Sh**ged Married Annoyed - Rosie Gets Scammed By An Inflatable D*ck

Episode Date: May 29, 2026

On this week's Shagged Married Annoyed, Chris and Rosie Ramsey discuss Rosie's trip to Verona, their different reactions to potential intruders, a Hen Do scam and why Chris very much felt his age when discussing the Radio 1 Big Weekend. They also chat about roller skates, robots and Rosie reveals how she was humbled by Sandra... All this plus beefs, a mum related voice note and some fab QFTPs. If you want to get involved and have your stories and voice notes included on the podcast, then get in touch! 📧: [e-mail] 📱: 07874 406650 You can watch the podcast on the Shagged Married Annoyed YouTube channel: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠youtube.com/@shagged.married.annoyed Today, get Huel’s full Lite & Lean Starter Kit online with our code SMA30 for 30% off at https://huel.com/SMA30. New Customers Only. Thank you to Huel for partnering and supporting our show! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Coming up on this week's episode of Shagmarydanoid. We talk airports and Rosie's holiday tales. Rubbers in the night. Speaking of crimes, you try to kill comedy again. I can't help that I'm a sensitive soul. Awful. Getting old. Getting old and robots.

Beefs. Well, a beef from you. Yes, I get off scot-free, actually. Questions from the public? And we clear up a lifelong geographical mystery. No cap. Keep listening. That's what the kids say, no cap. No cap?

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Luxury sales claim based on S&P Global Mobility Canadian New Vehicle Total Registrations for calendar year 2025 for the Cadillac definition of luxury. Hello, you are listening and watching Shagged Married and Oids with me, Rosie Ramsey, and my husband, Christopher Ramsey. Hello. Rosie Ramsey is? Yes. Hi. Hi. Nice to meet.

Oh, do you know what it is? I've been away for three nights. She hasn't been here. Literally no idea who this stranger is. This is ridiculous. On Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, four nights. Four nights. A bit of Verona.

Yeah. Verona. My Verona. Like, honest to God, so beautiful. Not a holiday. No. 16. One day we did 16,000 steps. We walked seven miles.

You sported me yesterday and you said seven miles and in my head, I didn't say it out loud because you know, you get triggered by stuff. But in my head I went, not a holiday. Yeah. If you said to me, unless it was golf, if you said we're playing two rounds of golf, we're walking seven miles. I'd say absolutely that's dance. Although it's hot, let's get a buggy.

I would not walk seven miles on holiday, not a vacation. But you get to say everything that way. And we're like walking. Well, we didn't go out in the night times. I haven't told you this. We just went to bed. Right. I'm not surprised.

Like drank wine. in bed. I mean, I've had a great time. Don't need to go out. Don't want to get changed again. I don't want to get showered. I know what you mean. And wash my hair and go out on a night time.

Yeah. Nah. Honestly, on holiday, leaving the pool to go and get ready for the night upsets me greatly. I know. Upsets me greatly. But I had a mint time.

It's so beautiful. I'm going to have to take you. Like, it's stunning. It's one the most beautiful places I've ever been in my life. If you can put us around in a wheelchair, I'll go. I'm not walking seven fucking miles.

You could walk. You don't have to walk seven miles. Why would I do that? Segwe. Hoverboard. Oh, I'll go on a little hoverboard. That'll be, my, Eva, Rona. Is it seven miles or is it seven kilometres?

I think it is seven mile. Europe in it, so probably kilometres. That's fuck all that. Great. Well done, you. Well done. Welcome back. Thank you.

This is the podcast. This is the studio, that's a microphone, the things in your ears. They're earphones. That's a camera. Great. Sap a smile on and let's crack on. I'm tired.

I'm tired. And I think I've caught a cold. Yeah, great. Because, do you remember lockdown? And do you remember COVID? Blanked it out Right, coronavirus Yeah

My Corona My Corona Hey I'm getting loads of these the day Well there's some people There's some people I don't think they live through it Right okay

Because men Right mostly men of a certain age Just sneethin A pound Every time you said that But carry on Just I hate them Yeah

Just sneathing Sneathing Yeah Just into the air Just literally like Thinking that they were actually being well-mannered By turning their backs away

but just not covering their mouths and just covering it. Right. So, only men are at a certain age. You're not going to enjoy this. You're not going to enjoy this. I'm on their side a bit. Why? Because if you sneeze just into the ether, if there's no one in the way. In a room.

Okay, not in a room. I mean if you're outside. Nobody even outside. Sneeze into something or onto yourself and then wash yourself. Don't just, it's awful. So if you sneeze on your hand, your hands a lovely warm environment for the bacteria at 11. thrive. So if you sneeze on your hand, you should sanitise or wash your hand immediately, right? However, if I'm outside, if I'm in the park with the kids and I'm standing the corner,

I'm sitting on the bench in the corner and the kids are playing and I need to sneeze. I'm not sneezing on me hands because I haven't got anything to wash my hands with. So I'm turning around, I'm just sneezing onto the floor or onto the grass because it'll die immediately. But we're talking about a city centre. Right. You know, a very touristy, lots of people. Right. But there's no one around us, I would sneeze into the, like, towards the floor. if there's no one around us, I will sneeze towards the floor just because otherwise I've got sneeze all of my hands and then I'm going, you know,

why can't you just agree that? It's gross and I've caught a cold off, an old bloke sneezing. I think you've been kissing them. I was not, I was not kissing. I can't speak. It was, so, I think it was because it was me, the age demographic.

It was very, I was very young on that flight, which is crazy because I'm 40 this year. And also I've got one of that gripe. Them new scanning machines have got. Right. What the fuck? I don't understand the new scanning. machines what is this tell everyone they've introduced them in Europe so it's you scan your passport and then

you've got to do um you got to do a picture and then you've got to do your fingers so my mom bless her is nearly 70 she's got quite dry hands right i don't know what it wouldn't pick up her fingerprints what to do it six times. Is she a man in black? Is she had a I don't think she's this. I said well I was like you could rob a bank sand dry and get away with it. Wow. I was literally pressing a fingers down on this machine and it wasn't picking up my little finger. I was like, you're dead inside, who are you? And it's just...

So, like, literally, when we got into the country, I don't know if it's a political thing, I don't know enough about it. I don't want to get into the politics of it, right? Right. Whatever. It's just a pain in the dick. You get in, you've got to do your passport, you've got to do your picture, you've got to do your fingerprints. But obviously,

if it was a cue full of Gen Z and millennials, it'd be done like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, you know, you're talking, the older generation, And I'm talking all the older generation, bless them. Like, it was just really tricky to understand. I understand. And, you know, they haven't.

