Should I Delete That? - Is It Just Me: Broad beans and OnlyFans

Episode Date: July 27, 2022

In this week’s Is It Just Me? the girls discuss your responses to last week's OnlyFans debacle. Em opens up a Pandora's box of embarrassing situations to keep you awake at night and Al searches for allies in her life without cooking...Follow us on Instagram @shouldideletethatEmail us at [e-mail] & edited by Daisy GrantMusic by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello. Hello, how are you? Good, how are you doing? I'm good. I'm excited for this, Is It Just Me? Because we have a lot of OnlyFans comments that were made after last weeks. So last week on Is It Just Me, we had a DM from a girl who was feeling unsettled because her partner was watching Onlyfans and she was.

felt that there was more intimacy with that than with regular porn and so we kind of like gave our two pennies which as ever are shit um and so we're delighted to tell you that we've had loads of emails through from other people with experiences in this realm as well so we are going to get into those but first of all i just have a couple of is it just needs to ask you myself you know yesterday when i was with you all day and i just wanted to fucking die because i'd sweated like a beast through my pretty silk shirt. Yes. Can I just say, listeners?

Owl and her sister Jen did not make me feel any better. Jen told me that they'd see my sweat patches from Oxford Street. We were in London Bridge. Like, you did not reassure me. You made my going home. I walked home like I had two dislocated arms because I was too embarrassed to put them down and just be brave. Anyway, I put on my Instagram and I said,

has anybody got any other just horrendously embarrassing parts of being a human being and I've had so many amazing entries of just things that are excruciating and something that's come up a lot and I have to ask when you go to the dentist do you have your eyes open or closed um do you know what every time I go to the dentist I think about this I'm like I don't know what to do because closing them feels a bit like like it feels a little bit like I'm enjoying it it's quite a little bit sexual but then also like is she asleep so I keep them open and just kind of look around as if I'm just like thinking you know

nice yeah like I'm a million miles away yeah exactly business deals going on in my head all the time money never sleeps yeah okay interesting so I was exactly the same as you I was like I can't close my eyes. Like, how intimate is that? So intimate. What a moment I'm creating with the dentist. So I said that and then I put it as a poll and I swear to God out,

it's been 50-50 all night long. I've been checking it every 20 minutes. Oh, wow. And my DMs are kicking off. Predominantly with messages from dentists imploring us to please close our eyes. Oh, seriously. I've been doing it wrong for nearly 30 years.

and obviously now I need like a few years to recover. Oh my God. Why have they said that? What are their reasons for that? They just think it's very awkward and distracting to have us staring at them and they don't want to make eye contact. So I think if you're perhaps looking elsewhere,

it might be okay. Because a lot of people were messaging, but what about those places that have TVs in the ceilings? Because some people, you know, and I hate having my eyes closed. like I'm like a bear If I close my eyes I could be attacked

You know what I mean It's a very stress I hate closing my eyes And that's absolutely essential I'm so vulnerable So even when I'm having my fucking eyelashes tinted And the stuff stings like a bitch I still keep to the best of my ability

My eyes open Because I want to You know If someone comes in I want to know I want to be able to find them On a moment's notice Shit man Okay so we've been doing it like all wrong

Yes I think I'm going to continue to do it wrong. The hairdressers also ask you to close your fucking eyes when they're doing a head massage. But I'm like, that's too intimate. No, that's pretty sensual. Agree. But then somebody did point out, okay, so you're having your hair done.

And she's like, there's nothing worse than when you're having it done. And then you get those kind of like weird sleepy eyes. Because that is a bit much. Do you know what I mean? She's like, at least if you keep them closed. then they're already closed so you're not going to do that like weird sleepy eye thing which is kind of like oh my god when your eyes like roll back in your head yeah well i i have to just keep like so open but but then i always say no to the head massage because i find the whole thing too intimate as it is yeah i say no to hair massage i find it too much i'm like in and out bitches yeah but i i i can't close my eyes i just can't do that the hairdressers no i tried to make i tried to make everything better doing this segment right when I do those like embarrassing segments I do it because I want to make everybody feel better about themselves and I like showing everyone that everybody's human and we all have

weird embarrassments right like and some of these are so irrational like someone someone in yesterday thing like um like emergency breaking like I just give myself the hick and I'm like oh my god I agree how embarrassing to have to do an emergency break and someone's like I got a new pair of shoes and I can't wear them because I'm just too embarrassed to have all but, ooh, new shoes comments. It's so true. It's so embarrassing having new shoes.

