Should I Delete That? - Is It Just Me: Black tie and bisexuality

Episode Date: July 13, 2022

In this week’s Is It Just Me? the girls discuss how to dress for a black tie event (with VERY differing views), Em's premium karaoke set up and a listener asks about coming out as bisexual when in a long term heterosexual relationship...Al suggests checking out Alicia McCarvell who recently came out as bisexual and is happily married to her husband.Follow us on Instagram @shouldideletethatEmail us at [e-mail] & edited by Daisy GrantMusic by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello. Hi, hey, the introduction. You're supposed to practice. I know. You have the car journey. I know, but every time you look at me with that microphone, you go, hello, I'm like, her. It's the eye contact. My big, pink phallic microphone. Look at me dead in the eyes. Hello. Hello, Alex. I actually, okay, I've got an issue. just me. Actually, this is extremely niche, so maybe not. But like, whenever I hold a microphone, see, very niche.

And I've only done it, like, I've literally about five times. You're speaking as if you're not speaking to the nation that love karaoke, but okay, carry on. Yeah, you're the only one that holds a microphone. Because I'm such a big deal. When you're holding a microphone, does it just feel wrong? It feels so phallic. You're obsessed with the phallic nature of it. I think it feels wrong from the, because, okay, right, I'm.

just going to confess something to you okay i'm going to embarrass myself okay because that's what you do when you have a podcast in like 2002 or thereabouts my parents got me for christmas the coolest karaoke machine you have ever seen like it was big like it was it was boom box size like it wasn't little it was a big karaoke machine it took cassettes and it took CDs and it showed the lyrics to the songs that you were doing not only that but it came with a microphone no no it came with two black microphones with gold like heads oh classy like it was so classy unbelievable like all my friends were out there with their little like grey and pink ones and i liked it but i felt well unfortunately it was so good i i i don't think it was meant it was meant to

for somebody like me. I think I might have been more comfortable as it transpires in the realms of the grey and the pink ones with the stickers and like, do you know what I mean? I think mine was for people not like me and I can't sing. That's what I'm trying to get at and it was and it was too good for me. It was way too good for someone that couldn't sing. It just, it was like, because anyone that looked at it would be like, whoa, that's a pretty amazing piece of kit you got there and I'll be like yeah thanks and then like it didn't look like I did it recreation me like all my friends it looked like I didn't like with the big dogs you turned up looking like Billy Big Bullocks and then you opened your mouth yeah so my friends would come to the house and would do I'd be like

yeah let's do karaoke and then it would be like Nelly Fittado I'm like a bird absolute anthem classic yeah and it was just kind of a bit sad anyway I think my awkwardness with a microphone stems from that because I'm holding this Billy big bollock microphone that's black and gold and that was saved for like the Whitney Houston's of this world and I somehow ended up with it in my possession and I wasn't worthy and I've always felt like I'm still holding an imaginary microphone in front of my face and I've always felt like a bit of a knob now whenever I hold one because yeah I'm sensing that I can I can feel your awkwardness I'm going to try and find the photo of it.

It was huge, Al. And, like, I think, you know the ones I mean that, like, all, like, everybody had. The fun, the recreational karaoke machines, chill, a bit shit. Yeah, yeah. Like, nondescript. Well, just, yeah. And yours is bejazzled. It was just too good.

It was just too good for me. I don't like that because it just makes me feel, like, I feel the awkwardness of, like, being overdressed. Or, like, too dressed up for a party, you know? Would you rather be overdressed or underdressed or underdressed any day? Are you kidding? Nope, underdressed. Are you kidding? No, I'd rather be underdress for sure.

Right, okay, right, so my wedding, like we're having a beautiful day. I'm in a stunning dress. It's huge, best day of my life, and you'd rather be in jeans than a nice dress. Well, no, because if I was in a nice dress, I'd just be reasonably dressed. No, but like a really nice dress. But like a ball gown? Yeah. I'd rather be in jeans.

