Should I Delete That? - Is It Just Me: 2024’s best bits!

Episode Date: January 2, 2025

Today, we’re celebrating another year of lols by revisiting some of our favourite moments from this year’s Is It Just Mes! Be prepared… there’s a lot of wheezing and a *lot* of giggles in this episode. We take a look back at the best advice Al was ever given, then we ponder deep sea exploration and discover Em’s *unusual* phone contract set up. Do you have an Is It Just Me for us? Email us on [e-mail] us on Instagram:@shouldideletethat@em_clarkson@alexlight_ldnShould I Delete That? is produced by Faye Lawrence Music by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome back to Should I Delete That. Today we're giving you some of our favourite moments from this year's Is It Just Me's? We hope you enjoy and we'll be back on Monday with the first episode of our big body image series. Before we start, do you have personally any intrusive thoughts? Do you have like a recurring intrusive thought? No, I think I have a lot of intrusive thoughts. but like not a recurring one not a specific

prominent do you yeah when I'm driving and it's like sometimes I get it when I'm like oh my God what would happen if I just drove into Central Reservation

and then I get the second I even like begin thinking the thought my hands go like prickly yeah like prickly I get that right I think about that sometimes

but then I always remember someone saying to me when I was riding a bike like when you're riding Who was talking to you as you were riding a bike? It sounds like something that happened in the dream. I think I was panicking about riding a bike. I was panicking about going into something.

That sounds more realistic. Yeah, probably. I was 25. And I was panicking about going through a smallish space and hitting something by the side. And they said the best advice is if you don't want to hit something. Drive towards it. If that's where this sentence is going, I'm going to need it to stop.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. They said completely ignore what you don't want to drive into. Good idea. Don't look at it. Good idea, mystery person. Focus on the space that you are driving through. As if you're repeating, this advice is the most obvious. This is an advice.

This isn't just how you be alive. I've always thought that was like the best advice. No, good advice is going to look both ways before you cross the road. Or like, I don't know, tie your shoe racers up before you go walking. This surely isn't good advice. I think about this, like every time I drive, I'm like, wow, such good advice. I'm not going to focus on the pavement of the actual. reservation. I'm going to focus on the road.

It's a good idea. It's only just occurring to me that it's pretty obvious. Yeah, just a bit. Oh no. I've ruined my highliner. When you're driving, focus on the road. Whoa. I just blown your minds. Have a bit.

Oh my God. They should write that down. You're all taking notes for that. I don't even know where this. I just thought it was so good. Oh, God. I'm going to be sick. The thing is, it is quite good.

It's like, in a baby. Yeah, for like, idiot oh my god just don't crash into the wall yeah keep your eyes on the road when you're driving yeah

yeah thank God for that mystery person I don't know where we'd be without them I mean what are I was coming from as I was saying whenever I think don't drive into the pavement Or don't drive into the Central Reservation.

I just focus straight ahead. And I don't look at either of those things. And I know I won't go into them. This is such an annoying episode for people to listen to it. Sorry. It was really stupid. It's so stupid. So stupid.

I don't want to take it all back. Nope. No, no. You know what? No. Okay. It's got you this far. And so far.

So, touch wood and whistle. Touch wooden whistle. Mind Joe, you don't see you on a bike much. I'm not sure it gets as much. No, because I bumped into something and never went back on. You did? Despite the advice. So it doesn't even fucking work.

Also, yeah, it'd be like, obviously it doesn't work. Obviously, it doesn't work. Don't look at the thing you don't want to hit. No, I mean, okay, maybe it works better in a bike than in a car. because in a bike your bike probably follows where your head's going in a car that's absolutely not the case no no well no it's the same principle right steering no because if you look right when you're on the bike you're going to go right because you'll be leaning right yeah because your whole body yeah yeah things have gone pretty wrong if that's happening while you're driving then you know what every time we talk about you driving I get further and further away from ever wanting to get in a car with you Honestly, I don't blame you. I'm about as far from it now as I've ever been. Did you watch The Deepest Breath?

Nope. You have to watch that. Oh my God. It's such a good documentary. It's terrifying, but it is actually really beautiful and sad and heart-wrenching, but also just gorgeous and you just have to watch it. It's really lovely. But it's free diving and they just go down and down and down and down and down.

And they go to where there's no light anymore. The sun's out. It's light outside, but not where they are. Why don't we explore the seymour? Because, I don't know. Well, because we don't live near one. No, not me and you. But me and you can explore the sea together. Why didn't we do this together more?

