Should I Delete That? - Honeymoon Special with Dave & Alex

Episode Date: January 31, 2022

This week, Alex and Em chat to their partners Dave and Alex. We get a glimpse of the boys’ sensitive sides as they talk proposals, the pros and cons of life with an influencer, and their increasing anal bead collections...Follow us on Instagram @shouldideletethatEmail us at [e-mail] by MindlerMindler is an online therapy app, offering video call sessions with psychologists. Self-help programmes are also available in the app, covering a range of diagnoses.https://bit.ly/3ubIuP0Produced & edited by Daisy GrantMusic by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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that's D-E-L-E-T-E you can get one free session. Oh my God, why did I post that? Ah, I don't know what to do. Should I delete that? Yeah, you should definitely delete that. Hello, everyone, and welcome to the Should I Delete That podcast, where today I am here alone because Alex is on her honeymoon.

We became a bit codependent there, those first few episodes, so I'm going to struggle today, I'm going to be honest. So today's episode is a little bit different. It is a honeymoon special since Al is away. And we actually decided to interview our partners. Before they left, we got together the four of us, me and my Alex and Alex and her Dave. We sat together the four of us and had a couple of pints and a conversation. We asked the boys your questions basically.

And it was good. I mean, sound quality is a bit shit because of the beers that I mentioned. And it is different to anything we've done before, but I really hope you enjoy it seeing a different side of our relationships and kind of going behind it, I guess, and finding out how they cope with our jobs and what they really think and what they really like and, you know, all that fun shit.

So I hope you like it, particularly because Alex is away. And I told her confidently when she left, like, Dave, just turn your phone off. Don't worry, I'll look after everything. I won't fuck it up. You're going to, you know, everything's under control. So I need to prove that by not fucking this up. So I hope you enjoy it.

But before we get into it, I am going to go through my good, bad and awkwards. And I also have Alex's, which she has sent me from the Maldives. The good, the bad, and the awkward. I'll kick us off with Alex's good, short and sweet. She just sent me this the other day. Good. I'm on holiday. So that's nice. Al's on holidays. She's thriving. And by stark contrast, my good is that I've had a bath every day this week. So yay for cleanliness. I've had a lovely week, but I just couldn't specify why. And I'm going to put it down to the baths, to be honest. I'm very clean. I'm pretty soft. I'll tell you what I did do, actually. I fully self-cared myself. I had a moment on Monday when I was walking down the pavement and I was wearing a nice new cream jump.

and I just spilled my coffee down it and I just looked at myself and I was like you're a fucking disgrace like just get a grip of yourself you know what I mean like you're nearly fucking 30 pull yourself together so I came home got in the bar fake tanned shaved just pulled myself together finish my book and I you know since then I really feel like I've been thriving so I was on a honeymoon but you know we're all celebrating our wins I'm very clean and I no longer have like nice rugs for legs so that's good The bad. I'm going to stall with Alex's. So, she says, I was at dinner. I took an abnormally huge bite. I was really hungry of something I didn't realize contained tomato. I despise tomatoes as they make me vomit, so I had to spit it out into my napkin. I like her use of the word had to. I had to spit out into my napkin. The waiter came over shortly after, saw my napkin was crumpled, and what happened next seemed to happen in slow motion. outside of my control. He picked up the napkin and he shook it. My discarded, chewed-up mouthful,

flew out, a bit went on the floor, a bit went on the beach, did I mention that I was on holiday, and a bit rebounded off of Dave's chest and onto his foot. Everyone seemed horrified, R-I-P to me. Absolutely foul. I feel way better about myself now that I dribbled back coffee down my new cream jumper the other day. So good, even in Paradise, still embarrassing herself, being a disgrace of an adult. So my bad this week. I mean, personally, everyone's away and I'm very needy. Like, Al's on the honeymoon. Georgie's gone skiing and my mum and brother have flown out to L.A. to go and surprise my sister because she's currently living there. And I'm just like, not okay. Everyone's gone and I'm sad and lonely.

but that aside news bad if you follow me on Instagram you might have seen this week that I've been kicking off to be honest because Adele cancelled her gig in Las Vegas the bad is not that because

it doesn't matter to me that she's cancelled the gig at all to be honest with you because I didn't have tickets it's not my problem what has been bad in my opinion has been the press coverage surrounding her situation because you know she cancelled her gig in Las Vegas because she says half her team are down with COVID and they

simply couldn't make the show ready, which in my mind is a perfectly legitimate excuse because why would she give up the career moment of a lifetime or, you know, even postpone it, even jeopardise it. You know, Vegas residencies are like the creme de la creme. It's all artists want. Why would she do this on purpose? And, you know, then everyone's like, well, you know, it's not like she's got COVID, you know it's only her team why can't you just hire more people and that's the most ignorant thing i've ever heard because you know these shows it's not just adele it's her team or everything her crew are vital and critical and she clearly can't do it without them anyway she canceled the gig fine but the fecking headlines it was exactly what we talked about last week in the episode with

jamila we said in that episode who's going to be next like who's the next woman that's going to fall prey to the to the media and this gaslighting bullshit that they do and literally in fact front of our eyes like two days after that episode came out it's happened to adele they built her up and up and up and she was our nation's sweetheart and we were so proud of her we were proud of her you know i mean it was a toxic conversation in itself but we were proud of her for losing weight and then we were proud of her for this new album and for being so empowering about divorce and everybody loves her and she's a meme and she's a good thing and she's great and she's on the radio all the time and everyone's writing about del and she can do no wrong and then all of a sudden one

misstep and bam we all fucking hate her and genuinely it's terrifying like to watch it having just spoken to jamila about this if you miss last week's episode go and listen to what jamila had to say about how the press do this and then have a look on my page at the post I did because you'll see the difference that they've spoken about adele she's a diva she's a prima donna she's gone over the top she's having furious rants their crocodile tears is she ever not crying they ask you know they're saying she's music's biggest diva. Whereas, Liam Payne also cancelled a gig because, in his words, it wasn't ready

and COVID caused setback. And nobody said a fucking thing. Elton John got COVID, bless him, and he's done the same thing. Harry Stiles postponed his concert. Lewis Capaldi, Mike Skinner. All of these men have postponed concerts. And although the reasoning is different,

you know, and no two situations are the same, the reporting on both things. When you put them side by side, you're like, oh, holy shit, there is a massive problem within the press and about how they speak about women. And, yeah, so I just found it like, what the fuck? After having listened to Jamila speak so articulately about it last week. To just see it happening in real time was fucking terrifying. So that's been quite bad. So, yeah, that was my bad.

My awkward, I'm actually just inclined to say, just doing this on my own. Like, I know I talk to myself a lot for my job. Like, I just, it does occur to me. I just talk to my phone a lot and it doesn't really talk back, which is quite sad. That's why I FaceTime everyone. No one understands why I FaceTime everyone. I'm like, it's nice for finally a change when your phone talks back. Today there is no one talking back.

Alex is awkward, short and sweet. She said she accidentally flashed a group of unsuspecting snorclers. So I'm actually really looking forward to hearing how she did it. When she gets back, can someone remind me to ask her about it when she gets back? Yeah, maybe my awkward is just doing it. I mean, to be honest, what I was going to say was my awkward yesterday morning. I woke up at 6.40 with my alarm, as I always do. And I thought, well, that's weird.