Well, I mean, it's a new technology for them, yeah. It's new technology. And, you know, of course it's hard to understand. So it just took. Wow. So it took so long. So it's fingerprints and face and passport. So you do it once.

Yeah. And then you've joined another queue. Then you do it again. And this is just getting in. But obviously, my mom's bloody crow fingers didn't get picked up. So she had to go in a separate queue. Didn't get picked up again on the second one. Cro fingers.

Poor bug out. She literally was like. Wow. What the fuck? I was like, you're dead. Anyway, so then you do it twice going in, and then on the way out, you've got to do it again, another two times,

and then the check it again, the check for passport. My passport was in the space of a four, like, trip. Check six times. Jesus. I'm like, who do you think we are? Wow. It's gone, and then obviously you get really,

you're like, what they're doing with this data? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what? They've got me. Yeah, yeah. Now they've got your face, your passport, and your finger. It was just a bit unnecessary.

It's nuts like. So yeah. So if you are going, this is just a tip. I think Greece have done away with them. Right. Apparently. But if you're going on holiday,

leave, if you're going back to England, leave a little bit more time in the airport because it's going to be a night night night. And moisturise. And moisturise because, yeah. So anyway,

but other than that, it was really, really lovely. Good. Well done. I'm glad. And we're going on holiday tomorrow. We are.

We've had to record this in advance. So if you listen to this, this has been recorded beforehand. So yeah, you're literally Tommy two holidays. You're back for one day. We're doing a podcast. We're doing a load of work packing and then we're fucking off again. Thought it would be really sort of like glamorous.

Do you know when you like? It's trashy. Instagram and the internet and social media have led people to believe that traveling is glamorous. It's fucking dog shit. It's not anymore. It's not glamorous at all. It's trashy.

And I think they do everything in their power. to not make it enjoyable. Yeah. Because I think... It's almost like they do it on purpose. I think they are. Let's not forget, you're being fired across the continent

in a canister in the air full of other people's farts and coughs and sneezers. I genuinely think they're actually trying to make it so that less people. I think too many people go on holiday. And I think they're just like, right. I've said this before.

Like, you know, like you come out again. We've met, man, Corona, you know, the lockdown, remember. We had that lockdown. We had that summer. It was the, there was no flights. It was the greatest summer we've ever had. It was incredible weather.

All the climate went up, everything. And then all the flight on again and everyone's like, oh yeah, it's weird that. It's not weird. It's not weird. There was, it was, it was a thing. It's not weird.

All the flights were down, so no one was driving around, no one was doing anything, all the emissions went down, whether I went back to normal, wasn't fucking windy. And also no one was driving. I did think about this.

Yeah, no one was driving, no one was flying. And everyone's just gone, oh yeah, smart, that ain't it? Crazy. Yeah, it's meant to let in it. Listen, thank you so much for being here. Thank you so much for listening. Thank you for being part of Shagmarydanoi.

Please continue to like, and subscribe on all your podcast, Podcast shops and on YouTube, you will wait for the main body of the podcast. This is now business. It's time but this week's lucrative, lucre of sponsor. This week's sponsor is, and it's an ick as well, and I can't believe him when I've done it, but I might know if you never know. It is wearing a cap on top of your hood. Ew, he was doing that.

Saw a guy the other day, I couldn't believe it. Literally walking along, hoody on, hood up, cap on top of the hood, putting the hood to his head. You look like a fucking playmobile character. Stop doing it. That's a new one. It was madness. Wow. I've never, you look at a fucking, you know what?

them snakes, you got a fucking cobra. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. They've got that thing on the side and it's just obviously a cobra. I wonder if it did keep you subtle. Was it raining? No, wasn't raining. Just a, just a strange dude. So yeah. Maybe like a trendy thing. Well, it wasn't trendy. He looked like playboy.

No, but certain trends. People say, right now, he looked like a Playmobile character and I didn't like it. All right. And do I regret running him over? No. That's what that didn't in the cars, by the way. Oh, is that what it is? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

We had a fight about the jingle Jingle, Jingle We couldn't settle on a jingle Jingle, so this is the Jingle Jingle, we hope you like the the jingle, Jingle, Babadoo, Babadoo, Babadoo, Babadoo, Babadoo, Bacadoo, bagadoo, bao, jingo! Hello, welcome back.

Welcome back, welcome back, back, back. Yeah, no, but holidays are lovely. And once you're there, it's fantastic. Again, it's first world problem is winging about, you know, but can I just say it is very much. I will not be, no, no, no, you will. It's human nature to whinge about whatever. Do you what I mean? But also, I don't think as Brit we would go abroad as much if we got the weather.

We just wouldn't. I don't think we would leave England. We have got, like obviously as a tour and comedian, leg two on sale now, Chriswamsiecombe.com for the next tour. Best tour I've ever done. Thank you very much. Listen, tell them the truth it is, isn't it? It is a very good tour.

I've been to some beautiful seaside towns that have died because of international travel. And so, you know, I'm talking like, well, what's, winter gardens where they're there? Margate, you've got Margate. You've obviously got Blackpool. You've got Scarborough. Yeah. You've got your skednesses. Hey, Brighton's just.

South Bloody Shields? South Shields, of course. Tynemouth. Brighton still does very well because, A, it's easily four degrees warmer than here at any point. and it's just outside. Yeah. So you've got all that money going on. Eastbourne,

places like that, like Western Superman! All of them. Sorry, I have to say it like that because of T4 on the beach. Oh, yeah. Yes. Anyway, what are you going to say?

But yeah, but we don't get the sun. We don't know what that. So it's just depressing. Anyway, that was, I was done. I have got some things that happened on the trip,

if you want to know about them. Always got to hear stuff that's happened with you and your arm on your list. Just a couple of little things. Yeah. So my Kate, I don't know if you know this about her,

but it's, I feel like it's a really big part of our personality now. She's found these ear pods, air things that she puts in her ears and she can't hear her thing. So she just sort of like, when I was she in a bed with her and she puts them in at night and she's like, don't talk to us because I can't hear anything.

That's terrifying. That's weird. Like, what? That's terrifying. We were in a travel lodge because we flew from Leeds because there was no flights from Newcastle on the days we wanted to go anyway. And she's just, I was like,

you're just sleeping in a travel lodge, just blocking out the world. What the fuck? Crazy. Just literally eliminating one of our senses. Selectively deaf. But literally, I didn't sleep, right? I didn't sleep the night in Leeds.