It's a valid question, but like, I don't know really. Like we're still exploring space all the time But people just say quite matter-ofactly Oh well there's you know like Two-thirds of the ocean we've not even explored And it's like well why not We've got the time It's right there

It's easier going there than it is going to Mars Because we can bust don't we if we go too far down As opposed to when we go to space And we thrive Yeah Let me free in space Happy days Oh I've missed you so much

Oh my god I know I've really really I've really really missed it Have you? I've really missed it Yes you've missed it guys Yeah we miss you I was like bury my head in the sand with everything And like

And I've just been very excited to come back And it was so nice to come to the studio this morning Isn't it? Yeah so nice How oh my God people are going to have so many questions I know well yeah You don't think I don't know, maybe

How are you loving being a mum I've got a question I know I mean like obviously we've seen you a bit and I know you've had a hard time of it recently but like in all all in all

how's being a mom like comparing to what you thought it would be well I still like I still like sunk in that I'm a mum like when you say that I'm like what that's not I know I was just saying you without a kid

I'm like nah are you sure are you sure did that really happen I don't like I've got a child I've got a child I've got a child Like, who approved that, you know? I know.

Like, who approved me to have a whole child, a whole human. I know. Doesn't feel right. But I am really, really enjoying it. I actually, I mean, we've had teething issues. It's got teething already? No, no, as in like, Oh, bloody hell.

He's 10 weeks old. I'm just like, oh my God, is that possible? Yeah, he's got a full set coming through. He's most of videos. We've had, you know, see, this is what I was worried about. I was like, I don't even know if we're going to be able to speak. You know, my brain feels a little bit like mush, and I was scared of getting here today and being like,

I can't actually get my words out. I keep looking for words, like in general, day-to-day life that I can't seem to, like, grasp, you know? Very annoying. But we're having, you know, there's been a few, which there always is with newborns, isn't there, there's always going to be stuff. But I just, it's true that everyone's, you know,

Everyone said, oh, you can't prepare for it. You just can't prepare for it. And I was like, is that really true? I'm a Virgo. Watch me try. It's like trying my absolute hardest. I could not have prepared any harder, and it is true. Yeah, they just become.

It's very extreme. The emotions are so extreme. So extreme. There's not a rational moment. Right. There's not one moment of rationale in existence in my life anymore. Yeah. I feel like I've cried harder and more, but I've also like,

my cheeks have hurt from smiling more at the same time. Yeah. And it's a very weird. Everything is more extreme. So much more extreme. You've got so many hormones, but you're also just so fucking tired. So many hormones that got my period yesterday as well. Oh, bloody hell.

I haven't even properly, I've only had a two-dayer. Have you? Well, mine only lasted for like three hours. Really weird. Really weird. Yeah. I mean, it kind of did before anyway. Weird periods.

Oh, God. Yeah, you haven't had a period in ages. I know. I know. That's actually kind of cool. It is good. Yeah. I was excited, but then it kind of just went.

But still, it was. Like that gas when mine came back in January and then it went away again. I had it for like an hour and then I was like, oh, see you. And then I got in February I got like a two-day owner and I was like, ha-ha. And then it was gone again. Somebody buckling. Did it hurt? Yeah.

Yeah. But that's really cool that you've had them because you didn't have them before. That was why you did a joke freezing. Yeah, yeah. I didn't have them. So yesterday was like this weekend was so bad. But part of me was like, I think I'm catastrophizing everything in my head. I can't be sure that this isn't rational.

And then when my period came, I was like, ah. Yes. I might have been. It's like that meme that's like, it's the end of the world. I will never, I will never survive living. Like, I hate everything. I hate my life. And then she looks down and there's like blood in the knickers. And she's like, oh, it's like that meme. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, I have my period. Where was I? Extreme. Everything is extreme. And the hormones are what? Those first two weeks, the hormones, I have never felt anything like it in my life. Some of the selfies, I think you sent me a photo and my Alex was like, how's Girl Al? She showed him. photo that you sent me. He sent you like, I haven't stopped crying for three days. I was like, yeah, I don't know. I think she's all right. I couldn't really see her. Oh, they were so swollen. They're like happy tears, though? I don't know. It was the, it was the hardest I've ever been hit by emotions, by hormones, by everything. And I took so many artificial hormones that I was like,

oh, I'll be fine. Like, I'm used to hormones. No, no. It was like times a thousand. And I don't know, I can't even explain what the tears were. They were half, like, Dave would walk into the room, and I'd be weeping, and he'd be like, what now? And I'd be like, I've just thought that he might get bullied when he's older in school, you know? Like, and then he came in another time, and I was crying, and it was because he just lost his first eyelash. And I didn't know what to do with it.

