Should I Delete That? - Is It Just Me: Golden shorts and sunburnt penguins

Episode Date: August 10, 2022

In this week’s Is It Just Me? the girls discuss whether straight boys and girls can be platonic mates, how playing "guess who?" is a terrible idea and Ben Shepherd in his little golden shorts...Follow us on Instagram @shouldideletethatEmail us at [e-mail] & edited by Daisy GrantMusic by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello, hello, hello, happy Thursday. Hello, hello, hello. Happy Thursday. Okay. That's not my echo. Oh, stop it. I have not one original thought today. I was going to say what you say.

Do you know what? Do you remember after one of your friends said to me, like, do you do that on purpose, copy everything, copy things that people say? And I was like, obviously horrified. My sister said to me yesterday, she was like, I don't think she's listened to that episode, so she didn't hear me talk about that. But she was just like, oh, do you know that sometimes you just like echo what people say? And I was like, oh, no, I know. So it's a thing now.

And now I notice it all the time. It's a complex. It's a complex. So. I noticed myself doing it this morning. My friend was saying something to me. And you know when you know you're not listening hard enough. Like, you know you should be paying more attention to what they're saying.

And I just wasn't and I knew it. And they were telling a story. And in the story, someone had said to them, oh, you know, I'm so sorry. And I just looked to her and I was like, oh, don't worry about it. And then I was like, that wasn't my time to come in. But I just wasn't giving it 100%. And I felt so bad. I was like, she was like, okay.

And then we just sort of brushed over it. but can't be the only one that does that. But you know, when you're really trying as well, I was like, no, I'm with you, I'm with you, I'm with you, I'm with you, I'm lost you. I'm gone, I'm gone, I'm gone, I'm gone. Do you know what, actually, I've got, and is it just me? Is it just me that asks questions, questions that they are very much interested in the answer to, but doesn't necessarily listen to the answers.

I know you do this. Do you? I know you do this, because sometimes you ask me stuff and I'm like, she doesn't care. She doesn't give a fuck. She's not going to listen to the answer. No, but the thing is, is that I'm interested in the answer, but for some reason, Before I know it, the answer's been and gone. And I'm like, and now I don't have the answer.

So I want to ask again, but I can't ask again because then I have to admit that I just didn't listen the first time. I've definitely, I think my family are quite good at communicating that. Like, I think I, for some reason, when I think of that scenario, I can picture, like my mum or my sister saying, oh God, sorry I wasn't listening, can you say that again? So I feel like that must be something that happens in my life a lot, but then the memories, like. I just, woof. It's so, like, it's so bad. I hate myself when I do that, because I do it all the time as well. I just, just don't quite listen. To be fair, yeah, my mum is exactly like that. And literally, when I'm telling her a story that's anything more complicated than like

five seconds long, I'm like, mum, mom, right, stay with me. Come on, come on, come on. So my friend's boyfriend, and she's like, okay, my, your friend's boyfriend. I'm like, yes, yes, you're with me, you're with me, you're still with me. Is there anything more embarrassing in this life than when you're telling the story and you know that the person you're telling it to has lost interest. Oh, that is more to find. That, oh, yeah. Makes me because you know you've got to finish it, but you're, oh, so like you'll be telling the story and then like a waiter will come.

And then everybody starts ordering. Yeah. And you're kind of like halfway through. So you kind of want to carry on, but you know you've lost the crowd. Do you know what? That actually happened to me the other day. And I was telling what I thought was a really. good story like genuinely a very funny story I don't know maybe I'll tell it one day

and maybe I'll listen yeah and then the waiter came like just before the punchline you know of the story and then when the waiter left I was like surely they can ask me like what happened and they didn't they just they just carried on with something else and I was like okay but you didn't even get to the gut bit I was all prepared and like lined up it's all teed up and it just you want to tell it now I never got to hit the ball no No, no, it's fine. I'm scarred. Oh my walk this morning, I was aware that I was halfway through a story and we would enter the coffee shop when I was still in the early throes of the conversation

