Should I Delete That? - Em's Mum: 10-time Ironman and Queen of Having a Go

Episode Date: September 17, 2023

Today, we share one of our most highly requested episodes. It’s an interview with Em’s Mum! Having favoured smoking and drinking over exercise her entire life, Francie was given the opportunity to partake in an Ironman and said yes… without knowing what it actually was. An Ironman is a gruelling triathlon that consists of a 2.4-mile swim, a 112-mile bicycle ride and a marathon. Yep, a 26.2 mile run ON TOP of all that. Francie’s can-do attitude and endless hard work pushed her to compete in 10 Ironmans over the course of her 50s. Francie takes us through her extraordinary journey, how she still experiences imposter syndrome and you will see why Em is her number one fan (soon you will be too)!Don't forget to check out The Hags @thehaveagosFollow us on Instagram @shouldideletethatEmail us at [e-mail] by Daisy GrantMusic by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I've just got to watch my, like, the little love of my life just waddling into the sea. I'm at right, we'll see you. All right, can we take this penguin thing, whatever, the little love woodling it? Oh, I would lose my mind. The willowy athlete galloping into the waves. Hello and welcome back to Should I Delete That? I'm M. Clarkson. I'm Alex Lai.

You are what? Alex Lime I don't know what happened I was trying to do a presenter so I don't think it worked I would be inclined to agree I'm Alex Lime I don't know if that's an act

I don't know what's going on Okay Australian but only a little bit Malik's light No okay I'm sorry Make it end I'm sorry Please tell me something good

tell me something good okay tell me something bad anything good or bad or awkward from your week let me just have a thing okay I want to start my awkward hit me the most simple basic

seemingly harmless awkward probably you've ever heard but something that caused me major prolonged embarrassment I was on the train I was in a two and in front of me was a table there was a man sitting on the other side of the table so facing me yeah but I can't see him

obviously because there's why couldn't you see him because there's other people facing my way on the table in front of me see what I mean right I'm in a two yeah and then in front of me is a table oh in front of you is a four is a four table fine sorry sorry in front of me is a table of four yeah Okay, fine. There's a man sitting opposite me. But you couldn't see him because there were the other people in the two in front of you. Right. Fine.

That's part of the ball. I couldn't see him in real life. Oh, you couldn't see him through the window. Our eyes locked in the window and my whole body just like went cold. But then because I knew I shouldn't, I kept looking at him in the window. Forbidden love if you were. No, no, no. It was a 60-year-old man.

There was nothing. romantic, sexual about it, but he couldn't stop either. And I was like, every time, and I'm like, I'm going to have to move my seat. I'm going to have to move. There is something about locking eyes with someone in a reflection or in a mirror. It's intimate. It's so intimate. It's so intimate.

And you can't get away from it. It feels secret. It feels a little sordid. It feels, it feels, it feels sordid. It feels like, yeah, it feels like you two have something that no one else knows about. Yeah, yeah. Another universe. Oh, it's horrible. Horrible.

Wouldn't have he told his wife? Probably. Probably not. Probably didn't mean anything to him. But it meant so much to me. Classic. Oh, God, well, I had a seemingly, I had a classic, awkward, myself. Okay. Okay, right, so I've had a big week.

I went to Downing Street. Yay! Yay! And before I went to Downing Street, I mean, that you're good? Yeah, I guess so. Good. But yeah, before I went to Downing Street, I did Gmb.

Gmb came to the house, which is cool to interview me. Very cool. I know. I mean, yeah, they called and then, and anyway, yeah, so yeah, come over. Come over, guys. So they came over, which was cool. And, well, I mean, a couple of awkwards. So the guy, the cameramanman was really nice.

He's called Paul. And I was holding Arlo and Sarah was behind it. This isn't the awkward, just a fun caveat, just to sort of like butter you up for, like, understanding my relationship with Paul. So, like, I mean, met him. I was holding Arlo and he was like, oh, he's a beautiful girl. Sarah was standing right behind Arlo. No, no, no. And I was like, there was always hearing that, obviously joking that he was talking about Sarah. So Paul was like, oh, oh, what a horribly awkward joke. I was like,

I don't know why I've done that. Sorry, I've put everyone on a weird front. So put everyone weirdly. Anyway, did me interview, super nice guy. Totally realised that I was wearing a white bra under my black top, which I haven't actually watched it back. And I never will because I feel like everybody's going to have seen that. But anyway, so Paul Paul probably saw that and thought this woman's a mess. But I wasn't going to tell me.

Didn't tell me. Anyway, he went to leave the end, to the interview. He walked forwards. Yeah. I now realised to pick up his bag. Yeah. But he stuck his hand out.

To pick up his bag. Fuck off. I was like, that's a tempting little hand. So I plucked myself right in. I gave it a hearty shake. And I said, oh, it's so nice to meet you, Paul.

Now, luckily, the presenter James was very nice because I think he saw what happened and thought I have to help her. So he then gave me his hand and was like very nice to meet you and made it look like it was a deliberate thing. Okay, but is there not something worse

about someone acknowledging your embarrassment and trying to save you? Like that makes me feel even more embarrassed. Laugh at me. Laugh at me. Let's laugh together. Let it be embarrassing. But don't try and save me...

Paul wasn't going to laugh. From my embarrassment. Paul wasn't going to laugh. He just looked a bit surprised and then resigned, if I'm honest. Paul thinks you're so weird. Yeah, Paul's not going to come back to my house. I'm never going back on GMV again.

He's going to be like, no, I've been blacklisted. He's like, that house is fucking weird. She wouldn't know if she was trying to hold my hand all day. Shame on you. The stomach just sank. The second I made contact, I was like, oh, I made a mistake. I hate that so much. Anything bad?

A bad. A bad is I keep seeing TikToks and Instagrams about dogs, which are really getting me at the moment for some reason, and they always keep saying like take your dog with you wherever you go remember they you're their whole world they just want to be with you take them don't go anywhere without them they're so sad look at them when you leave the house anyway just just putting me on this massive guilt trip betty doesn't really like we take her for walks and she goes to daycare in a field that she loves but she doesn't like being in a restaurant she doesn't like she's not that kind of dog no she is not she's not

that kind of dog. She's just really anxious. Anyway, I have been brainwashed by these fucking videos. So I was like, I'm going to take her to this cafe. It's an outside cafe and I'd be be really nice for her with my sister and my nephew, but it'd be really nice for her. She can sniff around and stuff, whatever. And it was so fucking awful. She guarded me the whole time, barked to everyone. And then this little girl tried to come up to her and she was like, ah! Like, she would never bite, luckily. I mean, touch one of my salt. I don't think she'd ever way um and it was so stressful and then she tipped the table over you can whistle incredibly quickly you didn't even stop the bread you just went whistle and just whistled did i yeah that was amazing

touch one whistle you didn't even have to get any in to put me back out you have an excess in there do it again touch run a whistle yes she's so quick that was amazing anyway she turned out the table over she tipped the table over It was a rickety, um, outside park table with a latte on it, my sister's latte. And it went, and I was like, this is why you don't bring her out. Yeah, these TikTok videos don't think to you. It's not making me feel bad. Everything's for you. But then I know she's upset when I leave the house, but I'm like, what can I do?

