Sh**ged Married Annoyed - Please Keep Me Anonymous with Mathew Baynton

Episode Date: October 21, 2026

On this week's podcast Chris and Rosie are joined by actor, comedian, Taskmaster Champ and all round national treasure, Mathew Baynton! Mathew Baynton joins Chris and Rosie to discuss the Ghosts movie which The Ramsey's are are new converts of! They also chat about British comedy and what influenced the team behind Horrible Histories, Yonderland and Ghosts! Plus they talk Clown School, the North South divide and Mathew reveals that Take That performed at his school in the 90's... All this and a brilliant story from one of you lovely lot! The upcoming feature-length film Ghosts: The Possession of Button House is released in UK and Irish cinemas on 23 October 2026 If you want to get involved and have your stories and voice notes included on the podcast, then get in touch!  📧: [e-mail] 📱: 07874 406650 You can watch the podcast on the Shagged Married Annoyed YouTube channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠youtube.com/@shagged.married.annoyed Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello and welcome to Shagmary Noy. Please keep me anonymous. Coming up this week, we are joined by the very, very lovely Matthew Bainton. We're chatting about his new film and Chris is going to tell you about it. I took a really big breath in and I don't want him to waste it. Go on. Well, I was also going to see the incredibly talented and wonderfully well-spoken Matthew Bainton. Obviously, ghosts, the possession of Button House will be in cinemas. Cinemas, not just on your telly, cinema.

from the 23rd of October and yeah all the fantastic cast the original cast from the TV series Ghost which we have just started watching with our 10 year old going to try and binge it before we get to watch this at the cinema as well enjoy we had a fight about the jingle we couldn't set along a jingle

jing go so this is the jingo we hope you like the jingo Dingo Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, ba Gingo Liz's daughter's a really big fan So Liz said, when I'm doing the makeup Can I, can you please take a picture of one?

For B. Liz, Liz. Actually, smile. You're like fucking Wallace and Brumman. Liz, you do the one short. How many pictures are you not getting on there? No, I don't ask anyone at the moment. But it's always that thing, in it?

It's always that thing. It's whatever's relevant, like, whoever's relevant to you and whoever you're a fan of, then that's the thing. It's like, you know, that's the beauty. Scott from Five. That's the beauty of it. You literally messaged me and was like,

love the podcast and I was just like, oh my God, fucking Scott from, it's like, they were like my take that. You know, people who are obsessed to take that and stuff. They were my take that. Take that played at my primary school.

What the hell? Is this some sort of a sick joke? I sometimes encounter huge, take that fan, sort of middle-aged women. Yeah. And when I tell them that, their jaw hits the floor. It was, it was Essex Radio ran a competition to find Essex's best teacher. And evidently like one teacher in our school got all of her class to write in and won it.

And the prize was that Essex Radio came and did a school disco at your school. And none of us knew this was going to happen. but we all we were all told to sit down like it was an assembly we all sat down cross-legged and then take that who hadn't released anything

there was just like five very homoerotic men just like ran to the front of our school and mined and danced to oh because they used to be well it was it was like diligent people you wanted it was well totally that first single

yeah yeah and just just a bunch of 11 year olds like, sat like this. What is happening? And then they, I was on the front room, we all like, high-fived them as they ran out

and we were like, what was that? It would have been in the paper. It was in the paper. It's got a lot of paper in all about that. Yeah. Did you get picked for the paper a lot? We're on, by the way.

Are we on? We're on, this whole thing's on. All of that was on. Right, now I'm going to freeze. Yeah, no, you're not. No, no, yeah. You're not.

Now he's nervous. You'll be fine. If you're, freeze, I'll see it. Did I get picked for the paper all the time? If he freezes, I'll see it. Is that? I'll see it. If we ask you a question and you freeze, I'll have to see it. Okay. Do you know what I'm going to say? What? He's been desperate to say this. Answer the question, damn your eyes.

There is. He's got out of you, have you got out of the system? Don't mind that. Right, I'm off. Okay, I'll find a way to give you that moment. I told you to be cool. You were saying you were always picked for the paper. It's picked for the paper. It's I picked for the paper of a thing. I just think I was just a loud kid and cheesy. And also I went to a Catholic school and I served on the altar, right, in church on a Sunday with all of the stuff. Honestly, I think I was the favourite teacher because I was just close out of God, favorite child even.