I'd rather you weren't there No, I'm kidding Actually, I don't know if I am That's insane That's so fun Imagine like the shape Like at least if you're If you're wearing jeet

If you're underdress You can kind of blend into the background A little bit You're a bit more nondescript It's kind of like You can be glossed over But if you turn up in a ball gown Like a big puffy ball gown

Do you own a ball gown? I don't own a ball gown No No, I don't think I've ever worn one actually No No I don't, maybe we should, maybe we should get gowns. Well, I've actually got a black tie wedding this weekend.

No, but that's not a gown thing. No, but it's full length, which I do find quite challenging. Wait, you're going to, they've told you you have to wear a full length black tie outfit. Well, that's black tie, isn't it? Black tie's full length, isn't it? Okay, so I think I might have fucked up because I went to a black tie wedding not that long ago and I did not wear full length. Did other people? No.

Oh, I thought, my sister did. I thought that's what black tie men. I just think it means formal. I hate dress codes. Well, simply put, black tie for women best translates as long. Oh, no, I need to write my French, a apology. Yeah, but I'm sure, I'm sure in this day and age you can get away with like a midi. Were you wearing a midi?

No, no, no, no, okay, okay. Oh, my God. No, it was like, it was sequined. It was a sequent. It was red, it was a red sequin, I'd say, the red sequin rickso dress. Like, it would be way too dressing for anybody else's wedding. You rented it.

Yeah. So I wouldn't have worn it to like a daytime wedding. Yeah. Because it was too nice, like too smart. I'm sure it would have been fine. I mean, they're probably still talking about you, but they let you in. 100% they're still talking about me. I just think as long as you don't turn up in white, like it doesn't matter.

you know so yeah the god how embarrassing okay so i i fucked up that wedding attire right so what are you going to wear so i i am going to wear do you know what i god i am so easily inflated okay another is it just me i'm actually just going to come in my own today because i got too many of my own is it just me or i don't actually know how to formulate the rest of that do i get easily influenced do you get or is it just me or do people does everyone get extremely just one get easily influenced okay there you go does one get very easily influenced by anything and everything on Instagram because I but I literally have to stop myself

from buying everything that people share. I want it all. That is because you are literally the most impulsive person I have ever met in my entire life. Yeah, I am learning, you know, and I'm less so now. I'm buying less. But I used to buy so much and send it all back

because it just didn't work. But anything that anyone shares, I just want to buy. Do you do that as well? Are you influenced? yeah there's loads of things I want but I don't have your impulsiveness at all I had the other end of the I have the other end of the spectrum totally so I'll see something that I really want I'm like oh my god it's absolutely stunning and I'll go through put it in my basket get all the way through and then I'll be like I'll come back to this later and I've literally got over 500 tabs open on my safari because I have so many things I think I want and then I don't get so it takes me like I either have to buy something like on Amazon like it immediately, or I'll probably never buy anything. So, in theory, yes.

Okay. In theory, yes. I get very easily influenced. But I don't, I'm influenced to be interested, but not to actually purchase. It's weird, actually. But I'm not very good at spending money, like on anything. I love renting dresses. That's why I like renting dresses.

But I remember one time. So Alex was, Alex's best friend's wedding just before Christmas. My rental dress didn't show up. And I was like, oh my God, what am I going to wear? Like, this is like a really important wedding. Do you know what I mean? And my dresses didn't show up. And I ended up buying myself.

