Should I Delete That? - Is It Just Me: Depressing disgusting and confusing

Episode Date: December 8, 2022

In this week’s Is It Just Me? the girls discuss gym embarrassment, the pressure around having kids and dodgy cubicles...Follow us on Instagram @shouldideletethatEmail us at [e-mail] & edited by Daisy GrantMusic by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello. We should have a third microphone because we have Bua sitting in between us in the studio. It is actually a really cute shot, isn't it? I hope the video fixes us up. And she knows where her foods... She knows that Alex is fundamentally weak

because she just sits there and begs. Feeds her. You're not begging, but it was begging. Both of them just staring at you. Alex was like, love me but it was like feed me I am the worst betty is the bit I was saying this today this morning like we've raised the biggest diva like she's the biggest spoiled brat because I'm pathetic I have no boundaries I am pathetic individual who just like cannot hold

my own against a beautiful little creature who's like find my new base think of me oh why do you put you she just put my whole wrist in her mouth and then look really like why have I done this um okay I've got like a serious thing to kick us off if you're up for it Are you ready? Do you want it? Or do you want to go sit? Do you want to, lube us up, wead us in? I could lube us up with an embarrassing story. That's, I'd prefer that.

I'd prefer that. I enjoy those because I don't go the gym. So I'm intrigued as to what happens in gyms. Yeah, I'm also like happily reminded why I don't go. Embarrassing gym story. Hi, all. I would firstly like to say that I love the pod and all of you guys who make it happen. It's really helped give me the light relief I needed and what has turned out to be a pretty

difficult year. I find myself agreeing with literally everything you say and I often send segments to my mum and my boyfriend to show them that it's not just me that does, that thinks or does certain things. That's really sweet. Really sweet. But also, like, don't agree with everything. We say, no. The baby's not having these, plastic being invented in the 80s. We are not, not everything. Fact check. Everything. Yeah. But also really sweet. And that isn't that nice? Like, that is just like the whole aim of the podcast. Like, it's not just me that thinks or does these certain things. That is the entire aim of the podcast, isn't it? which is quite cool that it's working yeah yeah uh anyway today i'm coming to you with an embarrassing

story because i'm honestly mortified in capitals and this seemed to be the best place to share obviously it is i've recently started at a new gym and it's safe to say that my confidence is low especially around the weight section and i have a pretty rocky relationship with exercise in general luckily for me the new gym i'm in allows me to book two pt sessions a week today i plucked at the courage and decided to book them and have someone tell me what the hell all those scary machines are meant to be. I arrived early and saw my PT was with another client, so set up on the treadmill for a warm-up walk, all as well. Then, a few minutes later, my PT, I'll call him Carl,

comes up to me and says hi, then asks, what are we doing today then? I stopped the treadmill to talk, but forgot to consider that there is a one-minute cool-down period where the treadmill keeps going. Bear in mind that I was already nervous and flustered. When the treadmill kept going, I started to panic. At first, I tried to carry on walking as I explained what I wanted to get out. the session but this was hard as Carl was standing behind me so I had my back to him as I spoke

eventually my awkward brain decided that the best thing to do was just to stop walking and just sort of slide weirdly down the treadmill onto the floor this process took way longer than expected and so there was just a moment where me and Carl were locked in a weird weird eye contact him bemused and me in total panic as I slid and eventually fell off onto the floor the worst part is that I left my water bottle on the treadmill, so I had to watch as he stepped forward, press the stop button again, which is all I had to do to stop the cool down, apparently, and pick up my bottle for me. I felt so unreasonably embarrassed for the whole of the PT session after that,

and don't know if I will ever be able to face Carl again. Please send your love and prayers to me from a very awkward gym girl. I can make her feel so much better. When my friend, my friend started my school in sixth form, and we decided to go to the gym, and the only guy, the only people that went to the gym, at school were men and the boys not men that'd be weird like why have you got a gym

for the men at school anyway no like boys and it was literally her first week I think it was like Wednesday or something and we went to the gym she was she was on the treadmill she was running way too fast trying to show off in front of the men

boys and she obviously fell off the treadmill because she was going so fast it sped her like catapulted her into the bike behind her where there was someone sitting on the bike. And then she was so embarrassed that she put her hood over her head. And when she stood up, like, she couldn't see where she was going.