Okay. Because I was close to God. Yeah, Catholic schools, man. What a servant on the altar? What did that entail? I wore the robes. What did you do? And this was reported in the press.

No, then I just got picked to me in the paper all the time. Have I like, What do you mean? So if somebody came to school, because we had Hunter from gladiators came to our school, and you just get your favourite kids out of the school. You get a kid out of every year group

to be in the picture. So my mum has got curtains of me and I just always wangled my way into the paper picture. Yeah. I didn't think that was a hard question. For example, things like, you know, if lightning had struck

and knocked the tree down, the kid in the photo. Yeah, the kid in the photo pointing at the tree would have been her. Yes, right. I see. What were you going to say about Hunter? What were you going to ask? Well, was Hunter one of the lady gladiators or the men were. Male gladiator and he was going

out with Uriga Johnson for a while. Hunter, you know what I remember Hunter? Okay. All I remember is Wolf. I very strongly remember Wolf. Okay. Because he was the bad guy right? Yeah. Was he? Yeah, he was the baddie. Who's afraid of the big? Yeah. Is that a wax London jacket, by the way? It is.

It's really nice. Well spotted. Oh me. I'm a big fan of me wax London. It could have been a Marxist because Marxies have also taken on a lot of the waxen They've done a bit of that, yeah. Marxists. Marxists, Marxists? Is that what you call Marxist Spencer? You are joking. Marxies.

Matthew, have you ever left London? There's a whole of that. Obviously. You're not ready to note. He left London when he went to France to study clowning at a French clown college. They don't call it Marxis in Paris. They call Philippe Goulé. This whole podcast.

The broadcast is going to be a North Sal divide and us mocking you for your nice late. Marx and Sparks. Marxist. Yeah, marks and Sparks. Marks and Sparks. M and S. Yeah. What do you call, what do you call ASDA?

What's that? You've got to stick an S on the end, Matthew. It's Asda's. Oh, what's that? Is that like a waitrose thing or... Azdas? Weirdroses. Do you not call it weird roses?

Does it? What do you do to Saints breeze? Seinsby Zizzizzes. That is very... That is a northern thing. We just put S's on the end of supermarket which is actually awful, isn't it? Teskos, as does.

Yeah, yeah. Like it's a person's house and the person's board asda. I'm board as does. Well, that's nice. And I presume people are friendlier who work in there. It's a very lovely place to live.

So as a kid, did you sort of think that that was, the people serving you were Mr. Mark and Mrs. Spencer? I would imagine so, yeah. I'm playing along with this. Fuck him. He's not, he's not going to him.

It's not going to embarrass me on your podcast. When we were kids, we didn't go to Marks and Spenters. Of course, yeah, yeah. Although, actually, no, we did because South Shields Town Centre, and if there's anybody from the council listening to this, why the fuck did you take our Marxies? They took our Marxists away. Council didn't have anything to do with taking the Marxists.

Well, who took them away? Marks and Spencer's. Well, there was a Marxon Spencer's on King Street. And it was brilliant. And my mum's friend, Maureen, worked there for years. And then at the end of the day, you could, You could buy stuff for 20 pence, the food. 20 pence?

She does kill comedy, didn't she? There was a look in his eyes when he went, and my mom's friend Maureen, and there was a little look in his eyes where he just thought, what the fuck? Why are coming? What am I doing here? I'm right, I've written a movie and I'm here.

No, we don't know what I'm going to talk about? Unbelievable. Sad day in South Shields, when they're... Honestly, people still talk about it now. Really? Yeah, they're like, why did they take the Marxie? And the Woolbats went And there's a shop called T and G.

Allen, that was really nice, that went. Mate, our high street. The high streets are dead. There was a top shop? Yeah. Anyway, Listen, I'm obsessed with this clown college thing.

Sure. How long were you there? I was there for about nine months. Wow. Yeah. Is that, but it wasn't... A semester or did you leave? I'd love to play into the fun of the idea of clown.

Yeah. Clown College, but it was... Clown was one thing. thing that he did. Right. And he was like famous. He was particularly famous for that. Yeah.

He's no longer with us. He was a very eccentric, very brilliant sort of theatre teacher who his speciality really was clown. And when I say clown, it wasn't like circus clown. It was just exploring

how much of an idiot you can be and what exact flavour of an idiot you are. Okay. Like pandal falls? No, it wasn't like, it wasn't like that at all.