That's so funny. So the whole point of yesterday was to make, like, unify us all, like show everyone that we're all fucking awkward and weird, right? And it totally backfired, right? Because a lot of it, yes, was lovely and unifying. But then the dentist chimed up and I was like, oh my God, I've just created, like,

unlocked a new insecurity for people. And then somebody sent in, a thing saying really embarrassing when you're the first person on a team's meeting and you're just waiting for everyone else which I agree horrible you're just staring yourself so then somebody else sent one in saying ah clever what you have to do is leave the team's meeting and then pop back in two minutes later to see if anyone's joined and then if they have and you leave again and then you just pop back in again and you just keep going in and out because you don't want to be the first one and this so this person sent it into me and she did stress that she was 42 years old

but she does this right so I shared that thing like don't want to Sorry, guys, you're not the only one. So then I shared it. 75% of my followers have also left a team's meeting after being the first one, right? I then got a DM from a woman saying that when you do that, everybody else in the meeting gets a notification. No way. To say that you're popping in and out.

So I've just had to tell all my followers that I hope they rest in peace because if they weren't in Paris before they will be now do you know what that's so funny because I don't get that I would rather be the first one there than have to join when people are already there I'd rather already be there and feel settled and like I'm early I'm fine like I'm on time rather than like

So what do you do when you just have to like sit and stare at yourself in the face well just go on my phone or something I don't have to like look at myself but then when people join you can be like hi interesting I have no like you know people are like oh I can't be early to something like I don't I mean I don't want to be too early for something so that people have to look like feel like they have to talk to me or whatever but I have no embarrassment about being early or on time to something I don't really get that

or you've got to be late I hate being on time to stuff like I'll never be deliberately rude like if I'm meeting a friend but like if you go for example to an event or to a party you never want to be like one of the first five there because what if they're because because the first five are going to be the losers, aren't they? They're going to be the youths, and then you're just stuck talking to the losers. But then what happens, right, so you're in their foot, and I'm joking, not necessarily losers are on time, I'm just very rude and foul. Anyway, but you're sitting there, you're early, people are going to come in,

oh, hi, where do I put my coat? I don't know, it's not my house. Oh, sorry, I just thought because you were here early. Like, people are going to ask you stuff. They're going to assume, they're going to, and they're going to, and we're going to latch on to each other, right, and you commit too soon. Like, you're both early, you're both anxious, you're going to latch on to each other for dear life.

What if they're awful? What if you've latched onto someone and you're just stuck with them all night? But then when it, no, because when it fills up but when other people start coming in, you can't just sit the two of you together. Do you know what I mean?

Like, there's tons of opportunity to spread your wings. But what if you don't know anyone? I've just, you just latched. Like a barnacle. Oh, gosh, social relaxing is just so uncomfortable. But like, I, this is my, it just me, just for you. The other day, I was on the ferry,

coming back from the Isle of Man, and I was sat opposite this woman, I was desperate for the loo and I was literally two feet away from the loo, like couldn't have been closer and I was like, it's too embarrassing just to get up and go to, it's too close so I was really trying to sight my, I was desperate for a wheel

