the coolest thing I've ever seen in my life. He put the chips and curry sauce. I mean, I'll be the judge of that. We'll see. He put the chips and curry sauce on it's the coolest thing I've ever seen in my life. He put the chips and curry sauce. I mean, I'll be the judge of that. We'll see.

He put the chips and curry sauce on top of the bin, right? Rank. He hit this lad, knocked him out in one punch. The lad was lying on the deck. He opened his packet of cigarettes. He put a cigarette on the lad's chest, picked up his chips and curry sauce and walked off.

No way. It was amazing. Now, I'm not condoning violence here and obviously don't go punching people in the street because their head can hit the floor and that can be it but I didn't know that at the time I was 14 and holy shit it was the coolest thing I imagined a sunset would appear

for him to walk into it was the coolest, he left the cigarette on his chest unbelievable I don't know what to think about that it's violent and disgraceful but at the time I was like I'll have your kids marry us I don't think I'd have found that attractive

well I wasn't finding it attractive I just thought it was really cool do you know what I mean because hey people used to always ask us for money and stuff but when I was with him it was never a problem it was great

I need to find out who that is it's like going out with your dad don't forget to tell us who that is I will do beef beef beef beef beef beef what a beef what a beef what a beef beef beef going out with your dad. Don't forget to tell us who that is. I will do. Beef? Beef bononion? Beef, beef, beef.

What's your beef? What's your beef? What's your beef? Beef, beef, beef. What's your beef? What's your beef? Do you want to go first or me? So my beef with you this week. Oh, okay.

You go first then. I'm going to go first. My beef with you this week. And it's not something that annoys us. It's not something that particularly affects me in any way.

You're not really understanding the concept of what's your beef. Okay, it's slightly irritating and a little bit disgusting. But i didn't realize that it was weird until you pointed it out this week right so you you pointed out one of your instagram stories and i was like yes that is really weird and it does annoy us you rosie ramsey when you drink out of a bottle oh no yeah when you drink over bottle you do this weird thing with your tongue, where your tongue kind of comes out of your mouth and creates...

A little. Like a little bridge for the liquid to go over your tongue. Rather than just putting the bottle on your lips and not having to do that, you stretch your tongue out of your mouth and into the bottle, making like a causeway. So why does that annoy you? Just from the side, it looks like you're mouth and into the bottle and make it like a causeway so why does that annoy you it just from the side it looks like you're necking on the bottle it looks like you're like kissing the bottle or like trying to lick something out of the room there is an explanation for this

yeah but can i just say you put it on your instagram you realized you've done it you put it on you're on the train to london you put it instagram and you're like why do i do this with me and i've noticed it for years and it is really fucking weird it's really really creepy it's to it's to protect my lipstick okay but i didn't notice i was doing it i've done it subconsciously that makes that's how much i care about my lipstick that makes sense but is that the same so i put the instagram video on because i flew to london last week to watch strictly i flew i downed a bottle of ribena that i bought at craigs and then I went through I went through the security and got stopped and got me bag open

because I'd left all me liquids in me case so he took me hairspray me dry shampoo me deodorant and everything and I downed

a bottle of Ribena no I had to leave them there so you downed a bottle of Ribena a bottle of hairspray dry shampoo how did you get that down Chris I had to spend 20 quid in boots

because of that that's how they get you I know that's how they get you I was livid I was like I've just downed a bottle of hairspray dry shampoo how do we get that going I spent 20 quid in boots because of that that's how they get you I know that's how they get you I was livid I was like I've just downed a bottle of Ribena anyway

I know stupid stupid I totally forgot oh my god I just forgot I can't I can't travel

with just hand luggage I have too many little portions and liquids it's really hard for a boy I carry a lot of portions liquids and mixtures I told you,

I'm a... Are you... Hang on. What? Harry? Harry? What? Harry?

Harry what? Harry Potter. Harry Potter. Thank you. I do. I carry a wand, potions, mixtures. A little...

Oh, I'd bloody love a broomstick to fly around on. Oh, tell us about it. Although it would mess your hair up. I've often thought about this. Thinking flying wouldn't be a good one.