It was literally it was just, it was, every day was basically a variation of go behind that curtain and then come out and be funny. Okay. And it was sort of a baptism of fire in a way. Like it was hell in a way. Like it's the worst,

it's like performer's worst nightmare in many ways. Like, I have no material. And if you, I remember the whole point in a way was to kind of stop, stop you from arming yourself with ideas. Yeah. And to just be genuinely like open to failing. That's really good though. Yeah. So you sort of go through this like process of deep humiliation.

Yeah. But everyone is going through it together. And then you kind of, I guess you, well, way he put it was you make you make friends with Mr. Flop as in when you try to do something funny and it's not funny and there is that horrible orc a bit like now there's this horrible awkward. This is not. This is really interesting. This is amazing. Matthew, these are our interested faces. I see. Sorry, I know we look stupid, but this is genuinely kind of like. I know that Rosie's interested face and I can't believe Marksies is a shud face are very similar.

but there is a slight difference and this is the interested face. Okay, cool. I've never seen an interested face like this before. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo babadoo babadoo babadu babadu bad. Have you ever done stand-up? No. So as a stand-up, it is, I didn't believe it until I happened the first time

and I remember people seeing it. Dying on your hole, having an absolute stinger is an important part of getting good at stand-up comedy. There is no good stand-up comedian out there who hasn't had. of death. We all die. Yeah. And it's exactly the same as that.

It's, yeah. And it's sort of realizing that sometimes the gold is, is in that precise area. Like, it's not arming yourself with more and more and more to avoid that place. It's like, if you dare to sail really close to it. Yeah. And kind of, you kind of acknowledge with the audience that this, that this has the danger and the

capacity for you to just humiliate yourself, then it gets really electric. And like you can find, you can find laughs that are kind of more delicious, I think, for that level of like danger. And you see it audience. So you see you all went behind the curtain. You see audience, how many people were there? It would be, it was just the class? It was just the class, yeah.

Oh my God. And he would just. No, like, there was one French student there when I did it. And they were from all over the world. So he would teach. in English and but sometimes insult you in French and yeah he would just you would do you'd be trying to do stuff and you would feel how this is what I loved about it's like English drama schools if you do something shit yeah what everyone does is go mm that's really that's really that's

really interesting oh okay that was really interesting wasn't it guys and then everyone sort of nods politely and you just have you know it was shit yeah And you just have it sitting in your belly and it doesn't go away. With Philippe, you would be doing something, you'd be midway doing something through doing something, knowing that you're dying on your ass. And then he would like, he'd sit there. I remember one time he just got his keys out of his pocket

and started just looking through his keys. And gradually everyone's looking at him. Rather than you. And laughing at him. and eventually just sort of stop and he goes well they are more interested in my keys

than what this is shit that you are doing and he would like... I think he was at a film my only good but everyone would laugh and he turned to like your friend and go was he shit? Was it boring

or was he excellent you know and they would go yeah he was shit and you beautiful it was wonderful like because by the time you sit down it's just like there's nothing in the air it's just all i love that i love it i absolutely yeah what people don't know as well is like in tv with comedy sitcoms that i think one of the worst things the camera nobody's allowed to laugh right well they can't laugh can they when you when you're doing a sketch or something or delivering funny lines nobody laughs it's so destroying It takes a while to get used to. It takes a long time to get used to that.

Yeah, I really remember that feeling the first bits of telly I did. And like, realizing that I was getting heavier and heavier in my performances because I was trying to get this boom guy to go or whatever. Oh, a little giggle. And then having to, like, having to realize that I was getting worse with, like, that, with that instinct. At the best, best advisor have I got. I was doing Jason Manfred's comedy rocks on ITV. It was a TV show years ago

and I was doing a stand-up set on it and Lee Mack was doing Graham Norton in the next studio and he came in to say hi because I'd recently supported him at a gig and he came in and I was just about to go on stage no one in the crowd just to do me run through so the cameras knew everything about my routine and stuff

and he went what you're doing I went I've got to run me stuff he went don't run it he went do not run it in this room I went why he went if you run it on stage now in front of silent cameramen silent producers and everyone the last time you'll have done it

you'll have in your head being dying on your hole and it's in this room that you're about to go and do what on telly you're gonna give them the bullet points if there's a part where you lie down or you do a frigging car wheel or so let them know so that you'll follow with the camera do not run it word for word

or it'll be the only thing in your head when you go on and I was like best advice I've had best advice that I've had for TV recording company yeah yeah but I had to be a bit of a diva and go no I'm not doing it I always hoped I would get to do there was so much audience

studio sitcom when I was growing up like that was all the stuff I was loving like bottom, ab, fab, all of these shows and that's what you I kind of thought the career would have in store for me if it went well. Yeah. And but by then, studio sitcom had kind of gone out of fashion.