I was just trying to sike myself up and I was sitting next to this lad and then he went to the loo and I was like, okay I was like okay, you know that was normal that was fine, sat back down again and I was literally just about ready to go and then the woman opposite we got up and went and I was like, oh no, like I can't go now

because she's gone but then I also can't go like immediately when she gets back because she'll just think I've copied her so I'm done in now so I just have to sit there and she got back and I was like I wait for her to like you know then you get back and you've got her like oh god I'm sitting on my book

whoops around my glasses and I had to really wait for her to like settle back down and get back into what she was doing completely immersed in her daily mail God help her and only then I could go and I still couldn't find the right time I must have left 40 minutes between her sitting back down and me going since she thought it was my original

idea and I didn't just copy her. That's so funny. She was well onto the sports pages by the time I went for a week. There was a lot of thinking involved in that toilet trip. There was a lot of thinking involved in my life. I mean same, but like

possibly in different situations. But I used to feel that about when you start a new job and you have to go to the toilet and you feel embarrassed and uncomfortable because you're not like settled yet. You don't feel like at ease with everyone. And like to just get up and like make your way to the toilet and you have to like get up and then walk

and walk past people and it's like do you acknowledge oh got to go the loo yeah do you say oh need a wee no don't do that it's just it's very embarrassing when you've been there for a while you can sort of like finger guns people on the way back like hey height height you know and it's like it's just oh there's them just go for a wee love it when she's up and about yeah but when it's a new kid it's just like it's embarrassing it's embarrassing it's just being a human being so embarrassing oh my god one one person sent in an entry saying that her false fingernail fell off on the tube and a guy passed him back to her oh my god oh my god that oh that reminds me of when i used to wear extensions and they were like buns so there's like probably like i'd call it i'm going to exaggerate by 70 all over

your head but like there's a lot of them in your head right and sometimes so like every so often they just fall out like maybe they were just weren't a strong one or whatever um and it happened to me on the tube i was like running my hands through my hair and as i like pulled them through and got to the end of my hair like it just kept going and i like pulled out this big extension and it was absolutely mortifying because the extensions were super long and i was like trying to like tangle them up in my hands so like trying to like scrunch it in my hands so like no one could see but i mean let I mean, it was extremely obvious and a very busy tube

and I was just like, I might as well just wave this wafed of hair around, so that was uncomfortable. With it like a flag. Oh my God, I hate being a human being. Do you think dogs get embarrassed when they like trip over? No, I think dogs just give absolutely zero fucks,

which is amazing. I think Bua gets a bit embarrassed like, but when I watch her do something, like she fell off the sofa the other day and then just got really like shady and just went up to bed. I couldn't look at me I was like yeah quite right that was embarrassing

that's really cute I know she's adorable okay only fans so these are all sent with love and we've just picked a few of the entries that we had right a few of the emails that we had so it says hi Alex and Emma I just seem to your last is it just me episode

and I wanted to respond to your only fans discussion I'm in a long term committed an open relationship so I guess I might have somewhat different perspective on the topic to the girl who wrote the original email, I just want to pose a friendly and hypothetical question. What if you decide to be okay with your partner looking at girls on OnlyFans? What is the worst that could happen?

Allowing some freedom for your partner will likely lead him to desiring you even more in my experience, but it could also mean more freedom for you as well. Maybe you have no desire to browse on Onlyfans, but maybe there's something else that appeals to you. Some innocent flirting with a bartender or barista. I love saying that word. I think you mentioned you've only been together for a year, but imagine 10 or 20 years down the road. I can feel, oh, you're like toes curling up. I'm like reading this. What's Dave going to be doing 10 years with a barista? It's nice to be able to still feel desired by other men, in my opinion, without breaking any boundaries, just a thought. I also just want to say that the big difference between you

and the girls on only fans is that he doesn't have a deep connection with them like he does with you. He doesn't laugh with them, share memories with them, care for them, love them, or have interesting conversations with them. But with that said, I completely understand feeling like I don't look like her. So if you're attracted to her, how can you say you're also attracted to me? I think for us women, especially, it's really hard not to compare ourselves to other women. Even though I'm in an open relationship, I still feel jealousy at times. But I also know that jealousy is just a feeling like any other feeling, sadness, happiness, for confusion that I'm allowed to experience, but that I can also work through and challenge. What I would have told myself

