Should I Delete That? - Model and amputee Sian Lord on resilience, forgiveness and recovery

Episode Date: June 24, 2024

In today’s episode, Em and Alex are joined by model, motivational speaker and content creator Sian Green-Lord. Sian and Em have paired up with ASICS for their latest campaign, 15 Minute Weight Loss, to remind people of the importance of exercise for their mental health. In 2013, Sian underwent a leg amputation after an accident on holiday. Sian shares how the accident affected her life, her body and her mental health. Sian found that exercise did wonders for her mind, and after feeling like an outsider and an imposter at the gym, she quickly focussed on how much her body was capable of doing. Sian went from hiding herself to proudly displaying her prosthetic leg. The girls even set you some homework at the start of this episode… Follow Sian on Instagram @sianlord_Follow us on Instagram @shouldideletethatEmail us at [e-mail] by Daisy GrantMusic by Alex Andrew Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome back to Should I Delete That? I'm Alex Light and I'm M. Clarkson and this is a bonus podcast episode this week which means you're getting us three times in your ears this week but for a very good reason. This episode is in partnership with A6 and they have a brand new campaign which M is a part of and she's a really cool video for them. Can you explain a little bit what the video is about. Well, hopefully you've seen it now if you follow me on Instagram already. And hopefully you picked your jaw up off the floor when you realised the point. I was so scared I was going to get in trouble for it. Like people just like preemptively canceling me. Um, but Assex

are doing this amazing campaign about how we need to shift the focus from exercise to take the weight off your mind. So we made these videos a few of us as part of this campaign, including Sean, who's our guest today. And we did. these like 15 minute weight loss videos but obviously the punchline being that we're taking the weight off our minds rather than our bodies and they did this because ASICs have found as part of their research surrounding this campaign that the search for quick weight loss is up or quick ways to lose weight is up by 552% this year which is insane that we've come here despite all the amazing work of body positivity and body confidence and self-love over the last

decade or so. Right. And the number of weight loss videos on social media has increased by 295%. And videos dedicated to exercise and weight loss are more than doubling with over 8 million videos on TikTok just this year. Wow. Which is very depressing. It is. So I love this like this, this shift on how we look at exercise because forever exercise has been seen that something that we do purely to change the way our body looks and to lose weight. And it's just a total thinking, like believing that is such a total disservice to ourselves and our mental health. 100%. It's like we're always a problem to be fixed.

Like we've got a problem area and we can use this very specific tool to fix this very specific problem. But I've said it once, I say it a million times you wouldn't want to live somewhere constantly under construction. Like if you moved into a house that had a million things wrong with it, you would be miserable. Like, oh, the roof's leaking and there's no floor and there's like this is a, like there's no lights in this room.

You wouldn't want to live there. It just wouldn't be tenable. And that's how you're treating your body all the time. Like, I'll only be happy. you when this bit's fixed and I fix this bit and I do this specific exercise to fix this. Nah, it's so toxic and it's so negative and that's why I'm so proud to be part of this campaign and that we're doing this episode with the amazing Shan Green Lord. She came to speak to us about her journey, the accident that resulted in her losing her leg

over 10 years ago now and her sort of journey back into self-love and body confidence and a really positive mindset and the kind of role that exercise has played within that. It's a beautiful episode. She's so lovely, Sean. She's just a best. Her story is just incredible. As part of this episode, we're going to ask you to do something, guys. You have some homework. If you can, if you want to, if you can. If you don't want you, don't worry. Also, please do it. No, rose if not. Kiss, kiss. The campaign, the A6 campaign is called the 50 minute weight loss. And we would love, if you have 15 minutes or if you can schedule it later in the day, or even schedule it tomorrow, whatever.

I know that we are all very busy and it's difficult. But if you can fit in, squeeze in 50 minutes to do something for yourself, to do some kind of, like just a walk. So I don't know about you, but like I always thought that if I had to go for any form of exercise, it didn't count unless I'd done an hour. Like I was always so hard on myself being like, well, it doesn't count unless you do 60 minutes, hard, like sweating, miserable, unless I leave like crawling and crying. But ASEC's research conducted with Dr. Brendan Stub.

from King's College, London, showed that just 15 minutes and nine seconds of physical activity is enough to start to experience the positive mental benefits. I can do that. It doesn't that sounds. I can do 15 minutes and nine seconds. Yeah. That is so doable. So much more achievable.

That's how I like it. Yeah. If you're listening to this right now and you've got the capability, up you get. Pop your headphones in. Yeah. And just get outside. And you don't have to listen to the whole episode outside. But maybe you could go on a little walk and just get 15 minutes in.

whilst you're listening to Sean talking and just see if it makes a difference to your mind because, I mean, we talk about at the end of the episode. Like, if I didn't walk, I would be somewhere in handcuffs by now probably. You go stir crazy when you don't walk. I go mad. Sometimes when we're in the studio for like too long a time, you're climbing the walls.