Yeah, it's like single calm now. And it is such a shame because that that actual laughter in a room there's nothing like it. Not going out does it? Might be one the last ones not going out. Yeah, that basically is, yeah. It's them and Mrs. Browns boys are the only ones now. I think it should come back. I think it... I did a pilot that Harry Hill...

Harry Hill piloted a sitcom and they didn't pick it up. Oh, no. And it was so funny. Really? It was him and Jennifer Saunders was playing his mum. And I was his uncle, weirdly, that he kept locked in a cup of it. God, I mean, yeah. I was like, I had long white hair and a long white beard.

And I think I was meant to be naked. I think it was like you never really saw Yeah It was so funny But they didn't pick it up Sounds to me that you need a particularly Brie of Commissioner to go with that one I guess so but Harry Hill was so like

You know after TV burp It was like It's huge, come on People would lap up anything he does TV burp was great wasn't it So good So good Like what that like

It was such an amazing trick to like Because I had been obsessed with Harry Hill when I was a teenager because I I don't know how I was introduced to it but I had a VHS of one of his stand-up shows and it was just the most amazing like I sort of couldn't believe what he'd done with the art form I know that sounds really wanky but like there were no jokes it was just things

yeah yeah yeah but like everything he would he would like seed a hundred different jokes and then keep calling them back and it would just be he would pick up his pocket and go you like the lining, you like the lining to one guy. And then he'd send someone off to find out who puts the holes in biscuits. And every now and again, he'd go, what news of biscuits? And it was just like building up this like incredible web of like callbacks. Yeah.

He's one that all sticks in my head as he said when he says he gets back to his car. He gets, it's just this routine. He goes, I was going up with me car. There's a traffic warden standing next to your car. And he's mimicking them right in the ticket. And he goes, and I went, whoa, whoa, whoa, come on having me that long. Come on. Leave it out.

Leave it out. No, you leave it out. it's me day off and he handed me a beautiful charcoal drawing of my car. Fucking unbelievable. Unbelievable. The idea that the traffic one on the day off stands and draws cars. It's just amazing. A bit moreish, isn't it?

He's so... Yeah. And TV burp was just this like amazing. It was like, oh, he's found a way to like be as weird as he's always been. But utterly mainstream at the same time. Like, that's the most extraordinary trick, I think. I know. And it was back when we all watched the same programs, wasn't it?

So we don't, everyone had seen everything that he's talking about because there's only the five channels I wanted by back then, wasn't there? And you'd be watching, you'd start watching soaps in a different way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We used to, I remember, I've watched something with a parent and you'd be like, what's Harry Hill going to do about this? That'll be on TV, but yeah. When we did, when we did more Gilligan's Chatchel with them,

I tell them my favourite. line from TV Bird, but he obviously didn't remember it because he was doing thousands of them a week. But it was when Bear Grills did a survival thing in the snow and he gets in the water and he gets out and he takes all his clothes off and he's getting the snow and he's putting the snow

on him to get the water off of him. And Harry Hill just goes ah snow, nature's towel. Oh, you did not remember that at all. He actually looked at it as quite black when I said it, but I'll fucking tell you. He said it. I remembered it. I remember that. I'm sure I said that. Now listen, speak of incredible TV. We have a confession to make. We are sorry. I'm mortified. We are mortified. We are sorry.

Ghosts passed us by. Wow. And we have just made. Can you believe I went through all of Tasmos and I never did. I literally nodded along. No. It was when we were... We have just started watching with our 10 year old. Two night ago. We watched it. We watched two episodes bang bang and then it was Sunday night and we're like, oh my God, I'll let him still half night because I wanted to watch the second one. And then we came down to London Monday. night and I had last night I went I said to her I said let's just watch some more ghosts and she went we can't have to watch it with Robin we'll have to watch so we can't watch it I can't watch it again it's Tuesday now I can't watch it again until Saturday night

and I'm really angry it's sensational I know we when it came out because I googled I was like why did this we were very heavily into Marvel because I hadn't seen any of Marvel and Chris made me watch it in chronological order

Wow I've not seen any Marvel Oh wow. So, well, just be you won't. Which is why I admire the fact you've started Ghosts, because sometimes when you know that it's accrued, quite the catalogue, you just go, I'm just never, that's too much. And if I start, I'll have to finish,

so I'm just not going to go there. And that's sort of how I feel about Marvel. Yeah. Although it's lucrative, so if anyone is watching who casts, I was going to say, you can be in it. I actually love it. I love all of it. You don't have to have seen it.