I think I saw it every hour, right? I just don't know why. I was just wide a fucking way. And I was like, I'm so tired. And she was getting, honestly, my earpans. You know what you're like? I couldn't. It's terrifying.

I hate it earpods. I couldn't do it. I like to hear stuff. Yeah, I know. No, she's just like, what a life here. What a life. Sorry, can I just say, I heard the police helicopter the other night. Uh-huh.

The middle of the night I woke up the police helicopter I was kicking about South Shields Do you know I fantasise about them hiding in my garden and me catching them Who? Whoever they're chasing

Whoever the police So I get up whenever I don't know if I heard I'm moving around in the night But if the police helicopter has ever about And I've heard it I'm at the windows

I'm at all the windows I'm looking out of the back I'm like I will This is my moment Yeah Local Brazilian digital two blue belt Oh my God Holes rubber

Keeps the And I'm like I'll find them looking at You gotta have dreams Honestly. Why not? I literally, I'll have a hold of them, right? I'll have them back.

I'll have both hooks in, back take. I'll have them and in the ear, I'll be going, this is my moment. Do you know what? That's so upsetting. Why? Because as a woman, I think about which room I'm going to lock me and the kids in.

Oh, I say, I'm going out of me. Isn't that the difference there? That's not a knife. This is a knife. You're like seeking it. You're actually looking for it and hoping that you're going to catch a rob. I'm every night pre that we don't get robbed.

Yeah. that I don't get raped and murdered in front of my children. Isn't that crazy? Are you trying to kill comedy again? Is that what this is? I think that what this is. Is that what this is? Have you lost the ability to just take a fucking joke? You have to go

honestly, the amount of... If I had to quit for every time you said, as a woman, I wouldn't have to do this fucking podcast. I could just go and retire and live on an island somewhere. Not that kind of island. I'm sorry, I don't give a shit, that's what I'm saying. Yeah. That's what I'm saying? Do I have to always be funny? on the comedy podcast

Alright, alright, well, girl Do I, listen, please Be a fucking nice start Like, be a start Daisy, put we in a different category Because I'm sick I'm sick of having to be Lighthearted and merry

All the time Put it in the one where everyone starts crying Put with the new category What's the category Would say something, start crying The interviews Factual That was when

Crying Yeah, I do I've got an escape plan You're looking out with the window so you can catch them. I'm thinking of ways. I will go outside and I will take this robot down.

This is me. God. Not if there's two of them. I'm jealous. Brazilian digestive doesn't work if there's two with them because the other one just kicks you in their head. I also

sometimes this is going to make it sound like a psychopath but me and Carl have spoke about this many a time. If I'm in a bad enough mood and something's happened and I happen to be walk along the street and someone slightly dodgy has come up towards that I think I could physically take in my head I'm like, please,

and I know a lot of men will feel in my head I'm like please and I know it's a lot like come on punk make my day but it's it's that vibe We're built so differently weird in it I know that people look

I think it's also a bit of a midlife crisis I didn't want this when I was 20 I didn't want that smoke but I want it now Maybe it's because you've done jihitsu now as well and you know that you could actually Maybe maybe Again if they're lighter

I say it in my show Lighter completely untrained Wow you know Possibly with you know Nah I think he's a lot of all just a little bit angry inside. Yeah, you are. Yeah. Yeah. But it helps get it out. But yeah. No, but I'm

sorry. I know. I know. It's very different. You don't have to apologise. No, I apologise. You're not one of them. I would be scared of. Excuse me? You're not scared. Sorry. You can look out of your window for me all you fucking like. I'm not scared of you. I would beat the shit out of you. That's different.

I think I am quite hard. You would just talk us down you. You would just talk us into the floor. That would be that. Do you want to hear something else? I'd love to hear the rest of this stuff. I'm sorry. So, um, just constantly. humbled by my mom, with an almost 40-year-old woman. The best one was,

she was in the bathroom, this is the morning, oh no, the night before we went away in the travel lodge. A lot happened in the travel lodge. My toothbrush was out on the bathroom bench. Bear in mind, I'm a very, I look after myself.

I'm nearly 40. You know, I'm not a cruff. I do look after myself. Humble, just from the bathroom. Oh, someone needs their toothbrush head changed. That's a fucking great one. What a burn. What a burn.

So I said, Kate, I went, have you brought your electric toothbrush and she said, no, I went, oh, so she's talking about me. Just, there's nothing wrong with it. I got out, literally was like, ma'am. She was like, it's, it's, frayed. She was like, it's frayed. It's not.

It's not. But what have I done today? I've fucking changed the fuck I haven't had, because she gets in there. She's got in there. So I've changed it. Speaking of Humbold, can we, can we, sorry, you got another one there.

I've got a couple more. So, not to kill comedy, but... Yeah, we're going. So, something happened, right? Which I... Sort of impressed, also extremely pissed off. And you know when you say you want to punch people in the face? I was scammed.

Like, not scammed. You were scammed. I was nearly scammed. Right. Right. So, there's this new thing, right? And we saw a couple of hendos in Verona. And I was like, it's not a hendoo place.

I was like, this is weird. Dressed up all of the stuff, like in the T-Matching T-shirts, and I thought, yeah, I was like, this is odd. Anyway, you know, whatever. We're walking down to the Coliseum, it was packed.

And this girl, dressed in a penis inflatable thing. Great. It was like. They did it. They've ruined everything, didn't they? She was dead, jolly. Yeah. Really lovely.

Pissed. I thought she was pissed. And she was like, I've been dead by my, She was with a group of people. She was like, I've been dead by my friends to get pictures with people, so can I get a picture taking with you?

And I was like, oh my God, I was like, yeah, of course. Like, you know, you're on your Hindu, and I know that you do days on Hindu, like my mates have done them, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So we got a picture taken with her. Yeah. And then she was like, do you want to stick out of me,

my husband to be? And we're like, yeah, go on then. And she was like, oh, bloody, blah, blah, blah, having a great day. And then, and then at the end, and me, ma'am and Kate were really wise to this, and I was not. Don't.

change for I were to get a drink. That would be so cool. That would be great. My mom, my mom went, no, no. And Kate straight away was like, no, no way. I literally, before they said that, had me hand in my pocket. I was going to give her like three euro

to be like, have a great time. And it was a total fucking scam. It was a total scam to the point where my mom was like, if we didn't have, they'd like get a picture with you so they couldn't pickpocket. you? What the fuck?