I'm like, oh God, M needs to, we need to take her out for a walk. It's like having a Labrador. Literally. Thank you so much again to A6 for sponsoring this episode and for coming up with this brilliant campaign. And without further ado, for Sean. Hello, Sean.

Hello. Hi. How are you? I'm good. Thank you. Thank you so much for coming. And talking just for a special episode, an extra episode, a bonus episode. So, yeah, we haven't done one of these.

More of those guys. You're welcome. So you and I saw each other a couple of weeks ago at the A6 shoot because we are both involved in this 15 minute weight loss, inverted commas campaign. But it was so nice to see you because I've met you before. at one of the light London shoots that's right yeah I forgot it was the one that you did together yeah I thought it was a different one oh because I think I've done I did one with just you before and then the second one I did there you go yeah that's a couple of models

very fast each other on shoot because what can you say just the industry isn't it hashtag model life yeah exactly that's your business thing I love this campaign and I'm really excited that we're doing this episode I'm particularly excited that we're getting to do it with you um because there's just i mean there's so much to it that just feels really like positive and warm and that's how i feel about you um that's really kind so i guess like it would be amazing for anyone who doesn't know you yeah if we could hear like a little bit about your story how you came to be online i guess but kind of like i don't know a little bit little bit about Sean, please. Just hear a bit about me. Okay, so I'm Sean. Nice to meet everyone. I am a model, motivational

speaker and content creator. I'm from the Midlands and I suppose my whole online presence started, I would say, maybe around 2014 because the previous year I had a leg amputation. So I was on holiday in New York with my best friend. And I remember we arrived quite late at night, So we decided we wasn't going to go out or anything that night. We just wanted to wake up fresh the next day and just enjoy the sites. So that's what we did. Our hotel wasn't that far away from like Times Square. So yeah, we walked around, took some photos.

It was really lovely morning. But before that, there was a problem with our hotel room. So the shower wasn't working. So there was like, what you can do, just go out, kill some time, come back about 12 o'clock. can change your rooms and then you can go out for the rest of the day fine so that's what we did um but we got to around near about 11 o'clock and we'd stopped to get a drink at that point we've been walking for quite some time and we were on a corner and she said shall we go this way and i was quite mindful of the time and i said do you know what if we stay in this area we won't go too far away from

the hotel so i said you know let's let's just carry and walking down this way there was a crowd of people and then there was just me and my friend Keisha and I remember we was drinking this drink obviously everything's sweeter in America it was gorgeous I was like this is incredible look to her and I remember her eye line wasn't on me it was more like in the road and I looked to see what she was actually looking at and when I explained this it all happened like I explained it so it's quite long but this is like seconds this happens very very quickly and I remember into what she was looking at and a cyclist came onto the pavement where we were walking because he was arguing with a taxi driver and the taxi driver mounted the curb hit the cyclist

and then hit me oh my god right then and there at the scene my leg was completely severed off oh no so yeah oh my god how horrific yeah it was um you know not what you think your holiday is ever gonna ever going to be like you never think things like that will happen to you no and that's the cruel part of life i would say you just hear these things and you you know oh that's that's devastating you can only understand it to a certain extent but when things like that happen to you it's like crap like this is yeah that's yeah horrific that's so traumatic yeah but yeah so i um you know i spent the next like six weeks in new york in the hospital i was lucky enough for my family and everyone to come over to me I have actually a family in New York, so as soon as it all happened, you know, my parents were contacted.

They came straight to the hospital, which was a blessing because my friend was on our own for like, I think my first surgery was like seven hours. So, yeah, it was, yeah, that's like tip of the iceberg of, yeah, the whole thing. Were you cognizant after the accident happened or did it, do you remember, you know, after being hit? Do you remember any of that? Yeah, I think, so when the taxi actually hit me, I blacked out for probably about five minutes. Then I woke up kind of underneath a tree. And it was one of them things where I was like,

I remember the heat from the sun thinking, God, this is really, really hot. And then it was almost like every single memory that had just happened two minutes, five minutes before, came rushing back to my brain. And I was like, oh my God. I remember I kept repeating like, oh my God, he's hit me, he's hit me, he's hit me.

and then just the crowds of people just trying to help. Oh my gosh. Yeah. How long did you have to wait for an ambulance? Was it quick? Well, this is another blessing in disguise because I don't know if a lot of people know this

but because New York is so busy what they do is have ambulances park up on random parts of New York just in case because the traffic's so horrendous. So I think probably like five or ten minutes before not that far away an ambulance had pulled up. Okay. I was probably waiting maybe around 15 minutes for the ambulance to get to me.

