Sh**ged Married Annoyed - Whatsapp Groups Revealed And Rosie Goes To See Five

Episode Date: January 11, 2026

There is lots to be discussed on this week's Shagged Married Annoyed! Chris has been impressing Rosie's family with some basic DIY (and a trip to the shops), Rosie goes to see Five and has some beef with their security guard, whatsapp group names are revealed and they don't show anyone in a good light! All of this plus some tasty beefs and some great QFTP's involving a one hour developing service, some icky future planning and second hand mouthwash. If you would like to send a weird and wonderful story to Chris and Rosie, email [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey Slags, coming on... Coming up on this week's episode of Shackerman Anoye. Oh, we talk about wallpaper. Oh, I love wallpaper. You do, of course you do. Any discussion about wallpaper. I'm very happy. Of course.

I'll be honest, we were all over the place. We're talking about so many things this week. We're talking about WhatsApp groups. Yes. You spotted in my phone when you were covertly looking through my phone. You spotted the name of a WhatsApp group. I did. Which I hadn't.

And you called us out on it. Yes. That's not what it seems. But listen, all of that pales and insignificance to the fact that. to the fact that I guessed of Rosie's mystery Oh, how do you do it? Two fold, off the bat,

can't believe I did it, genuinely the highlight in my week. Enjoy. Hello, you are listening and watching Shagmoudinaud with me, Rosie Ramsey and my husband, Christopher Ramsey. Hello, hello! This is a very quick introduction

because I'm currently waiting for a photo to be upload of our bedroom, sorry, wallpapered on chat, JPT. GTP? What, GPT? GPT? I don't know. Oh my God, it looks delicious.

Right, so you're, right, we all know, everyone who's listened, yeah, listen, everyone who's listened before, anyone who's even listened to maybe two episodes, you know that we are both disgust and vile, ludicrous hypocrites. Oh, yeah. No more than, genuinely, Rose, you seem to think it's more than me, but I think it's actually more you. The fact that you have gone on so many rants about how AI is terrified and stuff, but this. Then yesterday, a carpenter told you that you could take a foot. It was literally like you can take a foot with a living room. And if you think you want wood cladden on the ceiling, which is what you wanted, you can get chatchy-chipate to do it.

I didn't know this. That was that. Guys, I'm not kidding. Can I tell you right now? I'm paying £20 a month. Right, yeah, exactly. Right. So that's the thing, right?

Listen to this, right? So I was like, because obviously, cards on the table, we just used it for our children's homework. Oh, I don't. Well, just if I don't know what, like, you know, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, Adverbial or whatever. I'm like, oh, the fuck.

No, I used it before this just to correct my grammar because all my friends are teachers and sometimes on the group chat, I feel pressured. Wow. Because I don't know where to put full stops or, you know, comments.

So what happened was, the carpenter said to us, I was called him a joiner, but he didn't like being called a joiner. He was a carpenter. Apparently like that. Kind of like that. I obviously thought he was going to fight us.

So he said, you can do that. And I went, oh yeah, you've got to sign up to do that. You've got to pay your 20, your money. Not a month, it's a bit steep, but you can't cancel it anytime. But you went, I use it all the time, you don't have to pay it.

And I went no for images and videos you have to. Guys, I am not kidding. I left the room to make a cup of coffee. I came back in. She'd signed up. She'd done her credit card details in. She was in there. She already had a photo of it.

It's the fastest. In your brain works the same as mine. We can't buy train tickets or book hotels online quickly. It's a long drone process because whenever you go to forms and stuff. but when there's a bit of fucking cladden or what does it look like with wall paper on the line you were in there like the Matrix it was insane

it looks so good by the way I'm sick of being shown AI renders of what our room's going to look like although then again I'm also sick of holding up bits of bits of wallpaper and trying to imagine what it looks like so that's actually it is clever it's very clever I'm sure there's probably took a job on someone but yeah it's very clever

Very clever. It's writing books and everything. I'll be doing podcasts soon. Can I just say as well? There's a song on TikTok that's trending but it's an AI song. Well yeah, well I came on stage

of the other night doing me warmups for me stand up to her. I came on stage to a 1950s sole version of Without Me by M&M and it's amazing. And is it AI?

Yes. I'm taken away from the arts though. You shouldn't do that. You're taken away from fucking graphic designers and wallpaper people. Well listen I'm going to cancel it now.

I've got what I need. Right. I'm going to cancel it. Great. Because I don't actually want to take it. I don't like it. Don't tell them. I always say please and thank you.

Do you? Yeah. Could you charge your video? Cool. You've got to. Yeah. Right. Okay.

Listen, this was going to be a quick end. I've actually seen it now. You see now? You're happy with it? It's on Airplane. So if you've decided. No, I'm still undecided. Well, let chat GDP deal with it.

I can't be asked to hear any more about fucking wallpaper. The amount of tiles and wallpaper, where you're getting delivered at this house. Are you under some kind of scam where you're just going to get enough of the testers to build a wallpaper without having to pay for some wallpaper. That could be possible, to be honest with you. Fucking nightmare, honestly.

Anyway, guys, thank you for watching. Thank you for listening. Thank you for being here. Please continue to like, rate, and subscribe. And again, every now and then, I'd just like to say thank you so it doesn't sound like a little bit of a script. Genuinely thank you.

The subscribers are flying up on YouTube and you're still getting the top of the charts every single week in the podcast charts. We can't thank you enough. And without further ado, it's time for this week's. lucrative, lucid sponsor. Brings no money into a family home.

This week's sponsor is, brings joy to the hearts of children everywhere. Brackett's adults. Brackets used to be children, close brackets. This week's sponsor is, might have done it before, not sure I haven't checked, is the unbelievable amounts of dust and detritus that appear the minute you've finished hoovering.

Me specifically. me everyone. What do you mean? What's Trititus? Detritus. Just bits of shit. Is it? I've never ever heard that word in my entire life.

Detritus. Detritus. Detritus. Nice word. Detritus. Okay. It is a nice word. But you've done it again.

Detritus. But you've done it again. So if you just went, yeah, detritus, I'd have continued on. But you've looked at me with such disdain and confusion. Hey, where'd you live? Detritus. Detritus stand up. What's your name?

Randy. It does. It does. Put your hands up for detritus. Put your hands up. I love this city. Did it a little, little, little. Remember that song?

No, if you're not had it. You're literally hoovering. Every single time I hoover, I go fucking wild. I go, I'm done. I pick the hoover up. I take it back. I put it in a little holster. I walk back.

It's fucking shit everywhere. Just detritus everywhere. Does it fall? He has my question. Have I missed it? Or does it fall out of the hoover? I don't know. Maybe you need to change the filter.