And I thought the lengths that they've got was slightly impressed but then we walked off and watched them and they did it with loads of other people just got... I can't imagine being scammed by someone wearing an inflatable fucking cock costume? I don't think I'd

ever come back from that. She had me hook line and sinker. Fucking hell. I swear to God. And you know when you like annoyed for the rest of the day I was like that little bitch that little fucking bitch? No no what you mean. Oh yeah. Oh. Because I was like yeah yeah yeah. Oh you're getting married and she'd give her this hole

she was like, I'm getting married, I'm not getting married, such and such. And I was like, oh my God, great. That's unreal. That, I'm very rarely am I speechless. Uh-huh, it was crazy. That's a fucking bold scam. I know. Wow.

But it was so strange because the group of girls that she was with were like huddled, but they weren't like paying any attention to us. They were like had the backs to us. It was just so odd. But my mom and Kate, they like, they clocked onto it so quickly. I was going to give her money. Fuck. Just to be like, oh, have a great time

Like have a drink on me type thing And then I thought What, that's, you wouldn't ask? Where was you from? English? No, no. Okay. No.

That alarm bells are ringing immediately Because the inflatable cock thing Seems like a very English thing to do. Yeah. I'd be very surprised. That's why she had us because I was like, home! Yeah, no, dare I say it, walking around any country in Europe,

a woman on a hendoo from England with an inflatable cock Probably listen to this right now. Like that's why. There are people. I was so drawn to her and that's why I got me vote to it with her because I thought...

Oh, it's been really sad. Oh, I know. It was really, it was really horrible but then I... Well, I told you when I got, when the phone me was. At least it's putting some effort

into it. At least you're not just stealing from your bag. I'd rather just be fucking... Bit of acting. I literally I was like... I think I'd rather be... I think I'd rather be...

I'd rather be blindly pickpockered to just go into my bag and realise something's gone than be fucking romanced into it and cheated on in one go, do what I mean?

Yeah, I felt really conned. I was like, you stole a minute of my life. When the banked on me, when they phoned up me and they pretended to be the bank and stuff, I was having a bit crack on with that. I know. I know. And then when I realized then I got the bank to phone that number again and it didn't exist and I was like, I made it a laugh.

I know. I know I'm not trying to sound like ridiculous here, but you know when she was just like, yeah, you're right. I was like, I can picture our accent. I was like, okay, you're from an area that I've probably been to. Yeah. You feel like they've stole a little part of you, don't you? Well, they'd give her a little part of my, because I was like,

e, how lovely. I'll tell me exactly what they've stole. They've stole a little bit of your faith in humanity. Yes. And I would say, don't let them steal it, because everyone's great, everyone's not great, most people are cons. So, yeah, they're right to steal.

They need to keep stealing it until we've gotten on left, and then that's the only way we'll be able to live free. Okay. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, so I had a horrible little revelation the other day with me mates. Obviously, I don't like talking about being old, because obviously there's people who listen to this who are much older than us and there's people who are much younger and it's just an age

but when you get on a certain bit in life sometimes like I said there's now children serving us in bars which I find a little bit jarren I was having a drink with me mate to the other night now as we record this today it is the 21st of May as we'll record this by the time you listen to this we'll be back off a holiday but this weekend coming

Radio One's big weekend is in Sunderland in Herrington Park in Sondland and I remember when I was younger I worked at the stadium of light, and I was, you know, I was like 17. I'd just got a car, a little rental, Cleo, and all the other guys who worked there

were all banging to her music. It was like, Radio One's Big Weekend. I remember some people got tickets. Other people like jump the fence, and it was like a big thing. And I was standing having a couple of drinks with my mates, not a few days, not but a few days ago. And one of my mates went to my other mate,

hey, you've seen that Radio One's Big Weekends at Herriton Park? And I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he went, yeah, yeah. And he went, yeah, hey, you're seeing the, And I'm expecting, are you seeing the line up? He said, Are you seeing the road closures? And the other mate went,

Yeah, I'll not be driving around there then. Fucking nightmare that, like, yeah, you're going to have to go around the other way around and that bit of the eight years. And I was just... Oh, Chris. And it was like, yeah, fine. Like, fine.

But Fat Boy Slim's on. He's our generation. Yeah, that's mint. Yeah, but... There's some really good. People on... Have you seen the... road closures.

Fucking wounded. I would have loved to have gone but it should be too busy for me. Oh, but too loud. It'll be too loud. It'll be too busy. They'll all be bloody smoking their vapes. How are you getting home?

How are you getting home? You're not going to be taxi. You'll not get a taxi. You're not going to get picked up because of the road closures. Yeah. And the last time... And all the food in there

too salty for me. Yeah, just... Doesn't agree with us... Cues, man. There's loads of cues. E in the toilets. Oh, disgusting. E, you can't.

Disgusting. The last time I went to a gig. That was like not too far away from home but not close enough to like whatever. Was at the stadium of like the Spice Girls years ago. Do you remember? When I pissed myself on my shoe and we're home because we had to walk home. Classic but a show

I'm already annoyed. Yeah. For the history there. Brilliant. Oh, babes. Yeah, old bastards. Babadoo babadoo babadu babadu. Speaking of being old, I tell you what freaked me the fuck out the other day I was driving through Sunderland and out the corner of my eye, I was on the phone at my mate obviously I was just always on the phone to Jordan or Carl or someone, right?

I was on the phone to Jordan and I went, mate, I went, sorry, I think I've just seen a robot going down the street. And he went, what? And I went, there's a just-eat robot going down the street. And he went, oh, yeah, yeah, they're a thing. I didn't know there were a thing here. I've seen them in London. Literally, a little.

I hate them. I've had so many questions. I went, well, I went, do you just meet them somewhere? other than they go to your house he went I think they go to your house I went how did they get across roads he went I don't know I went how do you get the food out when you get there

he went I imagine it's a code and I went oh I got like honestly a robot Have you ever seen Judge Dredd The first one was Sylvester Stallone No Not Carl Urban

Rob Schneider Rob Schneider is in Judge Dred And he hides in a In a food robot When there's a shootout at the beginning And the food robot's just thinging around and it's going, um,

it's going, eat recycled food. Recycled food is good for the environment and okay for you. And it's that. Yeah. It's unbelievable. Yeah.

We're living, Land Cuckoo, Landman. I'm, I'm really sorry if you live in a part of the country where robots delivering food is the norm now. But I mean, I had to go and pick up something from the garage. But can I just say something, right?

Yeah. And this is wild and maybe a bit, privilege, right? But why can't we say no to these things? There was never a vote. Is everyone okay with robots? Delivering shit on your streets? No, I'm not actually. I don't want them. Don't want them? Well,

it wasn't walking along. It's just a little fucking bogey. I know, but I just, it's just rank. Right, but okay, so vote your feet. If not enough people use them, it'll get scrapped. That's the point. But I've only... Do you know, you made me pick up something from the parcel thing, the drop off?