So she walked into like three more machines, big clatters. It was so bad, so bad. That is so bad. And I just think if she, I'll call her Amy, can survive that, you can survive this. You can face Carl again. She stayed at that school for two more years. You can do this. That gut, this entry that we.

had it just sounds so there's something about like an embarrassing moment when it's slow you know when something happens like when you fall or like something's quick and immediate it's like okay it's fucking embarrassing but like there's something about that slow burn awkward moment where you're just like yeah when you're the worst part of that story for me is that she's trying to talk to him over her shoulder i think that's like bad for the car he shouldn't have stood behind you like that's so annoying like oh i'd really like to just do the you like the no stand up Front. Really antisocial.

I do have to say, though, being a safety, Susan, I don't know how safe treadmills are. Because honestly, right, so I used to do Barry's boot camp, but have you ever done Barrys? All the time, I loved it. I don't anymore, but I did love it.

But, like, the speed that you're going at, and the train has just come and turn your machines up, and you're all, like, gridlocked, like, next to each other. Anything was to happen? They're the assault treadmills as well. That's, like, the more you run. Those terrify me.

Like, the more you run, the more momentum you get, because you're like, I'm half a step away from falling onto my face. Yeah. Like, and I'll go down like a banana because they've got a bit of an angle in them. And dominoes, because you're so tightly packed in there. Yeah, I get really panicked about it. I get those treadmill. Normal treadmill's fine.

Yeah. Like, you stick to what you know, but those ones horrifying. When you're sprinting like that. I just think, why would you sprint on the treadmill? Why would you ever sprint? Like, if the hat motto, unless you're being chased by a bear, it really doesn't matter how fast you're running. No.

No. It's miserable. It's horrible. I had to do, when I was doing my ultramarathon training, I had to do interval, like sprint intervals. And the first time I did, I've never done them before. And I had a running coach. And the first time I did them,

I got back and was physically sick for like three hours. Seriously? And then lay, because it was during COVID. So I was at my mom's and then had to lie on the sofa where the hot water was like, I was really unwell. I was so cold. I had drunk like five cups of tea and I couldn't take my hat off because I was so cold.

And I was just sick. You're actually physically vomiting. Physically vomiting. Because I was like, I've just never been so out of breath. I bruised my esophagus. It was horrible. It was horrible. I don't really get why people do it.

And as I'm sprinting, I'm panicking because I'm like, why am I sprinting? It's like the fight or flight the adrents in your head. And I'm like running and I'm just like, what's coming? There's nothing there. But then why am I running this fast if I don't have to? Horrible. Horrible? No.

Yeah. Like jog for me. Yeah. I walk for me. That's sitting on my ass for me, really. I'd love to go to a ride. and I was in high pocket the weekend to looking at everyone to spin, like, so happy for you.

So happy for you. I'm missing it so much. Oh, yeah. And I think I'd be all right, apart from the fact that, like, my tummy's quite heavy now, but my boobs, really? So big, and I don't know how big. And my back's bigger, so none of my sports bras fit. I don't want to go buy another one.

I just don't know. Just buy a new one, buy a sports bar. But I don't even know what size it would be, and then it'll probably only fit for about five minutes, because then, you know, my milk's not going to come in yet, but that'll be any day. and then I'll just be like yeah that's a good point then they'll be huge

and it'd be too painful to run then you can't run off the baby's born can you not just get one that doesn't necessarily have a cup in it no I need I need like the sweaty betty ultra run or the shock absorber ultimate run I think it's called

and the only two that work for me because they're like gravity defying really yeah I might try and get into one later and see but I was a 32E before and that's just out to the window it seems a shame if you're like you're really craving running. I'd love to go for a run.

Really? I'd love to. I was like all these little runners that I was just, I was so happy for you. I can't relate, but it makes me really want you to have a run. It makes me want to have a run to say it. But then I just, I kept saying it's like, she'll be out soon and then like six weeks or 12 weeks depending.