in your situation is this. Even if you were Jessica Fricken Alba, your boyfriend will still look at tons of other women and find them attractive. If you have a Pomeranian dog that you love and adore, you can still find a Great Dane cute. And even if you love chocolate ice cream, you might still crave strawberry or vanilla or even pistachio once in a while. It doesn't mean chocolate isn't still your number one. Three, you are unique. There is literally no one else in the world like you and he is lucky to have found you. With all of that said, though, you obviously do not have to be okay with him looking at other girls online. You have to listen to your own gut and heart and do what feels best for you and set the boundaries you feel comfortable with.

Okay, I feel like I could go on forever on this topic, so I need to cut myself off, but not before I tell you to how much I adore your podcast. It helps me feel strong when I didn't think I had any strength. It's helped me make a career change I didn't think I was ready for and it's made me feel confident in my femininity. I love you both. Oh my God, I love you. I wasn't expecting that at the end there. Oh, that's made my day. I'm crying. Oh my God, thank you. What an amazing message as well. you could say that is an amazing message. Yeah for sure and that is I mean all of those analogies as well as spot on I guess for me like the pro I think like while I know all of that is true and makes total sense I think like maybe it's but like making that like real in my own head

like on an emotional level I guess would probably be a lot harder than on an intellectual level yeah I think like I think a lot of what she's talking about there kind of goes like beyond the only fans thing into jealousy in general and I think the advice there is very helpful in that it's like jealousy is a feeling and it is something that a lot of us will experience and kind of the fact that you're feeling it about only fans probably means that you would feel it about other areas in your life so maybe it's a good thing to address it yourself and that doesn't mean not having boundaries and it doesn't mean like this girl says it doesn't mean you have to be okay with only fans but perhaps to address your own jealousy it's just something that's going to bring

you more comfort anyway and it's not you're not bad for feeling it it's not wrong for feeling it um yeah but it might give you a bit more like comfort but then i still don't know where i lands on any fans what has anyone else got anything yeah so i've got one here um hi all of course i love the podcast i've been hooked since day one i can no longer listen in the gym because i just laugh out loud too much and get funny looks love that um i'm listening to this week's is it just me episode where you read out the only fans email and it's really made me question myself so i thought i'd write in with my own Is it just me? Is it just me that doesn't see anything wrong with a partner watching only fans and porn?

In that example, I understand that she asked him not to as a boundary, but is it just me that thinks that's problematic? For context, my partner doesn't watch porn or use only fans, and I have always found it more strange than anything. Whereas I used to watch a lot of porn or what I perceive to be a lot based on speaking to my friends who didn't at all. And when we got together, I stopped wanking. Sorry, that came as a surprise.

I wasn't expecting that word, sorry. You are a child. I'm such a child. We're trying to talk seriously about porn and relationships and you can't even say the word wanking without a giggle. Now six years in, I'm thinking, why did I do that? For me, it is totally different to wanting to have sex with my partner so one doesn't replace the other.

I read a lot of erotica and enjoy watching normal films with sex scenes in and it had not occurred to me that it might be making him feel inferior because it has nothing to do with him. If my partner said to me that I couldn't do these things anymore, I think because it's a man telling a woman, it would be perceived as controlling and problematic, but for women it seems to be okay to shame men for the content they are consuming.

I might be really overthinking this and going too deep, but I just worry that the shame around being open is more damaging. Oh my God, that's a lot to think about. Fuck, that's a lot to think about. Wait, let's just unpack that a second. Because I don't think it's problematic. I just want to stress that off the bat. You've said use the word problematic.