Stay at home, you selfish, bitch. Have your lattes at home. Anyway, can I just say to make you feel better, I took Boa out? Booa is a, she's a real cafe hall, like she absolutely loves them. She is great. She's really good. She loves it. But I took her to a restaurant once. I took her to the fucking bluebird in Chelsea,

which is a fancy place. I don't know who I thought I was. I know, really fancy. I can't remember why. I went there for a reason. Had Bua. Got there. There's a load of tables outside.

Yeah. Got there. She just jumped on the fucking table. She's never done to anything like that before. I was just standing there. Tablecloth and everything. She just like jumped. I was like, oh, we left.

I couldn't stay. I was like, I have to go. I'm so sorry. Like, what the fuck was that? It just came out of nowhere. She just flew. And it was like winter, so like porporints, like muddy porprints on the table. I love that.

That is iconic. It was awful. It was so bad. Oh, man. Okay. Bad? Yeah, my own bad. I mean, like, I just, I'm fine.

Like, I'm totally fine. But I'm just finding everything an awful lot at the moment. Like, I'm very just, I'm just, I feel like, word of the month. I'm just very overwhelmed. Which is fine. It's just. it's not being a mom, I'm literally so, that's so great. I actually feel like we've got into a really good stride.

She's not sleeping great, but like that feels pretty good. Like that side of things is down but work. It's just like I'm coming to the like realization that I just can't do it all right now. Maybe I will be able to again. But right now I just can't do it all and something's got to give. And I'm just trying to work out what's got to give. However, my boundaries are so terrible. We've been talking about painting the downstairs leave for so long.

Always, it's been one of those things since we moved in. Oh, we'll do it one day, we'll do it one day, we'll do it one day. Sunday, we went for a walk in the morning. I cried the whole walk to Alex. I'm so overwhelmed. My to do-liss is so long. I went to France in August, like middle of August, and I haven't unpacked my suitcase because I haven't had the time out.

And every night I go to bed and I look at it, and I just shed a little tear. I'd shed more if I had the energy, but I don't. And I shed a little tear because it's like a visual reminder of how overwhelmed I am. Like, every day, I run my mom crying, like, literally being like, can you come and I'm on parking for me? me because I just can't. She said no. Well, no, she didn't say no. But then when she said yes, I was like, that's too much. I'll just do it myself. Anyway, but I've been very, like, stressed about it, just because I've just got so much to do and I'm so behind on everything.

And I'm just so aware that the brands that we work with and messages, everything is suffering because I just can't do it. And then we got back and Alex was like, shrippin, and I was like, sure. So I wasted my only fucking day when I could have got anything done starting something new. Obviously we only have time to do one coat. So now all the stuff that was in the bathroom loo is now in the kitchen. We've got it all with the fucking dust sheets and the masking tape. The paint's still out because I've only had time to do one coat. I should never have done it. But did you unpack your suitcase. No, Alex. Am I can't? What? What? I didn't unpack it. I didn't get all my work done. I didn't get through the emails. I didn't. We just were like, oh yeah, let's just do that. And then obviously I made it all Alex's fault. I was like, I cried to you all morning. about how stressed I am. Why did you suggest it? And then I'm like, no, I'm angry with myself. Why do I have no boundaries? So good at prioritising. I'm so upset with myself. And then I cried all the Sunday night that I'd wasted my day. I mean, has it brought you joy? It does look nice. Okay. But it's not finished. So no. So no. So no. It's brought me more stress because now

I've had to add paint second coat to my to-do list. Yeah. So you know what I'll be doing this Sunday? Posing the second bloody coat. Oh, so annoying. Yeah, that's probably a bad. Yeah, very bad. Very, very bad. Yeah, still haven't done my suitcase. It's really, honestly, upsets me so much when I look at it. Do you want help?

I'm good at unpacking. I need, like, full professional help at this point. Like, maybe, maybe fair, like, hypnotisation. So, like, I just, I just can't, I just don't have the time. And I can't leave all over on the bed now because she rolls off the bed. Yeah, on a realistic level, something's got to get. I'm working too much without full childcare. But it's just.

A lot. It's just a lot. Yeah. It's just a lot. So I shouldn't have painted the fucking bathroom. Put the paint brush down. It was a stupidest thing. I've ended up in my whole life.

Honestly, I literally, and I just cried. How long did it take? I'm fucking ages out. I'm just, I'm confused. But I'm not judging. You definitely are. I'm just. You went, oh, my God, M.

You can't prioritise it. That was judgment. I heard it. Can I deserve it? I think I'm, I'm intrigued. Yeah, I'm an idiot. I just, I mean, the thing is, it's just so many things I want to do.

It could have been very therapeutic. and it does look nice cathartic maybe it does look nice I might do it tonight okay yeah I think maybe it's got to get it done yeah Georgie offered to come over

she's been painting an awful lot recently oh she's good yeah she's a good painter bit of the busman's holiday for her coming over for dinner I'd be like you finished painting your house have you come paint mine anyway I'm fine

I think that's fair I'm just trying to be honest but then when I talk about on the internet people are like oh maybe you've got depression maybe you've got this and I'm like guys please don't say that because I'm just trying to share the honesty

and I find that really difficult like because I am fine it's just a lot it's just a lot and I am fine and also you're you're able to assess how you're feeling yourself

and I get the people trying to be kind yeah I completely but I just want to be able to share it to say if you're also feeling like this and I also don't because people keep messaging me

being like you're doing so much when you've got a kid and I can't and it's like I can't either and I just I really want to stress that yeah totally without be yeah I get that yeah I just want to say like

yeah I'm just yeah I'm trying to be honest because I don't want anyone to look at me and be like, oh, she's finding it really easy. Yeah. Because that would be a lie. That would be a lie. Happy, though. Happy? Happy.

Okay, that's good. I'm incredibly happy and just very overwhelmed. That's why I know it's not depression. Like, it's something. It's sure of shit something, but it's not depression because I feel very happy. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Like, I'm all right.

I'm just. Yeah, you see my guy. I'm fine. I'm just very overwhelmed. Yeah. There's just a lot to do. Well. Goods, goods, goods.

Oh. Oh. I didn't do my good. My good is that I successfully made a dinner that with enough left over for both of mine and Dave's lunch

for the next day. Proud of you. I've never been able to do because that means portioning, rationing, thinking especially because Dave's fussy about his food loser.

Absolute loser and did it. And I made him a little pat lunch in a Pyrex box. So proud of you. Made me a little pat lunch. Look at that, a good little, good little wife. Thank you. That's my good. Oh, God, I'm so proud of you.

Two good. Yours. One, went to Downing Street, climb the huge ground stairs. And the online safety bill is finally being passed. Yay. That's what we were talking about, the roundtable. So that was really cool. Really proud of myself. It was pretty epic.

Yep. You looked good as well. Like the outfit. Thank you very much. Oh my God. My bad, if I wasn't having a breakdown, my bad would have been the fact that I ordered a suit from Abercrombie and I, honestly. Oh my God.

I looked like an extra in the office. It was really bad. So I'm not keeping that. But no, my other good is our guest today. After a very long time and a lot of persuading. My mum's here. We've got my mum on the podcast. How cool.