And then I'll be running. So I'm like, the countdown's on now. Yeah, it is on. For my first run. Okay. Like so next summer I'm going to be like, on it. Let's go.

I'll be running everywhere. That's exciting. And it won't be good. I'll probably have to start couch to 5K again because they've been like a year since I ran. But who cares? Who cares? It'll be slow.

Oh yeah, I forgot about that up. But everyone used that up with lockdown, didn't they? I forgot about that. Yeah. I'm going to start again. The hags is going to be like my mecca, I reckon when this kid's born. We're going to be there.

Yeah. Nice. Yeah. It's going to be huge. Anyway, I have a serious thing for us. I actually think it might be, I think it's baby related. Okay. Hi, gals.

All of you in Cat Plotts. So I think that means she knew Buer would be here today. Love the. pod of is it just me that is really struggling with what I want my family life to look like. From a young age, I knew I wanted children, but over the last few years, as my relationship has gone through some rocky patches, I found myself questioning what I actually want. I'm 30 years old, so I know I don't have all the time in the world, which worries me is I would love to be a mum, but I know I'm not ready at the moment. My partner of six years moved in last year

made various comments before we moved in together about how we'd get the house, get me pregnant, and then it would all be good. His mom also referred to the box room as the baby, room. There is no baby being considered in cat blocks. I have spoken to my partner since moving in about how I don't know what I want from my life, how I'm not sure if I want children, and if I do, I might not be via a traditional route. I have considered adoption, but I know there is a lengthy process with many hoops to jump through. My partner once commented that he couldn't consider an adopted child as his, which broke my heart. I get extremely upset thinking about what the future looks like for me, as it seems like so many people have their shit together regarding

relationships, family life, etc. And I'm just bobbing around not really knowing what I want and how I'm going to get there if and when I work it out. So is it just me? I would like to say a big thank you to Alex for sharing her egg freezing journey in the past week.

I have seen another influencer talk about it and it's so reassuring to see this being spoken about. Love you all. We love you too. That email could have been written by me with like a few details changed. And that feeling of like thinking that everyone else around you knows exactly what they want

and they've got this clear path and direction and they're on it and they know what they're doing and they're very strong in that like that is such a horrible feeling it's just like you feel so I don't know like I've felt this for a really long time and obviously everything has been sped up by the fact that I have been told that I don't really really

have long to get going and I think and I'm saying this as someone who is literally working it out like day by day myself I think for me it's been about like letting go of control a little bit and just being like things can happen and I can I can go along with them and then my life can change like rather than worrying about my life changing I can I can I can just be more fluid with everything can just accept your life changes yeah and I don't know it's it's just it's so hard because I'm the same as this girl like I've never had a clear idea of I've never had a I know I know I want to have children like a definitely 100% I would if I knew that I was going to end up having two kids I

would be over the moon but every year that goes by I don't feel necessarily any closer to it closer yes but I don't necessarily feel like oh my god now's the time I've got this really strong maternal urge. I've never had that. I've never been super maternal, apart from with dogs. But so I totally get where she's coming from. But I don't think that it's as clear cut as I'm like this and everyone else has a shit together and it's completely convinced that like, can I just say as someone who is literally two months less away from having a baby? Yeah. I have never had more doubt about anything in my life, which is a terrible time to cover it but the last few days I've just been like and it's a lot of external factors I felt you know

when I actually sit with myself I'm like I think if you just left me to me yeah left me and Alex and booer and locked us in the house there would be no doubt that this was the best thing in the whole wide world yeah but there's so many external things there's so many people talking about the pros and cons of having children right a lot of people talking about the fucking cons of it actually which I'm finding a bit much um and how it can ruin your life right right all of this stuff and and everything's going to change forever and all the just you waiters and all of the people in my DMs I'm just like this is too much I'm terrified about my career about my identity as a person about my relationship with Alex like I there's so much of this and I'm just like shit yeah shit

what am I doing but I'm here now so yeah we're good yeah and like it's gonna be fine but I just don't want anybody to sit and look at me being like well she made that decision and it's because she was 100% sure and why aren't I 100% sure because I haven't sat here every day and been like I'm 100% sure that this is the right thing. I'm 100% sure that I'm so happy about it. Right. And that it's the best thing ever. And I feel so privileged and so lucky