Why have I set an alarm? It's Saturday. So I turned the alarm off and I went back to sleep. And then I woke up an hour later. I was like, oh, fuck, it's Wednesday. So that was, again, I think I'm regressing. I think I'm just going back to just being like a child. I'm incapable of doing anything.

But on balance, listening to myself talking about all of this, I've decided the awkward is very much this. I'm alone. I'm not coping. Can everybody please come back? So yeah, that's that. That's me. The good, the bad, and the awkward is over.

And now, without further ado, I'm going to introduce you to Alex and Dave in this episode. And I hope you enjoy it. And normal service will resume next week. We will be back with our brilliant guests. These two will be locked back away again. And yeah, we can't wait to see then. I hope you enjoy the episode.

Oh, and I forgot to say, there is no, is it just me then this week because of the nature of the bumper honeymoon special. However, next week it will be back. If you have an embarrassing story or a question that you would like me and Alex to tackle or even just one of those things that you're like, surely I'm not the only fucking person that does this, then please send it in to our email address

should I delete that pod at gmail.com. So I hope you enjoy the episode. There is also a hidden drinking game in this episode. If you're that way inclined and you haven't got anywhere to drive today, please grab yourself a shot glass and help yourself every single time somebody says the phrase, anal beats. I'm sorry, in advance, if you end this episode, absolutely shit-faced.

But I hope you enjoy it nonetheless. So, for our sins, we have invited our partners onto this week's episode to do a big... Requested. Our partners came on. Begged. We agreed. Paid. Hasht like I had.

Gifted. We have Alex, M's partner and Dave, my partner here. And we're going to, well, they're going to answer your questions, actually. They're going to do a lovely little Q&A. And I'm just hoping that this goes well. I'm a bit scared because Dave's normally kind of sheltered from this Instagram life. And I just don't know what he's going to say. We also need to like preface the whole thing by saying that these boys have had no media training.

They do not live in constant fear of being cancelled. and therefore we can't be responsible for anything that they say. Thanks very much. Exactly. You hope. I have a question to kick us off. It's a pretty serious one, but I think we need to start as we want to go on.

Would you rather have a knob for a nose or a nose for a knob? I'll let you take this one first, Dave. It's funny, that's what I was about to say to you. Sorry, so just to clarify, knob for a nose. Or a nose for a knob. Yep. I think it's probably better not to have a penis on your face. 100%.

I can't believe you idiots are even thinking about this. I just, I think Alex was right. You don't want a knob on your nose, on your face. No, no, it's quite antisocial, I'd say. Yeah, then you literally are a dickhead. Any conclusions? Alex, you'd rather have a... No, I just don't want a dick on my face. That's my end goal to this.

I don't want to dick in my face. Okay, fine. So you just have a nose instead of a knob. Yeah. Dave? Yeah, I think on balance I'd probably have to go that way. Seems a shame that it creates a talking point, wouldn't it? Okay, this is actually a serious one.

Were you always a feminist, or is feminism something that you've learned from M and Girl Alex? This is confusing. But Alex and Dave, were you always feminist, or have you learned it from me and Girl Alex? I wouldn't say necessarily learned it, but yeah, definitely had my eyes opened to feminism and everything that it entails. I think I had a very narrow view of what it was. But yeah, I would say, yeah, eyes opened, definitely. Yeah, I'd agree with, like, that's probably similar for me, but I grew up with a single mom, and she's very much, like,

probably drove feminism in me from an early age. And then I'd say, with everything you do, I'm looking at him. And obviously what Alex does too. Yeah, it definitely opened my eyes more, and I think I'm more aware of, like, you know, just general things. Like if I'm walking behind a girl and it's dark outside, I always try and let's go to the outside of the street. Those are the kind of things I've learned from me probably. Alex's mom taught him that women couldn't iron. Like we were physically incapable of ironing.

She just told me that actually I was really good at it. And I was like, okay, great, got a skill. That's wonderful. I've never ironed a thing. But that's Alex's mantra as well. So I don't think you've literally ironed a thing ever, have you? I've never ironed a thing. Like you have. They're both a bit crumpled. But yeah, I think also it's a situation. I was one of three boys like football, blah, blah,

all that sort of sporting stuff. And you don't get exposed to it, particularly in like Lincolnshire, like growing up. You just no idea. So you're very naive to everything. But when you move, when you start to grow up and move down to London and all that sort of stuff, I think you become far more aware of it.

And definitely then further meeting Alex and everything she speaks about and then meeting people at Ehrman and all that sort of stuff. So yeah. Can't escape it now. Anyway, go on, what's next? Well, do you care if we are shaved? Like, not necessarily fannies, but armpits and like legs and shit.

Like, does that really bother you or does that? Yeah, what do you think of body hair? I don't think I'm like, no, I don't know, it's a strange one. I've never really thought about it. Sorry, this podcast may end up with just me sort of saying thinking sounds. Like, I haven't really ever thought about it, to be honest. So no, I guess it doesn't really bother me. To be fair, I don't think you've actually ever commented on it.

think. No. Like I was saying to end before it's like with my armpits it's probably more the smell you're concerned about than anything else.

I can confirm. That's the main priority, I think. What's the first thing you should do every day, Alex? Deodrine. No, shower. Then deodorant. Do I?

No, I don't think I do. I think if you had like a really strong upper lip, I probably would say something. thing. But armpit hair, I'd probably just get used to it. I actually think it's important to acknowledge that people kind of a preference. And like it doesn't, like, we were talking about this earlier, but like you can be a

feminist and still choose to shave or whatever. Or you can do whatever. But I also think it's like unfair to all of a sudden like men have also grown up conditioned to believe that like one thing is attractive. So to then all of a sudden be like, well, you have to, blah. It's like actually you, there's ways of being. fucking polite about it and a decent human being but I think it's probably reasonable

that people have their own preferences it's just what you do with them yeah you've got to go through deconditioning as well right I mean just like the way we have as well like we never saw we never saw women with any kind of body hair but now the more I see it on social media the more I notice like how I just don't notice it anymore

so yeah there was that picture of Julie Roberts wasn't there yes was she on red carpet yes the premiere of Notting Hill in like 99 or something. Yeah. And I think that one, I think I probably did a double take there. I was like, oh, okay, that's a thing. And then that was the end of my thought process.