But yeah, so my mum's here. And she came to talk to us specifically about her huge endeavours into exercise over the last 10 years. Yeah. We talk about all of it in the episode, but something I didn't do because we're not very good at being smushy with each other is say that my mom is literally my biggest. like I just think she's the most amazing woman I have ever known like honestly like I mean you're here in a second but and I feel like anyone who follows me on Instagram knows I'm like weirdly obsessed with my own mom I just think she's so amazing and it was so cool actually to take stock and like sit and listen to actually what she's done because I know I've seen it all over 10 years but then when you like actually listen to it it's so amazing I think for context I was aware when we were speaking we didn't mention that my mom was one of the founder patrons of Help for Heroes so she was very been involved with help for her as for a long time, which is the kickstarter for how she got into her exercise journey. But yeah, she's just unreal and I'm so proud of her and so excited that she came on and yeah, I hope you will love her as much as I do. So without further ado,

that's my mom. Hello. Hello. Hello. Special guest. Special guest. I'm going to introduce you because I want to. I think you know are a bit better than me, just a bit. I'd hope so. Highly requested guests today. We finally have my mum on the podcast. And we're going to talk, well, I mean, we could talk about anything, but I think the thing that most people really want to hear about it,

well, most people really want to ask you is if you're all right, because you do the weirdest stuff with your free time. You've done 10 Iron Man's to date. Thankfully, you've retired now. And if you tell me otherwise, you're out. I'm not hearing it. But you've done 10 Iron Man's, countless half, cycled across America, across Europe, a bunch of times.

You've got to Everest Base Camp, Snowden, anything else, probably? Well, strictly speaking, I've started 10 Iron Man's, but I only finished nine. I had a back problem, which meant I couldn't run. A bulging disc in her back. And she still did the swim and the cycle and just decided to sit the marathon out. Actually, the annoying thing is, by the time I'd finished the cycle, I was feeling so pumped that I couldn't believe I wasn't going to do the run. Unfortunately, I hadn't packed my trainers otherwise I'd have probably done it

just because the adrenaline gets to you a bit. Can you tell it, for anyone who doesn't know, can you tell us exactly what an iron man entails? Yeah, so an iron man is, it's basically a long distance triathlon. The distances are 2.4 mile swim, open water, so that will be in a lake or sea or reservoir or whatever. So 2.4-mile swim, a 112-mile cycle ride, and then you run the marathon at the end. Which is 26.2 miles. It is 26.2 miles, yeah.

Bloody hell. I know. I just couldn't. Well, it's weird, actually. It's one of those things that you, if I said to you, I've done a half-iron man, and I give you half of those statistics, people go, oh, God, I couldn't do that. So there's at some point where somebody might think, oh, I could do that. But Iron Man is so extreme that, yeah, very few people go, oh, yeah, I'll give that a go. You can't just give it a go. It's one of those things you do have to train for a bit. And you gave it a go for the first time. I think this is what makes, because Iron Man is really impressive.

And Alex, my husband, does Iron Man, not to be confused with my co-host, I do not do I am men. I am men. I am men. Anyway, Boy Al does them. And it's impressive when he does them as a 30-year-old man. But it's like next level crazy, impressive, that you did your first one at age 50.

And you did one a year, basically, for the next 10 years. Yeah. Which is bonkers. Most people don't start it in their 50s. And whenever I put anything about any of your mad endeavours on my Instagram, the question that I always get is from women maybe a little bit older than are being advertised these events saying about how? Like what made you, what possessed you aged 49 to be like?

Well, if I can just answer that, I didn't know what it was when I said yes. Okay. So I'd been fundraising for the charity Help for Heroes by doing a cycle event. And after having got fit to cycle, I thought, well, maybe I could do the London Marathon. You know, anything's possible. so I started trying to train a bit for a marathon and had all sorts of problems with my ankles went to see a doctor who said really you've got this odd condition I can't remember what he said but he said you know we could try surgery but usually it occurs in people who

were older and overweight so I usually suggest they don't do anything but really running is the worst thing you can do. He said, physio, and stick to the bike, but no, running. So I had to say to the charity, really sorry, I won't be running the London Marathon for you. And they completely understood. But then I had a contact from somebody else at the charity who maybe didn't understand what I'd just said, who said, how about doing an Ironman for us or with us? And I was out in a dog walk at the time and I thought, oh yeah, that's a good idea. I'll do that. It was only when I got home, I googled that the end part of the Iron Man is actually running a marathon. But then the guy who was coordinating the team rang me up and said, hey, I hear you're going to come and do an Iron Man

with us. And I said, oh, there's been a bit of a miscommunication and I'm afraid I can't. And he said, why not? And I said, well, I got this problem with my ankles. And he said, ankles? You've got ankles? What are you worried about? Turns out two of the team didn't even have legs. You know, They were wheelchair. They'd both lost legs in Afghanistan. So really, it didn't, you know, I had nothing to complain about. As you said, I've got ankles. What am I worried about? So with that can-do attitude, that's how I started it. Stupidity, firstly, by not checking. And then just shamed into it. Well, it was helpful heroes that got you, because it was helpful heroes, it was the same for me in that. And I do think, it gives you an amazing, like you say, launching pad, because I remember you saying this to me once and the first bike ride I ever did was obviously because you'd bullied me into it, which is all my friends say, don't get drunk around France because you'll end up signed up to some sort

of triathlon or something. So I was on one of these bike rides and it was the first time I'd done any sort of exercise ever in 2013. So it must have been your third bike ride maybe. And it's so Help for Heroes, fourth. Yeah. Help for Heroes do these bike rides like across Europe every year, like, and they do, they call the battlefield bike ride and you'd basically go with a group of wounded service men and women and you as the fundraisers and you basically cycle together through the battlefields and you stop at various places along the way and you lay wreaths and you learn about the battles and it's amazing. Like it was just, and in it's, like, we had some of the best memories ever doing those rides and it's my first one and I was

so unfit and I was struggling so much. And I remember cycling along with you and this guy, Ben, who's amazing, Ben Zeissman, and he was paralyzed from the waist down. And I was cycling along with both of you, and you were telling us off because we were going too slowly and jabbering at the back. And I said to him, I can't feel my legs. And he said, I can't feel my legs. And he said, I can't feel my legs. And he went, oh, shit, me neither.

We've got to get a move on. And it's kind of that that makes you realize that you can't really, you know, but you can complain. You sound like a bit of a knob if you do. Yeah, well, the the best thing was, because you'd been winging at me all day. And I kept saying to you, look, you're very lucky. You've got all your

working limbs and stuff. There are boys here who, they were just boys, I think, on that one. But there were guys on the thing with legs that don't work or paralyzed or whatever. And it wasn't really till you got chatting to Ben. But then the two of you were chatting so much. I thought, oh my God, we're never going to get into the hotel tonight.

You know, it's just, yeah, I mean, Jabby-Yabba, the two of you. Classic. But it is like, so your first bike ride with them was 2010. Yeah. What was that? Like, because I don't, I don't remember you do it because I just, my memories of you as a child were. No, I was, I never did anything.