God, that still feels like a really long time. But yeah, but in like New York timing and terms, it was great. But a plumber, he ran across the road to see if everything was okay. And he actually saved my life. Did he? Yeah. So he used his belt as a tourniquet to stop me from bleeding to death. So we wrapped it around my thigh.

So, yeah, it was like he was basically my hero. Wow thank God thank God and thank God he knew what to do yeah exactly yeah that's not common is that common I wouldn't know I would personally obviously now I would know but no I had no idea that that is what you would need to do so yeah he he was just like right I haven't got anything I've just got my belt so he just took his belt off wrapped it around and yeah so he yeah he saved my life and you said there were all these people around you trying to help yes That's kind of beautiful. Really, really nice.

Yeah, they didn't have to do that. They could have just, you know, carried a ban on about their day. You know, looked at what was going on, but no, they stopped. They helped. Was it like, it's okay? Hurt his knee. That's it. God, that seems so unfair, isn't it?

Like a little bandage around his knee. Oh, stop. That's it. Oh, my God. So, yeah, I took obviously a lot of the impact. Did anything, was the taxi driver? prosecuted at all um he had a 30 day ban and a 2,000 pound fine but it yeah mounting the carbon yeah yeah yeah the laws are completely different over in america so um the taxi and limousine

commission in america is owned by the state of new york so you're taking on the state it's pretty hard to do we tried but you know yeah my lawyer you know did everything he could yeah but yeah so I mean, your, sorry, your medical fees must have been extraordinary in America as well. They would have been, but I had travel insurance. Oh, thank God. Thank God. Yes, thank God, which I'm like, any, any time you're going away, it don't matter if it's a short 24-hour trip, please make sure you are covered.

Like, they paid for everything. My flight's home, everything. God, that's good. I've never, I've never taken travel insurance in my life. I've been not. I'm going to stop. This is a sign. This is your sign, yes.

Yeah. Yeah. Just look at all the small prints, you know, covered for at least 20 million and you'll be, you'll be good. Because I think mine was close to like 10 million. Seriously. Yeah, I'm not surprised. Yeah. They like charge you per tablet.

So I remember like all in my medical notes, which was like this thick, you know, epidural, you know, painkillers hair, morphine hair, everything. Everything was built. Yeah, I keep seeing these on TikTok of like women who have birth. Oh, yeah, I've seen the same. And then get the bills. Oh my God. It's mad. It's mad. So yeah. But yeah, travel insurance. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's really, really handy. Not to jump around, but I'm confused. Why did he mount the curb? Why did the taxi driver mount the curb? So there's a bit of a rivalry between cyclists and taxi drivers. It's actually a known thing in America. Well, in New York anyway, I should say. They just cut each other up all the time. Right. It's my right of way. It's, you know, you've caught me up. And that's basically they were arguing about that. So he just lost concentration. And he was angry. He was angry.

So he almost like swerved his car. And the curbs in America, they're pretty high. So yeah, he would have, that's why he accelerated so hard to get up the curb, hit him. And then obviously hit me as well. Oh my God. And he only got a 30-day van. That makes me so angry. Yeah.

Have you had to like, I imagine that it's been really traumatic to get over this in general. But I also imagine I would harbour a lot of anger. I did for a while. And I think especially we were waiting to see if he was going to be prosecuted or what was going to happen with that. And then it felt like I came back from New York and I was trying to rebuild my whole entire life. Like everything was no.

Everything had to change. So and then that on top. And I think maybe like four or five months later, obviously I was in, I had to have counselling and everything. And I just thought, being so angry, it's not going to change the situation. I'm still going to live like this. It's not, you know, I'm never going to have to see him again. So there's no point.

It's just extra energy that doesn't need to be put into an area. So, yeah, I kind of just have to not focus on that so, so much. But yeah. Did he apologise? Seven years later. Seven years later. Yeah. seven years later.

Is that how long it took for the prosecution to not be a prosecution? Yeah, actually. Yeah, it would have been around seven years it took. Wow. So it's 2013 to 2020. That's right. Wow.

So how did you get in touch? So I was actually on Lorraine. Yeah. And because we, because they have to talk about certain things that are legal, they have to basically contact them for comment legally. Right. IDE had to contact him.

Yeah, they had to say, you know, we are going to be talking about you when your name is going to be bought up, do you have a comment? Right. And I think all he said is, she has to forgive me. Please tell her,

I am sorry. She has to forgive me. But I just thought, it's too little too late. That's a very weird phrasing as well. Way too late. Because he's run with a narrative like, oh,

it was an accident. It was an accident. Yeah, she's got to get over it. That sounds more like what he's saying. Yeah. I'm desperately sorry and I pray she forgives me. That would have been fine from the start. Yeah, yeah.