and I was like, I can't carry on this story when I get in there because I'm going to have to stop and order it. Why do I think so much? God, you're right, it's so crushing though. Speaking of thinking too much, the girl who sent a message that we read out on Monday's episode about us she was basically like stop being embarrassed about like being a human like dissecting the very like the banalities of life um and she sent us a she she heard the episode and sent us a follow-up email um which was really sweet and now I feel a bit bad because I can't remember what we said but I think I was a bit like oh

whatever now I feel bad but anyway it was a sweet it was a sweet email no I think everybody feels bad now I think she feels bad I think we feel bad yeah she's like said, she said an email that she didn't realize, it was only when we read it out that she realized that it could have been interpreted aggressively, but obviously we interpreted it aggressively because we're terrible at taking criticism. Yeah, exactly. So obviously we took it personally because it's us. That's all jam. But I wasn't insulted by it at all. I actually thought it was really funny. Yeah, me too. And she, the blessed, she's really humanized herself in the email by talking about her own experiences with being embarrassed. And I just find the human

condition so amusing and exhausting and equal measure. Just like, fucking hell, we are. We are a lot. We are such a lot. Like, I just don't imagine other creatures, like, suffer like we do. We are such a lot, which is why we have so many, is it just me entries? Like, Buaer watches me as she takes a shit. Like, she does not break eye contact. And I, as a human adult, like, can't even acknowledge that I'm going for a poo where she, like, stares me down. I'm like, Imagine the confidence that takes. Yeah, because she's just like, well, you know, I'm just doing my normal thing. Like, if I didn't do this, I wouldn't be okay.

The reason that they stare at you while they poo is because that in the wild is at the time that they're most vulnerable. So they hold eye contact because they're trusting you to protect them whilst they're at their most vulnerable. And you're like, ew, pooing. You're gross. No, no, no, I'm kind of fascinated by it. I'm like, who's going to break this stare? I'm like I can literally see like poo coming out your bum but okay

like this is nice You know one of one of my like favorite moments is where you came you and Alex came to my flat You and Alex came to our flat And Betty I don't know Betty got so excited to see you She was just a bit hysterical All over the place

And she ran into the living room And you were in the hall But there was a door through to the living room So you could see her She ran into the living room Ran to the other end of the living room Turned around locked eyes with you,

squatted and just did a massive shit. All the time, no break of the eye contact. I was like, wow. Maybe it's you, Em, because she never does. Maybe it's you. Maybe it's a thing with you. Maybe they just, yeah, can't take my eyes off for you. They love me.

Oh my God. That's my superpower. Brilliant. Some people can read mine. Some people can fly. And then there's me who just, dogs like maintaining our eyes. contact with me whilst they shit. What a win. You can speak French and I can watch dogs

shitting. At least you have good hair, okay? Not today. I was actually going to heat this curle it tonight. But I thought I've seen you in the morning and I thought maybe you wouldn't want to see me if I... Let's just go the whole nine yards, honestly. We might as well at this point. Just rub it, literally rub it in my face. I will literally do that tomorrow if it looks good. So, is it just me? Oh, by the way, actually, for anyone who wants to submit their own, is it just me, please email the podcast, email, which is should I delete that pod at gmail.com. So, I've got one for us. Is it just me? Oh, straight in. No full play, straight in. Is it just me who feels really uncomfortable about their boyfriend having a female friend?

This isn't me being a crazy, jealous girlfriend because we're in a very loving and committed relationship. I trust my partner completely. So I guess this is why I am struggling to understand what it is that makes me feel so uncomfortable. Is it because we are programmed to see other women as a threat even when they aren't? Or perhaps it's just the principle of it? I have male friends, but I wouldn't text them all day, every day out of respect for my partner. Although now I have said that out loud, it sounds like I could be in the wrong for having my own personal morals and standards and expecting others to be the same. And now I'm thinking about it more. Why do I even feel like keeping a certain distance from other males is a moral standard I should uphold? Is that

in itself a problem. If anybody is going to help me make sense of this, it's you guys. Oh, that's troubling. That's very concerning. I mean, I love, I love your confidence in us, but please also get advice elsewhere. It's misplaced. Yeah, it's very misplaced and misguided. So, I have, and always had a lot of male friends. I have female friends too, obviously, and I love my female friends but I've always my two best friends are boys um and like were during school and they yeah I mean like I went track like actually when I first got together with Alex we'd only been together literally like 20 minutes I packed up and went traveling with my best friend Tom and we went literally spent every night together for like three months we went to he's from South Africa and we did this

amazing drive and we were together we camped together every night for like three months And actually at the time I didn't think anything of it Because I think if Alex had a problem with it I'd have been like Fuck off Like this is my friendship and you can't come and like claim me But now sometimes I think back And I'm like that was incredibly trusting of Alex