Right. No, I haven't got time for that. So we've also got you now. We've got, with the hoover we got, we've got one of the ones where it's the, it's the rollerhead and it's got the laser. So it puts the laser on the floor and it shows you. Never used it.

I had to stop. I put it on for a day once. I was like, I'm going to be here forever. You can see shit you're not supposed to see. Right, well, why? You don't need to see that. I was like, I live here now. This is it.

I'm sure I threw it away. Our house. Our house is really clean. No, it is. It's super clean. Well, I'll tell you when it's it's dirtiest then, just when I've finished hoovering. Because there's fucking shit everywhere.

I don't know what happens. Do you think the hooves fucked? That's what I'm thinking. Right, okay. Yeah. Do you remember back in the olden days? Olden days? Like, because we've got,

now we've got the chock where you put it in its holster, the cordless one. And I know most people have got cordless now. I'm not, not everybody. But do you remember when it was just like the little cord and your mom just literally was seething 24-7 having to rag this hoover round? Yeah.

And I remember having to like lift me legs up for the cord and all that kind of stuff. Like, I remember. Genuinely being terrified When making the move to cordless I remember being genuinely terrified I was in the shop for ages Yeah

I was in the shop for ages Stand there with the staff in my going Well I just don't know When there's no cord What'll I do? And he's like you fucking walk wherever you want It's amazing And the battery does last for age

Here's a thing I might have to check before we put this out That he's okay with it But I was talking a friend of the podcast Carl Hutchinson on the phone All right When are you not talking on the phone Every day twice a day

You speak to your friends So much more Every day, twice a day Main Call School run? School run and both, yeah, school run, there and back. What's annoying is his school run finishes slightly after mine, so I'm on the way back from the school run,

and I ring him and he can't pick up because he's too busy. And he rings me and I'm like, I'm back in the house now. Like, this is my time now. Yeah, first world problems. Anyway, he said to me that his wife either never charges the Hoover or she puts the battery somewhere that he can't find it when it's charging or something. Okay. So in an unbelievable...

Is he not got it on the wall? No, I don't think so. so in an unbelievable, incredible act of pettiness, I swear, and I'll have to check, this is okay for us to tell you. He has bought his own hoover. What do you mean? So in his house now, in his house now,

there's her hoover and there's his hoover. Stop it. Well, because she doesn't, I mean, listen, I'm, yeah, I get it. I get it. I get it. A man's a mad, man. No, I get, that would infuriate me. Yeah.

Well, you never wipe down the benches. It's a sit, like. Oh, do you want your own bench like? No, I just drives it. is mad like you never wiped down the benches you can just work like everyone's get oh by the way oh any no

what just my mom and me auntie absolutely you put three pictures up yesterday yeah right and I think you only do it when they're there you only do stuff when people are there so that when you left my mom was like he is he is fantastic he is and I'm like

he's only done it because you're here I've actually been asking those pictures I've had to I've had those frames for a year. First of all, this sums up your negative attitude in the way you are constantly playing down my achievements. It was four pictures. In your head, in your disgusting head, right? It was four pictures.

And a court hook, right? Which you put up, how many inches? Two inches higher than I should have been. Two inches higher than I said. Because I stood and I went and you said, where'd you want it? And I said, right, well, obviously, I'm going to be, you're a bit taller than me,

but I'm me and the kids are going to use it. So I just, I didn't even stretch far. I just sort of put my hand up and I went, there. That's where I want the bottom. So I'll tell you exactly what happened. It's that long. It's such a long coat hook. It's like a big long wooden thing.

And what I did was I picked the middle point and then I pick each side point and I had accidentally, it was wonky. And what I've done is I've leveled it up higher, on the high end. I'm very sorry. I think somewhere deep in your consciousness, consciousness, you've gone,

fuck her, fuck the kids. I'm putting this up to my level. Oh yeah, because I definitely want more things to do. I definitely want, Dad, can you pass me code? Chris, can you get this code down? I want that added on to me list of shit. Get used to it because I can't reach? Listen, let's stop this.

Can we just go back to how amazing your mom and anything? Your mom and that, but actually, can I just say, I mean, I love my dad. Yeah. I don't want to, I'm not saying anything. That he didn't do much back in the day. He didn't do much DIY and stuff. No, and I don't think that's husband did that. I don't think, and listen, are they still together?

Can I be honest with you? Can I be honest with you? So I'm not great. Everyone listening, I'm not amazing at DIY. You know, I can do the basic things. I can't do any plum and I can't do any electrics. I wouldn't do, but I can do put shelves up and put it. You're really good at putting pictures up.

Now, what I'm, yes, the one thing I am really good at, and I do the maths on it and everything. Put all of these up. Yeah, so if you need, if you've got a long space and you've got six pictures, I can get them equally distant and level, bang, bang, bang. You are good at that. You will not be surprised when I tell you this. I did them yesterday specifically, as I'm doing them,

I was so excited to shout you and your anti-cath and your mom into the room because I knew how buzzing they'd be when I did it. Yeah, I know. I told me that's what I mean. I've done it in the both, but hey, aren't you fantastic? I just stand there going, fucking right, I am. And then they just look at me like an absolute piece of shit.

And I'm like, what do you do? And then, oh God, and then you went to the shops. You went to the shops and that was, and they were like, and he's going to the super. My God, and he's going to the supermarket. What a guy. And I'm just like, are you, you too? There goes my hero.

I'm sorry, but the couple of dinosaurs got married, when did they get married? The 70s? So, yeah, so that just... World's different now. Right, so all that does, exactly. I'm not brilliant by any strict of foundations. The level of, I think, husband and father has just leveled up like fuck since back then. I'm sorry, I am not impressed that you went to the supermarket to buy food for our family.

but what I did have to add when they were like he's gone to the supermarket I was like yeah you'll not buy any any meals right like you don't go at the supermarket

and think right I'll get that ingredient that ingredient you just go and you just get like milk and eggs and bread yeah which are ingredients

yeah we'll have an eggy bread yeah I haven't had eggy bread for ages I love eggy bread is like because eggs make you shit your pants oh yeah no not hard boiled eggs

I've just learnt now I'm really Ship me pants again the other day though What would what I had then? It was egg again, I don't know what you'd do. No, it was something else and I just thought yeah, I can't live. I've definitely got obvious. You need an intolerance test. You're intolerant something.

Again, I know why you won't because you'll find out it's something you love. Speaking of stuff you love. I think it was red wine. Oh God, really. Oh, absolutely not. It's not with the festivities. I don't want to know.