But that's not what. it was going on for. What a knob. Yeah. What an actual knob though. I mean, I mean, it was kind of written in the cards, the fact that he just, he mounted the car to try and hit a cyclist. Yeah.

But like, to not, oh, just, yeah, I just can't imagine. Yeah. I would be, like, I couldn't live in myself. I think the grudges that you hold, I don't think you'd be able to let him have Sean's peace and let me know, definitely not, definitely not. My God. But yeah, it's, you know, it was a, I look back now and I think I can't believe that you happened to me you know it was because it was such a surreal thing how old were you i was 24 wow yeah that's mad

yeah but i mean like since then yes you've had you so much you've built such an amazing life and you've lived and i don't want to put words in your mouth but you've lived kind of perhaps on this maybe the same similar path i don't know that you would have ended up on anyway like yeah i mean you've got a happier ending yeah yeah and i think it's it's nice to know that You know, he only has ever took things away from me. I've given myself, like, everything that I've got. So, yeah, it's been nice. So how did you, I mean, so six weeks in New York

and then you were transferred back to the UK. Yes. And then the rehabilitation process began. Yes. And I imagine that was very long and difficult to. Yeah. I mean, did you get a prosthetic straight away? I'm guessing you can't.

No. So basically what happens is, when you have an amputation, your leg has to, your leg's really soft. So it basically has to build its muscle and its strength around it. Right. Obviously I'm 10 years in, so mine's pretty solid now. But when you're there, it's like, no, it's so delicate. So you have to wait a little bit.

So it took me a few months to get a prosthetic leg. But even still, when you get it, it's like half an hour, 45 minutes, an hour, then you have to take it off. And you build it up. So, yeah, and I think maybe it took me a, about a year to be able to wear it fully even still now I'm like when it comes like eight or nine o'clock I'm like oh yeah it's ready to come off now really yeah it just feels that slightly uncomfortable but um the the benefit that I had when training to um walk on a prosthetic was I used to be a stilt walker

no way yeah I was not expecting a skill yeah I used to be a dancer in a stilt walker yeah literally yeah I've always wanted a stil walker on the podcast Can we just pause? Pause. Go back to stilt walking. What? How? Do you go, do you work?

Sorry, I got so many questions about stil. Do you work your way up with stilts or do you just start on the big boys? Yeah. I mean, mine were only ever probably like this high. That's high enough. That's about four or five feet. Yeah, so maybe around here. That's very high.

Yeah, so. I don't think all would be comfortable standing on table. Can't even stand on heels. So basically what you do with the stilts, You don't know if you're walking on like a wet surface. You just have to figure it out. And it's like, oh my God. Okay, you just have to go with it.

Because I used to do it for events, big club openings me and my sister. Yeah, we used to do. You're your sister? Yeah. On stilts? My oldest sister. Oh, my god. If I were your parents, I'd be so proud of me.

They're not like girls on stilts. What ultimate achievement. Yeah. It's so cool. I think, so what I kind of remembered from learning how to walk on stilts was obviously you can't feel surface and when I put it on I said oh my god it literally feels like I'm strapping on a still like when I'm walking and then I remember walking up from you know the bars a few times and he was like you're already really getting this like really well and I was like

it's because I know what I'm doing like it's okay it's still alive yeah so yeah that was my advantage when learning how to walk again how cool is that I'm upset that is really cool That is really cool. That is really cool. Okay, so it's good that you had that as like it. Really, it set you up well. Yeah, it set me up well. But yeah, it took, you know, it was those first few years,

they were, I was at university. So this all happened after my first year. So yeah, I went through obviously all this, all my rehabilitation, then I went back to university. So I only missed about three weeks when it started. Okay. So I still managed to like finish my degree on time with all my friends and,

you know so yeah were you able to go back and live the lives that you were living like the first year back at uni no no i had a completely different experience which you know i'm alive so that's the only positive i can take from that and i you know i still managed to learn everything that i wanted to it took me a long time to figure out what i wanted to do in life and i loved fashion so um yeah so i should need to be a fashion buyer and mentally how did you cope with like i guess the physical changes both how they looked and how they like how they felt in terms of like what they were holding you back from doing well it was it was really tough it was it was really really hard um i think i was trying to i was trying to cling on to the person that i used to be and i was like