And I was like hey so I'm enjoying big in a relationship But right now I'm gonna go and get in a car with this guy For three months and I'll see you when I get back I'm literally going to sleep in a tent with him every single night And like love you Bye I don't think we'd even said I love you yet And I was like it's actually

so weird when I think back to it but I think like that's kind of the boy when I was first getting together with Alex it was the boys that like help me write the messages to him like so like they're a very big part of my life and I never kept my friendship with them separate from Alex like I always wanted him to be friends with them as well which he what is now and they were both ushers at our wedding yeah so like they've become his best friends as well so I come from a slightly weird place in that like I've been very lucky that my friends became our friends but I think I would have struggled if at the beginning of the or at any point in the relationship Alex had had a problem with me being friends with Tom or Charlie because it's a sign of a lack of trust

but there was something you said in email about how he was messaging her all day and all night yeah and that is kind of weird yeah that's kind of a alarm bells, isn't it? Yeah, because unless, I mean, even if I was texting anybody all the time, Alex would be like, what you're doing, whereas as it stands, it's normally you I'm texting all the time and I'm like, oh, we're just having a breakdown, no biggie. And, you know, like there's normally a reason in this day and age, you're not really, I don't know, but for me, I'm never really like having, you and I had a chat on WhatsApp last night for the first time in what felt like ages. Because I feel like normally WhatsApp's pretty messaging these days is pretty

means to an endy. And if you want to, communicate with somebody about, yeah, and if you want to talk to somebody about life, you kind of, you either deal with a crisis with them on the phone, or you call them or see them. So if they're kind of just like communicating all the time and they don't work together, then maybe that's a bit weird. I think that's a bit weird. If that's what, if we're reading that right, that she wouldn't text them all day every day out of respect. If that's what he's doing, I think that's weird. Yeah, because I can't think of anybody that I'd be texting all day every day. And like, I was thinking about like the communication that I have with those with my best friend my my boy best

friends I mean Charlie and I say memes normally it's love of hum memes to each other but I don't think Tom and I've texted an aide I mean that's just us but I mean but then I can't mind I don't know if Alex would have a problem with it I don't know and you know what interestingly his best friends are girls his best friend Katrina lives in Florida and he facetimes her all the time and I've never yeah question that because they're like in my mind they're just best friends. His other best friend, Gina, he texts her,

but with Katrina, he's on the phone to her all the time. This is like, oh God, it's so context-dependent, isn't it? And I wish we had more details. Has he been friends with her for a really long time? Is she from, like, school, from uni? Or just, like, he's just met her at work.

Is she going through a hard time? Oh, yeah. Yeah, do you know her? Do you know her? She, your friend too? Is he really texting her all day, every day? Do you know what? This is, I, I, I,

I feel like I'm not even best play because Dave doesn't really have many female friends He's got me He's got me He's got you He's got you I wish

Yeah And all my male friends are now gay Interesting So I don't have any close male friends That aren't gay So I don't think we've ever come across We've never had that obstacle In our relationship

Yeah I don't It is difficult I think you need to work out like how you feel about this person because there may there may be if it's one girl that he's been friends with forever like I sometimes felt weird about Alex talking to Katrina all the time not because I was jealous but just because I didn't know her because just the way that our lives were she she moved Alex grew up in Ireland so I hadn't really met her and only met her a couple

of times and then she actually moved to Florida and married a guy in Florida which was just crazy so I've literally I've met her like in real life probably five times which is crazy because we speak on FaceTime all the time. Oh, Alex speaks. She's in our house quite a lot because, like, we'll speak on FaceTime. And, you know, and at the beginning, I'm, I need to get to know her just because it's a big part of Alex's life that I'm not part of, if that makes sense. But it was never from a jealousy perspective.