and it's going to be so amazing. But I'm not sitting here thinking this is 100% like, I don't know. Like, I'm going to smash this because I don't know if I'm, I'm praying to shitting like the hell what I do. Yeah, you will. Yeah. I think possibly like this girl,

we're very I'm very like black or white like everything has to have a clear answer so it's like I'm ready or I'm not and if I'm somewhere in between then I'm just up the wall about it and that's nice to hear that there is more of a grey area but I don't know what your opinion on this is I was talking to Jen my sister about this other day

and saying that I think on social media there's been this emergence of honest parenting talk which is great and people need it and like for the parents that are really struggling I can't imagine how valuable that is yeah and obviously everyone is entitled to share their own opinion their own experiences and that's like brilliant but I wonder if because I feel like all I read about parenting is not

is bad stuff and I'm wondering like if you think as well that it's kind of gone not gone the other way but like I don't seem to be seeing much positivity I am actively looking at for positivity now. Have you found much? And Ricketts, great. Okay, great. She put up the other day for the first time just being like, I'm fucking exhausted.

But generally speaking, here's my great kid, here's my life, I'm back at work, everything's great. I love this kid. Vogue Williams, great. Great, great. I mean, she looks busy and exhausted, but fucking thriving. Lottie Draynan, is really struggling. but I think she is just so wonderful

with how she balances it and I'm just using these women because they've all had babies in the last like few months. Fliss even, Fliss Rosina Flistie Rosina on Instagram she had her baby literally a few weeks ago and I'm like blown away

by how positive her birth experience she sent me a text the day the baby's boy like can't wait for you to experience this I was like what? What? Everything I've ever heard is like this is fucking awful it's agony, it's the worst

and she was like it's magic I was like, oh my God, thank fuck for that. Like somebody telling me that it's not going to be awful. Yeah. So I know, like I take all the negative stuff that I see because everybody has, like you say, the right to it. It's super important that with, you know, things like postnatal depression that we don't sit and feel like shame because there is a lot. And I felt it, I felt a lot of confusion. I did a post about it a couple weeks ago about my sickness and how much worse that was than I ever could have bargained for.

and I had a bit of a shitty comment from this woman being like, you're an idiot for being so naive. Like, why did you think it was going to be easy growing a kid? I was like, well, because I didn't, they talk about morning sickness. They don't talk about fucking like, all day sickness. All day sickness every day that I'd be on medication for for seven months

on the street, on the bounce, but like, whatever. Anyway, so, yeah, like, I just, I'm taking the negative that I see. Like, I don't want to pretend it isn't happening, but I do want to be naive. I want to go into this thinking, I'm going to be fine. Of course you do. And I want to go into it.

thinking this is what a body was designed for. This is technically from an evolutionary standpoint. This is why I'm here. This is why Alex is here. This is why I chose him as a mate. We're just going to, from it from, if I take it all back and remove all the Instagram and the like hashtags and all that shit, I just have to look at like the our unit and be like, this is fine.

Nature's got us covered. Right. And there also, as we know, there is no point worrying about it because why would you worry about you just have no idea but also as we know as well a lot of the time anticipation and being scared of something it's just as bad if not worse the thing itself yeah i want to get going now once you're in it you're in it then you know it's not like you're worried and scared about something you're in it then you can you can the thing as well is about being scared and about being worried is you can't really come up with any solutions

because that's where this girl is now she's in there you know you're you making your decision to get going and then you have that horrible limbo period where it's like you've made your decision but then your body wasn't ready yeah now you're like on the treadmill the treadmill everybody is like terrifying treadmill yeah um and i'm on the treadmill and like and there's a lot of people who have got on the treadmill through various sticking with this metaphor through various methods at different times and with varying levels of confidence but the worst bit for me would be getting on it it's like the worst bit is going to the gym once you're there yeah Because you've made the decision that you're going to go

or you're not going to go. Right. It's all right. But like the bit before where you're like, oh, I should go. I know, it's horrible. I've got my leggings. I know, I know.