I'll just shit my pants. You guys have a little napie? A little Christmas napi. Huh? Hey, listen, there's a Poonami at Christmas. Yes. It's where new children's book is out now and maybe mommy might chat a pans at the end

if she has a glass of mulled wine or a hard boiled egg we're both pointing out on the white shot there there it is it's very good Santa's very cute it's actually so if I gave you a runny soft boiled egg and a big glass of red wine you'd explode I think so that's how I'll die Elise Navidad

We had a fight about the jingle We couldn't set a lawn a jingle Jingle So this is the jingle Jingle Jingle We hope you like the jingle Jingle Jingle Babadoo Babadoo Babadoo Babadoo babadoo babadoo

Bhabadu bao Jingle Hello and welcome back to Shagmarydenoid So it is that time of year Everyone's ill Everyone's ill Including our youngest Rafe

Who is... He's not ill He's just got a bit of a cold Listen he's still fine to go to school He's not that bad He's just got a bit of a cough And the sniffles But he was running around

make these he's fine but in the middle of the night he crept in our bed last night and I don't think you heard this uh in the middle of the night he was inches like on me face right not even inches away he was on my face now must have been so so fast to sleep that I didn't realize and then I just remember being woke up by this into my mouth into my actual mouth and I feel a little bit I don't think he noticed because he didn't wake up, but I hide him off of him. And I was like, no, God. I just, I really can't be. I've dealt-old all the remote controls.

I've dealt-old all the doors. Everything that he's touched has had dead-all. Other antibacterial sprays and wipes are available. Yeah, I put all the cushions outside for a while because I saw a video once upon a time saying... That's upsetting, by the way. I don't like it, like you started doing that. It's fucking snowing outside, and I went into the bedroom,

and all the windows were open. You've got to get that air out. I'm not kidding. I got a shock. Like, I got a fright. I heard you go into the room and go, oh. It was horrible.

Like, it was actually like, it was like walking into something. It was the best way in the square. I was like walking into a glass door. It was bastard freezing in it. Yeah, no, I've saw a video. I'm not even going to see it. I didn't read it.

No one told us. I saw a video. And I think it's in, where do they let the kids to nap outside? Oh, like Scandinavian countries. Like cold countries, they let the kids in the snow, which I think is, we used to do that with Robin, remember? Let him nap outside.

Let him nap outside. It's really good for them, apparently. Yeah, it's really good. Sleeping in a cold room's good for you, apparently. Yes, yes. But then I saw as well that you've got to open the windows for like 20 minutes a day, even in the winter, get all of the crappy, horrible, mangy air out

and put your pillows outside. And not so much your bedding. It just gets rid of stuff. I do believe this entire thing was written by a, a gang of pillow thieves. And I do believe they are, they're on there. So it'll not be the scrap men coming over. Do you not just think like...

Don't get it. I like fresh air coming in the room. It's quite nice. And I get it. I sort of get this one. I understand that maybe you're letting the stale air blow out fair enough. But do you not just think like, if you did every bit of shit

that someone online told you to do, you would have no time in your day. eating grapes anymore. No, but you know what I mean? Yeah, but it's that. It's fucking everything. It's like, not two seconds. Can I just whinge?

It's, open your windows, do this. Oh, get up early. Read the passage of a book. Oh, journal. Oh, meditate. Oh, stretch. Oh, hang. Hang.

That's a new one. Hang. Find something and I fucking go in the loft and just hang on something with your hands and decompress your back. Do you know what it is, though? You've got to only take from it. What you want. I'll hear something, right?

Yeah. How about, you know, I be not. watching a lot of videos recently about like um how food's got loads of pesticides on it and shit right okay do you know what it is though i mean yes and no because obviously it's nice to eat food but i looked on all the packaging the other day and oranges and there is stuff on them and you're like right okay but then i had a cauliflower and i looked on the i looked on the ingredients and it just said cauliflower because that is to this time of year it's a root vegetable isn't it right i think it just said cauliflower? Oh god, maybe I'm wrong. But anyway, I was like, well, why don't we just go back old

school and stick to the seasonal veg and fruit? So without getting too sort of boring and hard-hitting, there'd be two good things for that because then shit wouldn't have to be flown all over the world. Yeah. So sometimes if you're going, you're going to get strawberries or whatever or something in the supermarket now and it'll say it's from fucking Malta or something. Because they're like, well, of course, because they're not grown here. So I don't know. But, But that is, I think nowadays as well. Everything's too available. Everything's too ready.

You're ready. You just go in the supermarket and you go, I want a fucking guava. You know, they don't even grow here, but I'll just have that. Yeah. Guava is a thing in it.

I've said it now. Yeah, isn't it like your fruit? You know what I mean? I want a star fruit. I want a fucking passion fruit. I want this, I want that. You can get it whenever you want.

You can buy them on fucking boxing day. Yeah. It is what it is. Yeah. And you'd have to then dial all that back. We've gone too far. You'd have to dial all that back. enough to go to all them supermarkets.

Oh, by the way, you can't sell any of that shit now. So there's a footloadier profit gone. Yeah. Yeah. And the Bayne loves eating grape. God, that. He loves his grapes this time of, yeah. Sorry, Rayf's going to turn into a grape.

Yeah. Little Gilbert grape. Which is always fun because you just can't leave the room ever. Terrifying. Absolutely terrifying. Again, until I had kids, I didn't realize grapes are the most dangerous thing in the whole fucking world. I know. Everything's dangerous.

But yeah, so, is cauliflower a root badge? We'll find out. Come back. Come back after this. They'll go on the floor. They'll go on the floor. They'll find out. I'm sure they're on like a

it almost looks like a big fucked up asparagus Oh yeah And it's just got bitter cut, I'm sure I love cauliflower I think it's my new favourite veg Collifour rice is upsetting Oh no it's lovely No I'm not having it

I'm not having it It's not rice It's not a root veg It's a flower Oh wow Flower Colliflower It was it really had

Yeah That's embarrassing Welcome to The Morons Live The Levin people listening They're going Are you two out of your fucking minds? Probably, probably.

All right, what are you going to do? Apology to all the farmers out there. He don't even know they've... That's him taking his headphone out. Love the farmers. Great. What? Are there any downsides to eat cauliflower?

Oh, God. One of the biggest issues is gastrointestinal distress, gas and bloating. How often are you eating cauliflower? Quite often. All you're around? Recently. So, we've got to be carefully, yeah? What?

Well, what accounts for the years and years of bloating that you've had beforehand? Oh, okay. They were back to it. You've got an intolerance. It's eggs, isn't it? It's eggs, it's eggs? It's eggs? I hope it's something like crisps.

Oh, you'd love that, wouldn't you? Yeah, I would love that. Why? I'll tell you why, because I was going to the supermarket yesterday, do my shop because I'm a great man, just a great guy, put the pictures up, but I went to the supermarket. Is there anything this guy can't do? Wet floor sign for my mom and anything.