It was more like, I just want to get to know her. Which I think is so normal. Yeah. And I think that's something that Alex thought about my guys. So maybe you need to get to know this girl. Yeah. And say, like, okay, this is what you, you're such a good friend of my partner. Like, let's all go out for dinner.

because Sarah as well my best mate is Alex's best mate too and we have a really weird friendship where like Sarah lived with us and just like part of our relationship for like two years and now it's like she still is like it's and that's really weird but like so maybe you just need to like create that you know find something common that you have in find sorry find something that you have in common with her like find the common ground spend some time together

but if she's kind of being like no and he doesn't want you near her then I would say that's weird. Yeah, that red flags. I get the impression from this, I don't know for sure, but I get the impression that she hasn't spoken to her partner about this, hasn't spoken to a boyfriend about this.

I feel like she hasn't broached it. And my feeling is that she probably should and that he would be understanding and he probably like, if he hadn't thought about it before, he might be like, oh, hang on, having taken a step back, I can totally understand

why that might be a little bit uncomfortable for you. And then he can hopefully give you the reassurance or like he can do things like put things in place to make sure that you're more comfortable with it like making sure you get to know her better so the girl said the girl feels weird calling her girl but she said I'm struggling to understand what it is that makes me feel so uncomfortable but I do think it's just normal like I do think that's normal as well we are pitted to like you exactly like you said in the entry we do we are talk to compete and all those stupid friends like films and I'm gonna literally I could say any name and it's

probably a shit rom-com from the early noughties. But like, and I don't know if this is a film, but it just sounds like it would be like, my best friend's girl, is that a film? I don't know. There were so many films about like, oh, when Harry met Sally, sorry, when Harry met Sally, fucking love that film.

But I hate the messaging that men and women can't be friends. And I think like that is, and actually, if we want to get all femininity and deep about this, let's go, it stems from the fact that men don't respect women enough that they would be friends with them. It stems from the fact that men would only see women as sexual objects or, yeah, like something that they can get something out of and they wouldn't respect them enough to be friends with them in a capacity where sex isn't involved. And I've always found that really frustrating because I've always had friends that are boys.

And again, you can get into the whole pick-me thing of girls at school who only were friends with the boys and she wasn't friends with the boys because she was kind of a bitch or whatever. And there is that as well, which is complicated. but I think like generally speaking, of course boys and girls can be great friends and the trope that we've grown up with is that women are jealous and I don't necessarily think that that's inherent but we are taught to be and so I don't think you're wrong for feeling like you're feeling and once you slip into a dynamic in your relationship that's the dynamic that you're in it's not your fault. I was lucky that that wasn't something that Alex and I slept in

but we could have done probably or, you know, these things happen and once you get a little seedling and then you sit with the seed and then you're a bit tired or you're a bit insecure about something, it's really easy. Every bit of insecurity

that you feel in your life you're just watering that seed and then before you know it, you've got a fucking apple tree in your stomach and you're like, ow, this is horrible. Yeah. See, I, Al's right.

I'd say, address it with your partner, try and get to know the girl and if that, and you'll know because your gut's right. If he's weird or she's weird, or she's weird you're no alarm bells

yeah yeah but massive love to you that was a really good point that was a really good point you made there actually that in media especially that male female friendships

are always romanticised like always always and it's so alive they always end up together yeah because I think like my best mate Tom I went travelling with and I say this with a lot of love

and also full confidence that he is never going to listen to a podcast episode not a modic like absolutely not never never ever ever ever ever ever and love you tom but like there's just no way and people question this my mum questioned it's ages and she's like oh you're sure are you sure you're sure like yeah like we're literally just best friends and we've always just be best friends always and so i've watched all those films with all the context of my real life experience with a friend

that I just would never ever ever sexualise and it's really annoying because of course those friendships exist yeah of course they do like Alex and Sarah have the weirdest relationship Alex and Katrina have a brilliant actually me and Alex have more of the opposite friends probably than the other friends like he has more girlfriends and I have more boyfriends maybe or equal but then we share a lot of friends so there you go it happens it does happen it does happen they exist they exist platonic male female friendships exist so yeah to this girl don't panic, chill, talk to your boyfriend, and... If you've got bad vibes, trust those vibes.