And I just, you know, I haven't been in ages. Yeah. It would be really good for my cardiovascular fitness. But I don't know. I could just sit here and then, yeah, and then you beat yourself up.

That bit's the worst bit. But then to like to stress to everyone, like we are saying as well, like obviously, and if you're a parent and reading the, about the more difficult side of parenting is good for you.

Great. Good for you. Oh, great. Yeah, I'm saying this not from a, I don't want anyone to be sharing, I want people to be praying. And I did it. I shared the day about how rough the sickness has been because I genuinely, I would have loved to have read that. But like, at three months, four months, whenever it was. Like, I literally could cry thinking about it because I had so much, I had such a feeling of guilt by how hard I was finding pregnancy because it was just like, this isn't what I thought. I thought it was going to be glowing and like a miracle. And I'd sit there every single second of every single day. It's like hopping my stomach being like, wow, a miracle. But I didn't. I was just like pissing myself and throwing up and just crying and feeling awful. And like, pissing myself from throwing up, I have distress. And it was just the guilt I felt. And I just wish I'd read that somewhere else at the time, just being like, it's actually normal to not regret it, but to really just be like, oh my God, can I do this? Can I do this? And so by making that post, I heard from a lot of women for whom it helps. So I know these posts are important. Yeah. On a mass scale, but then from a self-preservation standpoint, yeah, yeah, yeah. has to take responsibility for the content they're consuming right and I know for someone who's as someone who's got a baby coming in a matter of weeks it's probably not great for me to read that it's all terrible right in the same way that somebody who's trying to get a pregnant might not want to see people getting pregnant all the

time or people that don't want kids you know like this just we all have to take personal responsibility as to what we consume yeah um which is we were just talking about that before we started recording which is why like I'm losing a lot of followers at the moment and we were saying it's actually a good thing yeah it's a good thing yeah because it's people that don't want that don't want that in their lives and they for whatever reason it's triggering or it's uncomfortable or it's just not what interests them and I think that's a really cool thing that people can be like I'm removing myself like I know my balance I know my

trigger points and yeah it is good and I've like when I first started this I know it's different and not on the same scale but when I first started egg freezing I like watched so many TikTok videos on it and Instagram videos and then I had to like pull back and I was like to know what I'm not going to watch anything I'm not going to research unless I need research but like I am just going to go with this and go along with it because I mean I think a lot of the times as well the stories that like do well like perform well on TikTok and Instagram are the ones that don't go that well like the bad ones and stuff so I was just you can just you just you just have to like yeah I mean I'm saying this is someone who finds it

very difficult to like block out external noise but thousands of people have done it like thousands, a few thousand people I've done it before. Egg freezing. No, having a baby. Oh, yeah. Billions of people. A few thousand. Billions of people.

I was probably in hundreds of thousands for the egg freezing. I've done it before. Yeah. I always go back to, like, my mom. She had five of us under six years old. Like, if she can do that and she's still relatively sane. Yeah. Yeah.

Then it's, I mean, I don't, I don't think it's necessarily fun. But, you know, if she's not. I don't know. I'll go with one and then see how we go. But also to that original emailer, I think you said, you know, in passing that you'd spoken to your partner and that he'd said, you know, he said once that he could never consider an adopt a child's own and, you know, his mother-in-law's making comments. I think what you need to do and take this or leave it is actually have a really good and honest chat with yourself and with the people in your life about this. at the moment, like passing comments, I was the same and I'm the same now. Like, you can cling on to something and take one thing that was said one time and make a whole narrative surrounding that one comment in your head. And then that's what you think that person thinks. But you don't

know what that person thinks unless you actually sit there and ask. And, you know, that's a really good way for me and my Alex. That was how we worked out that we were ready to start trying for a family, was sitting and talking to each other because you can't guess what the other person thinking you can't make the decision for both of you so you have to have that conversation really openly and it might be sad and it might be exciting and it might be terrifying and it's probably going to be a combination of all of these things yeah but i'd say you have to have it because your brain's running a million miles an hour on its own right now so yeah oh my god's so true yeah and you're not alone i promise you're not alone shit no i've felt exactly like this