And Dave was like, oh, my God, do I need to call someone? Do I need to call your mom? just so irrational but yeah no it's not I mean like well yeah but it also just hits you sideways yeah like the night before Arlo's first birthday I sat and it came out of nowhere and I just sobbed

I just sobbed and it's like there's nothing and then she woke up on her actual birthday exactly the same it was like I was like a part of my baby and then in the morning I was like hello obviously you're exactly the same as what you were but you're not rational but that's a huge milestone as well

but you can't get I don't know. Yeah, all I turned one while I was away. Yeah, she did. Oh. Like, you've got a baby,

I've got a kid. I know. I've got a toddler. Yeah, walking, quite badly talking. Like, she's all over the place.

This speech. But yeah, like, yeah, she wore. I mean, you've seen it. She walks.

I know. She proper walks. I know. I know for a cheever. Man, she did that so early. So cute. Yeah,

I know. She is so cute. And she loves Tommy. Like, she loves babies, but she was so. excited i've got a photo for the day after her first birthday when we came down to see you and meet him and she just gets she disappoints him it's like she just like babba she really like i know so she's trying

to kiss him so oh god's all she does and she loves me which is so unusual no child no child ever liked me your kid likes you well yes but thank god that was a big worry wasn't it even my nephew like he's all it does love you she does it's so sweet it's good vibes Did I tell you about the time that I tried to, because I'm really late in the year. My birthday is 26th of August and obviously the cutoff. Yesterday, as of the day we're reporting. And the cutoff for the year below is the first of September. So all my friends were older than me.

They all turned 18 first. I was the same because I was at the end of July. Yeah, miserable. Yeah. So everyone was able to go out. I couldn't. So I tip X to my ID. I tried to turn.

So my birthday's 88. I tried to tip X out a bit of the eight at the top. 86. Yeah. And tried to get into a club. And he noticed. and I got arrested. How stupid that I got arrested for it.

And my boyfriend at the time was like, I was like crying because I was being like taken off by the police to go down to the station. You went down to the station. They told me down to the station. They made like an example out of me. How pathetic is that? You went down to the station.

I went down to the station. My boyfriend was like running after me also crying being like, I'll find you. Like they would let him come with me. And then what? They were like, I'll find you. Nothing. Literally nothing.

He took me down to the station, had a word with me, and then I left. Did you leave on your owner? Do you have to make a phone call? Did you get one phone call? No, my boyfriend, like, ran down there. He found you? Yeah, he's not like sweaty and crying. It's like, help.

Oh my God, bless him. I've been arrested. Okay, not the guy to call him in a crisis. He doesn't feel like, no, he was emotional. No, I feel like if somebody else cried when I got arrested, I didn't, no. No, suck those back up. This isn't about you right now, buddy. Put yourself together.

How sounds like that? We need bail money. I can't believe you got arrested. I know. That's hilarious. And surprisingly, I didn't get a conviction, a charge. No. I feel like, using a bit of tip-ex on my...

Worst crimes have occurred. Yes. Oh my gosh. I know how it. It was mortifying, no, absolutely mortifying. Because all my mates, they were all 18, they could go in, no problem. Did the bounce ago, like, 9-9-9? The police were like on the road.

It was like, it was a road in Chester where, like, it was just famous. It was the only nightclub in Chester, and there was always stuff going on there. So the police were there were there. Criminal underworld. Oh my gosh. How embarrassing. I wonder how many people got away with like drug deals that night because you, the police were busy taking you down to the station. Oh my god.

A little 17 year old girl like crying. I bet you, I bet you lost it. Oh no. No, we got out and then my boyfriend was like, oh, she would try and get back in. That's like, you're fucking kidding me. You're kidding? No, I've seen too much. I'm a changed woman.

Prison changed me. I have seen the error of my ways I'm living a straight life from now on You don't know what it's like in there You don't know, I'm there and you weren't there I'm in a phone contract with a man called Gary My parents worked together We all got our phones when I was 12

Through this one guy Gary It's been 18 years I still have my phone contract with Gary I am being hugely overcharged I do not like I don't love the setup I cannot leave this is Stock cone syndrome I am I think you can leave

in love with my captor I can't go you have to leave I've been saying this for years I'm not going I know but one of the worst things about this situation is that because I got my phone when I was 12 there's a content lock on my phone

Stop it. Stop it. Have you had that on for 18 years? No. So when I work with brands like Cheeks or Love Honey or Begicated, I can't access their websites on my phone because I have a child lock on my phone. You're joking me. A 30-year-old woman, 18 years later. Oh, my God.