And I cannot tell you the spin that this sent me into. But I had to buy a dress, like an emergency dress for this wedding, because I couldn't rent one, which is what I like to do, because I don't like spending a lot of money on clothes, but I don't like fast fashion, particularly, and I'm really trying to make a conscious effort. Anyway, so I was like, okay, well, I'll have to buy something that I can rewear or maybe I could rent out myself. and I got in this massive panic and I ended up buying, in London you can buy from Matches.com

and you can get it same day delivery so I had to go to the wedding that night and I bought myself a Zimmerman dress and it's the most beautiful thing genuinely and I'm so obsessed with it but I cried when I bought it because I was just so like

panicked and everyone was like it's fine because you can rent it out I lend it to all my friends So I'm like it's going to make its money's worth And it'll live its happy life with me And I'll have it forever and ever And it's so special

I've already I've had it since December And I've worn it like six or seven times Which for a fancy dress is actually a lot of times So I'm getting my cost per wear Probably by the time I'm like 50 But I just I love it so much But I got in such a spin about buying it And I get really like panicked

By buying things And very like guilty I guess So I understand your impulsiveness but I'm just but and also you have to remember Al I've never sent anything back like that is not an option that's available for me so I have to be super careful when I shop

because I don't have that option that's true actually just for listeners I do have bad option but for some reason I've just got this like unexplained terror when it comes to post and post offices and all things logistical around post so I have to say though that surprises me because I find her and renting, I find that process quite stressful.

I like that process. Because it's like send it back, but you have to send it back today. I think I thrive under the pressure that comes with it has to be done today. So like when I get like a court summons or my speeding thing and it's like, we've got to deal with this right now. I'm like, I can do that. But when I just get like an elusive letter being like, here's a bill. I'm like, oh, a bill. I'm not going to do anything with that.

Or like, here's a dress. I'll be like, oh, I'll just do it another time. time and my entire life is just me saying I'll do it another time and then just not doing it another time basically okay so you work well to a deadline if I know there's no other time available I'll make it work and my own deadlines don't work before you suggest that trust me I've tried I've tried to do list I've tried I've tried it all they don't work I was just thinking that like I that makes sense to me and I feel like that is how you work oh 100% yeah you work to pressure oh I thrive under pressure I love pressure yeah

I love, I mean, my body doesn't And my mental health is, you know, pieces But it's how we go, it's how stuff gets done It's not how you work, I wish I could work like you I honestly, it's something I know we're not supposed to be jealous But I wish I could operate like you operate And I just don't know, it's very sad But short of getting hypnotized

I don't know what to do I'm sure of getting hypnotized Oh, I'm snoting so much today It might help Well, but then I don't My mom got hypnotized to give up smoking Yeah. Do you know what? I was actually talking to someone about hypnosis today and they were like a proper sceptic and they did it and they said that it was amazing and now they don't drink alcohol anymore. But do not take my word for that because I mean who knows everyone is different. Everyone's different. I don't need it. Yeah, I don't need a guarantee. It might as well just give it a go. God knows I need to be feck and hell. But then but then it's like and it's true and you said that the other day it's like you're saying like you're jealous of the way I work but then like I feel like when we're around people you're more. present, whereas I'm a bit more like trying to stay on top of everything still going on

my phone a little bit. But actually I'm, but I'm easier at doing things in the moment. You're not very good at doing things in the moment. Like I can do like stories on the go or like things on the go. You've got to like throw yourself into like one thing or the other. Like you're fully doing one thing. I can do like a million things at once and kind of be around. Yeah. Yeah. I can't do that. Like I thought that with the stories. That's just no way I can do that. Like the Euro is like I have to gather them all, go home and then collect my thoughts and then go from there like I can't just do it on the fly

I'm not an on the fly kind of gal but you really are I live I fly with a seat of my pairs that is I am I'm high in the sky that's where I live and occasionally I just crash back down to earth and it's a fucking disaster but most of the time

I'm up and it's fine it's a pit stressful because I'm tired and my wings hurt but you know my wings are fine put that on a magnet my wings are oh god okay well I might actually just pursue this hypnosis thing

but I don't know what specifically I'd ask for do you know what I mean be like can you just help me be a better human being but then again if it's this ADHD stuff then I just feel way better about it

maybe I just ask for them to fix that I don't know if that's how hypnosis works I think your first step could be a psychiatrist maybe no no you know me I like practical health yeah yeah super practical

Acupuncture, get acupuncture. I am actually going for some acupuncture this week. I'll see if it helps. But, you know, funnily enough, I haven't booked it. I love that. I'm going to go. I'm going to go see this guy called Frank, but I haven't booked it. So, probably won't go. Story of my life.

