Should I Delete That? - Lucy Davis on making peace with her body and toxic media

Episode Date: February 20, 2023

This week on the podcast, Em and Alex talk to The Office star, Lucy Davis. Lucy shares her story from performing skits to her friends at school to facing scrutiny in the press due to her appearance. She details her experience with eating disorders and body dysmorphia, and how now, she has learnt to accept herself. Her wit and wisdom inspires the girls, so much so that they suggest she should become a life coach!In the GBA, Alex is joined by a not so special guest…Follow us on Instagram @shouldideletethatEmail us at [e-mail] & edited by Daisy GrantMusic by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When you're someone who maybe is verified, you know this on Instagram or something, I think people look to you as if either as if you have all the answers or as if you think you have all the answers. I don't. I'm just me doing me. You know, fucking up a lot of the time, trying to figure it out and trying very hard to be someone who's as genuine as I can be. for anyone else, but just for me. Hello and welcome back to Should I Delete That? Today, joining me, we have a not-so-special guest in the form of my husband, Dave.

What a build-up that was. Thank you so much. Hello, everybody. Sorry, were you expecting like a really lovely intro? Oh, I feel bad now. Well, at least some words of gratitude that I'm doing this for, you? No, I was, to be honest, I think I got away lightly. Trust me, he did.

I thought it was going to be called Should I Delete Him? We joke. If only I had the capabilities. How are you? Well, Alex or Al, as I call her, asked me not two minutes ago, are you in a good mood as we entered the podcast? So, I mean, that sets up everything, doesn't it, really? No, I just wanted to check that you were like, you know, on form and lively and good to go.

I'm on very good form, thank you, as I always am. Losey. But no, I'm very well, thank you. How are you? I'm good. Are you? Yeah. You sure?

I'm quite tired, which is really annoying because there's no, like, specific reason for me to be tired. But I'm just feeling, you know, those. days when you're weeks actually it's been weeks where I'm just and before everyone asked no I'm not pregnant um which is what all my family said oh it's because you're pregnant no I just feel I'm not pregnant but I just feel so tired you know when you're like you could just if I if you put me in a bed right now I'd be asleep in 20 seconds yes but that is well no generally you find it hard to fall asleep whereas I'm the complete opposite I could sleep on a clothes line literally but you have the ability to sleep for an ungodly amount of time.

Oh, you know how people say, oh, I, I don't need to use an alarm. I just wake up. I wouldn't wake up. Alex, generally on the morning, will put on at least minimum seven alarms. Oh, at least seven. But the problem you have is you separate them out too much. So you'll leave like, what, five to five to eight minutes between them? By that time, you're asleep again.

Whereas I put them on like every minute. No, to be fair, the first one always wakes me up. Yeah, no, the first one always wakes me up, but I just panic that I'm, it's not going to, and I panic that I'm going to sleep through. I'll always remember the time when I was doing an internship in Paris. I don't know. Here we go again, everyone.

Did you know she's lived in Paris? I just wanted to, like, reiterate for anyone who isn't quite aware. So cultured. Thank you. so continental um i over i was doing an internship i had to be there for nine um and i woke up and you know when you wake up and you're like oh god it's really light in the room why is it so light and why am i not waking up to my alarm and i looked at the clock and i literally like 11 o'clock which is really difficult to get like make an excuse for what can you say because it's okay to be like

I overslept. I'm 15 minutes late, but I'm three hours late. Like, I over slept. Like, that's, that's embarrassing. I think you just have to hold your hands up, don't you? Do you? Yeah. Um, I won't mention you snoring. I've got a sore throat. Well, actually, I just did. I've got a sore throat everybody. There we go. Honestly. I have, though, haven't I? I've got really pussy tonsils. Sorry. There we go. Um, but honestly, it was like it was a plane landing next to me. Seriously? Yeah, it was unbelievable. Really? Yeah, and it woke me up and I was like, I was stuffed and then I was awake.

What time was it? I think it was about half four in the morning. Was I on my back? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Arms behind your head. Oh my God, I can only apologise. I'm so sorry for waking you up. I don't normally snore, though.

No, but that was a good one. I made up for it. I'm sorry. Talking about snoring, God, this is boring. Let's listen to our domestic bliss. talk about snoring you are the word but I'm such a heavy sleeper

I just sleep through it but your mates or a lot of your mates are like they won't share a room with you when you go on stag shoes oh dear yeah but

you know it's a natural it's because I sleep on my back okay I think that's the only reason why good bad and awkward yeah so are you ready have you got your good bad and awkward

no I'm gonna be you're flying a bit on the seat of my pants here but I knew you were I've got my awkward I've said to him all week Yeah but I was hoping During the week

Something would come Yeah at least You know At the point of last night You knew nothing was going to come So you should have just had them Together last night What this says to me

Is that you've not put in enough effort And I'm annoyed But I'm going to follow your lead Okay So you can start please You're good I will start with my good So my real good

are that I met my niece yesterday. You did? Yeah. She's not got a name. She's a week old, over a week old, still no name, which is very unbranded for my family,

well, for Catherine, for my sister. Can't make a decision. To save her life. So she's not got a name yet. I think they're between like four, which is ridiculous. So they're having like a day of calling her one name each.

And at the end of the end of, the four days are going to decide. I didn't know that everybody. That is the most ridiculous. So ridiculous, honestly. It's just so on brand for Catherine. To be fair, I think it's what I would be like as well. You know what's going to happen, though, don't you?

Your mum will end up naming her. Naming her. So she's not got a name, but she's beautiful. She's the most beautiful, cute, as tiny little thing. She's gorgeous. And, yeah, I was very emotional and excited to meet her. And I met Baby Arlo this week as well. Well, last week, yeah?

Yeah, last week now. But Em's little baby. Em's little baby Arlo. Yes, the third host. She's so cute, so sweet. And yeah, Em seems to be doing really well. And yeah, it was just really, really nice to meet her. It was just really weird because obviously I've seen it, you know,

during the pregnancy, I've seen M so much. I've literally, like, watched her grow by the week. And then it's just crazy now that there's, like, a little baby there. It's mad. Yeah, I know that that's how babies... I've realised before this point that that's how babies work, but... Yeah, it's funny, isn't it? After nine months, they come out. It is amazing, though. It is amazing.

And, like, I was looking at my niece yesterday, and I was, like, looking at her hands. And she's got fingernails, like... Well, that's always a good sign. Catherine grew that in her body. so weird it's just crazy to me honestly not so crazy to you

no I the body's amazing though Dave well no the body is amazing yes but no I mean I'm very rational and boring so it doesn't it doesn't really amaze me I guess

how can that not amaze you though to grow a human being inside of your body no that's true okay I'll give you it to you it is amazing yeah yeah great chat um so they are my real goods um but an extra little good you know my love for pistachio god's say it's kind of a weird obsession yeah and i wouldn't say it's kind of it is a weird

obsession why i just love possessio yeah but it's the excitement that you get from watching oh i do oh from watching oh my god i love pasta i love you eating pistachio. I love watching anything to do with pistachio. I live and breathe the pistachio life. So I saw on TikTok, this girl had been to a restaurant in Lesser Square in London and she'd found this pistachio croissant. Right. And it looked insane on camera on her video. So I dragged Genevieve yesterday. I dragged Jen to go to this place and pick up a pistachio croissant. And we did. And it was disappointing.

No, no, no. It was unbelievable. You know that pistachio cream that I used to have? That sat in the fridge for nine months? Well, just because it was a huge pot. Yes, go on, yeah? Yeah, I didn't sit in the fridge for nine months. It was eaten, but it was a huge, I bought an enormous pot

because it was on offer, like this huge pot of pistachio cream. Actually, I think it was, no, it was pistachio nut butter, so it was different to what this was. It was filled with the most beautiful pistachio cream that, like, it was stuffed. It was stuffed with pistachio cream. It was stuffed, everybody. It was stuffed. Pistachio cream drizzled on top.

Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Yeah, but have it... Okay, it looks great. Blah, blah, blah. Does it taste good? This is the thing, and I'm going to upset a lot of people here.

I don't necessarily love a croissant. No, no, like the croissant itself. Like, the pastry, I don't know. It's not why I don't like pastry, but for me, Quassant is lacking, like it does need something inside. So it's not going to be a 10 out of 10 for me. In an ideal world, it would be, I don't know. It wouldn't be a quasson. It would just be pistach. I think the quasson has sugar in it, maybe, which I don't like. I don't think. Cossons don't really have sugar. I don't think. I think it's just butter. Yeah, maybe. I don't know. There's something that I, there's something that's off for me about a croissant pastry. But if it was like a cake filled with that or, yeah. Anyway. Anyway, you can tell I'm passionate about this, though. Passionate about pistachio.

Yeah, you should do pistachio reviews. That could be your thing, couldn't it? Oh, my God, and the hashtag could be, passionate about pistachio. Do you want to share where this place was with the... Oh, yeah, sorry, it was called Baria, baria. I mean, that's one of the worst things I've ever heard. It was called Baria, everyone. No, but it had a double A in it.

Ah, right, okay. That's why I said Baria. Because, you know, when you smell what sheep's do, they go bar. Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. Um, you're, what's your good? So, uh, I haven't actually met our new niece, uh, as of yet. Um, they only let me, uh, visit the, the children after about, you know, two months. Uh, no, um, I haven't visited my new news, but obviously that is fantastic and great news and I look forward to meeting her.

Um, my good was a very selfish good that I've recently become a member of a golf club. Oh my God. I don't know if I've talked about this on the podcast. I might have done. Uh, this is going to be very boring. for everyone, but a lifelong roller coaster with golf, but something I've always wanted is to be a member. When we lived in London, I wasn't able to because we were right in the centre of London, trying to be a member of golf club as impossible. And now I finally have my escape from Al that I could justify spending five to ten hours away from her on the weekend. Oh, get stuffed. But that is my good. I'm finally a member of a golf club as well.

as a number of brother-in-laws and friends. So that is great news. And I look forward to not seeing you all summer. Do you know what? I look forward to that too. Like, I love you going to golf as much as you love going to golf. Because I get to watch my shit programs and zone out and a bit of escapism for a while. And some peace.

You know, it's nice to be alone. Well, congratulations. Many thanks. Your new life milestone My new life Because On to our bads Yeah

Hit me What's your bad You're first You're all I follow you You're the professional here I am I am Mr amateur

No no No no this is You are following me And I'm saying to you What's your bad This listeners Is because He doesn't know his bad

Because he doesn't thought About it Because it hasn't prepared No I do know what I'm bad Is but again it's boring really It's Arsenal lost to Man City Oh my God! You did not bring that as you're bad! Well, nothing else as bad has happened in my world, but yeah, that's...

Oh my God, it doesn't have to be like a bad bad, it can just be like a mild, you know, like an inconvenience. No, but that's my awkward. I have actually got an awkward, which probably says everything. But yeah, no, my bad is Arsenal Lost in Man City. And our title charge, well, title race is slightly stumbling. But yeah, that was my bad. Apart from that, my life is rosy. I love how you just really hit those, like the stereotype there.

Yeah, joined a golf club, lost at football. Man comes on to podcast. Talks about golf football. But that's why I was just saying... You're talking about boobozy or awkward. Probably. But no, I was just saying that that's when you realise life's not that interesting, isn't it? You've just caught me on a bad week. Come on. I've had so many

interesting things happen. I just, you know, just caught me on a bad week. Great. The one week. The one week that we're, because you're taking your bad from last week or the week before. Guys, I'm disappointed. Sorry. My bad. My bad is that I feel like a third wheel in my own household. How did I know this was going to come up? It's been my bad before. It's probably going to be my bad again. You're obsessed with the dog And the dog's obsessed with you And it's just like one little happy family Yeah

And I feel like a weird outsider That's just like desperately Looking for love And like I said to you the other night Imagine if you treated me The same way you treat Betty Imagine how much I can take you out for walks if you want

Imagine how much better our marriage would be There you go I can't feel like I'm on a Jeremy Kyle show that's a throwback that is a throwback where's the security guards but she's one of my best friends oh that's quite sweet

and slightly weird but yeah she's now got my flip-flop in the bed which I probably need to go and rescue from her because otherwise I won't have one but yes no listen it's not a you know

I know it's not a slight on me it's our family but you are you are you are you know in your rightful place somewhere sort of down the pecking world and I feel it don't worry I feel that I sense that I feel that ranking so

yeah I'm just really happy for you both I feel like you've got to up your game if you want to get back up in the stakes like what do what what I want me to do I don't know well just so you know I'm glad I've raised it

I didn't have to do it in a public forum but I did but I've raised it now so there you go you know how I feel I didn't need to do me a favour. What? You've raised it on, I was going to call it LinkedIn then, Instagram before, have you not? On to our awkwards. On to our awkwards.

You go first on this one. Okay. So we went to a screening, screining of Eugene Levy's new series. Doctu-series? Doctu-series. Travel series. Travel docu-series. Called the reluctant traveller.

And we went to a screening of it. It was actually quite fancy the screening, wasn't it? We didn't quite realise, and we turned up late, and yeah, it was... I'm not dressed for the occasion. I'm definitely not dressed for the occasion. Yeah, we turned up late, flustered, and yeah, it was quite a fancy screening. And the man himself was there, Eugene Levy, Levy, Levy, being interviewed by Alan Carr. Very cool, very exciting.

But we were at the back. We were in the penultimate row. and we watched two episodes of the series and sitting behind us was the man himself Eugene Levy this made me incredibly uncomfortable because I was like, what if he doesn't get the reaction he wants like he's sitting here in front of an entire audience watching his baby

you know something that he's made put so much time into what if he you know he's expecting a reaction and what if we don't give it to him So I felt like I had to overcompensate for the reaction. So is that why you threw popcorn all over the cinema? Wait, I'm getting to that. But whenever there was something mildly funny, I was like, ha ha ha ha!

Sorry, that was probably to be hugely offensive in the microphone. I would slap my thigh. Like, I was clapping. It was something. Literally. Well, it was, was not. Like, I was literally like just trying to like give him the reaction. It was, and it was good.

It was nothing to do with the thing. I was just like, I felt bad for him being there. And I felt like it was my responsibility to give him like a good reaction because we were sitting right in front of him. It's a weird concept, isn't it? Because, well, I've never done anything like that. But to sit there and almost watching people react to your stuff. Oh my God, there is no way on earth.

It's like watching someone listening to the podcast. I die. I would absolutely, I couldn't do it. I just say, no, sorry, like, scream without me, and then I'll come in after. I just can't do it. No, it's terribly awkward. Should we talk about the popcorn? Go on then, I'll let you explain that.

So we decided to sit on the end of the row, and they were very kind. They gave us bottled water, some popcorn and a couple of chocolates or something like that. And everyone was sort of, you know, all glammed up, you know, very sort of respectful, edging past each other, and I'll clots over it. With a drinker bag and everything Just sort of basically not all the popcorn All over Literally

The cinema And I know And I just I turned Oh I was about two yards behind And I watched it happen And I was just thinking Here we go again I watched it happen as well

But it's just like nothing I could do to stop it It was like slow motion But it was in the walkway for everyone So everyone was crunching through it as a walk past And everyone saw me as well And it was just Yeah Highly embarrassing wasn't it?