Being able to fly as a superpower or on a wouldn't be a good one. Being able to fly as a superpower or on a broom would be a good one. But it would be fun but it would be very impractical because you couldn't fly to your mate's house

if it was pissing down my rain. Well you could but you'd just be a bit wet. Yeah. Like at gigs is the only one I would have teleporting because I would just

teleport to gigs. Would you rather be able to teleport or have Bernard's Watch? Bernard's Watch for any of our listeners overseas bernard's watch was a program when we were younger but a little boy had a special watch and he could stop time and do stuff and then just start so everyone would just like stand still and then he pressed

the watch again and then it was like as if he was the only one who could walk in that while it was happening god i loved bernard's watch it really i fantasized my whole life about having a watch but i think i'd still probably rather teleport because again i just put work into it i just although then but no because if you have bernard's watch you could stop time have a little sleep start time again or travel while everyone's stopped what walk to fucking portsmouth if you i mean if you want the exercise did you ever see the one where he paused time and then he went to have a drink of milk and the milk wouldn't come out of the bottle

so he put the straw in I didn't I can't I can't say I remember the certain episode but he just did

shit stuff with it he had a watch that stopped time the stupid prick just went home and got his pd kit that he'd forgotten

crap like that oh yeah it was shit it was shit I mean I was robbing sweetchops in my imagination I was like

why is he not robbing why is he not on the rob why is he not on the rob what do they call it when when people go mental and just steal stuff from shops uh a crime spree no no what's it called it's got a certain name it's not glamping it's not glamping it sounds like glamping what is it man fuck me do you mean like like em what's it called they did it in London

a few years ago why can't I think of it man when it just like ram raiding like em it just went crazy for like two hours riots

no it's got a name Chris what's the name oh my god what's the name people are screaming it stop talking people are screaming it it's like glamping

but not glamping it's not glamping what the fuck's glamping oh shit what's it called what's glamping why can't I think of the word I'm gonna have to google it right no no no no I'm gonna to have to Google it, right.

No, no, no. No, I'm going to get it. Don't you dare Google it. You're not. Well, then I'll get it. How would I describe this on Google? Fuck me. This is glamping.

Jamie, get this up with you. Oh, shit. We need a Jamie. Jamie wouldn't know what's going on. Hang on. Oh, shops being stolen. Jesus. What?

I'm going to leave this in. Shops being stolen from. No, shops being raided by mobs. Not like glamping, but not... Do you mean it sounds like glamping or it's something like glamping? I'm going to ask my mam. You're going to ask your mam? Just dead quick.

Looting. Is it? Looting. Hello? Hi, mam. You okay? Yes, how are you? Yeah, just dead quick. Looting. Is it? Looting. Hello? Hi, ma'am. You okay? Yes, how are you? Yeah, just dead quickly.

Do you know, a few years ago in London, when people were stealing from the shops and it was like the whole street of shops and everyone was just going crazy, what's that called? Oh, looting. Looting, right. Okay, yes, yeah.

Okay, L-O-O-T-I-N-G. Yes. Okay, all right. Love you. Okay all right love you okay bye what's your favorite podcast ma'am what's your favorite podcast um good good good answer i love you bye um how did she not question what you were doing there? I don't know. Isn't that weird? It's weird. Luton, love you, bye. Love you, bye. Do you know how many times I ring my mum? God damn it. That is a woman who has been worn down by a daughter who can't use Google. Sandra is my Google.

Yeah, so Luton. Why were we talking about it? You said if you had Bernard's watch, that's why. Oh, I'd have gone Luton. Fuck me. Well, that used up a bit of time. Jesus. We'll just do a dead quick podcast tonight, Chris,

because you're knackered, she said. Fuck me. So sorry. Right, what's your beef? My beef this week is... This has been happening since the day we met. Oh, Jesus. You insist on going to bed

With no clothes on And then every night Complaining that you're too cold Every night I'm freezing Have you got any clothes on? No I find them restricting

Why? What clothes? Because I find them restricting Yeah I don't like them I find them restricting I find that when I turn over in the night them restricting. Yeah, I don't like them. I find them restricting. I find that when I turn over in the night, stuff gets tightened around stuff and I don't like it.

What stuff? Sometimes stuff gets, obviously, no, no, get your head out of the gutter. I'm not talking about like tiddlers and bums and that. I was talking about your toes. I'm talking about like, sometimes like under your t-shirt will get like tight under your armpit or sometimes it gets tight around your neck

and that's dangerous, right? Or sometimes like the line of your thigh where you hit where you sort of your thigh meets your body sometimes if you turn like your pants or your underpants i'll get like tight on that and pull and i just i feel like i'm being i just feel like i'm being strangled yeah like strangling different parts of my body yeah yeah but can you understand i've been oppressed can you understand how upsetting that is to somebody who shares a bed with you You sleep full of fucking clothes It's craziness

You sleep in like long pants, socks Last night I saw you getting into bed You tucked your pyjama pants into your socks Like you were going on your fucking bike Saw that Don't think I didn't see that I spotted you Sexy

Everything about me so sexy when did you notice the magic had gone from your marriage when me wife climbed into bed with three layers

of clothes on and just in case I saw a bit of skin tucked her pants into her socks why do you think I've got you watching Downton Abbey