I was like, okay. Like there was no like, ooh, she's not sexy. Do you know what I thought it was interesting actually? When I first, I can't remember what year that came out. But when it did, that photo of her, I remember being horrified. I feel like it was the first time I'd ever seen it, like armpit, proper armpit hair on a woman. And I was like, that is so awful. I know that was bad, but that's just how I felt at the time.

but I saw it, someone sent it to me the other day as part of something and I realized I just didn't even take any notice of it. It just looked so much more normal now. But it is just deconditioning, isn't it? Like we've all been subject to conditioning. Well, I wanted to ask actually, like what, this is so hard and I think it's obviously so like context dependent. But if there was someone around you who was speaking like about a woman in a way that you just didn't like appreciate or you just didn't think was respect. respectful. What would you do? Do you think you'd feel compelled to speak up or is that too difficult and antisocial? I would feel compelled. Actually, there was that scenario. We were in a

queue for a nightclub and there was this bloke being really like shouting offensive to his what looked like girlfriend and I did step in and say something even though I was, like I'm very, very slim and I'm very scrawny and also absolutely shit-faced. And this man was, and very big and I was probably going to be killed but thank me there's some police there but yeah I did step up would I say something yes if it was needed but I haven't really ever had a scenario where I've had to I don't think day's very different from me in the sense that like he will like have his opinion but doesn't necessarily need to speak it and like I feel like I need to speak it and make the other person like come round to my point of view and the way I think

But Dave just kind of respects other people's opinions that have them. He doesn't necessarily need to put his out there, which I think I struggled with a little bit at first, didn't I? Because I was like... Well, that's why he didn't have an Instagram. Yeah, exactly, exactly. Well, you think it's me not saying anything. Like, having a conversation,

yeah, having a conversation, it's not that I don't want to have it. It's just like some things just don't need to be said, but you like to say them. Okay. I do it. I massively, like, this is something that I'm learning and I mean it's like you've got two ears and one mouth and

you need to learn to listen and I absolutely don't and I've actually I really found this with some of Alex's friends because obviously in Ireland it was a decision that these guys got to make about repealing the eighth which was the right for an abortion and that's actually an incredibly like contentious conversation and it was a real time of like self-reflection for me because I was like I need to get a grip like I need to understand that not everybody thinks like me and I couldn't your Alex is so much better at like being you know having your own opinion and being really strong in your like no one changes your mind

if you don't want it changed and you're so good at that but I'm like how fucking dare you blah and then I'm like oh my God what's wrong with me and I'm like starting I'm just like throwing grenades

and it was really obviously a massive decision was made in Ireland at the time and yeah and one of my friends who I completely was like just bowler who's like completely against it

and there was this time and you just that is when you just kind of is it worth it? No it's not worth it right now in the kind of situation late in that because it happened like the you know the vote had gone through

and everyone had already we you know our side had already won or whatever so it wasn't there was no point and I could not see that and I was like and I was like it doesn't matter like we you know whatever we it's fine and and it was and it was my birthday and I was like stop you're ruining your own birthday I'm like I can't help it but I think it's good you need to have even after this isn't been made you should still have the choice to vocalise it you know get it off your chest talk about it still it's important to talk about right I think both ways like people feel I think particularly now feel more confident in sharing their opinion

even if it goes against what others are saying and all the rest of it. And yeah, others are, like if someone asked my opinion, I'll give it, but I don't necessarily feel, particularly on stuff that I don't feel well versed in or well educated on. I do refrain from probably

giving my opinion just because I don't feel it's my place because I just don't have all the facts. I just don't have the knowledge that entitles me to an opinion. That's great though. I think more people need that. I need that. I need that. I know like 2% about a subject, but I've got a very strong opinion. I'm like, you, sit down, listen to me, shut up,

and you will believe what I'm saying very soon. Okay, so this is a fun question just because I know the answer from Dave. Do you watch and listen to all of your partner's content? No. That was loud. So no, I don't. I am not on social media as probably everyone. does know who follows Alex so like I don't really have any I guess daily exposure to stories

and all that sort of stuff I do obviously get sent stuff when Al throws me under the bus and all that sort of stuff from my friends so I do get exposure to that but then I am across the content she's putting out because obviously she's asking my opinion on stuff and all the rest of it so I am across what she's doing but there is I guess what you would call a comfortable distance away from it or I'm a comfortable distance away from it so I'm not in the weeds of it all the time. And I think that kind of works for us. Yeah. And I actually want to ask Alex, because obviously you're on Instagram and you obviously must see everything. Like, I wonder what that's like. Is that quite difficult? I've never really kind of thought about it from that other side.

Yeah. I wouldn't say it's difficult, I guess. No. You're pretty, I mean, our lives are pretty exciting sometimes. I mean, also sometimes they're pretty boring. We just sit on the sofa. And the content that you create is very much your life and I'm obviously a part of that but I've never kind of had a situation where I've been like oh should she be sharing this yeah yeah um I have it has there been no I don't think but I'm I've also got a lot better in recent years because I used to when I was dealing with something like I had very few boundaries and I think probably since like my coaching and therapy and whatever like I very rarely now share something bad that's happening when it's happening because I just can't it's too much it's just a ridiculous thing to do in my opinion so

I'll wait until I've like processes so like this week I've had loads of content of me like crying um on Instagram but it's fine and it's all from like a couple of weeks ago when I was just absolutely exhausted and I've been in pain and whatever so like I it's not like anybody's sometimes like I'll get a call from one of my parents being like oh my mom I think she gets it but my dad'll ring and it's like are you okay and I'm like oh yeah grand's like that's like a week old but I wouldn't you know what I mean like it's um i think for you because you're literally sitting with me when i'm clicking post like he knows that's not my reality yeah i guess i'm always part of what's happened or the shoot that's taken place or whatever you're up to or what you're talking about the only thing i do find

difficult and this is what i'm kind of like i'm not difficult but like i sometimes think it's quite nice it's like so my best friends just stopped using social media recently and she rang me last night and she was like so what's up and for the first time in like fucking five years i could tell her and she didn't already know and so sometimes i'm like i would love to be able to come home and be like, oh my God, I had so much fun at Al's today because we did this, this and this. But when I come home and I say that, you're like, I know, because you've seen it. And that happens, and it doesn't just happen with you. That happens with everybody.

They're like, people don't feel the need to ask how you are because they think they've seen it all. And it's like, but also, I think you are, you don't, you know, we've had that discussion quite a bit as well. Like, you don't actually share a hundred percent of our lives. Like, we do have some parts. Alex is awful. I really, I wanted to clarify as well, like when I said difficult before, I think I was

more referring to, which is another question, I think that. Loads of people wanted to know. Difficult that you kind of see first, well, you see like all the shit that M gets sent and, you know, well, actually you see it too, to be fair, you do see it too. Because I show you it a bit rather than you seeing it online. But how, how, what's that like to read that stuff or to see that stuff? This was a question that was asked a lot.

A lot. Alex goes a bit fucking vigilante on them. Oh yeah, I love it. I don't love it. Obviously, like I hate it because it upsets M. so much. Backtrack. No, obviously it's awful because, you know, it is just a horrible place to be

and it's M's office is online and imagine being abused in the office the whole time, like it's just awful. But what I do enjoy is when there's a real dickhead and I can, you know, use like my detective skills and, you know, go down the Facebook avenues and try to find out where do they go to school and what are their parents' names, what are their dogs' names? And I actually did this one bloke. He was being a real knob, though, and... You don't need to defend...

No, no, no, I mean, he was just... I'm going on, I'm getting the knob. But I found out where he was working, what his parents' names were, and I then... It sounds like one of those things I'd watch on Netflix in about three years. Yeah, and I'm in jail.

And I went to court, and well, well, it was kind of worth it, but no. And anyway, so I found all this stuff And I had just replied He was being really abused in the comments And so I replied saying Tony six foot two Takes his kids to school on a Wednesday and Friday

Yeah, literally that I said I hope you're happy whatever flipping burgers In insert restaurant that he was working in I hope I'm sure insert your mother's name Insert your father's name won't be happy about this comment above And then there was no reply which was funny I was gutted, actually. I was blocked immediately.