I always have to use Alex's phone to check anything like X-rated, like to check if my links work before I post them. Oh my God. I have to use, I'm allowed to get grown-up apps. Like, I'm allowed to download the apps, but I'm just not allowed it on Safari. And I haven't got it in. Yeah. I have, well, it's like, I can download the apps, but I can't follow the links, like, when I'm working with the brands. But, like, I can't ring Gary and be like, hey, I want to watch some porn, Gary. Like, can you just take off? You know, I can't do that? Because I don't. But I say, why else would I want the child lock taken off if not to go on dodgy websites. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Right. Rewind a little bit. Okay. Gary has had 18 years of your business.

18 years, yeah. And he's taking you for a ride. I think he can accept being dumped after 18 years. I genuinely don't know how to go about it. I don't know. I'd never had. Get Gary's number. I've got Gary's number. Then ring Gary up. Then ring Gary up. I'm, I'm looking elsewhere. But then what? What don't do? Then what? likes will sort it out. Do I lose my mobile number? That's what I'm scared of. I'm scared. No, you can't control over the mobile numbers. How? Gary could be spiteful. That's what I mean. Yeah, that's a good point. It's a good point. I've been in a very long relationship in very long time. I was asking your mom and dad. This is what mom and dad's are for, you know?

This is not what my mom and dad bring me. Arguably, I mean, 18 years on, they're probably like, they're still with Gary. Gary's got the whole family that chokehold, we're all still with Gary, no one can leave. We're stuck here now and we all have our own independent relationships with him now because the business is, they don't, you know, my parents aren't together anymore, they don't work together. That all crumbled, but Gary held on. How old is Gary?

What are you waiting for him to die? I'll wait till I'm a widow and then I can go again and you for the contract. I don't know, maybe like, I only met him once and it was through a car, window. And I was really excited. I ran my mom. I was like, I've met Gary. She's like, no way. No, I've met Gary. None of us had met him. Gary is probably like just living the dream off of all of your. Yeah. I haven't even, I bought this phone outright and I'm still in a contract. It doesn't make any sense. And no, it's not good. It's not good. I ran out of data not that long ago. I was like, what? And then I had to ring him and be like, I don't understand how this has

happened. I paid so much money. And it's like, yeah, to be better. You are the epitome. bury your head in the sun. And I love it. Well, I enjoy it. Yeah, this has come up at various points in my life. Various people have tried to get me to give up Gary and I just... I can see that that's not going to happen.

I wanted to happen so... Because I want what Alex has. I want the Vodafone app. Then do it. I know, that's all I want. I want to be able to like fee my own data and I want to be able to get the new iPhone. I can guarantee you, Gary, was it not for your money? Gary would not offer you this same level of loyalty that you are offering him, okay?

What? Yes. I'm so sorry to break it to you. I've been stood up once today. Why are you doing this, Jimmy? I'm jacking on you. Jacking. That sounds nice verb.

Sexual. I'm being a jack on you. That doesn't sound like. Sounds like you're regrettably unping me. Who knows? There's no video to this podcast. Alex, get off. No, not like this again.

I hate it when you do this. I want to eat. Oh, God. Okay, fine. Okay, M's homework for this week, dump Gary. Gary's got to go. I'll be sad. How is Alex not on top of this? He's like, how has he not got you to dump Gary?

I'm texting him. Look, I've been with Gary for longer than I've been with Alex. He knows he can't just come in and just demand that I let Gary go. He was the second time into my night. I know it's really not good. I also don't have a direct debit, you know. I have to pay every month. You're joking.

I know. It's really stressful. You get an invoice every month for 18 years. Yeah. You're joking. I know. I know. It's not great. I'd love a direct debit.

That's what I want me out for. I just want the money to just, you know, just buy, like gone. And then here's all this stuff you can have to exchange. Oh, you just put a message in our group saying Alex Garry has to go. He's going to agree with you. He's going to, he'll know exactly what that is. I know. I've been trying.

This is something that my old management, our old management, used to say to me all the time. Did they? Yeah, it became this, like, running thing. Go, go, go, go, he's got to go. I never let him go. I pulled the knob on the door in the sauna to close it. Okay. Only a man was coming in behind me.

It was his knob I pulled. Oh, my God. What has happened here? So, she's got a phallic-shaped door handle on the, corner. No, I don't think they do. So she's gone into the, she's gone into the sauna. She hasn't looked. She's just turned around to pull the door behind her and she's grabbed his penis. Oh my God. Come on. Oh my God. It's like, whoa. In you get. That is the most horrible awkward.

I think I've ever read. Why was this knob out? Why was this knob out? Why? We just passed over that. Why was his knob out? Why was this knob out? What the fuck?

Maybe it was a naked sauna. They divide those. Men and women, no? Oh. Unless she got him through the trunks. Maybe she's in Germany. They do that there, don't they? I don't know.