But more embarrassing for you because you were sat on the very end, so it looked like you'd done it. And you kept saying really loudly, like, oh, look at what, look at your destruction, Al. Look at the mesh you've made, Al. I was like, Dave, chill out. Like, it's fine. You sound, doth protest too much. Doth protest. You're awkward, hit me.

So, as many of you know, my life sometimes resembles the Truman Show. as in it's recorded without my prior consent and put up on the interweb for many people to view and comment on this has been a story of our existence because I don't as everyone probably does or does not know I don't have social media apart from LinkedIn for work so I don't see it I don't know what goes up what doesn't go up

but I do often get told in the early days my group of friends used to lambast me for some of the stuff but it's now softened because they're sort of used to it and kind of accept it however I have a new group of friends so-called work colleagues and I was out with them last night as we had a couple of guys over from the Australian office so we were leaving today and we went out for a meal with them lovely night lovely night

and then a video appears, someone's showing a video, and there's lots of laughter, everyone finding it very funny. And it's of me dancing around with a teetail on my head. Now, someone has decided that they want to follow Alex, and they have decided that they need to show all my work colleagues the video of me dancing around with a video on my head and also share with everyone around work. So now everyone knows where they can get insight into my life without me knowing,

which is also a bit awkward given that I only started probably about six or seven weeks ago. There is just one glaring problem with all of the, with all, everything that you just said, is that you said filmed without my prior consent and put up without my consent. That video, Dave, it's the, Miley Cyrus Flowers one. You performed for me in that video. You've literally performed for the camera. You put the teetail on your head.

You danced around. What did you think I was going to do with it? No. I understand certain bits of content will go because you asked me to it and that's fine. It's hardly one for the wank bank, is it? Well, I don't know what type of listeners you have. Maybe it is. I do do a good drop lund in it.

So, you know, you're welcome. But yeah, it's always slightly unnerving. And it's also similar in public situations. when everyone comes up and go, oh, Dave, Disney will do it? And I go, how do you know who I am? Okay. Look, this is the time to be very open and honest. Okay.

It's just us. We're just amongst friends. You kind of love it. Not really. You kind of love it. You do kind of love it. Whenever someone comes up to you. Would you call me a man who seeks the limelight?

No, definitely not. Right. Okay. But when people come up to you, you do kind of love it. No, I don't know. It unnerves me. It unnerves me. So what's their reference point?

Hello, your day. What's their reference point? What do they, they immediately have an opinion on me, which I don't like. Oh. And then what's their opinion shaped on, some narrative that you're creating? Correct. That's false, by the way. Yeah, I make you look bad.

Don't worry. I make you look better than you are in real life. Don't worry about that. So, yeah, it's just, yeah, something that I'll probably never get used to. Well, there we go. I think that is my, that was the only one I had prepared. Well, not prepared. The only one I had.

As you said, caught me on a bad week. Well, there you go. And I don't think I'll be invited back next week. I'm going to persuade. Should I delete that goes downhill. Downloads drop. massive dropping downloads Miss Flea for the Borders

Dave wipes out their whole audience Sorry M Yeah she probably is listening So I am sorry to M this is my fault On to our guest for this week And our guest for this week is I'll let you say it Lucy Davis

A.k.a Dawn from the office One of my favourite shows of all time Yes Lucy Davis, who I literally love. I'm obsessed with her. We started following each other a while back on Instagram and just like casual DMing.

Like she's so kind. She's shared loads of my stuff. And she's the nicest person. Like she's the nicest woman. I love her. And I asked her to come on the podcast thinking, this is such a long shot. But, you know, I'm going to shoot my shot,

as we do on the podcast. You know, we shoot it far and wide. And, you know, with varying degrees of, success and she so kindly agreed to come on and it was I'm really excited for you to listen to the interview actually it was so brilliant originally we kind of wants to talk to her about what she has been through in you know through being in the public eye and how that's been being under a spotlight and with the media and you know she was famous at a time when the media was you know famously at its cruelest and most toxic um so that's

kind of what we wanted to talk to her about and we did talk to her about that but she's now got this very pragmatic and peaceful way of looking at what she's been through where she genuinely she genuinely seems to have made peace with it which is really cool um so i feel like we kind of went through in the interview like went through a journey like with her on it and came out in this really positive space like she's really great she should be a life coach i think we said it in the interview but like i want her as my life coach she's really brilliant full of wisdom um and And it was a very cool interview. And yeah, I can't wait for you all to listen to it.

And you too, Dave. You'll love it because you really like her, don't you? Yeah, no, she was fantastic in the office. Like, you know, her talents obviously on screen, unbelievably talented, that whole group were. But it is a fascinating, like I don't envy anyone, particularly of that, well, that's not that generation, even this generation,

but particularly someone who grew up, who sort of came into the spotlight, probably unknowingly in that time, how they're coming back to me hate the line hate anything although you think

I love it but I just wouldn't I don't think I'd cope well with it and I yeah I'm very very much looking forward

to listening yes without any further of due here is Lucy Davis thanks for having me everyone I promise I won't

get him back again no I think like you should do a poll and I think it would be resounding never again

okay all right we'll do a poll hurry back soon then yeah please um please come back we need some charisma back love you all bye bye hi lucy thank you so much for joining us today i'm so excited to have you on we've been following each other for a little a little while now and i was just like biding my time before i um asked asked you to come on for i pounced yeah i immediately said yes you did thank you that's really kind of you

I think for the first time in our podcast history, my brother will listen to an episode. We've been going for over a year and he's shown absolutely no interest. And I feel like now he'll be like, I knew he and I'd get on. How are you doing? Yeah, really good. Yeah. A little, little quite a bit going on at the moment. A little overwhelmed.

In fact, I was saying earlier that I was quite glad to do this podcast because now I've got an where no one can ask me to do anything. Yeah. You've got a bit of a crazy situation going on at home right now, haven't you? You've got two rescue dogs that's kind of just like landed in your lap. Yeah, yeah. So that's going to be interesting. Two rescue dogs that are living in a spare room and they have one.

I've got, luckily got two balconies. They have one of them. My dog has the other. I'm having to keep them separate because they don't know if the rescue dogs have parvo or anything like that at the moment. I'm trying to find them homes or fosters or rescuaries or rescue. I'm also moving house and I'm working and I'm going to San Francisco at the weekend to do improv festival. So, yeah, it's fun. It sounds it.

What show are you doing at the moment? So you live in L.A. now, right? Mm-hmm. I do. I've been here for about 20 years now. Have you? This is my 20th year and I'm like, it's like a different lifetime ago when I was in London. Wow.

It's like it wasn't this life. But yeah, 20 years. and I'm doing a show at the moment called Villains of Valley View. It's a Disney show and we're doing season two of it. And it's very lovely. It's 20 minutes down the road to do a series regular in Los Angeles where you live. Well, that's my first time in 20 years that I've done that because normally you travel or whatever.

And a lovely cast and crew, great comedy. I love it. So I'm very, very lucky to do that, I will say. This is a massive, like, question. but do you just like i can't i can't go straight on the way it's just yeah um just about moving to like i feel like i mean i would be shit at living in l-a like i'm such a londoner um and i feel like a lot of people would take a lot of um ownership of you like a lot of british people would feel very like you're one of us but there there are some british people who just thrive in

america and i just wonder like do you obviously you prefer it because you've chosen to be there but what is it that made you leave the UK? I think it wasn't much of a decision as I'm leaving the UK and I'm living here. It's more something that happened. I came over in 2003 because BBC America were now showing the office so they bought us over here for a week or something.

Then I was like, oh, and I got a manager. I was like, oh, I'll come out for a few weeks and do a pilot season. Then I went home and I did the Christmas specials of the office and Sean of the Dead. So that trip was cut short. And then in 2004, I thought, oh, I'll go out again and do pilot season. And then I got a pilot.