Do you know what? Okay, I haven't, is it just me from someone that isn't you? Oh, no, you've got something to tell me, is it about acupuncture? Have you had acupuncture? Did you hate it? I imagine you find it incredibly stressful. No, I had, I don't know if it's called acupuncture. if it was still, I went to a chiropractor, basically I have bad posture and like my boobs are so big, I just think it makes it hard and then I often get like shoulders and stuff. So I was like, I'm going to treat myself to a session at a chiropractor and see what they do. And I think it's called acupuncture. It was a needle. Anyway, put a needle into the muscle to like relieve, to like release the tension. And I thought it, I was like, oh, I can feel that working. And I said, I did, you know, I didn't really put much belief behind acupuncture. And she said,

Oh, well, there isn't any science behind it. And then when she said that, I was like, actually, I can't feel anything. For fuck sake. Oh, no. I love acupuncture. And this same guy, Frank, who I was going to go and see, told me to go, because I used to get really bad headaches, like, migraine headache type things. And I know people who, like, you know what? It's really easy, roasted into glasses.

They were migraines. But, anyway, I used to have really, really bad headaches. And, like, relentlessly. And people who have really bad migraines hate people who call migraines headaches really bad headaches. So I know this, I never got diagnosed as having migraines, but I basically used to have really bad headaches that I would probably class the migraine, but I don't know and I don't want to offend people who have migraines. Anyway, I used to get really bad, like, blinding headaches that would last for like a couple of days and like they were just like completely all over every, all over my face. And it like, well, I'd always call it like my phantom headache. Yeah. And it's like, I basically get it from like halfway down my forehead, down my nose and then all the way on the right hand side, like the phantom of the opera mask. And I'd just get it there really badly. anyway I still very occasionally get them but I used to get them all the time

and I was having one when I went to go and see this guy Frank the acupuncturist and he was like I tell you what you should do you can get this acupuncture in your ear in something called your dath so he put a little needle in my ear and the headache like cleared it was really weird

and then he was like you can get it as a piercing so that's why I went and got my dath piercing and since then... No way yeah I went under the under the advisement or on the advisement of an acupuncture guy and since then my headaches have been so much less frequent that's so interesting isn't it and i put it was a little shit but i was like well at least i get a pretty piercing but it's been so good since i know i feel like i can't let this moment pass without pointing

out how you say migraines megrines yeah sorry i said a hiccough yeah megrine i've never heard it like that before my grain me grain I don't know I don't read too much into it it's cute it's a you grain no it's a me grain I like it it's a me it's mine now you can't tell me how to happen it's all about me this grain's all about me

how do you say envelope envelope I knew it I knew it envelope yeah it's more French like that you know an envelope exactly you know me I'm cultured oh yeah look we've talked about us

so much of my god 20 minutes later jesus and it's embarrassing it's sh sh sh sh sh shh i'm highly embarrassing okay so i have an entry here an email hi all really love the podcast and it keeps me entertained on my run so thank you no worries you've slightly put me to shame there for running because i just don't do that anymore but i'm happy for you anyway i have an embarrassing story that probably isn't that embarrassing but it's one of those why is being human so hard kind of things being a human is the hardest thing in the whole wide world and you just can't convince me well you know what some animals might have it worse it's hard to know it's hard to know um because you anyway why is it so a little of that i was in norway going to a public swimming bath i headed

in the changing room and they do this thing where they take your shoes off before fully going in so i took mine off and added them to the rack noting that mine looked smaller than the rest but i'm a size three and i thought these scandinavian gals are tall so they must have bigger feet right i went to pee first and on leaving the bathroom someone else went into pee after me it was a very loud pee? More like a man's, but I thought, hey ho, some women do pee loud, you do you. I chose a spot right the way in closer to the pool for easy pool access rather than the door. I'm normally quite a reserve Brit, but I thought when in Scandinavia, and I casually got changed, stood around him a little prime mark thong, you know the one, before getting my bathing seat on. I was working