I literally, I hadn't ridden a bicycle since I was a child. And then I don't think I'd really ridden a bicycle. I'd never run. I was very good at sitting on the sofa and smoking. That was what I did for, and drinking, very well. See, in my head, you'd always been really active. Maybe not Iron Man active. No, no, no. Never, never, never.

Oh my God, this makes even more like crazy. Never done anything. I was the most idle slob you could possibly imagine. And having started the charity with a guy called Bryn Parry, Bryn decided to raise money for the charity by doing this bike ride across France. Now, I was getting involved in the charity in another way. I was getting stuff for the wounded guys in the hospital, but also starting to get the media and the press behind it.

So Bryn said to me, come on, we're going on this bike ride. And I said, no, Bryn, you do the bike ride and I'll do the media and what have you? So every year he'd come at me for it. Anyway, 2010, which was, I think, the probably third or fourth year of doing it, he said to me, now you're going to do the bike ride this year. And I said, now, I'm not. I'm still, you know, still haven't grown any lunacy about me. And he said, but you are because we're going to Arnhem, which is where my father had fought and won the Victoria Cross. So I said, well, I'd be very interested to come to Arnham with you, but I know there are trains and planes and what have you that I could take.

Anyway, I don't know how he managed it, but he absolutely had me. And, yeah, the next thing I know, I was buying a bicycle and getting fit. But so I had done nothing until 2010. So, yeah, I was, what, 49? Yeah. Anyway, so that's how it all started. But then, as I say, I didn't want to lose the fitness having, because it takes a bit to, you know, we're cycling sort of 75, 80 miles a day.

And it takes a bit to get that fit. So I didn't want to lose it, which was when I thought I'd start running. Was it hard at first? I mean, going from absolutely not. Very hard it is. Yeah. It absolutely is. which is why every time I do a bike ride with, you know, new people,

try and spend time with them chatting and taking their mind off it because it's very, yeah, it's very hard work if you're not used to it. And you do become used to it, which is why I was saying to Emily about, you know, running a half marathon or what have you. She thinks, oh gosh, I'm not fit because I've just had a baby. But actually your body remembers it does. and it's not so hard to get going against once you've done it once or twice or in my twice 15 times.

Your mental strength is like your physical strength is obviously very impressive but your physicality takes its toll like doing Ironman's and stuff all the time like your back's bad, you've had a sore knee, how many times have you had whatever's done to your shoulder? Yeah, both shoulders, both knees, three bulging disc. in my spine, a hip issue, and obviously the first thing was the ankle issue. Yeah. I was going to say, did the running exacerbate the ankles? It's the least of my worries now, quite frankly.

Everything's falling apart, which is why actually I did say I'd stop at 10, but I'm passing the mantletal. Don't you butt me? Because it's like, and I don't want to make it all about me, but it's watching someone do an Iron Man is brutal. Like, you worry so much. I was an iron orphan and now I'm an iron widow. Like, but you, I mean, get me a tiny violin

because you do have to get up at 4 in the morning. I know, I'm getting the water. Do you know what? The worst iron mine I've ever done was the one I supported when my friend Alex Wong did Iron Man Wales. And watching him do it was way worse than taking part. I'd rather run a marathon than watch one. A hundred percent.

Yeah, I mean, you know, I was a... Alex is really relating to that. Yeah, it is, it is hard to watch you do it, though, in that, like, I know things hurt. And it isn't worry, what if you fall off your bike? What if you drown? I know you always say, when I'm off the bike, then you can relax. Because, I mean, two guys drowned in the Irish Half Iron Man a couple of weeks ago. Did they?

Yeah, and they fall off bikes. Yeah. You can often see, like, coming in when you're watching it, but if people are bloodied, like, Because, you know, they're a special breed design man. They're not going to stop for like a smashed up face. So they're coming in, it's like covered in blood. And it's like, oh, my God, my God. Because the underwater, sorry, not the open water swimming.

Yeah, it's not underwater. She's a moment. That would be a very extreme iron man, isn't it? I have to hold your breath for a long time, too. Two hours and 20 minutes. The open water swimming. Isn't that quite dangerous? Because there's so many of you just thrashing around all in one place.

Yeah, I have to say, I've. I've never gone for a time, so it suits me very well to hang back, which I do. But I've been in a few conditions. One was Lake Zurich when there was an electrical storm. And the waves were really quite choppy. And we had, well, actually the guy I was doing it with Threw Up. He got seasick swimming in a lake. And another one was pulled up.

Basically, 25% of the field did not get beyond the swim. Wow. That was Barcelona, right? No, that was in Zurich. Barcelona was, I mean, the waves, it was really, we look like David Attenborough's penguins, you know, going in and then just being pulled along by the current. And it was, it was terrifying. And actually what really put me off that one was, I was standing in the queue, you desperately try and go to the loo before you go because you don't want to, yeah. Shitting your wetsuit.

You really sound shitting a lot. P is fine. but everything else. You'll try and do that before you. And, of course, you'd get stage fright. You can't do it. Anyway, that's a whole other issue. But anyway, two women in front of me, both Americans,

they'd trained all year or for at least a year. This was their big event. They'd flown over from the States. And one of them went and looked at the sea, and she came back and she said, I can't do it. And they'd both decided they couldn't do it because it was too rough. And you think, you've trained for so long.

And it's expensive. I mean, you're really committing. Not the necessarily signing up, but the bikes and the kit and the... Well, and the sign up is sort of 400 quid. Oh, wow, okay. And then they'd flown over from America and then looked at the sea and said no. So, of course, I'm then thinking, oh, holy crap, what am I doing? Ironically, it was the best swim I ever did, time-wise, yeah.

I think because I concentrated more. I went to a wedding the week after, and there was a guy with a sling on. And I was like, oh, what did you do to your arm? And he was like, oh, I was at Iron Man, Barcelona. I did my first front crawl and the wave got him and dislocated his shoulder. It was brutal.

It was brutal. Ouch. And I'm just got to watch my like the little love of my life just waddling into the sea and I'm like, well see ya. All right, can we take this penguin thing or whatever, the little love

woodling it? Oh, I would lose my mind. The willowy athlete galloping into the waves. That's what I like to think of. Sorry, yeah. Diving in, majestic, a little front flip. I would lose my mind.

my mind to watch what it just wouldn't happen with my mum like it definitely wouldn't wouldn't happen but I would lose my mind having to watch with worry yeah yeah yeah I can't I mean I've told this story in the podcast before but we we there was a mountain near us when we were growing up and my dad was like one day we're going to take we're going to go on the we're going to go to the mountain so my mum put on little loafers Prada loophers in it was in north wales I don't I can't remember what it's called, though. So, you know, we're not dressed any better, really, but she was in her prada loafers,

and it was snowy and icy, and she just got stuck on the mountain, completely stuck on the mountain. Couldn't move. My dad was furious and embarrassed. Like, why would you put on your pradovers to come onto a mountain? So that's the extent of my mum's athletic prowess

and also adventure. Horses for courses, though. Horses for courses. Well, I think that would have been me, I've got a very old friend of mine who jokes about we used to go and stay with her in Sedba in, is that Cumbria? Yeah. And they had a hill behind their house and the family would just sort of routinely stomp up the hill. And I would just always claim I couldn't.