how are you meant to know how are you meant to know what to do and you know what i've I've wished for years that I would have this really strong maternal urge because I do think some people have it where they feel like that is, that really feels like their purpose and I'm not like a huge baby fan. Are you? No, they're weird. I just don't. I like when they can hold their heads up and do fun stuff.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I like it when they're a bit chaotic and they're off. Yes. It's when they're so fragile, I'm like, oh, my, my, my nephew's like 18 months now and he's talking and doing stuff. And it's such a good age because it's like, but babies, I just don't get him. people like do you want to cuddle and obviously I oblige but I don't I don't feel it you know I don't feel anything I'm not like I want this for me for me I do I get that I got that this last Christmas

for the first time holding my goddaughter when she was like how old she was she'd have been about six months and she came to stay for a few days that she was sturdy enough she reacts to stuff you know you put her in the air and she smiles and like yeah that's she's engaging she's heavy enough that you're not like you don't feel like super fragile she enjoys like bath time that's something and yeah and being with a baby for like I was she stayed for like five days on her own with her mom and a dad um yeah um yeah she's just over a little staycation um but like having that time with her was like okay okay yeah I get it like I feel very attached and connected and like I get it but when it's just like the tiny ones

and for like an hour as well because you're just like I don't know you what do you want why are you crying like like yeah you meet a baby and it's like and then you have to give it back to his mom and then you feel bad you're like well I've made this worse did you really want to give me that and then you feel bad because you're supposed to be helping the mom but you're just giving the kid back

and like they just yeah they look funny and they smell funny and it's a minefield it's a minefield yeah yeah I do like how many weeks away from being a mom they look funny they smell funny they're horrible they're just weird I'm more worried about than being like 10.

Like this kid, I'm going to have a forever. Forever. Forever. Oh my God. Like I just, like, I've given her a room in the house, obviously. You're going to be a mom. You don't have a daughter. I know.

That's wild. I know. We got a cot last week. Well, no, it was called like a bed, like a crib. Yeah. That's crazy. In my office and I keep walking past it and I'm like, ah, this is, and I don't even know her.

And she's just going to move in forever. Yeah. Like, you know, you don't. normally if you're getting a roommate you'd like meet them first like little chemistry test or but nope just got to hope that she's all right just hope that you get along chemistry tests you know what i mean though do you actually get on yeah like if you're casting like two leads in a play you do a chemistry read oh my god everything crossed for you hon i know well if she's a horror if she turns out good yeah me too do you remember we need to talk about kevin oh my god yeah that was bad yeah

Jesus We just solidified this girl's decision to like put on trying for babies from a little while I'm so sorry I'm so sorry we probably haven't helped with that If you can take one thing from this Hopefully it's that you I promise you are not alone

And I don't think it's as clear cut For everyone else as we think it is So yeah Oh my God I have something for you Al Oh something to change your life Oh my God Right we've had a DM to the Instagram

Saying I have just listened to the episode Where Alex went to a party dressed in leather leggings and a jumper because she doesn't understand the weather. Yeah. His sister's engagement party. In the app, she wanted to make an app. You've got to tell her to get on Microsoft weather

because it gives you everything. And if you go on Microsoft weather, it says, prepare for your day. Umbrella, dot, dot, dot, no need. Outdoors, fair. Clothing, very cold. Driving conditions, great. And then if you click on the clothing, very cold,

clothing, very cold, it specifies for you heavy coat recommended. Oh my God. Temperature, 8 degrees, 6 degrees and the humidity. Well this is simultaneously brilliant and also gutting because I really thought that I had I was onto something there

but also brilliant. Microsoft weather but you have to have a Microsoft phone for that? No, you just Google Microsoft Weather. Oh, maybe you can get an app. Probably. I have something else to read for you just while we're here. Okay, I'm downloading the app now. Hi, lovelies, loving the pod. Just had the most awkward experience.

I needed the loo, a number two, and decided to go to the next floor up where it's quieter. So there I was doing my thing when I heard someone outside. Now, these toilets are just individual cubicles that open to the corridor. In a workplace. What? What? What?