I don't think it's problematic to create that boundary in your relationship to say this makes me uncomfortable. And I don't think the original poster, the original sender was ever saying, oh, I don't know. Oh, God, I don't know. Okay, so if we had two emails,

one from a woman saying, I've asked my partner not to watch porn and he still is. And then we had an email from a man saying, I've asked my girlfriend or wife not to watch porn and she's still it. Sorry, I've got, oh fuck, I don't know. I don't know. Maybe there is a bit of a double standard there. Do you think, I don't know if I would, like, I think if a man felt that his wife or partner

watching a lot of porn made him feel inferior or upset or insecure, I don't think I would perceive his wanting her to stop as controlling. I think it would be a similar thing of, like, you don't want to hurt the person that you're with. Yeah. And I tell you what, I do find problematic, a bit of a tangent, but I guess it is that double standard that's being referred to. Like, I know you don't watch TikTok a lot, but, like, quite often I'll see these, like, videos of, like... I love TikTok. I'm on it all the time.

I, like, I literally get to me to sleep. So, you might have seen them. There's a lot of videos of, like, when boys go out, like, when, when it's, particularly in the summer, it's, like, lads holidays. And there's, like, girlfriends putting pictures of themselves on T-shirts and making their boyfriends wear them. I'll see videos of girls like videoing themselves with the boyfriend and being like did anybody see him in Iron Apper

like need to check that I can trust him before I let him back into the house and there's a lot of this like and it's kind of a joke but like you know hands off his mind and like making sure he didn't cheat and all this and I'm like if that were the other way around it would be fucking gross

like a girl going on a holiday with a boy being on a t-shirt being like hands off she's mine or like not letting her back into the house until TikTok said that no one fucked her while that she was in iron app or whatever so like I find that stuff very controlling like sorry not controlling I find that stuff like to be a huge double standard and there is this kind of like trope of like crazy girlfriends that does seem to be completely societally accepted where if it were the boyfriends it wouldn't be okay at all but then I don't think in adult healthy

relationships where somebody lays a boundary down, like, because obviously most people have the boundary of like, hey, don't go shagging someone else in Inapper, and we don't need to put it on a t-shirt and make it into a TikTok video because we can respect the human adult that we're with enough that they'll just not fuck someone in Inapper, and not just because of the t-shirt. But I think like it's more kind of like personal and private between you and for you guys to make that boundary within your own relationship, whether it's coming from a man to a woman or a woman to a man is kind of fair enough and it's the broken trust that's the problem not necessarily the porn in the first place it's like if you know because we can do the most

innocuous shit in the world like if you know that whistling really upsets your partner just don't whistle like okay it's a bit annoying but like it's kind of spiteful then just to walk around whistling even though you know they hate it you know oh it's so tricky this is so tricky but if you can't live without whistling, like if whistling is just a complete passion project of yours, then you need to leave this person and whistle with somebody else. Oh, this is really tricky. This is really hard. Okay, could I read another one?

Yeah, sorry, I'm still thinking. Hi, everyone. Thank you so much for you on this podcast. I've never needed the podcast more, the validation I received from listening to everyone's stories are second to none. The comfort that comes from knowing that other people are going through experiences similar to your own and understand what you're going through is the warmest feeling you could ever have. You often keep me company whilst baking. It's the most fun I have. Oh my god. That's so

nice. Why am I crying? I love baking. I never bake. I'll never bake. I never. I can't bake. Obviously you don't bake. Have you met your kitchen yet? Um, the is it just me on this week's episode about only fans really resonated with me. When I started listening, I actually checked my emails to make sure I didn't send it myself. The night previous to listening, to this, I found out my partner had an account with them for the first year and a half of our relationship and he was subscribed to girls from his hometown. I remember something coming up about only fans early in our relationship and he said he'd never been on it. He didn't see the point in it and didn't feel the need to go on it. Now he was with me. I'm a sex positive

person. I don't mind that he watches porn. In fact, I have pointed him in the direction of some websites that are more ethical than the ones he used prior to our relationship. However, I spoke about my discomfort about only fans and how I viewed it as being unfaithful as it's much more intimate than watching random videos. He agreed he felt the same way and said he would feel hurt if he thought I was interacting with other people on a more personal level, especially people that lived in the same town as me. We've been together three years now and I can't get over the fact he's kept this from me for a year and a half. He said he deleted his account and has not been on it since but I don't know if I believe him as he has lied various times before.