i think on some level i kind of just had to split them it's not and sometimes when i speak about the things i used to do before my amputation i do sometimes have to think of that as a previous life because that's what helped me kind of cope um but yeah in terms of like you know i was on a fashion buying course full of girls full of you know um just wearing what they wanted to wear and i i couldn't do that and so that's why it was really really tough but i think you know now it was almost like i had to fall in love with myself and that was really tough but you know with a really good counsellor um i was able to do that yeah you got to get i guess get used to your new normal and that was so hard and it wasn't just myself it was everything yeah it was then i was very very

independent before like i didn't ask anyone to help even if i still kind of do it now even if i need help i'm like no no it's fine i can do it i can do it myself um and that was that was a difficult one because it's like I couldn't drive anymore. I had to, because I can drive an automatic car, but, you know, I've just got a Mini Cooper like six weeks before I left. So that I had to say, it was, everything was just such a process. And even amputees that I speak to today, I'm like, let your journey be your journey. It's fine to see, you know, where I've, I've, you know, where I am now.

But it was a hard graft. Like, you know, you have to look at yourself in the mirror when you don't want to. and just think, okay, if this is what we're working with, we've just got to go for it. Yeah. So, yeah. And what was it that enabled you to like, did you find the tools, I guess, beyond counselling?

Because obviously you do, you love your exercise now. Yes. But I guess that has to be like recalibrated. Yeah. Because you can't just do what you were doing before either. No. And was it a question of like, I'm going to throw myself back into it and work out how to do it

Or was it like, I don't know, like, because I don't know, were you scared to do it? Or like, yeah. Yeah, no, I get, I got, how did you rebuild that relationship? No, I was, I was petrified. I was just, but I think I've always, again, the person I was before,

I've always just gone for things. I've always been that kind of person that figures it out. I'm like, okay, you know, if things are getting hard, we'll just figure it out, basically. It's like, even when I started motivational speaking, I was like, I think the first one I ever did was in front of like 300 students and their parents.

And I was like, what the hell am I doing? You should have started with a small class of 20. You know, a regular person would do that, but you, no. So I think it's just in my nature to just go for things. If they don't work out, they don't work out. So, yeah, when I remember going to the gym for the first time and I went, I was like, right, okay, so I went with my husband. And I was just looking, I thought, I don't belong here. Like, what am I doing?

I'm delusional. Like, I genuinely do not belong here. And I remember, you know, we had a PT and it was like, you know, you can do a lot of the things here, right? And I was like, no. Well, okay, come on. I'm going to show you. So, you know, it took, you know, me to actually go in there for then there is help.

You know, I didn't know that I could do that. Yeah. So, yeah, it is. It's just putting myself in the deep end quite a lot. You mentioned your husband? Yes. When did he, when did he pop up? Was you with him before or before your accident or what?

Yeah, so I was actually with him before my accident. We met only a year before. Okay. So when it all happened, he actually, I flew to New York, he flew to Ibiza. We was meant to come back to the UK and then two days later we were going to Paris. So, you know, he landed, he had like 30 missed calls. And then obviously had to wait in the airport to get a flight back to the UK. So yeah, I remember like he was in the army.

He was in the army, so he's seen people of amputations. He's not shy when it comes to people looking different when you've known them previously before. So I remember, yeah, he flew straight with my mom and dad. And yeah, we've been together ever since. And you've got two babies. And we've got two babies. One's not so much of a baby anymore.

No, she's not. A little sass part. But yeah, so, but yeah, it's like, that was hard as well. Like somebody loves you, but you don't love yourself. So it's, you know, it can be hard on them as well because, you know, he was trying to watch me navigate through all of it.

And, you know, yeah, it was hard for him as well, for sure. Yeah, I guess there's only so much that he can do, right? Exactly. Do say, you know. But yeah. It's amazing, though, that you have kind of grown because that's such a massive change. You already changed in a relationship that long. Yeah.

So much. And it's amazing that you, went through something so early and you found your way through it together. Yeah. And yeah, I guess, yeah, I don't know. That's really beautiful. Thank you. You've been able to do that and you've got your kids and like, that's wonderful.

It's lovely. Yeah. Like what you said that it was hard having someone loved you when you didn't love yourself. Yeah. That's really, God, that makes me feel emotional. That must have been so. Yeah, it was really. really hard but I think what I I think what he recognized that I needed was tough love so

okay that was something we you know I didn't know that that's what would help me through but you know sometimes if you come home and I've been crying and you know he'd like no this isn't what we're doing get up we're going out like you know you sort of have a military man yeah it was yeah it really was so I'd be like oh okay and then in the end that is what I needed. I needed someone to be like, this isn't what we're doing. This isn't how we're going to live our life.

Yeah. We're going to get up and we're going to keep going. And I like that he's describing it as our life. Yeah. And we. That's it. Do you feel like you've kind of done it as part of a team? 100%.