I'm trying to take a peck now y'all no I get really cold in bed but you know what Iall no I get really cold in bed but you know what I know that I get cold so I put more layers on then in the middle of the night

I take them off and then sometimes what happens which is annoying around about four or five I get cold again so I have to put them back on it's fucking horrible that

like that's so irritating I'm irritated by that is that all the movement is that what you're doing getting up and putting clothes back on taking clothes off probably yeah

it's a bloody fashion show bloody midnight fashion show. Bloody midnight fashion show. But are you not uncomfortable being cold? No, because I warm up quickly. I'm a sweater. I sweated so much the other night, I thought, honestly,

I thought I'd wet the bed. We had to turn the duvet around, didn't we? I sweated that much. Oh, God. Are you telling everyone that? That was awful. Yeah. Can you imagine me waking you up in the middle of the night going,

Chris, Chris, can we turn the duvet over? I've sweated so much. You'd be like... Honestly, it was horrible. I felt like that guy in X-Men, in the first X-Men where they inject him with the thing and he turns into a big puddle on the bed and just falls on the floor.

I felt like him. and he turns into a big puddle on the bed and just falls on the floor. I like him. It was just like, whoosh, just Mr. Water. It was so fucking horrible. Mr. Good Grouch. The worst bit was, I was like, Rosie, can we turn the duvet over?

And you were like, well, don't turn it onto me, because I obviously... Well, because I thought you meant, do you just want me to sweat on you? No, I won't. You've got three layers on, you'll be fine. That's what I did at first. I fucking like, I got my bit and I just wanted to basically fold my bit onto you and then

pull your bit onto me and roll it over. And then you were like, fold it top to bottom. So I had to like fold the top down and pull the bottom bit up. This is so grim. Honestly, it was crazy. Crazy sweat monster. Do you think? Sweat monster. grim honestly it was crazy crazy sweat mount do you think monster i love to think of like

famous attractive people yeah who who do you think who do you who would you hate to think wakes up in the middle of the night and goes to the partner hey hey we need to turn the do-over over i've sweated so much who can you think who would be my worst celebrity if i heard that that happened to them and i was just like gutted because i thought they were perfect yeah probably like helen mirren or someone oh you can't be having helen mirren sweating everywhere like patrick stewart like the idea of patrick stewart like just like these perfect incredible like nights nights of the realm just going yeah turn the two duvet over I'm I'm

I'm fucking lathered I'm literally I'm sudden sudden oh god what do you think Ryan Reynolds

I would be upset if it happened to Ryan Reynolds oh no I think he looks a bit sweaty but nice sweaty like tasty sweat oh what you'd have his side

of the duvet would you yeah unbelievable unbelievable he's what you bought you'd fucking you'd have his side of the duvet would you yeah yeah it's unbelievable unbelievable rock city you're the best fans in the league bar none tickets are on sale now for fan appreciation night on saturday april 13th when the toronto rock hosts the rochester nighthawks at first ontario center in hamilton at 7 30 p.. You can also lock in your playoff pack right now to guarantee the same seats for every postseason game,

and you'll only pay as we play. Come along for the ride and punch your ticket to Rock City at torontorock.com. This Friday... You must be very careful, Margaret. It's a girl. Witness the birth... Bad things will start to happen.

Evil things. Of evil. It's all.... Witness the birth. Bad things will start to happen. Evil things. Of evil. It's all. No, no, don't. The First Omen. I believe the girl is to be the mother. Mother of what? Is the most terrifying.

Six, six, six. It's the mark of the devil. Movie of the year. It's not real. It's not real. It's not real. Who said that? The First Omen. In theaters Friday.

Get tickets now. Will you rise with the It's not real. Who said that? The First Omen. In theaters Friday. Get tickets now. Will you rise with the sun to help change mental health care forever? Join the Sunrise Challenge to raise funds for CAMH, the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, to support life-saving progress in mental health care. From May 27th to 31st, people across Canada will rise together and show those living with mental illness and addiction that they're not alone. Help CAMH build a future where no one is left behind.

So, who will you rise for? Register today at sunrisechallenge.ca. That's sunrisechallenge.ca. It's time for questions from the public. Questions from the public. Public. Public. Public.