out how to do the locker when a man walked in. I thought he, not me either tourist, had walked into the wrong room. Then suddenly a lot more men came in. When I realized my error, I froze in panic for about a minute and tried to hide behind a tiny locker door crouching in a frilly pink baby scene. I realized that it was only one way out. So I put my clothes on and literally had to slither out of there as fast as I could, trying not to make eye contact with all the men coming in and hating myself that I had chosen the furthest spot from the door.

For some reason, I was literally burning with shame. There are a couple of reasons why you might be burning with shame. I'm going to be honest. Like, for some reason, this was really embarrassing. I walked into the women's changing room and it was full of naked women. I love how much more chill they are about being naked there and very obviously the women's changing room. Thank God I hadn't been there when all the men were in this state of their nakedness.

The worst thing is that I checked the sign outside the door twice before going in and still got it wrong and there were so many clues. Why am I like this? I hope you found it as embarrassing as I did. I would simply die. I literally, I would, I would perish. I'm so proud of this woman for still being alive after such an ordeal. I think I'd have to say something.

I think I'd have to be like, oh, I've got the wrong one. But I best go to, best make my way to the ladies. Would you say that in Norwegian, would you? Of course. Um, you know me. I'm a linguist. A linguit, linguist. Um, oh my God.

That's so embarrassing. That is so embarrassing. Yeah. Bless her. Yeah, that is really embarrassing. Bless her. Bless her. I did that at the airport once and I wondered why the,

were urinals and but it didn't like it occurred to me but like not enough to stop me to think oh it's because it's the men's I was just like oh like casual observation like there's urinal's in here but yeah that's that's uncomfortable you fascinate me like you absolutely fascinate me but you know when you make observations that you don't fully register so you see them and you and you know like oh that's urinals that's odd but you don't you don't then like you don't like there's a synapse I don't know it doesn't like make the waiter

then they're like hang on why are the urinals here do you know what I mean that would be one of the very first thoughts that I had like I can see how this girl missed the clues

like okay big shoes and no naked women present like they're small tiny clues you take a detective to work that out but urinals there are pretty big that's a murder weapon left on the floor I'm thick okay and sometimes things just don't click

Yeah, I feel for her I mean, maybe she's checked the signs twice But maybe they were in different Because she was in Norway, I don't know Maybe they were in like I find those so stressful When you go to other countries And it's an M or an F

So you've got male or female Right But then you've got women's And man's Wait, there's some other options available Or when they do this kind of elusive ones Where it's like Is it a man in a suit

Or is it a woman in a skirt Or like it'll be like a man I'm with a cane and I'm like, what? Or like a woman in a top hat? But I'm like, but men traditional? What's happening? Yeah, yeah. Or like a G and a B, which is obviously for girls and boys, but that eludes me in the moment.

I agree. If it's not, if it doesn't literally say like, woman. Evades me, not alludes me. Alludes? Wait, that's sounding really weird. Anyway. Yeah, well, I'm very proud of you for surviving. And I'm so sorry for you.

Congratulations. also thank god you don't live there you know what i mean at least one of those places you can leave and literally never return yeah yeah yeah yeah like imagine that happening in like your local gym they'll be like oh quirky english girl you know yeah yeah yeah no drama and also they'll never see you again as long as you live presumably yeah they'll be like something really weird happens yeah exactly like they're just so stupid over there they just do stupid things all the time Notorously stupid here Yeah, exactly

Have you got anything for me? Anything for me? Anything for me? Is it just me? Hey, Amy, Daisy, Alex and M. Absolutely love the podcast, thank you and I really appreciate the work you all do in making this show for us all to enjoy. That is so sweet.