You know, I'd got high-heeled shoes and painted toenails. She was thought I was just the most bizarre creature to ever come up and stay that I'd arrive in heels and painted toenails when they'd, just got hiking boots and that's what they'd do all day. It just definitely, definitely wasn't for me. I'd have been your mum in the Prada Lowe's. That's so interesting. I don't know what changed, but yeah. Well, you do, I mean, I remember as well, because, like,

you'd go to a sporter sometimes after dropping us off at school. Does the sporter still go? But, like, the gym. But exercise wasn't, it's so weird looking at our lives now from what we were as kids. Like, we watch TV a lot. We didn't go, we walk the dogs, but like, not far. Oh, reluctantly. Very reluctantly.

And I'd say, we're going to walk the dogs. Oh, I've got to go. I know. But it's like, it's really weird that you, well, not really weird, but like, it's, it is where people don't believe me if I say that you didn't, that you weren't. It wasn't your, it wasn't your, yeah, you weren't, yeah. But aside from wanting to then keep up the fitness after having, you know, gained a bit of fitness with the cycling, there must have been something that you enjoyed mentally. about it.

Yeah. You see, this is a bizarre thing because I really don't know what I get out of it. I get a lot of dread and fear leading up to it. You know, I haven't done enough.

I catastrophes about what can go wrong. I have all of those fears and misgivings and then sick on the morning. Oh, my God, you feel just terrible, terrible. Honestly, I feel like

I'm literally walking into the gallows. Yeah, no, I feel like I'm going to the gallows. She just walks like. sad. And then the moment you get in the water, you're doing it. And then all your head starts to settle and you go, yeah, I can do this. I can do this. And as soon as I start doing it. And then towards the end of the run, when you can kind of see the finish line coming up, you, yeah, you can then start to celebrate and get euphoric. And you do. There's a great sense of satisfaction um and actually what i'm probably underplaying is in the preparation to it

the getting fit in itself is a is a reward you know every you've just done a nine-mile run now it might have hurt but you come back going you know i have got it in me it's it's a buzz you you'll you feel it you absolutely do i don't know i was trying to work this out if it was if it's nature or nurture with the I'm going to say massacism but then you touched on it before

and obviously I know this story but your dad won a Victoria Cross in World War II which is the highest award you can win for Valour like he's an amazing he was an amazing man and like just the mental strength

that he showed to do what he did to fight how he fought and to win what he did. Like, I'm not saying your Iron Man's your Victoria Cross. Like it's an odd comparison, but you, it feels like mentally you've got

the grit, the strength that he had and you just, and this is where, because I don't think, I don't think it's normal. I don't think normal people can do what you do. I don't think normal people go like you go. Plenty of people do Iron Man. Yeah, and I think they're all extraordinary.

Well, maybe. Yeah. I think so. I don't think, like, people with, I don't know, people who aren't epic. You have to tap in. Like, you dedicate so much. You have to work so hard. You put your body through so much.

The fortunate thing for me in doing it in later life is I had more time to train. You know, when I see your owl having to get his training in, you know, around work hours. And, you know, there's that silly little cartoon. Do you remember that, yeah. So it's all about, you know, two people in the office having a conversation and the woman's trying to understand, you know, what's going on with this man, why he just has to get up at 5 o'clock every morning and everything. His answer is, I'm training for an iron man. Basically, I've got to go to bed at 7 o'clock in the evening because I've got to get up, you know, and train for an iron man. And it is.

It's very consuming. So if you've got more time on your hands as I had, it's easier. So respect to those people who managed to do a proper full-time day job and a family life and and. Yeah. It is a special breed, though. Honestly, I'd actually really recommend it to anybody who just wants to like, because you get such a buzz watching it, like just watching people across the finish line.

And it's like, I cry for people that I don't know. And I could honestly cry picturing them because it's like when you watch someone come onto the red carpet and they get there and it's like, you know, you haven't just shown up. You've put fucking everything into this and then you get there and they're coming down the thing and their legs aren't working and they're bleeding and they're just physically done and they're just so happy. It's amazing. Watching people finish. There is footage I saw the other day on Instagram of a guy of 85 finishing an Ironman and I just think oh yeah respect and then I'm thinking shit perhaps I still have to do some more.

I haven't got to 85 yet. You don't. No, I know, I don't. I know I don't. But the terrible irony, actually, fortunately, fortunately, things worked the way they did. But the last one I did, which was the 10th one I started, obviously only the 9th one I finished. She's really hung up about that. I know, I think it's not saying that.

I mean, the 10th one that you did. So we were in, bless her, Emily came along to watch. Well, Alex was doing it as well. We were in Estonia. And so we completed the Iron Man on the night. Well, for me it was the night. Alex finished his in the afternoon. Did all our celebrations, went back to the hotel.

I seemed to remember a couple of pints of beer and a pizza went down. Anyway, it was a lovely evening. And the next morning, sitting in the hotel, just sort of quietly drinking a cup of coffee. And my phone rang. And it was the organiser. And she said, are you still in Estonia? And I said, yeah.

She said, why aren't you at the awards ceremony? And I said, well, why would I be? And she said, because you came third in your age category. You qualified for Kona, which is the World Championship. But what they do is they offer the place. So they say, you know, to the first, maybe they'll give entry to the World Championship to the first, second and third of every age category. But if you don't want to take up your place, it's offered to the next person down,

so the fourth person or the fifth person. So they'd already given away my place But I did get down in time to pick up my award But I thought how fortunate If I'd been at the award ceremony And I'd been offered a place at the World Championship I'd have probably had to Because that's in Hawaii and Hawaii

Yeah I wouldn't have minded it Of all the places she's dragged me to watch her do an Iron Man It's like a little bit better than Bolton Which is that said The World Championship is in October And I'm wondering what they'll do this year With a terrible

Fires and stuff they've had there Anyway, but that was last year So it wouldn't have been a problem last year Anyway, I didn't go I've got the I've got the The award Yeah, third place That's amazing, that's so, so cool

Well I think there's probably three people In my age category No one needs to do that And you are officially done now Yeah, yeah I've just agreed to do a half next year Half Iron Man Half Iron Man

Yeah Which in love itself is still as I say, if we hadn't talked about the first set of statistics and I'd said to you, you know, just over a mile swim and 56 miles on a bike and a half marathon at the end, you'd still go, whoa, that sounds like a lot. Yeah, exactly so. Yeah, so I'll do one of those next year.

I'm going to also walk the coastal path of the Isle of Man, which is going to be a nice little challenge. That's really fast, like 100 miles. Yeah, it's 100 miles, but none of them are flat. No. We did a few of them this year. In a week. Five days, six days a week, however long it takes, I guess.

Yeah, exactly how long it takes. So, yes, I've got a few things lined up, but not necessarily another Iron Man. That's a lovely thing. You've been a really big part of the Havagos, the Hags. And actually, it was you that came up with the name. Because if you ever need a brand naming. Honestly, it's such a good name. It's such a good name.