Yes. And you're not crazy. I hate when, like, I hate when women make themselves feel like they're crazy for having these feelings, because you're not. There's a reason for feeling everything. Yeah, for sure. I heard someone say the day and I can't remember the quote, but it was good. It was like, keep your heart open and your ears to the ground.

I thought that was quite good. Nice for a magnet. Did I just make that up? I don't know. Write it down just in case. Anyway, I'm going to write this down. Yeah. Hit me. Have you got, have you got any? Okay, yeah.

A couple of layers to this. And I think the first last is going to make you feel good. Hi, I'm Alex. Alex. Alex. See, that's what we said on Monday's episode. There are some words that just weird. Alex. Your name, weird word. So is it M, actually. Very. Very. Just M. Why isn't it just M? Why has it got any stupid? Anyway. Hi, I'm Alex Daisy. It made me. That's so formal. Have you say, I love the pod. I listen to you girls on my drive to and from work.

I honestly feel like I'm in the car having a chat with my best mates. Thank you for being amazing. Oh. Thank you. Honestly, I'm feeling really, like, sorry for myself this week, so that's helps. Jumping straight in with Alex's cooking, is it just me? It is definitely not just you. I am not a fan of cooking, and I'm pretty bad to sit when I do try. I love food, going out to eat, trying new foods, but actually cooking a meal is just not fun for me.

Too many things to think about. Get one ingredient measurement wrong, and the whole meal tastes like shit. It's too much. My boyfriend actually enjoys cooking, so we have an agreement. He cooks, I wash the pots, works for us. Owl, honestly, I am 100% on Can't Cook Island with you. And then, because she's the best, she's given a lot of something for me at the end. M, this one's for you.

An embarrassing mistaken identity story. My favourite. I have two younger cousins and we all went to the same high school. The youngest one had joined that year. I was in the corridor during lunch break and saw my cousin, or so I thought. So I walked up behind her, put my hands over her eyes and said, guess who? Silence followed.

I quickly removed my hands and as she started to turn to face me I realized this girl was not my cousin could the ground swallow me up I quickly uttered oh sorry thought you were someone else and walked as fast as possible in the opposite direction needless to say I've never done a guess who again

hopes is maybe too with love as well that the physical element of that takes it to a whole other level the new gender didn't have it's just extremely violating isn't it, to put your hands on someone you do not know. It's so intimate. Especially to take away one of their senses, you know?

It's so true. You're like fully debilitating them. Not only are you like, yeah, you're encroaching their personal space, but you're fundamentally blinding them. And then making them do mind games. Like, how cruel are you? Oh, God, love you. I would die.

I would die. Not that. Something. I would. literally die. Some things we do make them more embarrassing than perhaps they need to be, but this is so fucking embarrassing.

God help you. I'm just beautifully mortifying. You know what? I think it's quite a good rule to have. You know, she just finished that thing off and just said like, I haven't done a guess who again. I'm like, fair. Like, it's actually, that's quite a good life rule to have.

I just, I don't think guess who's are a good thing. I've never enjoyed being guess whoed. And I think it's, you're right, is because of the loss of one of your senses you feel very vulnerable and I instantly get defensive and kind of angry so something that's supposed to be like nice and endearing I'm like get off and then I'm like touching your hands

I'm like who is it? Get off back off yeah exactly attacker stranger danger punch at the face yeah it's not for me I don't like to be surprised in that capacity no no I don't it's too much it's too much it's too sensory you know like please don't do that

also don't come up behind I'm me. I don't like that either. I don't like surprises. I don't like scares. I don't like shocks. You know? I'd like you to text me 30 minutes before I'm about to see you. So I know that it's coming rather than guess who, you know? Okay. Noted. So if you see me out and about, feel free to message and then 30 minutes later. I said to make your approach. Fuck off. Who's got the time? He's got the time. Also, Al, imagine you've received the message and then you've just got a 30 minute wait knowing that someone is staring at you

waiting to make their approach that would be horrific you're sitting in prayer you wouldn't trust anyone you're waiting you know someone in there is about to make their advance and you just don't know who it is two minutes I'd like back myself up

it's so extreme I'll be ready in half an hour and they'll be watching you for half an hour just doing fuck all Yeah, no, I take that back. Apart from being on edge that they're on the way over. Okay, I take it back. I was objectively wrong.