That is so nice, isn't it? Thank you very much. That's so nice to recognise that. As much as I hate saying hello, I also hate saying thank you. Do you? It's so hard to make it. well yeah because you say thank you so much and I really mean that from the bottom of my soul

but obviously I have to say thank you because of what you're supposed to say so then does it sound like I'm just saying it because I have to like you know when you were like you'd leave someone's house like when you were a kid and your mama come and pick you off on the play date and they go and you'd be the tip of your tongue to say thank you so much for the best time ever but just before you said it your mum would go what do you say and it makes it sound like you didn't have that thought on your own and you're only saying it because she said what do you say do you know what I mean that's really cute thank you so much for the best time ever that That's so cute.

Oh my God, there's so many things. I, I've always been well-mannered. But it was so annoying because my mum was so good at like, oh my God, she was like so, like, manners for everything. It was so important to her that we had really good manners. But then I'd always feel so hard done by, because I'd want to show everyone how good my manners were. And I really want to like thank everyone. I'd be so polite. But every time it just sounded like it wasn't my idea because she'd say, what do you say?

like and before we were allowed to get down from the table we always and we turned it into a little song because we're massive losers and we'd say thank you for our lovely food please may we get down oh that's cute I know so cute but then we'd like say it as quick as we could but it would always be like we'd have to we'd have to like break we'd literally like finish our mouth but thank you for our lovely food if we'd get down and we'd have to sit super quick before she was like what do you say

because it's like I know what to say I'm going to say it anyway I think it stems from that that's so funny I was going to say thank you anyway okay Did I tell you to say thank you? Did I? Well, no, I just did. Oh, did you just feel obliged. I've also got this thing where I say thank you and you put it on your story today.

Like I always, I say please and thank you to Alexa all the time. And Siri and anyone who I'd ever talk to. Treat your Alexa kindly, guys. Is it just me who, even while being in a long-term heterosexual relationship feels they may be bisexual? I'm not really sure how to go around this. Bit of a backstory. I'm a cis female. I've been with my husband for 13 years this year.

I was young, 16, when we started dating. We are now happily married and have gone on to have two children. I'm really happy in my marriage, but for the last few years, I've wondered about my sexuality. I've always been attracted to girls in the recent years more so attracted to more females than males. I feel that because I'm happily married, I can't slash, don't want to explore this side of things.

But I find myself thinking of it most days. How would I label myself? Am I bisexual? Or do I just find girls pretty? I guess I sort of feel like I'm not being true to myself or being honest with the way I feel. As I've only ever been with my husband sexually and we have a really good sex life, so it's not like I'm missing anything. Is it just me who feels this way? I'm wondering about my sexuality when what's really the point as I'm already with my twin flame.

I have, well, I mean, obviously like we're not like the perfect people to comment on that given that we're both heterosexual. I forgot the word there. But for what it's worth, I have actually had a friend go through this recently. and I just know from her experience that it is a really confusing time and if you feel comfortable to do so I think there's something to be said for having this conversation with your husband because I know like instinctively I think we think that people are going to or our partners are going to be very threatened by that but like you say you don't feel like you're missing anything and you know just because you also fancy women it doesn't mean that because you probably fancy other men like please like like my love for toto wolf is huge but I don't think Alex is like actively threatened by it but so I don't think that like your husband will instinctively think oh my god I'm so threatened because there's always been the knowledge that you probably fancy other men as well so I think in terms more of like you making your

peace with your identity it's a really important step that you talk to him about like this side of you And it doesn't necessarily need to change your relationship. It might change the way that you feel about yourself. But I don't imagine if your relationship is as strong as I'm sure it is and it sounds like, I don't think it would necessarily change anything for your husband. And it just allows you to know yourself a little bit better, which is really important and special. So I'd say it's definitely not just you.