It's my hours spent on a buy-a-go. on my own out in the middle of nowhere with all sorts of stuff sorting through my head. So yeah, send me off with a task and I'll come back with something. I generally do if I need something like figured out. I'm like, hmm, I'll tie it up when you've got a bike ride. So you've been instrumental in setting up the hag. I mean, the hags, everyone calls your mum a hag because that's what you are. But I think people sometimes project a lot of their own.

feelings of inferiority when it comes to exercise because they think oh you're you're so amazing you can't possibly know what it's like to struggle running a 5k or whatever but something that you've maintained throughout it and you touched on earlier is this like it doesn't matter how far you're going it doesn't matter how fast you do it it is about having a go and it kind of feels like that even when you're doing the most extreme and extraordinary things your attitude with it is very patient with yourself and with others and very just like not laissez-faire because you've got that grit inside you, but it's not a competitive thing. No, not at all. I still, every time I turn up to an event and it could be an Ironman or even just a sprint triathlon, I arrive with

imposter syndrome. I think, what am I doing here? You know, what right have I got to do this? You know, I'm pushing my bike along and thinking people are going to look at me and think, what, she's going to take part, that one, you know. So I still don't feel like I have a ride. or belong and that's that's from years and years of going into a gym and thinking people are going to look at me and think what's she doing here and she's not doing that right and you know she doesn't look like she ought to and I think so many people feel that and you know it quite amuses me the reverse of imposter syndrome which is the you know the billy big bollocks who rock up with their four, yeah, and then they're absolutely hopeless, which I kind of wish I had a bit more

of their attitude, but I don't. I always arrive thinking people are going to be looking at me and thinking, what's she doing here? And I, 10 Iron Man's, nine, and I still haven't got over that. Ten Iron Man starts, yeah, but I still haven't got over that feeling. As I say, you know, even going to short events or, you know, short events. God, I would not have imposter syndrome if I was you. Oh, it's weird. I would show up my award. I know it pinned.

Toothed. Yeah. They do get the tattoo, a lot of the Iron Man. Do they? Probably for that reason. But you see, no, I'd feel embarrassed to have that as well. I'd have people look at me going, what? She's done an Iron Man, you know.

Yeah, it's weird. I hate that you feel like that. But I get it because it's not, it's a bit. massive part of the ethos of the hags because it's not yeah it's like we don't have a view of we don't we don't actually have the representation a lot of women in sport but certainly not older women in sport you know you imagine i i feel it when i'm i mean i was literally i stopped counting at 30 but i was overtaken by so many people on my run yesterday i was like oh fuck it but you don't we don't really have the celebration of the slower people doing it of older people of anything that isn't like

beefcake, we're a waving man. Which is annoying. Yeah, and I just don't have that competitive element. I'll be out with my trainer, Cal. And he's like, you know, say, we're on bicycles. You say, okay, we're coming up on one there. You can overtake that. And I don't care about overtaking Cal.

But of course, that's his thing is you've got to be better. You've got to push harder all the time. And I just think, no, just have a nice time, really. Just get out, enjoy it. Enjoy the other people. I mean, there's nothing better than, you know, if you sort of fall into stride, you're not allowed to on a bicycle because it's, there's a thing called drafting where you can benefit from sitting behind the person in front of you. Again, that's an extreme. So, well, if you, well, if you watch the peloton on a push bike races, you know, people are taken along by the group.

But anyway, so you're not allowed to do that in Iron Man. But there was a half Iron Man I did a few years ago. And I remember coming across this girl on the run and she was, she'd sort of stopped and she'd had enough. And I was feeling like I'd quite had enough but I still had another six miles or so to go. And so I got chatting to her and said, come along with me, I'm not going very fast

and, you know, she needed to stop a bit. But she didn't stop completely. And she had another lap to do. So when I finished, I waited for her. her and saw her I wasn't going to run another lap I didn't have that in me but you know I think she would have given up because she was on her own and was feeling very bleak about it and when I said to look I'm really struggling too let's struggle together for a while um so it's well it's nice to yes it's yeah I couldn't have given a damn about my time yeah um but I just wanted to help her get through

so and in a very selfish way I how you know somebody else's problems takes your mind off your own So a bit like Em was saying about talking to the guy Ben when she was doing her first bike ride Share your problems with people and they do get halved It puts a lot into perspective as well isn't it Yeah and I bet that The non-competitive edge Just wanting to like

Just wanting to do it for the fun of it and to enjoy it That's probably much more big beneficial to you than someone who's doing it to be the best and overtake and be number one and just try and I don't know if that's necessarily very good mentally I don't know whom I actually don't have to it might it might work for them and there are people who have to be like that yeah yeah he wants to be the best of the best yeah but the the first few ironman competitions I competed in competed you see I don't even feel like I competed but I took part as part of the team is called Team True Spirit

and we were a group of they were all military I've got no military background aside from my dad's war history some of them were wounded some of them worked in support and the purpose was as a team to get everybody round it wasn't for anybody to go for individual glory

and to me that felt much more of an important thing and it was only really after a couple of those that I realised that, you know, the rest of the people around us were going for important times and, you know, beating records. And I'm like, oh, God, no, we're just getting around. And having a lot, well, a bit of a laugh and a lot of a panic. I remember one of your laughs was with this lovely guy called Sai Harmer, who's missing both of his legs.

And he, I think it's one of the half-iron mans that you did. And he was coming out the water, and we were watching everyone coming out of the water. And the guy was going, and they're really helpful, like, officials. And they go, when you're coming out of a triathlon, they go, find your legs. like get your legs ready because your legs have gone pretty quiet for the swim you're just using upper body really

so it's getting your legs otherwise when you try and stand up your legs go a bit wobbly anyway he was being helpful he wasn't being whatever he was just saying like find your legs find your legs like we're here whatever and he was going find your legs and sigh was going shit I've lost them

in this guy's face he was like oh my gosh well he was kind of helpfully pulling us all out of the water and he pulled sigh up and there were no legs so good But that's such a lovely part of, and I guess it's that I've always cited Help for Heroes as being selfishly, a really, an instrumental and brilliant part of getting my head right with exercise. Because I think if I'd have gone into it, if my introduction hadn't been the bike ride, I think I'd have gone into it, focused on myself, thinking about myself, how I was being perceived, how, what everybody thought of me, how quick I was. but like you say, when you're doing it with a team of,

particularly like the wounded guys as they were, and then there were more women as well over time. When you're doing it with a group like that, you're in perspective and you're much more, it's just much more fun. It's like you're not, I don't know, I think exercise, again, when we think about triathom, think about long distance,

think about marathons, you don't think of it as being camaraderie. You think about it as quite an individualistic thing. You don't do, you've always, this is your superpower as well. got an empty house but you've also never got an empty like empty event like if you're going to do something you're going to drag everyone else with you well I have to say it's as you talk about that I think being a part of a team which is where the hags is so good um our cycle race across

America we did as an eight woman team um so you are all contributing to the team effort and I think when I've done a couple of walks with the hags actually three now and taking a group of, in fact, they were all girls, I think, on the ones that we've done. But, you know, who some of them don't think, maybe don't think they can do it and everybody believing and helping each other out, you get everybody through. And it's so much more satisfying than stalking off and walking your walk. You know, if you're doing it with a group of people and all of you helping each other to get through, yeah, that's the point really, isn't it?