You're going to the fucking supermarket. And I was... What they didn't know is I had to write your list though. I was in the... Well, I was at... Crisps, Ron. Your mom and you stood there and your mom went,

get some crisps. And you went, No, don't get any crisps. And she went, get some crisps. I'm here. I'm here. I like crisps.

Because as you said, your mom doesn't... She thinks eating crisps doesn't count when it's at someone else's house. Yeah. Yeah. And you were like,

no, I can't have crisps in the house. I can't have them. So there was this argument between... And then you gave in and went, okay, get some crisps. And I was in the crisp aisle, and I was on the phone to call. And I said to him, I went, I'm in a really weird position here made, because I'm about to buy some crisps. And I'm looking around.

And I'm, no matter what I do here, I'm getting bollocked. Because if I buy the wrong crisps, you did buy the wrong crisps. There it is. I'm getting bollocked. But then if I do buy crisps and they're the right crisps and she eats the crisps, I can't win. I ate the crisps. You, fuck you. You opened the cupboard yesterday.

You show the crisps at us and you went, why did you buy it? these and I said the last conversation we had was the words were crisp buy some crisps. I'm sorry. I'm hard to be my I know. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. But I just want to be skinny

and I love crisps so I don't know what to tell you. You don't want to be skinny. You look fantastic. I want to be rake thin. You'll never be. I know. You will never be skinny. I know. You are beautiful. You're a fantastic shape. Pack it in.

But honestly, stop eating as many crisps because there's never any left for me. Fida. That's what feeder says. Just start dipping your crisps in butter because I've heard it keeps the ghosts away. Oh, butter would do need butter. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo. It's the golden moment. Triumph on the podium, golden hand.

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Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadu, bah. Now, Rosie, as you know, I was in the war zone last night with the lads. Oh, no. No. No, you weren't in the war zone. I was in the war zone. You weren't in the war zone because I, okay. Is it a beef? No, okay.

We just recorded a video for TV licensing. They're having a little Christmas day, I think, doing a children-in-need-quiz. We just did a video on your phone. I edited it and you went, can you send it to Leo, manager? I went, yeah, no bother. I went on the WhatsApp groups and I saw that it's the name of the group. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, I was going to tell you that. Yeah, did you know what the right?

Okay, so that's what this is about. Oh, yeah, I already know. Right, no, no, but that's one bit, right. I was going to bring it up later. All right, go on then. Tell everyone what the name of the group is. One, looking through my phone, awful. Come on then.

Well, I just saw a group with a man with a monkey mask on. Yeah. Called Hozone. Ho's own. So just for a laugh. I added the lads of the group. This is four we play it. And I thought, what can I call the group?

And I didn't want to call it like cod boys or like cod lads or warzone lads. So I just called it Horzone because I just thought it was a funny little play on words. So I was in the warzone. Obviously, you knew who you married. I'm going to call it. guy. I always have been a call of duty guy. Yeah, but you have stuck true to call a duty. Yeah. So, um, two things, right?

So I call it Hawesone. So you're obviously a member of... Is there any haws in it? Just the three lads I play with. No, I meant on the game. No, it's just a game. It's like, you know, it's a lot like Fortnite. You drop into this big map and you all fight. Um, and we've got my headsets on and... Oh, God, I know.

I know. It's horrible. I look through the window the other night. Is it last night you were on there in the Hawesown? Yeah. and I look through when you're just sat, just like a foot away from the telly with your little headset on. Pulled the sofa right across the room.

Yeah. Right. Because I'll be honest way. I used to build a sit leaning on the edge of the sofa with no back support and play on my computer. I'm 39 now.

You know, there's a few miles on the clock. If I lean forward, both my hands go numb. So I had to pull the sofa right across the floor. I think I've damaged the wooden floor, big marks on the wooden floor. Brilliant. Had to pull the sofa all the way across

so I can sit there. Have you actually? Just for sniping. I don't know, I'll have a check. I might just leave it in the middle of the room. just for sniping because I need to see If you have damaged that floor I'll be absolutely raging

Rosie people could have died I saved lives So we've got to You're gonna hate this so much So there's a thing on Call of Duty called a clan tag So you have your name On the game

Which I can't say Because everyone will people will try and add us But no offence I just don't want loads of people on my friends list I've only got me two, three mates So there's a clan tag at the beginning which is like a collection of letters so you all can put that at the beginning

so you know you're all on the same team vile right so ours is A-W-T-L Do you know what that stands for? No I can't believe I've telling you that

it stands for aren't we the lads Oh God I hate it. So Jonathan, my friend, your friend, Steph's husband, came on with us last night. So me and Jordan and Sean have on with the lads,

but Jonathan didn't have that. And I said, Jonathan, if you're going to come in the war zone with, but why don't you change your thing? They aren't with the lads. And he was like, oh, no, I don't do that. I don't do that. And I was like, no, come on, just change it. And he went, quite honestly,

he went, no, because when I play with me other mates, I'll have to change it back to nothing because they'll be like, what's that? Right. Right. And I went, okay. And then he went, have I ever told you about, this and he told me that

he was out with one of his mates once with all of his mates you know a lot of groups of mates and people listen you'll refer to yourselves as the lads um his mate was on a WhatsApp group while he was with them and he was texting on his phone and he was in another WhatsApp group with another group of mates do you know what the name of the WhatsApp group was

I don't the real lads oh can you imagine oh that's horrible That was fucking creased what he told us. So he had a better set of friends. But his other friends saw it.

They went, hey, hey, like in the pub, like pints down. Like, hey, what, show with that phone? What's that? And literally, apparently the cross-examined them were like, who the fuck are these? That's terrible. Oh, it's just me other mate. And he's going, I didn't name the group that.

I didn't, apparently says they're still not over it. I would, I'd possibly fall out with people over there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow, that's bad. The real lads. The real lads. Honestly, I would. I don't think I'd be.

I don't think I'd bet your friend anymore. You sometimes have to take modern day things into account. I know it's just WhatsApp group name but it's actually really important. It means a lot. It does mean a lot. You know what it is?

I thought you'd think that was stupid. I'm glad you're on board. No, I agree. I'd be, oh, God, what? If my best mate's Angela and Steph had a different group being like, the real friends, I'd cry. So just with this whole

doing online games, I'm absolutely fine with it. I love spending time apart or night time. It's great. Can you just not be so desperate to go all the time? because that's your upsetting. Listen.

No, that's upset. Because the kids aren't even fully in bed and you're like, I've got it, I've got to, I've got to, I've got to get on with the lads. I don't like, it's just really, it's not, it's not cool. When the siren calls and the bombs are dropping and I'm needed in the war zone on the front line, there'll be no time for bedtime.

This is, this is me training, right? Ask us how many times we've won last night? How many times? Twice. Okay. All right. Well, do you know why? Because we are the lads.