Oh, man. It was his knob. pulled that's the most horrible pulling it because they're not stretching I just imagine him doing like an like arching his back to be like whoa like pulling himself forward put me down

oh my god oh my Lord bless her in every sense of the world I would want to be put down after that I'm sorry I will always stand by the fact that the willies are really funny Like, hilarious Absolutely hilarious

I want a hoot Oh my God, that's horrible If this girl's listening Can you please write in with the full Why was he naked? We need the full story Why was he naked? Unless she just got him through his smugglets

You know, he might have just been wearing Like a tight pair and she just sort of got the lot, got the package. Rather than just the... What happened directly after this? We need more. Did you say something? Did he say anything?

We need much more. Did you both sit and saw her after that? Oh my God. Hi girls. I feel they need to shed my awkwardness from me and inflict it on other people as soon as possible. So I can just... So I can die, just a tiny bit less

and share the pain. Okay. Last night, my friend and I went to an open-air pool event for the meteor shower where you could hang out

in the pool and watch the sky in the hope of seeing some meteors. Sounds wholesome, right? Yeah. She said this yesterday. Where was there

a meteor shower? I've seen it. I've seen it on Instagram. People, but it's not missed it. Seeing it. And you said I've seen it. No, no, no. I've seen it.

No, but people have seen it. And I've seen people see it. I've seen people see it. On Instagram. Whoa. Well. We were in the pool and doing a few half-hearted lengths

to keep us warm whilst the sun was setting and it was getting darker if she got in early I would have waited for sunset before getting in if you're waiting for a meteor that is night time behaviour

anyway Also Meteor's like dinosaur extension shit I wouldn't wait outside for a meteor I'd wait like in the base if I knew there were fucking meteors flying around last time

I wouldn't have been sleeping so sadly Also why would the pool warm you up No no she's moving to warm up She's cold in the pool Sorry right okay We were nearing the deep end of the pool when I felt someone else's foot under me and I said, ooh, a foot.

No. I saw a teenage boy treading water in front of me and assumed I had kicked him. He looked at me with a strange horror on his face and I saw he was a little too far from me for it to be his foot. No. I looked down and exclaimed,

OMG, a whole human. As I realized I had swam over the top of the boy's dad who was underneath the water. The entirety of this little. Middle-aged man. Oh my God, she's beaching him. The entirety of this middle-aged man began trying to come up for him.

Oh, no. And put his head square between my legs. No, no, no. I choked to try and move away and give him room, but this just resulted in him beginning to rise up through the water with the back of his head skinning all my thighs. Vagina and stomach Before I could get away

I hate this My friend and I died As we quickly slammed From off As he laughed As he laughed and apologised Once he'd managed to escape the inside of my actual thighs To get some air

We saw some meteors and had a lovely time But this night will always be known As a time a middle age man Almost forming like a hat In a swimming pool Love the pod thanks for allowing me to share my shame. Oh, we like a hat.

It's like a double deck of people. That's so bad. She's like a torture shell. Oh my God, a whole human. Did you say she's like his chair is tortoiseshell? I would have fucking die. What a horrible encounter. Horrible.

I don't know who it's worse for you or him. It's way. worse for her. Are you kidding? He's like, don't, don't. I mean, he was probably dying. I need to ask you. I'm drowning. I already know what the answer is. Would you rather be in someone's way or have someone in your way? Have someone in my way. Quite right. Quite right. Yeah. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. You're right. And you're not just stopping in from my getting from 80, but you're stopping him from breathing with your body. I'm so sorry. I'm the worst.

And she was getting into the deep end as well. So it's not like, she's like, oh, I'll just write myself. It's like, no, no. It was probably panicking. I'd be banning him. Does the water not see through? Yeah, how deep? No, it's getting dark.

How deep was he? What were you doing down there, bro? Like, yeah, no. I don't want a victim blame, but I feel like there's some guilty parties. Do you guys know how many people? People fancy Shrek. Go on. But, no.

I get that. No, I do get out. I'm not. Hot news statistics out from the home office Newcove have done a poll 1 in 5 I think it's a lot of people there you know Like I keep seeing like TikTok

Like daddy like daddy Like like TREC like Daddy Yeah I get that I get that I do want to kingshame you But what the fuck Why?

I can't Hold me through it Is it the fact that he's green? Is it the fact that he lives in a swamp? No. No, it's like he's He's like big and like gruff and And like rugged and like

He'll tell you how it is He doesn't mince his words And he just doesn't care about how he and he's just, you know, it's just, you know, bar. It's just a track, is it? Should I delete that as part of the ACAST creator network?