So it kind of like, and then I ended up marrying here, although we're divorced now, but to a Brit who lived here. So we just, and we were working. It's just more that happened. It was never a matter of preference. I lived in London for like 13 years or something, and I love London so much. I miss it greatly, actually. And when I get to go back, what I love about going back is that I get to stay. usually in the centre of town I used to live in barns all together I was like done with living there

so when I go back I get to go and stay in town and I really like that because I can just go and see plays or meet up friends or go to bars or whatever I just it's I love going there and I love going to a Greg's getting a past week I try to not make it sound as exciting as more exciting I can't see my family and friends. But, yeah. No, that is a big incentive for going to the UK for sure. For sure. But speaking of your career, we would love to dig into it a little bit if that's okay with you.

Yeah. So you had a few parts before the office, but it was that. It was the office that really kind of skyrocketed you into the limelight. And it was obviously the show was such a huge success and internationally as well. we want to know like how it was to suddenly find yourself as like a public figure and someone that like people recognize and yeah uh it was an interesting journey i think when i i mean i've had a period in my life way after the office where i had to reevaluate if i still wanted to be an actor and i can talk about that another time if you want but um prior to that i'd always wanted to act i don't know that i what i knew what i wanted from it i don't know that i knew why I did. I just know that, I mean, anyone who was at school with me would have told, be able to say, yeah, Lucy would want to be an actress. You know what I mean? I would always be organising the Christmas pantomime if we were doing it or, or whatever it was. I was

doing Amdram and I always liked, even when I was 14 or 15, I remember hanging out in McDonald's as you do on a Saturday morning with all the group of whoever. And I would be in McDonald's doing a skit. Like, I remember watching, do you ever remember that comedy sketch show called Naked Video? No, I don't think so.

No. And there was this amazing actress who did a skit, it was like a monologue, and I adopted it as my own, and I used to do it in auditions, and I used to do it in auditions for drama school,

but I was to sit in McDonald's with, like, kids from, friends from Charles Lee Wood and solid hole, and I think that they let me get away with it because everyone was so confused they were like, what's she doing? Everyone else was smoking or trying to like be cool and whatever. And I was like, hey, good morning everyone. Here's my skit. And I mean, how I didn't get like hit, hit. I don't know. And so I always wanted to do

that. And then when I worked before the office, I just liked doing the jobs. And then when the office came and it gradually was more of a gradual thing because not many people watch season one and then it kind of kept being watched on reruns and different things and then i started to be aware of oh that's that girl from the office and then i started to be aware of that's lucy davis as opposed to the girl from the office or dawn from the office and then and so i thought how great that would all be when that happened and for a minute it really was it was like oh that's cool like oh cool and then I came to realize not to maybe a couple years in that I just wasn't made for that I'm quite a private person and in terms of like I will talk you know I've talked about my

eating disorder I've talked about all different things I'm open about those things but in terms of like everyone looking at you and and thinking that you're being seen or watched when you're just in W.H. Smith. Do you know what I mean? I haven't enjoyed that. And so I had a couple of years of going, oh, this is fun and going to this event and that event and, you know, doing a red carpet or going to this award show. And it was all fun for about a year, year and a half. And then I went, I just, I don't know. And now I'm here. I've done the rounds in the early days, specifically because I'd had a manager that was like, you've got to go to this Elton John's Oscar viewing party, for example, or the Oscar Gifting Suite. Who wouldn't

really love to do those things? And I went to them, and this is nothing against Elton John's party or the Gifting Suite, but they just weren't for me. I felt distinctly uncomfortable. I would be much more comfortable if I knew tons of people there. Now it's just an evening out with your mates. But going, and I'm not a good networker, going, posing for a red carpet when everyone says you know turn around so you've got your back i'm always like no i don't know what i don't know what to do well who are you wearing when i first was asked that question i was like who um i didn't know what that meant and i it was the golden globes and i was wearing it out for it from pilot and i don't think we have a pilot now and i was literally there yeah and i was

literally there going can you can you look a bit of google and i was so unprepared for any of it and then i tried to get more prepared and this is nothing against anyone who likes those things. There's nothing wrong with anything. It just isn't how I enjoy myself. And I'm fairly social, but I'm quite an introvert really, and I like being on my own. It was a very brutal time, and I don't think it's got much better, and it's changed, but it was a very brutal time, like the British tabloid magazine era, like the of late 90s and early 2000s was probably the cruelest journalism that any country is seen at any point, like to women. Yeah, like I cannot comment on like, I don't know, like far east

journalism, I don't know. But it was just, it was so cruel. And I always imagine to be a woman in the limelight at that time must have just been very stressful. It was. but because we didn't have today to compare it to, and people go, wait, hang on, you're asking her what now? Like, who was it on, on, thank fuck it's Friday? Oh, the Chris Evans one. Victoria Beckham. Yeah, where he...

Jerry Halliwell. Yeah, like, I don't remember seeing that back then. I, when I saw it on yours stuff, I was horrified, but I was like, what would I have thought back then if I'd have watched it? because you're so used to it. Like when the Me Too movement happened, what I hadn't seen or understood or appreciated was the tiny things that we become so used to

that you forget they're a thing. So when someone's saying, well, you need, like I would have, I'm not going to say, it's not a famous person, but I don't want to put a friend in it. You know, this older guy would pat my bum when I was in like 21, 22, be like, oh, got a few pounds on there, haven't we?

A, you're touching my ass. And B, you're saying that. But back then, it just, I mean, I didn't like it. And I said so. I said, hey, let's not do that. And then I asked my boyfriend, can you ask him not to do that? And because it was his dad. So, and he was a very nice man.

By the way, very nice man. It couldn't have been kinder or more caring. And sometimes I think in this today's world, we can also forget that as horrific as things were, because the pendulum always has to swing that way before it finds its balance. And at the moment, we're over here with the pendulum. The balance of it is, I believe there has to be some room

for our lack of knowledge and awareness X amount of times ago, some room for it. in micro things like that like I know this guy would never have wouldn't have known it was inappropriate I didn't know it was inappropriate I just knew I didn't like it and I didn't know back then

that that was good enough that that was a good enough reason for something to not happen yeah we didn't have the language for it we didn't and we didn't have the if I'd have said yes but I don't like it that probably wouldn't have been enough for a lot of people back

back in those days probably myself included i'm not i was no guru do you know i mean it's just what we learn as we go along and the voices and these conversations i think are really important and sometimes going back a long way is important for many reasons and at the same time like when i if i'd have watched i was like if i'd have watched that victoria beckham how would i felt at the time i don't know how it would have felt i can't say because i didn't have experience i may well have thought, oh yeah, did she get it back in back all right? How does she do that? And I thought, how did she, how did she lose that weight then? Because I'd have been writing it down. Same. Yeah. I don't, I don't think I'd have thought it was anything outside of what is acceptable.