You are the lads. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, ba. I went to see five the other night. You did. At the Newcastle Arena. It was absolutely class. Such a good show. All five of them?

All five of them? All five of them. And also singing live. Honestly, fair play. Unbelievable. Yeah. It was a really good night. We were meant to meet them beforehand

because they got in touch, which was meant. So cool. Like a little bit unbelievable. Like 15-year-old me would be. die. Yeah, yeah. Well, I meant to go meet them beforehand. I told all my friends, and then I got a message very later on saying,

just me and one person can go. And I was like, I can't. Like, I couldn't just pick one person. So we didn't end up meeting them. Right. But I haven't told you this. And I'm a little bit, like, mortified, right? Cards on the table, yeah, just went in between bits there.

When you hear babbado, babu, bab, bab, and there's an ad on or whatever. I'm busy exporting the files, and we're working out what our next little section to talk about and Rosie's exact words were, I don't know if I want to tell you this story. So I'm very excited. It's like, it's not that bad, but it's just embarrassing. So anyway, just reminds us like,

no, I don't know. Anyway, so what happened was, when we were meant to meet them backstage, just one of when I said no. Dan, our PR, sent me the security guard's number being like, ring this guy, when you're ready to go, he'll come and meet you. So I was six or seven wives.

in at the end of the night. Oh, Christ. At the end of the night. At the end of the night. They've just done a full arena show and you're bothering. Guys, Scott, I know you listen as well. Oh no, I message Scott. I haven't heard back from him.

But that's fine. He's busy. No, I'd watch them. They were great and I was pissed. And actually, I blame Angela. Because I was pissed and I went, I went Angela. And Angela's quite, she's always really like much more level-headed than me and Steph she's sort of like

tell says no don't do that like me and Steph have got herself into really bad situations in the past and she always says if you'd have listened to us that wouldn't have happened and I'm like fair enough I said to her should I text the security guard and just be like

can we come and see them and she was like yes I swear I did and what happened he didn't reply oh my God how embarrassing he didn't reply

oh my God he didn't in reply. And so that doesn't even feel better getting out. I actually feel worse. This might get taken out.

No, I'm leaving this in. This is staying in. This is staying in. We're going to clip this up. You know, we'll release different clips from the episode each week. We're just going to release this three times.

Well, do you know what it is? You fucking lose that. No, I was 15 again. I was 15 again and 5 were on stage. I don't think you understand how much I loved 5 as a kid. And they were on stage and I got, and I had the number

for the security car and I just thought, fucking Tony, Tony. Tony, well, fuck you, Tony. Dony because you didn't reply I don't give a shit anyway a worst story though a friend of ours

Vicky she went to the Dakota Hotel after and she was in a box in that so she's like quite she's in the music biz so she's always at stuff and that we got off at a box as well

but I said no because I was like I don't know who else is going to be in and we wanted to dance and screaming all that and she was in and I was like I could have anyway she went back to the Dakota Hotel after and she thought Jay was the security card and she said to him way of her and he was like

well I'm one fifth of them yeah she sent to the picture though to be fair he was dressed like a security card but also Jay has had a full glow up he was absolutely drop dead gorgeous they were all lush back in the day weren't there yeah there were always lush but he's like mega lush yeah but I don't think he's got any kids Ah, got a time on his hands. Must be nice.

That's why. Anyway, mint gig, it was class, and I'm really sorry. Also, Tony, fuck you, but I am sorry that I text you. You could have just thumbed, you could have just replied saying, Thumbs down. Thumbs down. I don't love that. Just nothing.

No, N and loads of oz. Just no. Yeah. So, yeah, there you go. I think, you know what it is? I wish you'd wrote, I wish he'd written. I wish you'd replied, I wish you'd written. No.

Get home to you. kids. Yeah. Yeah. That would, yeah. Dory, Dory. I bet he's sick. I bet he gets loads of shit up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he should, he should have done that. Because you know what? If you replied, no, get home to your kids. You know what that would have been? It would have been a slam dunk, defunct. It's time for what's your beef. What's your beef? What's your beef? Everybody get up singing, what your beef now. Father will make you get. Thank you.

Cool. So bring on the beef. You or me? Who wants to go first? Oh, let me see. Let me see. You go first. Right. Mine's very... You... You're disgusting things that you do. So, you know, back in the day, we all know, recap for anyone who doesn't know,

because you suck all the flavour off the crisps and leave the crisps on a plate. I haven't seen you done for a long time. Well, because I don't eat as many crisps. Right, okay. My metabolism is not what it was, Chris, when I met you. So you've moved off... I eat very little now.

You've moved around to popcorn. Oh, yeah, do I have popcorn. We're going through a popcorn. popcorn phase at the minute in the house. Is that bad? Yeah, because of what you do. The other night, you think I haven't seen it, but I saw it. The other night you were sitting on the sofa and the arm of the sofa, you had your

phone and in front of you, you had your ball of popcorn. And you know, guys, when you eat popcorn, sometimes you get one of the little hard kernel bits. Yeah. Which you could choke on. Yeah. You were discarding them, quite rightly. You were spitting them into your fingers and you were lining them up on your phone. Right.

It was fucking disgusting Why is that disgusting? Because I looked at your phone screen Which you touch and thumb all day And there was about six or seven little Solid kernels of popcorn Look like you were They looked like the pellets that you put in a catapult

You know like you are firing pellets off To what upset you most That I didn't eat them or that I put them on my phone That you put them on your phone In some kind of little display It's just disgusting It's a little plate

It's just disgusting And what I had to do was Because then you were like you went to bed And I just had to get No no what you did it Did you do it? In the wine glass? Yeah, you funneled them into a wine glass.

Then I had to wash that wine glass the next day. I tell you right now, you didn't because I did. I had to look at that dirty wine glass all the next morning. Yeah. Because there you go. There lies the other beef. Chris does not wash wine glasses or bottles. No.

You just leave them on a little collection on the side. But you know what you do? You twist everything far too hard and far too tight. So then they just get left because I can't actually open them. You knew when we got married to that I was an exceptionally strong. athletic individual. No. I think you just do it. You do it just to assert your sort of manhood.

No, that's awful. I do it because the drip, the bottles drip. So I tighten them on. Don't drip when I do. Listen, stop leaving... Sissie beef. The utility door open when you're frying food because the clothes stink that are drying in that other room.

Stop it. Stop it now. And keep telling you all the time and you stop doing it. By the way, we're just... just bought a dehumidifier. It's incredible. I didn't know how much moisture there was in our air. Gallons of the stuff. Oh my God.

Galans, especially when you're drying clothes. Yeah, guys, if you haven't got a dehumidifier, you need to invest in one. It was about 110 quid. So they're not like crazy. You get them cheap, but I went on which. I researched it, did you? I did a bit of research, the sand writing is.