And if anybody can think of a way that we could like explore this on the podcast or any guests that we could speak to about it to give you a bit more like, sort of comfort or a bit more knowledge around it then let us know and if we get any recommendations on the back of this we'll let you know as well you can put it on the Instagram but I don't know I actually do follow an influencer who recently came out as bisexual and she's been married to her husband for a really long time but like you said I think you're not it's not like cheating on him it's not being unfaithful to him to realize that you're bisexual and you fancy girls as well as boys you know because you fancy boys anyway but I think I think the longer you keep it in and

keep it away from your husband I think the more confusing it might get or I think you need to explore it a little bit in the open I think is what I'm trying to say and with someone that feels safe to you and it sounds like your husband does feel safe to you and I'm sure he will be like totally I mean we can't we can't say for sure but I imagine from what you you're saying and you've got a really healthy like happy relationship he'll be understanding of this and it's something that you can like work out together you know it's it's it's amazing to hear so many stories like this i think maybe with social media like we do have more access to stories like this and you know basically real people's stories and i think like the fact that that we're we're aware

of it you know we both follow people or have friends that are in this position it's definitely not just you and i think i mean just me as like a super i don't know I'm so confused by, like, humans and this ridiculous, weird structure that no offence the church has put on, like, the world to, like, just have such rigid restrictions around sexuality. It doesn't make any sense to me. It's so fluid and it should be so fluid. And I think most people really understand that, that that's what it is. And it doesn't need to be a massive box. And you don't need to just, like, parcel yourself up and put yourself in a box and then that's it.

You're in there forever. I think, like, you do have the fruit. that's the beauty of like the world that we're living in now you've got the beauty to get out your box and go and have a look at other boxes and see if they like tickle your pickle or whatever and then kind of work out where you're out from there and like al said you're not being unfaithful it's not bad for your relationship it's just a part of who you are it's like and it's yeah it's a part of what you're interested in and and how you work and that's lovely that you get to explore that together but i think like al said bringing it out having it internally inside

it i think it is going to make you feel like you've got something to be ashamed of even though you totally haven't. And I think by bringing it out and speaking to him about it, it doesn't feel that you're keeping a secret because it's horrid to keep a secret from someone that you love, particularly when you haven't done anything wrong and there's no reason that it has to be a secret. So if I were you, I'd chat with you about it. This wasn't the question. The question wasn't please, can I have advice? The question was, is it just me. I've given you advice, so sorry. But in short, no, I didn't think it is just you. Yeah. The influencer, by the way, is Alicia McAarval. She's also really, really, really great influencer to follow anyway. But yeah,

She's happily married, came out as bisexual, and the response has been amazing. And she said that her husband's response was brilliant, like he was very understanding, and they were able to talk it out together. So, yeah, I think, I think, yeah, test the waters with your husband and see how it goes. But, yeah, I think anything kept inside is quite difficult to deal with. Do you know what, it would be so interesting. Like, I'm kind of thinking out loud here, and this is a different situation, but it would be so interesting if we could talk to my ex-boyfriend on the podcast.

So we were together for 10 years before he came out and he knew he was gay for a while but kept it in and I know it doesn't regret that now, but we talk about it all the time between ourselves. Like it's a really open conversation between us and I think it would be interesting if he wanted to come on and we could like talk to him about it. that could be really interesting because I think we were together when we were really young as well and it's before you really sometimes when you get together really young you don't necessarily have the chance to like explore like fully explore your sexuality and like realize like where you're where you're landing on the spectrum and then you're kind of into a relationship and then

to actually come out once you're deep into a relationship is really difficult so again this is a different situation but we should so get him on it would be great he's really he's great as well it's going to be awkward if he doesn't want to because now you've said they're going to ask so if he doesn't show up everyone's going to know that he said no but that'll just be like a little whack at your ego and otherwise it'll be fine

you'll bounce back you'll be fine we'll just never mention it again it's fine never happened okay yeah he like blocks your number he's like it was a good there was a good decade of friendship and whatever else well that was that was longer than we expected and we only did one is it just me so that was fun right we can't say hello we can't say thank you and we can't say goodbye what can we do Alex what's the fucking point of us oh that's weird to hear you call me Alex that's weird