You don't have to see you know. Oh, it was great though. Now we're hooked up. Oh, thank you. And also I love, like, it's one of my favorite things is hearing that family's watching it together. Yes, yes. Because it was such a big part of my childhood was watching comedy. Yes.

Like with the family. Same. And I feel like there's sort of less stuff that does that for people. And it is my great hope for the film is like the idea that people might go to the cinema. Is a full family. a family. Yeah, absolutely. Well, the opening scene came up and Robin went, this is horrible histories.

You can see what we were doing. Well, what you did was, you found a group of people you enjoyed working with and you kept working with them and I commend you. Do you know my wife's sitting next to us here? The only person I do work with. What I love about it, with a very simple re-edit, it could be a horror. Yes, yeah, yeah. With a very certain, a little couple of bits out here and there

and it's a horror. Yeah. that's a bit with a little um I'm just gonna rain you in because I'm just embarrassed that there'll be people listen to this who've watched all of them yeah yeah but you're just fresh to it that's fine no I love it okay good so for instance

to the people at home and this is what I'm embarrassed you can do my job for me for instance you know where they go a used to build a year I think your character says you used to be able to hear a little girl singing and then she pops up and she's just like ring around

if you come out of that a moment early because I looked at Rob and I was like, is he going to be frightened here? And then it's, and then the comedy comes in and then when the, the Sergeant Major, whatever, looks over and goes,

and there's just the, it's honestly, may I'm going to enthuse about it all day. So here's my question. Is the movie following on or is the movie recap and carrying on? The movie follows on from the end. But it is written

so you don't have to have said it. There we go. Amazing. I mean, it is full of Easter. for people who do know the show. But it is a completely like self-contained story. So it kind of re-establishes all of the characters at the beginning as if it's,

as if you haven't seen it. Okay. Because I read something, spoiler alert, they have a baby. Really? That's going to come up. We're excited for that. In Matthew, where Marvel, Marvel does that as well, by the way, Marvel. At the beginning of every, no, they don't have babies, they're not allowed.

They outlaw them. They don't. beginning of every modern movie you will you can just you can go and watch Avengers Doom's Day you'd still know what it was still stuck up but now we're actually that's what we're doing currently squeezing everything in can I please come don't go to the cinema without us

I was so upset that you and Robin went to see Spider-Man without us listen it just is what it's going to see it goes to go to go together as well yeah go together this I'm going to go twice just for you Matthew I'm going to go twice thank you I'm sneaking in the second time thank you and if everyone could go twice

Is it a PG? Is it a PG? or 12. It's a PG. But it's funny you say that about the horror stuff because the first series went out post-watershed. Right. And it was because there were two things that I remember the compliance came back and said,

one was, my character in the, I think it's in the first episode, says I'm going to drown myself in the lake. Yes. And so that that gets marked down as a suicide reference. And you go, he's he's dead. He's dead. That's the joke.

Right. And the other is the stump of the headless ghost, right? Which is considered quite graphic sort of a quite, you know, macab horror thing. But it was that thing where like the audience was so clearly families, even though it was on at like 930, that I think the kind of that compliance department or whatever department is were like, oh, it is. it's fine.

Yeah. And so I think second series went out pre-water shed and it sort of stayed there. We'll let you steal. You'll steal more, cause something. That's the thing.

There was a bit of me was like, at a moment. Keep it. We always want to keep it on that edge. Yeah, yeah. I think the moment you're making some, I think it's why horrible histories work because they cast a bunch of like young,

fringe comics like me who weren't, like it wasn't cool to be doing kids TV. So like we, none of us were kind of interested in making, I have enormous respect for kids TV. So there's no disrespect to me saying this. But like, we just wanted to be funny. And we wanted careers doing sitcoms and stuff. And so we weren't like necessarily cocker hoop about the idea of being kids TV people. So we pushed against the edges of like what was allowed to be done.