Get what you pay for? So good. But then, like, by the end of, maybe it's like a day and a half if you've had it on, it's like needs emptying and there's just so much. How many pints of water would you say? There's easily about eight pints of water at the end of the day. It's madness.

Yeah. And it sucks. They don't use pints anymore. Everyone listening knows what a pint looks like. Maybe it's a seat in the glass now. You said how a robin. What's a pint? What you're talking about?

We're working mills, bitch. Oh, yeah. Or what is it? I don't know. He doesn't know the measurement of anything unless it's got six, seven in it. and then he's fucking lose his mind. No, he's gone off 6'7. Great. You can't keep up, can you?

No. I nearly bought my Christmas drum where I was 6-7 on. I think if I'd give him it, he'd vomit on him and be like, this is so uncool now. Sorry, that was cool for five minutes. I've had enough, I've had enough. But the dehumidifier pulls all the water, the moisture out of the air, dries the clothes quicker. It's unbelievable.

It does. It does. Unbelievable. Where has it been on me life? How much water have I been breathing in over the years? I know. I might as well have been swimming. I know. Am I have got gills?

Babadoo, babadoo, babadu, babadu, bah. On game day, pain can hit hard and fast, like the headache you get when your favorite team and your fantasy team both lose. When pain comes to play, call an audible with Advil plus acetaminopin and get long-lasting dual-action pain relief for up to eight hours. Tackle your tough pain two ways with Advil plus acetaminephim. Advil, the official pain relief partner of the NFL. Ask your pharmacist at this product's rate for you.

Always read and follow the label. Babadoo, babado, babadoo, babadoo, bah. It's time for questions from the public. Questions from you guys, you're the public. And you send us all your stuff, and we're very, very grateful. We are. And I love you. And you have a tasty muff.

Right. That's, that's, honestly, lost for words. As always, if you want to get in touch at shagmary, an audit at gmail.com, you genuinely threw me off there. Tasty muff, good God. Tasty muff. Muff, I haven't heard that for a while. Muff's awful. Awful word.

Hi, Rosie and Chris. Recent new subscriber to the podcast from W.A. State, USA. What? Found this podcast after enjoying Rosie on Taskmaster. Holy shit, welcome. I was on as well, but no one mentions that anymore. I know. We're just living the present, that's all it is.

We were walking through the busy London streets the other day towards Kings Cross Station and were literally crossing a road and someone risked their life while we were crossing that road, a very busy area, and said to you, I love you on Taskmaster, by the way. And I was standing right next year. You fucking people have got a memory, like goldfish. I just don't know if your season was series even. Was that memorable?

Wow. No, I did actually really enjoy. I did enjoy watching your series. Yours had Jason Manzuka's on as well. So it's been very, it's gone very international. Matthew Bainton message this morning on my group chat. Still going strong. What did your group chat call the real lads?

Aren't we the lads? No, I think it's called. if I've changed it's changed a few times but it's currently called hang on Stevie Martin's tech support forum or something right I don't know I honestly don't know why and it's a where is it I think it's a picture of Stevie I think Stevie runs it basically she's in charge of it

right oh no it's a picture of James B right right oh because they said they were friends with James B right yeah yeah right listen back to this. This person who is a fan of Taskmaster, thank you very much. From America. They are burning, yeah, it's really opened up to the USA audiences. And I think that, I think Jason helped with that a lot.

Jason Manzuke. And I hope you can all understand the accents, so thank you very much. It's a great show. It's a very good job. I meant hours. I meant if you're listening to this now because of that, then I won't understand our accents. Maybe, who knows. So they're burning through the back catalogue and really loving it.

So thank you so much. Thanks for putting this out in the world. Oh. Which I didn't really needed. over here. I was just listening to a letter about erotic photos showing up on found film.

Do you remember last week? Yes. We were chatting about the dog. The Poohad dog in the middle of that three which he never asked to be a part of. I didn't. Never consented.

No. Awful. It's just a photo by the way if you're listening to this without any context. Yeah, the dog did not. There was no beastiality. Wasn't in it, wasn't it?

Wasn't it? Beastiality, man. Stop it. Stop it. Just keep going. Just read, keep reading before you. No, you're in it. I can see it in your eyes.

Stop thinking about that. Just read on. Just read on. You had questions about how photo stores handled erotic images. Yes. Because we were like, what happens? Yes. I've got theories on this anyway.

Okay. I worked in a one-hour photo store. Remember when you get them done an hour? That was good. Hell of a movie, by the way. Have you seen that movie? Robin Williams, one-hour photo. I don't know.

Have that? Fucking good. Get on your list. Get on your list. You had a little blonde hair like Eminem. Get on your list. Is it good? Unreal.

Unreal. Does he catch a paedophile? No, he gets obsessed with his family. Oh. He's doing all their photos. He gets obsessed with them. It's really good. Oh, okay. I need more stuff for the Pelton. Really good. Right, okay. I worked in a one-hour photo store and can tell you how we dealt with it. This is just how they dealt with it, not everybody.

Okay. My store was an independently owned one-hour photo processing place. I worked there for two years during all my holidays home from college. This was back in the late night. be in 80s so we were just being born as photos were printed by the machine we had to quickly look at everyone and check them for colour balance brightness etc

any photos that needed to be redone we coded with the needed change and we sent the negatives back to the person operating the printing machine whenever something naughty was in the photo we send it back to make a copy for us no fucking way I thought I was going to say to send it back oh this is great

every naughty picture was added to a a big draw in a desk in the back office. I can ask, they're gross though. We're talking late 80s, naughty develop film photos. Tell you what, you're fucking, you said muff earlier on. I bet you there was some muff going on there, like.

Wish that was still, like, socially acceptable. Well, big old, big old bushes. Yeah, great. I mean, I suppose it is, but. You want it to be. Each other one. Yeah. What would you say?

I'd say no thank you. That was so sweet. Thank you. I'd say, not for me. Vice versa. Not for me. Not for me.

Vice versa. Vice versa. No. Vice versa. Hairy, big hairy, bushy penis. No, thank you. Not for me. Gross.

We had regular customers. I'd get to know, and it was challenging to pretend I hadn't seen them naked. I remember the attractive, conservatively dressed real estate agent who often brought us film of houses she was selling. One time she had several shots from a beach vacation on a roll of house shots that included one of her

handcuffed to a bed frame, naked next to her girlfriend and a very large dildo on the sheets next to them. Good grief. Who took the photo? A girlfriend. But she's in the photo? No. She's handcuffed to the bed frame. Next to her girlfriend. Oh.