As always, you beauties email shagmoudanoid at gmail.com send us your questions your thoughts your dreams your hopes your office polls

or you could do what some people did which is on Saturday night after Strictly Rosie was in the VIP tent bit that you go to afterwards and Rosie said

a collection of ladies had came up to her and told her one of the best stories that she'd heard for the podcast um i said amazing what is it rosie said i'm not going to tell you i'll tell you on the podcast so much so i've been looking forward to this because i went to the bar later on and the three ladies in question came up for a photo rosie spilled a drink on herself yes came up for a photo Rosie spilled a drink on herself yes or no yes or no

you spilled a drink on yourself while frantically running across the room shouting don't tell him I'm gonna tell him on the podcast

so this has been built up so I'm buzzing for this that was nice because that was the first time I met Kevin Clifton as well yeah and he just saw

spill a drink on us and probably thought what a fucking clown if anyone's heard this they know you're a clip exactly so yeah so met these three

lovely girls I can't for the life of us remember the names I'm so sorry I think one was called Bay or Bow like Beatrice

I can't remember anyway they were absolutely lovely lovely lovely girls they stopped us outside the toilet and they were like we love the podcast

I was like that's amazing thank you so much we've got an amazing story for you and I was like oh okay thinking when someone. We've got an amazing story for you. And I was like, oh, okay. When someone says they've got an amazing story, it's normally a shit story. Well, I did.

I kind of thought, this might be funny and it might be not funny, but I was like, I'll hear you out. So one of them told me that she used to work with a lady who went to a wedding, a broad wedding. Okay. It was in Portugal. Morning of the wedding, it got called off.

They were all in Portugal. And the wedding got called off. And it got called off. Wow. Okay. The reason it got called off is the bride went into the honeymoon suite because she'd forgotten something. She went in there and the groom was with his mother. Can you guess what was happening?

No. Can you guess? I'm scared to. So the bride went into the honeymoon suite. The bride walked into the honeymoon suite. The night before the wedding. No, the morning of the wedding. The morning of the wedding.

She walked into the honeymoon suite because she forgot something. She saw her husband-to-be and his mother in there doing something. But can you guess? I can't guess. Shall I tell you? I don't know if I want to know the bride walked in found her husband-to-be

love of her life sucking on his mother's tits shut the fuck up no way apparently so no one last

bitty do you want to hear what else there's more not more he was in his suit

why is that worse why is it worse why is it worse that he's in his suit

he was in his suit and then apparently why is it worse because I went I wanted to get a bit deeper I was like why what did he say I don't know. Why is it worse that he's in the suit? He was in his suit. Why is it worse? Because I went a bit deeper. I was like, what did he say?

Apparently he said he does it when he's nervous. Fucking hell, man. Are you disgusted or shocked or amused? I am. I feel sorry for them both. Why? The mom and him. The fact that they think that that's okay. Why? Do not feel sympathy for them both. Why? The mom and him. The fact that they think that that's okay.

Why? Do not feel sympathy for them. Why is she letting him for one? Why is he wanting to? There's not going to be no milk in them anymore. Unless, unless... Rosie, Rosie, Rosie, I have seen you chew on a straw

after you've finished a carton of Ribena. So don't you be giving it about that there's no milk in there anymore. What do you mean? You know, he's just after the sensation. He's after the chew. Oh, for God's sake, that's disgusting. No, unless there might be milk

if he's done it consistently the whole time. That is mental. Because you keep lactating. That is, I can't get my head around it. Isn't it lovely? I don't feel sorry for them, actually. I think I'm angry at them now. I think I'm going through the seven stages of grief.

I had to be, had to walk don't feel sorry for them, actually. I think I'm angry at them now. I think I'm going through the seven stages of grief. His poor bride-to-be had to walk in and see Fucking hell, man. a husband-to-be sucking on his mum's boob. That is... Oh, my God.

I've gone all light-headed. It's horrible, isn't it? That's incredible. Are you glad I kept it? I am glad you kept it, yeah. I am glad you kept it. But I've been... Honestly,

it's been rattling around my head knowing what that was. I've been so nervous I was sucking my man's tit earlier on. Shut up. Okay. I ended up reading loads of messages about one night stands. Wow. So there's a few here.

Do you want to hear them? Yeah. Just a lot. They all seem to just be about one night stands. Okay.'s a few here do you want to hear them yeah just a lot of just all seem to just be about one night stands okay and i was like this is me have we talked about one night stands on here i don't know if we have i mean we might have skirted over it i'm not sure anyway so here you go uh it's a bit about poo as well obviously obviously i mean i don't want to you know put people off by not talking about poo for one week yeah it's got to be done people will leave yeah i get it's got to be done.

Dear Rosie and Chris, after hearing the story of the girl the other week whose new boyfriend shit all over the doormat, oh, lovely. Really glad you enjoyed that. Great, great bit of banter.