I'm just going to ambush you tomorrow. I'm going to guess you. You won't know where I'm coming from. I might come from the sky. I'll jump out of the first floor window. I'll land on your shoulders. I might do that thing, right? You know, when someone touches you, then they get electric shocked.

Okay, but you can't do that on purpose. No, and you get electric shock for touching them. It would be worth it to give you the comeuppance you deserve for shock, for frightening me. Have you got a taser? You can't plan a static electric shock. That's premeditated. That's sick. That's gross. That's, that's, that's, that's, that's violence. I don't, I don't, I don't, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Please don't report me. I'm sorry. Please never report me. It was an accident. It was like there, like rubbing, like rubbing, like rubbing a balloon against a head for ages. scuffing your feet along the floor you know

you can write so you get the message and in the 30 minutes following you're just there frantically rubbing your arms charging yourself up and they make their approach oh my god I touched an electric fence once when I was about 10 and I shit you not

I flew up into the air I went back about six foot oh is it bad because I always wonder if it is actually... Do they just say that to deter anyone from... Well, it depends. If you go to, like, high security prison, yeah, it's pretty bad. But, like, if you touch, like, chicken coop, for example... You know, my mum rescues are chickens, and so she has to put... Because the fox comes, so she has to put, like, an electric fence around that.

That's fine. Like, you can touch that, and it's like, oh, like, it's not... I mean, and I'm exactly one of those people you know about my lack of impulse control. There's something fundamentally wrong with me. time we see an electric fence. I'm like, I wonder, I've touched so many deliberately just to see what would happen, which I think is how the other one happened. Anyway, so the chicken one, fine, but then I touched one on a walk once, like a countryside walk. I think it must have been like a house, like a horse or a cow one, I don't know, like a, but like not chickens, like livestock, big, big animals. And I touch one of those and I, I swear to God, it was like,

boom, like it was like a bang. And I was like, ah. And then my horse, I, literally like Kate like I wasn't passed out but I was just so shocked that like one minute I was just standing by a fence and then the next minute I was on my ass and then I just had like a completely dead arm and I was so embarrassing I was like oh my god like what did that look like to everybody else like I was one minute I'm just like by a fence and then the next minute and I probably made it really stupid noise yeah she's gone um so yeah one of my mom's friends put a fork in the toast at the other day and I know I know I know I know I know I feel like, I feel like that's a pretty big, like that is the one thing as a kid that you learn as a real no.

Can I ask a question? This morning I was trying to get my bagel out the toaster and I thought, what happens if using my hands? Because, you know, I've got asbestos hands. I feel nothing probably due to the amount of electric shots. That actually makes a lot of sense. Just nerve damage. Anyway, I put my hands in the toaster to pick out my bagel because it got all stuck and sometimes it does. And I thought, oh my God, I wonder if my rings touch.

The toaster, am I a goner? Oh, actually very good point. Thank you. That's a really good point. Yeah. I'm going to have to Google that now. Because this is exactly the same thing as putting a knife in, right? Well, yeah.

It depends what rings you wear, because if you've got, like, I don't know, like, my wedding rings platinum, so I probably haven't got a platinum fork because that would be really excessive. I don't think Ikea sells those. But then, you know, like other metals, like that, you know, like, I don't know what metal is. silver, but forks aren't silver. Forks would be like, what's a fork? Aluminian? No, what's a fork? Steel?

Is it? What are you? Made of. Okay, a lot of people have Googled that that's made me feel better. Knives, forks and spoons. Yes, Al, are normally made from stainless steel. Okay, what happens if you put your hand in, in the toaster

with rings on. Yeah, that's, it's nothing, it just is all coming up about knives, which is all very well and good, but like... Right, we need a scientist. Do we have any STEM listeners? I mean, probably women in STEM have got better things to be doing

than listening to a couple of fucking morons. Do you know what, though? We do have very clever listeners. I feel like we might get a response on this, you know? Okay, what happens if you put a ring, like your hand in the toaster, that's with your ring on it? Yeah, can you let us know, please?