And he disappeared off the face of social media. Oh, I also did make a fake account the other day. This was huge. We were on holiday. He just got so distracted. You can't tell them. Yeah, there was this weirdo who was just obsessed with like electric guitarists and rock guitars and stuff. And he was just continually DMing really abusive messages and commenting like shade the whole time.

So I tried to look into him and then I found out what his interests were, all the accounts that he followed. so I then created a fake profile called was it like rocking hard which could be interpreted differently rocking hard 312499 and I then followed him I had to do like a follow request and then I followed all his similar accounts

that when he went to look at me he was like oh I must know this person because they're friends with John who I'm friends with on Instagram he hasn't accepted Alex did DM him and ask if he wanted to join in the pub jam session Yes.

On, like, Saturday night. Like, we need a drummer. Do you want to come? Oh, my God. I mean, obviously I wouldn't go and meet him because that would be a bit too dextery. But, entering into slightly more darker territory there. But no, I don't have exposure. So I would say I had exposure to, like, what I was, like, she would have really tough times,

particularly when your account was growing quite rapidly, like 18 months or so ago. And you were obviously struggling to deal with the volume and the amounts of comments and all the rest of it. But then I think you went through your own process where you actually learned to deal with it. I think the difference is between perhaps the trolling that I get and the trolling that you get is I get a lot of shit from men.

I don't know. I think I do seem to get like a lot of men come for me and I guess the threat feels different because like I actually find women more hurtful. Like I find the comments probably that you get. When I get those, I find those more hurtful. But when I get the comments from men, that's when it's like I can laugh until it's scary

and like sometimes it is scary when it because I've blocked like lots of words but like I still get like rape threats and death threats and like really abusive shit and that can like then the funny bit goes however wherever possible we do find the fun and I do get to be honest like no disrespect to these men but a lot of it is just like fragility and it's like they'll send you a nice message and if you don't reply they'll send you an abusive one very quickly like it's like because you've rejected them and then they take that really personally so like when was it I don't know last year when I was doing one of my marathons and this guy sent me like I'm just a really really shit message like out of fucking nowhere being like well I hope you run shit like I hope you're really bad at it like I was really mean so I went on his page and then I found it's just giving page um it turns like he was running the same marathon because his mum was a bit poorly so I donated 20 pounds to us just giving page and I commented being like I hope your runs better than mine see you there I absolutely loved it yeah I love that yeah It's a brilliant clapback. Thank you so much. It was great. And it's weird, isn't it? Because, like, it's all well and good, like, someone, like, commenting on your post, I guess, and disagreeing with your point of view, right?

That's fine. And get it, do it in the right tone, the right way and all the rest of it. When it comes to, like, aggression, particularly, like, males to female, that's just like, what are you doing? Like, I don't know. Like you say, it comes from fragility, but I just don't understand why people feel compelled and they have this to put it in such a way that it's not once, it's not twice, it's through. You know, you go down the rabbit, all six, seven comments.

And it's just like, I don't understand. But I can literally see the pattern. Like, I had it with a guy called Gary once. And he sent me a message. But you sent me a message. Like, honestly, I feel like I could do a case study on it. If I had any sort of educate, if I had any brain cells, I would do something sensible with this. But like, a guy sent me a message.

And he was like, get a proper fucking job, you idiot. Or like, something like this, right? And I replied being like, Gary, you okay? Because they're never okay. That's why they're sending the messages. it's because they're projecting. So I said, Gary, are you okay? And he replied and he said, oh, no, I'm not.

Honestly, I think my cancer's come back and I'm having a horrible time. And I'm like, okay, this is why men need to talk about their mental health more because this is a ridiculous thing to do with your stress. And that is genuinely, and I can, the amount of times I'll get, like, I had a message from a guy the other day being like, do you want to die, you dumb bitch? And I replied being like, what the fuck did you just say to me?

And he replied saying, I'm so sorry, I never thought you'd read it. I'm like, are you okay? Are you okay? No, you need a healthy outlet. And this actually can lead me on to a nice question about, like, male mental health and stuff. Like, do you guys feel like you have nice outlets? Because I feel like Alex and I process a lot of our show on social media. I'm very much an external processor.

Dave, not so much. No, I'm definitely the, I'm the definition of an internal processor. No, but I would say that I don't talk about it enough, which I probably don't openly admit that. And again, I think it's like the way you're growing up. like family, all that sort of stuff, I think it does. And you try and be your own person, but, you know, certain ways and means, you just, I think it's so difficult to change as much as you want it to. But yeah, like, I probably don't talk about it enough, don't have the right,

I haven't used to talk to people. Because also, I don't necessarily want to put everything on out because I don't feel it's fair. But then you would say, well, that's ridiculous. I think it's really important. I think it's really nice. I think, because this happens so much where, like, this is what, I mean, I know I'm saying like facetiously, like, tongue in cheek about men not being able to have, don't have an outlet.

Like, I can ring out, I can ring you, girl, like this is so confusing. I can ring girl Alex and be like, oh, I'm having a fucking day. Like, I'm so anxious, don't know why. But it's very different for men. They're not going to ring each other and say that. Totally. And Dave and I are so different. Like, if I feel the slightest bit of, like, on ease or discomfort, I externalize it straight away.

I vocalize it straight away. I, like, get it out. and I want to talk to everyone about it. I can't keep anything in. And Dave is the polar opposite to the point, to sound familiar, Alex. And Dave is the polar opposite to the point where he literally, you know,

he really struggles to say things out loud. But when it comes to my problems, he's extremely emotionally intelligent, but when it comes to his own sort of feelings and emotions, I guess he finds it harder. But I do think that's a gendered issue, for sure. Yeah, for sure. Also, it's the way we've been brought up.

100% of like men just that you will not talk about it you don't show emotion you just not even stiff up a lip because i was in dublin it's like it's just very much a male thing you don't show emotion yeah i i could describe my process as this i'll you know whatever situation i'll try and sort work through in my own head sort of ups and downs you kind of come to a point and then i'll talk about it and this process may take three four weeks i don't know and then you get frustrated because i've not talk to you about it earlier and all that sort of stuff. But that's kind of the process. I think it's so common.

But that's the process I've always done and to a certain extent we'll probably always do to the annoyance about it. What about you? I would say I've got better. I used to never talk about it at all and I would just get really frustrated with random things and then I'd be like, why am I so annoyed about this weird thing? I'd be like, why are you so annoyed about this weird thing? And then I'd be like, oh, it's probably because like David said like three weeks.

ago, I had this thing. So yes, definitely I'm not good at it at all. M's coach, Jacqueline, and M will come back from her sessions and say certain things. I'll be like, ooh, that's interesting. I'll try that one out. And it does help, you know, certain things, not just vocalizing it, but also just taking yourself away. Or like, I love swimming. And swimming is like my outlet and exercise is such a good, like mental health space to be in. And so that's kind of where I think. Do a lot of my thinking when I swim in the mornings. But also going and seeing a therapist as well. Like I had a therapist for a while and I think that is super important it's not like a weakness it's like I mean in America doesn't everyone have it's like there's that joke about like you've either got a dealer

or a therapist on your speed doll right probably multiple ones yeah yeah exactly so I don't know why in the UK it's a weird phenomenon to have a therapist or a life coach or whatever you want to want to call it but it's so much nice it's so nice now that like I feel like we're in our and I guess probably Instagram's a massive part of that as well but like we would never have acknowledged when you went swimming before that it was to do with your mental health like it was always your physical health and now it's like I'm like babe go for a swim like and it's like it's a really good like space for you to have we can acknowledge that it's like a mental health space and that's like really important particularly we're like COVID because we I spend all our time together now which is great but it's like you still do need to yeah you still need your own shit yeah and I think also I think if you take away from the partners um like for Friendship groups, like my friendship group probably would have never spoken about that type of thing. I don't know, probably eight, ten years ago. But now, like, I know that if I wanted to speak to my mates about it, I could go and speak to them.