I love that. Sorry, I just said the thing I love about this podcast and its listeners so much is that the listener will hear a horrific story about someone shitting and they go,

that reminds me, I must get in touch with them for the correspondence relating directly to that tale. I've got a great story relating to this. Okay, so I wanted to share a shagging and shitting story that made me question humanity. Happy days.

Buckle up, buckle up for a tale of sex, lies lies and shit i've got one for you after this i've just remembered one someone told me see see it sparks it sparks the imagination of millions yeah um so i started dating my boyfriend a year ago and a few weeks later when i was about to meet his friends for the first time he sat me down and said he needed to tell me something because he didn't want his friends breaking it to me i was terrified oh god i sat stock still whilst he told me the following when he was younger he dj'd in the local club the zodiac why do they name these clubs so shit?

Oh god The Zodiac I don't know why It just sounds so shit Horrible Okay so he DJ'd in the local club The Zodiac He often took one lady or another home with him

At the end of the evening One night he met a girl and took her home via the kebab shop. Classy. They were both leather drunk. They banged and passed out. Banged means sexual activity for those of us of a higher caliber. Of course. Intercourse.

Intercourse. Sexual intercourse. Or as we like to call it on this podcast, booking. Booking. Yeah. Lying back to back, sorry, they booked, passed out,

lying back to back against each other. Later, he woke himself up with what he thought was a fart. But what in fact turned out to be the kebab reincarnated and coming out of the other end of it as an almighty flourish of shit. Oh no.

Being as they were, lying back to back, gravity and ground force did its work and the shit was all over his one night stand. Oh no. He led there for a bit, horrified and wondering what his next move should be when fate took control. At that moment, she farted and woke herself up. Shut the fuck up! I swear to God.

No way. Feeling the wet, warm shit all over her, she immediately jumped to the conclusion that it was hers and that she had shit herself. Fantastic. Hey, this is the luckiest man in the world. Well, singing a get out of the shitty bed free chord, my boyfriend went along with her theory, jumping out of bed in an act of shock and disgust. What a man. Heavens above.

He's going to hell for this. He is going to hell the poor girl then proceeded to shower him down strip the bed apologize profusely and leave in what could only have been the most degrading walk of shame of her life she showered him down so he fucking stood in the bath Arms open It's alright I just imagine him standing there Arms wide like the angel of the north

Just rotating You got it all off Get the inside of me ankle as well Hey I tell you what You're never coming back here After I played them songs you wanted us to play earlier on as well Four times I played out your monkeys for you You slag

You've shot out shot out hours is that the thanks again and you used me free drinks coupon for the night shocking so she's showered him down

oh Jesus he never saw her again which is probably for the best however she probably fucking emigrated the poor lot well she's

the girl who's wrote this put devastatingly that means that to this dayrated the poor girl well she's the girl who's wrote this but devastatingly that means that to this day this poor girl thinks that she sharted all over the DJ from Zodiac

on a one night stand Rosie she might be listening well I hope yeah well this is why this is Gemma who's wrote this in

and she's basically hoping that she's listening and she can stop seeing the therapist can I just back in the day she's basically hoping that she's listening and she can stop seeing the therapist. Can't you see? Back in the day of radio shows, TV shows, there's like amazing stories of like,

you know, me long lost brother or whatever. I hope that, hey, you know, during the war, we got sent to one place and me brother got sent somewhere else and we never saw each other again. You know, I hope they're listening. Ours is. If you're listening, in the probably early 2000s, if you're the person

who thinks that you sharted all over the DJ from Zodiac, you didn't. He was lying. It was his shit off the mic he came out of his head. Thanks for listening.

Should we put out like a thing on Twitter or something? Like, do you know what? You know what? I'm strictly this weekend. Find the Zodiac Shorter.

Can you, when you go at the judges table, 10 million people are watching and you just say, guys, who thought, who is it out there who thinks the shit over the Zodiac? Imagine that. I've finished me dance.

Test scores coming up. Craig, what do you think of that? Two seconds, Craig. Anyone watching, if you think you're sharted on the Zodiac DJ, the DJ from Zodiac in the early 2000s, late 90s, it wasn't you. It was his shart.

It was his shart. Sorry, Craig. What were you about to say about me tango? Someone told me a story the other day about a one night stand. Okay. And I haven't told you this. I don't want to say his name,

but it's a mate of mine who I was talking to recently. Do I know him? Yeah. And he said he was, he had a girl come round his house and stay one night. I don't know if it was Tinder.

They definitely hadn't met on a night out. It was like Tinder. I think she came round and they had maybe a takeaway or something and watched some telly or whatever and she stayed. Right. Netflix and chill kind of crap.