Yeah. And like you're going back to the gym with him for the first time. That's it. That's really cool. Yeah. That's really cool. Yeah.

But he is. We are a team. Any, you know, any job that comes in. I'm like, do you think I'll be your, babe, say yes. Figure out the kids. We'll figure out the schedule. Just say yes, do it.

Love that. I'm like, okay, okay, babe. How was carrying two pregnancies? Do you say carrying pregnancies? That's not it, is it? Oh no, yeah. One night. Carrying two babies.

That must be difficult because your first, that was not too long after the accident, right? No, it wasn't that long after. Well, I didn't know what was going to happen. Yeah. I mean, I'd, you know, I got pregnant and I actually remember when I was in hospital with that. And I said to one of the nurses, I was like, can I still have a baby? And she was like, I think, I think you'll be okay.

Like, you'll be fine. But I was like, dead emotional. Like, oh. But yeah, do you know what? Surprisingly, I was okay. It was only the last trimester. I started to swell. And this is in carbon fiber.

So there's no room. There's no, like, stretch. so my leg oh it was yeah it was hard to walk on in the end but this time with with my second it wasn't too bad okay but yeah first first one and how about afterwards because it's like you were describing something earlier and I thought god that really like feels like the postpartum cloud where it's like you know you have to relearn who you are and you kind of treat yourself as like before your accident and after your accident I guess then you kind of do it again is you recalibrate when you become a mom and how was that like

well, just in general, but also did your injury kind of play a part in any of that self-identification and that struggle? I think, to be honest, it had the opposite effect in a really lovely way because I used to suffer really bad with anxiety, intrusive thoughts were crazy. So at the point where I, say if I was at home and say I just needed to go and do a food shop, I would every hour I'd be like, oh no, because you can't go now because you've got a parcel come in. You can't go now because, oh, you've got to let the dogs out. You've got, I would talk myself out of it,

but I was anxious to leave the house. But I think when I had Aria, I was like, you've got to leave the house. You don't want to pass on all this negative anxiety onto your child. You know, I want to take it to a group. I want to, you know, I want to be that mom that, you know, I'm at home.

I want to go for walks and things like that. and so she made me better in a way because yeah that's wonderful that's so lovely yeah you just you just had to i had to yeah and it was just the just the fact that i just i didn't want her to almost think of me as just being the person that's at home yeah so i was like no we we've got we've got to we've got to push through this so yeah that's what we did going back to exercise yes Were you big on exercise before your accident, or is it something that came afterwards as like a, like something that was therapeutic for you? I think when it comes to, yeah, exercise before, like I said, I was a dancer. So I have always been at classes, whether it be a boxer size class, going to the gym, running, swimming.

I've always been super active. And I just, I loved that about myself before. And, you know, obviously going through the amputation, I thought, well, that's what I enjoy. What do I enjoy now? So now that I've been able to, you know, reconfigure everything and know that I am still okay in these spaces because exercise makes me feel amazing. So I want to continue that. So, yeah, I, you know, still do boxing classes and go to the gym.

And, yeah, figured out how, I remember learning how to swim on my first holiday with my dad, like, after my amputation. I was like, got in the water, I had a swimming leg. and I thought you know what I can actually swim better without this leg so I just I've taught myself how to swim just with one leg so yeah it's it's always been quite I would say a quite a big part of my life I would say yeah how did you like find the confidence from that first session with the PT where he's like you can do it yeah I don't know like I don't know how to do you know did you stick with a PT for I assume it was a man but yeah but did you

stick like with a PT for a while or did you just start because I imagine and this is something that like I hear a lot with the hags and the community that I run that like and I know it myself you go into the gym and you think I don't want to look different I don't want to be the one that's I don't want to be the one that doesn't know what they're doing like I always feel like and I know it's a really common thing that people feel like like people can smell out a beginner yeah they just know if you don't know and like I guess you had to relearn so much and like how did you have the confidence how did you build the confidence to relearn everything and do that i think definitely having um the pt did help my confidence i would say um and that's just because like i said because i didn't

know what my body could do and he was like you know you can do this one you could do so i kind of made myself a little routine yeah around it and then i kind of just stuck to what i know yeah and then that built my confidence i would say but yeah pt definitely helped yeah yeah Yeah, I'll put out, yeah, knowledge. Yeah, knowledge, it is. Are you, because like, I feel like, um, you found running, and it's become, like, really crucial now for your mental health. Yes.

And to, like, keep you sane. Yeah. Are you of that ilk? Like, do you feel like you have to do exercise to keep yourself in, like, a positive mindset and space? Is it, like, is it vital for your relationship? your mental health? I think it is, it has become that way for me.