It's more normalised. It's more than brothers, so on and so forth, who's becoming normalized, which is a great thing. I mean, it's still miles off where it should be. But I think it's men, and it's probably of a certain age when you get sort of the wrong side of 20, like you start getting into life situations and all that. sort of stuff. But with that comes the ability to talk to people. I think that's a good thing. This question is like solely an ego exercise for me and Alex. But how have your partners inspired you? And what do you feel like you've achieved? You both sent this in. I don't even care. I'm asking it anyway. How have your partners inspired you? And what do you feel like you

have achieved because of them? Think long and hard, Dave. All right. Give me 10 minutes. I'd say, you know what the biggest like inspirational thing that em said obviously you know em launched her blog back in the day which was called pretty normal me and it was i remember we had this conversation you know em was constantly worried about will it do well and what if no one reads it and what will people think of me and we kind of came to the conclusion well you know what if some of my blog articles or just me you know chattering away will help at least one person or one person can say hey i'm not the only one well then that's success um and that was just the thought of em going out of and really sharing a lot of her personal stories online, you know, back in day dark when

it all began was incredibly inspirational. And then from there, I think the most inspirational thing that M has done is setting up the hags because it's such an emotional moment when you go to a hag event and you see these women who, you know, have also gone out there by themselves online and signed up with something completely unaware of who's going to be there the other side, but kind of knowing there's the community there. And M's created that. And it's just, Like, I did the Three Peaks Challenge when M had bronchitis. And the women that I met on there were just constantly overwhelmed by the kind of just how incredible M has been for them throughout all of their journeys, be it mental.

But honestly, like, you know, M does and what Alex does as well. Both of you help so many people on the internet. And just because of you're sharing your personal stories and it's so relatable. And so, yeah, for me, inspirational would have been, I think, you know, number one is probably the hags. Not that it's about me, but I so agree with you. Like, when I went to the 5K, which I didn't run, I'm so sorry. Sorry, 10K, which, that's why I didn't run it because it's 10K, not 5K. I was so emotional.

I kept, like, crying. Tears were coming to my eyes because it was like all these women who had previously been terrified to even dip their toe into stuff like this because they felt like it was a world that wasn't for them. and they were not just like doing it, but like embracing it and being like, feeling like so happy. There was like so much joy to it. So, yeah. That's my favorite thing about this.

Genuinely, like my proudest moment at the last year was having you like because Alex is an Iron Man like he's and you like he's won triathlons before. Like he's really, really fit. So to see. Dead fit. Dead fit. All right. I guess like the reason that these events are so threatening to so many people.

people and to men and women is because of people, in our minds, we build up people like Alex and we think that because there are so many pros there and really great people that we can't do it. So it's genuinely like my most favorite and humbling thing to see him be so supportive because it's like, like, and Al always says it about like me or my mom or like whenever we do events with you, even though you could fucking clean the floor with us. You're like the first person to say like, oh, we're all doing the same distance. Like it doesn't matter how long it takes. And like that's my favorite thing is like seeing you like not even not not not patronizingly accept these women but like fully fucking like a genuine cheer yeah genuinely get it and do it with

them and like so thanks that's great Dave your turn she got awkward there um I think obviously when um me and Al met four and a half four and a half years ago so um Al wasn't obviously sharing uh necessary let's call struggles or story and obviously she was going through some stuff and all the rest of it but then just watching her share that and sort of almost have her own therapy session over a number of years whereby she's shared that with the public obviously it resonates with a lot of women and a lot of you know their stories and just watching how she's inspired a number of women thousands of women

to be themselves accept themselves for who they are is one of the best things I've ever sort of witness like I always say to Al if I could have that in my job then that would be brilliant I mean I talk about sports all day so I don't really have that but

just seeing that and seeing what she does for other women in giving them sort of an understanding that it's okay A to not be okay, but then also to accept yourself for what you are is probably the most inspiring thing. Well, that was nice. Thanks, huh? Should we like bring us back down to Earth?

What's the worst thing about living with an influencer? Oh yeah, let's get on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The cardboard boxes. You benefit so much on the fucking boxes. Jesus Christ, what do you want? Barfonsette's toy if you've got a lot. That's true. That's true.

All the tildos. All the tildos walking to the kitchen. the other day. There's about seven of them lined up on the counter. You did have an awkward encounter. Oh. Dildos, didn't you? I did. So.

Well, yes. Could be please explain. We're all he is, Alex. So M was doing a partnership with a sex toy brand. And as they were all just sitting in the kitchen in a large cardboard box. And I was upstairs on a work call. Em was out that day. And our clean.

came in. Yeah, she was just in the hallway. I could hear her in the back of my mind. I was trying to present in this call and just something twigs. I was like, she's in the hallway. I'm just making her way to the kitchen with that hoover. And that hoover is going to hit that box. And I know the flaps are open in that box. I just know. What? Did you mean to say that? They were open. What are they? The flaps? The flaps are box? They were The lid, the lid, not the flap. No, but the flaps of a cardboard box.

Anyway, anyway. I know what you mean. It was just unfortunate timing. And I promptly left my call, honestly mid-sentence, presenting something, said, I don't know, some at the door probably, ran downstairs into the kitchen, grabbed a towel or a tea towel, pushed past the cleaner and just threw it on the box. so much worse. But what I hadn't realized

that she'd already seen the box. Well, she'd already seen the box. The cleaners definitely looking in that box once she's throwing a teetowel on it. Yeah, if you just left it, she'd have been like, fine, fine. No, but they'd sent you like the dirty weekend set. I also, I also, I just thought it would be like, honestly, they were.

I thought it was funny, to be honest, because I got off at, like, they asked. So when we do collabs and stuff, like, it goes through. like it goes through our management so they said well what do you want and I was like I can't put in a fucking sex toy order through like it goes through like April who I work with every day and Katie will see it my manager and then it'll go to I can't I can't do it so I just said I was like literally one of each yeah I literally that's what we got Dave to avoid the awkwardness I said we'll take one of each but then I was talking to my best mate Sarah and she was like just tell them that

Alex is asked for and then like the weirdest shit on the website um I didn't in the end because I was like that's going to reflect badly on me if I'm asking for like four and a half blow-up dolls please no it was the beads for me like honestly who has beads sorry who has four and a half blow up dolls I'm going to say sorry we move past that very quickly hang on they do a what is it they do a half version like upstairs or downstairs the really bad thing is that box that Alex was so nervous about being in the kitchen

is now under the bed so she's definitely seen it well I put what you should do is put put them out on the shelves like they're ornaments Dave you say that that's what I've done

so in the office I've made the sex the expression yeah the expression Dave just made is literally what I think every day when I walk into the office so I have put a whole lot of sex toys on the sex shelf

And when my mom came around to see the house, I was like, I was like, well, I need to acknowledge it because she didn't seem that, you know, she didn't see this. Sorry, is it labeled sexual? No, it's just fairly obvious. I will, I'll get the machine out, don't worry. By virtue of the fact there's a whole load of dildoes on it. But I had it and I pointed to my mum,

I was, oh, it's a sex toy shelf. And she went, oh, what do you do with those? And picked up this really spiking pair of gold to letoes. I was like, they're just shoes. Like size 11. You need to ask your son-in-law. Best and worst thing, Dave, please, about being with an influencer. The worst thing is, for Al is she's always on.