Okay, yeah, yeah. And he said he woke up at about three in the morning. She was gone. He'd heard her go to the bathroom and he hadn't heard her come out of it. Mm-hmm. Right. He looked to see where she was.

She wasn't anywhere to be seen. She'd left the flat and he went into the bathroom and he opened the toilet lid and there was just a massive't anywhere to be seen. She'd left the flat. And he went into the bathroom. And he opened the toilet lid. And there was just a massive turd in the toilet. Oh, no. And he said, is toilets really hard to flush?

Oh, no. So instead of shouting through, how do you flush your toilet? She had a shit in the middle of the night. Realised she couldn't flush it. Got all her clothes on and ran away. That's what I would have done. Was it me? Considering it was a couple of months ago all right okay that's a story in my life that is i've never done that before but it's something that i've i've had a whole poos in yeah at the beginning bits yeah isn't there

the story that i don't know whether it was like an old wives' tale or like a full-on story, of when somebody had a poo and they'd been left, it was a girl had a poo, but the guy who she had a one-night stand with had gone to work and he was like, just let yourself out when you're ready, blah-de-blah. The chain wouldn't flush, so they had to put it in a carrier bag. But then they forgot about it and left, shut the door behind them, and they'd left the poo in a carrier bag on the table. Oh, no. That's a true story.

I think it's like an urban myth thing. That's very good. But, yeah, that would happen to me. That would totally happen to me. Yeah, that would definitely happen to me. Got another one-night stand here. Hi, Rosie and Chris. So I've been talking to this guy for a little while i knew him from school but we hadn't seen each other um in years as now he works away the messages were getting very straight at the point if you know what i mean which suited me

fine saucy well listen suit i find because i'm really busy and i find dating and beating around the bush quite tedious oh fair enough so yeah why not independent lady i decided it would be worth a meet up when he was next home to see if he lived up to the hype looking back that was my first mistake nothing ever lives up to the hype no but i digress we hadn't spoke for a while when he randomly popped me a message asking if i was busy as he was at home i wasn't't busy, so I invited him over for a nightcap. Now, I won't go into full detail, but let's just say where some light choking can be quite sexy, being turned blue is not and I wasn't a fan.

What is wrong with everyone? I don't know. So, she didn't really like it. Afterwards, I didn't want him to stay the night. I made up an excuse about why he couldn't stay but as it was now early hours on a weekday there were no taxis he said he would walk home as it's not that far but me being a nice person and a bit of a worrier i said i would drive him it was late and dark and he might get hit by a car wow i take him to where

he has to be dropped off. So he got out of the passenger side, waved goodbye and disappeared to the left. Or so I thought. As I pulled off to the right, looking into the road, I heard a loud bang. Shut up.

Looked up to see this man across the bonnet of my truck. I had only gone and hit him with my car. Fucking hell. After driving him home of fear that he would get hit on the way. We shouldn't laugh. He lived to see another day bar some bruising and it's quite funny but at the time I was mortified.

Good God. I guess it's not really a sex injury but I wouldn't have been dropping him home if he hadn't nearly killed me during the act so there you go she ran over a one night stand

I think she did it on purpose do you think yeah I think subconsciously she was like get out of here he's strangling me no I wouldn't do it I'm sorry

who tries strangling and stuff like that on a one night stand we've been over this before I don't know what's wrong with it. Porn! Why is everyone so confident sexually? Why is everyone like,

oh, yeah, it's a one-night stand. Oh, yeah, you'll be up for just pissing in me mouth. Oh, you'll be up for just getting strangled. Listen, the rule should be beige. Just whatever they say. Mish. Yeah, just do it. Number of positions if you want.

Move a couple of times. You're probably going to be drunk you can keep going for a bit longer do what they ask you to do don't randomly start that's how people get killed yeah it's not nice

don't randomly start strangling someone at night what the hell's wrong with you I know and sometimes the nicest thing about one night stands is that they might turn into something else

we had a one night stand now we're married we did do you know what I mean but it was lovely beige as you like we can't call it a one night stand and now we're married we did do you know what I mean but it was lovely beige as you like we can't call it a one night stand

because we're now married but it was a one night stand but it wasn't because we're married now yes I know but

we didn't like we knew each other but we didn't really but now but it was alright okay fair enough one night stand is when you don't say something again

you can't go you know I only had that one crisp out of that multi pack of crisps that I ate all in one go do you know what I mean no that was a terrible terrible analogy

take it back hello Chris and Rosie I'm writing to tell you my story it's around 12 years later it still makes me piss myself laughing and shake with fear. Wow. I travelled to Glasgow for a night out with two of my chums. We had a fair amount of drink at a party when we went to a nightclub. By this point in the night, my feet were starting to hurt. So as my two friends ordered drinks at the bar, I spotted some benches and walked over to take a seat these benches were quite high up so i turned round put both hands behind me and pushed myself up to sit down the same action as pushing pushing

yourself up to sit on a kitchen counter yeah alas these were not benches and i absolutely shit myself in a flash i had fallen bum first into a wheelie bin. Get in. My feet and hands were up above me. I folded in half like a slice of bread. Brilliant. And just my heels and fingers were peeking out over the top. Fantastic.