And we tried to kind of make it as adult as it was allowed to be. be. Brilliant. And same for ghosts. And I think it means that kids feel like it's a naughty thing. Yeah. They're just about. Yeah, it was a bit scary.

You know, they're lucky their parents let them watch it. Yeah. And that was it for me. Like, I remember watching Python, like my dad letting me watch Python and, you know, they're being all sorts of stuff like, life of Brian, there's like full nudity. Oh, yeah. Yeah. It's great.

They won it. So brilliant. Well, Bottoms a bit like that. Bonham. Bottom was a little bit. I loved bottom. I watched that. I was 40 young to watch bottom.

Yeah. that but my dad had it on and out, I watched it. Yeah. You know, brilliant. It's just the best. I mean, Bottom was a massive influence on ghosts. Yeah? Yeah, really. Because when we came up with the idea, so ghosts, we've done

horrible histories and then we went and did this like fantasy comedy on Sky. And then that was coming to an end and we were talking about like, what should we do next? And we literally like hired a room and sat in this room and brainstormed ideas. And one of the first things was haunted house. And we all got really excited.

We had all these, like, all these ideas which is still in the show of like, well, maybe ghosts stay exactly how they died. So, like, what would be a fun, if you have an arrow through your neck, it stays there. Like, if you die, if you, if you, if you, if you were sort of a Tory MP who died in a kind of sex act, you are stuck that way. So, like, the first iteration of Julian, he had, like, a ball gag in his house. And we don't really makes me so hard because it's in there the whole time Fantastic

So we made ourselves laugh With all these like ideas And then we're like Okay right So what would the stories be Like what would the episodes be And then we were just like They're dead

Okay so they don't need jobs So they can't They can't eat They can't Like what can they be after That's going to create any stories? So we just shelved it and started working on like a sci-fi idea for a while. And we kept kind of coming back and going,

but the haunted house thing feels really fun. Like if we, if only we could crack it. And the answer was like the problem was the answer, right? Which is so often is like when you're writing stuff where we're like, oh the stories have to be super super petty. Like instead of looking for stakes, which is where you normally go, for like anything narrative it was like well what if they're just arguing over who gets the dead lady's bed you know that's the whole of the first episode is like who gets to sleep in that

room and it was like ah now we've got and we talked about bottom it was like bottom is a really similar kind of yeah nothing happens completely kind of existential sitcom where it is just like the two how do we pass the time sorry the only two episodes that imagine but where anything actually ridiculous happens outside the flag. Ferris wheel, camping. Yes. Yeah,

yeah. I can't really think of another one. There's one where they own a shop, I think. They watch the shop for someone. They watch a shop for someone, yeah. And Richie puts his shirt on backwards

so that it feels like a, and he's like getting Eddie to pretend to be a shoplift. Or no, he's just imagining catching a shoplifter. Yeah, yeah. It's just ridiculous. Oh, God.

But it's the thing. It was like, oh, Bottom, bottom made that work. Like, bottom did this completely kind of existential thing where i mean the thing that the absolute like peak of it that sticks in my mind is when they're trying to pass the time and they're thinking of games to play and richie's going let's play pin the tail on the donkey and eddie's going well we

haven't got a donkey we haven't you know we haven't got a tail he's like well we've got i don't know a fridge right we haven't got a tail i don't know sell a tape let's like, put some cellar tape on the fridge. I'd love just remember that. It's amazing. Madness. Absolutely madness. So good.

But like you see, watching it with your parents, like that is some, that's some like core memories right there. Totally. So thank you in advance because I feel like you passed us by it, but now it's coming to the perfect time. I think it's from the perfect time. I think we've found it when we needed it.

I think we're watching it with our son and it's going to be amazing. 10 is a great age, I'd say. It's great. We're marvel with him and American office. Do you remember a sitcom called? Chalk. Did you ever watch that? Shalk. It was short-lived.

But I remember, the reason that I just thought of it is because it led to me asking, asking my parents what the word fallatio meant. Fantastic. Oh, God, yeah. I don't remember Chalk. Yeah. It was really funny. It was Nicola Walker.

Okay. A young Nicola Walker was the lead. I remember Charlie Chalka. And David Bamba. Do you know David Bamba? No. He was missed, he was, do you remember the pride of, the Jennifer Ely pride and prejudice? Right.