I feel so hurt and betrayed, especially because we set clear boundaries about this exact subject early on. I don't know what I'm more upset about the lying, the act of interacting with them, or the fact he still went through with it, knowing how hurt I would be if I ever found out. The girls he was subscribed to had clearly had a lot of plastic surgery and were very skinny, something he has always claimed he didn't find attractive. I have struggled massively with body dysmorphia and disordered eating for a long time, mainly due to a previous emotionally abusive relationship. I really felt like I was making progress and this has totally set me back.

I can't help but think that he does not find me as sexually attractive as those girls, and that's why he's found the need to seek them out. I really feel for the person that's sent in their stories, I can completely feel what they're feeling. My partner also can't express his reasoning for doing it, which is difficult as I can't try to understand if he doesn't understand himself. I don't have any advice to offer the person who's sent in their story, but I do hope this gives them some comfort in knowing someone else feels the same way,

sending all my love to the beautiful person that shared their experience, anonymous. See, this is tough because this feels more clear, cut in that she's saying like you can watch porn you're allowed to watch porn and like here are some websites and blah blah but like I'm setting the boundary of something that feel and I don't I don't this is I'm saying this as someone who's absolutely fucking clueless about stuff like this and about like non monogamy but that to me feels like it's leaning more towards that and like interacting with someone and like it just feels a little bit more intimate and so I think that is quite clear cut to me like that's tough and especially if he's lying to you

about it. That's really hard. I agree. All I would say for this is the second part where you talk about your body and your natural comparison to these women is definitely the first email that I read out where the sender made very good points about how you can love chocolate ice cream but still eats strawberry ice cream or you can have a Pomeranian but still like a Great Dane and just go back and listen to what she said again because that's very true and we said it last week yeah this isn't because you're doing anything wrong it's not because there's anything wrong with your body you're a fucking goddess you're great and this is nothing to do with you he's doing this and it is nothing to do with you or your beautiful body so you have to hold on to that and and you can completely

be furious and upset that that boundary has been crossed but don't don't hurt yourself in the process because it's got nothing to do with how you look. So we can be furious with him for pushing a boundary, but don't be upset with yourself because it's nothing to do with your body and you haven't failed him in any capacity. So I just want to make that clear. Yeah, for sure.

And also, big hug, because, I don't know, this stuff is hard. It's hard to deal with. And like, like I said before, it's like, it all makes sense on an intellectual level, but it's not necessarily how we feel and making ourselves, like, feel. okay about it is can be really difficult so yeah very big hug and i hope you're okay i'd like to finish

off with a random is it just me mainly because i mean it's not this is not for you because it doesn't apply to you but i would just like to hear from people who also can't cook okay because with because it made me think about before and actually genuinely i feel like this is something that that from time to it's not like a it's not like a prevailing like thought in my mind but it does get me down quite a bit because I find it so difficult. I find it one of the hardest things to do is to cook and I know how pathetic that sounds but it just is and I would like and I feel like on TikTok on Instagram like everyone's just whipping stuff up no problem all the time and in my life as well people just whip stuff up and they're like oh but you just do this and this and this and I'm like

yeah but that sounds really difficult to me so I would just like to hear from anyone who finds it difficult as well because I feel like I'm just out on a little island of my own on my own and my little can't cook won't no not won't cook can't cook island so yeah should we send you to a cooking school but why even thought of that just makes me feel like oh my god I can't I couldn't even think about it

I just couldn't oh my god you did ask me how to boil the broad beans the other day but like I need I need someone I need that but I tried Gusto and I tried Hello Fresh but for me

I know how stupid I sound and I know this but like the recipes weren't detailed enough for me. It left a lot to common sense, which I don't have in the kitchen and arguably not in real life either. Go do a couple of hypotheticals here.

Like, okay, pre-heat the oven to 150 degrees Celsius. I can do that. Fine. That's a very clear instruction. Okay. Okay. But you say boil the broad beans, okay? So then I'm like, okay, so a few things. Like, do the broad beans go in when the water's like, boiling and bubbling.