I feel like you only call me out now baby sweepie love of my life cockatoo I don't know where that one came from yeah me neither weird vice um also I tell you what is it just me that's got find my friends on their partner just as a final little one oh no I do you find my phones on day because look at the speed that Alex is moving right now I'm going to report him going to call the nino oh that's really fast no he's not in the car he's on a train oh right okay um that's so far yeah i think yeah i've got loads of my friends will find my friends as well yeah i've got all my sisters on there my family love it and then i can tell when one of them

wants to be sneaky because they turn it off how sneaky yeah well my sister's blocked me oh has she well she's blocked all of us she's just turned her location off which is probably that's such a sister thing isn't it well she's a grown-up and i have to respect that and then my mom and my brother both have Google phones so sure I don't have any family to stalk then so I just have to stalk myself and Alex but I like that from a safety thing he just got hit off his bike like twice by cars in like the space of two years and I was like you know what this is bullshit I've got to keep an eye on you yeah so I have don't have like like flipping to neuroses every time he's on his bike and then yeah I've got a place to my friends I think

Georgie's blocked me as well though which is just a bit sad actually yeah it's nice so my friend I've got my friend lucky I just like to watch her at work sometimes Yeah, it's kind of weird When I say out loud I'm going to stop talking about it She's definitely like she doesn't listen To the podcast, it's fine It's going to say otherwise

She'll block me too And then I'll have no one left Oh, that's so sad I know At some point you have to just when You have to, you have to question Like, is it them or is it you? Like why is everyone blocking you?

No, it's me I'm a common denominator here Yeah, I'm fully aware of that And that applies to all areas of my life Except the ones I don't want it to Like when I'm being trolled And then I'm like, no, it's not me, it's then It's definitely them.

Oh, in that case, it's definitely then. I'll give you that. Okay, thanks so much. Okay, well, this has been fun, but I will see you on Monday for a... Did you hear that? Did you just do a massive... Yes, I heard that. Daisy, please don't take that out.

Please take that out, Daisy. Nice goodbye. Please don't take that out. You're fucking rank. You're an absolutely disgrace. That's it. That's it. I'm actually not going to see on Monday.

Fuck you. This is disgusting. I can't work under these conditions. I'm done. Actually, that's just brought up, and is it just me for next week. I'm going to write that dance. I don't forget. Right.

thank you all so much for listening why did you just pick up a pen you're not going to write that down on paper you're going to pick up your phone you're going to write it in your notes you don't know how to write things by hand that's true you always do on your computer oh my god what is this a blue pile on all right let me be

just as we go can you just tell them what you did for your wedding oh for your wedding okay fine well given that like I don't think any of my mates actually listened to the podcast so it's fine So basically, I really struggle with writing nowadays just because we don't write anymore. Everything's on phone or on type type, tap, tip type, whatever.

And then actually writing gives me like major, major cramp. I think it's because I write dodgy. I like write like that as well rather than like, but I don't. Yeah, that's kind of intense. Yeah, it's still intense and it hurts. So I got a word document. You know, like you should be writing hate mail with your handheld like that. Like a little claw.

Yeah. So I got a word document and I wrote. down, I wrote down what I wanted to say to everyone for my thank you cards and my little sister wrote them out for me. You are a fucking disgrace. You put that pen down. You don't deserve to hold the pen. You don't deserve penmanship status. You put that pen down. But look, this is the Maria Tash pen that we got from our piercing. That's from our matching piercings. Okay, I get that pet. You can hold that pen. Thank you. Take it back. You fraud. You fraud. Okay. It's time. It's It's time to say goodbye.

Oh, lovely. This is why I wasn't allowed, this is why I wasn't allowed. This is why, this is why I was a fraud with the microphone. This is why that karaoke machine wasn't right for me. I know, I'm going, okay? I'm going to go. Okay, okay, okay? See everyone, see you on Monday. Loving and leaving you.

Love you all very much. See you later. Goodbye. Bye. Should I delete that is part of the ACAS creator network.