At first, I pissed myself laughing, but then it became harder to breathe. I love that. You know, the fact that I fucking laugh was echoing in that bin. The club was dark and nobody had come to get me out. Panic set in

and I started to shout help but the music was too... The music was too loud. Poor Jesus. My friends, meanwhile, were wandering around presuming that I had fucked off to the toilet or something. Eventually, by pure chance, my friend noticed my feet at the top of the bin.

By this point, I am crying in terror. Oh, Jesus Christ. They find the sight of me hilarious and stand there laughing, falling over and trying not to pee. When they manage to stop and see that I'm struggling to breathe, they tip over the bin, but my large bum had created a vacuum and I was proper stuck. It took both girls pulling on my arms and legs

to eventually get me up along with a pile of rubbish. And that's from Nicola in Aberdeenshire. Nicola, that was amazing, darling. Just to add to this little story, right, this is what really... I'm sorry. Just put P.S.

You spoke of massages on your last podcast. Right. Oh, God, are we? At my hen do, my friend went for a facial but thought it was a massage so got fully undressed and sat on the chair with her tits out. Oh, God. so got fully undressed and sat on the chair with her tits out. That's like taking your kit off for the barbers.

Listen, the lady simply came in, placed a towel over her tits and did the facial. Rosie, I think you'd get on with her. I loved so much when I read that. I swear to God. That's absolutely fantastic. She sat there for a facial with her tits out.

That's fantastic wow oh wow I love her that's a great email absolutely love her brilliant wow

it's time for this week's celebrity question celebrity question exactly and this week it is the marvellous Sally Lindsay hi Chris and Rosie

It's Sally Lindsay here Now my question is What do you feel about Sleeping in separate bedrooms? Oh Interesting question Relevant for us at the minute Because I'm spending a bit of time

In the old spare room aren't I? Well I know Because Robin keeps coming in And you're sweating And Robin's got a cough at the minute And he just coughs On you On you In your face Into your mouth yeah it's disgusting and I was like look you can't you

haven't got time to be ill because I've employed don't get days off go in the spare room yeah um do you know what it's weird isn't it because I always thought you know when you see people in separate beds and you're like what's going on on? Something bad in the marriage? Maybe it's just sensible. Yeah. I mean, who is to say you need to sleep together in the same bed? It is weird.

We've often thought that it's weird that we go upstairs to our bed together and Robin goes into a different room. I know. Yeah. I don't really like it. I'd quite like it to be like olden days

where everyone's just in the same room together. Do you know what I mean? Or like, goodnight, Bella Jo. Night not rosanne but um i don't know it's it's that thing of i think when you're younger or before you're married you think that every night people who are married go to bed and have sex yeah they don't and it's like no that's that's like the least time we have sex because when I go to bed I just want to go to bed

yeah 100% so who's having sex when they go to bed then people are I think some people do I think I don't know maybe

I mean not our listeners because they're all in bathrooms pissing each other's mouths and all kinds of disgusting shit but do you think married couples so they have the day go to work

have tea relax have a drink or whatever go up to bed wash their faces and then have sex for like half an hour half an hour

well I don't know I don't know well that's what they do on the films double shift that's what they do on the films

and then the lady puts on the man's shirt and you know they wake up and it's sunshine and they've got toast on trays

well they happen to get up in the middle of the night and go and do stuff downstairs and talk and that and then they get up in the morning and they're absolutely not knackered and fucking fuming with each other.

Yeah, someone's always making a hot milk on the pan and you're like, what? In the middle of the night, yeah. No. Ugh. When am I going to wake up and not feel just gutted at the world? Probably when you die.

Wow. I can't, genuinely, I can't... Genuinely, I can't remember the last time I woke up and was like, morning! Yeah, never happens. Doesn't happen. Never happens. No.

Never. Because if we haven't got the bane we want up, we'll have drank the night before because we haven't got the bane, so we'll get pissed the night before. And you're hungover, so it never works. Yeah. Did you ever have any friends when you were younger

whose parents slept in separate rooms? Oh, did I? No, I didn't. i didn't know now my mate um did you not my mate john his mom and dad used to sleep in separate beds in the same room okay two single beds they had in one room and i know a lot of older couples have you still see that sometimes if you look on right move at big old houses yeah some of the rooms have got like Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda.

Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda.

Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda.

Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. Mae'n dda. and it's nice. Yeah. Robin's in the middle coughing on both of us. I honestly don't like going to that spare room. I know I get a better night's sleep but I'd rather just sleep in the, you know, in the sweat pit with you. You can't be poorly.

You can't be poorly right now. You are already knackered and moaning. If you add a cold to that mix, I'm going to have a nervous breakdown. So, no, sorry. Spare bed.

I mean, I'll go in the spare bed if you want. Can I just say, listener, in a bit that got edited out of the podcast, Rosie just looked across the table at us and said, you genuinely look terrible. So that was tonight.

That'll have been edited earlier on in a bit where we're rambling about what to talk about, but apparently I'm so knackered that I just look terrible. You don't look well. No? No. Really? You don't? What am I meant to be? Sorry. You don't look very no no really you don't what am i meant to be

sorry you don't look very well i got the most ridiculous injury that night so i was in the spare bedroom the radiator has been off in the spare bedroom because who's fucking putting their radiators on in all the rooms in the house that they don't even go in what are you what are you made of money oh money saver.com so i was uh in my uh i was in the spare room and i had one quilt on and then we've got that other sort of shore quilt and I put that on as well and I felt it was really heavy and it was like

weighing me feet down so I lifted both I was lying on my back and I lifted both of my legs up to make some space and I like pulled a muscle in my back I was like

I've just pulled a muscle in my back Chris how have you injured yourself duvet was too heavy oh my Christ I just it's like the shittest

way to put it can you imagine Chronicle does a story he's just been dancing so hard actually no that was then when he lifted

the two of his off his legs do you know when I was doing the Charleston I had to do a couple of cartwheels on the street I had to do a couple

of cartwheels I did a cartwheel in a corridor and I strained like a muscle in my arm and I kept going around going oh yeah I've like strained

a muscle in my arm people going how and I was going I did a cartwheel in a corridor and i can't remember who it was but they came up in the wind maybe you should um stop telling people like you've injured yourself doing cartwheels it's a bit weird in the corridor when you tell them like there was a fight or something and you like jumped in i was like yeah i will do actually it's like how did you hurt your arm cartwheeling in a corridor because I'm five episode 39 done and dusted thank you so much again

for listening honestly from the bottom of my heart I kind of believe that people listen week after week week after week week after week John Wick 3

on DVD now yeah guys it's genuinely awesome we're not just saying it thank you so much we love getting messages I get a lot of love on Twitter for this podcast

and please keep it coming it's great it really does it spurs me on to talk more shit in my kitchen literally

thank you very much if you want to get in touch it's shagmarninoid at gmail.com obviously I'm about to plug me to her the first leg of

my 2022 is almost completely sold out now it's incredible thank you so much I can't wait to get out on the road

and perform to you beautiful people and please obviously vote for me and Karen this week and strictly because next week's Blackpool and it would be a bit

fucking annoying to get voted out just before Blackpool oh you can if you go on just because I'm not being funny as well it's much closer it is much

a bloody crack and commute imagine if you didn't crack and commute if you were not in Blackpool you'd be like I'd happily have it in Blackpool every week oh same crack and commute yeah guys thank didn't go if you were not in Blackpool you'd be like I'd happily have it in Blackpool every week oh same

crack and commute yeah guys thank you very much please vote for me and Karen when you're watching the show and it's goodbye from me and it's goodbye

from the chocolate quilted is shit a pink and that's me chocolate you're trying to think of a noise

for chocolate I was trying to but I couldn't Augusta's out the chocolate river. Bye. Bye. Do-do-do-do-do. Do-do-do-do-do-do.

You're invited to an immersive listening party led by Rishi Keshe Herway, the visionary behind the groundbreaking Song Exploder podcast and Netflix series. This unmissable evening features Herway and Toronto Symphony Orchestra music director Gustavo Gimeno in conversation. Together, they dissect the mesmerizing layers of Stravinsky's The Rite of Spring, followed by a complete, soul-stirring rendition of the famously unnerving piece, Symphony Exploder. April 5th at Roy Thompson Hall. For tickets, visit TSO.ca.

Rock City, you're the best fans in the league, bar none. Tickets are on sale now for Fan Appreciation Night on Saturday, April 13th, when the Toronto rock hosts the Rochester night Hawks at first Ontario center in Hamilton at 7 30 PM. You can also lock in your playoff pack right now to guarantee the same seats for every post-season game.

And you'll only pay as we play, come along for the ride and punch your ticket to rock city at Toronto rock.com.