I'm taking my life in my hands every time I make a bagel because that might change everything. You know, I once put a tin of baked beans in the microwave. Oh, yeah, no bad. Yeah, I learned that the hard, it's so embarrassing. It's so embarrassing when you do these things. It happened in like slow motion. My phone was like, yeah, no. And then this like fire started in the microwave.

I was like, oh my God. Oh, shit. Yeah, what's. Honestly, it's a wonder that I survived that I'm okay. like when I actually think back to like all the things I've put in places that shouldn't have gone there like I told me about the time I put my hand

in the electric whisk nearly lost these three fingers it was really bad so wanted to see what would happen oh that was really bad that is bad it was really bad and I was like 14 that's what scares me about having children

I was 14 I was an adult I know you just don't want to meet my mum was on the phone to her friend when I did it and I was baking and she said she still brings it up now it's been like 15 years and she was like She's like, I was watching you, and I just thought, she won't.

But she was like, she could literally see the cogs in my head turning. Like, she's not going to do that. She's not going to do that. And then I was like, what? And then I just did it. She's going to go. I was like, I have to go. She's like, why did you do that?

I'm like, I don't know. I just have no impulse control at all. And when I get curious, I'm like, okay. So, I think I've, like, yeah, I think I'm growing out of it. I hope. I haven't been anything like that for a while. Fingers crossed. Because I can't be asked to post this by myself.

Well, we're lucky I can. I can cross my fingers, to be honest. I'm not going to have any fingers left at all. I did break these three on this hat and getting them at the end. Anyway, we won't go into it. We won't go into it. I just got no impulse control at all. Oh, well, I'm fine.

So I have another, I have another embarrassing story. Hit me. Okay, I have just listened to Monday's episode, which was brilliant. Of course, I have to say, I love the podcast. We love you too. And your puffing penguin discussion has reminded me of an utterly embarrassing experience on national TV, no less, that I thought you'd enjoy. We like to, like, up the stakes of embarrassment. So national TV is perfect. Thank you. When I was at uni and had lots of free time,

I went on ITV's tipping point. You didn't. I have so many questions. My brother and sister are obsessed with Ben Shepard. So during the round where you have to buzz in, there was a question which started, which black and white seabird? And I buzzed in and said, very common. confidently. Penguin. Ben Shepard looked at me with absolute dismay and finished the question with something like, can be found off the coast of Northern England and Scotland, mortifying. I live in fear that the episode will be repeated and every time puffins come up in a conversation, my mum says, or is it a penguin, Emma? Puffins are not my friend. You know what? That could be way worse.

See, because I don't know where puffins are found, I don't know where penguins are found, And I don't necessarily see the embarrassment in this just yet. See, because I'm fanatical about puffins, I admire and adore them. But, but when you think of a black and white seabird, you think of a penguin. Like, what's that joke? What's black and white and red all over? People say a sunburned penguin. Well, I would have said a seagull, I think.

No, they're grey and white. Although, on my day on the boat, when I see a sunburn penguin, I think. saw the puffins that I didn't see. And when I saw the puffins statues, I did learn about the blackback goal, which is like a seagull, but with a blackback, and they're horrible. Okay.

Because they eat the Gillymot eggs, and now Gilly Mots are endangered in the Isle of Man, and maybe it's the Gillermots. I think it's the Gillymots anyway, and the blackback gulls eat their eggs, and they're real pests, actually. They're real twats, actually. Oh, yeah, and they're black.

girls are grey and white but you could be another answer could have been the blackback goal yeah yeah yeah that would have been so rude Ben Shepard would be like shut the fuck up I can't believe you got to go on tippen I've never watched it I've got so many more questions about it okay do you know the concept right so you know when you go to like an arcade and it's like yeah an arcade and there's like there's the machine with all the pennies on the like shelf and then there's another shelves and the shelves move like this and then you go on tipping point and then you answer questions and if you get it right you drop like a ball or something i actually haven't really

watched it closely but i've been aware of it on and then it dropped like a ball or something and then i actually can't watch quiz shows and i tell you why it's because of the second-hand embarrassment of things like what's happened to our lovely listener i can't i can't bear it i like mastermind because i like people confidently knowing shit and that's it Like, I can't watch the chase or any of that because I'm just like, it's just so embarrassing if you get it wrong and I can't sit here and watch it. And also, when people take the minus offer, I can't watch it. I can't watch it. It makes me so angry. If I'm thinking of the right person, Ben Shepard is a very attractive man, right?