For sure, I, I always notice when I haven't done something. Yeah. So, you know, when you realize that and it's like, oh, no, I haven't. I haven't done that today or my routines just, you know what it's like when you've got kids. It's like no day is the same. So making that time for myself, I know that it, that is a big part for my mental health. Yeah.

But yeah, I just, it is just having that time, you know, you're so, busy work kids house cleaning it could but having that time whatever it is that you enjoy um it's so important yeah can i ask about your body image in general since your recovery and yeah since kind of i guess arriving back home with a different body to the one that you left with and it does sound like you've had to learn you had to learn how to love yourself yeah and it does and like your partner was like an amazing person to help you through that process but then I suppose within that like you say you were in fashion school where maybe everybody looks away and how have you handled or like found and through pregnancies as well yeah mind your accident but like

how have you had like found or rebuilt your confidence in terms of your body image um I would say it's been a process I don't think it's something that I think I think the crucial part for me was I had a really bulky prosthetic leg and it was completely covered. I was going for a time where I didn't want to look different. I didn't want people to even know I had a prosthetic leg. So I had this leg. It was a really nice leg and they covered it with skin and it was really, really heavy. I could not walk on it.

It would cause me sores all the time. and I learned a huge lesson and I say this to my students and I always say if you cover up who you are you will hurt yourself because I was walking on a leg honestly it was just

I look back now I think Sean what were you doing it was so uncomfortable and then I remember when I needed a new leg and I just said I'm done I don't want it covered if this is who I'm meant to be then the whole world needs to see

and I think it was that split moment where I thought okay we're all right this it doesn't look too bad it's really cool um you know I've got a big skin graft scar and you know multiple scars and I just think this is your one body yeah that's it it's the the the one body that you're born with and that you will die with why why we're going to mistreat it so I think when I realized that everything else just became so positive even when it came to you know going to shop for shoes clothes I wasn't oh I can't wear that no no do you know what I'm going to figure it out I'm going to figure out how to do this and I genuinely think when I when I had those moments of just being more positive everything changed yeah I guess I guess you need to go

through those initial yeah that initial period of you know I just I don't want to look any different like I'm going to try and cover up and like pretend that nothing happened I imagine you need to go through that I needed I needed to yeah yeah I don't think you know I mean I can't speak for every especially amputee out there um but I didn't I didn't like who I was and it is hard to look at yourself a different way and I don't know if it's the same for anybody else but um I really needed that I needed to almost sounds bad hate myself in order to realize what I what I needed and that my life still had meaning. Yeah.

What did you say? I loved that if you cover yourself, if you cover up who you really are, you hurt yourself? Is that what you said? Yeah. I really love that. And I, cause I take that big prosthetic into my classes

and they're like, Miss, this is really heavy. And I'm like, pass it around, pass it around the class, all have a go. So yeah, they love it. And I think, you know, especially young girls, navigating social media. And I love that I can, you know, I put that in my,

talks when I go into schools and I can see the kids really listening because people are lost. Yeah. A hundred percent and I think like I mean the whole point of this campaign that we're doing in the first place was that like we've talked about it loads about how like Finn is back at the moment. Yeah. And like people Googling the question like quick ways to lose weight or something of that variety is up 552%. Isn't that crazy? And it feels like but like sort of weight like but all body ideals it's like

perfection quest that we are all on is so mad and I don't know like I think it's amazing that you're not just doing this online but like you say like going in and like actually connecting with

kids and letting them see beauty in a different way perhaps than what they're seeing just absolutely because I think you know all of them have phones yeah you know

they're all on social media media and it's how they use it. I always say to them, it's your responsibility on how you use this. You know, if you're going to consume yourself with, you know, all this, you know, whatever you think a body type should be,

then that's what you're going to consume and that's what you're going to think is the only way. And it's like, it's like this whole thing, all those questions and the search. And what we're all on is all like how to fix myself. That's it. It feels like I'm a problem and I need. fixing and it's like no no you're you are not the problem yeah at all and I think that

message I always say the younger I can get in schools the better because it's like I can try and program their brain a different way into seeing things so again with the Google search and everything it's like I I can't believe it's 2024 and that's this that's the search I know and we had like we had such a good run we know we really did like we were it felt like we were really on the right path and changing things and it's just like yeah just come back down to earth with a bang and we're going into summer I was talking about this the other day as part of the this campaign I was talking to someone about it and it's like the amount of people coming into summer holidays now that just won't do it won't go like won't yeah yeah it's another summer that you just

let pass you by because you're scared to be seen or scared to show yourself as you are. Can I ask about, sorry, to jump back again, but how was it for you, what time of year did your accident happen? August. So the following summer, was that when you were kind of trying to hide? Yeah. How was it when it was time for you to just like get to your body back out again? I didn't like it.