I won't have a bad word. I won't have a had word against the drop-offs. I've never done before. I've never done before. It was unbelievable. I went up and it says tap the wake up. I tap the screen. I know I sound like I'm 7,000 years old here.

And I scanned the QR code and it said door open and stand back. I stood back, door opened. The parcel was there. So actually, so okay, I'm not a full ludite. I'm not a full ludic because that I can get on board with. So if that, you would not like that parcel on wheels coming to your door. On its own. No.

No. Because then the problem is it takes it out of your hands. What if they can't reach the doorbell? Or you get a text out of there, I guess. you think it's got a little like standable line I don't know I'm just like where I would it be I just don't know how people I just said to me mate

I said to Jordan I said how are people not kicking the fuck out with these like how I don't understand why someone hasn't just ran over and just flipped it like we live in a place where people do stuff like that well we grew up in the 90s like yeah it's a difference in time

like I don't know what when I'm ever do babadoo babadoo babadoo babadoo babadoo ba so I'll tell you one thing I often forget how many people listen this podcast and I forget like it's sort of I constantly do yeah yeah and I forget that it's sort of part of people's like

life and we're out there in the world. And I got reminded... Hi everyone. Hi everyone. I got reminded an incredible way and this is why I love our listeners so much. So I obviously trained Jiu-Jit-T at SBG in South Shields. You have a bluebelt. It's behind us on the thing, you're not saying. The place itself is amazing and they do kickboxing, they do all the different

things and they've got stuff for kids and everything and the staff there are awesome. And there was a medical emergency in there, right? You saw me looking at the video when I got sent to video. of the medical emergency. That was nothing to do with the training. No one got hurt in the training. It was a pre-existing thing

that happened to the person while they were trained. I just have to say that so you know that nothing happened under ward in the place, right? But this is the funny bit. The paramedics came to the scene to sort out the person

who was having the medical emergency and my mate who runs the gym said to us that one of the paramedics was down, sorting it out, sorting the person out, helping. And the other paramedic was just standing watching. And she stood up and she looked around the room and she went, hey,

Is this the cuddle club? Stop. Stop. She listens to this? I'm saying God, yeah. And he texts us, he went, you'll not believe it. He went, they were sorting it out.

He went in one of the paramaric. She looked around. She said, is this the cuddle club? I went, you can piss off. No way. He said, I'm telling you, she said that. I went, that's incredible. Incredible.

I just forget. Did anyone comment on the video you shared on Instagram? Which one? The gayest video in the world. You mean me doing... So gay. A mounted triangle. You mean me doing a mounted triangle on someone?

If anyone watch it. rivalry. Chris shared a video of Cuddle Club the other day. Yeah. So gay. Yeah. You are so gay. Yeah. It's gay as fuck. It's great. It's great. It's great. But also just therapy for bloke. It's therapy for blocs. It's fighting. It's let's have a fight. Let's high five. How good was that?

He's got a lot of testosterone. Like it makes sense, you know. Whenever you watch the UFC and I'm like, oh, these two hate each other. And at the end, they're cuddling. You're like, well, it was fake. No, they've just got it all out. It's gone. It's gone. I don't. I don't get it. Anyway. Yeah. Well, there we go. Yeah. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, bah. It's time for what's your beef.

What's your beef? What's your beef today, baby? So, my beef, I have been, I have been dry aging and marinating and slow cooking this beef. Baby, baby, baby, baby. Since you went away. Oh, before I went away. This is, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I have tested this beef out on multiple people, almost like, you know what I'm doing

new stand-up. Great. And you hear me tell the same story to multiple people in my life and you want to die. I can't think of what

haven't. Well, Carl's had it, Jordan's had it, Auntie Caths had it. Right. A few with us someone else. It's a stranger had it.

Oh, yeah, one of the dads from schools had it. One of the moms from schools had it. Everyone's had this. So my point is this beef has been

road tested with the people. Everyone's on my side so you can't kick off. Okay? I mean, watch me. So, everyone listen to this podcast boys, girls, everyone involved.

Gather around, listen to this. Rosie Ramsey. You, you, I'm talking to you, don't look surprised. I don't know what you're talking about. You took our children just before you went on holiday. You took them to Smith's toys

because they had gotten some pocket money off Nana Bridget. You took them to Smith's toys and you brought them home and in an hours time, no, no, no, shut up. In an hour's time, you were leaving to go to Italy for four nights. And you bought our children, as you were leaving the fucking country, you bought both of

our children with no prior experience. Do you want to tell everyone we bought them? Roller skates, baby. Fucking set of roller skates each. Hi, Chris, we're back from the toy shop. Both your children have got roller skates. Bye! Ciao!

Ciao! I was for human. I've never been so angry in my entire life. Hey Chris, I'm about to go. Here's an incredibly dangerous toy for both of them

that needs constant monitoring. Bye! Ben the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie. Honestly, I've known nothing like it. I've known nothing like it. Well, all right, sorry.

I have got a constant tummy, like, flabby bit above my bikini line from carrying those two children. So you can't deal with just a little bit of roller skating. Why do you get some roller skates? I'm down the promenade. If you want to have a competition of who's had a harder time with these kids, I'll go there. All right, I'm going on a golf trip in a couple of weeks with the lads. Just be prepared. Don't.

I don't. You know what they get any. You know what they get in each? Six puppies in an air rifle. there you go lads there's an air rifle each six puppies don't shoot the puppies but you know bye great no i know okay okay but in my head they took they chose them themselves and i thought it was really wholesome and i thought oh that's really sweet have they been on them much no no no did you put them away yeah no took the wheels off took the wheels off no no i didn't rave didn't want to go on

his again robin went on his but just round the house falling into the cupboards and stuff horrible genuinely horrible i've known nothing like it oh sorry about that oh god in there any Honestly, any chance for me to mention my gun, and I will. I think it's my gunt. It's not. Is that, Fanny? Yeah. I've got one of them and I also.