Which I would say is our. generation's pride and prejudice. We had, we chatted with, um, who were talking, Rachel Paris were chatting about this. We're talking Colin Firth. We're talking the Colin Firth. Yes, that's our generation. So the, uh, what's the vicar called? Or the, the, the one that, who the sister is forced to marry.

Anyway, David Bambor is, okay. He's like the greasy vicar in that. Oh, right. Okay. Okay. Do you know if I saw, if I, it was a good sitcom, but brief. I've probably seen, my mom and dad were banging to like comedy sitcoms. So you went and asked your parents were.

Felicia. Yeah, we were sat watching it together. And if, I mean, God knows if you can even watch it anymore. But I think it was a thing where a teacher writes, like, pretends that their name is fallacious. I can't remember what the sitcom device was. It led to the word fallacious being written on a chalkboard. Oh, God. And my mom and dad laughed.

And I was like, well, what does Felacio mean then? He just refused to tell me. You did that with motherfucker. Yeah, I was allowed to watch. I was allowed to watch terminator as a phrase, to be, terminate. Terminator,

it's like, yeah. I remember going into the kitchen and going, man, what's motherfuck? Andrew's like done to that again. Well,

how old were you? That would let you watch terminator one? Like five. Like five, terminate at one. Okay. But Matthew, it's done me. No fucking bother at all,

you. Right. I'm completely fucking normal, you bastard. This much is clear. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo. Babadoo. You've got a story for us.

How do people do this? Do I sort of story time it? Do it like the French teacher in this clown school? Hold on, where's my feet? Where's my thing? I think that's going to take away from the content, I think. We don't know what this is about. Yeah, we've got no idea what I go.

This is just sent in by so. And it is, of course, anonymous. Hi, Rosie and Chris, please keep me anonymous. My dad recently had a long-awaited hip operation. I'm not sure if this happens to everyone but my dad received a before and after x-ray image of his hip Okay nice What my dad clearly didn't realise when he sent me this

is that also included in this image Was his x-rayed 60-year-old flaccid penis and balls On an x-ray? Yeah you can see them yeah It's just coarse to the image but you can see them I like that they specify placid as if anyone would assume he fucking loves x-rays

Matt he loves get these x-rays yeah they don't go out of the room because of the radiation they go out of the room because he's swinging a rock hard penis around

so they go on to say to try and save his embarrassment I decided not to mention the genitalia in the image and instead opted for, wow, what a great job they did. And no wonder you were in so much pain. I kept quiet until one day during a family meal at a restaurant we have been going to for years.

It's a nice detail, isn't it? That's nice. Yeah. Regular. I don't think it's relevant. It's definitely necessary. All right. I came back from a trip to the loo to see my dad talking to a waitress and taking out his phone.

My heart sank. somehow I just knew what he was going to show her. I think that is relevant that they've been going for years. I told you it was relevant. He's going to knock out then he. I ran back to the table but it was too late. The waitress was politely nodding and clearly uncomfortable as my dad was pointing out his new prosthetic hip.

I was mortified. When the bill was paid I broke the news to which he responded, yes you can. You can really see it all, can't you? I had no idea. Turns out he has shown this image to just about everyone. His mates at tennis, the people that work in the post office, colleagues, his elderly neighbour,

and even his grandchildren. No, oh no, that is lush. Oh, God. That is gorgeous. Is it possible that he's basically wanted to be a flasher all? all his life and he's found a safe way of doing it. Oh, I had no idea.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, he's just, actually, yeah, he's a wronging. Yeah. Which hasn't mentioned is that he's got a Prince Albert either, so it shines brightly. You would know, unless he's got bad eyes. To be fair, it's a shadow of stuff, isn't it? On the next ray.

You might not have seen it, might not pick it all. The bones are the bright bits. And if he's focused on the hit. Yeah, let's try and believe that he's not. Yeah. Maybe everyone's not a pervert. Like me. No, most people are pervert.

Just come on. But also, there's no shame in the human body. Yeah. And it was. Fossack. Unfortunately. Thank you. My pleasure.

We've all got one. Rouss he's got a massive one. Yes. Thank you so much. Thank you so much for a comment. It's been a pleasure. My pleasure, thank you. Best look at the movie, man,

and we're going to crack through the entire backcalf. Thank you so much. Yeah, we're going to have to... I can't wait. Yeah. Brilliant. Cheers, man. Cheers.

Thank you.