They just opened to the corridor? I don't know. Yeah, I'm assuming she's at work because she's at the next floor up. Because you get that in like a bar. Like I went to like a bar at the weekend. like at the wine place in Battersea what's it called

when in there anyway they have like those places that's weird some of the places we go have those like brew dog

the brew dog place that we went to that one time they have the individual ways that come out to a corridor but that kind of works in a bar

but not really in a workplace I would take that up with HR anyway I digress so there I was doing my thing when I heard

someone outside now these toilets are just individual cubicles that open out into the corridor someone was in that corridor

on the phone they wouldn't have known I was there, so I just sat silently and waited. And waited. The longer it went on, the more awkward it would have been to flush and leave. So I just had to sit there listening. She finished, but then made another call. I thought I'd be there forever. She went quieter. So I figured she'd moved away. I flushed, wash hands and flogged myself out down the stairs. I don't think she saw me, but I don't know. So embarrassing. How do you explain that you've been in the loo for two phone calls.

Like, there's nothing that you can say you've been doing. No, no, that's awkward. I just, well, I just went to the loo in here and the guy in front of me had done a poo. He had done a poo. But this has happened twice now, because when I went first thing, the guy in front of me had done a poo. And I know because the seat was still warm because I went to sit down on it. And it smelled.

But I didn't, you know, I didn't know if it was him or not. But the seat was warm. So I was like, oh, straight back up again, squatting it is, which is getting harder as I get heavier. Yeah, it doesn't matter. stills in it. Squatted, need's mast, squatted, peed, left,

the stinky bathroom, and there's another guy waiting outside. Oh, I think it's you. Obviously thinks it's me. I knew the guy before me had done a poo because he walked out with his head down. I was like, okay, that lack of eye contact tells me

I need to go in here with my... It's wrong with everyone this morning. Nose clothes. There's a lot of people pooping. I know, so many... It was a little one toilet. Bring your poo to work day. What's the time when everyone?

Have it before you come, like a normal person. your feet away. You know what? If it happens at lunchtime, fair enough. But like, first thing in the morning, don't you do that at home? The first poo? Yeah, I suppose so, but I don't know if you can really like help it, can you? This is literally probably the reason I smoked for as long as I did.

Coffee, cigarette, poo, out the door. Does smoking make you poo? It is an active laxative. Is it? It's fabulous, yeah. Because coffee does, right? Yeah, so the combination of the two, you are trotting off. Wow. I know. I was thinking that I keep having dreams that I'm smoking, which is

really bad. Do you wake up in a panic? Yeah, I wake up every day. I'm like, oh my God, I'm killing. I'm suffocating my daughter. Like, I'm the worst. And like, they're properly vivid dreams. And I talk myself round in my dream.

I'm like, it's just one. It's just one. It's just, like, in my dream, it's all good. In my dream, I'm pregnant and I know I shouldn't be doing it. But it's really bad. But then I was talking to my doctor the other day because I'm on my iron pills. And he was like, are you constipated? It's like, no, but thanks for asking.

But I could. I might have to up my dose. So we were talking about the constipation potential. And then he was talking about things that could ease my constipation. In my head, I was like, coffee and a cigarette. And then I was like, neither of which are appropriate anymore. I'm not going to mention that one. I'll just stick with the orange juice then, the lachalose, whatever it's called.

Oh, okay, well, there we go. As it stands, I'm doing all right. Good news, guys, Emma is not constipated. No piles. Yay! Yay! But I'm also not going to poo in here because, mind you should. Well, you should.

You might as well. Yeah, exactly. Add to the mound of shit. I know. I'm going to leave this is blocked. What a note to end on. Sorry, guys. That's so grim.

Bleak, it's bleak. This has been a lot, I reckon. I know. I know. Love you. Oh my God, I'm so sorry. Equal parts, depressing and disgusting, I think. So, on that note, I'm confusing. Yeah.

Very mixed conflicting messages. I think when he's going to leave this one feeling a little bit worse than they did before they got here. And that's what we do best. So with that in mind, we probably won't see you again. But if we do, it'll be on that. Sunday. Bye. Bye. Thank you so much for listening. Should I delete that is part of the ACAS Created Network.