I mean, yeah, the race across America, we hadn't even talked about that. You were the first female wounded team? Yeah, certainly the first, though, again, here's my imposter syndrome, because I'm not even wounded. Well, apart from just generally being a bit decrepit, but yes, it was a mix of civilian and military, and some were wounded, injured and sick. And I didn't really come under any of those categories. but yeah we had the girl I shared the van with the girl called Neris and she's paralysed from the chest down she had a motorcycle accident she was in the

military and I mean talk about nerves of steel that girl could get on her hand bike and like 50 miles an hour down a hill without even thinking about it I mean terrifying you wouldn't do that on your car 55 no no chance but yes a very very inspirational lot of women Yeah, she is. She's amazing. But again, that's, you know, it's the team spirit that does it, that gets you through, definitely. You're epic. Just honestly. You're, I mean, I just can't really relate.

So we can't tempt you. I don't think so. I don't think so. Give it time. I am one of these people, though, that I probably would start it and get obsessed for a short while. Yeah. Maybe not that long, but I think. Yeah, well, Dave used to do triathons, never an Iron Man. I think Dave would have told us if he'd have done an Iron Man.

Yeah. I think he'd be really proud of himself if he'd done an Iron Man. I think he's triathlons. And he loved them and it's a real shame. Well, they're all triathlons. I've got some spaces to Blenning next year. You can come and do Blenning. Yeah?

He'd love that. Oh, text him after this. He would love that. Mama love that. Daisy, do you want to come? Fuck yeah. You want to do it? Yay!

Oh, my God, great. See, it's infectious. Yeah, it is infectious. Come on, Al. Well, we'll be there to support the hags. The haggies are doing it. Come and do it with the hags. What month?

It's in June. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe. You might be a bit soon. Might be a bit soon. Maybe they do it the year after. I'll come to support though. You might be a bit busy, but yeah, we'll have to do it on the Saturday because I'm doing a half-hour man on the Sunday.

What would you say to anybody? And actually, just, well, we don't, we don't know, it would be weird for me to be this randomly nice to you in our normal life. but you've been the biggest inspiration to me with all the exercise I'd ever done because I wouldn't, well, I wouldn't have done it if I hadn't had you, but I definitely wouldn't have enjoyed it. I think I'd have stayed in a very toxic, I'm doing this to be thin, state

rather than doing it just because I can or because it's awesome or whatever. And like, yeah, you've been, you've been, I mean, I feel really bad, I'm mean, when we cycle together and I take it all out on you and I make it all your fault. And if anything hurts, I'm horrible to her. I hate you. You've done this. Why are we doing it? It's just stupid. Go away. Don't look at me. Don't cycle near me. I'm so bad. Sounds really fair, rational. It isn't. But you are just, and I'm so lucky to have you as my inspiration, because I just, you're my absolute hero. I just think you're amazing. But I know that you are for a lot of other people as well. So what would you say to anyone if they're listening that just thinks they can't do it? What would you say to them? well things like there's no such word as can't and what have you those there's a really really silly things to to say and different people are motivated differently and by different things but i would say you know if you can find a group of people um to support you in it in in the way of vags and you don't physically need to have somebody with you but um so it's quite a good online community to support um

that, you know, start small, start in your comfort zone. Don't be as stupid as I am and sign up to something before you've read, you know, read what it is. But, yeah, the more you do, the easier it gets. And, you know, a little bit like you'll run the other day, you know, you push it a little bit further each time and it gets a little bit easier each time. So, you know, don't be daunted by the end, you know, start. with putting one foot in front of the other and it is always every turn of the bicycle

or every stretch of the arm over your head you're getting one stroke, one cycle, one step closer to the end take it bit by bit rather than you know worrying about the whole I think that would be my thing the other thing is is that I know you were talking about calories and food and what have you is exercise is the one thing that's helped me to completely de-complicate my relationship with food because I'd worry about calories all the time.

And I remember the first time I did when I was training to do the first bike ride and I did a 50-mile ride and I remember thinking, oh my God. I mean, I couldn't have even peddled to the end of the road a few months before. And I remember looking at my watch and it said I'd burnt, I don't know how many calories. I remember thinking, God, I can have, I could eat anything I want. And then I thought, but actually, what I really want is, you know, and what I chose to eat were some Manx Kippers and some whole meal toast when I got back. But if you listened to your body, which when you do push it exercise-wise,

the chances are it's not screaming for a donut. It's shouting a little bit like during pregnancy. your body tells you much more clearly what you need. And so exercise did that for me. So the sort of double effect of the food thing as well as the actual physical fitness. I do feel like it's very positive. I feel like our relationship as a household in recent years

is very positive because it's so, it does feel more intuitive. I don't know, it's so much more intuitive. It just feels, you know, like with the running and with the, you need to fuel your body rather than... Yeah. Yeah. Not starving it. No, yeah, because you have to have a big...

That's much more our conversations now. It's like if we've got a lot to do in the morning, it's like, well, we need to have a big dinner because we've got a lot to do tomorrow. And it's a much nicer and healthier... Yeah. Yeah, I really like that. Definitely. Definitely, I'd say it's made food issues.

I mean, not that I had food issues, but as Emily will know, and probably a really unhealthy mother I was, that she probably grew up with me constantly going on a diet. We all did. That's what you all had. We all did. Yeah.

You were advertised like the Atkins and the cabbage soup and God knows what else. What even, I mean, you'll know, there was thousands. D diets don't tend to work, but eating what you need, which when you're exercising, you do need maybe carbs the night before. And you maybe even need a little bit of. sugar on the way to keep things going but um oh the gels oh horrible things i made a mistake once i remember taking your gel normally you have the gel sachets and you just have the one and it's like it's like it's like a red bull or probably even more than that it's like a super caffeine sugar thing and i remember

taking and you had these like little sweets oh yeah there's jelly things yeah and i didn't know i just thought they were a nice little sweets and i went on a bike ride on my own and i must have had about eight Were you flying, literally? And I caught back. I was like, oh my God, my hands. But honestly, people laugh when they talk about, because nutrition is so much a part of all of this thing. And literally, I have peanut, peanut M&Ms. So you've got your protein and your whatever, sort of flapjacks. And then for the run, I always take a cheese sandwich.

A cheap cheese sandwich at that. Chewish cheese sandwich. She just gets a petrol station and gets a cheap cheese sandwich. Well, if I'm doing it internationally, I was going to like W.H. Smith, because they're the most processed possible. Okay. Because you don't want anything too hard to digest. So really cheap white bread and cheap cheese. Yeah.

Perfect. Absolutely perfect. People laugh at me, but I swear to God. It works. When we're on the run, and I'm starting off on the run, clutching my sandwich, people are going by and going, oh, my God, that's such a good shout. And I think, yeah, well, I've done this a few times. You're in Haddington with your marmalade sandwich in your house. Yeah, but the last thing you want is anything more sweet.

and that's it so you have to listen to what you're you know you're craving and it would be the savour it would be the carb it's really interesting that exercise is decomplicated you said yeah totally totally yeah it's mad how ingrain this stuff is in us though isn't it like i went i've got a peloton that i haven't used in a really really long time especially like in the first trimester there was absolutely no chance half of the second trimester no chance either but I've been getting back on it now and doing like 20 minutes at time. Oh, wow. But like very slow compared to what I used to be doing.