Oh, I don't know who's took the picture. I say, God damn! Oh, there's somebody else in there. Oh, they invented the selfie, so... Oh, they set it up on a tripod with a really long stick. Sorry, if you've got a fucking wind-on camera that needs to be developed. Doink. They invented the selfie stick.

They've invented it. Look at this. Yeah. Another was the kindly older insurance investigator. Lots of photos of damaged cars and aftermaths of kitchen fires. One roll of film at the holidays included a photo of him where an only a smile and a red ribbon tied around his flaccid penis. What a fucking mixed back that is.

Car crash. Oh, just a fender bender there. Oh, blood on that one. Oh, that kitchen. Hope no one died. Oh, there he is with a red ribbon round his cock. Who's he sending that though? Who's he? If he's getting... Don't be getting that mixed up in a work capacity, by the way. Sending that off to their fucking insurance company. I know.

The dicey, this is like... Yeah, but that's the thing in it. It's all they had, though. So, that's the thing. At the time of whatever the... whatever the technology is at the time, you just trust it and take it for granted. You don't remember when Snapchat randomly put a tweet out saying,

you know we see all of your snaps. Oh yeah. But Chris, pervert's got a purve. Pervert's got a purve. Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, babadoo. Hi, Ramsey's. Longtime listener, first time emailer. I've wanted to tell you guys this story for years now.

Oh! As I think Chris will certainly have something to say about it. I've got something to say about everything. Yes. Yes, he does. I do, but don't ever take it as gospel. Don't ever take it as an actual fact. and honestly if it's my opinion

it could change tomorrow so good luck depending on what video he watches or who he talks to oh my god I've just had a random I forgot to tell you this sorry this morning I dropped our kids off at school

and I drive past another couple of schools on the way and I was driving along and I saw a really lovely sight I saw what must be a teacher who's a young fellow he's probably a bit younger than me right

I knew he was teacher a because of what he was carrying but B had like a land yard on and he was just walking in he looked like he was, you know, definitely a member of staff. Okay. He had under one arm and props to him. He had under one arm.

No, stop it. Massive bag of sweets. Right. And in the other arm, not in a bag, like a wheel of fortune. Wheel. Right. With loads of different colours and words on it.

Like you spin. Right. And he was walking into the school. And I thought, someone is going to have a bloody good lesson today. I know it's really, I wanted to wide the window down and go, good for you.

those who can teach Yes Honestly I don't think that's the same Those who can teach It's literally the same off the adverts Oh I don't know

You've done it again It is those who can teach Right I just thought it was those who can't teach Why would that be the advert for getting teachers Why would that That Hey hey no right Eh

Not a part of that West End musical you wanted Not a movie star yet Nah, given up? Well, those who can't teach. No. Okay, well, it's those who can teach. Fucking dick. I just thought you looked really good,

walking him with Tom Baller and that. I thought, what a guy. He's really putting something into this lesson. Good for him. I think that's great. Yeah. You're right. Some of them kids are going to have a really lovely day today.

Some of them, not so much. Do you remember when you didn't win it, stuff at school? God, I was devastated. Absolute dog shit. The whole day ruined. There was always the same people. Yeah, all they're always.

the same one's one fixed um right part back to the story sorry part of me worries he will find some way to respect this dickhead of an ex that can happen i can respect people for being bastards for this but i'm relying on you rosy to find it as much of an ick as i did i've got your back sister all right i will a couple of years ago i was dating one of your classic skinny white worships the red hot chili peppers guitar boy types i think that was you I have, fuck you, I've never heard that, that kind of summarisation of a person. It's true though, I can see him. That's really good.

I can literally see him. Yeah. That's what, when we went to college, that's what you look like. Right. Don't you think? Yeah. Cod's on the table. T-shirt, leather jacket jeans, tight jeans, far too tight.

Yeah. And them horrible white army trainers that were like 12 quid from the army store. Six quid. Six, God, even worse. So this is this guy, all right? Yeah. And we were at his house listening to a record. I'm just going to see a record.

A record. A record. Cod on the table. table, I only had red hot chili prep as greatest hits. Okay. I'm that guy. I'm that guy. Weren't a true fan. I'm that guy. Favorite album? Greatest hits.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was the lockdown. So there was very little we could do and even going over at his house was breaking the bubble code of conduct. Oh, fuck of that. Do you remember? Oh, God. What a horrible fucking, what a horrible time to be alive. Fucking horrible. Absolutely vile.

Yeah. The record finished and he asked me to change it. So I got up and asked where kept his collection. Listen to records, that's pretty cool. He said the top right draw of his dresser.

Stupid place to keep them, if you ask me, because you can barely get your hand into one of these as they filled the full draw. Maybe in the right old age of 18 and still not knowing my left from right opened the left hand draw.

And to my surprise, I found a drawer full of mystery. Okay. Full of. It's not used condoms. It's not that bad. No, come on.

Been there, done that. Right. Full of. He's kept... Right, so the fact that just thinks I can think he's a legend, he's kept something. I don't think you're going to think he's a legend, personally. Right.

But he's, so he's kept... Am I right, am I along the right lines of thinking he's kept something of numerous things of something? It's a collection of something. Like bottle tops off every beer he's hat. or something like, have I got it? Have I got it?

Are you taking the piss? Shut up, man. Did I get it? Did I get it? Is that it? That's, what the hell? Yes! Legend.

Are you forever read this? No. Okay. Is that it? Is that where he's gone? No. Yeah, it is, yeah. But listen to why.

Right. You deserve a medal if you guessed it right. Medal. You're so, why do you do these things? Because I'm fucking weird. No, no, yeah. But I found a draw. full, capital letters, and I mean literally full to the brim

with at least three or four, with at least three or four hundred bottle caps. From all different types of drinks, JTOOs, logger, coke, everything. I asked him why on earth he had so many bottle caps to which he responded with all the nonchalance of some sort of dystopian... Give us a check of... Wait, wait, I'm about to tell you why. In case it becomes currency in the future because of the game fallout. Oh, is that what it is? Am I right?

because when the apocalypse happens they'll be used as currency Ah Was this me? That's the kind of thing I would do Well she knew that you would respect this Oh listen that's no me Better than you know me

I'm sorry but that is vile Can I get this guy's number I think would be mates Although he was only 18 in the lockdown one He might be all over now Right I don't know who hurt this man To make him think of this shit

That's why he's just played on follow. I had so many questions, but didn't ask a single one. Nor did he say anything else about them. I shut the draw and put the Beatles on. I really should have asked how they be used as currency, blah, blah, the thing that I like to take from this, which she has spotted as well, she said, let's not also not forget his use of the words, when the apocalypse happens, not if. Yeah, yeah.

So there you go. Honestly, cards on the table, big fan of this guy. Big fan of this guy. He's a thinker. He's a musician, you know. He's an artist. He's a forward planner. Yeah.