And I think it was maybe it was the April, because I, I knew it was short season. Or you know, I knew that it was gonna get hotter and I would need to wear less clothes. So because I knew that, I was like, right, okay, what can I do? And my process is like, well, this is the option. I'm like, yeah, yeah, let's do that. Because it felt safe and it felt like I needed to do it.

And then I think I lasted maybe nine months. And I was like, this isn't the way to go. Yeah. This is not it. So yeah, that's when I, decided no enough's enough and you're right it is cool you do look very cool thank you thank you love it still training's paying up yeah but yeah I just I just think you know like I said we just get one body one life it's like and like you said about the summers we

unfortunately life is life we don't know when we don't know when our time is up we don't Yeah. You know, so I would hate someone to, you know, live a life and it's not been theirs. Yeah. It's been always other people's opinions and that's not right. No. No. Yeah, that's so well said.

So the campaign revolves around the idea of 15 minutes to take the weight off your mind. Yes. That's very cool. Have you had anybody get angry with you for misunderstanding the ad thinking you would be in a wait-list video? My friend did message me and she was like, Sean, I was slightly concerned of what I was going to see. And then when I got to the end, I was like, oh, thank God. So yeah, but I suppose that's the impact that this campaign is going to have because people just think, oh, it's another weight loss ad. No.

Yeah. It's, you know, because 15 minutes is all you need. It's just clarity of the mind. It's just that 15 minutes for yourself. and you can feel amazing. What is your 15 minutes? What do you do? I, so boxing is my favourite.

That's what you want to do out. I love boxing. Boxing's really cool. I love it. I haven't done it since I gave, well, since I got pregnant. Yeah. I really want to get back into it.

But I had loads of problems with my scar and I'm like, just desperate to do it again. I feel like of all of the therapies, that of all the way that exercises therapy boxing feels like the most like tangible. But I always really struggled. Everyone's like,

imagine the person that you hate the most in the bag and I'm like, I can't do this. I can't see you boxing. I don't. I can't see you boxing. I'm quite good at it in a strength way. I can't see that. I can't see coordination in your strength. Are you doing?

No. You can't see strength. I'm so deeply insulted. Sorry, I'm so sorry. So you can't see strength in this marathon running, weightlifting. Different kind of strength, you know. Are you good at running strength? No, no, I'm deeply hurt.

Oops. I'm deeply hurt. I'm going to go to co-box next week. I'm not going to invite you. I'm going to be a best in the class. But no, like, and boxing will make you sweat more than anything. Like, it almost like sees me off and I love it. Yeah.

It's so good. I'm like, that was amazing. But yeah, I love it. I would say that's my number one and I just love a good walk. I love. I love to walk. You started walking, though. I have started walking, I have.

Yeah, I've sent me a message the other day. She's like, it took having a baby, but I finally understand why you walk. Yeah. It's, I just, there's just something about it. Someone sent me a message when I was pregnant that said, if in doubt, get outside or put them in water. Like, get outside or get in water.

Get water, yeah. And it was like the same for both of me and the baby. It was like, you either need to get them in water or you need to get them outside for either, and it works for both. And it is foolproof. Like, I've done it. with all of it from the very beginning.

I'm like, out we go. Yeah, let's get out. We're both crying. That's time we go outside. Get some fresh air. It's always worked with Tommy, apart from two days ago. And I was like, we've got to go out.

We're going to go to the little lake spires. We've got to go because he's just screaming. And that stops him. Obviously getting out, stops him, but it didn't stop him. Oh, no. And it's the first time I've been in public when he just will not stop screaming.

And I was like, throwing like dummies at him, like Sophie the giraffe, like Captain Calamari. I was like, take it. anything you want but please shush. Your life's going to change in like two weeks when you start weaning him because I can't give them snacks. Snacks. Oh my god I can't wait for snacks. Little, here you go. Yeah. Literally as I'm driving it's just like biscuits. It's just like thrown to the back. I love that. That would stop me crying as well actually. So I'm crying like cookie. Okay.

I'm fine. Oh Sean this has been so great. I've loved talking to you. Thank you so much for having me. It's so fun. Yeah. Thank you so much. going on and sharing your story with us and being part of this campaign too it's such a cool campaign and we're really happy that you are yeah that you came into the studio thank you so much we'll put all of your details in the show notes and if you work in a school um get chanin to come talk to your kids yes i'd love to i'd love to she got a message to spread i have absolutely and your big leg that you take with you right yes to show them what you still have to walk around yeah they love it john thank you so much thank you bye

Bye! To find out more about A6's alternative weight loss message, go to www.a6.com forward slash 15 minute weight loss.