Listen, I don't have a beef with you because I went away and you've been minted with the kids. Not one little word of complain and it's only took you in nearly 10 years. They're really easy now. They're really easy now. My anxiety is lower. They're really easy. life like honestly anyone I said this to call the other day anyone out there who's got like really really young kids and it's like suffocating

when you like obviously you love them so much but it's suffocating the whole organisation everything you've got to do and you feel like you're spinning plates but they're smacking the plates off yeah gets easier it really gets and we've got a big age gap and it still gets easier well thank you though because it made my time away really enjoyable and do you know what like I said this before because I think the world bombards were with reasons why we're not happy yeah like all these videos like you've married a narcissist

or not like not telling you you have but I don't get that I'm just like yeah that's just your algorithm algorithm algorithm knows something I don't but I don't know if it's just a woman thing and it listens to conversations that you have but anyway it's just sort of like I don't know but

anyway listen I was in Verona call me hand I was in Verona with Mom and Kate and I had a lovely time but the whole time I was there I was like I would love to be here with you And it was dead romantic And I just thought Oh, after how many years

We've been married now? Like nearly, we've been together Like 13 year Yeah But I was like after 13 year I still want to be in a romantic city With you So that was nice

That was a nice affirmation Why are killing comedy again? I'm not killing comedy I'm just telling you something nice Oh thanks But genuinely And I think that's like Sometimes you know when people go like

How do you know if you're in a happy marriage Yeah I think that's like a sign of it Because if I was there and I didn't give you a second thought, then I think I'd be like, oh, I'd probably not going to have me married. But I genuinely was like, I would love to go there with you. Well, thank you. And you know, I'd happily do that.

But I realised when I was on tour this year just gone, second leg on sale now, I, on Saturdays and Sundays, during the week wasn't as bad if I was just in a hotel or kicking around or go to the gym or whatever. But on Saturdays and Sundays when I was just in the van, in the hotel, and I would ring you and I was aware that you three were all just in the house.

I was like, I'd rather, I'd rather be there. Oh, yeah, there comes a point where I said to my mom, actually, I was like, you know, when the kids were really little, I was desperate for escape. Yeah. I was always, and I always felt like, oh my God, like it's just, but I've really missed them. I really missed you all when I was away, actually. I was like, oh my God, it's finally, it's finally happened. Yeah, but this window was really, really small, as they keep telling you on the internet.

This window's small, and then soon they're not going to want anything to do with when we're going me left going, oh my God, because it's so fucking tough when they're tiny. It's so hard. And then it becomes really fucking fun for an incredibly fine amount of time. And then they're gone. I know. So we need to embrace it. And we're going on holiday tomorrow.

And it's going to be bloody lovely. Exactly. And I'm really looking forward to it. But don't piss us off. Wow. And I'm sorry about the roller skates. She gives her that you take it away. I've packed them for the holiday.

Yeah. Please don't. Exactly. Exactly. No, you're right. It wasn't a good decision. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo. It's time for questions from the public.

Questions from the public. Public. As always, if you'd like to get in touch, it's shagged married annoyed at gmail.com. If you'd like to write formally a long form correspondence, should I say. And if you'd like to send a voice note, it is 07874-40-60. Thank you kindly.

Lovely, jobly. Hi, Chris and Rosie. I've been wanting to send a voice note in for a while about my mum, weirdly. when Chris talks about Sandra and about her being a Womble That always reminds me of my mum Because my mum will do anything for a bargain She loves it A bit of background on my mum

She's 4'11 She's a lollipop lady She's never smoked in a life She's very innocent She told me once She'd been to the charity shop And she was so excited She's got this top

It was a real bargain She was really happy it was an Adidas top and she was like oh I'll wear it I'll wear it tomorrow and she came round to my house and took a jacket off

really excited to show me this cheap adidas top that she'd got only it wasn't an adidas top it actually said it actually had like a cannabis leaf instead of the Adidas logo and instead of saying Adidas it said addicted

she didn't have a clue what this meant so I had to explain it to her and she's never won it again since oh I love it oh God love her oh that's great oh

oh I don't want to sound pathetic here but it's even funny I'm cusses little well because she's 24 11 is dead funny do you know how many little them are going to be yeah you shrink didn't you

you shrink I'm only 5 foot one yeah I nearly laugh to turn 4'11, I thought that'll be me. Probably go down to 4'4.11, yeah. It's just in between your spine. You need your hang every day. You need your hang.

Is this? Yeah, you need your hang every day. Great. I'll add that to me. You're that bloody nine million things I've got to take. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All your supplements. Collagen.

Collagen, yeah. Livenmy. We're going to 5 o'clock in journal. Oh, no. Walk on the grass barefoot. Practice gratitude. Hang. Get in the bin.

Get in the bin. Not in the bin. Actually getting in the bin. Bad in the bin. Really bad for your spine. Yeah. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo. So, the A1 sex shop

have been in touch. No fucking way. Yeah, it's actually got to prop my name. It's not just the A1 sex shop. It's called Poulton Cocktails. It's a franchise. It's a fully blown, like, what's it called when there's loads of them?

Franchise. There's loads of them. It says here, hi. Collaboration opportunity. Okay. Hey, I'm all ears. I'm a businessman at the end of the day. Yeah, we love a bit of money,

no matter where it's from. We recently came across your reel featuring our A1 store and honestly we loved it. We'd love to invite you both to visit the store properly as our guests. We reckon your followers would genuinely enjoy seeing what it's really like inside the store. If it sounds like something you'd be interested in, we'd be happy to chat through what a collaboration could look like and find a date that works best for you. So thank you so much. For the sake of our children, I think it's a no. It is a no, I'm sorry.

If we didn't have kids, I'd be all over it. I would be dildoing me tits off. But, or in my tits. Is that where you put them? I don't know. Loob. Anyway. But I did actually,

to give them a proper shout out of it, I went on their Instagram and I watched a reel. And it doesn't look awful at all. It doesn't look seedy at all. It looks really nice. Yeah? Genuinely.

And what does it sell? Like costumes, brassiers, like sex toys. Long trip home. Something on the way home, bit spicy. I buy, yeah, a bit spicy. Yeah.

I'm on me home. I've been working business. and so we're on me way back on the A1, pop in, get a little pear, edible knickers for the wife. They, so, like literally, we're just a bit vanilla. Again, yeah, we are. That's just us, but a lot of people aren't, and that's their lives, and I hope that he's do really well,

pulse and cocktails. It makes sense, actually, because the amount of time I've been in the W.H. Smith at Weatherby and asked for a fucking... Leatherette thonged backpidies. A couple of cock rings and some mail beads, and they haven't got them. They'll say, what the bloody hell's happened in this country?

But you're right, I'm in the wrong place. Yeah, I'm in the wrong place. Yeah. Fuck. Makes all sense. So thank you for getting a touch and much appreciate it. Big love,

pulls and cocktails. Shout out. There you go. You've got your free advertisement. You've got your free ad on the box. So there you go. Congratulations, wow. Babadoo, Babadoo, Babadu, Babadu,

bah. Hi, Rosie and Chris. I have three stories of sexual embarrassment for you. There it is. One with a woman, one with a man and one by myself.