You know, he's a catastrophizer. Honestly, he might be my soul, mate. Do you keep bottle taps? No, but there was so, that, like, what's hilarious, not hilarious, what's, what's interesting about that is, there could be, because that's all money is. It's a representation of a good or a service. But where's money?

I don't think money's going to disappear, though. Well, it goes, like, so it doesn't, in the game, I remember, I remember being in the, so in the game, Fallout, you can follow, Is it three? Follow three. You find bottle caps. Yeah, so you find bottle caps. You find old money.

You do find all money. It's worth fuck all. Because everyone's decided. Bottles are currency. We could now decide headphones are currency. Fucking amount of podcasts are they are. Headphones could be currency. If everyone decides the thing is the currency,

it's the currency. In water world, it's earth. You can get money for earth if you've found earth. Haven't seen that for a long time. He's cheating. He's got gills. He swims to the bottom and just gets sand and dries it out.

The guy thinks it's earth. Sorry, spoiler alert. Kevin Costner's got gills in Waterworld. Oh, I can't remember it. All right. Mutation! I think that's why it was such a flop because... Was it a flop?

Huge flop. He put his own money behind it as well. Oh. Yeah. He basically decided that evolution takes a couple of days. Right. Everything's flooded. Hold on.

All right, there's my gills grown. I just pushed them out. Yeah. I mean, nowadays that would probably... probably work though with all the shit that way you would. No? No. It takes millions of years.

To grow girls would take forever. That was from Holly, by the way. Thank you, Holly. Thank you, Holly. And when your podcast comes and you go crawling back to that lad, don't say I didn't told you so. Yeah.

Oh my God, please. Oh my God, I remember that he had loads of these. I need some J2O bottle caps for her fucking... Babadoo, babadoo, babadoo, bab. Hello, Chris and Rosie. Just listen to episode 329 where Chris got annoyed on holiday

when he couldn't pass on the giant inflatable donut reminded me of my recent holiday to Croatia. Okay. We stayed in a lovely hotel in northern Croatia. Bonus, no kids. Ours are both over 18, so now they get left at home. Enjoy. Enjoy.

Wow. There was a small room in the reception area where he could leave things to share with others after you no longer needed them. I love this. Oh, yeah, yeah. You know that way. So there was...

Look, that's why I'm full. from. That's why when this guy, I don't know where he was from, but it was that kind of meh, meh, meh. He was just, and he just went, he was on the phone, meh, yeah, and that's right. You are very upset. I was very upset. I should have, what I should have done is I should have picked up the donut and put it on him like a cartoon and then rolled him into the pool. Yeah. I'm surprised he didn't, because you're one and people away. You keep you cool for a long time and then something just flip. I'm surprised didn't.

It's something pathetic as well. Yeah. It's always something like that. Anyway. I should just drop them for his kids. That's what I should have done. I thought about this a lot afterwards. I should just went, they're having them. Because they wanted them, didn't they? Yeah, they wanted them and he said no and they went, oh, I should have went, I should have them, I should have them? I should have just drop in the pool

and went, yeah, can't have them. Should I work, kind of? What are you going to do? Again, in his defence, he was on what looked like quite an important phone call and I think he thought I was trying to sell them. Right, because you do look like you work in a hotel.

I do like it. If there's a guy, sell inflatables around the pool, I do actually know why you are really up a height though because the kids wanted to keep them. That's why. Yeah, I won't have the argument of not take an inflatable home, inflatables home every year with your kids

is it's exhausting. Yeah. Every year. We want to go. No, I'm not. We do not have a swimming pool at home. Yeah. It doesn't fit in the fucking bath, you dick.

Like, what would they even do with them? You can't take them to the local. They'd forget about them immediately. They'd forget about them immediately. Yeah, you're not allowed to take them to the pool. No. God, that's, that irritates me, actually. You know what?

And do you know what? All I was doing was, I was passing that problem on that fella and he probably didn't want that problem. It's probably not even his fault. You know what you was in the right? I shouldn't have even been offering them out. Do you know what this is? growth.

This is growth. So in this room, there was things such as books, local maps, sun cream, board games, cards. But there was one thing that I thought was gross. And I would be interested to hear if you two think the same. It has divided opinions in my house. Okay, so just to recap. Don't try and guess. There is a room in the hotel lobby where you can go and drop.

Leave stuff. Yeah. Stuff like that. Right. Books inflameds, bat and ball. Yeah, volleyball. Yeah. Okay.

Fish and rod, net for the kids to go and get the fish out of the thing. There's no kids. Oh, fine. It's glorious. Frisbees? No. Just, adult can't Frisbee? I hate adults I'd have to play with stuff on all day.

Just sit down, drink your drink, read your book and shut the fuck up. Do you want a game? No, I do not want any. I don't want a game. What are you talking about? Got you. You hate games, okay. Especially on holiday, though.

Do you want to, pass Brisbane around? I'm trying to guess what's in this room? Yes. Neil Clip, Buzz. No. You're wrong. Towel. No.

The hotel has enough towels. Cap. No. Sombrero? No, I'm going to tell you, so stop guessing. Swimming shorts. Stop. Stop, because you'll get it. Stop.

Second hand mouthwash. Yeah. Yeah, no, I'm not. Because not everyone uses the cap. I don't use the cap. I just necker like it's a bottle of fucking whiskey. I know. Because I've known people that leave like shampoo and conditioner,

which is great. Yeah, but you haven't had your gob around that. have you? So it says it had clearly been opened and about third of it had gone. Oh, it's still pretty... Take it home!

What's wrong with you? How could you use this without knowing if someone else had spit back in it? Oh, there's 100% residuals in there like 100%. I mean, will the mouthwash kill it? Maybe.

Listen, it was gone a week later so someone took it. All right. And they're dead now. And it killed them. Yeah. Babadoo, babadoo, babo, babo. Thank you so much for listening

and watching this week's episode of Shagged Married As always, it's just bloody lovely to have you here. It is, thank you so, so much. As always, if you like getting touch, it is shagged, Marriedenoid at gmail.com, and please continue, like and rate and subscribe or whatever the fuck goes on on the podcast apps

and subscribe on YouTube. Yes. Have they? What we're on now? I think we're on about 50,000 now. Halfway to that play button that we're going to get. Oh, imagine if we've got in time for Christmas? Never.

Never, that's ever going to happen. Never going to happen. It takes them ages to send it as well. You think they're just waiting. You think someone at YouTube's just waiting. I don't know what. goes on at these big companies. Sitting there like I go,

not yet, not yet, watching it roll up. And post it, post it now. Dropping it at the post by. No chance. Okay. You know. Santa.

Here's hoping. Bye. Bye. Bye.