Like, it doesn't stop. Like 24 hours, seven days a week, it's always on. So that has to be the worst thing. Because that does, like, it's difficult for Al. I feel sorry for her. And then obviously there's not necessarily a time when we switch off, per se. So I think that that would be it. But that's a positive because you're busy, you're doing amazing things and all the rest of it.

So it's a positive to that, but it's negative. One of the questions was, if you could, would you hide our phones slash phone charges so that you could have the attention? No. Oh, that's nice. I think you probably would. I would, yeah. And the best thing is just, well, the best thing is, is given Al a career that she genuinely enjoys and genuinely will hopefully do for a long time. So, yeah, that's it.

I think he meant the free stuff. That's definitely the best thing. I don't get free stuff. Any beads? Any beads? Do you want some anal beads? Because Alex has a few under the penny could spare. So we've never had any of beads.

But if anyone's got any like foaming bath, bath bombs, don't mind that. Oh, you love them. So coming back to mental health, where do I do my thinking the bath? Okay, next questions. Oh, I've just got a question. Were you nervous before you asked Alex to marry you? And how did you know that she was the right one? so no i was not nervous i'd obviously taken i i was fairly confident uh in terms of what i wanted

to say um i asked the parents when we were down in south africa and i went for a nap and i spoke to her parents and then at dinner just the four of us and i was pretty half cut by the time it got round to it so all inhibitions are gone so i was fine um yeah what did you do it all with her parents there as well. Yeah, so Al had always said she wanted a mum and dad there. So we were fortunate that we flew out the day before her sisters came out. So we were there with the parents, just the parents and us. And Al went for a nap because obviously jet lag.

And then I asked the parents. South Africa has a one hour time difference. I just want to stress that to the group. I really said that. I was like, Dave, no. He made me go for an out. He was like, go for an out now. I was like, oh, yeah, I push you up the stairs.

You literally did it. It was like, I don't want to go for a night. up you're like just go for a nap owl well that's nice how did you know that she was one you wanted to know oh yeah sorry I forgot that was the second part of question I always jokingly said or I jokingly said one time it was when I knew all the other options of run out

and I enjoyed it as much as I've just enjoyed that but I appreciate that can sound rather cocky and that went down a storm on Instagram really badly yeah I had messages being like this is the I can tell this is like the first signs of you did yeah people were there saying this was a red flag Someone messaged me saying, objectively, Dave is a twat.

Oh. I mean. You're not wrong. She wasn't wrong. That's actually, that's a lot. Not you, Dave. Because that's the annoying thing about, that's one of the annoying things by Instagram. That's a, that's a, I don't want to like blow smoke up Dave's off, but that's a funny joke.

And it's like, you know what I mean? But it's how we work. Like, we both take the piss out of each other and we both like it. And I think that. can be jarring too I feel like British people get it more like we take the piss out of each other quite a lot but like in America

said I think it's like less done is that right? Do you think we take the piss out of each other more than the iron? No you guys rip the shit out of it. It's just you that doesn't rip the shit. You've ripped the shit out of me but you're not as good at taking as what you give. No. Good serve but not a great return.

Moe, genuine answer to the question was or is in Al I found everything that I wanted and made me happy. Oh! That's nice. Thank you.

Oh God, thanks Dave. Set you up there. Yeah. All the other options were gone. Well I knew was actually because we love to dance so much when we get a shit face on a dance floor. And it's the one thing.

And when we started going out and we were clubbing a fair bit in Dublin, I would just look at it and just think this is absolutely hilarious because I don't know, dancing for me is one of the biggest kind of joy expressions. All right, all right. Let's move fast that. But I just, it's one of the best expressions of happiness, I think, is dancing. And when you can do it together and you're just super happy, that for me was like, awesome.

We've never been dancing together, have we are? Partly because I think we're not grade eight jazz dancers. Although, with your drum kits, you could practice. You get some tap shoes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm keen. Can you just tell everyone when you knew you were going to propose to me, please?

When I knew I was going to propose to you. You know what? It had been coming for a while. In my head, I've been wanting to do it for ages and ages and ages. I had this plan and I was going to take M back to my hometown in Dublin and do it at a place that we always used to walk around and in St. Steven's Green, if anyone knows, since Steven's Green.

And yeah, I had a lovely hotel, books and everything, and flights all done. And then COVID struck. And I was adamant up until, like, the day before. Everyone was being so fucking weird. I tell you, like, the world was shutting down. Ireland had closed down the week before England. And like, we were going to go and stay with our friends. And one of them is a nurse.

And Alex was like, no, we're going to go. And I was like, no, we're not going to go. She's a nurse. There's a pandemic. I feel like it's a terrible idea. My mum was like, no, you've to go. I was like, what is wrong with all of you? It's just like a terrible thing.

The hotel closed. All the restaurants closed. So Alex was like, it's fine, we'll stay in the room. I was like, what the fuck? What's wrong with all of you? Yeah. And then the day came and then all the planes are grounded. So that was a bit of a letdown.

I had no idea Alex was going to propose to me. And I don't know why. I guess, I don't know. I just, I'm just an idiot. Honestly, when I tell you, I'm an idiot, even when COVID was happening and we were at my mum's house and Alex was like, I have to go back to work to go get a hard drive. And me in the year 2020, I was like,

hard drive that seems reasonable let's go so i'm sorry actually needed the engagement ring but i and then we're driving back to london to go and get the hard drive and we get a flat tire and i'm like fuck the hard drive babe they can email you and he's like no i need the hard drive so i became a member of the aa i paid i paid 80 pounds to become an a member i could fix my flat tire then we could keep going so we could go and get the hard drive which is it transpired wasn't a hard drive it was an engagement ring um yes so that was quite funny anyway yeah so then i ended up proposing in a field Which is a lovely field and forevermore it is our lovely field. It's a nice, yeah, it was a nice picture as well.

Yeah. I actually think that's, I think we met once previously, but that's when I think I first messaged you because we have like almost the same ring. Yeah, it's a trilogy. Yeah, a trilogy, that's it. Yeah, yeah. Alex, I'm like, someone said, someone asked how we met and I'm just going to pretend it was for me and you. because me and you met a Tesco's event, an F and FNF event.