Well, look at that. See New Evil, hear a weevil, speak New Evil. Hey, all of the sexes. Come on then. One.

When I was about 14, I went into the bathroom for a wank, grabbed some lotion from the shelf and did my thing. 14 were lotion? Come on, what? Fucking kids these days. What do you mean? lotion? I didn't try lotion years later.

Did you not? He's lotion and up at that? What the heck? Lotion? You're already on a lotion at 14. Jesus. Where do you go from there? It was only when I was cleaning up.

I realized it was actually my mum's tanning lotion. Heaven's to Betsy. I had a very sun-kissed penis and right palm and nothing would get it off. again. I just had to wait until it faded. Court red-handed. Literally. Coat brown-handed.

Goat brown-handed. That's great. That's devastating. When I was with an ex-girlfriend, we were once getting hot and excited in the bedroom when she decided to try and add in some sexy talk. She sensually whispered the words, you can ping my flaps if you want. What a fuck a microwave?

10 minutes, 10 seconds, 800 watts. Ping. I just laughed and said, No, you're all right. And the sex time ended there and then. No, you're all right. Still no clue what you're expecting me to do. Ping my flaps.

Ping. I've got a pair of flaps. Congratulations. Thank you so much. Thank you. And I don't know what that means by ping your flat. Like flick them? Ping them? I don't understand.

People like getting whacked sometimes, don't they? They're flaps. If it's a thing that we like. Oh, God. Pings are amazing. I don't like anything like too aggressive. No, no, horrible. Like, oh, no, but not, it's just, I hate it one again.

Why, let's not talk about our sex. No, no, no, no, come on, man, the kids are getting older. We can't, we can't, we can't, everyone else and talk about it. I said, shame, not shave. We can shame everyone else, but we can't talk about ours. Ours doesn't exist anymore. We've done it twice, and that was it. Remember?

Yeah. And it was horrible. Wond a horrible. Vile. Um, last one. My first experience with a man. So I think this is a man. Okay.

Yeah. Like this, he's got a penis. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, he had a tonal lotion thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So this is a man.

Hey, you're like Sherlock Holmes. Well done. That was really good. Deduction. My dear Watson. That was phenomenal. I don't know what that works at this.

Elementary, my dear Watson. Yeah. Elementary, my dear Watson. There you go, thank you. My first experience with a man was one I met on a certain app. Okay. We agreed to meet in his car in a local car park.

As I got in, I saw he was about 20 years old than he claimed. Heavens. That's upsetting. But I soon forgot about this when I noticed some movement in the back seat.

I turned to see a small, fluffy, fluffy white dog wagging its tail. No way, man. The guy told me to ignore it and told the dog to stay. He really took dogging

to the literal meaning of the word there. Just leave your dog at home when you're going out shagging. You have got to take a dog or it doesn't count as dogging. Poor dog. It's just human and...

The guy said to ignore it. Right. after some orquette kissing he took out his rather disappointing dick oh no this is why Harry Potter and the rather

disappointing dick oh my god such a person that is rather disappointing that is two of the two of the most lethal burns I think I've ever heard

in my entire life have happened on this episode of the podcast rather disappointing dick and someone needs that toothbrush head changing fucking don't put

Don't put me in the same as this. No, I'm not coming back from either of them. No, what a dis. Humbling. As I knelt down at Sucket, so he's still going for it. Whilst I was busy, he was turning around to stop an excited dog from jumping into the front seat and was repeatedly saying to it. What we're in?

What is it? Listen, this is awful. And was repeatedly saying to it, the dog, what's daddy doing it? What's daddy doing it? That's horrible. That's horrible. That's horrible. I quickly stopped, made my excuses and left.

That is horrible. horrible. Oh, listen to this, which was fine with him as he had to return the cart of his parents who he lived with.

No, that's disappointing. Everything about that. It's sad. It's really sad. It's grubby. And I don't like it. I don't like it at all.

It's made us very sad. He should have left when his dick was really disappointing. You should have pinged them flaps. I know. Wow. Don't get the, what's daddy doing it?

That's horrible. That's horrible. Anyway, I thought you'd like these stories. We kind of, like, kind of did, but also, I love it every second of it.

I hated them, but I loved how much I hated them, so never stop. Yeah. Never stop. What's some sad sexual experiences? Yeah, I think that's the thing. Pigmy flaps probably put them off girls. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, the disappointing dick and the dog in the back,

he's probably, what's it called when you don't want to have sex at all? Asexual. It's probably celibate now, we're cats. Yeah, don't blame him, honestly. Listen, dude, there's an amazing sexual one that we are fully involved with. Poles and cocktails. We're fully involved with and endorse. Yeah, he's all there.

Just use the code. Chris and Rosie, you can get yourself kicked out of the shop. Babadoo, Babadoo, Babadu, Babadu, ba. Hello, Ramsey's. Hope you're okay. We are. Yes, we're great, thank you. Thank you. I've discovered a new ick about my husband that I needed to share immediately. Brilliant, thank you. We are on holiday, and I'm writing this as we're on the bus transfer from the airport to the hotel.

Nothing sadder. Nothing sadder. I don't care. There's just something about that extra little bit of traveling. I don't care what. I don't care if you're getting a limo from. the airport or your hotel, it's still the worst bit. Got to drop everyone off. Yeah, it's just the, I mean, they dropped everyone off, yeah, but even if you're on your own one and a taxi one, like, it's just... Do you remember years ago when you didn't know where you were going? That was a thing that people could do that could just book them holidays,

and yeah, they didn't know what one I'll go and you would pull up and be going, is this I was, is it this one? Look how amazing it looks, no. It's like a full fucking holiday of, look what you could have won. Yeah, for a villa. I think it was off teletext holidays. And every single villa stop that, the maid, we were like, this is, like, look and going,

oh my God, it's amazing, is it us? Is it us? I mean, luckily, the villa we went to his kids was closed. I know. A wild way to live.

And now we like, read every review. Yeah. Like, check all of the pictures. That's such a good point. Now we're like, yeah, oh, this place looks good. Five stars.

Hold on, hold on. Someone said that didn't renew the towels daily, right? We're not going there. And we, yeah. Is it madness? Does that still happen? Are we privileged?

Does that sound? Can you still book a holiday where you've got no clue what your accommodation is? I don't know. You probably can, but no, I don't know. I mean, no.

It can't be. No, I don't think it does. We'll find out. Crazy. Yeah. I'm excited. Excuse me. Exciting.