I don't think that would have even crossed my mind. Yes. We were just, you know, we are, we only know what we know. Right. 100%. Yeah. And if that's all we're seeing, how do we know any different. Yeah. Yeah. But thank God the narrative around that is changing. But yeah, I imagine I imagine being in the public eye at that time and just having so much scrutiny on you and probably scrutiny, well, definitely scrutiny on the way you look because that's what the media did and still does continue to focus on when it comes to women. That must have been very painful and like how old were you when you were, when the office became like super famous? I think. I think I was because I remember getting the pilot and it was we were closing down for Christmas

1999 I'm pretty sure okay and this is why I love I'm very into law of attraction and kind of live my life by it and I remember back at the time not knowing anything like that then they wanted me to sign a contract for was it three years and this was quite new in the UK because over here because seasons can be so long like 22 or 24 episodes but in the UK was six usually then I remember going sign a contract and they said and I remember thinking I really want to be like doing bigger things

and it wasn't because I thought this wasn't great I loved it but I didn't know what it would lead to and I wanted to go to America and I wanted to see what was out there and I wanted to do film and different things and of course I learned that this was the way in and sometimes we panic and think we've got to get there we've got to get there and we're so focused on getting there that we're not on what's happening right now and what's happening right

now if we just allow it and let it be is actually unfolding for us to be over there but we don't let things go and we try and push and force it do you know what I mean so yeah I was about 26 well I probably was 27 actually by then yeah yeah so still at a pretty vulnerable age you know Yeah, still at invulnerable age. Yeah, and now it doesn't seem like, I know it's not like I was 18. At 27, you know, you have all these things of where you should be and what you should be doing, and it's all so silly. But, yeah, so I was like, oh, my God, I can't sign that contract.

But, yeah, when I did the second season of the office, I was bigger in size than the first season. Oh, my God, I just, I remember. No one said anything on the office. No one said a word. But I just remember assuming that everyone saw it and everyone was talking about it behind my back. And, you know, because also I have a very disordered mind when it comes to my body and food. So I've accepted that I don't really have a right now to decide if I look slim or not, decide if I mind.

I don't really have that right to give myself. I just got to accept what I am and let that be, really. Speaking of your eating disorder, and you actually opened up about that in 2012, which, by the way, it was a really cool thing to do. And it is a cool thing to do anyway, but especially at that time, because there was still, I mean, people are speaking about it a lot more now. There's a lot of people that are speaking about their eating disorders, but at that time it was still very much tightly wrapped,

anything to do with weight and eating was very tightly wrapped in shame and a lot of stigma as well. So it was like a very brave, I hate that word, but like it was a brave thing to do at that time. And it will have helped a lot of people. But what made you decide to do it and to open up about it? Because for a very long time, I had a rough guess around 10 years, I had only had criticism about my weight and my body and how I looked.

I'm not saying there was no nice article, but it was either too fat or too thin. looks ill, looks drawn. A lot of the time I was ill and drawn. But, you know, eating disorders are a mental illness and anyone who thinks that's ridiculous and that's great because that means you don't go through it. So that's the good news.

I can understand for any addiction, but I think especially with eating addictions, it's that a body dysmorphia, if you don't have it, I can understand how completely ridiculous it probably looks. I can totally understand that. It's like just eat less, move more. I don't know, you know.

So at the time, I'd had yet another article, I think, from the Daily Mail about I was coming out of a CVS, which is like a boots back at home. And I was carrying a lot of shopping, and I was very slim at that time. And I don't even know if I was underweight or overweight. But, I mean, underweight or slim, I don't know. But anyway, another article coming out, poor Lucy and, you know, look at that. A lot of newspapers, especially in the mail, do this false sympathy or this false bigging up of you. So they big you up so much that it can only draw criticism.

Or they, poor Lucy, so on. And, you know, I was just trying to figure my stuff out. I was just trying to figure out. and I kept hiding and I didn't want to leave the house if I was less than 110 pounds and I can't remember now what that is in Stones, I'm sorry, I didn't want to leave the house if I was less than that and I was convinced that my whole life would be better if I was the right body or my whole happiness would be good if I was the right body

my whole self-worth would be validated if I was the right body I couldn't tell you where that came from. There's a whole mixture of shit that comes up in just life in general. I could for sure blame the press for a lot of how I felt during that time. But, you know, something that I would like personally to see more of today is people taking responsibility for their own stuff. You can be in, I read a book called Mansearch for Meaning by Victor Frankel, who was in a Nazi, concentration camp and he wrote a small powerful book. Obviously it's a hard read, but the one thing he says is they took everything from us. They took our money, our possessions, our hair, our clothes,

our dignity, but they could never take from us our ability to choose our own attitude in any given circumstance. And I thought, if he can say that, I think I can because I ain't there. So I thought, I thought about that for a long time and I still sometimes think about that today because it is very, very easy to fight for our right to stay a victim and it doesn't do us anything. Even if you now go and get a ton of people to agree with you, okay, you can be buoyed up for a bit on other people's agreement of your opinion. But you're still allowing and waiting for an external source to validate you and we have the ability to do it ourselves it doesn't mean we can't help others it doesn't mean we can't be helped but I'll tell you now if I have a problem and someone's hurt me

I am the kind of friend and that's what I want in a good friend is not to say oh well forget him you know oh you're worth 10 of him but I don't need all of those things I I like to find a solution very quickly and move on, then wallow, and I'm going to call it wallowing, in being a victim about something. And because without, so in terms of going back to, I could say the yes, the press were a cause of a lot of my happiness with my weight, and that wouldn't be untrue. But in doing more work on myself now, and as Eleanor Roosevelt said, no one can make you feel inferior unless you give them permission. And so I don't give that permission now, so you can say these things about me, and I'm not saying it will never puncture, and it will never have any effect, because that wouldn't be true, and I'm human, but I'm very quick at going, oh, wait, that was nothing to do with me.

It was nothing to do with me. And the more you understand your own power, the better you will be. and because we can blame a lot of people for a lot of things and we wouldn't be wrong either by the way I mean I went through hell with that press stuff it tortured me for a long time but to some degree that was also my permission and the more I got of it the more I went

what can I do and then I wrote that open letter to the sun I think it was or the mirror and I just said all right here it is this is me have at it have at it you could criticize it but at least you're going to be criticizing the right thing rather than making shit up and then choosing to criticize that because there's so much made up you know that so much stuff in the press is made up from pure nothing um so i was like well go at me then go at me i don't have anything else to give you anymore it's just here's the story who's a bit of it and tear into it.

I don't know. It's an amazing. No, it's an amazing thing that you did. And I think it's really interesting what you're saying about like the, it's very empowering. And I don't know what you went through and you went through it for such a long time. To a lesser extent, I've had my issues with particularly the male. and it's really not my self-esteem for a really long time and you're right

when you stop giving them the power it hurts less but learning that you don't have to give them the power and this applies on this scale but it applies to so many people in so many areas learning that you don't have to is so huge and it is so vital for everybody's happiness going forward but what you did to do that publicly like writing it as a

I feel like again 2012 it's getting better but it's not like it is now it's not like you know people doing this on Instagram or whatever and you've got your legions of your followers behind you and you do something like this on Instagram but to do it as you did it then is so brave in that you're being so vulnerable

with the people that have hurt you which is often the biggest sign of strength but I wanted to ask what you're Was it terrifying or was it freeing to do it? I think at that time, I just was exhausted. I was exhausted with, on other things as well, just like with trying to figure out what, how to think about myself, about my body,

about my who I am, who I was. The best gift that I've ever given myself, is allowed myself to go, and it doesn't happen overnight, it's a journey, but who am I? And letting myself be that person, even though there are people, I've got way less friends now than I used to have, because now I'm just me, I'm fully unapologetic about it, I work on things that I would like to be different about myself, it'll change, I'm open to the fact it'll change the whole time because the only constants is change. And but back then I feel like I was just almost like, you know what, you've taken the best

of me in many ways. I can't do a single thing right. That's what I see. It doesn't matter if I'm slim. I can't be a universally pleasing weight. I might try to be if it could, if it could, but I couldn't be. so I'm mentally struggling and mentally going under I mean my anorexia started probably on and off in my 20s when I realized that not eating was much easier than eating and stopping and so it was much easy to go I'll have a couple days without eating and then that got quite like it's like an aphrodisiac you know if this that's the word it's got quite powerful feeling it's quite an adrenaline rush and then where it was Just as my marriage broke up, when I couldn't stop eating and I was panicking

because I'd lost a lot of weight, so I was really happy because I'd just lost a lot of weight. And I was panicking now because it was going the other way. And I remember thinking, what if I just throw it up? Because I was so full, I felt sick. And that was the only intention of throwing up is like I felt so unwell that if I throw it up, it'll just, I'll feel better. And I did. But I got all these other things.

with it that I didn't expect, which was a feeling of being high, a feeling of euphoria, my genes felt looser. And I was like, okay, okay. And like any addiction, it will creep up for you because you set yourself, you set yourself lines, you won't cross, and then you cross that line. So now's another line, you won't cross. Like an alcoholic might say, well, I don't drink before noon, and then somebody they drink before noon, well, it's beer and wine, it's not, you know what I mean?