It can tell something really helpful that you'll never forget. If it's grown above the ground, you put it in boiling water. Yeah. If it crumbs from below the ground, you put it in cold water and bring it to the boil. That's great, but how the fuck do I know what's been grown below above the ground? Well, Google it. But think about it.

Carrots below the ground. Potatoes, below the ground. Beans above the ground, because they come on little shoots. Oh, you mean like they have roots in the ground. Okay. Yes, obviously they have roots in the ground. Like, everything comes from a vegetable patch, but if it grows above the soil, then you put it in a saucepan

and pour boiling water onto it or get a boiling pan and then put the veg in. And if it's a potato or a sweet potato or a carrot or like any root veg, like a swede or whatever, I don't know if you boil sweet. I'd never cook sweet. Anyway, I'd probably bake it. But then anything like that,

you'd put in cold, like if you're making carrots, put them in cold water and then bring it up. Yeah. Like put it, yeah. Okay. So that's a nice way to remember that. That is a nice way to remember. Okay, so then, okay, so you've got that. And then, like, how long, I want a specific time for how long you keep the raw beans in because, like, how long you keep the raw beans in, because they'll just taste them. So, like, peas are, practice with peas because they're frozen and when they start to float, you know, they're done. You see, taste them, but, like, taste them when? Taste them in a minute's time, taste them in ten minutes time, taste them in half an hour's time, you know? Like, do not taste them in half a minute's time.

you all just have mush, it'll be foul. Okay. Most veg, in my opinion, needs blanching. So it's like in and out, like dead quick. So if you're doing broccoli, like I hate overly soggy broccoli, you know, and it starts to go all yellow and everything. And I don't know if it's Alex, I don't know if it's because he's Irish. I don't know what it is, but Alex loves an overcooked vegetable and it's been a real

source of contention. But you have to, for me, just broccoli, and I, when I said with the broad beans in the I said two minutes and actually that wasn't fair because we did do a whole bag of broad beans we were feeding for like 15 people so that maybe wasn't fair but I generally I do between two and five minutes but you just kind of look at it and then when it's like kicking off boiling it's just probably done but the more you do it the more of a feel you'll get for it try it after two minutes and if it's still too crunchy for you then just leave it in yeah but set a little timer I mean I have to stress because I sound so stupid but like I like I can do broccoli in the oven I know how to do

that easy. In the oven? Yeah, I do broccoli in the oven. 20 minutes. Well, you need an air fry a bit of oil, done. Air fry, you can have those done in five minutes. Yes, I need to get my air fry out. And spinach in a pan. Love that. That's so easy because you can see when it's very, yeah, anyway. Anyway, I would just like to hear from people who also are like this. Your birthday's coming up. I'm going to book you in for cooking lessons. My mom, see, my mom used to work like all of her family like her brother and older sister and my auntie who died last week um they ran a pub together so when mom was like growing up she worked in the pub and they were always like her family are really good at cooking like the basics like great for a roast or like any

pub food so she really taught us how to do like the essentials so she we could we could send you a bit but she doesn't really use recipes she just uses like her mind and i've definitely inherited that like i think i never got the foundation like obviously mom had five of us and there was no time to teach us anything yeah so she was just like i mean she always she always cooked but it was just like whatever was easiest and i think i never got the foundation oh my god put my mum on blast i'm so sorry mom also if anyone knows any good cooking schools that i can book alex into yeah but i need like simple beginner like start at the beginning all over london you'll be A kid's ones.

Oh my God, the absolute shame. I'm not going to a kid's one. Well, we'll see. It's a birthday present, but you can't turn it down. That would be rude. Okay, well, this has been lovely. Yes, we will see you guys on Monday. Thank you for joining us.

See you on Monday. Love you loads. Love you. And there's a lovely weekend. Bye. Bye now. Should I delete that is part of the ACAS creator network. Thank you.