He's got white teeth. Is Ben Shepard a dish? Bradley Walsh is lovely. Ben Shepard's a very attractive man. Bradley Walsh isn't so attractive but he's very charismatic and I really like him Bradley Walsh. Does he host the chase? He hosts the chase

yeah, he's hilarious and he says gotta be in it all the time and so me and my brother and sister say got to be in it all the time on my mum got to be in it yeah Ben Shepard's I mean he's right oh my God have you seen that photo of him in the gold shorts

no but I'm looking now just having Ben Shepard gold shorts I want to ask the person with the puffin if this has taken the turn that you thought it would. Wow, yes, they are gold shorts. They are gold shorts. I don't think I've ever seen a man in shorts.

They're an odd length. They're an odd length. They should have been shorter. Oh. They should. Shorts have to be a certain length or else they're weird. I think men's shorts should be shorter. I think men's jean shorts.

Well, I actually, I've got really strong feelings about jean shorts on men. But I think if they're going to wear them, they should be shorter. When they go down to their knees, I'm like, what's happening? Yeah. What's it? Yeah, I know what you mean. They're just so long. Why are women's ones like right up the crack?

That's true, actually, isn't it? Yeah, it's 100% true. Do you know what I really want, actually? I want a pair of linen shorts that come down to like just above the knee. I just, I don't know. I've seen them like people. I would look horrific. I've seen the one Molly Campsy, who I don't know if you follow her on Instagram.

Yeah, I do. I love Molly's style. But I love Molly's style in the sense. that I could never wear Molly's style because I'd look so silly. Really? I don't think you were. I think you could. I think she'd wear shorts like that.

I couldn't wear shorts like that. I think everyone would think I was going through something. I think everyone would be like, you're okay? Imagine me in linen shorts that were down to the knee. I'll just imagine it. Close your eyes and picture it. I'm seeing it. I'm seeing it with like a body suit.

And I think it, then they're high-waisted. And I think it would be a really cool look actually. No. I think I, well, I'll tell you what I've learned about myself recently. I have a very short torso and do you know how I learn this? About 40,000 people have told me after I put that video of me trying those skins control pants on Instagram and the video went viral and he's been viewed like over a million times. And still, I put this up months ago and like literally in April and still every day I get at least 10 messages saying you have a really,

You just have a really short torso, or you should have sized up. And it literally makes me want to throw my phone out the window. For fuck, then. It's so, so, yeah, that's a new detail. That's probably why I'd look stupid in knee-length linen shorts. If you buy some, can I try yours on? And we'll give everyone a nice laugh. Yeah.

If I wore those shorts that Ben Shepard was wearing, I'd look so silly. I have to wear short shorts. I have to wear short shorts. And that's going to have to happen even when I'm old and people say that I'm mutton dressed as lamb. See, but I think, because I, right, so I've got a long torso and shorter legs, like, proportionally. Interesting. And I feel like that makes shorts weird. For those, I don't know, now I'm confused.

Now, that is too much for my mind to put together, never mind. Okay, let's find a pair of linen shorts and we'll both try them on and see who they look fucking stupid on. And I know what the answer will be, it'll be me. We might have a bit of time after our meeting tomorrow. We'll go and find some linen shorts and try them on. That has got Zara written all over it. They love it. It does, doesn't it?

Yeah, it does. They would love a little shot. We'll try this tomorrow, okay? We'll find Zara and we'll try linen shorts on. And I guarantee I'll look like a fucking weirdo. I'm excited. We'll document it. Thank you, dokey, guys.

Well, thank you so much for listening. Thank you so much for listening. And we are going to see you again on Monday. I don't know why I said that as if it was a question because we will see you on Monday It's been eight months of every single Monday See you all, yeah, see you tomorrow That photo of Ben Shepard in The Gold Talks

is going to be my new phone background It's going to have to take over from my wedding picture Amazing That's something we got out of today's episode Um, oaky dokey guys Have a lovely weekend Bye Thank you so much for listening

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