So you always have a line that you say you won't cross. And so I was in London at the time, so I thought, well, it's just be my London thing. It's fine. And then I was on the flight and I had all that and I went for all this shit for my flight and I was kind of eating it on the plane and then went into the bathroom to throw up when I came out just in case anyone had heard me, I would say to the flight attendants, ooh, got a bit of first stomach, oh God, I had to throw up there. In case anyone had heard me, I wanted to confirm that this was. And if I would go and buy, if I wanted to go and buy a shit ton of food tweet. I would either go to different stores so I didn't look like I was buying it in

one or I wrote this pilot with someone once and about our experiences in rehab and wrote a scene of me going into a store which is what I had done and having long conversations with the store owners a little Irish store here about why I was getting all of these things and I was going oh wait hang on because she's coming to stay she's going to want the ginger nuts yeah and And I would just make up a load of shit just because I was so embarrassed at the things I was going to buy. And, but yeah, so, and then when I started throwing up, it was, it was very good for me. It was very good. It was like, it wasn't just about eating and getting it out.

It was, it made me feel a piece. Yeah. It sounds so bizarre, doesn't it? Like, that's why anyone who doesn't have this, I talk. totally know and understand that you sound like someone else said to me, this is first world problems. I was like, probably right. We're probably right. But here we are. It's because we live in a world right now where everyone's trying to get everyone on their side. Like, we've got to think alike. Otherwise, you're bad, I'm good. And you can think it's a first world problem.

And you might be right. And I don't know. I have no interest in arguing on that to decide if it is or isn't. I have only interest in going, and now how do I figure this out? Because I don't want to live like this. Whatever it is or isn't, it's a very real problem. It's real for me in this moment. It's very real. Yeah. I always say like you draw this line and you go, okay, this is my life. This is what you know about it. So you're judging me on this bit, but all of this has happened that is making me take decisions today and making me have. reactions and responses today and it's totally up to me as to whether I go do I want to have this reaction in response it uh or do I not and and to figure that out but because of course people

are seeing the tiny bit of your life they're like what you throw up if you god that's this that's this the other it's like yep no longer fight it think it it's totally fine yeah yeah i i do I think that anyone who, I mean, it's a mental disorder and, you know, anorexia has the highest mortality rate of any other, of any psychiatric disorder. And I do think, like, it's so incredibly dismissive for people to say, especially to someone who has an eating disorder that it's just a first world problem, you know, if you, for anyone who's experienced it, they can't dismiss it as that. So I'm sorry that you've heard that.

Like, that's really unfair. Bless you. I heard it. That was the first I heard it was when I read it was when I read. wrote that letter and for about an hour I read some comments and then I went, you know what? No. No. And since then, I've never looked myself up. I don't, I read my Instagram post, my Twitter post. I don't go on to, so say at the moment I'm doing Villains of Valley View. I went to a screening. We were shown the first three episodes and then I've not seen a single

episode after that. I don't look at the Disney comments by people. I look at mine. It's how I do my life everyone you know have do what you want but i i do my job i slightly forget that's the bit i love i slightly forget that it airs and and then i get about the rest of my life and that's how it works for me love that i i i wanted to point out and i know that you know that i don't want to sit too much with the media and the press because i think it's actually it is cool and like m said it's super empowering what you said about like giving them the power and not giving them the power but when I was doing research

for this interview we found you know what we found particularly sinister was that you'd been very open about this eating disorder it had been printed everywhere it was you know it was reported widely and positively

and it was very common knowledge that you you know you suffered from an eating disorder but then those same publications and those same media outlets that printed you know all of that at the time are now printing things saying oh wow she's lost so much weight look at her and it feels it feels really sinister I can't remember what they said Alex and whether it was because I don't know that they went she's lost loads of weight so she looks great I think it was I think I really couldn't be wrong but I think it was a focus on being fit and I was like oh okay, I'm all right with the fit focus. Yeah. Because that wasn't like it was different.

And so I'll take that. I'm not there to engage in more. I'm not there to do articles now about my way. You see on my Insta post. I post the gym stuff because my brother trains me and I was really proud of what I could lift. I never thought that I could do these things. Like I was doing a 145 pound glute bridge thing. Amazing.

Yeah, and he said, women don't know how strong they are. It's his passion in his life. He said, women don't know what they can do because they've always been told they can't. And so he, so I was really proud of this. And so, but as you know, I've never showed a picture of me in my old jeans hung out to the side where I'm much smaller now and I've never gone. I've never said how much I weigh, how much I've lost. I've never focused on the weight loss. I, I have never, I will never. And a couple of times when people have put comments of like, how much weight have you lost? Sometimes I'll say, I don't talk about weight. I have no interest in weight. I don't know what I weigh. And if some people might comment on about,

oh, you look skinny, good for you, I ignore it. I just ignore it and I move on. And yeah, that's all I got. But, you know, when you're someone who maybe is verified, you know this on Instagram or something, I think people look to you as if either as if you have all the answers or as if you think you have all the answers. I don't.

I'm just me doing me, you know, fucking up a lot of the time, trying to figure it out and trying very hard to be someone who's as genuine as I can be, not for anyone else, but just for me. And because it matters to me and it changes how I go about my day. if I know that I'm as real as I can be. It doesn't mean you have to share everything with everyone, but I just have to not have a fake persona for Instagram that I'm not really. So, yeah, I don't even know if that's a question you'd ask me.

I go off on tangents. That's the most, like, I've never heard it explain like that that people think that you think you know everything or your wording just there I was like, oh my God, you've just explained Instagram and like online. Exactly. Or that they think, I must think I know

everything. Hey, I'm verified so I know everything. No, I just, someone just gave me a tick. It probably was my publicist years ago that got me a tip on Instagram. And so yeah, I just, I'm like, hey, I'm just figuring out like all you. You know, and I'm going to be

50 next month. I can't wait to be 50. I know we're not supposed to, like, I don't know. I'm trying to be age positive, but you look so good. Thank you. Thank you. I've got a filter on. Yeah, a bit filler. I had my filler the other day. Oh, fun. Oh, nice. Yeah. I had a bit of filler for my marionette lines.

Oh. Do you like it? Yeah. Do you like it? I, yeah. I told my husband this morning that after I'm done with like this, the baby, that I wanted to get Botox in here. And I was thinking, I was like, what do you think? And he was like, I don't know what they aren't. he was really funny you. She's like, oh. So Botox there, that could look, because my eyebrows are usually straight and low, but a little there is like that, yeah.

So people will often say, how can you say that it shouldn't matter how people look and blah, blah, blah, but then you go and have your eyebrows waxed or your hair coloured or whatever it is you do. And I'm like, it's not about that, it's about we get to do what we feel like doing. Like, some women wouldn't shave their armpits or their legs because they're like, no, I don't want to, and I'm not doing that for a guy. That's brilliant. I just happen to like mine shaved. That's how I like it. It ain't for a guy, it's how I like to be.