Terrifying. Yeah. I wouldn't sit well with it. No. Listen. I'm writing this is where on the bus transfer from the airport of the hotel,

we haven't even got to the holiday yet. Oh, and she's already getting knocked out by him. Right, okay. As the bus departs, my husband takes out his phone, opens Google map, and puts in the hotel destination as if he's driving so that he can follow along the journey

and make sure the driver isn't going wrong. He looked so proud of himself and all I could think was, ugh. Do you do that? Yeah. Do you do that? Yeah.

Do you? Regularly. Really? Oh, I didn't know that. Oh, God. Sorry, I think most blocs do that. Oh, really, is it? Yeah, I'm literally like,

because I want to know, one, I want to know how far it is. And two, I just want to think, alright, where's he going to here? And I'll just have a little look at the route. If I've got a train to catch, I sometimes check how far away it is. No, but I mean like in a foreign company, yeah, uh-huh.

So I like the, um... You're on your holiday. Why does he care? I don't know why I do it. I do it. I'll do it when we go to it. I'll do it tomorrow. I will be doing this.

What time is it now? I'll be doing this at about this time tomorrow. In a taxi from the airport to the hotel. Okay. Literally look and going to go out. That is wild. That is wild because, do you know what I find crazy about that? And I don't want to be a comment on dick.

Oh, I'll have to ask you what the hotel's called. Yeah. Oh my God, I do this. I've just been slanging off. I go on holiday and I've got no idea where my hotel is. I don't know where we're going. No. Ah, I booked this on teletext, that's why.

No. Chris, you have not booked anything. But you will, but you'll check how far it takes to get the hotel. Yeah, but I'll ask you what's the hotel called by the way. Really? Do you actually know? We're going to New Yorker. Yeah?

Yeah. What airport will fly now? Palmer. Oh, well done. Okay. Well, that's because it's the only year bought in Miota. I don't know which one. Me, double L is it, E.

E. So we're going to Mi York. Mayorka. My Yorka. But then there's Majorca and Menoka. But then there's Majorca is definitely a different place. Majorca, I've always been on the fence about that. I don't know if that's just people saying it wrong. I don't know if that's just jalapino.

I don't know if that's just halapino jalapino. I don't think. Do you know what? Do you know what I hate when people are like, where are you going? And I'm like, I just say Palmer. I don't know because we're not staying in Parma

I don't really know where we're going No Majorca and Majorca is the same thing Great Top question on Google Well fourth question Are Majorca and Mayorka The same

Yes Majorca and Mijoka Are exactly same island In Spain's Beleric Ballerics But yeah My name net Completely bottled that And I moved away from the microphone

About Sorry sorry sorry, I'm dead busy. No, what's Menorca? Fuck me, Minorka's a different one. Yeah, Minorka is different. Also in the Berlin. What?

Monarch has a smaller island of Mayorka slash Majorca. Let's actually, like, zoom in for me. Let's actually learn this now, okay? Because I'm sick of being thick as shit. Right, so. So, well, let's just look on the map here now. So how do you pronounce where we're going? Majorca.

Mayorka. That's Menorca. Menorca. That's Parma. That's Magaluff. Okay. So where's the place that's spelled M-A-G-O-R-C-A? Majorca.

That. It's just the way they spell it and the way we spell it. No, I think that's what it is. Mayorca is the original Spanish and Catalan spelling of the official name. Majorca is the anglicized spelling historically used by English speakers. Also, we've bastardized it as usual. Great. So there's not three different places.

No, no, no, no, no. Minotas one, and Majorca are the same, but we've aluminiumed that. Oh, God, okay, good. See, I said that, didn't I said it's Jalapino. I knew that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, brilliant.

So, yeah, and all on the, yeah, everything islands. Jesus. But also, you welcome, if you've learned anything. Yeah. I can guarantee everybody. And Majorca. Everybody who edits our podcast will now be thinking, why do we work for these twats?

These fucking. Why are these? No. Whop morons. In charge of what we do and they've got to edit this. So, guys, we're really sorry. Just they're very, you know.

Again, if anyone says, if you hear anyone saying Majorca, they are just seeing Fagita and Jalapino. That's all that's happening there. So there you are. Good. I'm glad we learned that. I feel better about that.

Do you want to is? That has plagued me for some years now and I've just avoided this. I've avoided it. Years? Yeah. I feel better now. I feel great.

My Yorker and Majorca, same thing. Yeah. I'm going to say that to someone on the holiday and they're going to go, yeah I'm gonna go yeah there's only so much room in here in your head yeah there's no room in yours you're kidding it was like you know on storage wars when they open one of them metal containers and there's just like a

dusty old fairground ride in it that's your brain I'm struggling at the minute actually because I need to go and find a pair of sandals in the garage right it's all I can think about oh can I please beg to not be part of this at all no I'm not come to the garage look for fucking I'll buy you some of sandals I'll buy a new set of sandals. Listen, we've got time. We're going tomorrow.

Airport sells sandals. Oh, no, not good ones. Do you know? Oh, oh, accessorize. Okay, maybe. Do I'm not going in the, I'm not. I will smash the garage button that opens the garage. I'll smash it and ask that the key.

Morrowing. What's that? If you're just there when I'm doing it, I get it doing better. I'm not standing in the garage while you look for some sandals that you won't fucking wear anyway. No. No. No. No.

No. No. No. No. No. No. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, ba. As always, thank you so much for listening to our stupid little podcast.

Yes. And it's just lovely, lovely to do this still after seven years. So nice. It's lovely to have you here week after week. We love you. We do. We really, really appreciate it. Thank you so much.

If you want to get in touch, it, Shagmarginoid at gmail.com. And as I reach over the desk from your phone, because I'm incredibly professional, if you want to send a voice note, it's 07874-40-6-0. you've got your phone in your hand Chris Ramseycom The next leg of my tour is on sale for the autumn It's selling fast

But obviously not fast enough I wouldn't be fucking mention it every five minutes Oh you're gonna have to go on telly You can have to do some of them Oh my God Maybe even some rival podcasts No

So someone out there is gonna have to start A podcast because this is the only podcast They'll have to start a podcast open I'll have to go and do that podcast Oh you're gonna go and talk about your feelings in that I'll do some crying No you can't do one of them I'll just cry that while having so long a time

You're too anxious to do one of them. You'd break down. It would break us. I get off at them all the time. I'm all right. I'm a comedian. I don't want to come on and cry about stuff. If you want to do that, that's fine.

I don't fancy it. I don't fancy it. I don't want me crying in the shower, so you kind of see my dearest. So I'll win. Bye.