But I feel doesn't matter. But I felt really, you know, the other day I felt really proud of myself for finishing this 20 minute class. And then it came up with how many calories I'd burned and where I came on the leaderboard. And I suddenly, and I, you know, it's a very low amount of calories compared to what you were burn if I was doing like a normal class. And then I feel, I feel that.

And I'm like, oh. Oh, you shouldn't. I know, I know. And I'm like, God, I, you know, I don't use a peloton, but can you turn that facility off? You can definitely turn off the lead of all thing. Yeah, but you can turn off the calories. You can turn it off, so it's not showing you constantly how many you're burning.

But at the end, it comes up with your, you know, your results. Well, you've just got to ignore that. I think, actually, the exercise and pregnancy are the two things that have really made me listen to my body. And I can recall going to the butchers. pregnant probably with them and just looking at raw liver and thinking oh i could i could just lean over right now and eat that that was probably my body saying i'm missing some iron or something yeah but um i think during pregnancy your body does tell you an awful lot more about how it's doing so you don't need some silly readout on a peloton i know i know and i got over and you're not trying

to burn calories you're you're making a baby you know right i just want to move yeah yeah yeah Keep moving. Keep moving. Keep healthy. It's like even now breastfeeding, you still need the calories because you've got to... I know. That's the thing. It's automatic.

It's not rational and like thought through. Like it's not my intellectual brain. It's like an instant just from so much conditioning of being like, oh my God, that's all I burned. Oh, then it wasn't a good workout. It's funny, isn't it? It's so funny. Now, I mean, it's not all about calorie burning. And definitely, as you say, not overstressing your heart, but keeping...

keeping it a little bit raised for a period of time. It's just keeping you ticking over fit. You know, you can't be expected to be, you know, keeping up with any previous whatever. And wouldn't worry about it. Absolutely wouldn't worry about it. But also you could just be like her and just when you're 49, just be like.

Yeah. Put an on man out of the life. Maybe I will. One thing I wanted to pick up on what you said as well, and I asked you the question about what you'd say to people who want to give it a go. and I think that what you touched on about feeling like you shouldn't be in the gym or like you don't look like you should be in the gym but you're not going to do it right and I think that's a huge barrier you'll know that's a huge barrier to stopping like women

primarily from actually doing exercise and I think even just you expressing that and people expressing that will help so many people realize that it's not just it's not just them You know, it's not just a me thing that I feel out of place in a gym. It's just a normal thing. And if you were to get through it, to get past it. Yeah, you see, the fact that I still feel it means I don't really have a solution to it. But I think that's okay. But I think it is very normal to feel it.

I think that's what I would say is it's really quite normal. And, you know, you were saying people are overtaking you on the run. You don't know that they haven't just done, they're just doing half a mile and they're sprinting it. I had an example of going when I was doing some when I was training for race across America which is totally different cycling to doing an Ironman because you were going out for

15 minute bursts and going fast and then you'd be taken back in the van and you wouldn't go out again for another hour or so and then you'd go and do another so I was going around the house near our house as a four mile loop and so I was doing little sprints and I was getting up on the pedals and whatever

and a bloke cycle passed me when I was up on my pedals and said, oh, it's much more effective if you sit down in your seat to cycle and he'd gone and I just thought, you don't know what I'm doing, I'm training, I'm training. And as Emily pointed out, when I got him absolutely spitting tax about this arrogant asshole who'd told me how to ride a bicycle, Em said, he wouldn't have said that to a bloke, would he? No way! No way, would one man tell another man that he'd be better off if he weren't standing up in the pedals. And I just thought, oh my God.

And that's why we feel like we feel because people like him are telling us how to do things. So, you know, as I say, I wanted to, afterwards, of course, I thought of all the things I should have said, which is, oi, stop right now, I'm going to tell you what I'm doing here. But yeah, you just, you don't know what anybody's race is, whether it's a race. You know, you could have been half a mile into a run.

You could have been 45 miles. into a run. They don't know. Yeah. But I also thought to myself as I was doing it, I was like, I thought, because you do that thing where you just think, I want to explain to the next person that overtakes me that I've just had a baby and I'm running nine miles and it's really hot and I was up like three times in the night. But then I'm just like, but I don't need, I don't need to do that. And one of the, this, one of the best things that ever happened to me was when I was first started running and this woman and she was like a gazelle and she like swish ponytail past me and I was like lumbering along with you.

years ago and I never forget her and she ran in front of me and I was just and I looked to her and I was like there's my hopes and dreams and they've gone like that's all I want to be and I'm not her and then I got to the end of the bridge that she'd overtaken me and she was like wheezing at the bottom and just walking for a bit and I was like oh my god she struggles like she's me and then yeah since then I just think it's you just don't know you don't know anything about anybody and you just we project our own inferiority onto people all the time for like no reason. But then again, it's hard for women. It's really, it's not, and it's not a space that we've been in for that long. And yeah, and you just get mansplained. Yes. The whole time. The bike rides,

the mammals, middle-aged men in Lycra, they can't help themselves. They cannot help themselves. It's so annoying. That is really annoying. It's so annoying. I had, I told it on the podcast, I went to Spring Pass with my sister and it was the first time that we've been to this particular one. And so when she said, anyone knew here, you know, we put our hands up. And then this man was trying to talk to me throughout, and it was loud in there, and I was just like, leave me alone. And then he came up to us afterwards and said, if you're, you know, if you're looking to lose weight, if weight loss is your goal, I'd actually suggest that you do this. He wasn't an instructor. He wasn't the instructor.

He was just a random man cycling beside me. And I was very presumptuous of him to. How presumptuous. So assume that you wanted to lose weight. Exactly. As if that was the objective of being in the spin. Fuck off. want to tell him and like my sister was nudging me because she could see that I was getting really

and I actually wish I had you know they give you those little mini weights just oh sorry did I break your nose oh I'm so sorry I'm so hysterical yeah yeah if you go want to get a nose broken don't come to the spin cloth yeah anyway I did think when you talk about mammals that I could be an owl an older woman in Lycra an owl's a nicer aren't they owl I like it Yeah. You don't get to be an owl for a while, though, I'm afraid, darling. No, I'll just be a hag for now. Yeah. Hags and owls. I love that.

See, honestly, you want anything naming? Yes. I'll be in touch. Oh, thank you so much for coming on. Thank you. Well, thank you for inviting me. Very excited to be here. It was so nice to have you on and chat, and I think this will be like a really good episode for a lot of people. If we get some haggie places for a triathlon next year,

will you lead them, Braveheart style? I'd love to. I can't do Blenheim because I've got to do... You can do it on the Saturday. I don't like putting a wet wetsuit on. Wouldn't dry in time for the following morning. Oh, come on. If Daisy Grant's going to come and do Blenheim,

you've got to wear a wetsuit. I'll rent you another one. We'll all do Blenheim. Okay. Thank you so much. Thank you. Pleasure girls. Love you.

Take care. Should I delete that is part of the ACAS creator network.