So I just think that we, everyone likes to make things so complicated. Do you not think? Like, there's all, oh, well, if you think that, now does this rule and this one, what about that rule? I don't know, man, you do you. jog on do you and figure out your life because I'm sure there's shit there by the sound of this conversation

so but for me I'm just getting on over here and doing the I think most of us are just trying to survive really well do you what I mean we're just trying to survive

and when we look at constant criticism of whoever whether it's us personally or someone else and it's constant criticism I think that it's a great way for others to deflect, and I have a great compassion for this, but others to deflect from themselves

what they're going through and how hard. Because life is hard since COVID. Life has been hard for people. There's a lot of, a lot worse things on the streets and there's a lot more homeless and there's a lot more just even just with these dogs. I can't get them into a shelter or a rescue for love nor money because everything is so overwhelmed. I think we're just all trying to survive the best we can totally i do i do hate the whole like people judging going back to like people judging people for like getting their hair done or like their eyebrows and whatever it's like oh my god women have been shamed for not doing that stuff for so long or like shamed into doing that stuff and now we're going to shame women for doing that stuff like come on

cut cut them a break like geez we're all just like doing what we're all just like doing what we're need to do to get by and um yeah i love my highlights i had them done today that's that's their stuff that's the great thing is the more more i understand the concept of what someone says about me in cruelty is actually probably nothing to do with me the more i understand that concept because when you listen to it you cling to it a bit because you want that to be true but you probably haven't thought okay so what does it actually mean and very often we say things to and about others that aren't kind, either because they're mirroring something in ourselves that we don't love in ourselves, or because we are just not happy. We're angry ourselves, and we lash out. And I can do

it for sure. I mean, if I'd have been on that bus on Friday night with my boyfriend when he saw a guy kicking the shit out of two dogs, I don't know what I'd have done. I think I'm a fairly placid person. and I don't raise my voice. I've never been violent, but I don't know that I could have been trusted in that moment, you know. No. No. I'd want to kill him.

Yeah, hold me back. Yeah. Yeah, I have to say. My mom's got quite a strict policy about people who abuse animals, and she's like, we just have to do the same to them. I'm like, oh, okay. We've got one of the rescued dogs, own. He had his nose cut off by someone when he was a puppy.

I know. And my mom's like, let me add him. I'm going to cut his nose off. I'm like, can't do that, but okay. And he's actually, he's driving now. I can't. I'll send you a photo afterwards. He's literally living his best life.

Oh my God. And his tail and his ears. It's awful. People are awful. But I can't stress this enough. He's had such a happy ending. Of course. Of course.

Not only is that horrific, but that won't be the first and only time that person has done that. Let's face it. No, until my mum gets at him in which case. You won't make that mistake again. Yeah. How do we arrange that meeting?

I'm keen. Yeah, yeah. Geez, hello. I'm glad he's had a nice life. Yeah. People suck. People just do so. And I think, I mean, just spin it back to the feminism stuff away from dogs.

I think people, and we've, Al and I've been talking about this a bit recently, people are very, it's like we're really going out of our ways to look for things to criticize women for. And I actually think, like, I mean, particularly in the UK, like, I mean, I, of it, your fame, obviously being with, um, the office. And then, I mean, I loved, this is like my own fan girl. Sean of the Dead is like one of my favorite films in the whole world. Thanks. But they're like, like, I've actually got so many, like, personal questions about what it was like to film that. But I digress.

But I think, you're kind of, they're kind of like blokey environments. It wasn't like the typical, girly, um. I guess like mean girls came out at that time and like that's, it wasn't the sort of chick flick stuff I guess that you starred in. A hundred percent. And I just want like that must have been quite frustrating that it's like you're being nitpicked

and having your body this and your actions and everything and it's just like the starkness for you being a woman in kind of a mat, bro-ish, bro-eer space. Yeah, and I think, I will say looking back and given that that was like 2000 and only 2000, because we weren't like we are now, I don't think I'd thought of it like that. I don't think I'd thought, all I knew is that, as usual,

I'm the one woman in the many men. Because, and I'm trying to think back on, I mean, obviously I did Pride and Prejudice, and that was multiple women in that. I'm trying to think back over things, but yeah, they were more, I guess, more male-orientated. but I don't recall having a thought about that at the time I don't recall thinking that

but yes as the woman you're definitely picked on for how you look much more that's what they're going to much more you know the others are considered the comedy and then the woman is like looks X Y and Z but I didn't have when did I really start noticing it but I mean typical of our British press it's not at first they're all for you at first and then we won the Golden Globes and then And that was wonderful because that was a victory for Britain in itself as well as us personally.

And that's how it was reported anyway. But it doesn't happen. It doesn't take long for it to suddenly. I think that's just, the press knows it themselves. I'm not even, at this point, I just have no interest in judging and criticizing. It doesn't do any good, it doesn't change it anyway. It just makes me mad and I don't want to feel like that. So, but yeah, I think the pattern is well known that you're unknown, you're built up,

and then you're brought down because there's no fun in ringing down someone that isn't already known. The fun is to make them huge. You know, I see that in the Harry and Megan thing. That's my feeling on that. It's like, I don't know who they are. I've absolutely no idea. Never met them. I do know that the treatment they've received should be reserved for really, really horrific people in the world

and not for these two. I don't understand that at all. But again, I do think it's another example of people needing to hate. They need to. And they lack a huge awareness of themselves in the fact that they need this. They need this.

It's like a rush almost to hate. And we really forget, God, it's a huge thing. We forget how much we don't separate the facts from the story. The facts are what with Harry and Megan? We don't know them. With me, with my eating disorder stories, when you read something or you've written something about me, what are the facts? The facts are, I've come out of CVS, holding shopping bags, looking thinner than you've usually looked. Other than that, the rest of it is a story that we have about it. And the biggest joy now

for me is that when I've hurt by something I get to go what are the facts and what's the story I have around it and what Baron Katie says but is it true and even if you go yeah but is it true is it really true

and when we read the press we never ask ourselves that ever mainly because we probably want it to be true because other people people's sort of misery is taking us maybe out of ours? I don't know. Plus that expression, they say never let the truth get in the way of a good story. Yeah. 100%. Yeah. At the risk of jumping around here, and I'm sorry for that,

but I just have to, speaking of things that we don't know if they're true or not, I read this and I just, I think from an, it had been quoted from an interview you'd given and I just wondered if it was true, because if it is, it's a little bit horrific, but that you turn down a role in the Cameron Diaz film in her shoes because you would have to play her fat, ugly sister. Is that true? No. So here's the story about that, that I find this, first of all, I find this fascinating that millions of years later, this is still a story. I will go in to interviews still today and be asked that. Sorry.

No, I don't mind you asking. I'm glad to actually say it on a video as opposed to someone who's recording it and writing their words. So I, when was it? I think this was like 2003 or four. I was asked by Curtis Hansen, is that the director, to fly forward. from London to New York, I auditioned with Cameron Diaz in a hotel room and fly home the next day. It was to play her sister in her shoes that Tony Collette ended up getting. Now,

and I hope no one, this is just my factual part of the story because I think Tony Collette is beautiful and wonderful. But I was told, I think either by my manager then or Cassie. and I don't know who, I can't remember. I was told it was to play Cameron Dears' fat, ugly sister. I did not turn that down. I went willingly to New York. I mean, hilarious that I was thought of as fat, because I wasn't. But, no, I went there.

Now, after all the Me Too movement, I'd have definitely said no to a hotel room, but this was totally legit, great, above board. Cameron Dears was as nice as you could possibly be friendly, helpful to me, both of them and then it didn't get the role. The end flew home. I've told people that story I don't know who I was in a cafe one day

someone overheard it either they misheard it or they've written their own version. I have no idea but I've ever since I've read that I turn it I'm like, why would I turn it down? I was, it was ages ago It would have been a great job for me. And even, despite all the fat ugly sister bits, it would have been, Dorn was meant to be hugely fat. Was she?