We met... No, there was some confusion when I explained that to my friend Ellie. We met in a dancing class in our swimwear. Hey, she does dance. I do dance. You never sought the footage of that and there's a reason. Okay, first, this one really made me laugh. Are you both very mellow and go with the flow

to balance out the excitement and energy of your girls? I'd say I I'm probably quite a calm person compared to M like in a crisis I'm very like Are you joking You're the biggest fucking flapper I've ever do you ever want to see like a fucking fish

The flaps again Dying Flaps We're flap obsessed Like honestly Alex Flap If you go to an airport with you And the flight

We're like even five minutes late You are chaos Can I just get some context, though, because M is always late, as in, like, not just to friends' houses or dinners, but literally... I really miss one flight. I just want to stress that in 27 years. But how many flights have we had to run to? I haven't missed them, though, have we?

We love a run. We're an active couple. It's fine. Go for us. Give it for the adrenaline. You're going to go with the flow. Balance me out. Oh, absolutely. I mean, you are storming a teacup, like... Wow. No, but you are Like pinball machine I always say

Like you're bouncing off all sorts of walls In a crisis particularly Let's talk about crisis Whereas I'm just like You know completely the opposite I don't know if I told you The day we sat on the couch And I don't know what I was going on

I don't know what I was saying Can't remember what's going on about And he just looked at me And he went Do you ever just think to yourself God I'm hard work I was like Excuse me

There are only quirks about either of us that the internet doesn't know. Oh, yeah. Em has this new, new hobby. She leaves doors and windows open. So, not just once or twice or three times. She's left her car windows open multiple, five times. Overnight, not even just parked outside.

Just wherever we go. She just loves it. I forgot the car this morning. I came home from the gym. I forgot the car. Sorry, what? I forgot the car. I walked home from the gym and I was like,

oh, I drove there. Keyes, what? phone car no no I drove to the gym then I left the gym I made a new friend so I was chatting to my new friend I walked home and then I got halfway back I was like oh that was your first mistake I drove there walking back making new friends I know I've always said you don't need any more than six good friends fortunately I have 10 but that's about it oh show off I have 10 I have 10 What does the internet not know about how she can belch her in England? Oh, fuck. I can attest to that.

Em, you heard nothing. It's like, how do you, are you okay? She heard like 20%, like 10% of what I can do. Yeah, she never fully reveals the full power. It's like a bit like a Marvel movie. Like her superpower is belching. Oh, it really is. Anyway.

Has there ever been any content that you wish I hadn't shared? apart from a few times about once a week occurrences where I upload a photo of burr with our mobile numbers available on the tag which I do very regularly. No, there's never been a piece of content

that you've uploaded that I've thought oh God, it's usually it's really like empowering like, you know, even ones, there was that side boob one which Instagram didn't like the other day but the ones that I just don't like, it's not the picture, it's just the response that people

give to you sometimes. It's some, you know, sometimes it's not controversial but some of the people that reply to you i just think sometimes like was it worth it posting that picture to be abused you know it probably wasn't but also i would say that particularly in the areas of content that you both work in like you've got to it's not necessarily you've got to continuously push it forward but like you've got to continually challenge people's perceptions i guess yeah so like sometimes you're going to with that bring abuse but you've got to move a conversation forward

like you can't it can't stand still particularly in your you know the areas you both work and actually it's a really good like because sometimes when like when you're saying like was it worth it like I sometimes think that like particularly when I talk about like male violence or like women's safety or whatever

I'm like is it worth it? Is it worth it? Like genuinely and you will ask that sometimes and I can understand from Alex's perspective when he's just watching me struggle and then if I try and explain it away I'm like, fuck, probably not. Like, this is, this is exhausting. But then at some point, I have to trust my gut that I'm doing the right thing.

Yeah. The answer is it's always, always, yes, it is worth it because the topics you talk about are, they need to be talked about. Otherwise, they become silenced again because they've been silenced for seven years. Yeah, it doesn't matter about the likes and all that sort of, the views and all the rest of it. If it helps one person or it helps two people, it's done exactly what it's supposed to do. Yeah. And that's the barometer of.

content for me like yeah the abuse i mean like no one should have to deal with that but ultimately like you have to kind of move past that and go well yeah but if it's helped ex person in newcastle who's having a really tough time and actually has now found the courage to talk to someone about it whatever the situation is then perfect it's such a such a like lovely simplistic way of looking at it and i had that probably that comes from the fact that no it's good that's the good thing it's like and i actually think sometimes because i get a bit like I'll get frustrated if you're not like right there with me when I'm going through something online and I'm actually like it's really fucking important sometimes to just remember

like Dave said earlier like storm in a teacup it's like that's very often what it is because something will really kick off and it's and I said this to you in a WhatsApp group yesterday when like something like something like something and it was all like ah and then you look up and it's like you're still in your kitchen it's still silent nothing in the world has actually changed but in our heads it's this huge massive thing and i think that's quite important to remember sometimes and that's where i guess dave and like you and alex are really like important to remember that it's like that's not it's not always real yeah they're bringing perspective totally totally and i think that's one of the biggest things like learning that people are so consumed with themselves

that they actually don't really give that much of a damn about you i think it's like so important because me and you both so like preoccupied with you know we want people to like us and we don't like you know facing kind of rejection or or negativity or criticism you know you say that but i think we must be fine like we do this for a job we wouldn't still be here yeah yeah we couldn't hack it yeah i think we just thrive on it yeah and when you were saying like we're like 18 months ago when it was like stuff was going viral and i was just getting loads of stuff like things like that just go over my head now people saying like oh is it something that both of you say to yourself or think about like what's your first thought when hate comes in and when abuse comes in is something that you've you'd go to somewhere in your head and think hang on one sec or yeah would i ask this person for advice no so therefore i'm not taking their criticism when it's like some fucking loser you know good point but i feel like i've moved away from like i don't care about if someone messaging me something like you're this you're that like I don't like that genuinely doesn't

bother me anymore I never bring it up anymore do I just don't care I mean sometimes I might like hang on I don't think I get it to Weber yeah but I think what gets me now is people like saying that I've done something wrong or like criticism or like I didn't agree with this like what you said like that thing kind of really I think I have more of a hard time don't I I struggle with that more of being like second-guessing myself. But my simple answer to that is not everyone's going to ever agree with everything you ever say.

Yeah. But again, it comes about to the point of but you're just trying to push the boundaries but just move the conversation on. Like keep reminding people that we've got to talk about this. And again, people will chime in and they'll say, oh, I don't agree with that and this, that and the other and it's fine.

Like, debate should move the world forward not hold it back. Do you on balance, like, just think it's worth it, both of you like what we do like the all of it like all the times like it's just stupid and crying and stressed and always on our phone and working through your mini moon and like all that shit

like is it worth it in the long run would you rather we did something else no because I don't necessarily it's strange because I don't necessarily think about you I think about the people you're helping so if you imagine like you know weight watchers

or they profess to help people do they really not really but what you actually does does genuinely help people and all the messages I've seen and so on and so forth and that is why you shouldn't stop Weight Watchers aren't going to stop even if they don't help people in the long road but you do genuinely help it and so does them so that that's my theory like