But they, yeah, and that's not why they cast me because they thought that I was fat, by the way, but just because after hundreds of auditions, this was just what worked for them. Gareth, McKenzie Crip, was meant to be a very different role that was written in terms of looks and how he, they envisaged him. So things do just change because Tony Collector's neither fat or ugly and all the rest of it. But no, I never. I wonder that they don't write it like that to just invite comments. If it's like you turned it down, I don't know. I just trust no one.

I trust nothing. No, no, I don't really. And it used to really vex me years ago because I would have hated anyone. And certainly in terms of my career, like the director, to have. thought that I had lied and said I'd, I'd been offered something that I wasn't. That actually does make sense, then, sorry, I've just been playing it in my head. If you think like a Daily Mail journalist, so you're the worst person in the world, if it's saying she's turned it down because she thinks she's too good to be the fat, ugly sister,

then it turns people against you, then it does make people comment bad things about you. That would probably be the psychology of it. Yeah. Nowadays, you maybe have a psychology of, I don't think it's appropriate that I'm considered fat at this weight like you know like back then it was that this weight now might have been considered Hollywood fat whatever but I know I definitely wasn't offended at the time

whether I should or shouldn't have been but I wasn't I was just really glad like to have gone straight into a flight to New York to sit in a hotel room my time she'd come back from her little walk and to sit in a hotel room So, yeah, I was just very flattered to have been invited straight to that level of audition. And then I didn't get it. And then I was bummed not to get it. But otherwise, there you go, you know.

But it didn't offend me. And because I certainly then thought Cameron Dears was so beautiful, I was like, well, of course I'm fat and ugly in comparison. That's the thing that I've changed now. That was where the work was needed. The work wasn't needed in other things. that externalised that the work was needed within me to know that you it doesn't matter that your physicality what comes from from who you are it for me is about it's about is what it's about

much more than anything else despite my bo-top well i'm actually really glad that we cleared that up then and that you like got it on the record on video i said it on the record in interviews before but that's not a fun story so nobody then prints that part of this interview. It's crazy because I've read a few articles. It's a good few articles with it in and it was just printed as truth, like very explicitly. No, no. If I'd have turned that down at that level of my career with that level of a job, then, well, I would have been stupid. I've never had a desire to be an actress, but I think I'd take that as well. Yeah, I mean, yeah. I'd be like, how do I become okay? Yeah.

I'll do whatever it takes. Whatever. I'll break my own nose. I, aye, aye. Well, look, Lucy, thank you so much for doing this. Honestly, it's really cool. I've so looked forward to talking to you both. I love what you do.

I love all your articles on Insta. And I just think you have such a lovely message. And you're very firm about what you say and think. you don't take any prisoners, but equally, you're not so aggressive that you can't hear you. Because I find that about, like, I'm, you know, animals are my big cause in life, my big thing. I'd love there to be a day where the animals get their voice, I'm not going to lie. We talk about everything else but them because they don't speak and vote. So, but I, when people talk about veganism, vegetarian,

I'm vegetarian, something else I'd like to clear up. I put a lot of, when I cook things, I try to make things that I like, like lasagnas, vegan. And so then I'll, because I think it's of, it might be of interest to someone, I'll post it. But I'm realizing that people thought, I'm vegan. I'm vegetarian and I try really hard to be vegan. And I am the majority of the time. Sometimes when I go out to eat, I have to choose between my veganism and my diabetes because I can't do the two. very long story before anyone

asked me for that there's a reason and I can't be bothered to say it right now and so I post those kind of things just to like hey if you like lasagna I think this tastes like real lasagna but there's no meat or dairy and there was another reason I was saying that

what was it? Well people are very critical if you do one thing a little bit good you have to do everything good a hundred percent 100%. But people are awful with the VEG. I'm mostly plant-based.

Yeah. And I will not use the VEG and Ticell anymore because all that happened is people just catch you out. They just try and catch you out. Yeah, they said to you were a vision. But yeah, but you actually, you've bought a pair of bug boots or you've got a leather jacket or you've got whatever. And it's just like, oh well, fuck it then.

Like what? Do you happen to just go to like 16 Big Macs because like... I know. Yeah. And meanwhile, they're sitting there, you know. But you have to remember, we all have our... things. We all have the things that we gravitate to the most. So there'll be people who get at me about environmental issues. I do my best in that area. But they'll say, well,

you shouldn't have that because that's a, like I have this, this water in here. And then I keep refilling it with stuff or then I'll put it in recycling. But that's some time that's not good enough. So, and I'm like, uh-huh, but you're also eating meat. And, but I'm not getting at you for that. Right. I'm just letting you do your thing. I do mine. And that's how we all get a ton of shit done in the world because if we all thought one thing and we all only cared about the environment, no one cared about anything else, then nothing else would have a voice for on their behalf. So it's the diversity is what's important. And their diversity is what people don't realize they're stamping out by trying to get you to think the same as me and you to think the same

is me and now I'm going to fight you if you don't and now I'm going to say educate yourself read that again do better all of this do better yeah do better it's so it's so but then when you do better then they go actually don't you remember three years ago you said this so actually I think you're a bit of a hypocrite really for what you're doing now 100% but the great because you totally but the great thing about all of that when you're someone who's verified on insta when you have more of it than others eventually well for me anyway I become very indifferent to it and and that's actually very helpful I go oh you know what never going to I know that if I put a post on about a sunset and a giraffe it's just lo lovely if I put something that I think is important for me

maybe because like I remember going to speak on the steps of Congress about at the city council about circus animals coming into California. And I get more hate comments and shit comments for those kind of things. And I find that fascinating. That you don't have to agree, you don't have to do it, you don't have to sign a petition, you don't have to donate, you don't have to care about it.

But you do, apparently, have to criticise it. And I'm like, where has that hurt you though? Where has that hurt you? Isn't it fascinating that when you put a post on that's about kindness to something or someone else, that will bring out more hate, not for a lot of other, not for everyone, but that will bring out those comments.

So there's that for their psychology. So that's when I care less about what those people say or think of me, because I'm like, hey, I just put a thing on about how I don't want elephants and circuses because they have meat hooks put in their hooves to get them to do something in their feet. And that's what I did. And apparently now it's not okay with you and now it's all anger and well, you shouldn't support petter, Peter, because they're, they're running or abuse it. No, they're not. But I'm like, that's where you're going to spend your energy today. Fighting the fact that I've

just tried to help an elephant. An elephant. Just trying to help an elephant. Yeah. And your energy today is that and that's your energy to deal with and not mine and I don't let it any longer spill into mine but I used to for sure I love your brain yeah so do I you should be a life coach yeah you really sure

oh my god will you be mine only if we both do it because I need to learn a million things a million things I think being open to change open to your opinions changing at all times

is the best thing we can do because we have an opinion and it can be really real for us in this moment and tomorrow I know it could be different and I no longer have to keep fighting for the one I had so that I don't lose any validation do you know I mean so yeah but I listen to a lot of Abraham Hicks I will say that because I once I found that and I I listen to other things and I read other things and I tend to take what works for me and leave all the rest behind if it doesn't but I listen to a lot of Abraham Hicks I find it very it changed my life that's for sure and I started to work a lot more and I started to become a lot more peaceful and content with who I am what others thought about me and that was all through that for sure thank you so much I love you guys yeah I love me too I wish so much yeah I was so excited for this to interview you. If I'm back in London at some point for more than a night,

yeah, let's do something. I'm inviting myself, I'm coming. Yes, definitely. Oh my God, yes. Let us know for sure. Should I delete that is part of the ACAS creator network.