I don't necessarily think about you guys but I think the benefit you'll bring to others so about me though think about your wife Dave it's all about me don't you know that yes yes i do i think as you know to go back to the inspiration question

like em's blog for normie back in the day and we said like if it helps one person and right now you know em's helping thousands of people and i'm not just saying that we see it to people reply to em and em and shares a message to me will be lying in bed and Alex as well like not lying in bed with Alex

because that's quite nice because if I were you honestly i think i'd be like no great do like a 9 to 5 where you can more so leave your job at the door. I think within a relationship it's really easy to focus on the negatives. And I don't mind admitting like Alex and I will like disagree or like fall out sometimes

or like struggle with the amount I work. And like it's not even like the work I do. It's just it's not even the amount I work. It's when I'm on my phone, I'm like fully immersed. And when I'm being trolled or getting a backlash or whatever like I'm fully in it. So we'll be on a walk and I'm like not on the walk. like I'm in my phone and sometimes like and I'm aware of that like just being so much for you and I don't I we still haven't worked that out like how do you like make make the balance right

because you you do have to give way more than like normal right like you you have to throw yourself like fucking face first into this stuff all the time and that's quite difficult I guess but then I don't think we stop as a couple because obviously the work coming up when, if you argue about it, we wouldn't sit and be like, well, this is great and this is great. And all those anal beats are amazing. So, you know, like, we do. Dave come up party much in this. Yeah. I definitely think we should surmise the podcast in a few sort of bullet points as

on when we come to the end. And the first bullet point will be anal beats. No, but also, like, Alex has been very fortunate that she's been a fallen opportunity to kind of create her own business and obviously helping people's great but like that opportunity doesn't come along that often right probably for a lot of people that doesn't you work a nine to five and and and the opportunity that provides you to learn about yourself and how you operate and all the rest of it is so amazing like with like london and all the rest of it you know and all the things that work but don't work and you just learn so much about yourself and as a person you develop so much more so how could I ever say oh you should

shouldn't be doing this. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, crack on. Also, you'd both be massive dicks if you were like, don't do your jobs. Women shouldn't work. One that made me laugh. One question that made me laugh was, it was very simple, very concise. I think it kind of sums everything that really is you're okay, Hans. Yeah, I mean, I'm fine. My hairline's not, but I'm fine. And I think that's a good summary. Can I ask you guys? some questions. Just simple question. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Alex, I feel like this might be a trap. If I could change one thing about myself, I wish I had a better system for my life. I'm, it's not that I'm, I'm not that unorganized

because everything gets done. Okay, fine. You always say I'm all right. Alex disagrees. No, like, you always say, because I always say I'm unorganized and you're like, no, no, you do get everything done you just get it done in your own way she's looking for justification everybody she's looking for justification i'll say what i was going to say i don't think i'm very organized i'm not very like i'm really not very good at getting everything like just i don't know i'm not very calm yeah organized i'm not very calm at these things like i'm not very good at them like even working with alex like girl Alex doing the podcast and stuff you make so many lists and i'm like i should make this and then i write my list and then i just don't do anything on the

fucking list and i'm like this is a nightmare and i just feel like i'm the most stressful person I know and that's a lot like and I don't like that like my friends like I just I never feel like I can sit down and just relax because I sit down and I just have like overwhelming guilt about all the shit on the fucking list that I've not finished writing that I've definitely not finished doing do you know what I mean so your Alex is my Alex is very boy Alex is very useful for that for me because it's genuinely a matter of Adam at this point you're super organised he's my PA but I yeah and it's like I that's something I like I'm kind of joking but I really find difficult about myself I really struggle to just process life how do you manage it I don't I don't I don't

that's the thing like I'm just so like uh like a lot but it's just I don't know is there a lot or am I just really bad at dealing with a lot you've got so much to do you've got you know campaigns coming in left right and centre you've got podcast with Alex there's so many things emails the whole time also M has an Apple 1 watch. And this is probably, I got up for her grandly for her birthday and it's probably the biggest mistake that we've ever made because not only does her phone bleep all the time, then her wrist vibrates at every single bleep. And she's

literally like a walking, constantly jerking. I'm like a dog that's gone beyond the electric fence perimeter. Like I just feel like I'm like constantly being electrocuted with like things I've not done. And it's always people chase me. And if it isn't work, it's my friends because I'm just shit. And it's not what I don't mean to because I love everybody in my life. I love my work. I love my job. I love everything. But I just physically can't do everything. And that's, I hate that about myself, that I just can't hold on to everything. I just drop shit. But Alex has a point as well. It's not, it's not just like,

it's not that you only have like a few things to manage and you should be able to manage it. Like, that's a hell of a lot to, you know, and also. I also just think like there are presidents in the world and they're fucking fine. You know what? Yeah, but they have their teams around. There's huge teams around them. Yeah, I think I might take up smoking. I'm just going to Also, as I said to him before, she got too many friends. Far too many friends. Take a leaf out. Be more like Dave.

Be more like Dave. Max six. Yeah. I've got so many friends. Flash down. Yeah. Yeah. Be more like Dave.

More like Dave. Al, if there was one thing you could change about yourself. Oh, shit. I don't know. You've really put them on the spot there. I've got about five things. Well, oh my God. I can't think of one thing.

That's the thing. I can't put it down to one thing. You can't do that. Okay, give us three things. Whatever it is. Okay. I don't like that I am, like, defensive. Like, that annoys me, that I'm defensive.

And that's something that I like to work on. I'm very, very emotional, right? Like, I do wish, like, I could dull the emotions a bit. Like, if I could, I would. Because it's too much, isn't it? It is too much. It is too much. I wish I didn't make, I wish I wasn't so impulsive.

I'm looking at the drums right now. Yeah, no, I know. perfect example foldable though it's been my the redeeming feature of the drums how are you wear how

so many wires so the drums came in they've built them and then Alex went how do I play them and I went did you not think of this when you bought them

and the answer was no yeah yeah I hate that like I feel like Dave is so careful and considered and everything kind of goes through a process in his brain

and I go from naught to 100 and then I inevitably end up regretting it. So I wish I wasn't so impulsive. I wish I was more careful and considered and I had more of a thought process before I acted on stuff. Well, that's nice.

A depressing way to end it. What? Depressing way to hurt. Oh, I know. Fine. Okay. Reverse Uno. What would you change about yourself if you could?

I would always, and I've always wanted to, and the only way I can do it is by getting drunk, but I would always like to loosen. loosen the strings a bit. The anal strings. The anal strings. Do we have anal strings now? But I am fairly, let's say,

conservative, tightly wound, all that sort of stuff. Just loosen that slightly. I think that would be the one thing I'd change. But if I get 10 pints deep, then... 10? It's a lot. One point for every friend. It all comes out.

I'd probably be less, like, obsessed with being constantly tidy with everything. I have a label machine, which M loves. How do you label M? We're not allowed to label M in the house. The label machine has not got enough. Or paper. Yeah, it's probably be more, be more chill. Yeah, I think, yeah, that would be nice for you.

But genuinely, I do think that sometimes. just for you as a person you're very highly strong it would be nice to be honest i even notice it with alex's accent when he's drunk and hung over that's when it's its strongest and i genuinely think that's because you're relaxed and that's nice for you but i don't think it's a great lifestyle just to recommend just circling around alcohol you're drunk or hung over you're truly yourself and actually exactly the same thing literally so basically both of them men's mental health is going So to end the podcast, have a drink. Me and Alex may start a podcast.

Yeah, watch out. What chance in hell. I would. I should. We deleted them. So there's the episode. If you did take part in the hidden drinking game, then I hope you've got a lot of white bread nearby.

And I apologize to everybody that you have to speak to tomorrow. Thanks so much for listening, guys, and we will see you next week.